MMM 280: Slowest work day of the year

Well, for those of us who actually work, it’ll likely be a painful crunch as we try to get things accomplished while 60% of the staff is officially out and 20% are just keeping their desks/cubicles/booths filled until they feel like they can duck out.

I had a weird dream.

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No, it didn’t look anything like that, it was about moving/replacing part of my fence that the idiotic former owners put across the property line.  Neighbor says he’s building a garage and the two things might end up too close together.  Time to build a privacy fence on that side or just sell the place.

Thick and monochrome.

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MMM 275: No more of that jive

Legs are killing me right now.  I had no time to prepare for that event, and I’m paying for it with pain and soreness from my traps (SYWM) to my calves.  I gotta go outside in a minute to feed animals and set the plant starts out, and it’s going to hurt far more than it ought to, plus I’ve still got the old mound to add to, and I’d wanted to build another nearby.  That’s going to be tough to get done this week unless I’m basically fully recovered tomorrow.  I’m a victim of peer pressure, I tell ya.

Her clothes aren’t even trying.

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Obama II: Cockfacefuckaloo

That last word seems made up but it isn’t. If you search for it on the intertitty you’ll find a wealth of information.

So Obama is back, and this time going to kick ass and use cliches, and he’s all out of cliches. The world is stuck like a deer in the headlights of a sixteen wheel suck mobile, paralyzed at his magnificence–or so the media would have you believe.

The truth, harder than a diamond, and as difficult to swallow as a giant bitter pill is that only a few people actually care; rich old liberals and black women. The rest of us are just trying to get on with our lives. The days of our lives, even.

So please, do us a favor, oh God Emperor of the Early Release Television Series, go the fuck away. Obama could build a speech generator using the words, ‘world, future, change, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, let us, hope, and destiny,’ bridged together with terrible sentence formations and almost no one would notice. Just put up a cardboard cut out and play side A of the tape called ‘Flattering Rich Crackers’ then flip it over to side B, ‘I am Black Also, and Understand You.’

Save everyone else some time, dickface. If we wanted to be talked down to or bored to death we’d use bad grammar in a blog post and wait for Hotspur to show up.

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This man, right here, the one I’m pointing to…is a DICK!!!

MMM 271: Zero Effort Edition

It’s late.  Baby was up late, and I have zero effs to give this morning.  Hopefully completing this gets me some effs so I can get all the way to effort.

Abs.

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BBF

Hello saucy wenches,  and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Your model for today is an adult film star, she was born January 5th, 1980 in Panorama City, CA.  Standing 6 feet tall, 36F-30-34 and 165lbs, please stop making fish sticks great again long enough to welcome, Miss Alison Tyler!

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BBF

Hello dog whistlers, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Our subjects today are naturally attached to a Romanian Glamour Model, born August 17th, 1989.  She towers over MJ at 5’4″, and measures 42F-28-37.  Please stop being aloof long enough to welcome, Miss Luna Amor!

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BBF

Hello head scratchers , and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Your model for today was born on December 21, 1977 in Moscow, RSFSR, USSR as Aleksandra Aleksandrovna Korchunova.  All her measurements are in cyrillic and metric, so use your imagination as you welcome, Miss Anfisa Chekhova!

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BBF

Hello milk drinkers and tiara wearers, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Your model for today was born October 24th, 1993 in Stillwater, Minnesota, Canada.  She measures 5’9″, 35-24-35.  Please stop lamenting long enough to welcome, Miss Alex Hanson!

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MMM 245:Up early with a sledgehammer

 

I’m actually writing this on Monday morning for a change, got up at 5am, planning to head out to the barn in the cold and 1) check for trapped varmints and dos) do some “mace training” exercises with my new sledgehammers.  WTF is that?

Also, this is stuck in my head:

You’re welcome.

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