Because my time management skills are Teh Suxxor I will be unable to get a BBF post done for tomorrow. Mrs Rosetta and Floyd and I are heading to Nashville at the butt-crack of dawn for an in-law Christmas weekend and I have party plans tonight.
MJ graciously picked up the slack for me last week. Nice job, MJ! I will need another nice person to fill in for me tomorrow. If you are interested and able to fulfill the duties required, please stake a claim to tomorrow’s BBF post in the comments.
The pay isn’t good but at least you get to look at a lot of boobs.
Thank you in advance nice person.
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533 Comments
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Flawlessly naming puppies since March 2009 
Somebody better get The Constipated Baby Jesus a prune before he bursts a blood vessel.
This is the 3rd worst poat in the history of TittyWeb Jenkins!
I will BBF
Rosetta, thank you for that pic.
Stunning.
Nice work, Jazz! Thanks.
I look forward to seeing your choice.
http://tinyurl.com/pb3y9n
That’s my favorite ass pic.
Shut up, Dick.
Rosetta do you think after years of doing BBF that it is time to pass teh torch?
Dude…
>> If Pat Green would only cover a Jonny Cash tune.
Hahahaha
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAblq5HGZcY
I look forward to seeing your choice.
Looks like she had the Nuremburger with a side of Auschwitz fries.
Here is a pic of my ass
http://tinyurl.com/2egcg3s
Rosetta do you think after years of doing BBF that it is time to pass teh torch?
No way. As long as I still like doing them I’m going to continue to inflict them on everyone.
Why do you ask? Do you want to be my apprentice?
Hahahaha
Thanks for the video. Still have no idea what he sounds like or looks like.
But at least his 50 or so fans seem to like him.
I could study under you
Looks like she had the Nuremburger with a side of Auschwitz fries.
With onions?
That’s my favorite ass pic.
Is that part of a series? Or am I being ripped off, like with the cancellation of Terriers after only one season?
That’s my favorite ass pic.
Is that a Honda she’s in?
Here is a pic of my ass
Eeyore!
Those are some old school Calvin Klein’s’ she is wearing
She has her calling card in her right pocket.
Here is a pic of my ass
Nice looking asshole, iffin you ask me.
I could study under you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0PIdWdw15U
I could study under you
You’re a GENIUS!!!!
MCPO, MCPO is going to kick your ass for embedding that YouTube!
ANDY – What are you talking about? 😉
I lover herself MCPO she sent me the recipe today. I am making it on Sunday
Hahahaha
If a
tree fell in the forestcomment was posted and there was no one there tohearsee it …That story from The Hill about the House Dems pulling the tax bill from the floor?
HILARIOUS!!!!!!
Rosetta, did you answer my question on Herr’s picture?
Nice looking asshole, iffin you ask me.
I see what you did there
did you answer my question on Herr’s picture?
You put a question on Herr’s picture?
Here is a pic of my ass
Looks skinny from here. Bring it a little closer.
Whose turn is it to kill Agile?
Whose turn is it to kill Agile?
Aw, we have to be nice to him today. He had a hard day at work.
http://tinyurl.com/3xntn67
omg….I read that as “Whose turn is it to kill AGGIE?
Where’s Aggie been today? So quiet without her.
Speak of the lurker!
.I read that as “Whose turn is it to kill AGGIE?
I did a double take. I didn’t read AD the first time, either.
I’ve been busy… did a booze poat, stopped the dogs from killing each other, started dinner, yelled at my MIL… the usual, Jazz.
Aw, we have to be nice to him today. He had a hard day at work.
http://tinyurl.com/3xntn67
I lol’d.
I lol’d.
That’s why we keep you around.
Your extra-curriculars are interfering with your priorities, Aggie.
I was out in the frickin’ freezing frickin’ cold this afternoon and I’m still frickin’ freezing.
yelled at my MIL
Yeah, sure. . . ya talk big here.
Hotspur, I’d have thought last night would have kept you warm for many days.
Your extra-curriculars are interfering with your priorities, Aggie.
Shit, don’t I know it… What the fuck happened to all of those self-cleaning houses featured in those 50s “Houses of the Future” films??
Hotspur, 2pm: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRoA1hfjOVI#t=0m10s
Mare, it’s Michigan. It only lasts a few hours.
http://is.gd/iRJap
MCPO, I can yell at my MIL because A) she knows I love her, B ) I do NOT put up with shit, and C) Hubby comes first.
Loooooong day. Hello, Hostages!
Hey, Rosetta, want some help with that yard work?
http://tinyurl.com/284ygj9
Uh… Nevermind.
Oh, and I need to confess how evil I am. I forwarded links for both “Baby Monkey” and “Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell” to a co-worker. I figure it’s good revenge for him not wearing deodorant this summer.
Howdy, Roamy!!!
Michigan, yes, that explains it.
Ouch, lauraw.
Hey, romy!
howdy Romay!
I hope Floyd gets the worst gas ever on the road trip to Nashville.
seriously Jazz, where did they think that was going to go?
Hey, Rosetta, want some help with that yard work?
Yeah, that sucks and all, but now the real fun starts.
Getting rid of the stump.
Getting rid of the stump.
So that was Scott, then?
Getting rid of the
stumphump.A Christmas song that hasn’t been played 55,789,223 times!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqmwA7rd9EE
seriously Jazz, where did they think that was going to go?
If we ever meet in person and you’re drunk enough to tolerate me telling a story, my Polish family has an epic story about my grandmother’s pride in her 100% Polish pedigree, a geriatric non-English-speaking Polish immigrant, a garage, a tree, and – in the words of my grandmother – the legendary “Polish woodcutter’s technique.” It predictably ends in tragic disarray, but it’s funny, nonetheless.
>> A Christmas song that hasn’t been played 55,789,223 times!
For good reason
Hm…congrats, Dick?
Buenos tardes, Hostages. Happy to report that my SS arrived today…mmmm….Amazon….the suspense is KILLING me!
And meanwhile, it’s pouring buckets here in Phoenix. Scheduled for a sprinting workout today, but I have to confess that I’m not too disappointed to bail because I’ve had a banger of a hangover headache today. How the hell can you get a hangover from three IPAs? Man, I feel auld.
Yeah, that sucks and all, but now the real fun starts.
Did you see how rotted the trunk was? That stump could be a far worse job – it could be uncompromised.
I can’t wait Jazz!
I can’t wait Jazz!
You’re just anticipating the buzz. 😛
are we opening our gifts Sunday night?
DRIVE TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111
Is Sunday the 20th? We’re doing it the 20th, sohos.
Yes, I fucking plugged it in!!!! 😛
Andy, the sucky radio stations here are playing the same 15 Christmas songs over and over. If I hear “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” one more time, I’m going postal. I’m ashamed to admit I’m tired of Bing Crosby!!!! And don’t get me started on John Lennon and “So This Is Christmas”. ARGH
Roamy, how did I go this long without having heard the Taco Bell/Pizza Slut song? And more important, how can I get those brain cells back, now that I have?
It’s a shame you don’t have a good Christmas CD you could listen to 🙂
Jakeman, you missed it when Rosetta called wiser, who handed the phone to lauraw so she could hear Pizza Hut/Taco Bell. I heard the screaming and cursing from here.
