Crackers in my bed everyone of ’em could eat.
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Crackers in my bed everyone of ’em could eat.
July 9, 2014
Categories: As Little as Possible, Balls, Heavy Metal Thunder, Le Luc Long, new post, Sodium Chloride Fornication, Things that really matter, TITS, Vaseline Kiss, Your mom likes this . . Author: Cyn, Widgets Fixerer
155 Comments
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March 3, 2021
Our government is a giant shitball of incompetents, liars and fascist pricks.
Repost.:
Comment by Jimbro on July 9, 2014 6:12 am
Up early for work, nice and quiet at the lake. Coffee in one hand, dog getting scratched behind the ears with the other (but Jim, what are you typing with?), life is grand.
Repost sounds like rapist.
Heh, Slacker Radio sent me this email:
“Join hosts Craig Marks and Rob Tannenbaum as they count down the 101 Greatest Cover Songs of all time – a one-of-a-kind station you’ll only hear on Slacker Radio!”
Not going there.
Heh.
Not a real talkative bunch the last few days, are ya?
Oh wait, H4?
I KNEW IT!
I’ve been busy. I have some guests coming this weekend. I have to hide the bodies, paint over the bloodstains.
You know the routine.
I’m listening to Best of Kansas in the office now, a bit loud before patients arrive. We watched the show Supernatural on Netflix and they use Kansas often in the soundtrack. I feel like I’m hunting demons with Sam and Dean Winchester.
Wakey wakey.
As for the the Outlander books, the first was awesome. The second was pretty good, as you really wanted to know more of the story, etc. The third was boring, and I don’t think I made it through the fourth. All the criticisms were correct – I could have cared less about the daughter, yada yada yada.
Good morning cool kids
I think I need to take some time away from coffee. I can’t lift until my shoulder tendonitis is healed, and without that I have a really hard time getting to sleep at night.
*cries at the thought of no coffee
*kisses coffee mug
Maybe it’s time you did some sprint training, Leon? i have tendonitiis in my elbow so I’m avoiding lifts that aggravate it. Of course, the whole LIFTING GIANT TRAYS OF FOOD doesn’t help.
I just can’t take off working out. I’d have to choke a bitch.
Morning, children.
I’m planning to do some backpack-weighted walks this week, but the sleep disruption has made my preferred time (early morning) difficult.
Do you like tea?
I’m drinking brewed cocoa right now, tea later.
Comment by leoncaruthers on July 9, 2014 8:50 am
I’m drinking brewed cocoa right now, tea later.
===============
Livin’ La Vida Loca…………..
http://is.gd/ccXvBW
La vida loca estĂ¡ sobrevalorada.
Killed it?
Lo muertĂ³.
Usted dice
All this spanish is making me hungry. Taco Cabana or Twisters for breakfast? Hmmm
Twistys whaaa?
We had dinner in a seafood place last night. They have a board by the front desk with the specials listed on it and I spotted an appetizer that I wanted to try, blackened shrimp quesadilla.
The waiter came over and did his routine, but didn’t tell us about the appetizer special.
Why didn’t you tell us about the blackened shrimp quesadilla?
He says, “I don’t like spicy food.”
That man should be unemployed.
Ha ha, I hope you tipped him well for that ignorant hilarity
Dinner took forever, mostly because he spent the entire time in the kitchen watching the soccer game.
We tipped him anyway, because Car in.
Car in didn’t serve you or you would have known about the appetizer and she wouldn’t be watching the foosball match. I fail to see the parallel.
OTOH, I’d probably just have gone down to the bare 15% if it had been me. Lord knows I have off days at my job and they still pay me the same.
Yep on the bad/off days. Always depends on the overall attitude.
Oh Puppstah!
Whoa, what’s up with first dude’s eyes?
Hunh, I didn’t even notice that. Seems like he’s looking at both of us at the same time… hawt, amirite?!
I looked like that when one of my eyes was swollen from pollen.
Hahahahaha
Reading Scott’s comment reminds me of the time when one of HotBride’s employees was asked what he recommended from the menu, His reply was, “Well, I can’t afford to eat here, so I don’t really know.”
That’s actually a good argument for adding “free meal for you and one guest” for every so-many-hours worked to an employee’s compensation package. Not redeemable for anything else.
If you don’t want to eat here, I don’t want you working here. If you never eat here, you won’t know if it’s worth it to customers.
Employee meals were half off. He was just a fucking loser who lasted about two weeks.
