Welcome to BBF, a regular feature at the H2!
First of all, the state song of West Virginia (ok, it has West Virginia in the lyrics):
I thought we might go back to our roots, and appreciate one of the finer things in life, BEAUTY PAGEANTS!
Whitney Veach, Miss West Virginia 2011!
A medical sales representative, Whitney hopes to become active in television.
“Her hobbies include; working out, hiking, baking, boating, sports, traveling, and biking. Whitney describes herself as independent, optimistic and driven,” according to her official biography.
We always have to have a quiz, so listen up!
41 – Roman Emperor Caligula, known for his eccentricity and cruel despotism, is assassinated by his disgruntled Praetorian Guards. The Guard then proclaims Caligula’s uncle Claudius as Emperor
1848 – California Gold Rush: James W. Marshall finds gold at Sutter’s Mill near Sacramento.
1857 – The University of Calcutta is formally founded as the first fully-fledged university in south Asia.
1933 – The 20th Amendment to the United States Constitution is ratified, changing the beginning and end of terms for all elected federal offices.
1943 – World War II: Franklin D. Roosevelt and Winston Churchill conclude a conference in Casablanca.
1946 – The United Nations General Assembly passes its first resolution to establish the United Nations Atomic Energy Commission.
1972 – Japanese Sgt. Shoichi Yokoi is found hiding in a Guam jungle, where he had been since the end of World War II.
1978 – Soviet satellite Cosmos 954, with a nuclear reactor on board, burns up in Earth‘s atmosphere, scattering radioactive debris over Canada’s Northwest Territories. Only 1% is recovered.
1984 – The first Apple Macintosh goes on sale.
1986 – Voyager 2 passes within 81,500 kilometres (50,600 mi) of Uranus.
2003 – The United States Department of Homeland Security officially begins operation.
Ok, that was more of a lecture, so here’s some bonus Birthdays!
Births
1692– vmaximus
1939 – Ray Stevens, American singer-songwriter
1941 – Neil Diamond, American singer-songwriter and guitarist
1947 – Michio Kaku, Japanese-American physicist
1947 – Warren Zevon, American singer-songwriter (Hindu Love Gods and lyme and cybelle) (d. 2003)
1949 – John Belushi, American actor (d. 1982)
1950 – Gennifer Flowers, American actress and model
1951 – Yakov Smirnoff, Ukrainian-American comedian
1961 – Nastassja Kinski, German-American actress
1968 – Mary Lou Retton, American gymnast
Have a lovely Friday!
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And with that, I’ll see y’all in a bit. Save up the really good h8 for when I get back, mkay?
Far out! Lurve me some John Denver!
She looks like she could make a nice sammich. Easy on the mustard!
I’d hit it.
My sister would die if she could see the male nurse caring for her. He’s HHD material, fershur.
Pics or it didn’t happen.
She’s pretty, but she must need a counterweight on her ass to keep from falling over.
This is really good. The Franklin Roosevelt link was by far the best.
Thanks Jay! No matter what Cyn says about you in her email blasts, you’re ok with me.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VMAX!! http://is.gd/j3H3aD
Ha ha. You’re next, punk.
>> I’d hit it.
Like it owed me money.
Happy birthday, Vmax!
>> I’d hit it.
Like the refresh button on Mila Kunis webpage.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1sowq_HBF3E&feature=youtu.be
My favorite is the Apple Macintosh one.
I put that in there for MJ and Hotspur.
wakey wakey
And the Calcutta gif makes me want to see a Bollywood action flick.
I like your is.gd link to vmax, cyn. Far out, dude!
Dang it. Thanks Jay.
Fixtd.
I’d hit it like it was running off into the woods after I lifted the bucket.
I’d hit it like Mike Tyson after Robin Givens told him she wanted to see other men.
i.e. surprised and slightly terrified that this is actually happening.
I still LOL thinking about that, leon.
I might have peed a little, too.
I’m bummed, I’m not getting a traffic spike.
My vote is split between the gold rush and the Guam jungle links.
True story (drink!): I’ve seen the data for Cosmos 954. Years ago, we did a risk assessment if a Challenger-type accident happened with either Galileo or Ulysses on board, to see if the plutonium would be contained. Looked at a bunch of different satellite breakups, put it all into a Monte Carlo simulation. Glad I don’t do much programming any more.
I might have peed a little, too.
You should hear me tell the story drunk.
Also they have special,discreet undergarments for that now.
Wait for it, J’ames. Morons haven’t gotten to work yet.
My friend in VA tells me that I will be hearing from HR today about the new job, so sometime soon I will be in the pocket of Big Data.
Hey, quick question:
What are some responses to, ‘So it packs a punch?’
What are some responses to, ‘So it packs a punch?’
No, it’s really more like a knee to the groin.
What are some responses to, ‘So it packs a punch?’
http://www.funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/96729/Falcon/
Alternatively:
“I wouldn’t say it packs one, exactly, it’s more like it’s got a goon named Vinnie that follows it around and does the punching whenever it raises an eyebrow.”
http://twitpic.com/dmy6vl
“So it packs a punch?”
“Like Koolaid Man smashing through a wall at your kids birthday party, causing the roof to collapse and kill everyone they ever loved”
OH YEAH!
I’d hit it like Tiger Woods on a Stuckey’s waitress.
