I read a post on the mothership and started laughing at a few of the pejorative names that were tossed around and it got me thinking about funny phrases and words. I know what you’re thinking…is this going to be the first in a long line of piscatorial posts or might we venture into a realm unknown?
The answer of course, is why not both? Just kidding. I think we can safely shelve our admiration for fisherman, old men, the sea, and how their bounty is turned into a delicious fried patchwork of amphibious parts. Today we embark upon a mission to call forth our favorite malicious insults.
I always think man, the people on You-tube used to be so creative. Remember when it first started how amazing it was? Yeah…see this video? How exciting is THIS?!?!?! The first back flip on You-tube
The first video I ever sent to Merv.
I’d like to thank lauraw for introducing me to this work of art…I believe it is part of the reason Merv fell madly in love with me……….three years after I showed him the video, but really…who’s counting?
The first cat video on You-tube……and as we all know, the Internet was created for cat and dog videos…..I’m pretty sure all videos uploaded to You-tube in 2005 were filmed with a potato.
Cybergoon squad…….the very first “weird side of You-tube” video.
And last, but not least, the VERY first video uploaded to You-tube by one of the founders enjoying his time at the zoo….my guess is, this guy is probably a rich mofo.
Also, it’s entirely possible I sprained my finger picking categories. I might die. I’ll miss you all.
So I’m currently in Spain after spending the week in Baumholder, Germany. One of the perks of the job is that we go to military bases worldwide and do on the ground data collection, including interviews with local realtors. One of the downsides of the job is that we have to go to military bases worldwide and do on the ground data collection, including interviews with local realtors. It’s normally cool, but sucks when the base is located in a backwater next to nothing but small towns and the locals don’t speak English. But luckily I don’t have to do an assessment of Fort Polk this year.
And historical ignorance abounds. I tried to watch the Netflix Castlevania cartoon over the weekend and made it less than 4 minutes before thumbing it down. Well-drawn, but utter garbage for writing. For those who never played the games, Castlevania was about various members of the Belmont family fighting Dracula and his offshoots and allies at various points in late Medieval and early Renaissance history. Men (white men!), faithful to God (going to church for restoration and items like holy water occurs in the early games), fighting a satanic, evil immortal being.
First scene of this shit is – in 1455 AD, we’re told – a Strong Independent Womantm marching past acres of impaled human bodies to Dracula’s castle. She bravely enters and proceeds to… scold Dracula about being such a naughty person, then ask him to teach her his super-science so she can become a doctor. A real doctor, not some cunning woman with poultices and boiling nettles. Dracula (who is basically Disney’s Beast in terms of visible menace) tells her that he likes her spirit and then agrees to do as she asks. The next scene is 1475 AD, where Lisa (aforementioned aspiring doctor) is being burned at the stake for witchcraft by a group of evil-looking priests, one of whom is a bishop. The discussion they have while she burns explicitly conflates science and witchcraft, and the bishop gives one of the priests who says he’s been studying a bit of chemistry (“just a study, to better understand our enemies”) a sidelong glance of the “you might be next at the stake” sort. I bailed. WTF? The only thing they got right was that everyone at least appeared to be European, and hey, nice shout-out with the “AD”. Let’s completely ignore that the university system (invented by the Church for the advancement of Man) has existed for almost 500 years already, and the University of Paris was founded in 1045 AD with Medicine as one of it’s 4 foundational fields of inquiry. I just want to punch a lot of retards in the face. Must be Monday.
Please post pictures of your carlos-o-lanterns, your kids candy haul, a house that you egged and tee-peed, or funny Halloween stuff.
In case you missed it…here’s the drink recipe from this week’s SES.
Zombie MJ
1 oz light rum
1 oz gold rum
1.5 oz dark rum
1/2 oz 151 proof rum
1/2 oz pineapple juice
1/2 oz papaya juice
1/2 oz fresh lime juice
Fill a pint glass almost full with ice. In a shaker, combine the light, dark, and gold rum. Add the juice, and shaky shaky. Pour over the ice, and pour the 151 proof rum over the back of a spoon to float it on the drink.
Fun garnish: Take a sprig of mint and dip it in lime juice then coat it in sugar. It should dry with the sugar adhered to the mint. Very pretty.
