MMM 285: The Agenda is Everywhere

And historical ignorance abounds.  I tried to watch the Netflix Castlevania cartoon over the weekend and made it less than 4 minutes before thumbing it down.  Well-drawn, but utter garbage for writing.  For those who never played the games, Castlevania was about various members of the Belmont family fighting Dracula and his offshoots and allies at various points in late Medieval and early Renaissance history.  Men (white men!), faithful to God (going to church for restoration and items like holy water occurs in the early games), fighting a satanic, evil immortal being.

First scene of this shit is – in 1455 AD, we’re told – a Strong Independent Woman^tm marching past acres of impaled human bodies to Dracula’s castle.  She bravely enters and proceeds to… scold Dracula about being such a naughty person, then ask him to teach her his super-science so she can become a doctor.  A real doctor, not some cunning woman with poultices and boiling nettles.  Dracula (who is basically Disney’s Beast in terms of visible menace) tells her that he likes her spirit and then agrees to do as she asks.  The next scene is 1475 AD, where Lisa (aforementioned aspiring doctor) is being burned at the stake for witchcraft by a group of evil-looking priests, one of whom is a bishop.  The discussion they have while she burns explicitly conflates science and witchcraft, and the bishop gives one of the priests who says he’s been studying a bit of chemistry (“just a study, to better understand our enemies”) a sidelong glance of the “you might be next at the stake” sort.  I bailed.  WTF?  The only thing they got right was that everyone at least appeared to be European, and hey, nice shout-out with the “AD”.  Let’s completely ignore that the university system (invented by the Church for the advancement of Man) has existed for almost 500 years already, and the University of Paris was founded in 1045 AD with Medicine as one of it’s 4 foundational fields of inquiry.  I just want to punch a lot of retards in the face.  Must be Monday.

Her outfit is falling apart, someone help!

BBF

Hello Deer Friends, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Your model is from Jolly Olde England, born January 14th, 1990, she stars with her prettier sister in some reality show or something over there.  At 30H-24-32, 5’4″ and 119lbs, please welcome Miss Billie Faiers!

19th Annual Halloween Extravaganza Post

Hello fellow H2ers. As you all know, October 29th or 30th is the day that we all set aside our differences–zumba or crossfit, fish sticks or chicken nuggets, terrible heavy metal or terrible alt-rock, test anxiety or work anxiety, grabbing pussies or manginas, flame throwers or hot pepper induced magma sharts, pickles or cheetos,– to celebrate our annual Halloween extravaganza and the ritual circumcision of a perfectly good gourd.

Please post pictures of your carlos-o-lanterns, your kids candy haul, a house that you egged and tee-peed, or funny Halloween stuff.

In case you missed it…here’s the drink recipe from this week’s SES.

Zombie MJ

1 oz light rum

1 oz gold rum

1.5 oz dark rum

1/2 oz 151 proof rum

1/2 oz pineapple juice

1/2 oz papaya juice

1/2 oz fresh lime juice

Fill a pint glass almost full with ice. In a shaker, combine the light, dark, and gold rum. Add the juice, and shaky shaky. Pour over the ice, and pour the 151 proof rum over the back of a spoon to float it on the drink.

Fun garnish: Take a sprig of mint and dip it in lime juice then coat it in sugar. It should dry with the sugar adhered to the mint. Very pretty.

Happy Halloween, babies. 

MJ:

 

Big Boob Friday

Good morning boys and girls. I’ll confess that I went to bed last night having completely forgotten about this, but as I drifted off in to sweet dreams I was suddenly jerked awake with the thought that I had agreed to do this week’s BBF. So this BBF is thrown together at the last minute, but really isn’t that the standard with this place? You don’t get the BBF you want, but perhaps the BBF you need, and even deserve.

MMM 205: Making America Great Again in 2016

So the year begins and HOLY CRAP I’m excited.  It’s going to be amazing.  2016 is bound to be better than 2015.  Here’s my reasoning:

You know all those things that can’t go on forever?  Remember how things that can’t go on forever… don’t?  Every single one of those things is now closer to ending.  SOMETHING is going to fail catastrophically this year, and gravity will bring something with no business in the air crashing to the ground.  Keep the popcorn handy.  If it’s the EBT system, oh man, hilarity will surely ensue.  Another market crash?  WOOOOO!  The only thing better would be an actual zombie apocalypse.

ARE YOU PUMPED?

Lat work.

MMM 199: Alex’s Yoga Class

Happy Thanksgiving week, everyone. I’m working 2.5 days this week. It’d be 3 but the wife has some bidness to transact on base and I’ll be staying home with the baby so she doesn’t have to truck the poor lass out to Mt. Clemens and back.

In this post we’re going to peer into the future and have a look at all the things Alex might see when he joins a yoga class for the only reasons any straight man joins a yoga class.

The ab wheel isn’t really a yoga thing, but you still might see it.

Far Side of the Moon vs Bizarro Mondo