Nothing happens on February 28th, judging by the list of events for the day. I couldn’t find a single thing to celebrate.
So, to start The Most Boring BBF Evah!™, we will begin with a compilation of the best Vines from September, 2013 instead of a video. Enjoy!
In keeping with the theme, today’s model isn’t famous for anything, other than being on social media. She calls herself a swimwear model, but I didn’t see any ads in my extensive research. But she does love Tumblr! Everybody welcome Brittany Santos!
Quite a comely lass, wouldn’t you say?
I shouldn’t say nothing happened today, it’s just nothing really interesting:
1700 – Today is followed by March 1 in Sweden, thus creating the Swedish calendar.
1883 – The first vaudeville theater opens in Boston
1885 – The American Telephone and Telegraph Company is incorporated in New York State as the subsidiary of American Bell Telephone. (American Bell would later merge with its subsidiary.)
1928 – C.V. Raman discovers Raman effect.
1939 – The erroneous word “dord” is discovered in the Webster’s New International Dictionary, Second Edition, prompting an investigation.
1940 – Basketball is televised for the first time (Fordham University vs. the University of Pittsburgh in Madison Square Garden).
1953 – James D. Watson and Francis Crick announce to friends that they have determined the chemical structure of DNA; the formal announcement takes place on April 25 following publication in April’s Nature (pub. April 2).
1954 – The first color television sets using the NTSC standard are offered for sale to the general public.
1980 – Andalusia approves its statute of autonomy through a referendum.
1991 – The first Gulf War ends.
1998 – First flight of RQ-4 Global Hawk, the first unmanned aerial vehicle certified to file its own flight plans and fly regularly in U.S. civilian airspace.
2013 – Pope Benedict XVI resigns as the pope of the Catholic Church becoming the first pope to do so since 1415.
Have a lovely Friday!
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Flawlessly naming puppies since March 2009 
*still sleeping
Sums it up: http://tinyurl.com/mz7vcd5
hahahahahahah! Let’s not, Nancy.
Thanks, Carin & Jimbro. I keep trying to take a step back and put things in perspective. I signed on for this. I’m just an old grump, but I’m trying to be nicer, especially in light of mom’s challenges. Her behavior really tries me these days – she’s really, really over-emotive, so the stories she can tell are melodramatic, her affect is overpowering, and her emotional responses are a bit disproportionate. I try treat her as “normally” as possible, yet the new normal is nothing familiar to me. I’ll get the hang of this eventually, though. I just have to check my shit.
She seems nice boobs.
Pretty Plumeria! Niiiice work, J’ames!
And g’morning.
When dealing with my dad, I really just had to take a step back and become non-emotive regarding what was going on. Decisions needed to me made, things needed to be done. When he would say wacking things, I’d just roll my eyes inwardly.
I know that’s what I have to do, Carin. It doesn’t come easily to me. You’re right, though.
My dad is having a harder time getting around, due to his artificial hip acting up again. It’s not at the level that others are seeing in their parents, but it’s hard to watch.
As part of his head injury he had an open skull fracture which gave him meningitis. He required three simultaneous antibiotics of which two were potentially ototoxic. To no one’s surprise, he ended up deaf. They did a cochlear implant which worked fairly well. Over the years we enjoyed the times where he would act like he heard nothing and then jump in with a wise ass comment out of the blue proving he was listening all along.
Is Pretty Plumeria a euphemism for something? If not it should be.
So, here’s two pics of Jazz from the late 80s or so.
The first pic is from about 1987. My buddy in the pic shared the same birthday with me. He’s dead a couple of years now of leukemia. He’s sitting on my bike in the pic, and I had just brought back another buddy’s bike from a test ride (I ended up buying it).
The other pic dates to about 1989-90. That guy in the pic with me is Tadashi Yamashita, who tested me for 3 of my black belt ranks. He’s been in a few movies, most notably as Chuck Norris’ evil brother, Seikura, in “The Octagon.”
Those are pretty much the only pics of myself from that time, except for one more I can find of me looking all biker-ed up with crazy hair and a ZZ Top beard, and I’m smoking a big fat jay. Even if I found it, I prolly wouldn’t post it. 😉
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2569288/Are-right-brained-left-brained-And-does-say-personality-Take-interactive-QUIZ-out.html
I use mine equally.
Jimbro, my mom did the same thing with my dad until he started getting violent. After a while she transferred him to a brand new Alzheimer’s facility in Utah. The care there cost 50% less, and my brother was nearby.
It’s not at the level that others are seeing in their parents, but it’s hard to watch.
There’s no way to compare sadness. We all know what’s up, and it all sucks. We just have to be there for them and enjoy them while we’ve got’m. 🙂
Why are you so sweaty?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8T2MTv5ri0
Jazz was a badd ass.
There’s no way to compare sadness. We all know what’s up, and it all sucks. We just have to be there for them and enjoy them while we’ve got’m. 🙂
I also didn’t want to let MY issues interfere with the right choices. As I said at the time time it’s not about me. I wasn’t 100% selfless, but then I needed to keep my sanity, and I do have five kids that needed care, etc.
All in alll, my dad got the best HERE than he would have anywhere else.
FIL is still with us, much to my amazement. I didn’t think he would make it to Christmas.
I look so young in those pics – and thin!
That’s my thought when I look at my old pictures too Jazz.
I use mine equally.
HAHAHAHA – I’m 91% left-brained.
What’s weird, is, I’m a southpaw.
Thanks Jay. She’s nice boobs.
11 year old cougar hunter!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2568771/Girl-11-shoots-cougar-following-brother-14-home-making-THIRD-mountain-cat-killed-one-week.html
We should add one of Jazz’s pics to the yearbook page. That was fun looking at those again, until I realized that there could be a 30th class reunion for me this year. Oy.
11 year old cougar hunter!
That is SO cool!
Liberal heads essplode!
We should add one of Jazz’s pics to the yearbook page.
Feel free.
Hi. This will wake you up.
http://m.hugelol.com/lol/116227
Read: “I will do everything possible to restore law enforcement’s authority to prevent the public from lawfully exercising Constitutional rights.”
Read: “OH, NOES! PANIC!”
