Monday Motivational Mumbo-Jumbo

Soooo, all summer, I had “events” to train for, and dieting just wasn’t on my mind .   But now … there is not really anything on the horizon- no big challenges, etc. No excuses.

So  I stepped on the scale and this is what I saw:

 

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I’d like to drop about 15 pounds, so today is the first day of the rest of my … bla bla bla.

Onto the “motivational” pictures.

What do we have in the “binders” today… oh, lookie here …

Fat women:

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Fat man:

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Fat Cat:

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Fat Dog:

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Fat mouse:

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Fat horse:

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Fat Patrick Star:

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I think I’ve illustrated the “fat” point pretty well. But WHAT diet to do? This one looks nice:

 

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Ten pounds in a week? Sign me up. Week and a half, and I’d be DONE.  I can’t find any information on it, so if anyone knows the ancient Chinese secret to losing 10 pounds in a week, drop me a line.

Then there is  Eat All You Want Diet , which speaks to me on a spiritual level.  You are supposed  to read your body’s cues about what you need to eat, and how much, etc. Which … I’m pretty sure is how most of us ended up in the shape we’re in.

Or perhaps the Skinny Bitch Diet?

In essence this is an extreme vegan diet that describes meat as ‘dead, rotting, decomposing flesh’. The list of forbidden foods includes all animal products (meat, poultry, fish, eggs, dairy), refined flour, sugar, honey, beer, caffeine (coffee, tea, chocolate) and any food that contains chemical additives like artificial sweeteners. “Sugar is the devil and artificial sweeteners just as bad” they state.

Sounds like FUN!

I think the worst diet that I’ve actually known people to try is the “egg diet”.  I probably rolled my eyes the last time someone told me there were going on this diet.  LOSE 24 POUNDS in 14 DAYS!!!

Awesome, right?

How does it work? Well, this is basically what you eat:

Breakfast: 2 boiled eggs and 1 citric fruit.
-Lunch: 2 slices of bread and some fruit.
-Dinner: a bowl of salad and chicken.

 

…for two weeks.  Someone try it and let me know how it goes.

I’m going to just do the boring “count macros, eat less, work-out ” thing.   Mare is encouraged to call me a fat-ass until I reach my goal-ish range.   Macrostax is the program I’m using (it’s just an app) and I’ll up my running while I can, and continue with crossfit.

 

 

Meme was Yesterday

No, we haven’t skipped Tuesday, stay tuned!

I know, you were scared. It’s ok.

I’ll give you some memes now.

HeyLoser

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BBF

Hello, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

 

 

Your model for today was born in San Francisco, California on December 7th, 1991.  She stands 5′ 7″ and measures 38 – 25 – 36 and 143 lbs.  Please check your breath and talk about Keto with Miss Laci Kay Somers!

 

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Meme-ria

Fun songs, no felines fornicating in the foyer!

BidenAndSandersReachingOut

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Shock the Monkey

 

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Don’t blame me, blame yourselves

Trolling facedouche for content …

J’ames and I often find ourselves arguing with complete idiots, and yesterday they brought forth (yet another ) article that Trump was going to step down this year.   My comment that I’ve heard it before lead to the most epic ass-showing by our resident lib. I suspect he may have forgotten to take some of his meds.

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Who watched the Oscars?   Because otherwise you missed this very touching moment.

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Lots of trans stuff in the news this week, with trans females SHOCKINGLY overpowering actual women in sports.  Who’d have thunk?  The Crossfit Open started a week ago, and they too have joined in on the madness. New rules means that only ONE male and female athlete advance from the Open. Wouldn’t it be a hoot if the woman was trans?   Meanwhile, Caitlyn …

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I have no commentary to go with this picture:

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Or this one:

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How about a little music now? I wasn’t a huge fan of this band, until I saw them in concert.

 

I’m awaiting an album from these guys – and I’m seeing them in concert in July. Can. Not. Wait.

 

These guys JUST went into the studio. Beginning has questionable lyrics, but it’s a phenomenal song. This is Johnny before he got a few face tats.

 

Ok everyone. Go forth and make today productive. Or something.

 

 

Weekend Meme

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BBF

Hello front and back holes, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

 

Your model was born in Durham, Florida on March 5th, 1995.  She stands 5’3″, 34D-22-32 and 108 lbs.  Please play along and welcome Miss Nina North.

 

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