“Like Koolaid Man smashing through a wall at your kids birthday party, causing the roof to collapse and kill everyone they ever loved”
————————
Hahahahahaha. I’m totally stealing that. I might tone it down a little, but that’s hilarious.
It’ll be in the radio show tomorrow when I explain the strength of the drink.
“So it packs a punch?”
“Have you ever been curious about Muppet porn?”
oh, this is for the show? Cool! I think we should still make this a joke thread though.
Like Buzz Aldrin being asked about the Moon landing hoax.
Like Ike Turner after an all night bender.
“So it packs a punch?”
“Give your guests helmets and cover the floor with pillows.”
I can’t wait for drink of the week. I’m wondering what stealth H2 topic(s) will be featured.
Like the Taiwanese Parliament after a bill is introduced to ban riding quadruple on a moped.
And I’ll need a recording, wiser. I have a basketball game to attend. But you’ll be part of my exercise routine later in the day!
You should just go ahead and put your pajamas on before you drink this.
Oh FFS. Why doesn’t lauraw just do this for me.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Like Rob Ford at McDonalds after a late night binge.
Laura needs to do bacon of the week.
“So it packs a punch?”
*Eye of the Tiger starts playing*
Step 1: Put on pajamas
Step 2: Make drink
Step 3: Put on helmet
Step 4: Check status of your will
Step 5: Call relatives and friends
Step 6: Consume beverage
Morning, children.
“So it packs a punch?”
Like an Alec Baldwin voicemail.
It packs a punch. I was testing the recipe and lost 2 days, and woke up in bed with muppets.
I gave this poat a thumbs up and a like even though she seems too wholesome and non-skanky for BBF. And for WV in general.
So it packs a punch?
You’ll need to call a porter for everything it packs.
This drink is so strong it throws out the first pitch at a baseball game better than the current occupant of the white house.
Biff didn’t get up after George McFly gave him one at the Fish Under the Sea dance.
For Dave
That’s some very naughty butter substitute.
*glares at Kerrygold*
Why can’t you be dirty with me like that?
>>>This drink is so strong it throws out the first pitch at a baseball game better than the current occupant of the white house.
Eh, that’s not a real high bar to meet.
“So it packs a punch?”
“You know, there is an unfair social stigma out there about the use of adult diapers…”
I don’t want to overstate things, but this drink may have been the last punch Hemingway ever took.
Too soon?
“So it packs a punch?”
It is considered humane to offer your liver a blindfold first.
The guy writing it didn’t like the suggestion that the enemies of the Israelites were fought with cocktails, so he described the story of David and the hefty Philistine a little differently than it really went down.
“So it packs a punch?”
——————————–
It was the second shooter.
“So it packs a punch?”
It is considered an act of cruel barbarism to show the drink to your liver before consuming it.
But who cares? It will be dead soon anyway.
Now, now, now – you must throw in a “Naugatuck” reference in your answer…..
Gotta know your audience 😛
“So it packs a punch?”
———————————
It’s a vietnamese drink, and to this day, John McCain still can’t even look at it without freaking out.
Pics or it didn’t happen.
Fer realz, romy. I’m resentful of this fecking Adonis in scrubs. If he weren’t such a great nurse, I’d punch him.
As for Ms BBF, if she were a fish, she’d be a lungfish. Holy crap – on the flag scale, she’d get a “full mast.” That might be a euphemism for “selfie,” too.
“So it packs a punch?”
———————————
It’s been theorized that it led to the extinction of the dinosaurs.
Last living opponent of this drink in a fight was Jack Lalanne.
Oh, wait.
These were invented just prior to what we now know as The Dark Ages. That’s not a coincidence.
There’s the traffic spike! Evidently it’s Mountain Time that’s the key.
Hospital update:
Emily opened her eyes this morning, moved her toes when she was told, and shook her head when the nurse axed her if she was in pain. Doctors are concerned about some brain damage – she was oxygen-deprived during her cardiac arrest the other night, and her CT scan revealed some concerns in that regard. We’re still trying to get her to an MRI, but her heart sustained some damage during the arrest, and she’s been a little too unstable for that procedure. Progress is slow and there are concerns, but, overall, things are trending well, and I’m not gonna worry about stuff I can’t change.
Thanks to all for your continued prayers and/or support. I’m convinced it’s why she’s still here, and you’re a big reason I’m able to be strong for my fam. Humor is cathartic, & depraved humor is convalescent. Y’all bring it in spades. Grassy ass de bottomo de mi corazon.
The Tunguska Event? An eskimo dropped his cup.
I sure the feck am ready to be spelled right about now. I want to go to bed.
So, I appear to have come full circle. My state of the art home sound system, circa 2000, is quickly becoming extinct.
First to die was the CD player, which is now redundant because DVD players came along. Then my DVD player died last summer, so I got a Bluray version, thinking “I don’t have any Bluray disks, but may as well get with the program.”
Then my tv died, so I got a 46″ HD version with built in wifi, and 3D capability.
Then I bought The Hobbit in 3D, only to discover that my Bluray player is not 3D compatible. So back to the store for a new Bluray 3D player.
Now my amplifier is no longer compatible because it lacks HDMI ports which are needed for 3D speed. I can watch movies using the tv sound, but I have this awesome (still) speaker system.
So, now I need a new amplifier. And $20.
Any recommendations?
We actually dropped one of these on Nagasaki. Pilot took a whiff and threw it out the window. Saved us a bomb.
and I’m not gonna worry about stuff I can’t change.
