So I got an email this morning from my cousin. Apparently different members of my far-flung clan have been working at a website on a family tree. I scrolled through it, and started to fill in the gaps I saw when I noticed that apparently my Dad had a brother. This was something of a surprise because I have NEVER seen or heard his name mentioned. Truly a surprise to me. I looked to see who added this person. It was my Dad’s older sister. I sent her an email asking who he is/was.
352 Comments
Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.
Flawlessly naming puppies since March 2009 
Firsteses?
Secondies.
Beasn, if you don’t know what Goatse is, you are better off. Don’t try to find out.
Warning duly noted though I figured it might have been something hostage-like and refused to google.
Hello hotsausages! ‘sup?
Sorry I killed your thread, BiW.
Brew! Wassup, cheesehead?
Well that’s a happy video…
I want to have Beasn’s adopted child!!
I want to have Beasn’s adopted child!!
You ARE Beasn’s adopted child!
The sun finally came out this afternoon. I felt like Nosferatu at the dawn!
For Beasn: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WNf9BmZE6SE
Count Orlock, Chief. Nosferatu was what he was.
HA HA HAHAHAHAHAAA
BiW new thread FAIL!!!
http://tinyurl.com/csh23y
Hey, if MC wants to be Nosferatu, then let him
I want to have Beasn’s adopted child!!
SWEET! I’ve always wanted another. Will you give up all rights to said child except the paying for the college part?
You ARE Beasn’s adopted child!
Er…maybe I’m his.
Beasn – Why you gotta h8 on me alla time?
Well MCPO, I really like Mr. Beasn, and know next to nothing about you. So, if you have my adopted child, what’s a girl to do?
Hows about I make you some cake?
What’s to know about him? He hangs out here when he isn’t on the golf course, so he obviously had impeccable taste, and since you are known by the company you keep, he is obviously one of the cool kids, too. He served in the Navy and plays golf, so he is atheletic, and he is always a gentleman, despite Bart’s numerous attempts to drag him into the mud with him.
What are you waiting for?
BiW, this is a serious story? if so, I can’t even imagine how I’d feel. I hope you keep us up to date.
All hell, every family has a black sheep. We have several.
B-a-a-a-a-a
We are poor little lambs
Who have lost our way.
Baa! Baa! Baa!
We are little black sheep
Who have gone astray.
Baa! Baa! Baa!
Gentlemen songsters off on a spree
Damned from here to eternity
God have mercy on such as we.
Baa! Baa! Baa!
Comment by Generic Rosetta Comment Generator on May 7, 2009 3:45 pm
Hahahahaha. Excellent.
I am drinking cold beer and I’m done working for the day. Let’s makeh teh funneh, shall we?
And that’s my new favorite song, BiW. An H2 classmate could have written that. Although it would have likely been more vulgar but whatever.
HI FOLLY!!!
What are you waiting for?
How can I continue to resist such a HAWTY?
What should we talk about? Politics? People we want to stab in the face? Why we like the Jews? Boobies?
Rosie – Get up off of that thing and finish the POL page, woodja?
Rosie, check your email
All hell, every family has a black sheep. We have several.
RACIST!!!!
Rosie – You ever been to Israel?
Here is one of the reasons I like the Jews: http://tiny.pl/zk4c
Here come the thunderstorms! Wheeeee
Wunderground is a great weather site. Click on ‘animate map’ to watch me get whomped by that line of storms in real time.
http://tinyurl.com/cklyoh
I always like the subject “people I’d like to stab in the face.”
For example, the Hawaii state legislature and senate. Dumb f’ers
Islamic day!!!
Rosie – Get up off of that thing and finish the POL page, woodja?
YOU’RE NOT MY REAL GREAT-GRANDFATHER!!!!!!!!!!
BiW, this is a serious story? if so, I can’t even imagine how I’d feel. I hope you keep us up to date.
My aunt shot me an email back. Apparently my ‘uncle’ was stillborn in 1958. My grandma has NEVER mentioned him, and Grandpa only told my Dad and Aunts about it once, then It Was Never Mentioned Again.
“YOU’RE NOT MY REAL GREAT-GRANDFATHER!!!!!!!!!!”
hahahahahaaha
Old age jokes never get stale (unless they’re about me).
Here is my Jew-loving cred:
I opened my Yahoo page, and got an advert: “Find local Jewish singles”.
Even Yahoo knows that I love teh Juice.
Mare and C3PO dancing:
Et tu, Mare??
Hi Mare. Are you having like, the best day ever?
C3PO, did you notice I made fun of my own age? I’m there with you, brother!
“Hi Mare. Are you having like, the best day ever?”
Except for the dumbshits in the Hawaiian Legislature, yes!
Rosetta, did you make lots of money today?
How was golf today, MCPO?
I hope you kicked ass.
And I’m glad you’re getting some sun. I can’t imagine living in Murtha’s state AND it raining all the time.
Brew! Wassup, cheesehead?
Tushar! I was thinking about you the other day. The project team I’m on is mostly young guys from India. They took me out for Indian food last week. Pretty darn good if I say so myself. I cracked them all up though when I took a big old mouthful of what they told me was a ‘pickle’ relish kinda thing. Yikes!
Rosie – Shot a 78 and won some money. Could have been better if my putter had cooperated (Shut Your Whore Mouth!).
Get this, at my daughter’s induction into the National Honor Society, they mentioned that Obama didn’t have the grades while at her school to make it in. Geesh, you only need a 3.5. The way they talk about Obama being so smart you would think that would have been easy.
