Monkey Meat Madness – Tuesday Tales of the Bush

“I told my children that we cannot continue eating bush meat or any dry meat because we fear that the Ebola is very near now,”

Next thing you know people will stop having sex in the bush too….

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Colorado Alex’s Excellent Eurotrip Vacation

So I’m currently in Spain after spending the week in Baumholder, Germany.  One of the perks of the job is that we go to military bases worldwide and do on the ground data collection, including interviews with local realtors.  One of the downsides of the job is that we have to go to military bases worldwide and do on the ground data collection, including interviews with local realtors.  It’s normally cool, but sucks when the base is located in a backwater next to nothing but small towns and the locals don’t speak English.  But luckily I don’t have to do an assessment of Fort Polk this year.

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Obama II: Cockfacefuckaloo

That last word seems made up but it isn’t. If you search for it on the intertitty you’ll find a wealth of information.

So Obama is back, and this time going to kick ass and use cliches, and he’s all out of cliches. The world is stuck like a deer in the headlights of a sixteen wheel suck mobile, paralyzed at his magnificence–or so the media would have you believe.

The truth, harder than a diamond, and as difficult to swallow as a giant bitter pill is that only a few people actually care; rich old liberals and black women. The rest of us are just trying to get on with our lives. The days of our lives, even.

So please, do us a favor, oh God Emperor of the Early Release Television Series, go the fuck away. Obama could build a speech generator using the words, ‘world, future, change, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, let us, hope, and destiny,’ bridged together with terrible sentence formations and almost no one would notice. Just put up a cardboard cut out and play side A of the tape called ‘Flattering Rich Crackers’ then flip it over to side B, ‘I am Black Also, and Understand You.’

Save everyone else some time, dickface. If we wanted to be talked down to or bored to death we’d use bad grammar in a blog post and wait for Hotspur to show up.

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This man, right here, the one I’m pointing to…is a DICK!!!

Wire Walk With Me

Carla Busutil

b. 1982 Jo’burg S.A.

 

Region capture 80

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I forgot to add a title to this Father’s Day poat

Happy Father’s Day to all the Hostage Dads! Just think of all the joy and heartache and life lessons fatherhood has brought you and know that…the following people will all probably be voting multiple times each for Hillary next year:
 

 
Brought to you by Sweet Meteor of Death 2016–Because Humanity is Overrated.
 
Now, funny dad-type pictures… Continue reading