Meme No More

My new favorite Molly Hatchet tune. Stay for the totally awesome guitar solo. Even Car in will like it.

Mare!

Follow me for more recipes!

And the pun!

pun-S-

126 Comments

  1. Good morning everyone!

    Florida just got issued a shelter-in-place order. I see where this is going:

    https://tinyurl.com/yx7mxfvz

  2. “Well, just do as many as you can” is my favorite

    Thanks Jay

  3. Jay likes to slip in some puns…something, something your mom.

  4. Gretchen just shut our state down until June 1st. Two and a half months.

    GRETCHEN FOR VP. I’m on this train now.

  5. I was wrong. JUNE 16th. Three months.

  6. It’s really for your own good

  7. It makes me wonder if we’ll have a wave of Dem governors shutting things down for a ridiculous amount of time and then blaming Trump for every vaguely related death in their state when he countermands their absurd decrees

  8. Yes.

  9. Let’s list the fun things that are going to happen:

    People will lose their homes

    People will lose Their health insurance

    Business will go under, so no job when this is over

    Undiagnosed conditions will fester for some, and advance to dangerous levels

  10. 3 fucking months is outrageous. Its grandstanding and setting up to beg for a bailout. This woman must be stopped.

  11. Well, that other governor pushed it to June 1, so she had to outdo him.

    NOTICE ME JOE. I CARE.

  12. She is so fucking stupid:

    AOC is currently on Instagram live encouraging people to refuse to pay their rent and engage in organized rent strikes. She then went on a rant about how capitalism is to blame for people making money off of owning property.

  13. https://tinyurl.com/I-give-this-poat-one-of-these

    You know who doesn’t know social distancing? Puppies. No social distancing.

    WHY DO THEY LIKE BEING SO CLOSE?

  14. Well, if your governor doesn’t shut everything down, you can listen to all the nattering naybodies complain about no one confining them to their room.

  15. AOC needs a painful encounter with a clue-by-four. Common ownership of property isn’t practiced by literal Stone Age tribes in the Amazon. It takes a very high level of sophisticated sophistry to even suggest bullshit like that.

  16. No Trump rallies in a must-win state before the middle of June.

    Pure coincidence.

  17. Heh, Trump doesn’t need rallies. We’re all ignoring the media anyway, and the phone.

  18. This is fucking nuts. Everything. This has nothing to do with a mildly annoying virus and everything to do with politics.

    Using science and data prove me wrong. That this virus is worse than other other making it necessary to fucking crush the greatest economy in the world.

  19. Lawn tractor had a flat when I checked it a few days ago, likely from bumping one of the farm implements idiots left to be grown into trees over the years.

    Just bought the “protection plan” for it, so I might go make a claim. I imagine John Deere is “essential”, at least in springtime.

  20. I try to understand the point of sheltering in place for coronavirus, but the evidence just doesn’t point to that being a solution. Yes, it’s a horrible strain of a flu-like disease, and it’s got a higher mortality rate. But it’s not Ebola high.

    People with conditions have a higher risk, I get it. But what are we supposed to do about that, other than not visiting them, contacting them, etc. If it was my family member, I’d work harder to help them, same with a neighbor. But that guy across town? I can’t help him.

    Medical people, please point out the error of my thoughts. So far I haven’t heard that, which tells me my thinking is on.

    EDIT: I have heard from certain medical friends, but that’s been political bullshit. Not properly prepared (don’t see that), downplaying a hoax (proven bullshit), etc. I’m talking about actual evidence. Yes, we can halt things, but the cost is our society. We have to make a living, and we have to support the other things that have to happen. Yes, medical people, your viewpoint has value. But so does the viewpoint of the business people. We both live in the world.

  21. At some point, we have to go back to normal activity. Have to. We’ll get a spike in infections, maybe, and maybe a few extra deaths. Tragic, I get that, but we either endure this as a culture and species or we don’t. We can’t stay in our houses watching YouTube forever.

  22. Exactly leon. Flatten the curve = lengthen the outbreak, but with less of a spike. It’s gonna last longer.

    It doesn’t mean we aren’t going to get it. THATS NOT THE POINT OF FLATTEN THE CURVE!

  23. 1) I’m shaving this head before June 9th or whenever Gretchen says we can live again.

    2) agree totally J’ames. No government can guarantee you save from a FUCKING VIRUS. This isn’t ebola. Contrary to the behavior of people.

    3) flattening the curve means NOTHING because unless we’re preparing for the spike once we’re allowed out again, we’re just kicking the can down the road.