I still contend he is a lucky, affirmative action dumb ass!
Brewfan, I like your picture with the your doggie.
Actually, I like all the pictures. MCPO yours is good too. I like the smiley face ones.
Rosetta, did you make lots of money today?
I picked up a new client yesteday so yes, today was actually a great day. Thanks for axing.
The last two months have been outstanding for our clients so meeting and reviewing accounts now involves more hugs and handshakes and less kicks to the junk and punches to the face.
Mare, if you want, I will come to Hawaii and Taze every member of the state legislature.
I still contend he is a lucky, affirmative action dumb ass!
You think there might be a reason his college transcripts have never been released??
Wouldn’t want the god of the left to have clay feet, woodja?
Mare – That photo is the result of:
Son: “Dad!”
Me: . . .
Son: “Dad!”
Me: . . .
Son: “Dad!”
Me: “Dork!”
>>I cracked them all up though when I took a big old mouthful of what they told me was a ‘pickle’ relish kinda thing.
Ow! Brew, those things are extremely spicy. Better to keep a beer or Lassi (Indian milkshake) around when you get in a pickle like that.
Rosie – Glad things are turning around for you. Let’s all raise a glass to Rosetta!
On a related note, if I can find a good job, I would relocate to rural Wisconsin in a heartbeat. Nice place and really nice people. If it was not for my experience with the rural Wisconsinians … Wisconsonites…. Wisquatchs, I would have believed the liberal canard that rural white folks are racist.
I still contend he is a lucky, affirmative action dumb ass!
GASP!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!
It doesn’t matter anyway. He could fail the square block-round hole test and still be good because his LPCPA* is 4.5 on a 4.0 scale.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
*liberal politically correct point average
Brewfan, I like your picture with the your doggie.
Thanks, Mare. Buddy is a good boy. He does like to chew stuff, though, so you gotta watch him like a hawk. He chewed up Mrs. BrewFan’s laptop A/C adapter cord. Luckily for him it was the 12V side and not the 120V side.
“Mare, if you want, I will come to Hawaii and Taze every member of the state legislature.”
YES!
“You think there might be a reason his college transcripts have never been released??”
MCPO, there is no question in my mind they are trying to cover for him. A paper on breaking down the Constitution? Poor grades? Weak classes? Who knows?
I still contend he is a lucky, affirmative action dumb ass!
And if you know anything about Alinsky, he was chosen specifically because of his resume.
Whoa! I did not know that Bush Press Secretary Dana Perino now blogs at NRO corner. I sometimes have naughty thoughts about her.
Tushar – Brew should have made an offering to this one to ensure a good meal!
http://tiny.pl/zk44
Rosie – Glad things are turning around for you. Let’s all raise a glass to Rosetta!
Ha! Thanks buddy. The last 6 months were definitely rough and I know that we’ll see bad weeks ahead but I really believe the market’s turned a corner and that makes The Business Baby Jesus stop pooping his pants.
It was sad today, on a local talk radio show a veteran and life long resident of Hawaii was absolutely mortified and embarrassed that the legislature passed “Islam Day.” He was so sick about it, I thought he was going to cry. He is a wounded veteran.
http://www.americanpatrol.com/REFERENCE/Alinsky-SaulRef.html
Rules for Radicals stresses organizational power-collecting: “The ego of the organizer is stronger and more monumental than the ego of the leader. The organizer is in a true sense reaching for the highest level for which a man can reach — to create, to be a ‘great creator’, to play God.”
Dana Perino is a cutie. She’s no Mare but she’s still damn cute.
>>Tushar – Brew should have made an offering to this one to ensure a good meal!
Hah!
“less kicks to the junk and punches to the face.”
hahahaha
*stupid clients
Lots of software development opportunities are opening up in Madison, especially if you work in the Java/J2EE/Oracle stack
Brew – Tell Mesa!!!!
F SALT!!!!!
DON’T TALK SHIT ABOUT TOTAL!!!!!!!!!
BOB SAGET!!!!!!
Meh….later.
Time to make the donuts.
Beasn, the great thing about Saul Alinsky, just like with Karl Marx, it’s a hot chick on paper and an ugly fat fuck in practice.
I know Brew. But I did the stupid mistake of buying a house in New Jersey, and miraculously, I still have equity in it.
It would be fun to work in Madison, and live a few miles outside, in the beautiful rural WI.
I feel this way again (not it’s about the idiots in the legislature here):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LBeg7CZqSx0
now instead of not
The last 6 months were definitely rough and I know that we’ll see bad weeks ahead but I really believe the market’s turned a corner and that makes The Business Baby Jesus stop pooping his pants.
Word!
Time to make the donuts.
Hahahahaha. I love that. SEND ME A DOZEN BEASN!!!
That Doggie looks like my Reagan
“that makes The Business Baby Jesus stop pooping his pants.”
Also, gives the dems ammo to say Obama’s policies work.
Not word!
It would have improved on it’s own. It always did.
It would be fun to work in Madison, and live a few miles outside, in the beautiful rural WI.
For all 45 days of summer.
Sohita – Back from PT??
>>Time to make the donuts.
This guy goes to a breakfast place, and is disgusted to see the cook making burger patties by taking lumps of meat and flattening it in his armpits. The girl at the counter senses his outrage and says, “you should see him in the afternoon, when he makes donuts”.
Yes MCPO I went at 9:30 this morning and got home at 11:00. Still sore.
Ha! Thanks buddy. The last 6 months were definitely rough and I know that we’ll see bad weeks ahead but I really believe the market’s turned a corner and that makes The Business Baby Jesus stop pooping his pants.