Oops – link: http://bit.ly/1fYAW1h
Got a “Final Notice” from Sallie Mae yesterday. Confirmed that the fraud investigation started after it would have gone in the mail.
I’m going end up in court over this at some point, I’m sure. Not with Sallie Mae, but with the other guy they sold the loan to before the investigation exonerated me.
It’s Clownifornia. The Constitution here is merely a quaint anachronism, like a public phone booth, or getting married before having children.
Kerry Kennedy: Not guilty.
It’s good to be connected.
Laws are for the little people.
Obama, the Magic Law Fairy!
http://apne.ws/NCFvHD
Who needs a legislature?
Kerry Kennedy: Not guilty.
It’s good to be connected.
Heh – I was just reading THIS, too:
http://yhoo.it/NCGaZv
Workie workie. Late start today.
Hahahahahahaha
HotBride just texted me “Is John McCain a democrat?”
I responded: “Depends what day of the week it is.”
I’m not sure why she asked. Should make for an interesting dinner discussion.
Hey, want to have the crap scared right out of you? Listen to especially the last ten minutes of today’s podcast at http://www.coffeeandmarkets.com
It’s not about the Netflix story but the permanent two-tier economy, the death of employment and the rise of DC as the center of coercive economic power.
I think Francis C. is correct and the country is on a steady train headed towards centralized tyranny.
Just sat down at the desk of my third job I’ve gone to today.
Drove by Scott and Lauraw’s house on the way here. Waved.
Bastards didn’t wave back.
The average medieval serf had less interaction with his or her (much less powerful) government than any one of us has.
Which reminds me, for security reasons on my new job, I’m required to permit a credit check.
If the Sallie Mae fraud causes me any trouble, I’m going to take it as a sign from God that it’s time to stop being a government contractor.
Hahahahahahahaha
Leon, check out this real live pic of Rebekah Warren.
http://www.mlive.com/lansing-news/index.ssf/2014/02/state_sen_rebekah_warren_forms.html#incart_river_default
The Ninth Circus ruled in favor of the Constitution? What planet am I on?
Bastards didn’t wave back.
scott didn’t quite have the front sight just right, then
Where is this job?
Did Becky have a stroke?
I’m convinced, I’m voting for Becky in the primary. Her name isn’t Dingell.
Bowman in the general, of couse.
I’m not voting. We’re getting the gold digger.
Which one? They both married into it.
I like to vote in primaries, it’s the only time I see my neighbors.
Congress and President is becoming a hereditary position, isn’t it?
http://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/index.ssf/2014/02/debbie_dingell_launches_campai.html#incart_river_default
Where is this job?
Glastonbury
Oh yay, it won’t be above freezing again until March 7.
<I’m going to take it as a sign from God that it’s time to stop being a government contractor.
In the future, the only work will be with the government.
We’re getting the gold digger
Congress and President is becoming a hereditary position, isn’t it?
It’s not like most elections have made much difference lately, anyhow.
President Malia!
The first unwed mother to become president.
At this point, we ought to consider inviting back George III.
Hey, his urine was blue, so he already has a built-in meme factor.
In the future, the only work will be with the government.
Subsistence farming and EBT for me. I’ll cash out my 401k and pay off the farm and my car, then go into full-time farmblogging.
Just how historic will it be, having the first single mom president?
But who will be more historic, the first fairy president or the first whore president?
The first unwed mother to become president.
WHAT??!? Do you think her parents would allow her to be punished with a baby????
First woman to have had an abortion to become President.
First woman to have had an abortion to become President.
Your very words have just caused thousands of NOW members to have spontaneous multiple orgasms.
Your very words have just caused thousands of NOW members to have spontaneous multiple orgasms.
worked better than lesbo pron starring Hillary Clinton and Janet Reno.
Maybe we’ll find out on the Letterman Show that she visited NYC and A-Rod popped a boner and she got knocked up.
Hey… how about first undocumented DREAMer President?
Judicial Watch told Secrets that the sky-high jet travel costs for the first family’s 2012-2013 Christmas vacation in Hawaii, their beach vacation on Martha’s Vineyard last summer and President Obama’s brief trip to California in August totalled $7,396,531.20.
A higher minimum wage can solve this.
…A-Rod popped a boner and she got knocked up
Not possible. Shrunken testicles, doncha know.
Hey… how about first undocumented DREAMer President?
It’s been done.
http://tinyurl.com/mpae5vy
I wonder if Michelle or Hillary had a shmashmorshon?
first lady Michelle Obama tried to identify with women who do the grocery shopping for their families…
“So there you stood, alone in some aisle in a store, the clock ticking away at the precious little time remaining to complete your weekly grocery shopping, and all you could do was scratch your head, confused and bewildered, and wonder, is there too much sugar in this product?”
“Why are you women so stupid and helpless? Here, let my superior intellect choose your food, you losers. Someday in our bright future, this will be mandatory.”
That video of Ben Shapiro at UCLA is awesome, if you haven’t seen it:
Some say Hillary has a brain tumor.
http://bit.ly/1hvUPAd
I won’t argue.
Every time Michelle opens her yap, I hate her more.
Jazz, she looks like crap.
Judicial Watch told Secrets that the sky-high jet travel costs for the first family’s 2012-2013 Christmas vacation in Hawaii, their beach vacation on Martha’s Vineyard last summer and President Obama’s brief trip to California in August totalled $7,396,531.20.
Well, to be fair, the Era of Austerity is officially over, according to the White House
If you’re buying a “product” at the grocery store, chances are you’re already boned. Unless it’s bacon.
is there too much sugar in this product?
Too much sugar for what, Ms. IMAX Ass?
Geek night at the White House: Showing all 6 Star Wars films side by side simultaneously on Michelle’s ass
What is the zip code for Michelle’s ass? I want to send it a postcard.
Leon, it’s wrong on so many levels.
1) if you are buying pre-packaged crap at the store, and don’t know that it is MOST LIKELY NOT GOOD FOR YOU, you are stupid.
2) people know that crap isn’t good for them, but what it anyway.
3) Michelle Obama thinks we’re stupid. Honestly? I’m scratching my head trying to find the sugar content of “Sugar Smacks”?
Fuck you Michelle.
Showing all 6 Star Wars films side by side simultaneously on Michelle’s ass
While this screen is certainly more than large enough, it is not the ideal reflective surface.
