Pinch A Loaf | Checking Your Mom's Drawers for Hope&Change since March 2009

How Can They Be This Dumb?

So…I don’t follow politics much anymore but happened to read something that popped up on my phone while I was checking stocks that I follow. Yep, if you want to look at stock performance on your phone, you’re going to be solicited for indoctrination.

Here’s the deal, as our pudding brained fake president would say, the demotards are pushing a 9/11 style commission to have a huge, multi-year review of the protest at the Capitol on Jan 6th. As I read the article I was actually a bit confused…I thought it might have been from months ago because it contained obvious factual errors, but no, it was current. We all know how this goes. The demotards say, ‘hey man just searching for the truth, can I have limitless amounts of money so spend on my friends at fancy law firms that will tell me a 2 year story with the exact timing and plot lines that will help me with reelection as far out as 2024? Just looking for the truth.’

And guess what? Thirty five moronic republicans voted with the demotards to pass the bill. Not one or two (depends how you count Liz Cheney) but 35!

So, like, how can they possibly be this dumb? How would this help them? What is to be gained? Do we really need another fat, bloated NeverTrump sissy whinging on MSNBC?

McConnell says its dead in the Senate but you never know…he can be bought with an eight ball and a waddle massage.

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May 27, 2021
Categories: #Championshiplevelboobs, #DeepanalBumpParty, BANGLAR BILLY MAYS HERE!!!!, BANGLAR BIRTHDAY!!, CHAD, cheese, Crime and Punishment, Emily, Emily's Dull Affect, Learn some shit, Leave Poland Alone, Mother's Day, motorboating the brown-ringed zero, Pinch A Loaf, playing Hide the Salmon, Shark Week, She-Meat, Sherwin Fucking Williams, Strap On Anonymous, Stroller, stupid fucking hippies, Suck It., Tube Steak Fever, tubgirl, Turkey Taint, Waddle Massage, Your Mom, your mom has a robust rumpus room . . Author: MJ (ghee/ghem) . Comments: 118 Comments

The List

Ok, so recently I was strongly encouraged to attend a struggle session at work, and it couldn’t have been more cringe. Think of that time Hotspur got caught in women’s underwear for the first time in the Macy’s dressing room. Take that, square it, add a cheese bag, and divide by the number of hot dogs Jay ate for breakfast.

Maximum cringe.

One of my favorite things that terrible public speakers all seem to do, is say that they want participation, discussion, disagreement, and debate. From there they generally talk for 20 minutes without taking a breath.

In that first 20 mins I learned a few things:

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May 6, 2021
Categories: !RALGNAB, # Hashtag, #Championshiplevelboobs, Beer, Beer Tree Farm, Citrus Ursine Weiner Beverage, Cockfacefuckaloo, Foreignotica, foreskin, Fourth Grade, FPOS, Fuck golf, H2 Eulogy, H2 Pets, H2 Wedding, Hai Karate, Hambone, Phone blogging, Pinch A Loaf, playing Hide the Salmon, Sherwin Fucking Williams, shit squirters, shitballs, Steamed Lobster, Stetson, Where's Cyn?, Where's MJ?, Where's Thor?, Your mom likes this . . Author: MJ (ghee/ghem) . Comments: 115 Comments

Down the Rabbit Hole

I always think man, the people on You-tube used to be so creative. Remember when it first started how amazing it was? Yeah…see this video? How exciting is THIS?!?!?! The first back flip on You-tube

The first video I ever sent to Merv.

I’d like to thank lauraw for introducing me to this work of art…I believe it is part of the reason Merv fell madly in love with me……….three years after I showed him the video, but really…who’s counting?

The first cat video on You-tube……and as we all know, the Internet was created for cat and dog videos…..I’m pretty sure all videos uploaded to You-tube in 2005 were filmed with a potato.

Cybergoon squad…….the very first “weird side of You-tube” video.

And last, but not least, the VERY first video uploaded to You-tube by one of the founders enjoying his time at the zoo….my guess is, this guy is probably a rich mofo.

Also, it’s entirely possible I sprained my finger picking categories. I might die. I’ll miss you all.