Like the fact that you’re her brother?
(Hey, you asked for depraved.)
Seriously though, I hope she continues to improve and hope for a full recovery. I also hope she can get good help getting her back to happiness.
Try plugging it in.
Like Lawrence Taylor on Thiesmann’s leg.
Heh
Thanks for the birthday wishes. For a present I get 1/2 a day off because Houston is frozen. A snow half day because there is no snow.
I do not share the same musical preferences as Gabriel Malor. I try to enjoy new material, but my tastes just don’t coincide.
The Tunguska Event? An eskimo dropped his cup.
OK, that’s funny.
Mine generally don’t either, Jazz.
Happy birthday, Zekexas! I’d give you a birthday wedgie – if you wore underwear.
Thanks, Hotspur. This looks whole event is starting to look like a product of over-medication by her psychiatrist. He had her on a cocktail that makes speedballs (heroin + coke) look tame.
Particularly since Tunguska was in Siberia, where there are no Eskimos.
Leon, you are the picture of tact. 😀
Well, no Eskimos anymore.
Happy Birthday, VMAX!!!!!!
This looks whole event is starting to look like a product of over-medication by her psychiatrist.
Same thing happened to my friend’s mom on my 27th birthday. She didn’t make it 😦 Glad Emily’s still improving.
Happy Birthday Vmax, I got you 8 of these:
*break*
*break*
*break*
*break*
“So it packs a punch?”
Like an AoS SoCon thread.
Does anybody share the same musical taste as Gabe?
Boris Yeltsin and Ted Kennedy tried to drink more than one.
You know how that ended? They’re both sober, now.
Jazz, they did that to my daughter two years ago. She never got suicidal, but she basically became a paranoid vegetable. It took months to wean her off all that shit, and get her back to real life. And I don’t think it would have happened without HotBride’s intervention.
She researched all of the meds, cross referenced their side effects, and did a compatibility matrix. It was a seriously fucked up combination. The doctors and pharmacists didn’t do any of that. Their responses were always to add new drugs.
Don’t let them do that.
The Tunguska event can be traced back to the sudden growth in the Siberian reindeer population. Ancient alien theorists believe that the event was the consequence of a massive in-flight collision between battling reindeer and a meteor.
Happy birthday, Vmax. So glad you got yourself moved to Texas and started a new life.
If I were there, I’d buy you a drink.
OK, I have homework to do and then also my day job.
Ciao
The fecking psych dr. had prescribed my sister a stimulant that they give to narcoleptics – at more than 3x the dose they give the most hardcore narcos, and then, because she couldn’t sleep, he loaded her up with tons of sedatives to “even her out.” I’m inclined to go even him out. I won’t, but I won’t deny I’ve got the inclination.
Obamahomework.
Sounds like time for an official complaint to the medical board Jazz.
Wow! Vmax has a new ID!
Mind. Blown.
Now I feel GREAT about the birthday. Not that I didn’t before, but it’s so much more fun when it’s someone you know!
Thank you Pups that was nice
Thanks lauraw. Have an awesome day and I’ll somehow slip in a reference to your hilariousness.
There’s time enough for that, Bcoch. Gotta get thru some stuff, first. But you can bet there will be some accountability. Guaranteed.
Was she on modafinil (ProVigil)? That’s basically sleep in pill form, minus the REM part. It’s fine for a little while, by itself, when you’re otherwise healthy, but it’s powerful stuff.
A lot of biohackers and student talk their way into prescriptions for it, then horde the pills for when they need to stay up for a week.
Not that drug, leon. I’ve had a time remembering everything. I’ve absorbed a lot of info over the past few days, and the number of drugs they’ve been giving her – on top of the ones she took – is just staggering. Poison control has been directing the detox efforts, and I just can’t recall the drugs she was on. I did not hear the name(s) you mentioned, tho.
I was down in the hospital cafeteria, and I thought of a new name for a restaurant: Chicken-osis.
Whatcha think?
Not bad Jazz
LOL – good one, Jazz!
Oh, and Happy Birthday, VMax! ♥♥♥
Jazz, I hope that the only things affected in your sister’s brain by all of this are the parts that made her feel hopeless in the first place. (Does that make sense?)
She’s young, and she’s a fighter – those are both points in her favor. And she’s got all of us running interference with the Big Guy upstairs – that’s got to count for something, amiright?
Absolutely right, T. Absolutely.
Happy Birthday, VMax.
Happy Birthday, Vman!
Wasn’t Amanda Adkins from the Weather Channel reality series “Prospectors” a former Miss West Virginia?
BTW, on the AoSHQ Moron Facebook page, I moved that Fridays are Katerday, and on my Twitter @kbdabear page I’m posting Kate Upton pics every Friday until I reach 1000 followers
Happy Birthday, Vmax. I got you this for your birthday.
Here’s another good “Coexist” sign”:
http://is.gd/K2gEos
Happy birthday Vman!!
MJ, has a conference call at 2 today.
Hahahahahaha
Scott and Laura, you have some splainin’ to do.
http://www.westernjournalism.com/millionaire-congresswoman-income-inequality-existential-threat/
and on my Twitter @kbdabear page I’m posting Kate Upton pics every Friday until I reach 1000 followers
Shameless.
So, now I need a new amplifier. And $20.
Any recommendations?
Read a book.
Happy birfday, Vmax. You are now one year closer to finding adult diapers an acceptable topic of conversation.