Except for the fact that the bully in chief and his cronies have a deep and abiding disrespect for the rule of law, especially when it comes to business, so unless they’re made to knock that shit off and start respecting the law and stop demonizing those who contract according to it, I think the business baby jesus is going to crap like he ate a whole pack of Ex-Lax, then leave us for a country more friendly to private business, like Fwance.
Word!
March was the best month in the market in six years and April was the best month in nine years.
Our economy and our market are some resilient mofos. It has never faced an opponent like Obama but I put my money on the economy. It will survive four years of abuse and when Obama is thrown out on his ass in 4 years, it will thrive again.
VIVA LA CAPITALISM!!!!
Sohita – I hope it went well.
BiW – Amen, brother!
Sohita, do you think it will get “easier” or just be like a roller coaster?
>>when Obama is thrown out on his ass in 4 years, it will thrive again.
I am praying for that. But the damage he does will take a few decades to reverse.
It went well. It is painful but not overly so I have a new definition of pain these days.
Mare, Its like a roller coaster b/c every night when you go to sleep for 7-8 hours your foot goes into the relaxed position and so each day you have to start from scratch. Its a wonder that it works at all but it does. He said today that he doesnt see anything that is going to keep me from 100% recovery.
What is great about all of it is that my butt and leg muscles are getting really tight.
My aunt shot me an email back. Apparently my ‘uncle’ was stillborn in 1958. My grandma has NEVER mentioned him, and Grandpa only told my Dad and Aunts about it once, then It Was Never Mentioned Again.
very interesting BiW. Back then it seems women just had to suck it up and deal with it. There’s 4 girls in my mom’s family. The two boys died. One was a stillborn and one was a cribdeath. Kinda sucks because having lost two myself, you kinda just have to suck it up and move on and even though other people don’t mention it, you always know there’s a place or two missing at the dinner table and there’ll always be a hole in your heart for those two babies.
What is great about all of it is that my butt and leg muscles are getting really tight.
rawr
VIVA LA CAPITALISM!!!!
Is that like some sort of siete de mayo salute?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1176864/Paramedic-tried-buy-wine-wearing-thong-supermarket-staff-refused-serve-uniform.html
TBOM?
“He said today that he doesnt see anything that is going to keep me from 100% recovery.”
TIME TO CELEBRATE!!
Drinks anyone???
He selected a bottle of wine but become annoyed when the check-out assistant told him it was the store’s policy not to sell alcohol to people wearing uniform.
How ridiculous!
Rosetta, you missed a birfday, there’s one tomorrow, and Folly’s is next Wednesday.
Wipe the blood and guts off the the BSoP and get busy, man-lesbian!
^yah, because he should have bought whiskey
TIME TO CELEBRATE!!
Drinks anyone???
I am going to go have beer and wings in just a few minutes.
rosetta said one birthday stick of pain per person. count has had one I’m pretty sure and so has Robert
OH! OH! OH! Sohos, will you down a couple beers for me sweet thang?
Hi Rosetta.
How many of the BSoPs survived the switchover?
I think one of us has them on our storage. I know I have a bunch of stuff sitting in gmail that I haven’t transfered over yet.
Of course! I will have several.
Oh, I didn’t see mare was handing out drinks………..
she offered and then took off
Yay – I’m free, I’m free, wheeeeee!!!
. . . and freedom tastes of reality.
You’re free? so I don’t have to pay?
PJM, what can I get for you?
I escaped from work, for a little while, anyway.
PJ, wasn’t I cheap enough for you?
Romy – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGa70tVYVKo
sure, now you guys talk when I have to go pick up the kids
I’ll be back
*points finger at all you guys
Ohhhh, I’ll be back
^Ohhhhhh! I’m scared!!! /sarc^
MCPO – yeah!!!!! (plays air guitar)
Rosetta, you missed a birfday, there’s one tomorrow, and Folly’s is next Wednesday.
Wipe the blood and guts off the the BSoP and get busy, man-lesbian!
Anyone looking for that last minute gift, I’ll take money or booze.
Now I know what Mare did in her youth!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qiTrZURtSxk
the hydrant and the postage stamp killed the thread
Hi Dingaling. My brfday is next week. Watcha getting me?
D-ling, bite me. I ain’t kiit nuthin’ – yet.
For Rosetta who is most likely into his second bottle of wine.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=baRqH3dBmBE
Folly, a coupon for a free bath with me.
Romy has the bestest avatar in the entire websphere!!
Folly, a coupon for a free bath with me.
Cool, can I get a bottle of wine thrown in with that?
MCPO schools Burt
Folly, a coupon for a free bath with me
Cool, can I get a rufie
bottle of winethrown in with that so I don’t have to remember it?What folly really wanted to say.
MCPO, as seen by others:
http://www.goatlocker.org/resources/cpo/humor/cpoview.htm
Hahahaha, PJ.
Oh look, a real whore is running for Senate:
http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2009/05/07/porn-star-tours-louisiana-gauge-support-senate-bid/
MCPO, thank you, especially because we know why. 😉
Man, I have a lot to catch up on. I missed Tuesday, and all I got to read yesterday was the yearbook page.
stupid strikes
sheesh
MCPO,
I found this nice compilation:
http://www.goatlocker.org/resources/cpo/humor/realchiefs.htm
One of the items says:
REAL CHIEFS: have a permanent curl in their forefinger.
Care to teach me what that means?
Tushar – The permanent curl comes from holding a coffee cup.