Nice work, Jazz! Thanks.
I look forward to seeing your choice.
http://tinyurl.com/pb3y9n
I hate to admit it, but clicking on that young lass made me laugh hard.
Rosetta, I’ll ask you the same question I asked Steve Martin back in ’76: How can you be so fuckin’ funny?
The one thing I love about John Lennon:
His absence.
Andy, I think Mr. RFH klepped that one.
“Rosetta, I’ll ask you the same question I asked Steve Martin back in ’76: How can you be so fuckin’ funny?”
Pendejo, be careful, I said that once and Wiser commented, “COME ON, why don’t you just F**k already???”
hahahahahahah
If this isn’t the most annoying Christmas song, it’s close: You Fruitcake
A judge sentences a three time loser to life in prison.
The prisoner says, “Judge have a bit of mercy on me. I can’t do life in prison. I just can’t bare the thought of spending the rest of my life in prison. Please just give me this one break.”
Judge replies, “Ehhhh….do what you can.”
I don’t know why, but that joke makes me laugh. Wait……I didn’t read that one on here, did I?
“The one thing I love about John Lennon:
His absence”
Smooooooooooooch!
Smooooooooooooch!
Now all the Hostages will want pics of Aggie and mare making out…
Aggie, I’m with ya on the John Lennon thing. I just don’t get what people heard/saw in his stuff, and Yoko is a crime against humanity.
>> Now all the Hostages will want pics of Aggie and mare making out…
*thud*
Thanks for the heads up mare. I guess I’d forgotten that anything other than scorn, insults, and derision can get you labeled around here.
(But that fucker does make me laugh consistantly. Even though half the shit he links won’t open from work.)
“The one thing I love about John Lennon:
His absencepictures of his naked widow with accompanying soundtrack”Fixt
Off to another fucking Christmas party. I think the punch will have a dose of Valu-Rite tongiht though. Last night was brutal.
I oughta charge a toll for all you broke dicks to drive on this poat.
I shaved your mom’s back for this?
Life Lesson from the Hostages #2,175
Log out of Amazon before clicking on Hostage links to weird shit. I’m getting recommendations for odd fiction, ricers, and, of course, (this is my own damn fault) inflatable sheep.
Who’s live-blogging Larry King’s last broadcast tonight?
FUCKING AWESOME!!!
Who’s live-blogging Larry King’s last broadcast tonight?
Suddenly, going to a middle-school Christmas Concert doesn’t sound so horrible…..
Looks like we might have a new victim.
Live on Larry King tonight! Middle-school Christmas Concert!
Hostpur, what color corset are you wearing right now?
okay, 2nd double martini is drunk. I guess I’m ready for the concert now.
bbl.
So, what is the protocol for a newbie?! I have been reading this intertube site for some time now and feel the level of intelligence is fairly equal to mine.
Got my GED in ’84… you?
I don’t know why, but that joke makes me laugh. Wait……I didn’t read that one on here, did I?
Yes you did, ha!
Got my GED in ’84… you?
Don’t go shoving your pretentious credentials at me, pal!
Got my GED in ’84… you?
OOOO, look at the big show-off smarty pants trying to act all big.
😉
Protocol for a newbie is to bring us all beers and sammiches. Hop, now.
Who’s in charge of the Welcome Baskets this week?
Show off, hell – it only took 3 times to pass it. I was almost immediately recruited for gubment work, declined on moral grounds.
Hostpur, what color corset are you wearing right now?
I’m colorblind. Ask your mom.
T2D – Why are you here? And why did you send me this video?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9u4zdlFF10
“Protocol for a newbie is to bring us all beers and sammiches. Hop, now.”
hot dam, this is going to be easy..! Lone Star Lite and mustard sammiches all around!
So, what is the protocol for a newbie?! I have been reading this intertube site for some time now and feel the level of intelligence is fairly equal to mine.
Got my GED in ’84… you?
You have a GED?
Braggart.
“T2D – Why are you here? And why did you send me this video?”
I sell those – still plenty of time to ship! How many?
Hahahahaha. Nice avatar, jakeman.
T2D, when xBad gets here, be sure and introduce yourself. Ask him about his favorite citrus grower.
Lone Star Lite and mustard sammiches all around!
*barf*
Make mine ginger ale and a grilled cheese. Chop-chop.
I aim to please, Rosetta. Earlier today I uploaded the green skeleton image from Nigel’s t-shirt in Spinal Tap, but C arin shut me down ’cause it wasn’t Chris-missy enough.
Thank God California is adopting cap-and-trade. They need something to slow down the massive unsustainable growth in their economy.
What’s a GED?
Listen or DIE!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VzQll62JgUA
Rosie, if you haven’t read VDH’s Two Californias, and you are in a reasonably mellow mood tonight, don’t.
Hotspur –
10-4
Chief, I got 2 notes into that and pulled the ripcord, lest it crack my computer screen. Jeebus.
jakeman – It’s funny as hell.
Rosie, if you haven’t read VDH’s two California’s and you are in a reasonably mellow mood tonight, don’t.
I know about the article but haven’t read it yet. I will tomorrow and then I will laugh and laugh and laugh.
And then I will buy a gun in case the government tries to tax me to pay for those fucking idiots.
Bosk –
GED is what they give you if you want to design houses for a living. Good Enough to be a Designer (GED).
Mini 14
OK Romy…you are freaking me out. I sent those same two songs to a cow orker today.
I swear to dog I did.
I tried again. Made it 34 seconds before that woman’s voice started to send me into epileptic fits.
T2D, you and I have stuff in common. Spent 17 years in architecture. Started my building business in ’84. SYWM, Rosie.
Where do you live?
HS – a burb of Nashville – Franklin. I have offices in Houston and here. Been at it for a few years. Where do you build?
Back from taking eldest to get her hair chopped off. Howdy to the newbies!!
*buys the first round*
MMAAAAAAAARRRREEEE!
Yes that’s really me in the PoL pic. And I really did almost miss that deer.
Hola, bitches.
‘sup, n00b?
I hope for Christmas that the property management company on my previous apartment gets a nice case of herpes, plus some hep, plus a little bit of the clap, and maybe some syph thrown in. Fucking asshole bastards docked my deposit 175 bucks b/c they had to repaint a fucking wall b/c the assface that had the apt before me painted a douchetastic “focal” wall. Except, the man that owned the apartment bldg when I signed my agreement told me that it was no big deal, and they didn’t have the color to match the rest of the walls anyway.
Nada, chillin’
Hola, bitches.
BRAD!!!!!
*smoooooch*
Taxed, Ann Arbor. I only do custom, and design/build, which essentially equates to remodeling, as there is zero new construction. Not that I’m complaining, we were big in remodeling before our state became a third world shit hole.
I hope you’re doing well. But I assume you need lessons in how to remove a potato from your ass, or you wouldn’t have delurked.
doing well as in doing better?! Its been a rough couple of years, but it appears there is a light… Houston has sustained me while Nashville is trying to dig itself out.
Custom is my thing – please check it: http://www.gmlanddesigner.com
not trying to pimp myself, just sharing by means of introduction, unless you see a plan you like then, by all means, let’s do biz!
