Saturday H2 Updates

Let’s see what some hostages are up to this weekend:

Pupster got a new camera, tripod, and a grant from an undisclosed German firm for a new photo series.

Vmax is experimenting with alcohol-fueled time travel.

Mare has been going all Keyser Soze on the internets.

PJM has been granted permission to work from home.

MJ is on vacation.

CaRiN has some famous customers at her bar.

Dan was transferred to produce.

Mrs. Buffalone asks for more stuffing and basting. Gets it.

So, what are you up to today?  Please respond pictorially.

ビッグブーブ金曜日 Biggubūbu kin’yōbi

Bonjour you cheese eating surrender monkeys, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

Your model for today was born in Tokyo, Japan on 8/30/1993, and she is 5’3″ tall, 38-25-36. Please stop basting the turkey long enough to welcome, Miss Mio Takaba!

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Big Food Thursday

Hello fowl cavity stuffers, and welcome to Big Food Thursday.

I hope everybody gets to their destinations safely and has a nice dinner with little to no looting and burning.  The Buffalones will be spending a quiet day at home grazing on the bounty of this land and feeling thankful for all of our blessings.

So, don’t forget to mix in some fiber-rich vegetables with your meal to make tomorrow a little smoother.

Check in when you can and let us know how many indians.

Limey Bastards and Shillelaghs

As most of you know, I’m descended from a long line of limey pricks. Sure, it gives me a sense superiority, but not many people talk about the dark side of that sense of entitlement.

You see, England is close to Ireland, and the Irish have experienced some oppression and discrimination, so I also feel oppressed, if only by way of proximity. Close enough.

Way back in the 1840s there was a potato famine. The Irish (drunk, lazy, child popping bastards) who really liked french fries and tater tots, suddenly didn’t have enough to eat. Many of them got on boats, shoulder to shoulder, hoping to find a better life in America (fuck yeah).

As they arrived in New York, before they started filming Gangs of New York, they suffered a bit of discrimination from the local population. Turns out the snobs in NYC didn’t really like my sort-of-ancestors and sought to push them outside of polite society.

But even in the face of this massive discrimination, I’ll have you know that the Irish were instrumental in fighting the Civil War. If my memory serves correct, the first Union soldier killed was Crispus Attucks. I’m talking about our Civil War, not the one in merry ‘ol England. They sat that bitch out cuz…FUCK YOU CROMWELL.

So even after getting used as cannon fodder in the Civil War and fighting for rich dandies that paid $300 for a replacement, the Irish were discriminated against for decades to come. I contend that this legacy of discrimination is responsible for the disproportionate Irish crime stats, social problems, and poverty rate.

Sure, it’s been 150 years, but I can still feel the institutional discrimination now. I feel it in my bones.

In response, I call on you that are Irish, know someone who is Irish, might have some ancestors that lived near Ireland, have visited Ireland, considered visiting Ireland, have had a pint of Guinness, or have ever listened to U2, to rise up and throw off the yoke that is Irish discrimination.

Put on your Doc Marten’s and join me in a march (mostly burning and looting with free pie, pie!) to let everyone know that we won’t suffer the continued injustice of this subtle sidelining of our people.

Please bring your own gas and shillelagh so we can make our voices heard! It’ll be mostly peaceful of course.


MMM-150: It’s like an F-150, but not a truck.

Greetings, turkey basters. Welcome to the Thanksgiving week edition of MMM. I’ve got a grueling 1.5 day week to get through before my holiday begins, so let’s get motivated.

First, accessories.
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It’s not really a bad look for you MJ

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Big Boob Friday

Hello sock tuckers, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.


Your model for today is from Los Angeles, CA, and is 33 years old. She measures 5’4″ and 132lbs, 34D-25-37. Please stop stacking the empty crates upstairs and welcome Miss Yvette Martinez!

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