Folly – Stormy for Senate!!!! http://tiny.pl/zkns
Hahahaha, good one, Tush.
>>The permanent curl comes from holding a coffee cup.
Ah!
REAL CHIEFS:
are the only people who can make the salutation “Ensign” sound like a four letter word.
*sniff* So true, so true. *sniff*
REAL CHIEFS:
think that “sensitivity” is a control knob on a radar or sonar console and that’s all it is.
REAL CHIEFS:
take eighteen year-old idiots and hammer them into Sailors.
,i>REAL CHIEFS:
take eighteen year-old idiots and hammer them into Sailors.
Beg your pardon, Tushar, but that the job of the First Class Petty Officer, ya know, the guys that REALLY run the Navy.
The Chief’s job is to stay in the Goat Locker, out of our way, unless we need something from the LT.
What is Teh Yearbook?
Here’s what a REAL CHIEF looks like: http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3382/3427417615_e165bbb03a_o.jpg
Time to cook dinner – country-fried steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, and fruit salad. BBL.
Naaah…He’s not quite fat enough.
Jewstin – We sent in our senior class picture and made a Hostage’s Yearbook!! Send your senior photo to Rosie and he’ll add you and give you the password.
MCPO and Espkc,
if you two are going to have a fight, I better stay out of the way.
I might throw peanuts to enrage both of you.
All kidding aside, I was blessed to work for great Chiefs.
…and MC3PO seems to be a pretty cool dude, for a friggin airdale
I will have to decline since my photos are stashed somewhere in the next state.
Plus, I don’t think I want anybody to see me wearing a paisley shirt.
Tushar – You had to be a First Class in order to make Master Chief. My tour as a Leading Petty Officer on the ship was my best time in the Navy!
What Folly hears:
Blah….blah…blah…Navy….blah…blah….blah
What MCPO just heard:
Whine. . .wine. . .whine. . . wine
Whattup, pedalphiles?
Wiser!!! How’s it going gorgeous.
Wiser – Rosie is shit-faced, Tushar is in learning mode, Icepick and I are reminiscing and Folly is being. . . Folly.
Rosie is shit-faced,
NO! fer realz?
Folly is being. . . Folly.
As it should be. ‘Cause Folly knows a quality man when she sees one.
Folly, I looked at the Yearbook page. You were a fox.
Plus, I don’t think I want anybody to see me wearing a paisley shirt.
Jewstin: That won’t shock anyone…except for Rosetta, who doesn’t want any guy looking prettier than him.
So, we doing a joke thread tonight? I’ll rush out and get some beer so I can be fully prepped and ready for the insanity, vulgarity and stupidity that is the hallmark of a great joke thread.
I will have to decline since my photos are stashed somewhere in the next state.
Considering how old you look in you PoL pic, I’m gonna figure you look pretty much the same anyway.
As it should be. ‘Cause Folly knows a quality man when she sees one.
That, my friend, is some seriously weak shit.
That, my friend, is some seriously weak shit.
Ahh, I love the sweet, sweet smell of envy. Smells like……. well, envy, actually.
Wiser, check your mail
Already got it, Tush and was just about to unzip it.
Once again, thanks for all your excellent work on this. I think that this will be a very nice surprise for the rest of the Hostages, etc., when this project is completed.
Wiser, WTF are you talking about?
Do you really think the midget pron pics will surprise the Hostages?
And any project where you unzip your fly?
brrrr…
TMI
Do you really think the midget pron pics will surprise the Hostages?
Okay, maybe “surprise” was the wrong word. How about “confuse?” or “titillate” (that one just sent BiW to his bunk.)
How about “infuriate?” Nah, that one would only work on he who shall not be named.
Do you really think the midget pron pics will surprise the Hostages?
It will when we discover that you’re the midget. Dude, that is a serious footstool you have behind the counter…I never realized…how much for the Ottoman magazine?
Folly is being. . . Folly.
What does that mean?
Folly, I looked at the Yearbook page. You were a fox.
Thank you, Wiser.
I am praying for that. But the damage he does will take a few decades to reverse.
Carter, despite his best efforts, only fucked shit up until Reagan brought the thunder.
This being the fall of Rome and all that shit is a bit hysterical. The more power these idiots grab, the bigger the punch to the junk they get when the people tire of the smell of unicorn shit.
Hasn’t happened yet but it will.
Unicorns are like chimps; they’re fun and entertaining until they bite your face off. Then we kill them dead.
Unicorns are like chimps;
ummmmmmmm……….
Once again, thanks for all your excellent work on this. I think that this will be a very nice surprise for the rest of the Hostages, etc., when this project is completed.
Yeah, Tushar. I doubt that anyone is interested in wiserbud’s affection for the midget farm porn site that you’re working on.
Keep your perverted crap quiet, wiserbud. This is a family friendly site. Manson family but still.
Keep your perverted crap quiet, wiserbud.
This from the chubby-midgets-on-ottomans-chaser.
Richard, are you hanging out for a while? Or do you have dead hookers off which you need to snort blow?
I was just about to head out and get some libations for the evening.
I should be back in a few.
This from the chubby-midgets-on-ottomans-chaser.
I doubt pajama banana will appreciate you calling her a “chubby midget”. You should prolly put your body armor on.
I was just about to head out and get some
libationsman-love for the evening.There you go.
Okay, Liberace, when you’re “done” come back here and let’s raise hell. I will do what I can to upset the apple cart while you’re gone.
‘Sup, fagz?
“M., Sean M., Well known man-whore”
Sean M. likes to go to the petting zoo but not for the right reasons.