Aggie!!!
**smoochies**
Aggie:
http://tinyurl.com/2657set
GIg em! I originally enrolled at A&M, but scholarshipped over to Southwest Texas State. An Aggie at heart though!
Taxed, I’ll check you out. I’m in my favorite tavern, three indians.
Tomorrow.
http://tinyurl.com/28whdg6
Sure, I want to see the noob picture from Jazz, and he’s gone. Nice.
Welcome, taxed2death!
Holy carp, HM. How fast do you think he was going? (And what’s his life expectancy?)
minana…
GIg em! I originally enrolled at A&M, but scholarshipped over to Southwest Texas State. An Aggie at heart though!
Nice! Texas State is just up the road aways from me 🙂
And having attended A&M makes you a Former Student ™!! What class?
Thx Jay – I feel the love!
Sup, taxed?
Stay away from wiser when he’s been drinking.
LC – would have been 88′.
ok you guys, ya gotta try ancestry.com right now they’re having a 14 day free trial
I’ve spent all day not studying and found out I’m a Daughter of the American Revolution on my mom’s side (whatever the hell that means, but I’m a direct descendant) and a direct descendant of Richard Warren, I like to call him “Dick” cuz we’re family and all, he came over on the Mayflower and was the 12th signer of the Mayflower Compact.
This shit is fun
Who knew? I thought we were all lame drunks
Yeah, he gets grabby.
How fast do you think he was going?
I think the speed is exaggerated by the camera, but he was hauling ass. As for life expectancy, not good.
Herr – thanks for the head’s up! Exactly when doesn’t he drink?!
oh and yeah, I share blood with Franklin Delano Roosevelt by way of Delano, but I’m not proud of that part.
Oh and two saints. St. Clotilde and I can’t remember the other one. I can trace my dad’s family so far back to the 1300’s because apparently the British keep really good records
And I would like to lodge a hearty fuck you to every asshat who thinks that riding someone ass the morning after a sleet/snow storm is a good idea.
PJM, make sure to register yourself as a DAR. They give scholarships and shit to kids.
As do Mayflower descendants, IIRC.
LC – would have been 88′.
I’m Class of ’89. Wanna go to the Chicken? 😉
T2d – Beautiful designs. Got anything for a disabled vet on a fixt income up in Appalachia?
Howdy taxed2 death!!
We got back to 15th c. England on my Mom’s side. On my father’s side, no records survived the firebombing during that little misunderstanding in the 40s.
Legend has it that the Black Devil hit 140 on that run – one of my minions is in riding club and this guy is legend(wait for it)ary.
Men in their 20’s are getting their eyebrows waxed. Like, sculpted. Like a girl. I have seen this.
They look weird. It’s not a good look.
I don’t know what this world is coming to. But it’s for sure that we can all blame Bart.
The Chicken?! Any friggin time! I lost one of my most epic fights in that place… ahh, memories!
Howdy Momma!
I lost one of my most epic fights in that place… ahh, memories!
This should be good…. Do tell!
They give scholarships and shit to kids.
Hello.
Did not know that.
PJM, make sure to register yourself as a DAR. They give scholarships and shit to kids.
As do Mayflower descendants, IIRC.
ooooooooh, I had NO idea. mwahaha hahaha
Men in their 20′s are getting their eyebrows waxed.
I ain’t gonna suck myself.
But it’s for sure that we can all blame Bart.
hahahaha
I’m also related to two, count ’em TWO saints.
The resemblance is uncanny
Men waxing their eyebrows??
No wonder society is in the toilet.
well, didn’t some man we know from Texas get his hands manicured, or stuck in wax or something to soften ’em up?
hhhhmmmmmmm
Peej, I worked for two summers at Plymouth Rock. (My hometown is just north of there.) We were knee-deep in all that Mayflower stuff — usually we were just dressed up in park ranger khakis, but occasionally got conscripted into wearing Pilgrim gear for special events. But to the best of my knowledge, I’m just a northern European mutt, no famous relatives…
I’m also related to two, count ‘em TWO saints.
Reggie Bush and Marques Colston?
I’m also related to two, count ‘em TWO saints.
I think we have a few in my family as well. I have over 93 first cousins on my mom’s side, so the odds for it in my ancestry are pretty good.
I’ve never waxed any part of my body.
“This should be good…. Do tell!”
It involved my jaw, a bottle of tequila and a lineman’s fist – my friend’s said I passed out gracefully… I thought the floor was falling up and just laid there to keep it down.
jakeman, you’d be surprised. It’s been fun doing this because other people have done all the work and ancestry.com connects you to them and if they have the same birthdates down and records, then you accept their “hints” and by accepting them, it leads you to more info about your history.
This website has GOT to be owned by the Mormon church
well, didn’t some man we know from Texas get his hands manicured, or stuck in wax or something to soften ‘em up?
Could have been Pendejo…. for sure it wasn’t Dick 😉
MCPO – disabled vet?! You find one you like and I send it to you FREE! The least I could do.
On my mother’s side we are descended from William of Orange.
My father’s family was brewers.
It’s a toss-up.
Her daddy was a midget
Her Momma was a whore
Her grand dad was a newsboy ’til he was 84. . .
ATTENTION HOTSAUSAGES! I BRING YOU A GIFT…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5_sfnQDr1-o
My father’s family was brewers.
That is awesome. And I’d like to note that I saw your picture on POL and you are an old man. Almost as old as mcpo, apparently.
Brewfan – you almost never see that anymore!
T2D – If I only had the money to build it. I know of a beautiful piece of land with fresh water, wild turkeys, deer and views to die for. Too bad Herself won’t let me leave the valley!
It involved my jaw, a bottle of tequila and a lineman’s fist
Well, on the upside, at least it didn’t involve your jaw, a bottle of Bartles and James, and some sorority bowhead 😉
The PoL picture is after no sleep, 3 hours in the cold and wind, and gutting a deer. It adds about 10 years to me.
Well, on the upside, at least it didn’t involve your jaw, a bottle of Bartles and James, and some sorority bowhead
Or your ass, some white wine, and techno music. NTTAWWT.
MCPO – the offer stands.
H/M – Tell Brew to STFU. He’s 3 years older than me!
Jaw – Tequila – Lineman. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!
Could have been Pendejo…. for sure it wasn’t Dick
*cough*DaveinTexas*cough*
Tell Brew to STFU. He’s 3 years older than me!
He types well.
Why haven’t we seen Baby Monkey on RedEye? Seems it would be right up Gutfeld’s alley.
MCPO?
http://bit.ly/fvDfMj
On my mother’s side we are descended from William of Orange.
OMG!! I LOVE oranges!!!
“Or your ass, some white wine, and techno music. NTTAWWT.”
I always tried to stay reasonably sober when visiting friends in Austin!
Who knew? I thought we were all lame drunks
*Hic* Whashu talkin bout girly! *Hic*
taint – Appletini – mime
Junk–PBR–Fireworks
nipples – spritzer – michael moore
Yah, PJM, I’m pretty sure there’s Momomentum behind it.
Woo hoo!
Our Secret Santa gift arrived today. I am so excited.
Sister-Bourbon-The Lakers
He’s 3 years older than me!