I have a god-given right to inhale THC, but not to eat Hot Pockets.
That makes sense.
This slogan will win every election forever:
I promise to leave you alone.
I have a god-given right to inhale THC, but not to eat Hot Pockets.
It turns out the opiate of the masses is, in fact, cannabis sativa.
*smokes hot pockets
sky-high jet travel costs for the first family… totalled $7,396,531.20
Just setting the baseline for future travel budgeting.
MJ, that was almost Perry’s slogan: “I will make the Federal Government as inconsequential to your life as possible”. Unfortunately, he had some medication issues. And he sounded too much like BOOOOOOSH when he talked.
I used to smoke Hot Pockets but the ash got grease on my clothes.
Who can take a g-string
Wrap it in a sigh
Put it in his rectum
and make asspotato pie
The Pantyman.
The Pantyman can.
http://cbsloc.al/1fwqC5z
*smokes a twinkie
*smokes a twinkie
You misspelled “twink”
This is how far we’ve fallen. Eating a fried twinkie is now a political act of defiance.
I won’t do it, and I don’t think you should, but I will defend to the death your right to do so. I really, really shouldn’t have to, though.
Jazz owes me a brand fucking new keyboard. Bastard.
Perry never had a chance.
I believe Jerrerson put it best when he said, “Never, gentleman, deign to believe that a man who once hunted upon grounds that had a rock with a bad word on it can be President of the United States.”
You misspelled “twink”
Or twerk.
Hahahahaha. Shut up.
Perry has been in Iowa for 2 days. The media is buzzing with Presidential Run talk.
Perry is unelectable.
Palin is unelectable. Perry still has a shot.
“Candyman/Pantyman” is on a loop in my head now. Freakin’ earworm. I loved Gene Wilder’s “Willie Wonka”
“Things Jerrerson Said?”
I’m not familiar with that book.
I’m not familiar with that book.
He wrote it on the walls of his de-rux apartment in the sky.
Probably Jefferson, you lacist plick
FFS, it was George Jefferson.
He said it to Archie Bunker in Season 3, Episode 4: “Archie Runs for President After Hunting in Upstate NY on Land Leased by a Relative that Used to Have a Rock With a Bad Word on it 20 Years Ago.”
Summary: Archie cuts all of the hair off of meathead because he was gay, but married to his daughter. Then he goes hunting for dingbats in upstate NY.
Those were the days.
I have a boulder in my backyard painted with the word “peckerwood,” but it’s a white rock, so no biggie.
Joe Biden is motivating the GOP. Democrats.org and Sheriff Joe just sent me this email!
Jay —
This is our last chance to elect a Congress that will work with Barack — if we don’t get this right, we won’t get another opportunity.
Wait, what?
I think he means Barack doesn’t plan to run again.
I know, I’m just trying a really weak joke.
Joe Biden literally doesn’t understand the meaning of the word literally.
It played better in my head. Guess it should have stayed there.
You don’t need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.
Guess it should have stayed there.
Probably true for half the shit on this blog.
You don’t need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.
Yes, you do.
* typical moonbat that couldn’t tell you which way was east at sunrise.
* throws 4 bullwhips on table *
Some say Hillary has a brain tumor.
A ruse. Poor widdle victim positioning herself for sympathy. You can’t attack a victim for her criminal deeds, can you? That would be mean.
She comes out swinging at her campaign announcement.
She’s done it how many times?
This morning my toast told me that I am a fine figure of a man. My eggs said that the beard was a good look for me.
I could really get used to these complimentary breakfasts.
Scott, how are the gun confiscation/surrender letters going over in CT?
* throws 4 bullwhips on table *
Tell me that you washed those before putting them on the table.
I don’t think they have gone out yet.
I predict that 85% of all scary guns have been given away.
* throws 4 bullwhips on table *
Just a dog whistle for Wiserbud.
* throws 4 bullwhips on table *
Means you still have half a dozen shoved up your ass….
Did I hear something?
I predict that 85% of all scary guns have been given away.
Or lost in unfortunate boating accidents…..
Cyn?
Lucky Pupster, I only ever get the complementary breakfasts, and there’s usually nothing I can even eat.
I listened to a phone call to some cop supposedly from a woman. I swear to God it was actually Gabe.
Parents, if you are ever in Boston, and your child gets sick, don’t take them to Boston’s Children’s Hospital.
They’ll take your kid away from you if you disagree with their diagnosis.
HS, was it the one where she questioned the legality of the law and the cop called her “Anti-American”?
Yeah, Oso. Sounded just like Gabe.
The same dickbrain cop also claimed that cops were the masters.
OK, I just listened again and now I’m laughing.
Famed Sandy Hook CT State Police spokesman Lt Vance
Dear Lord – been going back and forth with some woman on my daughter’s FB page about the Gay Marriage ban in Texas being unconstitutional (it is, and it’s going to get tossed out). Finally gets to the point where she tosses out the “I’m a lawyer” bit after attempting to shove two pieces of legislation at me to prove her point.
Which neither one did – and I was kind enough to explain to her why.
But she was so sure that she was right that she had to toss in the bit about her “Constitutional Law” class.
I didn’t tell her what I REALLY thought about the state of Constitutional Law classes over the last 20-30 years.
I did suggest that she might want to read over what she sent me, though….
Ben Shapiro lights up the leftist cunts at UCLA:
Barack Obama is a lawyer too – supposedly a constitutional lawyer. You may want to point that out to her, so she understands that her professional status is irrelevant.
She is also a Gay Jew. In California.
And apparently California is juuuuuust fine with Gay Marriage – that pesky Proposition 8 was passed because of all of the Mormons in Utah coming over and stirring up the waters.
(I guess they let folks from Utah vote in California now, seeing as all of those enlightened Californians couldn’t possibly have voted for that bigoted piece of legislation….)
Prop 8 was passed by Catholic illegals and black churches in LA. Mormons are just the Christian bakers, florists, photographers, in the equation. Least likely to fight back. Still needed a gay judge to impose SSM on the people.
Eventually every group that wants to be equal demands to worshipped.
*demands to be worshipped
http://mcphee.com/shop/horse-head-squirrel-feeder.html
Pupster found Mare.