  24. I hate every effing politician in this Country. Worthless, money grabbing, attention whore, lefties.

  25. Remember what I said yesterday that my fear was that the left now knows we’ll fall in like sheep and that they’ll use that power to eff us (conservatives)?

    This is exactly what’s happening in VA and MI.

  26. I already had it, I’m sure of it. Give me a test and then a “living like a human” permit and then leave me the hell alone.

  27. Going to guess 4 out of 5 of these fuckers don’t know what “flatten the curve” is supposed to mean and just use it as a buzzword.

    The fifth knows but realizes almost nobody else does and uses it as cover for their fuckery.

  28. Full employment was bad for them.

  29. Things that make you go HMMMM

  30. I used that metaphor on the phone yesterday.

    “We stopped the heart to fight a pathogen that needs a beating heart. The patient may not revive when we try to restart it, no matter how much ‘juice’ we apply.”

  31. The economic destruction really can’t be measured right now but the first signals are really troubling.

    2020 is over.

  32. Awwwwww, now I see, they are pushing the “mail in vote.” Because it’s “the safest way!” Guess who? That fat bitch who lost, from Georgia, Stacy Abrams.

    Uh huh, yes, that can’t be manipulated. Nope, not at all.

    EFF YOU LEFTIES.

  33. These assholes never let a crisis go to waste.

    Always, always, always scheming.

    They are scum. Real scum.

  34. I waited to long to buy my panic rifle. Boo!

    BTW I’m totally Jerry Seinfeld. I was telling GND, half joking, that I wanted to buy a panic rile and what it would set me back.

    The next day we got a check for the exact amount of the list price of the rifle from our mortgage company.

    It was a sign. And I blew it.

  35. I bought my panic rifles in 2003 and 2015, respectively.

    I am bad about stockpiling ammo, though. Barely enough to qualify as a stockpile.

  36. Don’t worry, Mare.

    More spending will fix it.

  37. Lotta lamposts missing their proper adornments.

  38. The rest of the state wouldn’t miss Lansing if something… happened.

    Just sayin’.

  39. We can just print the money. We are proving to the world that the AOC/Bernie model works just fine!

    It’s all a big test. We’re passing! Look how well we are doing.

    None of us will be working next month, and everything will be fine. We don’t need these material goods anyway.

    Meanwhile, just stay at home. Unless you feel like going out, then do that for mental health, because reasons.

  40. One guy posted that churches are exempt from the shutdown order in Florida, and people are losing their minds. It’s like they’ve never heard of the first amendment.

    I think these orders to shelter in place are illegal. You can legally quarantine people who are infected, but basically putting people under house arrest because they could potentially catch a virus can’t be legal. #notanattorney

    It makes no difference to me, because I seldom leave the ranch. Eventually we’ll need to go out for supplies. I’m hoping the hoarding is over by then and supplies are back to where they are normally.

  41. and then blaming Trump for every vaguely related death in their state when he countermands their absurd decrees

    He can just say, ‘I don’t run *insert whatever demrat state here*. It is up to the governors you elected – or you – to decide.’

    Hopefully we’ll be getting some positive feedback from various treatments, soon. Though, I expect, democrat run cities/states will fudge the numbers like Italy has been doing because $$ and the added bonus of bedeviling Trump.

  42. Half-Whitmer’s EO cited the Michigan code that supposedly gives her the authority to pull this shit, but I doubt it would hold up in court.

    Someone with a big wallet who’s losing big money ought to have standing to sue, but that doesn’t mean a judge will listen.

    Anarchy beckons.

  43. He can just say, ‘I don’t run *insert whatever demrat state here*. It is up to the governors you elected – or you – to decide.’
    ——–
    Good point Beasn. Seems like something he’d do.

  44. Question:

    Is it a win if we don’t gain any weight during this bs or is winning only if we lose or make gainzz during this bs?

  45. You’ll lose weight soon, mare, after the zoos run out of animals.

  46. Glenn Beck was saying the whole “We’re looking at whether masks are a good idea or maybe using a scarf” is preparation for opening up the economy.

    He also had Candace Owens on. She’s a smart cookie. She mentioned outliers with no massive death counts like Japan. I sort of missed the point she was making about Bangladesh but I think it was along the lines of “if we don’t see a massive die off over there, there’s something unusual going on”

  47. Paula keeps mentioning her fear of the Quarantine 15

  48. Quarantine 15? the length?

  49. Yes, Prager talked about that too, Jimbro. India. The high-density living, poor hygiene in areas. And their numbers are very low.

    Something is indeed going on. And it stinks and it’s not just Hotspur’s desk chair.

