Nothing Meme Matters

Car in got a new concert coat

149 Comments

  1. That wasn’t his elbow Patty.

  2. Puntastic

    (Which autocorrect wants to be punt stick. Which reminds me of that taunt in vogue a few years back of “cunt punt”).

  3. Good morning, my fellow oppressors. Go out and make someone’s life miserable today while you still can.

  4. Anyone using Venmo here? I had heard about it and finally got an account to be paid back for a loan for a vehicle. I fronted the money for Ben’s Jeep and he is paying me back $400/month, interest free because I’m a stand up guy. The mechanics of going to the bank and withdrawing $400 every month wasn’t working because Ben is a Millennial. Enter the electronic payment system! I’ve got $800 sitting in my Venmo account and I honestly don’t know what comes next. It’s linked to my bank account and I think a transfer of funds is allowed after a certain amount of time without a fee. There’s a way to buy Bitcoin through the app but I really don’t know how the finance charge compare with other means of purchasing Bitcoin.

  5. I can’t believe that Charlene (she / her) hasn’t responded to my third inquiry about setting up an employee resource group centered around diversity of opinion. She was really supportive until I told her it would be a safe space for those who feel they can’t express their opinion.

    It’s almost as if they’re not interested in diversity at all.

    I am shocked.

  6. We venmo the babysitters and basically that’s how we sell shit.

    It works.

  7. Massachusetts is activating the Army National Guard to, get this, drive kids to school. Apparently there aren’t enough drivers for the buses. They’re short at least a couple of hundred drivers if I read the article correctly, so the problem isn’t going to disappear overnight.

  8. national guard drivers? that won’t end well

  9. there’s a big q on a box in the trump pic

  10. It will get worse.

    On the plus side, now’s the perfect time to start rolling out Booz as a currency for the blossoming gray market economy.

  11. I saw the Q, Jay. Q is bullshit, but trolling with it is sweet.

  12. wakey wakey

  13. Decided to make homemade ‘perpetual’ vanilla extracts for Christmas presents this year. I ordered the beans, now I have to figure out where to get bottles. Think I’ll go with half-pints or pints.

  14. Hmmm I suppose I could just buy flask-size booze bottles and put the vanilla right in the booze and wash the labels off and relabel. More expensive that way though.

  15. That sounds fun, Lumpy. Closest I got was making black raspberry infused vodka.

  16. Should be able to buy small glass bottles through a supplier. The essential oils people at farmer’s markets do that.

  17. Yeah? How did that turn out? I always meant to try Rosetta’s cucumber-booze infusion but never did.

  18. Decided to make homemade ‘perpetual’ vanilla extracts for Christmas presents this year. I ordered the beans, now I have to figure out where to get bottles. Think I’ll go with half-pints or pints.
    ————————
    Awesome idea. How does one go about doing that?

  19. Hmmm I suppose I could just buy flask-size booze bottles and put the vanilla right in the booze and wash the labels off and relabel. More expensive that way though.
    —————-
    I filled small mason jars with vodka and put in vanilla beans a few years back.

    Turned out awesome. The color turned sort of amber and you can smell the vanilla a mile away when the jar is opened.

  20. CA recall…60/40 no on recalling Gov Slickhair.

    The result will be more about rubbing everyone’s face in it.

    Why not go big and laugh and laugh and laugh at the conservatidiots who thought CA might go quietly into that good night?

  21. Perpetual vanilla: You just use several times more beans per amount of vodka or rum, and instruct the recipient to keep filling the flask with more booze as it gets used up. Lasts years and years. I’m looking for 8 ounce bottles with a sturdy cap. I like these but they’re spendy:

    https://www.specialtybottle.com/glass-bottles/swing-top/8-5oz-flask-flsk8st

    I could also make rosemary oil, which I have done successfully for myself and it’s freaking delicious on everything as a last touch.

  22. I want that Celine Dion jacket.

  23. Great ideas for xmas gifts.

  24. vanilla beans are more expensive than giving gold

  25. check goodwill stores for some interesting bottles, or antique shops

  26. Black-raspberry vodka was amazing. The berries really mellowed out the alcohol, very pleasant on some ice with a little soda for bubbles and a good nose off the glass.

