New Year’s Rockin’ Eve


Hi Hostages! It’s that time of year again! Time to shake out all your tired old resolutions and shine them up to look brand, shiny new. What’s it going to be this year? The always reliable lose weight, polish the bullwhip collection, delurk, organize the gif file, stop cursing, get right with God, earn more money, elect a new president, stop oppressing the downtrodden? If I had a nickel for every New Year’s resolution I never kept I bet I’d be able to buy at least a can of Pringles (Resolution: Stop writing in the first person).

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Which came first, rabbits or turnips?


Star Wire

Here’s Jen Stark.  Installation artist.

b. 1983 Miami.  She attended Maryland Institute of Contemporary Art and likes to cut paper.

Region capture 42 Region capture 43

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MMM: Christmas hangover edition

As we close out 2015, if you’re anything like me (pro-tip: more than you like to admit) you’re starting the day bloated, headachy, dehydrated, and hoping work won’t suck today. I don’t have to go to my Real Job, but I’ve got a pasture full of standing water that needs some drainage dug before the horses have to walk on ice and potentially file a workman’s comp claim. I’m really hoping that doesn’t suck. Or at least doesn’t suck my boots off my feet and leave me sockfooted in the mud.

Pepe linked this the other day and I liked it.
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BBS Fundraiser

Won’t you please help? With your contribution of a squat rack, a pan of cinnamon rolls, a gratis gym membership, or an extra large wet burrito, your gift will allow Lucie Wilde to gain an ass. An ass is a fundamental part of being a porn star, and while Ms Wilde has been given the blessings of a prodigious rack, she’ll never attain the kind of fame that only comes with having both boobs and a substantial backside.

Please don’t allow Ms Wilde to become Ms Milde. Continue reading

Big Boob Saturday

Hello little elves. In honor of the little baby Jesus, we made a collective decision to move the boobs to today. The pope is very proud of us. He called last night and said, ‘cheirar meu dedo.



Today’s model has probably been featured here before, and a quick GIS reveals that she’s really into entertaining multiple gentleman callers simultaneously, with many different orifices. The pope called and said, ‘eu tambem.’ She has the deadest eyes, the weirdest cartoon face, and quite possibly the biggest hootdangers in all of the EU. Please put down your peanut brittle and give a big Vatican welcome to Lucie Wilde!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



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Merry Christmas


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Christmas Eve 2015

Santa knows what you like


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