Hello, and welcome to Big Boob Friday.




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Your model for today was born on September 28, 1996  in Taganrog, Novosibirsk, Russian Federation.  She stands 5′ 8″ and measures 362436 and 130 lbs.  Please be accommodating and direct your attention to Miss Maria Doroshina.



  1. She has potential.

    To be smashed hard by H2 gentleman (sausage).

    But she’s probably a plant by Putin so be careful out there.

  2. wakey wakey

  3. I’ll be honest, I want to find her pretty, but I just can’t get interested in her.

  4. Fake Ivanka. 9/10 would smash and pretend she was Ivanka.

  5. “Leave Poland alone” tag – heh.

  6. Model link for the ladies is spectacular.

  7. Santa Maria!

  8. Well, I’ll definitely say she has a really, really nice smile. That’s a plus.

    Blonde though…so, eh.

  9. I liked the Nessie and Moose link, too.

  10. I like her better with the slightly brown hair that appears to be her natural shade. Makes her eyes appear brighter.

  11. Today’s high is set to be 26F. Gonna have to get the heat gun out to clear some ice in my sliding door groove.

  12. Tool tickets go on sale in a little over an hour. Get ready for my disappointment, and complaining about bots.

  13. We’re always ready for your disappointment.

  14. I don’t know if you remember how pissy I was last time this happened. You know what? I’ll make sure I direct my anger directly to you in email.

  15. Calm down, Carin.

  16. Internet at home was shitty last night and this morning. Hope it’s better for the weekend.


    Ok. Playing some Tool. Maybe this will help.

  18. Just filled a few minuets (4) by getting dressed.

  19. People who listen to Tool while getting ready never on time.

    –The Lost Shit Confucius said

  20. Calming down is a scam.

  21. /subscribes to Mare’s newsletter

  22. A friend is also trying to get tickets. We’ve got a plan. If we both get tickets, we’ll just sell the extra. We’ve decided if we don’t get “good enough” seats, we’ll just buy them in the aftermarket.

  23. Well, Flynn isn’t depending on a pardon:

    IF the 302 even exists anymore. There’s no way someone didn’t send that through a shredder yet.

  24. Just replaced my keyboard’s batteries. Just in case.


  25. Someone distract me.

  26. We’re having another baby




  28. Little Maynard is going to be awesome.

  29. I mean Danny, Adam, and Justin are a bit more common. Maynard. THAT’S a name.

  30. Congratulations. We’re likely stuck at 1 without further interventions.

  31. Congrats to GND and the baby’s father!

  32. Quadratus or Tobias.

  33. I assume that’s why GND wussed out on the Ragnar?

  34. Augustine

  35. When’s the dd?

  36. Please don’t say late September

  37. First week of Oct

  38. Just took an Obama. That ate up another 2 minuets.

  39. Narrator: Little did Car in know, God had a sense of humor.

  40. Might want to find an alternate.


  42. LOL. I’ll tell my back up. Just in case.

  43. PRO-TIP: don’t watch videos on beef recipes on Lenten Fridays.

  44. Who can eat right now? First Tool tickets, now Mj. I’m a mess.

  45. MJ!!!! That is the bestest news ever!!!

    Congrats, turd face. Thank God your children look like your wife!

  46. Little MJorge is going to be so cute.

  47. I assume that’s why GND wussed out on the Ragnar?
    Yes, correct

  48. I’m on a forum that has a lot of first responders, law enforcement, etc. it’s a private forum with barriers to entry. Per some of the members, the Corona virus is concerning.

    “Anybody in the loop about a CDC conference call with state health authorities? We just got off the phone with someone on the call. Far more dire than CDC’s public announcement yesterday. Widespread shelter in place is allegedly being looked at as a real plan. ”

    “I’m in a several times per week meeting with a lot of different disciplines including some CDC folks and a world level virologist who works for CDC/World Health Organization. . He describes this, Corona, more appropriately known as Covin-19, as not being a ‘world-ender’ but as the most significant pandemic in our lifetimes.

    According to him the virus is now past every natural ‘firebreak’ and is in the wild in total. Containment at a world level is now impossible and countries that normally are not participatory in WHO are now reporting including Iran and others. As of Tuesday morning Iran reports 87 cases with 17 deaths. Despite their high number of deaths in Iran and a couple other places, the world wide mortality rate is right now about contrast the regular yearly ‘flu’ has a mortality rate of between .01-.02% worldwide.