  50. No, like the freshman 15.

  51. Bill Whittle said the china reported figures are 40 times less that actual. Seems excessive, but wouldn’t surprise me. I think they have pretty good medical practices there.

  52. I’ve got a sprint planning meeting at 1pm. Should I play Skyrim on mute to keep myself awake, or try to calculate how big of a railgun I’d need to hit Beijing from here?

  53. They’re definitely under reporting cases and fatalities. I think everyone can agree on that. The amount of the under reporting is the question. Pretty good medical practices combined with an authoritarian government helped with control when they finally got around to it. Don’t know if that would go over as well anywhere else though.

  54. This ain’t no party

    This ain’t no disco

    This ain’t no fooling around…

    Does this quarantine make me look fat?

  55. DNC postpones National Convention over CoronaVirusFears Biden Dementia Fears.

  56. Where the f did everyone go?

  57. I’m in my stupid meeting.

  58. Yes, Prager talked about that too, Jimbro. India. The high-density living, poor hygiene in areas. And their numbers are very low.
    ————————
    Can confirm numbers are low. But the country is on lockdown. And I mean lockdown. No leaving your house unless it is essential and you have a pass.

    Our head guy in India had to *ahem* barter with local authorities to get a 48 hour pass to have IT workers box up computers and drive them to to operations workers.

    You get your ass beat otherwise.

  59. Just got out of my meeting. Note to self: go piddle before the next yawnfest marathon like that.

  60. Gotta keep a jar in your office for emergencies, Roamy.

    PRO TIP

  61. Is it just here, or are they doing emergency warning system tests every day?

  62. Haven’t heard one here.

  63. There’s a split-screen picture going around on Instagram of Tom Hanks’s wife, Rita Wilson.

    On the one side is a screenshot of her -hair back, looking somber saying they are stuck in Australia quarantine because of the Coronavirus.

    On the right, hair done, blithely saying “we made it home!”

    Problem. The background on both pictures is exactly the same. Same art etc.

    From the start, a lot of people were saying how sketchy the Tom Hanks/virus deal was. I wonder if this is a stupid internet set up, or the usual Hollywood desperate cry for attention?

  64. My office is the couch in the living room.

  65. Why didn’t you just take the phone with you?

    When mute is on, no one can hear you pee.

  66. And if that makes you squeamish, if your meeting had more than 10 attendees, I guarantee someone else did.

  67. no one can hear you pee

    Alien 55?

  68. I’d have done a better job if I meant to paraphrase Alien.

    “In a telecon, no one can hear you pee… unless you forgot to mute.”

  69. Sure as hell, if I’d done that, then mid-pee, someone would have asked me a question.

  70. I wonder if this is a stupid internet set up, or the usual Hollywood desperate cry for attention?

    The latter is my bet. See Kathy Griffin.

  71. Sure as hell, if I’d done that, then mid-pee, someone would have asked me a question.

    All those practice kegels were training for this moment.

  72. >>> or try to calculate how big of a railgun I’d need to hit Beijing from here?

    Yes, this one.
    Leon is my spirit animal.

  73. Sadly, it’d take either rails longer than I can fit on the property or a hell of a lot more current than I can draw even if I cheat and tap the power lines directly.

  74. What, you haven’t build a Thorium reactor yet? What good is living on a farm?

  75. Good afternoon. Whose turn is it to hogtie Leon and deliver him to The Opossum King, to stand trial for his crimes against marsupials?

  76. Didn’t leon shoot the opossum king and leave him to die, unsuccessfully?

  77. If you take a shot at the king…

  78. I drownt that pouch-nursed SOB.

    And wife said no on the 600 degree flouride salts.

  79. I was up all night,” he said during Wednesday’s edition of “Cuomo Prime Time,” broadcast live from his basement where he is now self-quarantining after announcing one day earlier that he tested positive for the novel coronavirus.

    The cause of Cuomo’s insomnia?

    “This virus came at me, I’ve never seen anything like it,” Cuomo said, telling viewers that he was racked with a fever of around 103 degrees “that wouldn’t quit.”
    “It was like somebody was beating me like a piñata,” he continued. “I was shivering so much . . . I chipped my tooth. Then, there were the fever-induced hallucinations.

    “My dad was talking to me,” a wide-eyed Cuomo said, referring to his late father, former New York governor and revered Democratic Party figure Mario Cuomo, who died in January 2015. “I was seeing people from college, people I haven’t seen in forever. It was freaky what I lived through last night, and it may happen again tonight.”

