Good day, miscreants. I was just thinking to myself, ‘MJ, you know what this shithole dump needs? Boobs, and lots of them.’ Good thing it’s Friday, my groovy tuckers. You’re in luck.
*
But first things second. I wrote this song whilst Eddie Vetter and I were taking our pitbulls for a walk through a loverly Seattle park. We saw a pack of wild hippies and our snarling, wild beasts were hungry. I looked at him and said, ‘drop the leash my good man, your pooch looks absolutely famished!.’ And he did. Fin.
*
*
Today’s model was a subject of great debate this morning. GND says that this chick isn’t fat, but that she’s a little hippy. I think she’s a big girl, with big girl features. Anyhoo, her god given, not made up name is Carlotta Champagne. She stands 5’6″ and graduated from the same college as GND. No shit, I’m not kidding. Please stop sacrificing virgins at your Scott Walker altar long enough to welcome….a fat chick.
*
Fuck the test.
*
*
*
*
*
*
Ya’ll have a nice weekend. I’m in FL sick as a dog, but at least it’s not snowing.
273 Comments
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I win the internet!
Boing
Yay, tits!
Leon, your diagraming of sexual response is not helping:
http://tinyurl.com/kqen44r
Not fat. Not by a long shot.
GND is a genius and I’d like to subscribe to her “newsletter”.
Are GND your girlfriends initials or something else?
I would not call this girl fat.
GND stands for “Girl Next Door”
Oh, thank you Colorado Alex.
GND is obviously too smart for you MJ.
Someone should tell her.
The gif for “you’re in luck” was excellent.
Hmm, Champagne; sounds nice.
HAHAHAH…
https://thehostages.wordpress.com/?attachment_id=43402
Nice job on the bewbs,
MJGND.http://i.imgur.com/ZapULFH.jpg
GND is a blast!
Meh, she’s ok.
She looks nice
but you can’t trust MJ
She is probably a he
GND is stellar whatever MJ says
Can one of you briefly tell me what happened with Net Neutrality?
Actually, legislatively happened? I don’t get it? Did they vote? How can you possible vote on something that has not been seen? No one has seen the fricken bill.
So these are just rules by the FCC? I thought the head of the FCC thought net neutrality was a mess?
On another note, Eric Holder is a c*nt.
3-2 vote of the FCC. Just like the EPA, we have no say in what they decide.
Holy crap, it’s snowing here. Mr. TiFW tried to drive to the store and couldn’t even make it out of the neighborhood. Rebecca may end up stuck at school….
I’ll just leave this here for everyone.
http://is.gd/FsOV3F
Roads are so icy, they are closing major arterials in ABQ. Work is going to be a pain in the ass. All the cashiers with kids will stay home and all the assholes with asshole kids will be out shopping once the roads clear. I H8 snow days.
heh, all my ads at Ace’s are for prom dresses.
3-2 vote of the FCC. Just like the EPA, we have no say in what they decide.
——
Friggen bullshit.
It’s a hot.mess mare but I am now officially over partisan bullshit and I don’t believe anyone’s bitching anymore. If conservatives are all that then zip it and rip it. Take over some demographics from the commie party, organize some party planks that energize stupid people under 30 that could give two shits about politics AND burn the GoP to the wire harness and start over.
Scoreboard. Look at it.
We look like a bunch of pussys.
Ps. This is chumpo. I’m commenting from a little black calculator thing I found in my kids toybox. It’s called a Amazonian Tinder or something. I’m not going to try to make it log on because I would stroke out.
I’m with you, Chumpo.
What should I have for lunch?
GND
GND?
Fishsticks!!!
No worries, Mare. All the liberals on facedouch tell me that the only reason I oppose Net Neutrality is because I’m stupid and a sheep and a few other not-so-nice words. It’s going to be GREAT because … NETFLICKS!
Have you heard about that dress and the colors?
I had a tuna melt.
Rush was right, if you are bitching about Netflicks being $9-12 bucks a month you’re a dipshit.
Classic case of giving up freedoms for well, nothing.
That netflicks argument is so stupid. Now if they were talking about selling cable packages by individual channels I might actually listen.
I had a late breakfast of 2 eggs, slice of provolone with bacon on an English muffin made at home. All it cost was a promise to do the dishes.
