We need a little … culture. It’s been lacking here since Mr Chumpo went into the Witness Protection Program. I like woodcuts so woodcuts.
A Farts’ Tale – POS Pooting
Because this is a classy place
&
I am most assuredly a classy guy –
Some Music:
Some Poetry:
“”Sing, sweet bird, I kneen nat where thou art!”
This Nicholas anon let fle a fart
As greet as it had been a thonder-dent
That with the strook he was almost yblent (blinded)
And he was ready with iron hoot
And Nicholas ammyd the ers he smoot.[7]”
Some Art: (no not that kind)
Merry Christmas
Wow, seems like we were just using our Halloween avatars! Christmas stuff has been on display for weeks in my neck of the woods and I’m sure it’ll be worse the next time I go in a store.
Baby Watch
T-minus three months until total loss of sleep, life, and mind. I’m counting on all of you hostage aunts, uncles, and somewhere in between, to keep me honest and give me tons of advice on how to raise a baby. Every new parent loves to hear about what they’re doing wrong and how its going to permanently scar their child!
Apropos Of Nothing
There are certain words and phrases we occasionally encounter when reading that we sort of know their meaning. We might have looked up them up once in the distant past, know a root word or understood by intuition the intended meaning within the context it was used. “Apropos of nothing” is one of those phrases for me. I don’t think I’ve ever uttered those words in conversation. I may have imagined myself saying them somewhere in the English countryside before politely asking someone to please pass the Grey Poupon mustard. Well, after a lifetime of waiting for the moment, I finally wrote the words in an email to someone where I linked a story about the use of poppy seed oil to increase fertility. I’d never heard of that technique before and was still processing the concept in my head when I wrote a friendly email and just had to share the story. Which is what prompted the “apropos of nothing” lead in to the link.
So what’s it mean? Stolen from the world wide web I give you this definition:
Without reference to anything. // Without any apparent reason or purpose.
Does that sound like anything we all know and love? A certain blog? Rhymes with “The Sausages“? I’m sure you all have similar words you run across that you have the same feeling about.
Obama II: Cockfacefuckaloo
That last word seems made up but it isn’t. If you search for it on the intertitty you’ll find a wealth of information.
So Obama is back, and this time going to kick ass and use cliches, and he’s all out of cliches. The world is stuck like a deer in the headlights of a sixteen wheel suck mobile, paralyzed at his magnificence–or so the media would have you believe.
The truth, harder than a diamond, and as difficult to swallow as a giant bitter pill is that only a few people actually care; rich old liberals and black women. The rest of us are just trying to get on with our lives. The days of our lives, even.
So please, do us a favor, oh God Emperor of the Early Release Television Series, go the fuck away. Obama could build a speech generator using the words, ‘world, future, change, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, let us, hope, and destiny,’ bridged together with terrible sentence formations and almost no one would notice. Just put up a cardboard cut out and play side A of the tape called ‘Flattering Rich Crackers’ then flip it over to side B, ‘I am Black Also, and Understand You.’
Save everyone else some time, dickface. If we wanted to be talked down to or bored to death we’d use bad grammar in a blog post and wait for Hotspur to show up.
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This man, right here, the one I’m pointing to…is a DICK!!!
What change looks like
The Official Sports Team of The Hostages
Honorary Hostage David Thorne – Epic E-mail Exchange
Get TITS2 & The H2 Stuff
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