    Despite public statements they (WHO/CDC) have no idea how exactly the disease is really being transmitted. For a while they were almost certain it wasn’t airborne but the cruise ship and a vertical apartment complex in China have given them reason to believe it may now be. In both instances the the transmission rate was well in excess of what should have been possible through a non-airborne vector. Likewise the incubation period is not certain either. They are experiencing people who are asymptomatic at 14 days, where they thought max limit was, who are showing symptoms at 30 days, well after being released from quarantine. Since a significant portion of those who are positive for the virus have no symptoms when they are contagious it has allowed world wide distribution.”

  49. 1551 people ahead of me in line.

  50. Congrats, MJ.

  51. Hopefully they all want floor seats.

  52. If Pupster doesn’t have an off game here pretty quick he’s gonna end up with a hamstring injury.

    Also, this commie slut has great eyes. Scott might trade up just to get a shot at drafting her.

  53. Ok. Playing some Tool. Maybe this will help.

    Where does the line start?

  54. Got two tickets!!!!!

  55. So, what’s this about having a baby when you’re supposed to be running the Ragnar?

    Everything from this morning is a blur.

  56. Congratulations MJ and GND!! Wow, that’s exciting. Maybe a girl this time? Yannow, not a lot of gals with Ancient Greek names anymore. Agatha? Demeter, Lysandra. Just throwing it out there.

  57. Speaking of Greek; MJ, when’s the last time you took it up the ass?

  58. So I have this weird idea where I use the fathead pizza crust recipe, divide it into quarters, roll those out and fold them into pockets filled with canned salmon, grated asiago, and pistachio pesto sauce.

  59. Speaking of Greek; MJ, when’s the last time you took it up the ass?
    Right now.

  60. pistachio instead of pine nuts? interesting…

  61. It’s really hard to find pine nuts not sourced in China anymore.

    Plus pistachios are a lot cheaper per pound.

  62. Are stone pines hardy to Michigan? Providing you could outwrestle the squirrels for the nuts, of course.

  63. Walnuts are good for pesto too. NIce and oily, and you can’t really taste them in there anyway.

  64. Wow, there are a lot of hardy edible pine nut trees.

  65. We have the trees all over the place in the state, but squirrels win the race nearly every time. I had a beautiful white pine in Ann Arbor that coned every year. I managed to get a cone with nuts in it once.

  66. like the walnut idea too

  67. English, or black walnuts. I actually like the black walnuts, but they are a lot harder to shell, and I’ve never seen them commercially in stores here.

    Lots of black walnut trees around. Local machine shop sells hand rolled harvesters that are really handy.

  68. If MJ cancels, one of you have to fill in. It would only be right.

  69. I still have never harvested any nuts from our Butternut tree. I picked up a bucket of them once but never peeled them and they rotted. Maybe this year.

  70. Carin, can I just whack my knees seventy times each with a hammer and call it good?

  71. /scratches laruaw off list of possible replacements

  72. do they have a hoverround division?

  73. Is the incipient MJspawn automatically registered for next year?

  74. Excellent model choice, Pups. Love the smiles.

  75. She has a wonderful smile.

    And a nice rack.

  76. The expert on milking nuts around here is Hotspur.

  77. Update:

    Videos reveal a dearth of intellect.

    MOST disappointing…

  78. Right now.

    I really shouldn’t pry.

    Congratulations to you, GND, and MJr.

    If you want to make her middle name Hotspur, I would be honored.

  79. Videos reveal a dearth of intellect.

    MOST disappointing…

    The key to these things is low expectations. Also low morals. In fact “low” covers a lot of ground in cases like these.

  80. Pretty sure they’re set on Maynard James* but thanks for the input.

    *boy or girl, because who knows, amiright?

  81. How about Aitch Ate?

  82. Pat.

  83. Morrissey

  84. Dweezil

  85. Zowie.

  86. Ingredients gathered for salmon pesto pocket experiment.

    Biting my tongue about what I think needs to happen with drag queens who do “story hours” just in case someone with less to lose has the same idea.

  87. Polycarp is a great name you never see anymore.

  88. salmon pesto pocket experiment

    I’ll take “things that sound dirty but aren’t” for $600, Alex.

