Weekend H2

Wiserbud Gets a New Co-Host

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Tuesday Placeholder Poat

Jimbro Motivates the Masses

Dancat Wants to Watch CNN

Alex Has Relationship Goals

CARincat Would Like to Speak to You About the Charging Cords

Pendejo is Getting Raptured and Shit

Mare Doesn’t Like Saying the Same Thing Twice

Wiserbud Tones it Down

Phatdog Comes Back from Europe

Pupster Fulfills the Prophecy

Minime Tells Roamiedog About Gym Class

Osodog Spots for the Forklift

 

FOR THE RECORD II

Here is a pic of your dad

bum

While I learn the intricacies of my new MacIntosh  product this is it for today. Busy week for me: partner is on vacation, nurse is in FLA and it’s school vacation…hold me!

Feel free to add updates. Let’s make this a community project.

UPDATE WON:

UPDATE TEW:

This is for Mare:

This is for Jimbro:

MMM On Thursday

(Mountain Man Monday). You did it. You made me order a copy of The Revenant. I’m a big fan of the movie Jeremiah Johnson as well as the TV series Grizzly Adams. That movie and the show came out in my youth when camping in a canvas tent seemed like great fun. As Boy Scouts we averaged about 5 outdoor tent camp outs a year with one winter camp out in a heated cabin and a week at summer camp. We had very few organized activities aside from a morning and evening flag ceremony and mostly just roamed the woods emulating mountain men we saw on TV. In Southeastern Massachusetts  there was more scrub oak and pitch pine than aspen and Bristlecone pine typically found out west in the mountains. Didn’t matter. You find your mountain where you are dammit.

One of you fockers linked this some years back and every once in a while I find the theme song playing in my head

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Whole Lotta Nope

The wildlife in Florida is varied and deadly. We’re not quite Australia, but we’re not far.

Venomous Snakes: 6 – Eastern Diamondback, Pygmy Diamondback,Timber Rattlesnake, Copperhead, Water Moccasin, and Eastern Coral

Venomous Spiders: 5 – the Southern Black Widow, Northern Black Widow, Red Widow, Brown Widow and Brown Recluse

Random Animals: Black Bears, Wild Boars, Alligators, Sharks, Jellyfish, Florida Panther

Those are just the ones indigenous to Florida. Because people are stupid and lazy and incompetent, they bring potentially dangerous animals into Florida via smuggling. We now have Nile Crocodiles in Florida.

A team of scientists has identified three reptiles captured near Miami as Nile crocodiles, a species native to Africa.
Through DNA testing, scientists from the University of Florida were able to confirm that the reptiles captured in the wild from 2009, 2011 and 2014 were Nile crocodiles, the second-largest extant reptile species in the world.
But Florida’s largest and most destructive invasive species by far is the Burmese Python. Introduced to the Everglades, largely escaping during the massive damage due to Hurricane Andrew, these snakes have now made their home here and are the Kings of the Glades. With no natural predators and a climate that is perfect for them to breed, they are dominating.

An examination of the digestive systems of 104 pythons killed this year in a public hunting competition turned up the remains of seven alligators, 50 mammals — including two deer — and 38 birds.

It was ample evidence of the toll the non-native constrictors were taking on Everglades wildlife.

Alligators. The damn things eat freaking alligators.

And just this week, a 15 FOOT BURMESE PYTHON was captured and what did they find in it’s stomach? Not 1, not 2, but 3 deer. It ate 3 deer in 90 days.
burmese-python-deer-0
When they checked the contents of the snake’s stomach, all they found was some fur, a few teeth, and hooves.
burmese-python-deer-5
It’s not just the people that are out of control in Florida, it’s the animals too. Whole lotta nope.

Cheeto Doll Hands vs Pickles McShoutysick

Well well my groovy pets. It looks like another debate season is upon us. The one thing I’ve learned since last time, when Mitt the dog killing automaton who wears magical underwear, was dispatched by Barry the golfing, TV addicted slacker, is that the truth and actual policy has nothing to do with politics.

I’ve been reading columns from the intellectuals today and they are utterly convinced that Ol Lady Goofy Eye is just going to to overwhelm The Based Orange God with her superior knowledge of detailed policy.  The following quote is from Jim Newell, a semi literate blogger at Slate. I’d wager dollars to delicious cream filled donuts that his wife’s boyfriend just won’t listen to him and is voting from Trump. Harrumph!

In the Dec. 15 debate held in Las Vegas, CNN guest questioner Hugh Hewitt asked Trump which element of the aging nuclear triad he felt was most urgently in need of an upgrade. Trump’s response was a jumble of nonsense about Iraq and Syria that made clear he had never heard the term, which refers to land-, air-, or sea-based systems for delivering nuclear weapons. That’s not great. But it’s deeper than terminology: It was clear that he had never considered the question of nuclear arsenal maintenance.

Yeah Jim, we’d really like to know each candidate’s position on maintenance of the nuclear arsenal. If only Jim could explain to the guy on a date with his wife why this is so important. If he only knew how meaningful this issue is, he’d surely vote for Hillary! Too bad she turned her phone off and won’t be home until morning, smelling of water based lubricant and satisfaction.

I think people want two things: a president that is genuine and credible. You’ve heard me say this before, and I firmly believe these are the only two qualities that matter in life if you want to be successful.

So is Hillary genuine and credible? She’s credible, but she sure is shit isn’t genuine. It’s something she’s had 20+ years to correct and hasn’t done it yet. There’s no amount of reintroduction that can fix this problem. Hillary 9.0 is just like Hillary 1.0. Cold, boring, humorless, ambitious beyond reason, and broken morally. The current inhabitant of 1600 Penn Ave had her pegged right when he said, ‘she’s likable enough.’ But that ain’t gonna do it. People want more than ‘enough,’ which is probably how we got Obama in the first place.

Is Trump genuine or credible? I think he’s genuine, almost to a fault. It’s his sword and shield–sometimes to his great detriment. Credible seems to be a jump ball. I’m sure there are a lot of people that just can’t quite picture him as president yet. The upside is that he can still make the sale. It’s an open ended question that hasn’t quite been defined even though Hillary has been working on this since the summer (but remember, she’s not credible so she doesn’t get to define anything).

All Trump has to do is look credible. That’s it–a pretty low bar.

If you’re not up on our bet, the loser formerly known as Hotspur and I are engaged in a little wager; if Trump wins, he comes to Charlotte for a visit. If Hillary wins I fly up to Ann Arbor to hang out at the ghetto bar. Either way, it’ll be good to see my old friend, shake his hand, and tuck into  a nice hot plate of fish sticks. And that’s the only truth that matters ;)

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