Did you ever wonder what a covert ops team would be like if the members were Hostages? I didn’t either, but I found out last night, and I enjoyed the experience. I’m not even sore this morning, and I don’t have a funky aftertaste in my mouth, either.
The movie centers on a special forces team sent to Bolivia to help a drug lord into Satan’s warm embrace. But shortly after they help to paint the target, something goes horribly, awfully wrong, and being good guys, they try to call the attack off, only to find that their mysterious puppet master knows what the problem is, and doesn’t care.
Being good guys, they race the clock to set things right, still end up killing the bad guy, and just when they think that everything is going to work out, they are betrayed, and set up as murderers in the same event. Because their betrayer doesn’t know that they are dead, they decide to take advantage of it. But being as they are trapped in a turd world country, making the money they need even to get back home is tough. After a few months, they are approached by a mysterious woman who knows all about them, and all about the man who betrayed them. And she offers them a chance at payback, with the clear understanding that it is likely a one way trip.
After some discussion and a review of their intrepid leader’s lousy track record with the ladies (one actually tried to blow him up), they decide to take her up on her offer. What follows is a non-stop thrill ride with ambushes, plans gone awry, betrayal, priorities, and revenge. But being
Hostages The Losers, they never say die, and they end up saving the world, at least for today, even if their evil nemesis manages to get away.
The cast clicked well. Jeffrey Dean Morgan did his best Robert Downey Jr. imitation, Chris Evans was great as the team’s Rosetta, and Zoe Saldana can have that brutal foreplay with me anytime…as long as she promises not to break anything, and wake me for the fun part after.
This is the best action flick I have seen in quite a while. The acting was good, the dialogue engaging and funny, and the premise, oddly enough, believable. If you have to make a choice about whether to watch this or the Expendables on a Friday or Saturday night, pick The Losers. Trust me on this. You won’t be disappointed.