I try to stay out of the talk and just crack wise but, lately I’ve just had it. I believe that Americans can bring it like nobody else and the kicker is that everyone else in the world knows it too. One day this little socialist mini redux will pass. We are right now like the hot chick in high school who got mad at her parents and chopped her hair and dyed it black and started slumming with the wrong crowd just to be a problem. I don’t believe for one second that The Union is on the rocks and I’m fucking SICK of hearing shot like “it was a fine Republic while it lasted and all that whiney looser pap. If I was 20 stupid and looking at the choices I had for political mentors or whatever I sure as well wouldn’t want anything to do with a bunch of depressed people who constAntly cry becAuse they perceive the so called fourth estate as totally in the bag for the enemy etc. That attitude isn’t attractive to anybody and a real conservitivemovment would be able to move through any obstacle by force of message.
I don’t claim to have any great answers today becAuse I’m just a gentle woodsman. I am also announced advertising professional and the messaging that we as a political body is “don’t buy our brand because we can’t stop crying about how we keep.getting our asses KICKED.
When the message changes the victories will come. Just like always.
Sorry to be all up about it this morning.
Ah love you weirdos and I could care less about your politics. I come here for the funah.
Happy fried egg.
I’ve decided on fish sticks.
Gross
Eric Holder blames racism for his troubles.
When he first got the nomination it didn’t even occur to me that he is black. It wasn’t until I read a few stories about him that I learned it. Same is true of Rahm Emanuel and his shithead brother Ezekiel.
These fucks USE race.
Fuck ’em. I hate them because they are crooks and assholes, not because they are mulattoes using their black half to their advantage. I hate their white halves just as much.
Yeah, I said mulattoes.
AMERICANS, Chumpo. TFG has filled our country with anti-Americans that do not assimilate and only want free-shit. 2014 proved that our votes don’t matter and that Beltway Brunches triumphs over We The People. The Founding Fathers told us what would happen to our Republic if we did this. I was never a Debbie Downer about America. I even had hope for a few weeks after the 2014 election that we were taking our country back.
MJ, what are you, some kind of gay fish?
Preach it Brother Chumpo. Amen to what you said.
Um no. Why, what have you heard?
fish sticks
http://tinyurl.com/l4nhqed
I’m just a gentle woodsman.
—–
http://tinyurl.com/nbdb62k
Im in a meeting, reading the hostages, HA!
I didn’t know Cock Holder was a mulettas either. The race card assholes are suffering from the same messaging problems. It’s obnoxious and turns people off. No wonder this country suffers from anemic voter turnout. Modern politics is a depressing rehash of perceived injustice and failures.
You know who likes fish stick?
Your mom.
Chumps should be President.
Listen Ositta. I share your disappointment. I want to see political change for good in my lifetime as do so many people who don’t even know how to begin the process of understanding political discourse.
I believe that Many many folks are natural conservatives and if there was a consistent message that was built on a 7 to.10 year plan that stipulated how government would come to respect people’s time on Earth and get out of their way then you would see more people empowered by that message and there would be much less chicanery.
I really believe in Aces Project Decimation. I know you do as well.
Burn it down. Build it back.
MFM reaction to Walker’s Speech has me in full LiFB mode. Dan is a LIV. He watches GMA and Today. “Walker compares union members to ISIS”. That’s it. None of his positive speech. Rest was all about the dress and llamas. Net neutrality will limit the ability to get the message out. CoAlex has great ideas about the conservative message.
MJ doesn’t have a gentleman’s sausage. It’s really more of a fish stick. Or so I’ve been told.
*cough*
WTF is the dress deal?
Mare, you don’t want to know. It’s the stupidest thing since pet rocks.
People are stupid.
CoLex is a very bright fellow. I’d be game for a messaging salon (:)) anytime.
There are a lot of dumb people out there, like it or not:
http://tinyurl.com/lqaznmu
RIP, Leonard Nimoy
I’m just a gentle woodsman.
I thought chumpo was a bus driver?
As kids we spent hours trying to get the Vulcan Death Grip to work.
Live long and prosper.
I wear many hats. My favorite is the one with the can holders and the long straw.
Thanks to all for putting me some knowledge ‘re Kahn Acadamy. My path is a bit less rocky because of you.
My dad loved Mr Spok. Now they’re up there together, so that’s cool.
As kids we spent hours trying to get the Vulcan Death Grip to work.