  27. i could use a couple of those bottles. Hot sauce for one!

  28. The actual sauce bottles on that site are only like a buck apiece, Jay.

  29. i need a nice bbq rub shaker bottle with a nice top. mason jar with a decorative lid works, kind of.

  30. $2.50 each, but they are filled with beer

    https://tinyurl.com/c5utjr4y

  31. got a couple cases of those, in various colors. great for homebrew, don’t have to cap them

  32. I sort of love AOC wearing a tax the rich dress to a $35K per person event.

    Her PR people are unbelievably good. Dems will love it, Repubs will hate it and she’ll get a ton of attention.

    It would be like Trump showing up to every interview with coterie of illegal aliens as ’employees.’

  33. I think Trump should hire a small team of sassy black ladies to follow every statement he makes with “that’s right!” and “mmm-HMM!” and exaggerated head movements.

  34. AOC has a good PR team. Almost like a production company for an actress, huh?

  35. https://amac.us/startup-will-provide-conservative-alternatives-to-woke-corporations/

    Scoping this out for Christmas present ideas.

  36. AOC has a good PR team. Almost like a production company for an actress, huh?
    ———————————
    Yeah, except their actress is a true believer. A religious fanatic.

    She’s the perfect millennial in our plastic world.

    And her teeth look better. The Invisalign seems to be working.

  37. I keep saying that Trump understood the importance of political theater in theater in way that the right rarely does. It’s why they don’t know how to deal with AOC and others. They continue to think that somehow they can win on arguments, when very often the masses won’t give them a second look, let alone consider any argument, because they’ve already been written off as uncool.

  38. Lumps, Fillmore Container has some decent prices on syrup and sauce bottles, and they sell from one to a thousand units at a time.

    They have good selection and do good customer service. I buy lids from them

  39. canning lids? I was looking for a place that isn’t amazon to get lids from

  40. heh, they are double the amazon price

  41. At this point I’m willing to pay more to not have to buy through Amazon.

  42. Roamie, sorry it’s come to this for you. But I like how you’re handling it.

    It sends a very subtle, but forceful message.

  43. I started this company almost thirty eight years ago. Almost everything in my office is a personal belonging, except the shit that’s on my desk top.

    It’s going to be hard to pack this place up when the time comes.

  44. I keep saying that Trump understood the importance of political theater in theater in way that the right rarely does. It’s why they don’t know how to deal with AOC and others. They continue to think that somehow they can win on arguments, when very often the masses won’t give them a second look, let alone consider any argument, because they’ve already been written off as uncool.
    —————
    Yeah, agreed. No one sees or cares about thy hypocrisy of Nancy Pelosi standing in front of a 10K fridge stocked with thousands of dollars of boutique ice cream. No one cares that Obama had a party with 600 celebrities, unmasked.

    It just doesn’t resonate with the left. They care about winning and punishing people. Feeling superior or intelligent.

    You’ll never get a response talking about Obama’s mansions. You will get a response if you call him average and his voters dopes.

  45. People want to be part of the stronger tribe; it’s a survival instinct. This is especially true for women. “Facts don’t care about your feelings” has it exactly backwards: feelings don’t care about your facts. People will use logic to justify their alignment with one tribe or the other, rather than use logic to try and figure out that alignment.

    I like to say that the GOP establishment often acts like the fat kid sitting home alone on prom night, confident that the girl he’s pined over for years will eventually see what a douchebag Chad the quarterback really is, and what a great catch he is. Meanwhile, Mary Jane Rottencrotch is busy getting reamed by Chad in the back-room of a house party, and he’s wondering if he can convince her to try anal.

  46. Don’t do it, Chad. Anal’s not worth the risks or the pleading.

  47. Chad loves anal – especially when he’s getting it from Biff.

  48. What if its the other way around? What if Mary Jane wants to try anal?

    Will Chad go along with it?

  49. If it’s your wife after a few years, okay try it.

    If it’s a gal on date <=4? She's not "trying it" with you.