I.
feelings – sex on the beach – barbra streisand
Baby monkey never gets old, t2d. Never.
Man, there are a lot of n00bs around here lately.
The PoL picture is after no sleep, 3 hours in the cold and wind, and gutting a deer. It adds about 10 years to me.
Damn, this place is full of whiners.
By the way, my frickin computer is broken. This sucks. It just won’t turn on. Yes, it is plugged in. I can’t fix it. Gonna have to take it to Best Buy and let the Geek Squad look at it.
prostate – Cosmopolitan – Rachel Maddow
Woo hoo!
Our Secret Santa gift arrived today. I am so excited
If it was ticking, I’m pretty sure that it was meant to be yours, not Cathy’s.
nite all – its been swell.
By the way, my frickin computer is broken. This sucks. It just won’t turn on. Yes, it is plugged in. I can’t fix it. Gonna have to take it to Best Buy and let the Geek Squad look at it.
While you’re there, get a new network card for mine. It keeps crapping out the last couple of days, and no it isn’t because of Brad’s farm porn habit.
Gonna have to take it to Best Buy and let the Geek Squad look at it.
Better make sure the barnyard pron is deleted first
My ancestors came to Ireland from Scotland after being convicted of buggering sheep. So, I’m pretty sure I’m related to Sean.
‘Night, T2D. Come around again so we can make fun of xBrad together!
MCPO?
————————-
I think he’s the chap on the right.
http://is.gd/iS6O1
grilling jalepeno and cheese stuffed snausages
I think he’s the chap on the right.
The one giving the guy in front of him a reach-around? Yep, thats him.
Morgenholtz?
http://tinyurl.com/26k7fdt
MJ – I was a Master Chief. Therefore, I was directing the guys with the oars.
Michael’s power is out.
MJ – I was a Master Chief. Therefore, I was directing the guys with the oars.
—————-
I meant left, but was to slow to back up the comment. You would have been the fellow on the left NOT right.
>> Michael’s power is out.
Again?
Morgenholtz?
http://tinyurl.com/26k7fdt
Not even I’m that stupid.
Wait….
Better make sure the barnyard pron is deleted first
See, I can’t do that if I can’t turn it on. I just have to hope the Geek Squad has a sense of humor.
Speaking of great moments in “The H2: Is It Plugged In?”, I get the luxury of buying a nice, new upstairs air handler tomorrow.
BANGLAR OLD HOUSE!!!
Finally have my laptop back. What did I miss?
MJ, are you trying to say MCPO is old enough to have been carved into stone?
Finally have my laptop back. What did I miss?
——————-
All of the hostages except for me finally came out of the closet. How YOU doin?
Andy??!!
NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yil2jWQ5Oqg
All of the hostages except for me finally came out of the closet. How YOU doin?
What do you mean, “finally”??
MJ, are you trying to say MCPO is old enough to have been carved into stone?
——————–
Eh, it was a lame joke. In a way it lent prestige, yet age.
MJ got tangled in the hangers. He’ll be along directly.
MJ’s in the closet?
HM, next time you go deer hunting in cold weather, take a big ole bag of gluten with you to munch on. It will keep you warm and youthful-looking.
I thought everybody knew that.
>> All of the hostages except for me finally came out of the closet. How YOU doin?
Hahahahaha. We were just in there shotgunning beer and chasing with Jaeger.
Has everyone received their SS gifts already??
Andy,
How did you get a air handler without a compressor?
I need a 2-1/2 ton AH, my compressor is fine, but no one will sell me the AH.
Government regulations and all.
Hahahahaha. We were just in there shotgunning beer and chasing with Jaeger.
—————–
Then why the requests for more Asstroglide™ and to turn up the Lionel Richie?
‘Hello? Is it my junk you’re looking for?’
oops
I have to confess PJG was me. Sorry.
We were just in there shotgunning beer and chasing with Jaeger.
Oh gag,
And I got my SS gift, and I know my SS gift was delivered.
Andy??!!
NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yil2jWQ5Oqg
Meh. That was last week.
This should … *crosses fingers* … be the last domino to fall on this POS that I can’t just take care of myself.
And I’d actually do this one but for the fact that the new one’s going to tie into our boiler (insane oil-fired yankee heating contraption).
My SS gift better not be a stripper named Roberta….
Michael did his genealogy and found out he’s related to Prince, Edward.
http://tinyurl.com/367dwzc
We got a shot at a blizzard for Sunday and Monday.
It’s for the heating side, vmax. Air handler + hydronic coil.
>> ‘Hello? Is it my junk you’re looking for?’
Hahahahahaha!!!! *snort*
You have to work tomorrow Vmax?
Dinner time.
PJ, I’m related to Chief Five Killer. No way I’ll be able to break his record.
Michael did his geneology and found out he’s related to Prince, Edward.
Is Prince Edward jealous of his Prince Albert?
My SS should get their gift tomorrow or monday at the latest.
I noticed today that I got a SS gift from Santa at the address I mailed my gift to.
Xbad is evil.
Water on an electrical fire? Wise choice.
Have to admit I did the same thing once. I came home to a house filled with smoke and found the washing machine on fire.
No Work MJ,
I quit my semi employed job when my boss cut my pay by $3.00 / hr Take it or leave it.
And did not pay me for 10 hours
Do you know of anything?
My SS gift better not be a stripper named Roberta….
If you do maybe we can trade later?
If you do maybe we can trade later?
You got first dibs.
Looks like the porked-up omnibus POS is dead.
MJ
You are saying that if I get a new heating element I can get a AH?
(there has got to be a loophole, did you find it?)
We got a shot at a blizzard for Sunday and Monday.
BABY BLIZZARD WOOHOO! BABY BLIZZARD WOOHOO!
Snowing on the ground, baby blizzard
Hi PJM
I was teasing you up thread.
Don’t bother it was not funny, but I snickered a little. I am obviously warped and twisted.
MJ
You are saying that if I get a new heating element I can get a AH?
(there has got to be a loophole, did you find it?)
MJ or me?
My unit that’s getting replaced is just a heater. The upstairs A/C is a completely separate unit in the attic (yes, this is kind of fucked up).
A little mood booster for your evening pleasure: http://is.gd/iSbOf
oops,
sorry Andy
Now I get why my dad’s side is traced back to a long time ago
I’m related a direct descendant of this chick too
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alice_de_Lusignan,_Countess_of_Surrey
I always felt my dad’s side of the family had an air about them. It always smelled like failure in my mind, however
oh I missed it vmax.
How are ya anyways?
HOWS.YOUR.SHOULDER.TODAY.PJ?
http://tinyurl.com/29gthjn
Vman – Did you get bitten by any of your dogs today?
HOWS.YOUR.SHOULDER.TODAY.PJ?
I think you fixed it. Well, that and the 5 inch needle full of lidocaine and steroids the doctor stuck in my arm today
Great PJM,
How are you and yours?
My Grandpa all ways said http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Bridger
Was his relation
Could be myth, could be fact.
very cool vmax!
you can find out on ancestry right now yannow, it’s free
No bites MCPO,
Or accidents from the ancient one Ruby!
She has to be older than you MCPO.