MJ, has a conference call at 2 today.
———————
That was basically 100% true and what I do all day, everyday.
Scary.
Happy Birthday, Vmax. I got you this for your birthday.
I hope that isn’t like the pie served at the end of Titus Andronicus.
Hey, I did say “read a book.”
page I’m posting Kate Upton pics every Friday until I reach 1000 followers
I’d suggest a few pics of Captain Kirk too but that’s probably counter-productive.
I haven’t said it yet, so Happy Birthday, Vmax.
Congrats on not dying for another year, vman.
I can’t believe we missed National Pie Day yesterday.
This will remedy low blood pressure.
How I detest Clownifornia.
Every time I have checked the thermometer outside my kitchen window in the last two days, it has said 6 degrees.
* Extends index finger: tap, tap, tap, tap.
I think it must be broken. Frozen is more like it.
Where’s lippy? A link for lippy.
Cyn and Oso can look took. And xbrad. And Mare if she’s still around.
Is anyone else enjoying BBF by smoking a cigar and slurping coffee in the backyard?
By “cigar” I mean cigar and by “coffee” I mean coffee, so get your minds out of the gutter.
That’s adorable, Car in, thanks.
I see while NRO and Steyn have parted legal ways, Steyn is for now acting as his own lawyer. This sounds perilous.
I look forward to the After School Tuck In And Bedtime Story Program.
CAMDEN (CBS)– New Jersey Governor Chris Christie along with Camden Mayor Dana Redd and Superintendent of Schools Paymon Rouhanifard announced a new program that will help Camden students and their families.
The After School Dinner Program, in partnership with ARAMARK, is now being offered to students in six participating schools in the Camden district…
Chris Christie is such a staunch Republican. We’re lucky to have him.
I look forward to the After School Tuck In And Bedtime Story Program.
You just need to find the right teacher.
Aldous Huxley was wrong. It turns out to create a society of citizens who know their place you do not need a breeding program powered by bioengineering techniques. All you need is a compliant blue State Republican.
I found an answer to Hotspur’s home theater dilemma. It might cost more than $20.
Aldous Huxley was wrong. It turns out to create a society of citizens who know their place you do not need a breeding program powered by bioengineering techniques. All you need is a compliant blue State Republican.
——————————–
Think of what would be possible with the combination of the two.
I’m all for it. Let’s burn this fucker down.
The NSA has nothing on the Phone Company:
I’m all for it. Let’s burn this fucker down.
I don’t quite believe in “let it burn.” The reason for this is that we are not in a situation where we have a choice. It’s not “let it burn,” but rather “it’s going to burn anyway.”
I believe we are well past the tipping point already.
Christie was so good when he first went national. It sucks that he’s such a tool in actuality.
I’m all for it. Let’s burn this fucker down.
I think it’s important to protect whatever passes for libraries and art while the barbarians are busy looting.
The NSA has nothing on the Phone Company:
http://youtu.be/Pw1QDE-WA4A
Reminds me of the climax of the movie The President’s Analyst.
I’m sure that the families of the students in those 6 Camden schools will be having their Food Stamp benefits reduced right away, seeing as their children will be getting the lion’s share of their meals paid for by the school district now..
Right?
I believe we are well past the tipping point already.
———————-
Allow me to clarify: Let it burn faster, and hotter.
Seriously, Christie went to all that trouble with teachers’ unions just to bloat the administrators and vendors to school districts.
Mrs. Orwell teaches and she was furious when they started making teachers personally serve breakfast in the fucking classroom. She as to deal with cleaning up spilled syrup instead of teach. Yet somehow Clownifornia has the cash to buy thousands of old model iPads for Teh Children that still are not used or working properly.
Allow me to clarify: Let it burn faster, and hotter.
I like a nice bonfire.
I found an answer to Hotspur’s home theater dilemma. It might cost more than $20.
Hell, you couldn’t get that thing hauled away for less than $200.
But it looks like I’m in the $1,200 price range for what I need.
Okay, the Jennifer Flowers link had me cracking up!
She as to deal with cleaning up spilled syrup instead of teach
WTF do they get syrup? Syrup is for closers. You want sugar on top of your starchy sugar? CLOSE.
My offer letter apparently went out in snail mail yesterday.
I’ve been offered dinner. . . if I do the laundry.
Don’t fall for it. Before you know it you’re doing laundry for nothing.
Hold out for a handjob.
>>>Hold out for a handjob.
What is he, 16? Trying to get a handy in the backseat of his mom’s station wagon?
I’ve been offered dinner. . . if I do the laundry.
Who’s gonna wash it after your done?
So my charming, lovely, and thoughtful wife got me a short membership in the “Bacon of the Month” club for Christmas. (She received notice that the next month’s sample has shipped yesterday!)
Question: what would be a suitable Valetine’s Day gift for such a woman? Diamond jewelry is out, because, as I said, it is only a short membership, and not a lifetime membership.
They didn’t have station wagons yet when he was 16.
Question: what would be a suitable Valetine’s Day gift for such a woman?
There’s only one Vellumtime’s gift for a woman like that:
VAJAZZLE!!!
If you don’t want to give flowers to your sweetie on Valentine’s Day, you can give her long-stemmed kittens instead:
https://www.thinkgeek.com/product/1539/
Not gonna happen, Teresa. Our dogs are in constant training for setting a new world’s record on plush toy destruction time. The obligatory Christmas plush toy lasted 32.75 seconds – they only have to shave 3.6 seconds off their time.