I just want to be more equal than everybody else.
omg, that feeder is hilaaaarious
=====================================================
^ my new bumper sticker
Oh, God no, HS – the last thing I needed was for her to start accusing me of blatant racism. I’m sure that to her the sun rises and sets on the Chocolate Messiah (PBUH).
She quit harassing me (for now) after I took the part of one law that she had conveniently highlighted for me (to prove her point that I was wrong) and pointed out to her that the legislation in question only included what we were talking about in a very narrow interpretation, and then it was only talking about providing accessibility for people with mobile issues, not civil rights for gays who want to harass bakers and photographers.
I told her to scroll up a page – like the non-lawyer (me) did – to see how the highlighted part applied in the larger context of the subsection of the legislation.
I don’t think she was amused.
I’m going to put this on my car:
>=
8=========D
I’m going to eat Cheetos and try not to think anymore today.
= ∞
How can I have equality with everybody else when that dick MJ has such a nice condo? And Oso has Cheetos, and I don’t?
≠ ≠ ≠ ≠ ≠
Oso has Cheetos?
Puffy or crunchy?
Here’s a link to the conversation – that stuff is at the tail end of the convo:
http://is.gd/5HRJwa
I tried to be civil, but by the end of the discussion, my snarky inner bitch was straining to be let off the leash….
My Lincoln rental car ≈ Sean’s huge penis
Crunchy. Bought them at Sam’s. I’m drowning my sorrows. Dan is making brats and sauerkraut for dinner. Ugh! He hasn’t installed the new microwave yet. I may starve.
Not available Teresa.
Comment by beasn on February 28, 2014 1:54 pm
Some say Hillary has a brain tumor.
A ruse.
Yes, but brain tumors ALWAYS come back.
Who knows when that other shoe might drop?
(I’m just giving the GOP some ammunition, in case she tries to run with this gimmick)
Maybe because it’s on my daughter’s FB page; don’t know what her settings are.
Oh, well….
It’s possible that I’m done with work for the day.
Thanks for putting this post together, Jay. You’re quite the sporting chap.
I really like the new Lincolns, Pupster. You get a lot of car for the money.
Lincolns are racist.
Just went and picked up new dog pens in preparation for the new pup. I may have to revive my old blog just to give me a place to post pictures and vids when she arrives.
I’m starting to settle on a name of “Kora” – an Aboriginal word for companion.
Kora?
I thought we decided on Bullwhip?
You should name it alahu akbar, and wear a vest when you are training it.
Here splodey splodey splodey. Here boy!
I think laura should do BBF next week. To see if she got any better from last time.
I thought we decided on Bullwhip?
What do you mean by “we”, kemosabe?
OMG, y’all – Jada Pinkett Smith gained 8-10 pounds, but she’s decided to embrace her “fuller” figure:
http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/jada-pinkett-smith-embraces-weight-gain-article-1.1703885
Gracious me, she’s such a cow now….
By we I mean me.
My god, she’s udderly bovine.
Is Willow the pot-smoking philosopher or the bi-sexual kid? I get their parenting successes mixed up/
I thought bisexuals didn’t really exist anymore, as they were merely gay people who were lying to themselves.
I think if your bi now you’re denying that your just promiscuous.
Or that you really, really, want to be gay but are afraid.
I can’t keep it straight.
I’m guessing she’s the bi-sexual one – I doubt Mr. Smith wants to be known as the father of a boy on the down-low.
Of course, this means that kid #3 will have to be transgendered.
Got to check off all of the politically correct boxes to stay on the front page in Hollyweird.
She was 12 when she said it. I just want them all to go away and leave my movies alone. Did you see the Karate Kid remake?
My wife made me watch it. I was disgusted.
Black beating up a bunch of Chinese and I’m supposed to cheer for that? RAYCISS!
Elizabeth Shoe. Man, she was hot.
Shue.
She had a thong scene in Hollow Man.
The Shue family are a bunch of acting/soccer nerds. Shun!!
Holy crap she’s 50.
I’d still hit it.
I guess 11 million Mexicans had an “Uncontested arrival” in the US and it is totes the same as Russians in the Crimea. Totes.
Before I refreshed the page I said to myself, ‘MJ you can bet all of your money that Leon will put ‘Shue’ in a comment.’
Shoulda found someone to take that bet.
*adjusts pocket protector*
There’s a gym on the top floor of this building. It’s small, but has everything I need.
Plus everyone that lives here is about HS age so I have it all to myself.
I really like the new Lincolns, Pupster.
I really like this MKS…drove it through OH and KY and TN. Must have.
I would be terrified to deadlift on the top floor.
I’m getting a V8 in my next car. Fuck it.
DD#2 got another traffic ticket that she decided to ignore (until they sent a note to her permanent address)
*SIGHHHHHH*
Greetings, people who are better equipped to deal with winter weather.
Getting cold in Cali, Sean?
The new backsplash will be sealed tomorrow. The kitchen is looking great.
Not especially cold, but really wet. We’re getting all of the rain we normally get through the month of February in the course of two days.
Oh, and the guy who was here before me said that the power had gone out four times today. Good times. Good times.
They had to close Rivers of America and Tom Sawyer Island at DL.
The new backsplash will be sealed tomorrow. The kitchen is looking great.
——————————
Someone mentioned that you had poured concrete counters. Is this correct?
Afternoon.
They ended up getting the penis counters. Accidentally.
Today I built one (1) of these:
http://tinyurl.com/bm49fw2
but in MJ’s size.
but in MJ’s size.
———————–
Handsome is a size now? Cool.
Good column by Tammy Bruce.
http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2014/feb/28/brucethe-veto-of-arizonas-religious-freedom-bill-i/
“As a gay conservative woman, I supported Arizona’s religious freedom bill, which was just vetoed this week by Gov. Jan Brewer.
I supported it because it embodied the values every American civil rights movement stood for: the freedom to live our lives without being punished for who we are.
In this case, it was a bill making sure people of faith would not be forced to violate their religious beliefs in the event someone demanded they do so….
…..Having been a liberal “community organizer” in my past, I immediately recognized the strategy being employed. This is an effort to condition the public into automatically equating faith with bigotry…..