I am betting she is 144 in dog years.
I should go work for that company
also, I’m determined not to be the last commenter of the night. I’ve been IT three effing nights in a row
I have been tempted PJM,
Maybe later, I am funemployeed, I do not need any further charges to my CC.
Brewfan & Aggie;
if she doesn’t have a beard (on her face that is) and is older than 21’ish… (ok 40 or so)i’ll arm wrestle for her….
Has everyone received their SS gifts already??
Yeah, I think everyone except Wiserbud.
I’m still waiting for mine *crosses fingers for Roberta the Stripper™*
I have been tempted PJM,
Maybe later, I am funemployeed, I do not need any further charges to my CC.
IT’S FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
no, I have not received my gift, but I know my SS has received theirs. I hope to God they don’t get in trouble for the marijuana.
I left you a comment upstream, PJ.
>> Has everyone received their SS gifts already??
I haven’t. And I don’t think mine’s been delivered yet, either.
Our SS gift is wrapped with gift paper that is a salvaged brown paper bag.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
This is already funny.
Did anybody hit anybody else with a folding chair today?
PA – How you be sweetie!?
Sean!! PJM found out that you and I are related!!!
Andy – I see your boy is coming out big for DADT!
Roberta Busby, Stripper Set on Fire, Blasts Attacker: You’ll “Answer to God”
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504083_162-6269963-504083.html
good luck Brew… i’m out…
Hi, MCPO. I found out the cookies you call peanut butter is the one I called chocolate chip. They’re delish!
Did anybody hit anybody else with a folding chair today?
Not yet. I think we are all kinda waiting for Dave to show up.
PJ, I’m related to Chief Five Killer. No way I’ll be able to break his record.
hahahahahaha, you only got 4 to go! STEP ON IT!!!!!!1
I ate my first Orange today from my Christmas Orange tree. It was tart.
I was hoping all the cold weather would bring the sugar out. The drought hurt this Orange. I will try a larger one tomorrow. Or wait till Christmas.
PA – They are my favorites! PB/choco chip!!!
>> Andy – I see your boy is coming out big for DADT!
Yeah. What can you do?
It’s not like Coakley would’ve voted differently.
Andy – I see your boy is coming out big
for DADT!Tom Brady?
PJM – Are we gonna get Christmas pictures of your kids this year?
Michael, are you already retired or waiting for a date to retire?
Well, hope springs eternal. . .
http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D9K5BA5O0&show_article=1
Burn Notice is on!
*walks in with a shotgun and a couple grenades.
Already retired, PA. I have not been to work since 11/30. Actually, I just burned through the last of my vacation days yesterday and am officially retired as of today.
Andy – I’m surprised. I really can’t understand this push. DADT works. How will open homosexuality, with all the attendant “diversity guidance”, enhance readiness?
Rosetta:
why did you feature your daughter in a post….
?
that’s just wrong.
oh… and the ticket that’s in her pocket…. looks like it’s already been punched.
PJM – Are we gonna get Christmas pictures of your kids this year?
Who?
Michael – Congratulations. You’ll have to bring your sticks to the next meat-up and we’ll knock the ball around.
Thanks, Michael. Are you investigating hobbies?
Fuckin’ A!
L,R – Allen West, Eric Cantor
http://bit.ly/dR3WkR
That was a rhetorical question, right Chief?
Sean!! PJM found out that you and I are related!!!
No. No. That’s not true. That’s impossible!
Sweet, direct descendant of a crusader, then my family line turned Huguenot
>> then my family line turned Huguenot
You mean gay for french cars?
Whoa.
Are you investigating hobbies?
Yes. I am going to annoy my children until their astounding lack of fertility has been cured and they produce grandchildren for my amusement.
Also, we’re looking at some motorcycle trips. The nice thing about being retired is that if it is raining, you just stay where you are. You are not on a schedule.
Also planning a trip to Costa Rica.
And now, a trip to Florida so MCPO can give me some golf lessons. I really suck. My clubs were purchased at Wal-Mart.
No. No. That’s not true. That’s impossible!
actually, we’re conjoined twins separated at birth.
I got the brains
>> I got the brains
And the …
Nope. Not gonna do it.
Andy – Not sure it’s rhetorical. I invested my adult life in that organization.
I meant trying to understand their rationale.
I just don’t get it.
You mean gay for french cars?
Whoa.
Sorry, I meant Yugo
Michael – I can shave 5 strokes off your game – tonight.
Go to your local PGA professional and get a club fitting. You’re 6 ft 3? I imagine you need at least a quarter to a half inch added to the shafts and the lie angle will be 2 degrees upright.
If he skips the first hole he can shave 9 strokes.
>> Michael – I can shave 5 strokes off your game – tonight.
Try thinking of the names of baseball players. Or just concentrate on unhappy childhood memories. That can get you, 5 to 7 more strokes easy.
>> Sorry, I meant Yugo
You’re Venezuelan?
Hi everyone. What’s up?
Try thinking of the names of baseball players. Or just concentrate on unhappy childhood memories. That can get you, 5 to 7 more strokes easy.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Dead Puppies!
Carin – I owe you an email, don’t I?
>> Dead Puppies!
in an emergency, yeah.
Yes you do, Sir!
>> That can get you, 5 to 7
morestrokes easy.FIFY
That story from The Hill about the House Dems pulling the tax bill from the floor?
HILARIOUS!!!!!!
What story?
Or just concentrate on unhappy childhood memories. That can get you, 5 to 7 more strokes easy.
I’m not going to play golf while I cry. I have some dignity.
Not much, because I show up here, but a little.
actually, we’re conjoined twins separated at birth.
I got the brains
No, I got the brains. You got the looks. Let’s make lots of money.
OH. Someone at the gym gave me this recipe:
take those … cheesits? I think that’s what they’re called. Make a sammich of peanut butter with two of ’em then dip into melted chocolate (semi-sweet – I guess).
Then freeze.
They’re supposed to be delish.
I believe there’s a “whooshing” sound, flyin over Michael’s head right about now.
Chief doesn’t have to worry about Alzheimer’s just yet. He zeroed in on it like a beagle on a t-bone.
Yes. I am going to annoy my children until their astounding lack of fertility has been cured and they produce grandchildren for my amusement.
Ha ha haa …
“And now, a trip to Florida so MCPO can give me some golf lessons. I really suck. My clubs were purchased at Wal-Mart.”
Cathy would love Herself and vice versa.
You were close, Chief. I’m 6-4. And you are right. I’ve been told that my cheap clubs are too short.
But give me credit. I bought the very best clubs that WalMart was offering at the time. They are named after a pro who won a PGA tournament once or twice. I forget his name.
Carin, how did you like the crinkles?
Protocol for a newbie is to bring us all beers and sammiches. Hop, now.
I think we should test newbies by allowing me to go on and on about my fitness routines.
Based on when they (finally) tell me to STFU, we’ll know whether they’re hostage material.
My son ate all the crinkles before I could try them.
I mean, I’m mostly baking, not really eating. But, COME ON.
I think we should test newbies by allowing me to go on and on about my fitness routines.
Based on when they (finally) tell me to STFU, we’ll know whether they’re hostage material.
