POS Poate – More vapid than your mom

So I got nothing.

Been really busy at work. Doing a major install of a suite of bioreactors. Kinda cool set-up: this install is in the 2.5 million range, so there is a little pressure to do a really good job.

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Whole Lotta Nope

The wildlife in Florida is varied and deadly. We’re not quite Australia, but we’re not far.

Venomous Snakes: 6 – Eastern Diamondback, Pygmy Diamondback,Timber Rattlesnake, Copperhead, Water Moccasin, and Eastern Coral

Venomous Spiders: 5 – the Southern Black Widow, Northern Black Widow, Red Widow, Brown Widow and Brown Recluse

Random Animals: Black Bears, Wild Boars, Alligators, Sharks, Jellyfish, Florida Panther

Those are just the ones indigenous to Florida. Because people are stupid and lazy and incompetent, they bring potentially dangerous animals into Florida via smuggling. We now have Nile Crocodiles in Florida.

A team of scientists has identified three reptiles captured near Miami as Nile crocodiles, a species native to Africa.
Through DNA testing, scientists from the University of Florida were able to confirm that the reptiles captured in the wild from 2009, 2011 and 2014 were Nile crocodiles, the second-largest extant reptile species in the world.
But Florida’s largest and most destructive invasive species by far is the Burmese Python. Introduced to the Everglades, largely escaping during the massive damage due to Hurricane Andrew, these snakes have now made their home here and are the Kings of the Glades. With no natural predators and a climate that is perfect for them to breed, they are dominating.

An examination of the digestive systems of 104 pythons killed this year in a public hunting competition turned up the remains of seven alligators, 50 mammals — including two deer — and 38 birds.

It was ample evidence of the toll the non-native constrictors were taking on Everglades wildlife.

Alligators. The damn things eat freaking alligators.

And just this week, a 15 FOOT BURMESE PYTHON was captured and what did they find in it’s stomach? Not 1, not 2, but 3 deer. It ate 3 deer in 90 days.
burmese-python-deer-0
When they checked the contents of the snake’s stomach, all they found was some fur, a few teeth, and hooves.
burmese-python-deer-5
It’s not just the people that are out of control in Florida, it’s the animals too. Whole lotta nope.

Bill Clinton’s Weenus

 

This will be an exploration of my long held theory that Bill will not allow Pickles McParkinsons to win the election so that he can continue to dick bimbos for the short remainder of his life.

Have you seen the first dude lately? He looks like he hasn’t had a decent meal in ten years or that his alleged syphilis is finally winning the war on women. I kid, I kid. He’s a vegan so you know he has syphilis.

So here’s the theory, in case you missed it in my survey class taught at Muppet U, or if you forgot what was written in the first paragraph: Bill will do anything to prevent Smiley McOpenmouth from getting in the oval office. Way too important to keep his little Gore wet. Yes, for those of you scoring at home, he calls his blank shooter Al Gore.

I bet you’re thinking I’m totally wrong. That the allure of being half of the first ever male/female presidential couple is just too, er, alluring. Consider this: whenever things get good for her, he trots out some sorry statement that even he, a veritable Da Vinci of lying can’t clean up.

Man, that’s gonna sting. Don’t get me wrong, no one cares what he said…except for the only man that might actually make a difference in the election: Golfy McOkieDoke. St Trayvon’s Dad is notoriously thin skinned and its well known that Obama and Bill already hate each other. Bill once told Obama that he should be getting him coffee rather than schlonging his wife (that’s Web Hubble’s job) and Obama’s black half never got over it. If you locked these two in a bedroom closet only one would emerge–probably Bill with panties on his head, wearing high heels, but that’s besides the point.  The hate is real my groovy babies, the hate is real.

Weenus + Viagra >Husband + Most Powerful Woman in the World

Its math, and therefore indisputable, although its probably racist.

FIN

 

 

Wire Starter

Introducing Joe Hengst and Sarah Joncas.

Like peanut butter and jam.

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Big Boob Friday

Hello cannonballers. This is a journey into sound…And by sound I mean boobs. Let’s face it (Carly Fiorina), the only reason you’d come here on a Friday is for xBrad’s hilarious jokes and the sweet, sweet sounds of boobs flapping together.

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This song will really makes you want to dance. 

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Today’s model is famous of something other than having big cans. Kidding! She’s an actress that’s famous for knowing how to read lines while the camera focuses on her really big cans! Anyhoo, her name is Diora Baird and apparently she was in a bunch of slasher flix. Imagine her running through a forest in a tank top screaming. That’s her life’s work. Please stop protesting your nazi poop and welcome wasshername!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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BBF

Hello Amishmen, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

I started singing this song during a conversation about weird MN traffic rules with Pupsterboy2, who just gave me the what-the-hell look and begged me to stop. It’s criminal. There ought to be a law.

 

 

Your model for today has previously been linked as a gif, but never featured until now that I found her name. She was born on May 19th, 1991 in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, and has appeared in Playboy and done some pretty extensive video and studio work. She seems like a good sport and has fun with her bags, and stands 5’3″ and 103lbs, 32DDD-23-31. Please stop ATMing long enough to welcome, Miss Lindsey Pelas!

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Give Em What They Want

I think you know where this is going…

True story: I saw Natalie Merchant at U of I with Sheryl Anderson. It was sugary sweet.

Cheerful woman eating chocolate

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