Mrs. Jay hates seafood. But when she got a job as a server at Red Lobster, they had to try everything on the menu. She still hated seafood, but they at least try to put some knowledge and experience to their employees.
We only get half off on the cheap stuff , which is stupid . Half off covers cost, even for the $$ stuff. So I refuse to pay, and eat all mistakes completely guilt free .
I started in the kitchen before being a busboy. I knew where the jumbo shrimp were in the walk in fridge. The pizza cooks and junior chefs were quick to pass you part of what they were making for themselves too. In short, eating at work was not a problem.
Ooops, I burned that. Can’t sell that! Guess we better eat it!
Yeah, every kitchen plays that game. Or the cooks will revolt or quit.
Hola mi amigos. (Practicing for the pending invasion)
I need a new propane grill. Any recommendations? I don’t need anything fancy, just reliable. We got a CharBroil last time and it fell apart after a couple of years.
He was just a fucking loser who lasted about two weeks.
There’re a lot of those.
Weber Genesis is what I have. 3 burners (front/middle/rear). I think they have a few models called Genesis but mine is as wide as the usual grill with no extra burners or warming chambers. I keep it covered when I don’t use it which seems to make them last longer. I had a Char Broil that did the same thing after a few years.
Our Weber is 15 years old I don’t cover it.
Weber is indestructible.
I used to eat damned well when I worked at the beef packing plant.
Comment by Jay in Ames on July 9, 2014 7:57 am
Not a real talkative bunch the last few days, are ya?
Well, Rebecca’s birthday is tomorrow (guess who hasn’t shopped yet?), Mr. TiFW’s b’day is Saturday, and we’re taking Rebecca to camp this weekend, so our living room looks like a tornado hit it.
I’m making Mr. TiFW a very special B’day present (SYWM) – I’m putting together a playlist of country songs from all different eras. When we drive to visit his family, we are always out of range of our favorite radio stations.
Thanks to Amazon’s new Prime Music feature, I’ve been able to cobble together some of Mr. TiFW’s favorite country tunes (most of which I can also handle listening to).
Hank Williams Sr. may just put me in the grave, but by gum, this isn’t about me…..
Yeah but did you plant a garden, run, and do an hour of crack fat in 20 mins? Slacker.
Go with the Weber. I didn’t last time, and I regret it.
Railgun? Railgun.
Mach effin’ 7.
Go with your mom. I didn’t last time, and I regret it.
I have a friend who is a physicist and he’s always mystified when they trot out the “OMG Railgun” every few years. He says it’s really old technology and impractical. He was a scientific consultant for the military. Someone would have a great idea and he would explain why it wasn’t practical or feasible, or if it was great. Lasers on Navy ships? Okay, but the sea spray will give you big issues, plus it’s line of sight, so range is limited, etc.
Railguns on a ship make a lot of sense. Projectiles that go fast enough to knock down any detected incoming missile, and I don’t have to carry explosives, just run the reactor? Yes, please.
I’ve had this grill for the past three years. It has a side firebox for smoking on the right hand chamber. I love it. I do keep it covered. I think if I didn’t it would be a fucking rusty mess by now.
I never used to cover my Weber. I loved that grill too.
I have to cover my grill or literally pounds of sand will blow in.
I have to cover your mom or the flies will swarm.
Wut?
That was said in general.
Header icky.
I’m not a huge believer in rail guns yet, but I do like the idea of a battleship resurgence. Once you decide you want a big honking railgun, why not build a big enough ship to power a couple?
Of course, anything you can put on a ship, you can make bigger and put on land. Coastal artillery, anyone?
‘Murica
Coastal railgun/thorium reactor/desalination complexes would be basically the best things ever built.
Especially if they could fire giant hunks of heavily-compressed salt.
Because seasoning one’s enemies to death is hilarious.
Pepper them with salt projectiles?
xbrad gets 10 minutes in The Box for that pun.
No crackfat today but I did make several kid runs, went and bought some new wine glasses, weeded, cleaned the chicken coop, gave the dog a bath, and ran 5 miles. Worky worky in 90 minutes.
You figure a single battery of coastal railguns (2x guns), plus a UAV platoon and a SIGINT platoon for target aquisition, plus an air defense platoon with SAMs and perhaps smaller ADA railguns and a radar setup. Power it all from a couple portable nukes.
Land on an island, let your engineers build up the fortifications, set up your defenses, and harass everything within about two hundred miles.
YAY! PUNS!
Did you miss me? Next time try the pump shotgun with No. 7 birdshot!
Comment by Jay in Ames on July 9, 2014 3:45 pm
YAY! PUNS!
