Look, jackholes, this is supposed to be Rosetta’s gig, but as he’s one of the only Hostages left still gainfully employed, he sloughed this off on me. Whore.
The best part of Christmas isn’t spending time with friends and family and celebrating the savior of the world and all that. It’s getting free shit in the mail.
I love getting packages (SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH) in the mail.
So here’s the deal. We’re gonna do a Secret Santa this year and you’ll participate and you’ll fucking like it. It will run smoothly, and YOU WILL NOT FUCK THIS UP. Unless you get tapped to give Wiser a gift. Then you get to fuck it all the way up its poop chute.
You: Send me an email with your nickname here, your real meatspace name, and a valid mailing address. You may wish to include you phone number as well. DEADLINE IS NOVEMBER 30TH!!!!
Me: I promise not to turn anyone in for the reward on felony warrants.
Me: I’ll put the list in a hat and have dolly pull names out to randomly match you with another Hostage. I’ll email that participant with your contact info, and they’ll send you free shit. That’s the good news. The bad news is I’ll also send you the name of some asshole who will expect you to spend NO MORE THAN $20 on them, and mail it to them.
Questions? STFU AND PUT IT IN AN EMAIL! Which, since you’re asking, is bariejr AT gmail DOT com. If you can’t figure that out, you’re too dumb to play. But any other questions, I’ll be happy to try to answer.
n00bs: You’re welcome to join in. Encouraged, even. Lurkers, guess you better delurk next year.
November 11, 2010
Categories: asshole, bacon, bbq, Boobs, Books, Booze, cat blogging, cheese, Chocolate, Don't Talk Shit About Total, Drugs, fucking genius, If You Don't Like PattyAnn, Jesus Freak, oxycontin, shut your whore mouth, STFU, Things that really matter, whiskey . Tags: bestiality, Laugh 'Till You Cry, right wing rethuglican, rush limbaugh head of GOP oxycontin, shut your whore mouth, xbrad thinks susan estridge is hot . Author: xbradtc . Comments: 328 Comments