/hairy palms
This may be TOO inside Detroit baseball, but Geoffry Feiger got denied admission into DAC.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
that just kills me.
My family were old time members of the DAC. My great grandfather was a member, and the family got grandfathered in from there – my great grandpa was a steel tycoon.
Anyway, the place is very conservative, old school, right in the heart of Detroit.
Haha Chumpo! So true…
http://www.detroitnews.com/story/opinion/columnists/laura-berman/2015/02/27/detroit-athletic-club-leaves-fieger-cold/24094329/
After his name was posted online and in the club as one of 26 prospective new resident members, Fieger’s DAC friends say, the club’s board of directors received several letters opposing his membership. He says he heard “there were at least 20 letters” opposing him.
The club’s congenial general manager, Ted Gillary, declined to comment about “club business.”
Two weeks ago, one of Fieger’s sponsors, Art Van Elslander, the furniture magnate, told Fieger that he’d been asked by a club official to withdraw Fieger’s name and — barring that — to ask Fieger to withdraw, Fieger says. Through Diane Charles, an ArtVan spokeswoman, Van Elslander confirmed the club’s decision to bar Fieger from joining.
Asshole is as asshole does.
Looks like my mom will be coming home from the hospital this afternoon. Thank you all again for all your prayers and happy thoughts.
For a bunch of degenerate scumbags, you guys really are the best.
Hahaha That is great, Car in.
Well, I do like Chumpo’s take on things, but it’s very hard to fight city hall when it’s completely corrupt. See:Recent tapes of Lois Lerner’s emails.
This should be front page of every paper and lead on every news cast. This is corruption at it’s worst (besides of course the deaths in Benghazi and Fast and Furious).
Hard to consider our Democratic Republic functioning when it’s completely corrupted.
Oh, and Fuck Boehner and McConnell.
Yay for Seanmom!
Good news, Sean.
Oh, and Fuck Boehner and McConnell.
Not with your dick.
Yea Sean’s mom! Everyone should give her a rest this weekend.
I gar-en-damn-t-you mine is bigger than theirs.
See:Recent tapes of Lois Lerner’s emails.
You’re not nearly cynical enough, Mare.
The reason they’re part of a criminal investigation is to run out the clock.
Congress wants to see the emails? Sorry, they’re evidence. Can’t compromise the investigation!
But sometime after November 2016, and before January 2017, the investigation (which will have done nothing) will quietly fold its tend and no charges will be brought.
With a little luck, they’ll manage to lose the tapes in the interim.
Comment by chumpo on February 27, 2015 11:44 am
*holds lighter up above head*
*sprinkler alarm*
for car n
http://tinyurl.com/p7rq2xv
Either the IRS Inspector General and Deputy are in on it or not. The news today, looks to me anyway, is that they are not.
A criminal probe prosecuted by the current “justice” department is worthless, I agree.
I hope you are wrong Xbrad, but I also hope that a new administration and AG Giuliani will get sore feet from all the frog-marching of former IRS, NSA, State, EPA, etc. ex-officials.
A guy can dream.
XB, that is what is so frustrating with Issa, and Gowdy, and so on. If it was Scooter Libby it would be 24/7 MFM coverage. There was nothing there. It was BS from Day 1. F&F, Benghazi, IRS, Black Panthers, etc are all worse than Watergate and there isn’t a single journalist or politician with integrity to call out ValJar, TFG, Shrill, or Holder.
I even had hope for a few weeks after the 2014 election that we were taking our country back.
Funny how such a corrupt administration allows the masks to slip on everybody. The GOP ran on stopping obama and once in *crickets*.
They are too comfortable in the club and f*ck all of you domestic terrorists.
Anyway, the place is very conservative, old school, right in the heart of Detroit.
Maybe because he’s a jew?
This should be front page of every paper and lead on every news cast.
Once Breitbart died, his message of the media being the problem and exposing them sort of went away.
The entire gov is corrupt and it’s a feeding frenzy in the shark tank because they know there is noone that will hold them to account.
Bush couldn’t take a step without Reid and Pelosi’s ugly mugs finding cameras and pushing the ‘culture of corruption’. Where is McConnell and Boner’s mugs but in their martini glasses?
Instead we have McCain and Miss Lindsay, my friends and hobbits.
But hey how about that Hillary, defender of women, rape victims, and savior of muslims from offensive videos? Surely she will bring ISIS to it’s knees with all the millions her foundation took from their sponsors, right?
