Cockfacefuckaloo | Checking Your Mom's Drawers for Hope&Change since March 2009

The List

Ok, so recently I was strongly encouraged to attend a struggle session at work, and it couldn’t have been more cringe. Think of that time Hotspur got caught in women’s underwear for the first time in the Macy’s dressing room. Take that, square it, add a cheese bag, and divide by the number of hot dogs Jay ate for breakfast.

Maximum cringe.

One of my favorite things that terrible public speakers all seem to do, is say that they want participation, discussion, disagreement, and debate. From there they generally talk for 20 minutes without taking a breath.

In that first 20 mins I learned a few things:

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May 6, 2021
Categories: !RALGNAB, # Hashtag, #Championshiplevelboobs, Beer, Beer Tree Farm, Citrus Ursine Weiner Beverage, Cockfacefuckaloo, Foreignotica, foreskin, Fourth Grade, FPOS, Fuck golf, H2 Eulogy, H2 Pets, H2 Wedding, Hai Karate, Hambone, Phone blogging, Pinch A Loaf, playing Hide the Salmon, Sherwin Fucking Williams, shit squirters, shitballs, Steamed Lobster, Stetson, Where's Cyn?, Where's MJ?, Where's Thor?, Your mom likes this . . Author: MJ (k/k-style) . Comments: 115 Comments

Sidewalk Chalk

I boughted this album from a far away place called Germanyland!

Well window lickers it’s time for summer. Down here in the SOUTH (filled with racists, you are issued a hood at the Georgia border) the weather is getting a bit warmer and we are bidding adieu to old man winterspring. Notice how I worked in a reference to de Fuhrer PBUH by using German in that last sentence? That’s how racist we are down here. We speak German, hate cold weather, and are super friendly. I literally have no idea what any of this means. I’m just typing whatever pops into my grey mush.

So, it’s time for sidewalk chalk! A time honored tradition where people go outside with their kids, pretend to hear the phone ring, go back inside to make a drink, then go back outside in about 15 or 20 minutes to make sure the kiddos are still in one piece. While most kids fit more into the impressionist or modern art category, I think I’ve found some rather clever uses of sidewalk chalk for us to enjoy. These fun little pieces of temporary art all use the cracks to make something fun and whimsical.