  50. You had me at “Beiber getting choked”. Anything more is too much winning.

  51. Your mom wanted to try it.

  52. “try”

    That’s like me trying Bulleit whiskey.

  53. There is no try, only do.

  54. Buncha try-hards around here.

  55. These Fish Sticks are Hard as Tits
    ———–
    Best name evah

  56. Biff tried, but he wasn’t hard.

  57. Best sock puppet evah

  58. MJ, the only way Newsom isn’t recalled is through cheating.

    So, yeah, no recall.

  59. Exactly.

    There will be open, obvious cheating. It’s part of the kink.

    I really hope I’m wrong.

  60. If Newsome were smart he’d accuse Larry Elder of cheating and laugh his ass off.

    Democrat panties would get moist.

  61. in 2021, 48% of hospitalizations for covid were for another issue, or a mild case. per steve deace

  62. Trump darn near outperformed the cheat factor, let’s hope Elder upped his game.

  63. its The Atlantic, for fock’s sake

  64. GND had this conversation this morning. She basically accused me of bias for data I like. She’s right in most cases but we talked through my 50% rule.

    Let’s say 50% of covid deaths aren’t really related to covid. It’s still a bit number.

    Now let’s say that the 12000 clot shot deaths are around 6K.

    Do we accept both?

    In both cases the death factor for me personally is basically zero. But I’d be super pissed if I got the shot and dropped dead – for no reason.

    I’d be super pissed if I got covid and died too.

    So here we are. 0 is not greater than 0. Not is it less.

  65. Big and nor. FFS

  66. Don’t argue with GND. She holds the keys.

  67. i seek out alternative data

  68. Ace has a post up about some dickface asshole that beat some chick in MMA.

    There is a really easy way to fix this problem.

    Every time one of these fags tries to pull this transgender shit, a much more skillful dude declares the same thing and challenges the fag to a match. Every fucking time. If you declare you are a chick and try to fight, some dude who is better than you will do the same and kick your ass into oblivion.

    I think that would put a stop to it right quick.

  69. Did I give you guys a weekend wrap up from Chicago?

    Arrived Thursday night – had a WONDERFUL meal at some hippy dippy place in Kalamazoo (on the way) – One Well Brewing. Just really lucked out and randomly tried it. Two thumbs way up. Then back on the road.

    Got in sorta late, went to bed. In the morning, I got a run in before the graduation started – which I had to watch in the hotel lobby because I wasn’t vaccinated. The whole state is mask crazy again, but the hotel was MAYBE 30% so I never wore one. Picked ethan up around noon – he needed a liberty buddy (which was the Future Mr. Erin) so we got to meet him. He spend the day with his family, and we just spend the day farting around. Eating food, chilling. He didn’t want to spend any time in a car, so no Chicago visits. Dropped him off at 8pm, so he could get back to his “ship” in time.

    Saturday, we spend the entire day with Mr. Erin. very nice young man. Erin and he got to know each other better. We went out to lunch, then did this and that. Fancy dinner. Then Erin and Ethan’s girlfriend drove the boys back to the barracks. Sunday the girls saw the boys out of the barracks, and then we took Ethan to breakfast and headed home. His girlfriend stayed there all Sunday, Erin came home with us.

    Stopped at a great place in Michigan City for Lunch – Fish Camp. Right on the water, by a marina. Highly recommend if anyone is ever by there.

    Erin has been tight lipped with me about the future Mr. Erin, but that’s pretty normal. Zero hanky panky ( I think there was a parting hug) but apparently the guy was … pretty nervous. Ethan said he’d never seen him like that since he’s usually brimming with confidence. BIG improvement over past suitors. He was pretty obvious in expressing his interest w/o being agressive in any way. Two thumbs WAY up.

    They (ethan and Mr Erin are going to the next school together and plan on sharing an apartment) are either heading to California friday or in 13 days. Who knows? Ethan’s just happy he’s got his phone back and has the freedom to work out again. Erin has been on her phone a LOT. Hopefully she’s not being too sassy to the young man.