Noooooooo!!!!!!!!!
(This is why we can’t have nice things…..)
Bad cow pun.
Speaking of ‘Murica – I put up the message about Mr. TiFW’s playlist present, and his nephew asked jokingly if we had any of his band’s music on there.
Well, no – but thanks to modern technology, he sent me mp3 files, I uploaded them to our Amazon Music account, and now Mr. TiFW has 3 songs by his nephew’s band on his playlist (they’re pretty good, too!)
Cowpox gun
Rail guns = 1 shot, better not miss.
Don’t rail guns require some pretty significant capacitors? I think the physics are there, but I’m not sure it’s technically possible yet.
Did you watch the video, Jew?
We have the capacitance.
The U.S. Navy is fielding a rail gun as we speak.
A railgun will never be as awesome as a good ol’ fashioned trebuchet.
The video is cool as all hell, but a little weak on details. I’ll be more impressed when the thing is in production rather than testing.
Jewstin – Did you think the Navy Weapons Systems Command would release details? Really?
Yeah, I imagine most of the details remain classified, especially cycle time to next shot. We want the other guys to know that we can hit them with a 25# dart at mach 7, we don’t want them to know how long they get to run before we do it again.
Not in the least, MCPO, but they’re the same people who pay for research into hypersonic flight, and superconducting coils in electric motors.
It’s fascinating stuff, it’s all possible, and it’s not here yet. When it’s in production on operating ships I’ll be wowed. For now it’s just a technological bauble that might go nowhere.
*clicks stopwatch
OK, that’s enough of THAT.
You’re a horrible people but I’m sure you love your families.
Some of you.
I almost never comment at Ace’s anymore but that story got me to chime in. Holy shit.
I don’t think all Democrats are terrible people. I think they love whatever children they haven’t cut apart and suctioned from their wombs.
No way he uttered this. No way. But it sure has been tweeted like hell.
Source?
Other than a comment at Ace’s, and a fucking brilliant one at that, this doesn’t seem real (not that anything is really real anymore). In the Mollie Hemingway thread…
Apologies… I stand corrected:
http://washingtonexaminer.com/president-obama-republicans-arent-terrible-people-theyre-just-wrong/article/2550670
*smacks forehead*
Of-fucking-course he said it. Duh.
I don’t think liberals are terrible people. I think they’re mildly retarded step-children.
I don’t think the Obamas are terrible people………..and if that’s not a crock of shit I don’t know what to tell you. The fact that they’re electable is a large part of what’s wrong with the vast wave of brainless fucks I have to share this country with.
I think liberals are either terrible people or haven’t thought it through.
Which makes them terrible.
Charlie Stross, for instance, is a liberal and a terrible person.
My garden right now: Baltimore Oriole, a Northern Flicker, and several Robins all vying for the birdbath. Just beyond them, two rabbits munching on lawn clover. Hummingbirds are having a dogfight over the bee balm.
Laura, you’re preparing to capture them and smoke them all, aren’t you?
*looks shocked, shakes head violently ‘NO’ with feathers sticking out of corners of mouth*
Scott came home from work to grab dinner. I showed him the two rabbits and he told me to shoot them. But then when he left he scared them away.
My birdbath this year is a giant cooler lid from one of the old Moron Meetup ginormous foam coolers. Remember those? Well, we’re one down now. Because I’m wrecking the lid.
I put a big decorative rock in it. Because, classy.
Fan-ceeeee.
Are there plastic flamingos?
you bet yer hot ass, missy
Ha ha ha haaa shit. Misfire. Although I’m sure Jewstin’s ass is probably hot.
HA HA Timing
So I went to see my vaper lady again, fully intending only to exchange a flawed battery and pick up replacement coils, but dangitall if I didn’t walk out of there with another juice flavor: Peach Mango. I’ve mixed it with a minty/menthol-y juice and I swear I’m vaping a Fuzzy Navel or some such beverage. WOWZA.
I can just see Laurawr lovingly tending to the various pink plastic flamingos and lawn gnomes in her yard and the neighbors going insane.
Comment by leoncaruthers on July 9, 2014 6:37 pm
I think liberals are either terrible people or haven’t thought it through.
=============
Liberals don’t think, they feel…………
One of my first posts at Ace’s was about a guy who put plastic flamingos on a tall pole so that his neighbor would see it over the fence. I just love that kind of warfare.