You forgot about the gluten. So much talk about gluten…
“My son ate all the crinkles”
Hahahaha
I believe there’s a “whooshing” sound, flyin over Michael’s head right about now.
That’s actually the sound of a folding chair aimed at your head.
Stand still.
Michael’s TV hat is muting the whooshing sounds,
Gluten jokes are actually the funniest thing about this site right now.
It’s funny ’cause everyone has different cookies they like. Matt likes the gingerbread. Ethan ate the Crinkles, and now is moving in on the sugar cookies. Mr Car in likes the bar thingies I made. One of those easy bar things, I can’t memember the name. Grahm cracker crumbs, butter, walnuts, chocolate chips, coconut, topped with condensed milk.
He told me I need to make another batch of those.
>> Stand still.
If you were shorter you could connect.
Try a pitching wedge Tiger.
Have you tried Hazels cookies yet Car in?
Carin – Check your email!!
If you were shorter you could connect.
If you were bobbing in the water, I could connect.
Seriously, any club I use has a Water Detection Aiming System that I can’t figure out how to turn off.
Dave doesn’t bob.
Hazels? No. I’ll check on ’em later.
Child #2 needs the ‘puter.
>> Dave doesn’t bob.
Oh you bitch.
OK, the California new year’s trip is now fully booked.
I have a room with 2 queen beds at the gheyest hotel in Palm Springs (and that’s saying something) if you want to want to come over, Sean.
Sets blood to boil: http://formerspook.blogspot.com/2010/10/hey-ive-got-idea-let-saddam-shoot-down.html
Paul Ryan on the tax bill:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHcXtG_C3qM
I wonder if he has plans for new year’s?
I have a room with 2 queen beds at the gheyest hotel in Palm Springs (and that’s saying something) if you want to want to come over, Sean.
You know, you could probably do a better job of selling that, but shoot me an email.
breacanyonmonument at yahoo dot com
Off to watch Trebek.
I’m watching ‘Prime Suspect’ with Helen Mirren.
>> Helen Mirren.
Yeah, wow, she was somethin, before electricity, wasn’t she?
well, didn’t some man we know from Texas get his hands manicured, or stuck in wax or something to soften ‘em up?
Could have been Pendejo…. for sure it wasn’t Dick
MOTHERFUCKER!!!! IT’S ON LIKE DONKEY KONG!!!!
DinT – I didn’t mind cranking the projector!
Bet she’s up for makin’ $14 the hard way.
The NFL Network sideline babe is o.k., but she’s no http://bit.ly/hai6zN
Could have been Pendejo…. for sure it wasn’t Dick
*cough*DaveinTexas*cough*
Thanks PJM. My man card has been restored. Just for that I’ma save you a spot in my nuclear fallout bunker. The rest of these brokedicks are dust in the wind.
So, will Harry and his fucking asses get DADT and DREAM??
I bet I can still find a picture of Dave getting his hands hot-waxed.
If somebody hits my PayPal account.
My prediction:
DADT – yes
DREAM – no
Just for that I’ma save you a spot in my nuclear fallout bunker. The rest of these brokedicks are dust in the wind.
I’ll just show up with the only surviving collection of vintage Hustler magazines. You will open the hatch for me.
I’ll bet I can find a picture of a really nice guest towel that likely got tossed in the rubbish.
I say likely, because that’s the safe bet. But I don’t know that’s true.
Yeah, Dave, we did not try to launder that towel.
We also did not just put that towel in the trash. We hired a HazMat crew.
Jiminy Effing Christmas … this is the kind of “science” that makes me want to choke a bitch: http://www.latimes.com/health/la-he-autism-20101217,0,2040535.story
Hey Michael, did I tell you about the coffee machine faux pas couple months ago?
I probably didn’t. “Nutty” is a funny flavor, isn’t it?
Andy – I have autistic nieces that live nowhere near a freeway or interstate!
This is the kind of bullshit “science” you get when the shenanigans that gave us AGW become accepted practice.
Comment by LC Aggie Sith on December 16, 2010 8:12 pm
Has everyone received their SS gifts already??
Now that you’ve mentioned it………….no.
And I’m leavin’ town tomorrow to go see my eldest grajumawate from kollej.
And shit.
And then I’ma get on a boat and tour some of the nearby thirdworld shitholes. Jamaica, Caymens. Puerto de Donkeyshow. You know the routine.
Meanwhile my hostagegift gets left on the front porch and some neighborhood meskin kid steels it and is scarred for life by what passes for humor in the mind of one of you sick fucks. Either that or I’m the new WIser and mare fucked me up the ass.
I’ll just show up with the only surviving collection of vintage Hustler magazines. You will open the hatch for me.
Will you have baby oil and old hand towels? I’m asking for a friend.
Congrats to the grad, and the dad of the grad.
If you decide you need vittles, may I recommend George’s? Home of the Big O.
PG – Congratulations! Have fun on your vacation.
MOTHERFUCKER!!!! IT’S ON LIKE DONKEY KONG!!!!
HAHAHAHA!!!! I lurv ya!
I haven’t received my SS gift, either. I’m glad I’m not the only one.
Crongrats on the college grad, PG!!!
Thanks dave.
Thanks chief.
I’m proud of her. But mostly I’m relieved to be out of the tuition and fees scam for a while.
#2 has a full ride, thank the Lord.
Congrats, PG!
Thanks, elsie ags.
I feel like I ought to buy you a drink sometime town the road.
What are your thoughts on Canadian whiskey?
What are your thoughts on Canadian whiskey?
Is it made from Canadians?
Are you going to be in these parts?? There was talk of a mini Meat-Up in the Hill Country around the 29th.
Thanks, Andy.
Are you going to be in these parts?? There was talk of a mini Meat-Up in the Hill Country around the 29th
My timing has always sucked. Middle of the gulf of meheeko.
Middle of the gulf of meheeko.
Hope you have a lot of fun!!
I intend to be a role model.
For the children.
It’s after 10 in the CST zone. I’m out.
Kick someone in the crotch for me.
Yep, time for me to go to bed, too. Y’all have a goodnight!
So….. so that’s it then?
It’s done?
okay…..
Anybody here?
Wiser – How ‘tuba practice” going? Did you make at least $10 today?
Wiserbuns!
CYN-O-MINE!
What up, lovely lady?
Hey, Cyn!
Wiser – How ‘tuba practice” going? Did you make at least $10 today?
once the check clears…. SCORE!!!
Hi Chief!
Hi Aggie!
Bye Aggie!
Is it my computer that’s taking forever to load or WordPuss?? Gah!
This whole “working” thing has to stop. I don’t get to see my sugar cynamin often enough!
Howdy Xbad!!
I actually did very little work today, which was kinda nice. The boys had their school performance today and then our office xmas lunch (I ate like a pig–stickin’ it to teh man!)
Cyn!!
How’s my favorite AZ girl?
Is it my computer that’s taking forever to load or WordPuss?? Gah!
you should try blowing into the vents. Real slow-like….
Vents in the back or on the side?
*gets down on knees*
*adjusts my vents
Thanks for sending over the rains, Xbrad. We needed them and it made it cooler here–finally! I got to wear my xmas sweater today.
Vents in the back or on the side?