    –Things that never happened

  80. State Liquor Stores are not allowing people inside to shop, you have to tell the clerk what you want through the slightly cracked front door, then they allow you in to the counter to pay. The result is a line of 20-25 people standing together waiting for their turn, outside the store.

    https://tinyurl.com/vfehboe

  81. It’s almost like Cuomo has a team of writers that were all sick, and they combined all of their symptoms, and dreamed up some extras.

  82. This works equally well with mare:
    ——-
    I tried “Calm your tits” this morning. You’ll never guess what happened next.

  83. *narrator*

    The tits were not becalmed that day.

  84. Our pet groomers are not working. Rowan starts to chew his nails when they get long. Hearing the crunch-crunch sound at 2 AM is usually the prompt to get him there. They use the grinder on his nails, will not let anyone near his feet with clippers.

  85. I went in the gas station on the way home to gas up and decided to grab some beer. I had been in when they had just opened and it was just an “okay” selection. Today it was like the Taj Mahal of craft beer

    https://www.tradewindsmarkets.com/locations/hampden/

  86. Listening to sports radio today the topic was “If you could travel back in time to witness any sporting event, which one would you choose?”. It goes to show how desperate they are for topics but it was a good conversation. My personal favorite caller said watching Jesse Owens at the 1936 Olympics. The full quote was more specific: “Watching the look on Hitler’s face when Jesse Owens blew everyone away at the 1936 Olympics”

  87. Looks legit to me

  88. Good afternoon. Whose turn is it to hogtie Leon and deliver him to The Opossum King, to stand trial for his crimes against marsupials?

    *hacks up a lung*

    You made me choke on my apple. Thanks.
    *chortles in my beasaroos*

  89. Evidently Michigan has more covid cases than Californicate.

    More things that never happened.

    It’s all bullshit. 24/7 bullshit.

  90. Cuomo is a big oozy pu**y. Hate typing that but he is. An overnight fever of 103? Shivers? Wrap your dumbass up in quilts and push the fluids.
    Unless, his wife locked him in the basement and he had access to neither. Maybe she was trying to kill him.

  91. When she reaches for the fish tank cleaner his suspicions will be confirmed

  92. IT WAS A MAN-COLD, beasn.

    Sheesh.

  93. wait, man-covid, not man-cold.

  94. //You made me choke on my apple.//

    My grandfather choked to death on a baked apple at the tender age of 104.

  95. seagull3

  96. More things that never happened.

    It’s all bullshit. 24/7 bullshit.

    ——-

    I approve of this message. In fact, that’s been my message from day one.

  97. Antonio tested positive for Wuhan Flu. Tested on Sunday when my cousin drove him in to the ER. He is off the vent and they took him off oxygen today. They live in Spain. Carla and their son are still in quarantine.

  98. MA just gave Dan a Wuhan Flu asymptomatic home test.

  99. find trumps letter to Schumer. wow

  100. trump letter to schumer

    Savage!

  101. Not one word in that letter is incorrect. Fact wise.

  102. This is no time for a grammar lesson.

  103. Schumer is the prick that bragged about keeping Trump hotel workers from getting any relief in the BS Stage 4 train wreck. New Yorkers. He’s a crying cunt.

  104. **standing ovation** for letter to Schumer.

  105. Wiener silhouette is awesome. We actually buy furniture and place it for maximum wiener exposure. MA is blind. Mostly. She still spends part of her day on the back of the sofa looking out and barking.

  106. “maximum wiener exposure”

    ding

    What is the name of Carlos Danger’s band?

  107. Scott 🤣🤣🤣.

  108. I really liked the bologna pancakes. I love blanco basura recipes.

  109. Keep this here. I H8 chicken. Dan made a whole chicken today. With chicken gravy. I have to pretend to like chicken or risk pissing off the cook. Pray for Oso.

  110. Gretchen has to reverse course on chloroquine

    Nevada gov did too.

  111. It’s not rule 34, but there’s a website for everything.

    https://www.canyoufreezethis.com/

  112. You can freeze everything.

  113. youtube.com/watch?v=VjYoLbkN0lY

  114. Went to ‘Geezer Shopping’ hours at Safeway this morning. There was several varieties of TP available, also Kleenex.
    The meat counter was fully stocked.
    There was no 18 packs of eggs.
    Fewer varieties of bread available. The weekly flier advertised ‘spiral cut ham for $1.29/lb.
    There was none there. I asked the butcher: Oh, that has not been delivered, yet.
    It was a bunch of us ‘old people’ getting through. We were smiling at each other and getting it done…

  115. Dusseldorf enacted rigorous policies.


Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.

Comments RSS