ember shoes | Talking trash about your newborn since March 2009

BBF

Hello best friends, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

Your model for today was born October 13th, 1988 in Mount Union, Pennsylvania. 5′ 4″, 44-28-36 and 135lbs, please keep traffic moving and welcome Miss Christy Marks!

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October 20, 2017
Categories: 4/10 Would Still Smash, And Now Another Poat by Pupster, BBF, Boobs, but not the good kind, dicking bimbos, Double or nothing, ember shoes, Emily's Dull Affect, fat chicks, Fourth Grade, Genital Itch, Hambone, Heavy Metal Thunder, Hosefuckers, Hulk Smash, Invisible Hand Spanking Machine, Knockers, meatdickbreath, meghan mccain fat, mesadick, Moist, motorboating done wrong, Nice Melons, pelvic rest, pelvic thrust, pron, robust hindquarters, shut your whore mouth, Snake juice guzzler, those are some big boobs, tubgirl, TurtleFacePlant, What the Fuck, Jenny? . . Author: Pupster . Comments: 257 Comments

BBF

Hello anticipators and wally-ballers, welcome to Big Boob Friday,

Your model for today was born August 20, 1980 in Baltimore, Maryland. 5’7″, 34D-24-34 and 119lbs, please pick up the spare and welcome Miss Christi Shake!

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October 6, 2017
Categories: 10/10 Would Smash, And Now Another Poat by Pupster, asshole, bacon, bad trip, Balls, BBF, bbq, Beanie, Beaver Button, Boobs, braunschweiger, but not the good kind, Dang. I mean...dang., Dog Centric, ember shoes, flick it, flick it good, Hulk Smash, I am, John Galt, Knockers, Lactation, Mercurochrome, Muddle My Mint, Nice Melons, No Drama, O, Okay, Old Person, pelvic rest, pelvic thrust, police involvement, redhead, Redhead Bonus Points, Rub meat, Sac and Fox, slut, Snake juice guzzler, Suck It., Sure Why Not, taste the rainbow, those are some big boobs, Totally Nude, TurtleFacePlant, What the Fuck, Jenny?, whatever, Who You Calling Racist?, You're gonna love my nuts . . Author: Pupster . Comments: 261 Comments

BBF

Hello hungry friends, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

Your model was born June 1st, 1987 in Prague, Czech Republic. 5’8″, 40F-28-36 and 136 lbs, please say hello to Miss Shione Cooper!

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August 11, 2017
Categories: 10/10 Would Smash, And Now Another Poat by Pupster, asshole, bacon, Baconwrappedboobbeer, Balls, barely passable trannies, BBF, bbq, Beanie, Beaver Button, Black helicopters, Boobs, Booze, braunschweiger, Brian Williams, Brut, but not the good kind, Buzzcut, Cash for Crunkers, CHAD, Chicks dig a nice tool, Compound W, Consumption, Coonskin, Dan Rather, Dang. I mean...dang., Double or nothing, Drinking heavily, Easter Pig, ember shoes, fat chicks, foreskin, Fourth Grade, fucking genius, Genital Itch, groomin' your shroom, Hambone, Hanks, Happy, Hardware, High and tight, homophobe, I feel like chicken tonight., I used to be funneh and shit, Jayson Blair, Jesus Freak, Knockers, Lactation, Make Him Stop - everybody probably, misogyny, motorboating done wrong, Nice Melons, One Foot Muff, pelvic rest, pelvic thrust, pron, Rub meat, She-Meat, slut, Stetson, Stetson (for men), Suck It., Sure Why Not, taste the rainbow, This is fucking bullshit, those are some big boobs, TITS, Totally Nude, tubgirl, Tuesday, TurtleFacePlant, weiner, What the Fuck, Jenny?, whatever, whiskey, wisermeany . . Author: Pupster . Comments: 124 Comments

BBF

Hello hummers and dogs who know the words, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

Your model today was born on March 19, 1995 in Basingstoke, Hampshire, England. She measures 30G-24-32 on the headturner scale, and stands 5’10” and the obligatory 125 lbs. Please get off the barre and welcome, Miss Jamie Love aka Alice Brookes!

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March 31, 2017
Categories: #hashtag, 9/11 Bush's fault, And Now Another Poat by Pupster, asshat anonymous, asshole, bacon, Balls, BBF, Black helicopters, Boobs, Booze, Brazil, Brian Williams, but not the good kind, Chocolate, Chubs, conspiracy theory, Don't Make Me Kill You, Double or nothing, Easter Pig, ember shoes, furry, Garden, Grippe, Hambone, Hanks, Hardware, Incisor, Jesus Freak, Kinky Afro, Knockers, Lactation, Lesbians, Literature, Microvag, misogyny, Oprah's Slut Club, paris hilton whore, pelvic rest, pelvic thrust, people make me sick, Redhead Bonus Points, Rub meat, Stetson, Stetson (for men), Stop Trying To Make TuesD'AWWW Happen, stupid fucking hippies, Things that really matter, This is fucking bullshit, those are some big boobs, weiner, whatever, Where's Cyn? . . Author: Pupster . Comments: 138 Comments

BBF

Hello students, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

God I love that song.