Hold on… let me get my camera…..
How ’bout everyone send Wiser $10 so he doesn’t have to conduct ‘tuba practice’ under that interstate bridge the rest of the week?
*pulls hair back into a scrunchie, grabs flashlight*
How ’bout everyone send Wiser $10 so he doesn’t have to conduct ‘tuba practice’ under that interstate bridge the rest of the week?
I DON’T NEED YOUR CHARITY!!!
(make it $20 each, could ya? It’s the holidays, ya know….)
*grabs the twelve thousand klieg .. ok I’m out of metaphors
**adjusts my pants**
*powders shine off nose*
*pulls hair back into a scrunchie, grabs flashlight*
hey, you’ve done this before! I can tell!
I can swing mebbe $15. . . I’m on a fixt income.
hey, you’ve done this before! I can tell!
Yup! I love working on, um, computers!
This is the kind of bullshit “science” you get when the shenanigans that gave us AGW become accepted practice.
Seems to me that the air pollution rate has been dropping steadily for the past 20 years (particularly in LA), but the autism rate is still going up. Kind of makes the stupid freeway explanation unlikely.
*clown nose on, clown nose, ok, it’s something.
clown nose..
…
Listen?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijH9YluKG3U
Good call on the LZ, MCPO.
but the autism rate is still going up. Kind of makes the stupid freeway explanation unlikely.
I BLAME HAPPY MEALS!!!
Yup! I love working on, um, computers!
computers?
I BLAME HAPPY MEALS!!!
Ummmmmm……. gluten?
D’uh.
glad I opened the Chief’s link in another tab.
cause I am gonna listen to it all.
HEY. DESERT BABY.. .. oops. I meant, “Hi”
No. Soy. And the kajillion additives, antibiotics, and hormones injected into the food chain.
That’s where moobs come from.
Hi Beasn. You have my vote for president!`
No. Soy. And the kajillion additives, antibiotics, and hormones injected into the food chain.
I blame Mare.
Meh, I’ve gotta go back to work tomorrow and I don’t wanna.
Later constipaters.
Night Beasn! Sweet Dreams
G’nite, Beasnes!
nitey nite, bleasnpjvifsd
Cyn – All ready for the big day?
My computer isn’t moving any faster after blowing it.
Ummmmmm……. gluten?
Mmmmmmmm….gluten.
My computer isn’t moving any faster after blowing it.
Give it about half an hour…
>> My computer isn’t moving any faster after blowing it.
I was gonna say you’re doing it wrong, except I don’t like being critical.
Oh, and maybe get it a beer.
Thanks Cynamon buns!
BTW, before I go for real, anyone hear anything about Teresa’s procedure?
I still have more to do, Chief. My tree isn’t even quite finished yet. You?
My computer isn’t moving any faster after blowing it.
No. Just, no.
Yeah, the last thing Dave wants to be is critical……
Give it about half an hour…
20 minutes. . .tops.
Hello.
Cyn – Just stocking stuffers left. Braving the traffic tomorrow for that stuff.
No. Just, no.
Tee Hee
*taps fingers*
No. Just, no.
fag.
*taps fingers*
I’ve not heard anything, but I’ve been kinda sporadic here tonight.
I spent another $550 today on repairs for car #3, our 10 year old van. That’s about $2400 since August. I’m not sure I’m winning this proposition.
I’ve been gone all day so I didn’t hear anything about TiF, Beasns.
Wiser, I’m perfectly willing to accept the concept of Dminor agaist Fsharp.
It’s, interesting.
Yeah, no word on Tiff.
Cyn, what color latex hosefucking outfit did you get me for Christmas?
Jet Black
fag.
Call me names all you like. I respect my craft far too much to stoop so low as to pluck that particular fruit, sir.
*slaps wiser with white glove*
OH, JESUS, I JUST REALIZED THAT I’M LIBERACE!!!
I’ve just scanned the last two threads and nothing on TiF so far. We may not hear until tomrorw; not sure she clued in her hubby to keep us updated.
Nothing on her FB page.
*Snatches Cyn’s coconuts.*
A ‘C’, an E-flat, and a ‘G’ go into a bar.
The bartender says: “Sorry, but we don’t serve minors.”
Weird.
After only six months back in the biz, I’m being recruited by two of Houston’s better restaurants — and my old GM wants me to move to his store. Three nights of free dinner and cocktails; out of the blue.
One place was Houston’s restaurant of the year a couple of years ago.
What to do…
They are in desperate need of a good polishing!
Jet Black
You know me so well.
OH, JESUS, I JUST REALIZED THAT I’M LIBERACE!!!
Welcome to the party, pal.
Black latex never goes out of style. Never.
What to do…
Which one has the hotter waitresses?
*Stops polishing Cyn’s bewbs then realizes she might have been talking about the coconuts.*
Oops, sorry, Cyn!
Sean, I hope you can make it out here to the desert to drink with Andy and me.
**psssst, Andy, we’ll stick him with the tab!**
Too soon?
Welcome to the party, pal.
Worst. Party. EVAR!!!
Which one has the hotter waitresses?
Not the one I was at tonight.
Congrats Mesa! When you’re hot you’re hot.
Too soon?
BWAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!
That bitch about to get all up in his shizzle!
Nice work there, Shawny Two-times.
I am so getting a purse like that woman.
Not the one I was at tonight.
And what does that tell you………
Fucking WordPress.
Sean, I hope you can make it out here to the desert to drink with Andy and me.
When is this happening??
Worst. Party. EVAR!!!
Lemon Party?
I’m thinking this will be worth the price of admission. Whatca think?
http://www.thefightermovie.com/
And what does that tell you………
They’re smart.
Comment by Cyn on December 17, 2010 12:13 am
Comment by xbradtc on December 17, 2010 12:15 am
Well, that was an unfortunate coincidence right there.
Right after Christmas, Cyn. Andy was kind of vague on what night we were going hobo hunting though.
I’m thinking this will be worth the price of admission.
*yawn
Over-the-top, over-dramatic, over-acted Oscar bait.
“Must see!!!” says every single pretentious reviewer on the planet!
They’re smart.
And do we enjoy having sex with waitresses’ brains???
Well, that was an unfortunate coincidence right there.
So you’d rather it be Lemons Only? M’kay Liberace. NTTAWWT
You thinking of popping over, Cyn?
Right after Christmas
Bummer. I have a few client meets that week. Woulda been fun.
“Must see!!!” says every single pretentious reviewer on the planet!
Living here in SoCal, you can’t turn on the local news around this time of year without hearing about the Golden Globes nominations.
I have almost never heard of 3/4 of the movies.
Nighty night boys. I left some Entenmann’s donuts and milk in the kitchen and the coffee is set for tomorrow morning.
Sweet Dreams
I’s out too.
later, taters.
Wiser, no female wait staff at all.
You find that a LOT at the higher end places. It’s about service, not flirting. After a short period of time, most women find that they can make more money flirting without having to work as hard.
Not sexist, just the way it is in the industry.
If I had tits, I could make a fortune.
Who wants to buy me tits for Christmas?
Sean does.
Wiser, no female wait staff at all.
Be that as it may, you were wondering how to decide where to go…
My suggestion is to pick the place with the hottest women employees….