  89. For some reason, Polycarp gave me flashbacks to the way your mom smelled after that one night.

  90. It does mean “many fish”, so that’s not surprising. St Polycarp was a student of St John, to whom Mary was entrusted by Jesus from the Cross. He wrote a letter that used to be read as scripture in the early Church before it was decided that such a privilege should only be afforded to writings of the OT or of the Apostles themselves. One of St Clement’s letters went through the same thing.

  91. Jimbro – opinion?

    “They actually don’t have any trauma specialists in France. For the first hour after that accident, she was still in that tunnel. And after an hour, they took her to a nearby hospital and she was alive for another three hours and they couldn’t control the bleeding from her pulmonary artery.”
    Later in the story it’s listed as a pulmonary vein. Don’t know, pulmonary vein v. artery, both bad to tear. I find it hard to believe there are no trauma specialists in France … I think that’s hyperbole. In the US she would have had a better chance at a Level 1 trauma center where there is a Cardiothoracic surgeon available assuming her extraction from the vehicle and transport to a Level 1 center happened quickly enough.

  92. There are plenty of trauma specialists in France, they just cause it rather than treating it.

  93. It does mean “many fish”, so that’s not surprising. St Polycarp was a student of St John, to whom Mary was entrusted by Jesus from the Cross. He wrote a letter that used to be read as scripture in the early Church before it was decided that such a privilege should only be afforded to writings of the OT or of the Apostles themselves. One of St Clement’s letters went through the same thing.


    Even though you spend a lot of time self-flagellating, I’ve learned a lot from you about my faith. I very much appreciate it.

  94. I think Imakickyourass is a lovely name and helpful during those awkward years.

  95. Kermit or Gonzo.

  96. Mare, what’s your middle name?

  97. Tex Lovera on February 28, 2020 at 12:45 pm

    Videos reveal a dearth of intellect.

    MOST disappointing…

    This is adorable.

  98. Boniface is a great name, and he was a badass, even if his name is basically “pretty boy”.

    Chopped down the Tree of Odin as the pagans were about to hang someone on it as a sacrifice, then told them to decorate a pine tree in honor of Jesus’s birthday. He was still holding the axe, I think, because they went along with it.

  99. Self flagellating is a big part of my problem, IYWIMAITYD.

  100. Hey Leon, you had commented a while back that you had perfected your pizza dough recipe, is it a modified fat head deal? I made empanadas from the same fat head recipe and they were killer.

  101. Similar to it, I think. I actually got it from originally, but I see it everywhere as the “fathead crust”.

    I actually forgot to get cream cheese, too.

  102. Comment by leoncaruthers on February 28, 2020 2:17 pm
    Self flagellating is a big part of my problem, IYWIMAITYD.

    Trade it out for some old-school self-flagellation.

  103. Oh good, we still had 4 oz, just enough.

  104. Congratulations MJ!

    Car in, did you get good seats?

  105. Pepe, re: coronavirus as being pushed by the CDC? Can we even trust Rosenstein’s sister?

    Speaking of which, husband’s company (large/international) shut down international travel. Son told us his company just shut down air travel.

  106. When son-in-law gave his 2 week notice to his company, they told him to go home and they’ll pay him for the two weeks. Financial co. don’t want anyone stealing their clients if they stick around or something.

  107. Freeman Dyson has passed, may he rest in peace, may swarms of man-made energy collectors and rotating habitats someday be built and bear his name.

  108. Yes, seats are good!

  109. I haven’t been active here for a while. But sometimes I come across news that is relevant to you all.

  110. You tried it before you read that, didn’t you?

    This is a friend cautioning others not to same the same mistakes he did. You’re a good man.

  111. A man with starch in his rectum, but a good man, nonetheless.

  112. Making this as soon as I have the house to myself:

    Haven’t decided if I should put the fish straight into the food processor and make a paste of it, or leave it in big chunks and combine in the pouches.

  113. I haven’t been active here for a while. But sometimes I come across news that is relevant to you all.

    Welcome to last week.

    Where the eff have you been? And why do you have that shit eating grin on your face?

  114. Freeman is a hellacool name.

  115. TUSHAR!! Good to see you, I too thought that article was relevant to our interests.

  116. Elizabeth

  117. CDC Alert: Do not eat random potatoes. You have no idea where that potato has been.

  118. Leon, I am still on strict keto diet. Can’t have carbs, even on the reverse route

  119. Hey Mare, Pup, Hotspur and Jim. I am kind of in between crises. You know, some existential, some ‘I think I put on my underpants backward’ kind….