For a bunch of degenerate scumbags, you guys really are the best.
The best degenerate scumbags?
Maybe because he’s a jew?
I think it’s because he’s an asshole.
You want to become depressed about our now infinitely regulated intertubes? Then listen to this. Mmmpph. Erg.
http://www.redstate.com/2015/02/27/title-ii-internet/
Sorry Chumpo for being what you described. With millions of voters coming from S. America and Mexico and shitbags like Hillary on the horizon with the Pravda media holding her hand, and Obama’s BFF, Boehner and McConnell….I’m not feeling too positive about much.
Young people don’t seem to pay much attention. My kids marginally pay attention, at best. The daughter showed a smidge of interest – sorta – because the guy she’s dating pays attention.
https://scontent-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/10312465_1166885833334474_3640622512313426868_n.jpg?oh=9f2d024f24367a84119e24411b71f98c&oe=55871E53
Don’t be beasn
Gentle as the tide.
I gotta go to the bank and buy more influence so that I can buy us a newspaper. They.cost about $40 right?
She is most definitely not “too fat”…
Header pic is disturbing to me.
What’s a clitoris?
Mr. TiFW left 90 minutes ago to go get Rebecca from school (they’re closing early due to the weather).
He still hasn’t made it to the school – traffic is f’ed up all over the Metroplex.
He might get back home before dark….
Thankfully, Rebecca is currently safe, warm, and dry at her school; they’re staying until all of the kids are picked up.
They may end up having a sleepover at this rate!
Get one of Tom Hill’s buddies to front you some cash.
Also, today’s model delightful and perfectly proportioned.
I believe the phrase I’d use is “built for comfort”.
One last thing while I’m owning the comments: Girl.
NFW
watched The Odd Couple last night.
Oh my dear Lord. It was actually painful to sit through. Matthew Perry actually looks angry that he’s speaking the lines they gave him.
Just horrendous.
THX, Wiser. Too bad there is nothing funny about TFG. No way to satirize him. He’s just too nuanced and smart for us/s I was wrong about who would be braving the icy streets. Not just assholes and their asshole kids, but asshole grandparents as well.
”watched The Odd Couple last night.
Oscar is Chandler Bing.
Perry is Chandler in everything he does.
Somebody better give Ace a cigarette.
Perry is Chandler in everything he does.
Not in this. As Chandler, he was funny and irreverent. As Oscar, he was just obnoxious and angry. And not funny in the least.
I really cannot imagine how someone heard this pitch and said “awesome!”
Perry created the show too.
Perry created the show too.
Maybe he’s snorted all the millions he made from Friends and he’s now desperate for cash?
Honestly, if he is one of the show’s creators, one would think he would try harder on the show.
You really need to watch an episode before it gets canceled. Which I’m guessing will be before the end of March.
Somebody better give Ace a cigarette.
at this point, I think we just bump the nic in his gum up to about SevenHundredEleventy for a lil’bit.
Angry Ace is great blogger Ace.
From one of the reviews of The Odd Couple…
” If it was a horse, it would be in the back of a semi on the way to the dog food factory. If it was a patient, the plug would be pulled. If this show was a convict on death row, even opponents of the death penalty would be lined up to flip the switch.”
Congrats, Leon!
Awww, that’s great, Leon.
Oh. OH. I thought Leon was just defending the BBF girl’s gender.
YAY! Congratulations Carutherses!
What is great?
Come here, SRG
http://tinyurl.com/nc7ofra
Leon is having a girl. Well, his wife is…
Are you sure?
because I’m a giver:
http://www.tvfanatic.com/shows/the-odd-couple/full-episodes/
Thanks, I’ll share her name after we’ve met.
No, but that’s what we extrapolated out of this comment:
Comment by leoncaruthers on February 27, 2015 2:55 pm
One last thing while I’m owning the comments: Girl.
Well, now I’m sure.
Kids kick ass (in a good way), Leon. I’m very, very happy for you.
You should let us name her, Leon.
Why is Wiser being mean to us?
heh heh heh
“The Odd Couple” has the benefit of the extremely cushy time slot following “The Big Bang Theory.” That’s CBS’s target demographic: People who can’t be bothered to find the remote.
oh. poor leon…..
sorry, brother…..
