Tour de Pants

The Tour of France by bicycle lasts most of the month of July. This year I think I read 2 articles about it. One was how the 2 guys who cover the race on TV are brilliant and the other one a couple of days ago discussing how the rider from the winning team is part of a system that has made the race boring by their success. Despite reading both of these articles (skimming is more like it) I cannot tell you who actually won the race. tour-de-france-main-crash

Crashes in bike races, especially road bikes, is part of the fun of watching. Sort of like NASCAR. Fast cars driving around an oval shaped track for hours on end. When they show the highlights, what do they show other than the winner drinking milk and the crashes? That’s right.

The Tour de France is one of those elitist sports that people who don’t watch the debased American sports like football and soccer claim to watch. Sort of like being a vegan…you’ll know if someone follows the tour within 5 minutes of meeting them. World cup soccer, international tennis, cricket, the list goes on and on. All of these things are fine, including being a vegan if you want to do that (dog whistle to Leon), I just don’t want to hear about how they’re superior to traditional American sports!

Continue reading

Baby Watch

T-minus three months until total loss of sleep, life, and mind. I’m counting on all of you hostage aunts, uncles, and somewhere in between, to keep me honest and give me tons of advice on how to raise a baby. Every new parent loves to hear about what they’re doing wrong and how its going to permanently scar their child!

Continue reading

BBF

Hello spelunkers and drink-mixers, welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Our model for today was born December 27th, 1989 in Wordsley, Dudley, West Midlands, England.  5’5“, 34E-25-37 and 105 lbs, please express yourself artistically  and say hello to Miss Caitlin Wynters!

Continue reading

Coming to Get You

Awwww, yeah.

So excited to see Hostage and IB buddies. SOON.

The rest of this shitty post will consist of pleasant pictures. Because it’s gentle on the brain, and that is what we all need on Tuesday.

p1

 

p2

 

p3

 

p4

p7

 

p5

 

p6

p8

That last pic came up randomly in the search for ‘plasant picture.’ I swear.

BBF

Hello milk drinkers and tiara wearers, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

 

 

Your model for today was born October 24th, 1993 in Stillwater, Minnesota, Canada.  She measures 5’9″, 35-24-35.  Please stop lamenting long enough to welcome, Miss Alex Hanson!

Continue reading

BBF

Hello organ grinders and mud slingers, welcome to Big Boob Friday

 

 

You model for today got her start when she was a student at Arizona, with a youtube channel of her hiding different things in her bra.  That action progressed to naked tumblr, naturally.  Born in California on January 30th, 1989.  Standing 5′ 3″ with a set of 34H’s, please put it back and welcome, Miss Winter Pierzina!

Continue reading

BB&BF

Hello friends, and welcome to Big Boobs and Butt Friday.

 

 

Your subject for today was born in Kaliningrad, Russia on August 3rd, 1995.  She measures 5’9″, 37E-25-41(!).  Please stop oppressing short legged doggies and welcome, Miss Anastasiya Kvitko!

Continue reading

BBF

Hello fellow humans, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.

*

*

Your model for today was born in St. Petersburg, Russia on April 7th, 1992.  She stands 5’9″, and measures 35D-25-34 and 115lbs.  Please stop counter-protesting long enough to welcome, Miss Helga Lovekaty!

Continue reading