Notice it’s not called the “heavy pettting” zoo, sicko.
*raises $25,000 bail for Sean*
*spends money on hookers instead*
Hi everyone.
“M., Sean M., Well known man-whore”
002, license to clean rubber fists.
Hey, Car-in!
*DOGPILE ON CARIN!!!*
“M., Sean M., Well known man-whore”
002 4/7, license to rub alpaca gonads.
Did Rosie fix the POL page yet?
Car-in – Are you ticklish?
Did Rosie fix the POL page yet?
Not yet. I’m having some union problems which I’m working through. Apparently some thugs are trying to organize my liver which I’m fighting against.
I emailed you the password, correct?
I will get the photos all up in the next day or so.
I dunno. I haven’t been tickled in a while.
Funniest union scene ever – Madagascar 2. That was some funny shit.
“M., Sean M., Well known man-whore”
00SALT!!!!!, license to FUCK!!!!!
what’s with the optimismism, Rotini?
Okay, how exactly did I get tagged with the rubber fist thing?
Yes, I have the password.
Hey, where is Pjmomma? Did she really have a tummy tuck, or was she joshing about that?
sup Bartulism?
“M., Sean M., Well known man-whore”
Double naught 4, License to turn the cement pond yeller!!
00SALT!!!!!, license to FUCK!!!!!
Shirlena?
she really did replace her belly button, querida
I gotta go and pretend I’m smart and check out Protein Wisdom
I’ll be back later once I’m drunk.
Carin – She is in the photo with her sister, Sheriff Kare-Kare. Yes, she had surgery to repair an abdominal tear.
what size dress do you wear, Ro?
you got no Italian blood in you at all, do you?
what’s with the optimismism, Rotini?
I’m normally optimistic but two months of good market helps. Also, I have a new pair of manties on and they feel good.
I had wings and beer and now I am in my jammies and in bed.
I thought Jeff closed up PW????
I have the Ortho appt in Houston at 8:45 tomorrow morning. Hell drive.
Chief, what does, “Folly is being Folly,” mean?
Sohita – Stop it! You’ll get me all hot and bothered.
The wings were HOT but there was good cold beer. I am in pain but it is worth it.
00SALT!!!!!, license to FUCK!!!!!
Shirlena?
Hahahahaha!!
We’ll do that bit in the Broadway show right before the chimp eats your face off.
I thought Jeff closed up PW????
I think he threatens to close it or walk away and hand the keys to Darleen and Dan every few months or so. I like Jeff, and he’s a super-smart guy, but it’s all gotten a little too roller coaster-y over the last year or so.
I am going to try this one last time
Rosetta have you seen the show Escape to Chimp Eden yet?
Sean, he’s a vewy thenthitive guy…
what size dress do you wear, Ro?
Size 2. But if I puke more I can get down to a 0.
you got no Italian blood in you at all, do you?
No. I come from respectable stock.
“Escape to Chimp Eden”
We were watching that one night at my daughter’s house. It was pretty quiet and, very seriously, my son in law says to me “isn’t that one of your sisters?”
Rosetta have you seen the show Escape to Chimp Eden yet?
I don’t think so. It sounds sacrilegious.
Vmax with dental floss?
http://tiny.pl/zkk3
I’m going fishing. See ya later.
Vmax with dental floss?
They’re going to need to clean that seat off.
Thats bad KKA… I like the show though. I was watching on the animal planet how these HUGE swine are starting to take over the states. It was very weird.
KAK?
http://tinyurl.com/cecg63
KKA, will you catch me a nice bass?
Thank you in advance.
where is teh funneh?
Bart, what do YOU want to talk about?
I feel like arguing so you pick a topic and a side and I will beat you about the head and neck.
ahhhhh….beeeeeerrrrrr…….
alcohol is proof that I love me.
Sniff, sniff, Wiser can I have a beer?
The next tattoo on my forehead.
I wanna talk about my evil genius plan to stick it to Obama.
Folly, do you ever take a shower or are you only bath?
Sniff, sniff, Wiser can I have a beer?
Hmmmmmmm…….. I only have 12 for the night. Not sure if I can spare one…….
Oh what the hell. Come to my hotel room and you can have all the beer you want, Fally.
Folly, do you ever take a shower or are you only bath?
I shower in the morning and take a bath at night.
I wanna talk about my evil genius plan to stick it to Obama.
Do you have a newsletter? How can I aid your mission? Does it involve me giving Kerry Marie sweet love?
Oh what the hell. Come to my hotel room and you can have all the beer you want, Fally.
That’s Folly and what else are you offering in your hotel room?
Does it involve me giving Kerry Marie sweet love?
Wouldn’t that be the evil genius plan to stick it Kerry Marie?
It doesn’t involve Kerry Marie, unfortunately.
Rosie – The proposition is this; Although there are now 2 corroborating documents, and one witness statement, that verify the Speaker Pelosi was present at, and participated in, discussions about waterboarding and other enhanced interrogation techniques, she is not lying when she says, “I know nossing!”
That’s Folly and what else are you offering in your hotel room?
If you want a beer, you’ll let me call you whatever I want to call you.
As for anything else besides the beer, that all depends on how well you can handle your beer.
I wanna talk about my evil genius plan to stick it to Obama.
Also, I think given time, the man will stick it to himself. No one gets this amount of media oral sex and doesn’t fuck up.
Clinton was loved and thought he could get away with a private bukkake on Chubbsy McFatterson’s blue dress.