OMG I get to go to the feed mill now!! Wooooo!
Mostly, after that I get to go home. So, you know, excitement.
Oh gosh, AD – I hadn’t even read your comment when I posted that; it was just a “blind” comment/link.
Too funny!
It would be bad enough to have to fix a water main break in this weather, but how about a sewer main break?
VAJAZZLE by Jazz?
Get her a vacuum cleaner.
That IS uncomfortably close to my moniker. I swear, though, I’ve had nothing to do with the vajazzling. Not intentionally. I would love to bedazzle some doll with my vajazzling talents. Just haven’t had the opportunity.
Get her a vacuum cleaner.
I thought about an iRobot, but then realized what our dogs would do to it the first time it bumped into one of them while he/she was sleeping.
Just haven’t had the opportunity.
You can practice on yourself
This:
http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/01/23/if-i-cant-accept-you-at-your-worst-then-maybe-you-should-stop-being-so-horrible/
We have 11F here, with 30 mph winds. I lost feeling in my fingertips bringing in the garbage bin. In my double-layered snowmobile gloves.
Balmy 10º here.
Are you having the awful wind?
Are you having the awful wind?
Beano would help with that.
Yeah, I keep seeing the snow swirling outside my window. Thankful I’m inside.
#1 son called while driving back from Grand rapids and said the wind was blowing snow across the roads. . .
I’m waiting for the dead trees to crack and fall. Already frozen solid.
Andrea’s in the Leg Chair today. TGIF.
Considering the size of the gigantic guts and asses on the EBT customers I always see at WalMart, I’d say that the government’s food stamp program is working very well
Cracktree
http://seriouslyforreal.com/funny/classy-people-of-walmart-2014-newest-entries-16-pics/
Uh, thongs on guys?
*reaches for ipecac*
Not clicking that shit without a bribe.
Moves jimbro to the top on the “Kill First” list…..
Not clicking that shit without a bribe.
Displaying your intelligence once again. I, otoh, now have to go find brain bleach.
Can’t help you there, AD. Avoidance is the only method I’ve found.
Later, door knob lickers and window butt rubbers (sp?). Time to brave the frozen tundra and take the wife out to dinner. Then to bed, since we have a dog show this weekend.
Greetings, off the clockers.
shhhh…today we’ve secretly replaced Sean’s usual Diet Dr. Pepper with a large, angry wasp. Let’s see if he notices.
Jimbro, it is OPMD and it strikes older people. UNM is undertaking the study because it seems to be prevalent in Northeastern NM. it is genetic and unlike other MDs it targets people after 45. My Uncle was always an athletic guy and he was in his late 50s when he was diagnosed. Doctors credit his racquetball addiction with helping delay onset. My cousin, Tony, started showing symptoms in his late 30s. He has taken up Triathlons since then.
Hmmmm…Diet Dr Pepper usually tastes more like regular Dr Pepper, but this tastes more like being repeatedly stung in the mouth. It’s also buzzing slightly more loudly than usual.
Curses. Sean foiled the Diet Dr Pepper Taste Test Institute once again.
HA HA HA HA SURPRISE! IT’S A VENOMOUS WASP! LOOK! HA HA! IT’S SO ANGRY! WAVE AT THE HIDDEN CAMERA AND APPEAR PLEASANTLY HUMILIATED SO PEOPLE DON’T THINK YOU’RE A BAD SPORT! YAY!
Listen, I can’t help but notice that you’re kind of, you know. Swelling up and not breathing.
Does this mean you won’t be making the switch?
I’ve never heard of that one Oso. Not even the name. For boards we learn an incredible amount of things we’ll never see or maybe only see once in years of practice. I’ve never read about OPMD that I can recall. I’ll read a bit about it right now.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK1126/
Hemph! Youmb sphure goft mbe!
*goes into shock*
Hemph! Youmb sphure goft mbe!
So we know Sean doesn’t use autocorrect.
I’ve had it to here
Bein’ where love’s a small word
Part-time thing, paper ring. . .
Autocorrect is for cowards.
Afternoon.
Autocorrect is for the little ripple.
Jimbro, it was too techie for me. I know that 3 of my Uncle’s siblings didn’t get the gene and 4 did. All 3 of my cousins have it and to my knowledge one of the grandkids.
Autocorrect is for cowards.
Today I built twelve (12) of these:
http://tinyurl.com/mk553ot
Today’s big drop in the DJIA might be the start of what I was trying to dodge with my 401k. It’s the right time of year for a big correction, but it might bounce back on Monday.
Autocorrect is for the little ripple.
MJ’s liquor cabinet.
http://bit.ly/1jtGCGQ
Not gonna pretend like I was some kind of classy drunk (hello, store-brand vodka!) but the only one of those I ever had was Boone’s Farm.
What the hell is that, Jewstin?
What the hell is that, Jewstin?
I think it’s a wasp container for the Dr. Pepper hidden camera crew.
MD 20/20 was at a few bonfires in high school.
Otherwise: None of the above.
That is sneaky as heck.
I think Night Train is actually a Gallo product.
I’m a semi-classy drinker. Middle shelf or top. At Meijer, anyhow.
Except for triplesec. There’re only 2 grades of triplesec and the bottom shelf is decent.
What the hell is that, Jewstin?