    Listened to Biden’s speech on the way to chicago , and I was … well, you know. Watched the memorial stuff on Saturday until I saw the assholes all lined up in the front. Then turned it off and remembered 9/11 in my own way – 2050 steps on a machine). It was an estimate, as I’ve seen different numbers.

  70. OH WAIT .. $20.

  71. That’s a good idea Hotspur.

  72. Mr Erin, that’s hilarious

    congrats, grandma (in 9 months)

  73. the covid narrative is destroyed by the anecdotal stories. “My 33 year old fitness loving husband got Covid and died”. These stories get amplified by the media because its the narrative they like. Meanwhile, every year – perfectly healthy people die of the flu just because that sometimes happens. Statistically, it’s not even a particle of dust,but with the media – it suddenly becomes everyone knows someone who died similarly. When in reality, it wasn’t the case – that 40 y/o was 48 and he had uncontrolled diabetes but we’re just going to gloss over that detail.

    In reality, the majority of covid deaths – certainly when you figure in the % of the population the represent – are the elderly. The very elderly. But, you know, they’re lying to us for a good reason so it’s all ok.

  74. wonder how much a special forces soldier would lose in 12 years of hormone therapy.

  75. And if he’s a runner let’s say, three better runners declare they are shes, enter the race, beat the shit out of the queer, and graciously hand their medals to the women who came in 5th, 6th, and 7th.

    That way the fag is never even able to earn a medal.

    Why is this so fucking hard to figure out for these athletes?

  76. He likes dogs – has a rescue dog. He was all AP/college course in high school and is a college grad (don’t know exact degree), has a license for teaching special ed and has been doing that for 5 years. He must have taught while in college. 22. Likes rock climbing and erin.


  77. Did I give you guys a weekend wrap up from Chicago?

    Arrived Thursday night – had a WONDERFUL meal at some hippy dippy place in Kalamazoo (on the way) – One Well Brewing. Just really lucked out and randomly tried it. Two thumbs way up. Then back on the road.

    Got in sorta late, went to bed. In the morning, I got a run in before the graduation started – which I had to watch in the hotel lobby because I wasn’t vaccinated. The whole state is mask crazy again, but the hotel was MAYBE 30% so I never wore one. Picked ethan up around noon – he needed a liberty buddy (which was the Future Mr. Erin) so we got to meet him. He spend the day with his family, and we just spend the day farting around. Eating food, chilling. He didn’t want to spend any time in a car, so no Chicago visits. Dropped him off at 8pm, so he could get back to his “ship” in time.

    Saturday, we spend the entire day with Mr. Erin. very nice young man. Erin and he got to know each other better. We went out to lunch, then did this and that. Fancy dinner. Then Erin and Ethan’s girlfriend drove the boys back to the barracks. Sunday the girls saw the boys out of the barracks, and then we took Ethan to breakfast and headed home. His girlfriend stayed there all Sunday, Erin came home with us.

    Stopped at a great place in Michigan City for Lunch – Fish Camp. Right on the water, by a marina. Highly recommend if anyone is ever by there.
    Erin has been tight lipped with me about the future Mr. Erin, but that’s pretty normal. Zero hanky panky ( I think there was a parting hug) but apparently the guy was … pretty nervous. Ethan said he’d never seen him like that since he’s usually brimming with confidence. BIG improvement over past suitors. He was pretty obvious in expressing his interest w/o being agressive in any way. Two thumbs WAY up.

    They (ethan and Mr Erin are going to the next school together and plan on sharing an apartment) are either heading to California friday or in 13 days. Who knows? Ethan’s just happy he’s got his phone back and has the freedom to work out again. Erin has been on her phone a LOT. Hopefully she’s not being too sassy to the young man.

    Listened to Biden’s speech on the way to chicago , and I was … well, you know. Watched the memorial stuff on Saturday until I saw the assholes all lined up in the front. Then turned it off and remembered 9/11 in my own way – 2050 steps on a machine). It was an estimate, as I’ve seen different numbers.

    Which Mass did you attend Sunday?

  78. I think the optics of two transgenders competing, cutting out actual women completely, may get some more dense-heads to understand the fucking point.