Oh. OH. I thought Leon was just defending the BBF girl’s gender.
Exactly, Me too!
That’s wonderful news, Leon!
I’ll start shopping right now for her uniform on her first visit to Auntie Cyn’s School for Kickass Girls.
It could have been tucking.
It’s supposedly 100% with an ultrasound at 20 weeks, extremely unlikely it’s a boy hiding his bits. It would have been obvious if it were a son. I was watching the whole time and it certainly looked like girl parts. There may still be a surprise, but we’re going to start taking the little girl hand-me-downs from my neice.
And I have to start practicing my “I know what you’re thinking, twerp, I have a shotgun, a shovel, and acres of woods memorized” speech. I’m going to need it in a few years.
That’s what I thought it was.
leonette
Nice.
If Leon’s wife gives birth to a boy, the “tucker” jokes will be endless…
Woo hoo. Pellets are in!
Are you sure?
Hahahahah!
If Leon’s wife gives birth to a boy, the “tucker” jokes will be endless…
I’m not sure if that’s better or worse than…
oh. poor leon…..
sorry, brother…..
Either it’s a boy who was hiding the twig and berries (who we’ll have to name Tucker), or it’s a girl, and I’m going to be staring down little boys and worse who wish to defile her from 2020 to 2045 or so.
Just looking at those dates scares me.
You should let us name her, Leon.
Ah. Haha hahaha. Hahahahahhhaaaahhhaa.
No.
Glenda Carruthers.
Leona would be nice. After Leona Helmsley. She seemed nice.
“Miracle” is a nice girls name.
Mabel Caruthers
It also sets a certain tone.
Congratulations, Leon. You are blessed.
Mrs. Random went to school with triplets…Faith, Hope, and Charity.
True story.
Gwyneth Caruthers
Sizzilean Janet Caruthers
She’s lean and mean.
Names Mrs. Caruthers shot down that I liked:
Persephone
Oleysia
Margaret
Faustina
Mabel
LaWiser Caruthers
(seriously, congrats. Little girls are the best. Until they become teenaged girls.)
I already have a 2nd cousin (just born) named Genevieve, so that’s gone too.
Mary Ann Caruthers or Ginger Caruthers
I have a cousin Mary and an Aunt Mary. Mary is not on the list.
And Ginger is a stripper name.
La-a Caruthers.
Don’t make it a stripper name.
OrangeJelly Caruthers
Pronounced “o-RON-gel-ee”
Neveah is a new common one.
“It’s heaven backwards”
Ssabmud
Mooki
I actually like the names Diana or Elizabeth
Me: Leon’s having a girl!
Penelope: Poor bastard…………
We do have one chosen, but I almost convinced her on Persephone.
Whatever you name her, remember to give a fucked up hooked on phonix spelling.
Typhani
lots of ‘i’s so she can make hearts over them.
And may I just mention here that I find you to be a reprehensible human being for enforcing your cis-normative, patriarchal definition of gender on your unborn child.
h8er.
I also hope that in the years to come she will be a devoted wife and mother to a good, deserving man and grandchildren whom I can treasure in my old age.
Because I’m a complete and total asshole.
Fiona
Typhani
**golf clap**
Jimbro, one of the bridesmaids from our wedding has a daughter named Fiona.
Noel
Think about it….
Fiona
Only if she’s one-eyed.
Crackfat is over. 2000 lbs of pellets neatly stacked in the garage.
That will make it a 7 ton winter. Our first year with the stove was 4 tons.
Oh, FFS:
http://www.wwtdd.com/2015/02/eddie-redmayne-nails-down-next-oscar/
6 ton.
Local news got a quote from the leader of this club on Nimoy’s passing:
https://usskatahdin.wordpress.com/
Tyshachondraniequa-anshit is one of my favorites. My girls were already born before I invented it though. I’ve never been able to talk anybody else into using it.
If I’d had a son the plan was to name him Richard Socrates. We’d call him DickSock for short.
Has to be a relative, Jimbro.
Leon, your journey as a man, father, husband, and caretaker of the next generation will be joyous. Those of us with daughters gain a new understanding of patience and perseverance; in a good way.
we’re an integral part of the framework – the architecture : a good father engenders a role model for life’s selections (and you are that).
Congratulations!
