Puns are like paper, they’re terrible.

This song just jumped into the lead for “H2 Blog Theme Song”

Happy Valen-meme’s Day!

Happy Valentines Day!

This is life in Iowa, Dec-Apr.

Auld Lang Meme

Oh you knew the song already?

New Tuesday thing. Pun of the day. I have to share all the puns from Punderdome, given to me by a very thoughtful Hostage.

Why were two kids fighting at the prom? (answer later!)

Ode To The Ham Sandwich

As we have often heard and most people know (mainly from the TV genre known as “police procedurals“), a grand jury will indict a ham sandwich. Fewer people know WTH a grand jury is much less what indict means. Where we all can find common ground is in the ham sandwich. Let’s meet the players

Shout out to Lithuanian Dark Rye Bread! Zajabis!

Thorsday Substitute Poat

Since Jimbro is off in the mountains receiving a heavy load from some shady contractor, I’ve agreed to put up a poat.  The old one was smelling worse than your mom after Fleet Week.  We haven’t had a rip-roaring, honest-to-God hurt feelings fight on this blog in far too long, so let’s talk about music.

So, I’m about two weeks out from leaving my job, and by the time you read this I will hopefully have an offer for a new job outside of California.  Even if I don’t, I’m still leaving this state.  And that means one thing… ROADTRIP!  For the past nine months I’ve driven 45-75 minutes each way up to Santa Barbara each day for work.  Obviously, spending that much time on the road means listening to the radio a lot.  Thank the gods for Pandora, and Youtube on my phone.  So I thought I’d put together a list of some of my favorite songs to listen to while driving.  I decided to limit it to ten songs, about what I used to burn on a CD before a long road-trip.  Obviously there are others, but if I had to pick ten to listen to for a couple of hours in parts of the country where the only radio stations are messican polka and the baptist station... the mixture below would be my top choice. Yeah, some of them are covers, but they’re better than the originals for keeping me awake and focused while on the road.

BBF

Hello two for ones, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

 

 

Your model for today was floated by Jimbro, she is a talented pianist and composer, born July 3rd, 1985 in Tashkent, Uzbekistan. Please slow your roll and say hello to Miss Lola Astanova!

 

Emergency Thursday Poat

Since the usual suspects were not available, I’ll go ahead and put up a poat that’s fresher than your mom after fleet week.  Content will be minimal, a sampler of themes from the rest of the week.

We’ve got well-formed glutes and poorly-tucked penii. *check*

How about some hard-bodied pretty-boys? *check*

Bore, God of Blunder? *Check* and *Check*

And titties and a vacant stare. *Check*  I’m not sure if she’s been featured before, and I’m too lazy to ask.

Who Dat? Not My Preznit!

As I’m sure you are all aware president Obama is set to make his big comeback to the US and public life after pretending to write his memoirs on a mega yacht with Oprah and Tom Hanks (WILSON!!!!!!!). Here’s an excerpt of his first draft that will be later turned into dramatic prose by a little known college professor and spontaneous combustion enthusiast. 

Chapter 1

Barack’s version: Sat down to watch a rerun of SportCenter at 11 after calling SlowJoe and a quick workout with Mooch. Fell asleep. Woke up during the nooner of SC just in time to see Venus Williams winning some white shit tourney for the third time. Man, what an ass. I’d like to put a Mike Tyson mask on her and lay into them hindquarters. Trump sucks! San Demus High School rules!

Ayers version: Five Nine score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of captivity.

Speaking of C**ts

So funny I bust my felt wiiiiiiddddeee open.

Upon Which We Proclaim Our Joy for The C**t’s Demise

 

****************************************************************************************************

*

Added, cuz it’s freakin hilarious!