  79. I’ll attend mass again when my pope isn’t a commie.

  80. Well said.

  81. Were the guys in dress blues, or dress whites? Because dress blues are kick-ass.

  82. I’ve come to believe its a fad.

    There have always been trans people and a subculture to go along with it but not like this. Tons of young girls deciding they are dudes.

    That’ll end when the attention on it ends.

  83. Dress whites for graduation. I wish I could have seen him in his blues. Saturday and sunday they had to wear their service uniform ( I think that’s the name)

  84. His pictures were done in his blues, so I can’t wait until they get here.

  85. Wait, they’re still the Cracker Jack style right? (Not that faggy shit the chiefs and officers wear.)

  86. I am cooking bacon sprinkled with rosemary and fresh cracked pepper in my oven. Mmmm.

  87. The white? Yes.

  88. Hopes and prayers that Erin and Mr Erin can make this work.

  89. If nothing more, I hope it shows her that there are stand-up guys out there, and she doesn’t have to resign herself to a bunch of self obsessed dead end losers.

    You just can’t find the stand-up guys where most young people hang out.

  90. bad news for the men of lapeer, they just don’t measure up

  91. Don’t worry, there are always waitresses for Sean’s Penis.

  92. There are men of Lapeer who measure up. It’s just that those who do, leave.

  93. NY judge just issued an injunction on clot shot mandate for NYS health care workers.

  94. must be going in for surgery, and didn’t want to die

  95. Stand up guys in lapeer leave, find live elsewhere, then move back home. Lots of people worth knowing in lapeer are either taken, off in college new job, or working their ass off and too busy.

  96. Maybe the real threat to norms were the things we were willing to do along the way to get rid of Trump.

  97. Jam, what part of NYS are you in?

  98. I did that to Niles.

  99. Norm McDonald passed away at 61, cancer.

  100. Oh no. RIP Norm.

  101. Southern tier.

  102. 5 hours to dc by car.

  103. So, it turns out Milley is a downright shitstain.

    May he fucking rot in hell. He better pray the democrats stay in power forever.

  104. But how far is it by Moped?

  105. bob woodward raises his head again, getting milley to say it.

  106. Typing and deleting. Shit getting me down today.

  107. Meanwhile, my brain wants to rewrite “Men of Harlech” as “Men of Lapeer”. Thanks, jackholes.

  108. It sounds like next season of Lapeer Creek is going to jump the shark.

  109. “You never know what a president’s trigger point is,” Milley told his senior staff, according to the book.

    That makes his senior staff complicit. I hope the army takes appropriate action.

  110. I dunno. A H2 meetup/wedding mashup could be fine.

  111. To be fair to one who certainly doesn’t deserve it, it is Bob Woodward saying this.

  112. We could have the ceremony under the beer trees.

  113. We’ll end up pulling guard duty to keep the stream of distraught young men from crashing the ceremony. Forget “Say Anything,” we’ll have guys lining up to pound on the Church door and scream, “Erin! Stop! I object!”

  114. Yeah, yeah, I get it, Dude. *readies cattle prod*

  115. I’ll make sure I’ve got propane, CO2, and gas.

  116. church? we don’t need no commie church

  117. The purported pope is not the church. I wonder if I’ll live long enough to see that finally resolved and the Vatican 2 controversies put to rest. Imperfect men are still capable of acting In Persona Christi (which is good, since all of them are) assuming valid ordination.

    Fr James Martin tapdances regularly on the edge of heresy, but any sacraments received from him are valid unless his bishop defrocks him.

  118. Several high level officials at Milley’s meeting ready to testify

    Yeah, for immunity. Testify, then court martial them too. They were complicit, because they took part.

  119. It would appear they’ve found their scapegoat for Biden’s debacle, then.

  120. Norm was one of my favorites. Holy crap he was funny. So sad.

  121. Jam, I may reach out some time if I’m heading that general direction. Would love to meet some more morons.

    My assignment may involve some travel closer to others here, so maybe I’ll get to meet more hostages.