That is an M59-A Modified Army Field Range. Fully accessorized.
That is an M59-A Modified Army Field Range. Fully accessorized.
Needs a .50 cal, I think.
Ummm…er…umm…I’ve always had black friends. Even in the suburbs, you drink what you know. You should see the stuff we imbibed on Taiwan. Plum wine. Rice wine. Peijou.
Via Daily Caller:
A dating service that pairs wealthy “sugar daddies” with “sugar babies” for “mutually beneficial dating arrangements” has endorsed Texas Democratic gubernatorial candidate Wendy Davis.
—
“Wendy Davis is proof that the sugar lifestyle is empowering,” seeking arrangements founder and CEO Brandon Wade said in his endorsement. “It can take a single mom from squalor to scholar, or in this case from the trailer park to Harvard, and a seat in the Senate. The sugar lifestyle creates an opportunity for women to transcend the single mother stereotypes.”
In a sane world, that’s a kiss of death.
We’ll see what it is in this one.
It’s Chinatown, Leon.
No, it’s Texas, and that’s the only reason I don’t know whether that’s a good endorsement, or whether Greg Abbot is the tricksiest bastard ever in getting those guys to endorse Wendy.
I’m really craving a queso smothered green chile cheeseburger thanks to you cheesehounds.
I had a cheese omelet for dinner. Almost done eating my company Christmas gift.
One thing about having Agency kids as friends, is that when their fathers and sometimes mothers pass, you can’t really express how they served OUR country. Just know that a hero passed away today of old age in his bed at home.
Yes we had enough snow to make a FOOTPRINT. Or more if your feets are teeny.
How are you set for milk?
Dude, it’s Texas. The sun came out today. Snow and ice? What snow and ice? It’s gone, except for the patches in the shade.
Tomorrow’s high is 60
Also here is another pic of a puppy loving snow.
http://twitpic.com/dt9n89
Here you go. Bon appetit.
http://www.evilmadscientist.com/2007/cooking-hot-dogs-via-electrocution/
Whew! I was worried about my wieners for a few.
Cute pup Dave. Mutt or AKC breed?
My kid rescued that pup from the streets in August. She mighta been 5 pounds, wormy, emaciated.. very week. Now she’s a bouncy knucklehead. I think but I ain’t sure she’s some kind of maltese/schnauzer mix.
Did anybody rear-end anybody else’s Pinto today?
Did anybody rear-end anybody else’s Pinto today?
Pups, I love that gif. Feel sorry for tard dog.
Oh boy, oh boy, my book finally shipped. I cannot wait to read this.
That book should come with opossums.
Dan got his severance package today. He gets to interview for a promotion, demote, or take the package and go on unemployment.
That book should come with opossums.
I think it comes with automatic scorn from nearly anyone who catches me reading it.
Retail is about to crap the bed.
Retail is about to crap the bed.
I suspect mid-level dining will too. My 401k bet will be golden, but the economy’s fucked in the short term.
Club Manager keeps saying we’ll be OK but I worry. Target did this consolidation 4 years ago. We have Target exes in corporate. I see the future and it sucks.
Leon, 0care is fucking mid-level dining too. I’ve been seeing local restaurants going under too. Thanks BS minimum wage hikes.
Firefighter for Leon
Nobody eats out anymore.
Waitresses expect too much.
Dan got his severance package today.
Well, shit. Sorry to hear that, Osita.
Alabama has no state minimum wage, but the restaurants have been going under anyway. I drive past three on the way to work that closed in 2009/2010 and still sit empty and for sale. Pretty sure raccoons are living in one.
Sorry, Oso. Maybe he’ll get a promotion.
Roamy, it is weird. Still in play. He just has options.
Cannibal raccoons?
He may get a promotion. I just hate the game.
GEN Amos is not universally loved as Commandant of the Marine Corps.
http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=James_F._Amos&oldid=591972254
Hometown Buffet is on Undercover Boss. OMG cheap ass bastadges.
Oso
Sorry to hear that
Read on the WSJ website today that they were doing that to 2300 enployees
Sorry to hear that Oso.
Seems like we’re all about to get another round of suck.
Zombie raccoons.
I think it was Larry the Cable Guy that said he looked forward to the New Year when people made resolutions to lose weight, it meant a shorter line at the Hometown Buffet.
xbradtc
I read that Wiki entry
wtf?
But the unemployment rate keeps going down in Obama’s economy -HOW can this be happening?
*takes off Elizabeth Warren headless and war paint*
Seriously, oso – sorry to hear that. Hope Dan is able to get rehired there.
XBrad, translate, please?
“After achieving the rank of General, he is still a boot.”
Remember this?
We are there, NOW.
http://theulstermanreport.com/2012/11/01/valerie-jarret-after-we-win-this-election-its-our-turn-payback-time-wsi/
D’Souza is the example…
Prayers for Dan’s job situation.
There’s a perfectly good restaurant location near my office anchored by a Kroger (Ralph’s for you westerners). It’s been empty for 3 years.
My Club only lost one salaried manager. WalMart is weird. They go out of their way to find a position for people. Dan still has several options.
Jeeze,
Xbrad,
Have numerous folks shitting on the Wiki page come to some kind of judgement?
Oso
At least they try
Better than just getting shitcanned
The gay mafia is out to get people who simply think they’re rather weird
TJ, I know. Been there done that with Target without the caring. WalMart really is different from the rest. Still not relaxing.