Obama walks on teh water so after a while, what can’t he get away with? That will be where some shit hits some fan.
If you want a beer, you’ll let me call you whatever I want to call you.
As for anything else besides the beer, that all depends on how well you can handle your beer.
I see. Well it all depends on how many beers you give me.
As much as I detest them I cannot see teh One cheating on his wife.
Folly, do you ever take a shower or are you only bath?
ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?
Well it all depends on how many beers you give me.
I’m waiting for someone to tell us to “get a room.”
HEH! GOT ONE!!!
Well, if that stupid voucher bill passes, let’s all buy $50 shitboxes and collect our $4500 vouchers.
I’m waiting for someone to tell us to “get a room.”
HEH! GOT ONE!!!
We haven’t even gotten hot and heavy yet.
HEH! GOT ONE!!!
Thus the reason I didnt say it genius 😉
As much as I detest them I cannot see teh One cheating on his wife.
That’s because the Wookie would use her special electronic crossbow on his narrow ass!
Rosie – The proposition is this; Although there are now 2 corroborating documents, and one witness statement, that verify the Speaker Pelosi was present at, and participated in, discussions about waterboarding and other enhanced interrogation techniques, she is not lying when she says, “I know nossing!”
Hahahahaha. Pelosi, pre-botox.
http://tinyurl.com/cloe9f
ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?
Hahahahaha.
FUCK THIS! YOU’RE THE MOTHERFUCKER THAN SHOULD BE ON BRAIN DETAIL!!
Nancy Pelosi pre-botox
http://tinyurl.com/3ekfpc
“Then we kill them dead.”
Flame Thrower time!!
True chief I think SHE wears the pants in that relationship
It doesn’t involve Kerry Marie, unfortunately.
*shakes fist at sky*
ATTTTKIKKKKKKIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNSSSSS!!!!!!
We haven’t even gotten hot and heavy yet.
What? What are you talking about? I’m already done!
Listen, take all the beer you want, ‘k? I got an early flight tomorrow and I’m gonna get some sleep.
You were gre…..
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
I’m going to have the Missus cut my hair – BBL
wiser that woman scares me
Wiser, do you dream about the islands (and island monkeys)?
FUCK THIS! YOU’RE THE MOTHERFUCKER THAN SHOULD BE ON BRAIN DETAIL!!
I refer you to my previous comment.
What? What are you talking about? I’m already done!
Listen, take all the beer you want, ‘k? I got an early flight tomorrow and I’m gonna get some sleep.
You were gre…..
That figures. Another wham, bam, thank you, ma’am and of course, I got NOTHING out of it.
Thus the reason I didnt say it genius
I knew there was a reason that wiserbud ♥ s( . )h( . )s
MARE WANTS A FLAME WAR!!!!jew!!!!
That figures. Another wham, bam, thank you, ma’am and of course, I got NOTHING out of it.
You got beer. What more did you want?
damn, some women…..
wiser that woman scares me
Oh, be nice. Folly and I were just playing around. No need to be afraid of her.
You got beer. What more did you want?
damn, some women…..
Hey, for the performance I gave, I deserved more than a couple of PBRs.
Rosetta, I posted my story on the yearbook page. Glad you thought it was funny. 🙂
I’m going to have the Missus cut my hair – BBL
What hair?
MOM!!!!!! MCPO IS HAVING HIS WIFE TRIM HIS BUSH!!!!!
Wiser, do you dream about the islands (and island monkeys)?
Every day, Mare. Every day.
And ever since I saw your high school pic, the dreams have become a little more…… fun.
wiserbud ♥ Sohita……….that is my new name now
Oh, and the photo of the “real chief”? I’d hit it.
Rosetta, please rip someone a new one immediately! I am putting dinner together and am going back and forth between the computer and making french dip sandwiches with some other crap.
Hey, for the performance I gave, I deserved more than a couple of PBRs.
You took the PBRs? Dammit, I told you those were for me. You got the Miller Chills!
You took the PBRs? Dammit, I told you those were for me. You got the Miller Chills!
Look, you cheap bastard, as Janet Jackson once said, “Love don’t come for free.” I wanted the Corona but noooooooooooooooooo, you had to drink those.
wiserbud ♥ Sohita……….that is my new name now
You’ll always be sohos to me……
Rosetta, I posted my story on the yearbook page. Glad you thought it was funny.
RFH, I know you didn’t think it was funny at the time and I wouldn’t have either but in retrospect….it’s pretty funny.
Plus the guy takes pictures of kids for a living. How often does he get to make fun of anyone.
Plus you know 100 digits of pi; he prolly doesn’t even know how to bake a pie.
RFH WIN!!!!!!
I wanted the Corona but noooooooooooooooooo, you had to drink those.
*grabs Corona bottle and quickly searches room….
Holy hell, are you actually here?
yeah to me too. I just like Sohita but I’m really still sohos….schizophrenic much?
then we take the vouchers and buy new cars
or trade them for crack
Holy hell, are you actually here?
Check your closet.
I am putting dinner together and am going back and forth between the computer and making french dip sandwiches with some other crap.
Huh. I thought they were made with roast beef.
wiser do you really do the lime and then the thumb in bottle etc? I do it too and I am the only one I know who can do it without spilling.
Check your closet.
Nope. You’re not there. Just Burl.
Rosetta, I have a lovely candidate for a rant for you. Pretty please would you rip a new one for my friend’s soon-to-be ex-wife, who left him after 25 years of marriage for a guy she dated in high school for less than two weeks. Left him with their two kids. He has to sell the house. (Probably rather sell the kids, since they are teenagers.) Then she calls him to tell him how great she is doing and how much better life is. “Bitch” is a given, I’m trying to come up with something more creative like “ass-potato felcher”.