….If we are able to coerce someone, via the threat of lawsuit and personal destruction, to provide a service, how is that not slavery? If we insist that you must violate your faith specifically in that slavish action, how is that not abject tyranny?
Of all the people in the world who should understand the scourge of living under constant threat of losing life, liberty or the ability to make a living because of who you are, it’s gays. It has been disgusting to watch supposed gay “leadership” drag young gays and lesbians through an indoctrination that insists that in order to have equality, you must force other people to do your will, make them betray who they are, and punish them if they offend you.
Shortly after I started at the factory, R in Machines started joking about me being Jewish, and I played along. Today I found out everybody thinks I am.
It might be time to step up my game. I’m considering getting my hair did like this:
http://tinyurl.com/k539nmq
*forces beasn to worship George Michael.
Shortly after I started at the factory, R in Machines started joking about me being Jewish, and I played along. Today I found out everybody thinks I am.
————————-
I realize May is looming, but when is Yom Kippur or Rosh Hashana?
Extra day off.
*forces beasn to worship George Michael.
He WILL be your father figure.
I think they’re in Sept. He has Passover coming up.
Rosh Hashana is September. I think Purim is a big deal too.
Pogo is settled into the rehab place. Not nearly as nice as the hospital. Semi-private room. Her roommate has some dementia and a tendency to shit her pants.
http://www.chabad.org/holidays/default_cdo/year/2014/jewish/2014-Holidays.htm
Lotta people think I’m Jewish too. Last name fools them.
There are actually people out here hitting golf balls. I know addicts when I see ’em.
*debriefs and flops onto the couch*
SeaM, I hope your house doesn’t get buried in a mudslide. That would suck.
My Lincoln rental car ≈ Sean’s huge penis
http://bit.ly/1dKBgAe
Jimbro’s last name is “Zimmerman”?
“Bro” is Jewish, Jim?? Hunh.
People think bro is Jewish sounding? Weird.
XBrad
http://therealrevo.com/blog/?p=113386#more-113386
Broi vey!
*sideways stares at Cyn.
*stares sideways back at MJ and waggles eyebrows*
I really should trim those suckers.
My Lincoln rental car ≈ Sean’s huge penis
http://bit.ly/1dKBgAe
Nailed. It.
Just had to unclog all four downspouts. Plus the runoff pushed a neighbor’s garbage can two doors down onto our corner.
SeaM, I hope your house doesn’t get buried in a mudslide. That would suck.
That would indeed suck. But my house isn’t in a burn area, so I think it’ll be okay.
Good to hear Sean.
How ’bout you, George? Are you “safe”?
I’m mainly worried about potential leaks in the house (automatic jinx? there are none now) and keeping the gutters working. I don’t like the bargeboards and fascia getting so soaked, but that’s what the exterior is for. There’s a few spots where the bargeboard could be replaced in small sections. I did extensive maintenance caulking around windows and on some exterior wood before the rain hit. The very expensive hardscaping drainage appears to be working. It’s been discharging a lot of water from the front and east side of the house.
“bro” is code. The Tribe knows.
Pepe, I posted on that the other day.
You can tell a bro from the Jew ‘fro.
GO, go outside in the rain and post H8 house pics for us. Chop. Chop.
Pogo is settled into the rehab place. Not nearly as nice as the hospital. Semi-private room. Her roommate has some dementia and a tendency to shit her pants.
So… It’s a lot like being at home, then.
I donated some bucks to the museum. They want more.
Pogo is settled into the rehab place.
The news on her recovery just keeps getting better. That’s fantastic!
Warning: if you buy a phone off of Amazon for a Verizon account, you have stay with Verizon for 6 months or you owe Amazon $200 for the phone.
“Bro” is Jewish, Jim??
It’s yiddish for “effeminate gentile man,” and when one officially gets recognized as a big pussy, it’s called a “bro mitzvah.”
Jazz….hahaha.
BTW, Brad, that IS good news. She’s still getting the mentioned at daily Mass, though.
Good thing I checked those gutters. There were sixty or seventy feet of gutter brimming with water because the leaf guards had clogged. We get high winds up here and lots of debris settled over the dry winter. Yanked out the guards and the water rushed out.
When we moved in the gutters were worse. All of the downspouts were so stuffed with debris you could have planted bushes inside them.
The very expensive hardscaping drainage appears to be working. It’s been discharging a lot of water from the front and east side of the house.
———————–
French drains actually work.
Also, French’s mustard.
*forces beasn to worship George Michael.
Ya gotta have faith….
If it starts pouring again Oso, I’ll try. Right now the rain has let up.
Her roommate has some dementia and a tendency to shit her pants.
So… It’s a lot like being at home, then.
——————————–
Hahahahaha. Xbrad had a sex change?
Again?
French drains actually work.
Also, French’s mustard.
I’ll rub some on the gutters.
It’s yiddish for “effeminate gentile man,”
AKA Pajama Boy
So… It’s a lot like being at home, then.
http://tinyurl.com/kq3auzl
Wow, other than containing the words Bro Mitzvah, that video is unwatchable.
P.S. That’s in addition to the Verizon charge for ending a contract early, which is another $200. I can see why people like the pay-as-you-go phones. I should have gotten an Obamaphone.
Do French maids work?
Do French maids work?
—————
They work the shaft. Or so I’ve heard.
That was a great article, Beasn – thanks for the link!
FWIW, Verizon has great coverage.
Swallow the gravy?
I really, really need to watch that movie again. Ha Ha.
I think I’ve been roped into a few episodes of “24” off Amazon though. Rats.
I can see why people like the pay-as-you-go phones. I should have gotten an Obamaphone.
You’re in luck – your family’s combined income is just under the Obamaphone threshold – just sign up under the tent outside the ghetto grocery!
I switched to the WalMart Family Plan. It’s T-Mobile, and it works fine, and it’s about as inexpensive as plans come, with no repercussions for changing plans. I used MetroPCS for a while, too. I have no issues with either, but WMF is really inexpensive.
Garbage can of hate.
I saw French Drains open for Billy Ocean at the Icehouse in 1983.
Do French maids work?
They dust the bed.
I’m holding off on getting a new phone. Verizon doesn’t want to grandfather my unlimited text and data. May have to switch to Sprint for data even though their coverage isn’t as good.