Mesa’s gonna wind up at Red Lobster.
Too soon?
http://i.imgur.com/i0i54.jpg
That woman was stupid for thinking a purse smack would take out the guy. Maybe she should have jumped on his back and clawed at his eyes? Or ideally, pulled a pistol out of that purse and shot him.
Question: if she shot him in the back, what are the chances of the bullet passing through him and hitting someone else?
**pokes thread with a stick**
If I had tits, I could make a fortune.
You’d have to shave at least twice a day, though.
Lips, that depends on a lot of things, like what she shot him with, and where she shot him.
OK, let’s say she shot him in the middle of his back with a .38?
Question: if she shot him in the back, what are the chances of the bullet passing through him and hitting someone else?
I know just about nothing about ballistics, but the dude was pretty hefty. I’m guessing his backfat alone would have slowed down any smaller caliber round.
Sean does.
I know.
Question: if she shot him in the back, what are the chances of the bullet passing through him and hitting someone else?
Depends a lot on the round.
Going by her purse swinging skill — she would have killed everyone in the room.
Or no one.
Going by her purse swinging skill — she would have killed everyone in the room.
Hey, you don’t go into battle with the purse swinging skill you want, you go in with the purse swinging skill you have.
Get over yourself. I already exhausted my fake tits budget on my Secret Santa gift for Cari n.
Mesa, take what gives you the bigger earning opportunity and advancement. Unless you have a better camaraderie with your old GM.
Or wait tables at a male strip joint and call yourself ‘Meat’.
Your ‘Meat’ suggestion killed the thread. That, or it inspired people to think about your suggestion.
I’m going with killed it.
You may be right. This one time.
wakey
wakey
You find that a LOT at the higher end places. It’s about service, not flirting. After a short period of time, most women find that they can make more money flirting without having to work as hard
That’s funny. One of the best bartenders I ever worked with – didn’t like me at first. I can be flirty (not terribly so, I’m just “friendly” as my husband says). I think he assumed I was one of those kind of bartenders. It totally sucks to work with someone like that, because you’ll have to bust your ass to make up for them standing around flirting.
Anyway – one night it was just him and I. (HUGE BAR). After that – he loved me.
AND, I have found men to be some of the worst. They’ll give up a whole night of tips if they think they’re gonna be able to pick up some woman. They’ll ignore the known good tippers to wait hand and food on the booby blond who ‘s gonna throw a buck one or twice.
Good morning Car in. I made the schedule in the last bar I worked in, and always paired myself with a good looking girl—one who could work as well as please the guys.
My guess is that you were a great bartender.
Mrs MJ just got the full body scan and the pat down. I wasn’t sure that was possible…
They put a finger in her waistband and ran it around. I guess suburban white chicks are a threat these days.
Purchases espresso for soldier at Starbucks. Hopefully he didn’t think I was a homo. SYWM.
Didn’t jazz agree to do the sweater puppies today? Where the fuck are they? Slacker!!
Good morning Car in. I made the schedule in the last bar I worked in, and always paired myself with a good looking girl—one who could work as well as please the guys.
Usually the best looking female bartenders are usually the worst. They’re like the staff at Hooters. They don’t need to do well to make money, and they usually can’t figure out that if they’re hot AND they bust their ass they’ll make a ton.
I worked at a place – opened it – and they hired this hot blond (Miss Cincinnati at the time) to bartend.
She sucked SO BAD. I got drinks returned all the time.
Purchases espresso for soldier at Starbucks. Hopefully he didn’t think I was a homo. SYWM.
Perhaps you shouldn’t have asked him to meet you around back later.
Agenda for today:
Clean house
Make two (or three) more batches of cookies
Pick up son’s snowboard gear (he needed new equipment, it’s too pricey to qualify for a Christmas present – we don’t really go overboard at all for gifts-so he’s got to work during Christmas break at Mr. Car In’s work to pay it off)
Prepare car for trip to Boyne tomorrow morning.
*He’s got to pay off $320. Over 40 hours. He needs this lesson to learn value. My older son gets it, but my second is a bit more fuzzy on it.
My neighbors are VERY wealthy. The boys are nice, but they have been given a lot of stuff. So, my second son has been a tad warped by this. He thinks that’s how things work.
My oldest has a bunch of friends of very modest means. His GF as well. It’s been an eye opener. Reality, kwim?
Be grateful for what you have.
People are people, no matter the size of their house.
Friends are friends for who they are, not the goodies you get to play with that they have.
Stuff like that.
I’m proud of him.
Perhaps you shouldn’t have asked him to meet you around back later.
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Asshole. I said SYWM.
$8/hr…not bad. I started working at a young age, and thought it benefited me in the long run. Understanding value, hard work, etc. Your kids seem to be very well grounded, although I’m sure they learned it from tv, not you.
I WANT MY HAPPY MEAL!
our kids seem to be very well grounded, although I’m sure they learned it from tv, not you.
I don’t think the tv should get all the credit. The lyrics of The Offspring and Blink-182 prolly had an effect as well.
Usually the best looking female bartenders are usually the worst.
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We quickly weeded these girls out. In Chicago there are plenty of hot chicks that understand flirting + good drink = better tip. Plus cute girls with ability are WAY hotter than looks alone.
Agenda for today:
Go to work for half a day. Glad hand everybody and basically mail it in. There are however two employees I’ve got to locate and get them Yo get some shit straightened out. So it won’t be a total fuck off Friday. Eat lunch. Drive seven hours to daughter’s apt. Sleep.
Sounds like you’re going to be way to busy to enjoy BBF.
Shame.
Mornin’.
Shower time. Anybody want to join me and save water?
Not so fast, MJ……..
We quickly weeded these girls out. In Chicago there are plenty of hot chicks that understand flirting + good drink = better tip. Pl
It’s also important that a bartender understands that it’s not just about them making good tips. You’ve got to keep the ENTIRE bar population happy. It’s about selling drinks. Volume.
I liked working service bar too. I was an animal. Once place I worked at had a double service bar – side by side set-ups. busy doesn’t begin to describe it.
Shower time. Anybody want to join me and save water?
Will you shave my legs?
Understanding value, hard work, etc.
I think teenagers ought to have one (just one!) crappy job, so they’ll appreciate not having to work like that all the time. Mr. RFH worked one summer in a toy store and another summer at the county stables. He said shoveling horse shit was far, far better than dealing with retail.
I can’t decide what’s worse, having a “test” in P.E. or my son getting a 73 on it.
I liked working service bar too
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That was my favorite position because of the volume. The servers were happy, and would therefore give us more than the required tip share. They make more, we make more, everyone is happy.
Heh, good to see that there are some fine bartenders around.
The place I used to work at had waitresses, who purchased drinks out of a bank to sell. We hadn’t kept track of volume per person, until the computer ordering system. We always thought that the waitress did the higher volume of selling.
Once we tracked it, we found the bartenders did 2 to 1 sales over a waitress, in addition to making all waitress drinks. Tip outs improved after this discovery.
Kudos to the true heart of a good drinking establishment!
MJ, your wife got groped because she’s pretty.
A Little Rule 5 Linkage http://tinyurl.com/28tsz7b