Gracias.
Rosetta, please rip someone a new one immediately!
Who? I need direction. Or should Ii just rip on people on general? And what’s for dinner??
wiser do you really do the lime and then the thumb in bottle etc?
yep. I thought everyone did it.
I’m starting to like sojita.
wiser do you really do the lime and then the thumb in bottle etc? I do it too and I am the only one I know who can do it without spilling.
So, you know a bunch of ar-tards, huh?
“And ever since I saw your high school pic, the dreams have become a little more…… fun.”
Yeah, wicker is a real turn on….NOT!!
yep. I thought everyone did it.
You mean they don’t?
Rosetta, I have a lovely candidate for a rant for you. Pretty please would you rip a new one for my friend’s soon-to-be ex-wife, who left him after 25 years of marriage for a guy she dated in high school for less than two weeks. Left him with their two kids. He has to sell the house. (Probably rather sell the kids, since they are teenagers.) Then she calls him to tell him how great she is doing and how much better life is. “Bitch” is a given, I’m trying to come up with something more creative like “ass-potato felcher”.
Can I have a name? Not the real one of course. I just need a name.
Pretty please would you rip a new one for my friend’s soon-to-be ex-wife,
Well, I think we all know the best description for here, don’t we?
See you next Tuesday.
Yeah, wicker is a real turn on….NOT!!
Wicker? Oh, yeah, you are sitting in …something…
I didn’t notice. Couldn’t get past the brilliant smile and the beautiful blonde hair.
Rosetta go for RFH friends exwife. She sounds like a selfish skank ho.
Hahahahaha! Hey Mom, what’s for dinner?
“french dip sandwiches with some other crap”
YUM!!! Thanks Mom!!
Nope. You’re not there. Just Burl.
Okay, you got me. I was looking in your window.
I saw it done in Mexico when I was 20 and have been doing it since.
sohitia, the pic of the dogs is funnny
we should caption it
(i think one of them is smiling, or on crack)
I saw it done in Mexico when I was 20
Too bad xbrad isn’t here. He would LOVE that picture.
Xbrad: “sooooooo, who’s your hot friends, sohita?”
Thats my buddy Lefty. Cool chic!
Nancy Pelosi during Botox
“WHEN I MAKE CRAP, YOU’RE GOING TO EAT IT AND YOU’RE GOING TO LIKE IT.”
Nancy Pelosi after Botox
Thats my buddy Lefty.
Chainsaw accident?
AHHHHHHHH My eyes! My eyes!!!!!!
I would hit Tushy but I cant see!
Where is xbrad? Church night is Wednesday.
Her real name is Leslie but when wasted lefty is so much better, and it stuck.
Where is xbrad? Church night is Wednesday.
Thursday is “lurk in the bushes outside Folly’s house night.”
“Thursday is “lurk in the bushes outside Folly’s house night.””
hahahahah Good one, Sean.
Rosetta, let’s call her Jen. Not her real name, but close enough. She put my friend through God knows how many marriage counseling sessions, even stood up in front of the church to renew their marriage vows, all the time skyping the high school flame and counting down the days to her “escape”.
so, Rosie said he had an idea for some fun here tonight.
Was it to pass out drunk on his keyboard, with his pants around his ankles, again?
Wiser, did you lose any weight on vacation? I’m thinking of doing the “alcohol only” diet and I was wondering if it works.
Date: May 7, 2009
To: RFH’S friend’s soon to be ex-wife
From: RFH’S friend
Dear Fucking Whore,
Although I never claimed to be the sharpest tool in the shed, after 25 years I have concluded the following: your love for the rubberfist of some pimply-faced cocksucker from high school, in your deck of retard cards, trumps our marriage and your children.
Although this caused me great pain at first, now that I know you’re a fucking idiot, I appreciate your selflessness in leaving our kids so they don’t have to spend anymore time with a diseased slattern of a mother.
Although it will take me several minutes to find someone that will replace you in my bed and my heart, I hope you know that it will take several hours for our kids to find a better mother and a better wife for their father.
As you pursue your new life with the guy with the kick-ass Camaro Iroc-Z with the T-tops that you blew that one time after too much Mad Dog, just remember that when he kicks your fat ass to the curb, all you’ll be left with is your 8-track of Foghat, a reamed out asshole and the shame of knowing that you picked a fantasy over a reality that was outstanding.
Good riddance, bitch. May the warm sensation you feel be the seeping sores of your herpes simplex 2.
Also, fuck off.
“Dear Fucking Whore,”
Excellent start!
“Also, fuck off.”
Strong finish.
Whatta fucking bitch, roamy. I hope she and her high school dickhead beau die in a fire.
Karma
Wiser, did you lose any weight on vacation?
heh. I wish.
But go for it, mare. I figure it’s worth a try. And even if you don’t lose an ounce, you really won’t care!
BEAUTIFUL!!!!!
You have a talent, Rosie.
Was it to pass out drunk on his keyboard, with his pants around his ankles, again?
FUN!!!!!!
Joke thread you ignorant slut??
No fish bites tonight.
Joke thread you ignorant slut??
Bring it, bitch!
Let’s see what you got!!!
Dear Rosetta,
I seriously think you should start a blog that is really like a “rant a day.” You have a well honed talent for cutting to the quick and doing it with irreverence and well deserved mockery. I obviously think you are funny here, however, your skills could be used on a separate blog for the purpose of informing and entertaining.