After Dan researched phone plans for his parents and found some AARP Sears plan that has plans that aren’t about smart phones, text, or data, they forgot that they’d asked him to look.
They dust the bed.
——————————
Hahahahahahaha. One of my all-time favorite BBFs. Jesus, Rosetta is funny.
French dressing is gross.
I’ve got a plan with unlimited talk and text with no data (I quit my smart phone – I never used the fecking web on my phone after the novelty wore off) for $29 a month. I think the unlimited data brings the cost up to $35/mo.
Jesus, Rosetta is funny.
Who?
French dressing is gross
only when guys wear it.
FFS. 15 yr old is being tried as an adult in NM. Hid the body of the 12 yr old he killed under a mattress on the mesa. His mama is upset that her son is being tried as an adult. He has a baby that will be without his father. SMH.
AARP phones? There is one helluva annoying commercial that originally ran over three minutes long for “Consumer Cellular” boasting about being the official AARP phone plan. Featuring two very irritating retards driving around in their motor home. Any of you seen it?
French undressing is pretty awesome.
There is one helluva annoying commercial that originally ran over three minutes long for “Consumer Cellular” boasting about being the official AARP phone plan. Featuring two very irritating retards driving around in their motor home. Any of you seen it?
Yes. I turn the channel when it comes on. I wouldn’t do business with an AARP-affiliated anything if it were free. Screw that BS org.
That’s it!!! My inlaws are d-rats. I was told to stop scaring them.
Any of you seen it?
Nope. In completely unrelated news, I have a ton of misconceptions about reverse mortgages.
I have a ton of misconceptions about reverse mortgages.
Are you saying you do not have implicit trust in Fred Thompson, Robert Wagner and Henry Winkler?
I just don’t know if a reverse mortgage is right for me, Eric. I also don’t want my final expenses to be a burden for my loved ones, but I’m not sure if I can get affordable life insurance with my medical history.
Holy Kraken, it’s coming down like God has active bladder.
Brad when he was a little girl
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwXm68SaTNI&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Your best solution, Mr. Sean, is to make a phone call to one of our helpful representatives who will discuss all of your options free of charge or obligation. This won’t take more than three hours.
We can provide a term life policy to you for as little as 5 zloty per day, and there is no physical examination required, unless you insist.
Was there a time way back in the day when a phone call to a business actually carried the risk of some kind of obligation?
I suspect you are trying to make our outfit sound less than generous.
wtf is a Bro Mitzvah?
I bet that’s why people used to wear suits all the time. To take care of the obligations that came with making a phone call.
wtf is a Bro Mitzvah?
A coming-of-age ceremony for dyslexic Jews.
I mainly wear suits to avoid being arrested.
It might also help if I didn’t hang around in women’s restrooms.
I also don’t want my final expenses to be a burden for my loved ones,
Here’s what I tell my clients (I’m a probate and real estate attorney by experience): Prepay your funeral/burial. Fuck the rest. When I file a probate estate and publish the probate notice in the legal news, I deny every single claim made against the estate, meaning claimants prove debts in court before the estate will pay. 95% of claimants never file a claim in court, and the estates escape almost all obligations. I do this because I have no personal knowledge of the debt, and if the claimant isn’t willing to step up and do its part, I’m not just gonna pay out on the unproven say-so of some interloper.
Here you go TJ: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2847436/
Even your burial can be paid from your estate, though, without cost to your family.
This is very useful information to me, especially considering I’m dead.
wtf is a Bro Mitzvah?
Dude, don’t you know anything about Judaism?
Burial? La -Te- Da!
I am going old school, buzzards and crows.
I must have slept through that in Hebrew School
My worst nightmare. MS story of guy that was pronounced dead and woke up in the embalming bag at the funeral home.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bro_Mitzvah
TJ:
Is there a HeShebrew school yet?
bro-mitzvah is apparently a douchebag bachelor party.
I must have slept through that in Hebrew School
No, that’s covered in Hebro School.
Is there a HeShebrew school yet?
That’s Transbrew School, you awful, awful bigot.
Your best solution, Mr. Sean, is to make a phone call to one of our helpful representatives…
Verizon? Or pay-as-you-go?
Scott
I’m sure some fucking idiot Reform Rabbi is working on that as we speak.,
That’s Transbrew School, you awful, awful bigot.
I am tired of conservative oppressive Jews telling me I have to read the Torah from right to left. Too dextronormative.
The Torah is manga?
Hey… Jewish manga. Naruto meets Saul Bellow.
http://m.nydailynews.com/news/national/hot-mugshot-woman-sues-website-booking-pic-permission-ads-article-1.1706608
It’s getting so wet here the earthworms on the sidewalk have taken to using leaves as lifeboats.
Her lawyer, Matthew Crist, told the Times the behavior was akin to Colgate using Tom Cruise’s image to hawk toothpaste.
So she’s a scientologist?
What the hell? You guys have been bitching about drought forever.
YOU CAN’T BITCH ABOUT RAIN.
75 and rain. I hope you guys make it.
It’s getting so wet here the neighbors have started rounding up different kinds of pets in pairs, male and female.
They can bitch about rain, and Pepe and I can bitch about wind.
As I said earlier, scott, the problem is that we’re getting all the rain we normally would get over the course of February in two days.
Oh, I don’t bitch about rain. Just gutters.
It was 5 degrees when I got up today.
It’s raining at the driving range. CALL THE NATIONAL GUARD!
We had not only rain, but fairly high winds as well. There’s at least one tree down on the golf course. And our sun umbrella was blown over.
I know Sean.
The National Guard is busy protecting our precious Delta Smelt.
There’s at least one tree down on the golf course. And our sun umbrella was blown over.
I demand zero-interest federally guaranteed loans to compensate for this tragic loss. Why should Solyndra or Elon Musk have all the fun?
If I was in the hills, yeah, it might be an issue. But we’re not likely to get mudslides here.
Mrs Peel was making fun of us a couple years ago because Cat 1 hurricanes screw us up.
I”m running my sprinklers.
Ukraine?
According to the white-house, it was not an “invasion”, but rather an:
“Uncontested Arrival”.
That euphemism can go in the pile with:
“Overseas Contingency Operations”,
“Kinetic Military Actions”,
“Police Action”,
and “Workplace Violence”.