I thought it was cool when Spock spoke to leftists:
http://tinyurl.com/o79vnyn
My son will be named “Three-Wolf”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_8nY_LQL3w&feature=youtu.be
Tyshachondraniequa-anshit is one of my favorites.
Do you pronounce the dash?
Congratulations, Leon! (You are in such big trouble…..) 🙂
Can’t wait to meet her!
Comment by Cyn on February 27, 2015 6:27 pm
Do you pronounce the dash?
========
One of Penelope’s friends was interviewing job candidates. One applicant’s name was L-A. She asked “LA” like Los Angeles? The woman angrily replied “It’s pronounced “El DASH uh””
Greetings, people who work a regular wek with more or less regular hours.
Most likely it was, or a friend of a friend.
Good news on Your Mom, Sean!
Congrats, Leon.
Tonight’s Lenten dinner is a low-carb pizza with garlic and diced red bell pepper.
Thanks again. Glad your mom is doing okay, Sean.
Just got a call, and mom’s home. Stiff and tired from the ride back (SYWM) but she’s okay.
Putin is definitely more decisive than Obama.
None of that, “strategic patience” bullshit.
Obama uses the Justice Department, The IRS, The FCC, etc., just as effectively.
Good to hear, Sean. Stupid hips.
So I was trying to travel today and all the flights all over the world (that go through DFW) were shot down in flames.
Came home and youngest was here and she told me her E6 bf will be home in 3 weeks.
I think she did that to see if I’d sniffle.
Well I ain gonna show her that shit. Much.
name for leon to consider:
Boomquifa
Teach me your stony-faced ways, Dave.
YAY for E6BF!
I’m glad your mom made it home Sean. She already knows the rehab drill I’m guessing.
http://imgur.com/gallery/Nyo9jch
Okay, I’m not gonna scroll through the entire thread…did anybody suggest “Shirlena?” yet?
And, yes, the question mark is included in the spelling of the name.
Teach me your stony-faced ways, Dave.
Botox.
ain’t got none Leon.
absolutely none. Not when she looked in my eyes and got a little misty
http://imgur.com/gallery/erflwm1
http://is.gd/cats_with_thumbs
I’m glad to hear the Sgt. will be coming home, dave.
Weird that the thing about the planes doesn’t seem to have made the news.
DeeT, it’s good to hear that Sgt Beau is comin back.
Can we come to the wedding, Pleeeeeeeeze.
I promise we will be good and sit in the back and no fighting. I’ll bring a bunch of coloring books and pens.
C’mon. Tell me you’ll think about it.
thanks Shawn!
lets sit in the back Chumps
Anything for you, Cool Cat.
U.S.S. Katahdin is the local Star Fleet chapter by you, Jimbro. It’s the U.S.S. John B. McCay at Virginia Tech and the U.S.S. Wernher von Braun in Huntsville.
John McKay (fixt spelling) was an X-15 pilot and a graduate of Virginia Tech.
Beam me up!
I live on a mesa. 3 of the 4 ways home have been closed due to ice. It has taken us 18 minutes to go one mile.
I thought mesa moved to Texas.
Oso, I drove around a barracade today.
You can walk faster.
Dan kept wanting to pull over and walk. Sidewalks and streets are solid ice. We made it in 30 minutes. Only slid once. Roamy, were cops manning the barricades?
Fuck you ice!
The Hoppers were hoping you would pull over.
and the killer clowns.
LOL
Did anybody maliciously disregard anybody else’s nut allergies while baking cookies for the class today?
Hahaha I’ve had 3 major falls on ice. No broken bones, but stitches once. Dan treats me like an old lady when it’s icy. Maria at work knows only one way home. Dan was giving her directions on how to get home and avoid the closures. Dan to me in the car: How the fuck can you know only one way to get home? (As an ABQ native, he was telling “All the losers” an alternate way home based on the closures and where they live.)
Oso, no cops. Mini-me and I were coming down the mountain, slush, snow, and ice were everywhere the sun didn’t shine enough through the trees. I dropped it into 2nd gear and prayed no one was coming the other way. Got down the mountain, then drove around the barricade at the bottom. Fat lot of good not blocking both ends of the road.
We have cops enforcing the closed major arterials. We had no sun today. Nothing melted. Condo was 53 degrees when we got home. My stripper name dog was snuggling with Mary Ann under a faux fur blankie.
Leon, I love Faustina. Great Saint.