It only took you a few minutes to expertly rip RFH friends wife, it wouldn’t take too much time for you to do it daily. I would especially like it if you concentrated on politicians and headline makers like skank ho actresses and the like.
Sincerely,
Your biggest fan,
Mare
Fish bites with ketchup are really good.
No wait…that’s fish sticks.
I’ma go get ready for dinner (teriyaki steak) and watch Jeopardy. Nobody say anything libelous until I get back.
“But go for it, mare. I figure it’s worth a try. And even if you don’t lose an ounce, you really won’t care!”
Wiser, I’ve always liked your attitude!
Wiser, I’ve always liked your attitude!
wiserbud ♥ mare.
I have not had a drink this week, I think I want one now. Can I get anyone something?
I need another budlight
Thanks, Vmax, I would prefer a picture of Zeke.
It only took you a few minutes to expertly rip RFH friends wife, it wouldn’t take too much time for you to do it daily. I would especially like it if you concentrated on politicians and headline makers like skank ho actresses and the like.
Sincerely,
Your biggest fan,
Mare
Hahahahaha. I love the formal letter bit.
My Dearest Mare,
Your appreciation of my tirades is but one of a thousand reasons for my affection for you. However, I must respectfully disagree with your thought that I give a daily rant.
As a happy, optimistic person that loves to laugh and have fun, I take no pleasure in vulgar, insulting rants. Okay that’s not true. I take some pleasure in venting my spleen on the motherfuckers in this world that need to be beaten down and then Tazed in the neck, but with each rant, I lose a little of myself.
So with your agreement, I will save the bile and the meanness for those rare occasions when it needs to be released.
All my love,
Rosetta
P.S. FUCK WICKER!!!!!
I seriously think you should start a blog that is really like a “rant a day.” You have a well honed talent for cutting to the quick and doing it with irreverence and well deserved mockery. I obviously think you are funny here, however, your skills could be used on a separate blog for the purpose of informing and entertaining.
I’m in. In keeping with our theme, should it be called “The Sunlight Room”?
should it be called “The Sunlight Room”?
Happy Happy Fun Time Blog!
AKK, did you use Wonder bread or hot dogs for bait?
Who’s turn is it to get me a beer? My turn??
DAMMIT!!!
WAIT A MINUTE YOU DICK!!!!
Dear Rosetta,
I of course agree to put the subject to rest until such time that I can no longer go on without a blog specifically suited to your talents. I too am an optimist and when you rant I lose a piece of myself. The piece (at least that day) that makes me want to stab someone in the face. It’s as if you were a release valve that reduces the frustration I may have had toward some particular asshole. For that, I am grateful.
Regardless, I will continue to read Hostages for the laughs and the faint hope that you may find it necessary to wail on some unsuspecting dupe about the head and neck.
Thank you for your consideration,
Mare
Vmax, I’m drinking Beck’s. Want one?
p.s. Wicker is indeed SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am like BASF in the kitchen.
I don’t make the Rice-A-Roni, I make it better when I make it a one-dish meal.
I don’t make the frozen cheese pizza, I make it better with slices of grilled chicken and diced fresh tomato and extra cheese.
Hahahahaha!! Okay I need a joke thread.
Any ideas?
Sorry Sorry Food Time Blog?
You had a bunch of good ideas for a joke thread a couple of days ago.
Rosetta, you want a Beck’s or something else? I got these Brooklyn Pennant beers that everyone’s ignoring. I also have Heineken, Leinenkugel, and home brew.
There were a few ideas a couple of days ago that were decent.
Of course, I don’t remember what they were.
Thank you for your consideration,
Hahahahahaha.
Richard? Joke thread?
Vmax, I have not had a drink in a week either.
Good rant, Rosetta. However, from a purely monetary point of view, it’s bitches like that who keep me employed. If I represented Dad, she’d get supervised visitation.
Xbrad went to visit his mother.
I also have Heineken, Leinenkugel, and home brew.
home brew?
PARTY AT RFH’s HOUSE!!
“Of course, I don’t remember what they were.”
Me either…alcohol?
“Xbrad went to visit his mother.”
Thanks, Folly.
Vmax!!! Where’s a picture of Zeke?
Uploading them now Mare
(2) Worst name for a boy band
or
(4) Most inappropiate way to tell your kids that you’re getting a divorce
I forgot what those ideas were. Here are some newbies. And RFH, I will take a raincheck on the beer until we meet and then you can get me drunk. Bring extra money.
Best reason to get fired
Most inappropriate question to ask Obama
Worst Holidays
Okay someone choose and please start a new thread. I need a smoke.
(2) Worst name for a boy band
or
(4) Most inappropiate way to tell your kids that you’re getting a divorce
Hahahahaha. Those are good.
Hahahahaha. Those are good.
they’re yours, stupid.
they’re yours, stupid.
*snicker*
I love it when you talk dirty, Wiser.
okay, new thread in a sec.
Worst name for a boy band.
Save your brilliance for the new thread
I love it when you talk
dirty, Wiser.FTFY
they’re yours, stupid.
I figured they were because they were funny, dummy.
Do you remember how to put up a new post?
Well hurry up, wiserbud. I don’t have all day.
GO TO NEW THREAD……………………………………
.
.
.
.
.
.
wait for it……
.
.
.
.
.
NOW!
Here you are Mare
I titled this one, Hey! Come out and Play!
This one He dropped the stick and was looking for something else to chew on
“Hey, come out and play” makes me have a big smiley face.