Clueless A$$holes, they are…
You know what would really help you people in hurricane country? A few multibillion dollar high-speed rail programs. Works a charm in Clownifornia.
I had to sleep with the windows closed because of the wind. Temps in the condo were in the 60s last night. I thought I was going to die!
Only Verizon will actually get reception in most of NM. No other choice for us, really.
Send rain to NM, 3rd driest winter on record.
15 year old with ‘disabilities’ kills a 12 year old. Mom says, he’s so good with the 4 month old we leave with him. Jesus.
“Uncontested Arrival”
That’s the strangest euphemism for sexual climax I’ve ever heard.
You had to sleep with the windows closed to keep the poisonous snakes and bugs outside.
I think it’s been established that everyone everywhere complains about the weather when it isn’t exactly to their liking.
Hey Oso,
It’s cold as hell outside. No spiders, snakes, scorpions or monsters.
I think it’s been established that everyone everywhere complains about the weather when it isn’t exactly to their liking.
This explains the perpetually sour disposition of climate change hysterics.
Thanks, Pepe. Cute puppeh. We have spiders and centipedes. So far no snakes or scorpions. Not counting out El Cucuey.
Wind was brutal here yesterday.
The cold is killing off Stink Bugs. Hopefully ticks too.
Pepe, yes it was. I’m still trying to get the 15 yr old killer story translated for non-NM.
That story sounds horrendous but not unexpecteded, coming from the genetic mutations of the FSA
What about the guy that raped the 4 month old to death “because she was crying” WTF?
Mom’s boyfriend. I get really tired of living in a state that got rid of the DP.
Some people need to die.
Yes. Still waiting for the trial of the foster kid that killed my cousin. One plead. Another cousin was killed and his body burnt on the mesa. Trial was meh. You may remember the Torreon Cabin case. I’ve worked with people on both sides of that one. Still no justice.
Redneck genius
Torreon – Asshole druggies that left the kids to starve to death. They need to die.
Watching “Game of Thrones.” In the HBO series, they keep putting in gay stuff that wasn’t in the books. No reason for it.
Homophobe!!!!
Torreon, you just can’t win a jury trial in NM. They guy that plead has been trying to get a jury trial ever since. Stupid gangbanger.
Not a phobia, I’m not in fear at all. It’s just really weird.
Did anybody use up all the hot water before anybody else got to take a shower today?
Yes. Dan did.
The earthworms are really drowning over here. They are crawling up the outside walls to escape the water.
So I turned the machine guns on them.
So, local stores stopped carrying Sweet Jalapeño Relish. I was like “OK, I’ll just buy Sweet Jalapeños. No blood, no foul.” WHY DID THEY STOP CARRYING SWEET JALAPENOS? Why, Santy Claus, why? (Cindy Lou Who)
Cover songs as a category on Jeopardy. Wiser just exploded.
Cover songs as a category on Jeopardy. Wiser just exploded.
“Alex, the answer is who is Guess Who.”
If I was in the hills, yeah, it might be an issue. But we’re not likely to get mudslides here.
The makers of Depends beg to differ.
I’ll take the Everly Brothers for $200.
WHY DID THEY STOP CARRYING SWEET JALAPENOS? Why, Santy Claus, why?
Here, oso – not sweet jalopy relish, but …
http://ilovepeanutbutter.com/index.php/peanut-butter-1/theheatison.html
I’m not sure what to think of that.
Seasons in the Sun was the Billboard #1 in 1974. Nirvana cover?
I tried to like the Everly Brothers. And the Statler Brothers. And the Smothers Brothers. And the Righteous Brothers.
They all suck.
“The answer is, ‘Connecticut radio station with an unknown baritone renown for local deli updates and computer advice.'”
Seasons in the Sun was the Billboard #1 in 1974. Nirvana cover?
HAHAHAHAHA! Makes me wanna hear a Pantera cover of “Chevy Van”
Nickelback covering “The Night Chicago Died” would suck ass x 100000
But you liked the Louvin Brothers
Lady Gaga covering “Funeral for a Friend” hahahahahHAHAHAHA
I DO like the Louvin Brothers!
And Homer & Jethro, who never really pretended to be brothers, anyway
Not a fan of peanut butter in asian food. Dog is good. Chicken feet are gross.
Nickleback just kinda sux anyway.
Only at the H2 do people know the Louvin Brothers. Rednecks.
Katy Perry covers Sabbath’s “War Pigs”
OK Jazz
I’m running out of current pop stars whose names I know. I’ve got a lot of incongruous music with which to match them, but I don’t know many more names.
Justin Bieber covering Floyd’s “One of these days” – I can just hear her belting out “One of these days I’m going to cut you into little pieces” hahahahah
Rihanna covering “What’s Love Got To Do With It?”
I heard sonewhere that the number 1 song in 1969 wasn’t Jimi Hendrix or the Beatles or the Stones or the Who or Janis Joplin but ” Yummy Yummy Yummy I’ve Got Love in My Tummy” by the faux group, The Archies.
Cover THAT piece of shit
That was AWESOME, TJ! I love those guys.
Here’s one, TJ & oso – not the Louvin Bros
I liked Joe Cocker back in the day
He did great covers
Saw him during his Mad Dogs And Englishmen Tour when I was a kid
Leon Russell was amazing
Nice, Jazz. I think Joe Cocker is the king of covers after George Strait.
Rihanna really should cover Benetar’s “Hit me with your best shot.”
”Yummy Yummy Yummy I’ve Got Love in My Tummy” was Ohio Express. The Archies did “Sugar Sugar.”
Watch Pat Benetar/Martina McBride on Crossroads. Best TV show EVER!!!
Jazz
Thanks!
Here’s one of my favorites
It even gets a little ghey..
Hard to out-redneck me!
😉
*backs away from Sean*
Love Faron Young. I really really really love Bob Wills. George Strait caught me with his Bob covers.
Love Rollacoastah,, bitch!
The RHCP cover of this sucked dix
Enjoy da funk!
I wrote an essay about the Ohio Players and sexism in college. Got an A+. Other classes had to read my essay. Dan knew of me 6 years before he met me.