There’s a perfectly good restaurant location near my office anchored by a Kroger (Ralph’s for you westerners). It’s been empty for 3 years.
There’s a perfectly good grocery store in the middle of town here that used to be a Ralphs (Kroger for you easterners) that’s been vacant for more than five years. And this is one of the wealthier suburbs of L.A. County.
>> WalMart is weird. They go out of their way to find a position for people. Dan still has several options.
75% of their store managers came up from the department ranks,
DiT, WalMart is great. Target creates lots of their own problems by considering only college grads above the SR Team Lead level.
HERO
http://fmobserver.com/fargo-man-arrested-for-clearing-snow-with-flamethrower/
“four billion tons of white bullshit”
Oso, so sorry that Dan has to have that stress. (And you too.)
Hi, folks! Back for the night shift. My fam’s taking off and leaving me with Em for the night, which is exactly what I want. I’m starting to get tired of them.
Hey, oso – lots of prayers for you and Dan. I’m saying a lot of them, and adding y’all in doesn’t even take up any space. 🙂
Oh, I said Ososo.
Thanks guys. I’m stressing about the healthcare. Dan is finally taking the Oconamy seriously. He thought showing up and working was enough.
Hey Jazz! How are things looking today?
Seems like we’re all about to get another round of suck.
It will be reported as robust recovery.
2,300 jobs lost at Sam’s.
He thought showing up and working was enough.
I hope he’s seen the error of his ways.
Not gonna pretend like I was some kind of classy drunk (hello, store-brand vodka!) but the only one of those I ever had was Boone’s Farm.
Boone’s Farm Wild Mountain – It was so putrid my friend and I threw it away rather than drink it, after we had gone to such trouble to find someone to get it for us.
Mad Dog – it was a racy thing to do in our small town, so had to try it. (having sex was racier but I never even considered that in high school)
Cause I love ya all:
http://reallyghetto.com/page/24
Hey, Lip!
Here’s the scoop, as far as I can gather (I’m just getting here after taking a MUCH needed break):
Em’s doing better. Continued neurological improvement. Will get an MRI tomorrow, probably. Her heart rate has just started coming up in the last two hours to a point where it looks like she’ll be stable enough to withstand the hour or so that the MRI will take in the morning. She hasn’t had any significant conscious moments, but she does have intermittent, brief flights of awareness in which she’ll make her abject displeasure with the intubation known and will respond to voice commands. Her extremities are warm to the touch (yay – no more corpse hands!), and I can see her eyes moving under her lids. She’s still on a lot of drugs, and they have amnesia properties, so it’s unlikely she’s going to remember any of what’s going on now. She’s still on BP elevators; the docs gave her some meds when she was admitted, drugs that basically coagulate and encapsulate the substances she ingested so as to prevent absorption into her blood stream. They think that mass of stuff is still lodged in her bowels and is leeching a bit, so they’re giving her some powerful laxatives, and there’s gonna be a massive, massive dump coming. I can’t wait. 😀 The extent of brain damage is unknown, and she has liver and heart damage, but she’s alive and improving slowly. I’m still not putting the cart before the horse (and I’m praying my ass off), but, I’m optimistic now. I was faking optimism before, to be quite honest, but I’m really feeling better about things now. The docs still aren’t looking much beyond a 24-hour treatment plan, but tomorrow’s plan improves on today.
God bless you all for your continued prayers, well-wishes, positive thoughts, and encouragement. You’re aces. No joke – TRULY the best. Some folks here sent some eGift cards for eateries next to the hospital. Whoever thought of that is a GENIUS, and those gifts are the single most valuable thing anyone’s done for us other than prayer. What a truly amazing, kind, generous, and truly useful gift. My family is in awe of y’all. “Thank you” seems really trite right now, and I feel like a broken record, but, thank you for all your love and compassion. Y’all knock my socks off.
Prayers, Jazz. Love all y’all. Stressful day. Going to bed. Dan has until March to accept the package if he doesn’t get the promotion.
Same for you, oso. Thank you. Dan is lucky he’s got you. 😉
“Seems like we’re all about to get another round of suck.”
unexpectedly!
Glad to hear that the optimism is getting to be genuine, Jazz. You’re a great brother, btw.
Jazz, lots more good thoughts flowing your way from the left coast!
Heh. Some of these are pretty good.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/jenlewis/unretouched-photos-of-disney-princesses
When Em wakes up and sees the gorgeous stud nurse, you can tell her about how he was the one to witness the “massive dump”. hehehee
Happy BBF!!!!
Today it was 79 degrees in Sacramento. Good golfing weather. Too bad I have a job now.
Thanks, Sean. I work at it. This girl is special. She’s fragile and strong, if that makes any sense. If there were any way for me to spare her this, I’d do it in a second without hesitation.
BTW, for anyone who gets down about their situation in life, let me say this: You are more than the sum of your problems. The good you bring to those around you – that you may not even recognize – so far outweighs the weight of your problems that the comparison is of no use whatsoever. Your life is invaluable and irreplaceable. The world needs you. Do not let your troubles define you. YOU ARE NEEDED, even if you can’t see it. The ripples of your life touch shores you can’t see, and the world is a much, much better place for you being in it. Share your pain, because others want to help you bear it, if you will let them.
Please, please pass these thoughts on to anyone who may need them.