November 19, 2020
Categories: !RALGNAB, # Hashtag, #Championshiplevelboobs, #DeepanalBumpParty, #H2, #hashtag, #indogyears, #Problematic, #Reboob, 10/10 Would Smash, 1979 Bitchez, 2017 Big Boob Championships, 4/10 Would Still Smash, 7 / 9 fucks given, 7 of 9 fucks not given, 80s, 9/10 Dentists Would Smash, 9/11 Bush's fault, ACHOO!, alcohol, Aliens, almond, amazing post, American Hero, And Now Another Poat by Pupster, ann coulter, As Little as Possible, asshat anonymous, asshole, bacon, Bacon Strips, bacon wrapped booger, Baconwrappedboobbeer, bad trip, BADASSDOM, Badtards, Ball de Cheese, Balls, bangin' your bud, BANGLAR After Action Report!, BANGLAR BALL BUSTER, BANGLAR BILLY MAYS HERE!!!!, BANGLAR BIRTHDAY!!, BANGLAR COFFEE, BANGLAR KING KONG!!, BANGLAR!, Barack Obama, barely passable trannies, Baseball, BBF, bbq, Beanie, Beauty Personified, Beaver Button, beefcake, Beer, Beer Tree Farm, Belly Button Micro Penis, Beret, Beriberi, Big Stones, Birfday, Birthday Beat Down, birthday beating for bro-cav, Birthday Cake, Black helicopters, Blankie, Blue Man Group, BOO!!!, Boobs, Books, BOOP!, Booze, Bowel Prep, Bowler, braunschweiger, Brazil, Breitbart, Brian Williams, bro-cav is sorry he's not sorry about leering at boobs, BroCav says - 2/10 would not pick again, BroCav wants one of you lame bastigae to create a recipe category - i see nothing good coming of that - but who am i to criticize the genius of the ppl around this chat room: salt to taste, Brown Snow, brown trout - no not that kind you vile cretin, Brut, Bugout Jelly, Bunker Pants!, bushmcchimpyhitlerhalliburton, but not the good kind, butt-pokey blues, Button Nose, Buzzcut, By The Beard Of Odin!, Caffeine, CAIR, california lesbian in love, Canine, Cartman, Cash for Crunkers, cashew, cat blogging, Catnaps, cats are evul, cereal, CHAD, Chapeau, Cheedy, cheese, Cheese Ball, Cheese Log Guzzler, Cheez Wiz, chi-chi was here category, Chicks dig a nice tool, Chief Grumpybutt, Chocolate, Chubs, Cinco De Mayo, Citrus Ursine Weiner Beverage, Cockfacefuckaloo, Compound W, Conspiracy theories for $500 Alex, conspiracy theory, Consumption, cool tunes, Coonskin, coonskin cap, Corncob Pipe, cow snot, Cowboy, Crime and Punishment, crisp bills, CRUNK JUICE!!!, Cults, Dan Rather, Dan's Pickled Eggs, Dan's Pickled Nutsack, Dang. 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we don't have a Z, zero fucks, ZOMFG!!11ty!, Zzyzx . . Author: pajama momma . Comments: 241 Comments

We’re in the Matrix

I’m pretty sure we’re living in a simulation. To support this claim I want to draw your attention to the crazy that is 2020.

First, we’re witnessing white people become absolute racists in order to combat racism. I can’t only assume one of our programmers left a hashtag open and, well, here we are.

Second, a Chinese virus that was supposed to end the world – or at least come close – has turned out to be a bad flu season. I would bet all of my fake money that the code was outsourced to India and they read the requirements wrong. Covid = sys.exit() got written as: scriptcovid.2 (covid = flu. Dot not feather, always fucking up the code, amiright?

And lastly, this poor soul seems to have been built from a base character, but the game developers forgot to make the change from sausage to taco.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the weirdest thing on the internet at the moment…Danielle Muscato. Here’s a brief recap of the story if you haven’t heard about it. Basically our friend Danielle went into a Kroger and blew up at some poor soul that wasn’t wearing a face diaper. Danielle tried to get help from the store security guard and manager but they declined to prosecute this grave injustice. In response, Danielle starting harassing Kroger and the manager about their policy, and well, the blowback was swift. Look, this probably happens a few hundred times a day but for some reason this really struck a nerve with people. I have no idea why, except that perhaps Danielle is the avatar for all social justice warriors and you know, is a man.

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August 11, 2020
Categories: #Championshiplevelboobs, #DeepanalBumpParty, #H2, Beer Tree Farm, Belly Button Micro Penis, chi-chi was here category, Chicks dig a nice tool, Chief Grumpybutt, Chocolate, Fourth Grade, Fuck golf, GOOOOOOOAAAAAAALLLLLLL!!!!!, Gotta tattooed tit say number 13, Gout! Gout! Let it all out!, Hot Dog Size Clitoris, Hot-n-tot's birthday beating, How come there's no category raggin' on roamy?, Le Luc Long, Learn some shit, Leave Poland Alone, monkey love, mons of Marmota monax, Moon Pie Smash, Mother Fuckin Bootleg, mother fuckin' snakes under a mother fuckin' board, pets, Pinch A Loaf, Pure Genius, pushing the tit wheelbarrow, quesadillas, Snake juice guzzler, STFU, Stop Trying To Make TuesD'AWWW Happen, Summaries, Three card Monte, vagine, Vaseline Kiss, your mom is a fish monger, your mom likes a slippery trout, Your mom likes this, Zzyzx . . Author: MJ (ghee/ghem) . Comments: 120 Comments