It’s cold as hell outside. No spiders, snakes, scorpions or monsters.
Inflatable monkey.
The Ohio Players were like a rape van with horns
You old farts still awake?
Uh oh. Mrs. Orwell has set the tv to QVC.
OK
I meant Sugar Sugar not that other piece of crap
The Ohio Players were like a rape van with horns
Was that a Ford or Chevy product?
When you’re as old as me, being awake is a relative term
Hey, bcoch!!! How’s the 2nd happiest place on earth?
I get to go to the Fiery Foods Show tomorrow. I’m thinking about trying Ghost Chile Salsa. Pray for me.
The Ohio Players were like a rape van with horns
You want to disable the horn on your rape van.
The dead never sleep, bcoch.
My pants are fine oso, thanks for asking.
As for Disney, we got here and checked in and in our rooms about 9. So we’re up and at em bright and early tomorrow. Cram as much Magic Kingdom in as we can stand during the day. Once dinner is done and the kids are down, my parents are going to watch them and the wife, the sis and I are going to head back into the park for the nighttime stuff. Then Epcot on Sunday because that’s where the Frozen princesses are and the girls will LOSE…THEIR…SHIT…if we don’t get to see them.
”Yummy Yummy Yummy I’ve Got Love in My Tummy” was Ohio Express. The Archies did “Sugar Sugar.”
Neither has anything on the 1910 Fruitgum Co. (“1-2-3 Red Light”).
I dont know if he mentioned it, but If you listen to Wisers show tomorrow, I’ll be on that second half
TJ: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLoQS0GnhWk
Norway!!!! You can still drink around the world on Sunday. Fast Pass the character meat, Soarin’, and Test Track.
Wiser has a show?
I’m thinking about trying Ghost Chile Salsa.
Don’t rub your eyes afterwards. Or touch any mucous membranes. Or your pets.
I’m gonna hafta catch podcast, TJ. I’m at a karate tournament at the first part of the day
>>>I get to go to the Fiery Foods Show tomorrow. I’m thinking about trying Ghost Chile Salsa. Pray for me.
Hey, if you die, can I get half your stuff?
Yes
It costars Mare and Rosetta
I’m going to talk about my Duck Stamp collection
For an hour.
haha. I think beasn has dibs on my stuff.
Cram as much Magic Kingdom in as we can stand
I saw that once on the adult channel.
I’m thinking about trying Ghost Chile Salsa.
You can’t say “ghost” anything without this awful “song” coming to mind:
TexasJew FTW tomorrow.
>>>I’m going to talk about my Duck Stamp collection
For an hour.
I misread that the first time.
Did any of you rat bastard pricks know that Garth Brooks won’t sell any of his shit on itunes? Well, now you know.
Live from my bunk!
Another for TJ:
Who’s Garth Brooks?
Coke Zero at the store across from Dumbo’s Flight. I’m really sad that I didn’t buy a tiara last time I was there. My Princess Mickey Ears with Tiara is just OK.
Garth is an Okie that wanted to be a rock star. Chris Gaines. Whatev.
Did any of you rat bastard pricks know that Garth Brooks won’t sell any of his shit on itunes? Well, now you know.
I applaud him. Fuck Apple with the Satan’s festering barbed cock
Let’s hope Wiser addresses TexasJew as “bro.” As in “mitzvah.”
I keep playing “Pitfall” over and over. I fecking love the Louvin brothers.
AHAHAHAH – If TJ tells wiser that wiser needs to be “bro mitvahed,” I’ll stripe myself
I saw Fuck Apple open for Satans Festering Barbed Cock last summer at Chesapeake Arena.
PG, he has an exclusive deal with WalMart. Most of his songs aren’t available on iTunes either.
I want a “my frugal friend…” from Wiser.
Great song Jazz
Kitty Wells was great
Did any of you rat bastard pricks know that Garth Brooks won’t sell any of his shit on itunes?
I like good music and don’t use iTunes, so that’s news to me.
Garth was at Oklahoma State almost the same time as Cyn
Coincidence?
I saw him play in Stillwater
He was a rocker back then
Total chameleon
I’ve never seen Cyn and Garth Brooks in the same room at the same time.
G’nite, folks. Always fun to play. Put on a good show tomorrow, TJ – I can’t wait to hear what you’ve got to say. 🙂
Jazz
Here’s my all-time favorite Texas guy,
Hank Thompson and the Brazos Valley Boys
Absolutely great..
Nite Jazz
I love you guys. If you’d only comment faster….goes back to chatting with WP on FB.
I am back in the dog rescue business. On Tuesday I applied to foster for the Houston Golden Rescue. I was approved and picked up a very chill dog today. Pics tomorrow!
I like how this place turns into Shitkicker Central at night now. Here’s my contribution:
My girlfriend and I saved a couple of bulldogs during a hellish summer in Houston
Between the heartworm and the heat, it’s a dangerous place during the summer for dogs
H2 – kicking the shit that Americans won’t!
I drove over to the 3rd ward off of MLK Blvd it was 30 miles on 10 and 45. The dog speaks Spanish and has never been inside.
I will not crate him because he is a chill calm dog but I am closing my bedroom to keep him on the tile and hardwood.
Yes TJ
I am certain he is heartworm positive. He is 4 and has never been to the vet. He is fed table scraps and free to roam the neighborhood. Animal control piked him up. The family did not want to repair the fence so they agreed to let animal control pick him up.
The neighbor called us because the pound puts them down after 3 days. She thought he deserved better. I promised her he will get it.
They were picking him up March 1 so it was a close thing. Very close.
But all is well.
ok I will quit now
That’s good Vmax
Goodnight
I meant its good that you’re helping that dog
I was just getting ready to pass out
Thanks.
Vmax, I think it’s stellar that you foster Goldens. You’re a good man.
Am I the only one who noticed that the dog can talk? Sure, it’s only Spanish, but Telemundo’s money is plenty green.
we have Estrella too. Thanks, Vmax.
Riley doesn’t talk?
He only says swears. Usually when you try to wake him up.
Only derp can bring the rain
That makes you yearn to the sky
Only derp can bring the rain
That falls like tears from on high
I’m enjoying TJ’s Hank Thompson vid. I need to wade thru a bunch more stuff before I start tossing out more links.