  122. If I do meet any of you, assume I’m wearing a wire.

  123. Am I the only one who hates the phrase “save the date”? It’s overused and trite. And yet I have to use it for work repeatedly every year. Swear to God I want to nail whoever first put that phrase out there to a flaming rusty concertina wire covered electrified piece of sheet metal.

  124. Calm down Tim.

  125. I was wondering whose porch to drop the flaming bag of poo on, on Halloween. Jay clinched it with the Travolta groaner!

  126. https://is.gd/xCC6pf

    (Imgur video with sound)

  127. I filed a $2400 claim with the USPS for a lost package.

    It took 3 months, and I probably spent over 6 hours on the phone, but they are actually going to pay me.

  128. Even Steven.

  129. you people have 0 appreciation for quality word play

  130. Tim’s anger with that phrase reminds me of the time a co-worker, totally out of the blue, told me that pumpernickel is one of the few breads that make him angry.

    I responded I was glad it was only a few.

  131. NO WIRES AT THE MEETUP/WEDDING.

  132. Anyone you suspect of wearing a wire, blast em in the chest with a super soaker.

  133. Your mom probably wasn’t wearing a wire but you can never be too sure.

  134. Croc, let us know when you’re passing through Southern New England, there’s a certain lumpy personage and her hubby that would fix you some lunch or meet you somewhere for a fist bump.

  135. If we smoke some clams, don’t inhale.

  136. https://www.cleveland.com/akron/2021/09/hudson-mayor-craig-shubert-parents-call-for-resignation-of-hudson-school-board-teachers-after-students-receive-book-of-inappropriate-writing-prompts.html

    Monica Havens, the mother of a high school senior who received the “642 Things to Write About” book, previously worked as a teacher for 11 years, shared some of the prompts from the book at the board meeting, among them:

    “Choose how you will die.
    Write a scene that begins: ‘It was the first time I killed a man.’
    Describe your favorite part of a man’s body using only verbs.
    You have a dream that you’ve murdered someone. Who is it, how and why did the murder happen, and what happens afterward?
    You are a serial killer. What TV shows are on your DVR list? Why?
    The kill fee.
    Write a sex scene you wouldn’t show your mom.
    Rewrite the sex scene from above into one that you’d let your mom read.
    You have just been caught in bed by a jealous spouse. How will you talk your way out of this?
    Write a sermon for a beloved preacher who has been caught in a sex scandal.
    Describe a time when you wanted to orgasm but couldn’t.
    Ten euphemisms for sex.
    You are a brand-new suicide-hotline counselor. Describe how you feel during the course of your first call.
    Write a letter from the point of view of a drug addict.
    Drink a beer. Write about the taste.
    Write an X-rated Disney scenario.
    A roomful of people who want to sleep together.
    The first time you had sex.”

  137. I understand how some people believe popular culture is being advanced into ever more degradation by a force of colonizing demons.

    I get it.

  138. X-Files was allegory.

  139. Milley should be in Leavenworth. Anyone above Lt. Col in the officer class should be considered suspect and not to be trusted. There is a reason why, when you read about coups in the banana Republic and 9 times out of ten its “Colonel” so and so. Rarely is it “General” so and so because all the Generals are already getting paid and have power.

    It is my fervent wish that this Milley guy gets everything he deserves

  140. it’s possible he’s being set up. we know he was speaking with Pelosi, but out and out treason?

    Yeah, I think he did. Now prove it and get him out, along with any chance for a cushy consulting job.

  141. I hour 9 mins until we find out how bad dems cheated to beat Elder, and if they were successful

  142. CoLex, one of those writing prompts, about euphemisms for sex, was already covered exhaustively in the best IB thread ever.

  143. If I get anywhere close to Lumps and Scott’s state, I will make a detour.

  144. State of confusion ?

    State of intoxication?

  145. Not mutually exclusive, Pepe.

  146. Every one of those officers that agreed to Milleys ‘deal’, had the duty to go to the SecDef and the President and tell them a coup was under way. None of them did. They should all hang, or be put up against the wall.
    No excuses for that shit…

  147. Don embezzled Rachel’s proceeds.


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