I had a neighbor in Idaho who got miffed when I left my Christmas lights up past the 1st of January. So, I left them up until July as a tool of vengeance.
http://ace.mu.nu/archives/131845.php#131845
Peach Mojito – THAT’S what I was trying to think of that this tastes like.
That’s like from the wayback time machine, Laura!
Old flame thread from way back then too. With Sean M! http://minx.cc:1080/?post=131095
I’ve been off antihistamines for a whole week now.
Time for a cocktail to celebrate.
Cool Thread pull LW. Ah like how you ripped on Monty few being an unfunny Nerd! I laugh and Laugh. Of course he’s a brilliant fucher but you know just how to tweak that.
Badge for The Day.
Cheers Leon. Its about time. What are ye having this eve?
F!
CHUMPO! Why the name change, dear?
’cause I’m a spazzz!!!
can’t make ze Goog work yet.
Comment by lauraw on July 9, 2014 7:52 pm
Old flame thread from way back then too. With Sean M! http://minx.cc:1080/?post=131095
It’s amazing to look at a AoS thread and see how few posters there were at that time. That whole thread is about 5 minutes worth of responses now.
Cheers Leon. Its about time. What are ye having this eve?
2oz CitrĂ³n, 2oz tequila, ice, and club soda. Basically a fizzy margarita.
I commented at Ace back then but I had good enough sense to keep my unwitty ass off of a flame thread.
Did anybody find out the hard way that anybody else could NOT cut hair “just as good as a pro” today?
I wish I had enough hair to care whether somebody fucked it up or not.
Shawn, you may NOT talk to my sons about their haircuts without my presence. I think the judge made that pretty clear.
I cut my own hairs as well as any pro could.
the hair on the top and front of my head grow slowly. This is where I want more hair.
The ones on sides and back grow much faster. This is where I like it short. Such is life.
So I naturally want the hair on top and front to be left alone, or cut only slightly. I also want sides and back to be trimmed very short.
All the asshole barbers insist on doing the other way round. I have given up. I have accepted my fate that I will be cutting my own hair and looking weird.
Tushar, four options:
1) Man up and say “A little off the sides and back, leave the length on top. Do anything else and I will summon Gurkhas.”
2) Get some clippers and learn to do it by feel.
3) Convert to Sikhism and get a turban.
4) Shave your head.
I can’t wait to shave this mess off. I hope somebody is happy with their damn wig.
Leon, I tried option one. In New Jersey, is is impossible to find male barbers. And I am not good at being stern with women.
I shifted to option 2 a few years back. The results are mixed but acceptable.
3 looks tempting.
4 I am naturally progressing towards.
for those who have not met me: I don’t look like Apu. The resemblance is slight.
In New Jersey, is is impossible to find male barbers.
What. The. Fuck?
man, those old threads Laura fished out bring back memories. I remember the news about Slu getting a baby daughter. She is nearly 9 years old now!
I have known some of you retards for a nearly a quarter of my life.
And I am not good at being stern with women.
They love it. Go ahead.
That’s what happens when you are required by law to let someone else pump your own gasoline.
I once tried a male barber in Maryland. I told him to keep the top hair long. I either assumed he would keep the frong hair long, or I told him and he did not hear. Either way, he cut the front hair short, and left the top long.
I ended up looking like this:
>>That’s what happens when you are required by law to let someone else pump your own gasoline.
It is great in winter though.
I am offended by TFG and the header pic. Mostly TFG. Mostly. (Cartman’d)
Relevant: http://thenypost.files.wordpress.com/2014/04/20140415_zaf_n44_033-1.jpg
And your ears stay warm.
I always thought Robert Pine was the most attractive actor on CHIPS. Chris Pine’s skin creeps me out in HD. Thanks to Lippy, now his eyes are creeping me out.
Don’t talk shit about
TotalChris Pine!!11!http://www.pagetopremiere.com/2014/07/exclusive-outlander-featurette-book-to-series/
Relevant: http://thenypost.files.wordpress.com/2014/04/20140415_zaf_n44_033-1.jpg
That was actually a pretty hip look amongst the younger Mexican male set a couple of years ago.
It’s pretty close to Pedro’s haircut from Napoleon Dynamite, iirc.
Relevant: http://thenypost.files.wordpress.com/2014/04/20140415_zaf_n44_033-1.jpg
Tal Bachman. She’s So High.
Except he’s not blonde.
I actually like him as Kirk.
I was wearing a Fab Four tee at work and a little boy reached out to touch Goofy. Boob level Goofy. Hostage material?
Chris Pine is way hunky.
Get ready for a new and very impotent poat…
NEW POAT NOW