  120. Hey Mare, Pup, Hotspur and Jim. I am kind of in between crises. You know, some existential, some ‘I think I put on my underpants backward’ kind….

    You know what would help get your mind right? Running a Ragnar race.

  121. Leon, remember, 3 years back you had fixed my Keto diet? I followed your advise, went down from 226 to 194, then life intervened, I slacked off, went up to 214 again, stayed there, got serious again 3 months ago, and again down to 198. I am back into overweight territory from obese. This time, I will continue till I get from Overweight to normal weight, which is 175 or less.

    So, long story short, not gonna go the vicar route. No ass-potatoes for me. Besides, those long slender eggplants have less carbs.

  122. Alex, I am an overweight (obese!) middle aged man with broken knees. I have no clue what a Ragnar race is, but it sounds painful.

  123. I had been just barely staving off dadbod by fasting and mostly keto eating, but I’ve been sick basically 1 week every month since September when Possum started preschool. First weekend in February was extremely bad. I am essentially completely sedentary at this point, and my condition is terrible. My weight hasn’t gone too high, but I’m as marbled as a good steak at this point.

  124. Go tranny, get you some menopausal hormones and you’ll be mooing in no time.

    *chews cud*

  125. I should get massively drunk and send my hangover bloodwork to an online doc and tell him I’m a 15yo girl who wants to be a man and I need to stop having periods NOW!

  126. I managed to survive another week and not get shot or robbed. Yay me. Got as tax refund this year. Went out yesterday and ordered a new pair of prescription glasses with “extra” features like anti glare, the auto shading thing in bright light. Kinda excited as I havent been able to wear sunglasses and drive for a 4-5 years now. I got them in poly carbonate safety specs so they’re range approved also. Im not going to know how to act once I get my “johnny cool” glasses.

    I think MJ should name his next child Archibald or Luther, or maybe Roland, but mostly Archibald.

  127. The salmon pest pizza turned out pretty fantastic. I will never make salmon loaf again.

  128. Pesto is a word, you muthfugginhampsterfuggin autocucumberselfpegger.

  129. Leon, calm down.

  130. Baby could be named Obama…. maybe Trump… Mohammed is popular too.

  131. I didn’t mean you had to go silent.

  132. Japan has closed it’s schools for a month.

    That sounds like a really good idea.

  133. I got busy reading.

  134. Petri dishes.

  135. Leon knows about virus loaf.

  136. Congratulations MJ and GND!!!!

  137. I get tomorrow off but have to work Sunday on the soup sandwich project.

  138. Has China closed it’s airports and borders for a month?

  139. I’ve been spelunking down recipe videos on the youtubes. Not a good idea when you’re somewhat fasting and restricting oneself during Lent.

  140. roamy, missed your Yeltsin comment. The timing would make sense.

  141. Question. From what we know, ebola is multitudes worse than this Chinese virus. So how come the world, the media, and Pelosi & co. are panicking over this but were ‘meh’ when the JEF brought ebola cases here?
    Something just ain’t right.

  142. Orange.

  143. SARS killed something like 1000 people before 0bozo said anything about it.

  144. In the US, or worldwide?

  145. I bought stock today.

  146. Though I will admit that I’m pissed that the company that owns Lysol, Reckitt Benckiser, dropped $2 a share. Kimberly Clark, maker of Kleenex, too. WTF, people.

  147. Good Old Rosa. She makes ‘Connect the cuts’ proud…

    “Several House Republicans walked out of a closed-door briefing on the coronavirus by Trump administration health officials after a Democratic chairman railed against the White House response to the crisis.

    Rep. Rosa DeLauro of Connecticut, the leading House health appropriator, kicked off the briefing by criticizing the administration for being disorganized and lacking urgency in its response. Several GOP members started to boo before most Republicans got up and walked out.

    “If I wanted to hear the politics of it, I’d read Politico or something, let’s be serious,” said Rep. Paul Mitchell of Michigan. Even Democrats were uncomfortable with DeLauro’s tirade.”

  148. US , I believe. Saw the stat in a comment thread today.

  149. That screams irrational market forces at work, Roamy. It’ll bounce back sooner than most, I bet.

  150. Roamy I bought stock today too. Yesterday as well, but after reading what Pepe posted I’m wonder if I bought too soon. We’ll see what Monday brings.

    I always like the name Otto. It was my grand fathers name. Seems like lots of old names are coming back into style.

  151. Doreen entertained respectable patrons.

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