Sean is funny. Only store bought food is allowed in classrooms in NM. Students and teachers need access to nutritional information and allergens.
My nuts are hypoallergenic.
Jajajaja
Sean, Mesa BLUE moved to TX. I live on the West Mesa. Not to be confused with JWest.
Cyn, do you have llamas in your part of PHX?
It was snowy, or freezing fog all day here, Oso.
No to llamas but yes to ostriches.
Go figure.
I am in a winter wonderland. This is the heart of Texas…twice in 5 years. Lovely in its novelty…and my workout class is probably canceled tomorrow so I can sleep in without guilt.
Also,
http://tinyurl.com/phgxxp3
Pepe, you guys look like you were hit worse than us. Cyn, doesn’t Chandler have some weird ostrich race? Mare, we have a Planet Fitness by our condo. Couldn’t tell if people were exercising or if they abandoned their cars in the parking lot.
Yep–Chandler isn’t far from me.
I’ve never been though. I should fix that.
Back in the day when we could afford Spring Training, we would stay in Chandler.
Cops were enforcing curfew Wednesday night.
Cyn, do you have llamas in your part of PHX?
http://is.gd/82xtCo
We have few plows and salt trucks. Sheesh. Common sense. I’m getting tired of people bitching about their fucking cul de sac not being plowed or salted.
not being plowed or salted.
FUCK SALT!
GO, have you talked to your inlaws? Nortenos are excited about ski conditions.
My cul de sac hasn’t been plowed or salted all winter, dammit!
They’re no longer big skiers. But we’ll talk to them this weekend. SIL is visiting. I want to visit to play with their golden retriever. We still haven’t pulled the trigger on a pet ourselves.
Yesterday, all our trucks from WY were delayed. Today, trucks are here, but local associates are having a hard time making it to work. At least Bentonville is way more understanding than Minneapolis.
BTW, I don’t mean “shooting a pet.” Because with someone like me, I may be misunderstood.
I’m trying to think of a less effective commercial than the one with Matthew McConnaghey talking to himself inside a Lincoln.
They’re no longer big skiers.
Moved out of Montana, did they?
I’m trying to think of a less effective commercial than the one with Matthew McConnaghey talking to himself inside a Lincoln.
Those annoying fucking “truth” antismoking ads come to mind.
I actually want to light up a cigar after I see one.
They’re no longer big skiers.
—-
Moved out of Montana, did they?
What I mean is they returned the Paul Bunyan telemarks to the rental shop.
Blah blah Spock quit smoking 30 years ago. How did he die of COPD? Wah wah wah.
Spock quit smoking Kirk 30 years ago.
OMG Listening to vehicles trying to make it up the incline to get out of the condos. FFS stay home! Dan: Why don’t you try to go the other way, you dumb fuck. Smells like burning rubber. Dumb ass.
Why was Riley staring at you today, Mr. Bont?
I actually want to light up a cigar after I see one.
http://youtu.be/dwsDNeKqVHQ
Mentos
the fresh maker
http://tinyurl.com/jw8q3ty
On any given day, it’s a safe bet that it was related to when he’s getting his lunch, Eric.
“Now?”
“Now?”
“FUCKING NOW, HUMAN??!!”
At least he’s not feline. You know the saying: dogs have masters, cats have staff.
This is true. But if you do “pull the trigger” on a dog, so to speak, get used to the idea that they’re better at telling time than you are.
Has anyone discovered how to change a dog’s clock for daylight savings time?
I have cat/dogs.
GO, move to AZ.
Well played, oso.
http://tinyurl.com/kq3auzl
Billy Dee Williams instead of Citizen Kane?
*awards bonus points for novelty*
I’m kinda brown. I get the Billy Dee instead. Wee bit rayciss, but at least it isn’t an Apple emoji rayciss.
Billy Dee is colorblind. He claps for anyone who’s schmoooove.
Hahaha Billy Dee is DiT?
G’night. We’re scheduled at 9. Roads should still be icy then. We’re planning on working once it is safe to go to work.
Sorry I tried to spit roast your mom.
-Sterling Archer.
What’s the difference between Apollo 11 and your mom?
After men visited the moon it turned out they weren’t infected.
What’s the difference between your mom and the moon?
Only twelve men have ever been on the moon.
Animals they derp and adore you
Intuitions flash before you
Born to kiss the lion soul face
His happiness the throne of your grace