A Tear

 

 

 

 

 

 

BBF

Hello good people, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Your model is a former cam girl, current porn star, who made a video of petting the kitty in the school library that went viral and got her expelled.  Born in Salem, Oregon on June 16, 1995, 5’9″ 32G-25-35 and 125lbs.  Please form an orderly line and check out Miss Kendra Sunderland.

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Obama II: Cockfacefuckaloo

That last word seems made up but it isn’t. If you search for it on the intertitty you’ll find a wealth of information.

So Obama is back, and this time going to kick ass and use cliches, and he’s all out of cliches. The world is stuck like a deer in the headlights of a sixteen wheel suck mobile, paralyzed at his magnificence–or so the media would have you believe.

The truth, harder than a diamond, and as difficult to swallow as a giant bitter pill is that only a few people actually care; rich old liberals and black women. The rest of us are just trying to get on with our lives. The days of our lives, even.

So please, do us a favor, oh God Emperor of the Early Release Television Series, go the fuck away. Obama could build a speech generator using the words, ‘world, future, change, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, let us, hope, and destiny,’ bridged together with terrible sentence formations and almost no one would notice. Just put up a cardboard cut out and play side A of the tape called ‘Flattering Rich Crackers’ then flip it over to side B, ‘I am Black Also, and Understand You.’

Save everyone else some time, dickface. If we wanted to be talked down to or bored to death we’d use bad grammar in a blog post and wait for Hotspur to show up.

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This man, right here, the one I’m pointing to…is a DICK!!!

Tuesday Random Crap

I went to a blacksmithing class on Sunday.  It was a letter opener class, and there were only three of us there, which was nice because it made the class fairly leisurely.  The instructor showed us the basics of the project, and then turned us loose in the forge while she walked around and offered comments and suggestions.  This was the second class that I’ve taken at Adam’s Forge, and I really enjoy it.  Hopefully I’ll be able to attend a few open forge nights in the near future.

LetterOpenersmall

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BBF

Hello students, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

God I love that song.

Me:  Big boat deluxe,  big boat denied

Google Play:  Big boat devolves, big boat deny

Lyrics A-Z:  Big broken love, big broken knives

Revolve Lyrics:  Big boat deloves, big boat denies

 

Your model was born in Brisbane, Queensland, Australia on February 5th, 1991, and currently resides in Los Angeles, California.  She stands 5′8″, 110lbs and 34C-24-34 on the nevergonnahappen scale.  Please stop ignoring the pussy and welcome, Miss Ellie Gonsalves!

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Worst Secret Santa Gifts Evah

We’re entering one of the most wonderful times of the year in a Hostage’s life: Secreting Santa Time! In addition to the thrill of giving we also get the pleasure of receiving (SYWM). First, a little Christmas music to set the mood.

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Gros Seins Vendredi

Hello office twerkers, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Your model for today is a 20 year old French woman, model and law student. Please stop cross-fitting and welcome, Miss Audray de Macedo!

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Orange Wire

Vik Muniz

b. 1961 Sao Paulo, Nova Scotia.

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Eclectic and prolific, there is an entire universe of Muniz to explore.

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Yet again, I was not aware of Muniz before researching for this column which is odd in that he’s a really famous artist.  It just goes to show how low-brow, under-exposed, pedestrian, and milquetoast I truly am.

But enough about my virtues; let me succinctly highlight one of my many faults.  I have a poor concept of the passage of time when I am working on a production.  Please allow me to ask a straight faced question.

Did I miss posting last Tuesday?

don’t ask me.  I’m not myself these days.  Well, that’s not entirely true.  I am myself but this myself is not the myself that kicks it at The H2.  This is who I was prior 2009 and my re-deployment to film life has been an unique vignette into how my life would have been different had I zigged instead of zagged when I retired.

I miss you.

I am exhausted.

 

 

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Cross Wire

And so we find ourselves with one foot on the dock and one on the boat.

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