Me: Big boat deluxe, big boat denied

Google Play: Big boat devolves, big boat deny

Lyrics A-Z: Big broken love, big broken knives

Revolve Lyrics: Big boat deloves, big boat denies

Your model was born in Brisbane, Queensland, Australia on February 5th, 1991, and currently resides in Los Angeles, California. She stands 5′8″, 110lbs and 34C-24-34 on the nevergonnahappen scale. Please stop ignoring the pussy and welcome, Miss Ellie Gonsalves!

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March 24, 2017
Categories: alcohol, ann coulter, asshole, bacon, Balls, BBF, bbq, Beanie, Beaver Button, beefcake, Boobs, Booze, Breitbart, but not the good kind, Cheedy, cheese, Chicks dig a nice tool, Chocolate, Chubs, cool tunes, Dan's Pickled Nutsack, Dang. I mean...dang., duck face, Easter Pig, ember shoes, gardenblogging, Hai Karate, Hambone, Hanks, Hardware, I am judging you, I Will Kick Your Ass, Knockers, Like you know how to read., Lumber, meghan mccain fat, Methadone Clinic Cougar, oxycontin, pelvic rest, pelvic thrust, personal junk, police involvement, POON!, racist, rape culture, Say "What" Again, Secret Santa, shut your whore mouth, slut, Space pens, Stetson, Stetson (for men), Suck It., Sure Why Not, taste the rainbow, TITS, Totally Nude, TurtleFacePlant, Where's Cyn? . . Author: Pupster . Comments: 140 Comments

The Short Bus

Lauraw wears crocks

Up with the sun, gone with the wind

Everyone said Pup was lazy

Leaving my home

Leaving my friends

Running when things got too crazy

Out on the road, out ‘neath the stars

Feeling the breeze, passing the cars

I think my dictionary has a Bob Seger filter, it tried to change “Passing” to “Passin”.

Rock on with your bad selves today my friends.

March 14, 2017
Categories: asshole, bacon, Balls, Beer, Booze, Breitbart, Brut, but not the good kind, Cheedy, cheese, duck face, Earworm dammit, Ed Balls, ember shoes, fat chicks, Fourth Grade, fucking genius . . Author: Pupster . Comments: 230 Comments

Big Boob Friday

Hello weekday and weekend warriors. This has been a really interesting week for the MJ household. First, I found out that although interpuppet sex generally doesn’t end with procreation, we have succeeded. Second, wiser can suck a dick, nay a whole bag of them. And finally, the blog really misses Cyn. Whatever Jimbro, Pupster, and James did to run her off will requires punishment. I suggest that we each send them a flaming bag of gratitude.

I wrote this song for Hotspur.

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February 24, 2017
Categories: #Problematic, asshat anonymous, Breitbart, Brown Snow, Cheedy, cheese, dicking bimbos, Electrical, ember shoes, If You Don't Like PattyAnn, illuminati, libtards, Microvag, milestones, Rocky Dennis, Ronaldus Maximus, taste the rainbow, unicorns, unintended consequences, Your dad likes this, Your mom likes this, Your Welcome Hotspur . . Author: MJ . Comments: 160 Comments

BBF

Hello milk drinkers and tiara wearers, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

Your model for today was born October 24th, 1993 in Stillwater, Minnesota, Canada. She measures 5’9″, 35-24-35. Please stop lamenting long enough to welcome, Miss Alex Hanson!

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November 11, 2016
Categories: American Hero, ann coulter, Baconwrappedboobbeer, BBF, bbq, Beaver Button, Boobs, dicking bimbos, ember shoes, Jeebus, Lactation, mesadick, Pleurisy, robust hindquarters, rush limbaugh, Suck It., those are some big boobs . . Author: Pupster . Comments: 197 Comments

BBF

Hello again, my friends, the wandering land mammal returns to welcome y’all to Big Boob Friday…short sprint and long pole edition.

I’d like to thank MJ for his capable management of this august institution, I shall endeavor to persevere in the spirit with which BBF was originally founded.

I wrote this song after finding today’s model, and then gave it to Eddie Money. He couldn’t get the spirit of the lyrics until I told him to start singing out only of one side of his mouth, then he became a big star.

Today’s model was born in Maryland in 1990, and is an adult model and highly skilled porn star. She stands 5′ tall and 120lbs, and measures 36-24-34 with big ol’ DD aftermarket face-smackers. Please stop trying to explode all over Pam Geller long enough to welcome, Miss Rainia Belle aka Lilith Lust!

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May 8, 2015
Categories: alcohol, American Hero, ann coulter, asshole, bacon, Balls, BBF, bbq, Boobs, Booze, ember shoes, fat chicks, Heavy Metal Thunder, Helen Thomas's Scrotum . . Author: buffalone . Comments: 244 Comments

Big Boob Friday

Hey there everyone. I think you all know what’s going to happen here today. First, let me just say that it’s snowing like a mother fucker her in Denver and I might not get to go home. Shut up wiser. Yes I know it snowed a lot in those places where stupid people live, but it’s snowing here. On me. It’s serious. I blame mare which means….ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I tried to find sexy pictures of Meghan McCain but it appears she’s just too fat for it. Consider yourselves lucky that you didn’t have to peer at the fat boobed bishface this afternoon. In her place, I give you the medium boobed Hunter Leigh!!!!one!!!!!!one!!!!!! Could you put your gentlemans sausage between her mammary glands? Yes. Would you lose your gentlemans sausage between her mammary glands? No. I blame no one because if you tried you’re a winner.