Lippy, I’mma be having fun with that – he’s working tonight again, and he’s dosing her with laxatives right now. 🙂
Please, please pass these thoughts on to anyone who may need them.
You have just done that. Thank you very much, Jazz.
I’m gonna get a pic with Todd the nurse before he leaves in the morning. He’s my favorite dude nurse ever. This guy rocks so fecking hard. My sis is gonna be mortified that he wiped her ass. 😀
What Lippy just said.
Sean?
I need a scifi movie to watch on Netflix. Any suggestions?
Mystery Science Theater is scifi, right? eerg, can’t help you due to being a chick.
good call. I’m an mst3k junkie. I can find something there to work 😀
“Mitchell” was fun. Joe Don Baker.
Mitchell!!
When I sing to my sister, I can watch her heart rate increase. How fucking cool is that?
Many of the best MST3K episodes are on You Tube
TJ, you saw it? Mitchell!!
Of course
It’s a classic
G’d eventide, TJ 😀 Thank you for the reach out the other day. I hope you don’t minimize your kindness – I appreciate it deeply.
Plus
The entire episode is on YouTube
Jazz
Go hang out at the Water Tower for a bit
Eat at M Burger or Food Ease and visit the big Lego store
Yer a good brother, Jazz
Mitchell…. I may have seen it. I like “name” movies. “Willard” is another I dig.
Fantastic news, Jazz! If Todd’s studly enough, maybe we can get Roamy to feature him in an upcoming HHD – he’s a hero for taking such good care of Em and your family.
And her heart rate going up when you sing to her is a good sign I would think. She’s still in there….
Thank you, Lippy. I’m not very good at accepting compliments gracefully. Y’all make me blush and embarrass me. This is easy to do, really. I love her, and she needs me, so I will do as she needs until she doesn’t need me anymore.
Jazz’s singing is pretty painful.
Hey, T! I was gonna call you tonight, but I’m just liking the time with Emmy right now. I’ll ring you tomorrow.
The docs use my singing on her ears like they used the pins on her extremities – to measure pain response. 😉
Todd just came to warn me about the huge, massive dump on the way again. He’s making this sound like I should be boarding up my house and moving inland.
Jazz, Em needs you right now (and you need her, funny as that may sound) – she is your only priority. Spend your time with her; don’t feel obligated to call me (but of course I’m always available if you just feel the need to talk!)
Make sure you head for high ground, Jazz.
Todd’s BTDT, Jazz – might want to heed the warning…. 😉
And I hope you’re writing all of this philosophical shit down – all of this eloquent waxing might score you some points with the ladies later on. They love that sensitive crap….
*runs*
Your mind works in very, very interesting ways, T. 😉 LOL – trading on my introspection for luv 😀 hahahahahah Man, if only…. 🙂
Seriously, by Todd’s comments, Em’s looming crap is being tracked by the NWS.
I’m gonna grab a movie. I’ll be back in about 90 minutes or so.
Prepare to be completely nauseated.
http://freebeacon.com/love-in-the-time-of-obama/
GO
That was painful;
You are a very very bad man
Those people should be neutered
I’ll let the Westies take it from here for the rest of the night shift. Give Em a gentle kiss from us (and one for you, too), and get some rest.
Is it possible to induce a sympathy crap?
I’m just asking for a friend….
Thanks, T!!! Have a great night, and I loved up Emmy for you. 🙂 Thank you for your sweet affection. Know that it’s returned.
Alex Jones is the bastard daughter of a sasquatch and a particularly dull bovine specimen.
Tomorrow night, my sister’s best friend is going to stay with me and Em all night. She’s a wonderful gal, soooo amazing. I can’t wait. It’s gonna be fun. I need to figure out how to steal her away from her boyfriend.
I followed a gif link to this guy, seems to make some good short movies.
Jazz
Funny..
I mentioned this here once
Alex Jones dad David was my roommate in college(UT/Austin) and I was with Dave when he met Alex’s mom
This is a pretty good review of the car I bought this summer, the guy is a little spastic / enthusiastic but accurate.
LOL – Well, I guess I just called your college roommate either a sasquatch or a particularly dull bovine specimen. If you liked them, I bet they’re nice folks, and I hope they weren’t wackos like their daughter turned out to be.
Good review, Pup! You like classic imports, huh? I’ve become a big fan of classic Japanese motorcycles, like old Kows and Yamahas.
Pups
Great looking car
That was Toyota’s heyday
I had a beautiful blue 1984 Landcruiser back then
Oh no
Dave is the most mellow guy on earth
and absolutely brilliant
I was 17 and he was 18, so we were just best friends for years
Carol is a gorgeous tall Texas blond girl and brilliant as well
Funny as hell
Alex has always been way out there
I spent so much time dreaming about Eleanor Bron
In my derp with the curtains drawn
See her in the arms of Paul
Say it, I can say no more
Derp?
Eleanor Bron?
Women in Love?
That’s a reference!
I keep singing “Crap on the way” to my sister, to the tune of “Fox on the Run.” She’s gonna murder me if she remembers it.
I’m more into Charlotte Bronte.
Heh.
NOT.
Eleanor Bron had kind of a horse face. Much like Hillary Swank.
Courtesy of Sean M.:
I’m basically singing Wings Greatest Hits to my sister now. 😉
I don’t need to know about your past
I just want one night with you no strings attached
I better clear this up: I’m NOT singing that last lyric to my sis. Just a tune I’m jamming on…