Happy Independence Day 2019!

Not so much a song, more like spoken word

Mosquitoes count on this distraction for their festivities

(How to Choose Insect Repellents)

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So that’s how CA forest fires start!

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Meat slap

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Meat so good you don’t know whether to salivate or ululate

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I remember this diagram from the old Boy Scout Fieldbook

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Fireflies are in my fields but they’re just starting up

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Putting the ball in baseball

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For the ladies

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Your mom‘s nickname for me has been stolen by Big Firework!

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I hope everyone has a great holiday and stays in one piece unless they’re deliberately trying for accelerated entropy. And shit.

109 Comments

  1. Wouldn’t be the 4th without this one

    https://tinyurl.com/y6d5wxq7

  2. Laughing at the MSM’s sudden interest in the price of government, specifically “Trump’s parade”. They’re just pissed that Obama didn’t think of doing this first.

  3. This poat deserves something. I don’t know what but something!!

  4. Welp, guess who has two thumbs and will be wearing a Betsy Ross Flag shirt as often as possible? Yes, THIS GAL! *points to self with thumbs*

    This whole, “this flag is hurtful” is so sicking and stupid it makes me immediately hate, no loathe anyone who says it.

  5. In that “Jesus count” video, what exactly was on fire?

  6. Leon in 40 years:
    https://imgur.com/gallery/aeatrPC

  7. What mare would be doing all day if she could. But I’d be saying, “this is my happy place, this is my happy place” while doing it.
    https://imgur.com/gallery/yl9uYLs

  8. Well, heck, this is just cute:
    https://imgur.com/gallery/OPNesPZ

  9. Dogs have the most amazing expressions.

  10. https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

  11. ^^those guys are pretty sharp^^

  12. Saw this on F&F earlier this morning

    https://www.ninelineapparel.com/collections/mens-t-shirts/products/mens-t-shirt-old-glory

    Mine is ordered and on the way

  13. I think the fire is the “motherf*cking bootleg fireworks”. It really doesn’t matter what it was IMO, the video just gives us a way to witness the way the English language has morphed over time.

  14. Left Kapernick and Nike, Right normal people:

    https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

  15. https://tinyurl.com/yy92bur9

  16. Oooh, I like that t-shirt Jimbro.

    If you watch the Hodge twins video they correctly surmise that Nike and Kapernick planned this little stunt together to keep Kapernick relevant and to show Nike as “woke.”

    Silly, manipulative, bullshit.

  17. I hadn’t thought of that before watching that video but it doesn’t take much effort to believe it is true. And by releasing a few pairs that are on eBay for thousands of dollars they get to create the illusion that their sweatshop sneakers are valuable.

  18. https://tinyurl.com/y4u5d5xw

  19. I know it’s the NBA and hardly anyone gives a shit but I saw an interview with her on the local sports network and she seems pretty normal

    https://www.bostonherald.com/2019/07/03/kara-lawson-breaks-ground-with-celtics/

  20. It needs to be ON THE PAGE. Not just a link to it.

  21. https://tinyurl.com/y5n4boyl

  22. I can watch that ten times in a row.

    Woooooo

  23. wakey wakey

  24. I have to say, I’m really loving the eye thing. No on and off of glasses all day long. Losing them. It was an amazingly easy transition – I thought I’d get dizzy, etc. Nope.

  25. Cracked the window open so my reptile housemate can depart for the Outside from whence it came. Not a moment too soon, just got a look at all the droppings…egads, little critter’s been feasting. I get the suspicion I may miss having it around…

  26. Getting caught up on post. Pupster, get that dog a recording contract, guarantee it’s better than 80% of the acts getting air play.

  27. Justin Amash just lost his committee assignments. Dumbass.

  28. Comment by roamingfirehydrant on July 4, 2019 8:50 am
    Justin Amash just lost his committee assignments. Dumbass.

    ——–

    LOL Thanks, Roamy.

  29. As Ace would say, LOLGF!

  30. Still funny.

    LAWD REEKUS!

  31. Good read, now the song is in my head.

    https://www.steynonline.com/9519/youre-a-grand-old-flag

  32. LOL, good one, CoAlex.

  33. You know how, in Hollywood, every so often someone will “come out” as gay like it’s big news or something, even though pretty much everyone figured it out fifteen years previously?

    Yeah, that’s Justin Amash making his big announcement.

  34. Shout out to Sean’s derptastic DERP last night/this morning

    Comment by Sean M. on July 4, 2019 3:20 am
    Destroy English Redcoats, Patriots!

  35. The second bikini girl picture captivated me for a few reasons. Carefully posed and edited, awesome suit and impressively large yabbos. But the thing I wondered about the most was the contrast between her eyebrow and hair color. Something isn’t adding up here.

  36. Jeeez, saw an article about NASA moon landing tapes being up for auction. The crazy came out in the comments. It’s either you absolutely believe the landing happened, or its all a big fake. Keyboards are being pounded harder than your mom.

  37. Regarding Amash: What are the odds he’ll run as an “Independent” to try and act as a siphon of Trump votes?

  38. The first manned landing was real, but everyone died of radiation. Fortunately that was the secret one and the there weren’t too many in the know who had to keep silent. The public landings were all fake. Gotta keep the public from knowing the truth of phlogiston and the crystal spheres.

  39. *holds back wildly swinging Buzz Aldrin*

    Don’t punch down, Buzz.

  40. Amash had zero chance of winning as a Republican in the next election. So … not such a bold, brave move.

    Loser.

  41. Good poat, jimbro!!

    Lawd reekus wth is wrong with the people I live with? Husband and son (who is driving in tomorrow for a funeral we have to spend the weekend at) do not want to buy boomies. I feel the need to burn some shit and they like – meh.

  42. I bet the Hodge twins were quite the handful to raise.
    *voice goes low*
    “Yeah.”

  43. Is Amash going to start caucusing with d-rats?

  44. No fireworks here with our noise sensitive doggies. I’m surprised that we haven’t heard that many yet. Usually people are setting them off for days around the 4th. I thought about getting some dog CBD chews but figured they’ve survived this long without them and I don’t want to risk a weird reaction. Pass.

  45. Fireworks started going off during the play-offs. Then it almost sounded like the 4th the night the Blues won.

    Last couple of nights, it began to build again. Tonight will sound like a battlefield. Anyone with breathing difficulties know to stay inside.
    I hope our Chinese neighbors go big again. Last year they set off what sounded like cannons. Each time one went off, I pictured my MIL getting launched a foot off her bed.

  46. Who is broadcasting the parade? I thought Fox would carry it, but they’re not.

  47. Saw big fireworks and heard some loud reports on my way home through our capital city just before midnight last night.

    It’s going to be nuts tonight.

  48. I’m sure PBS will, after all, they’re (partially) taxpayer funded!

  49. But, holiday pay is nice.

  50. Ah, Mr. RFH informs me that the DC parade != Trump’s parade. So there’s video online right now of bands, cheerleaders, and floats, but the tanks are later.

    https://www.news4jax.com/live/watch-live-fourth-of-july-parade-on-constitution-avenue

  51. Twitter was funny about the parade. Lots of still pictures of the JFK and DDE inauguration parades with military hardware in them. The one tweet I remember was something like “AOC is gonna stand in front of the tank”.

  52. Fox is live streaming the parade on youtubes.

    I’d love to see AOC stand in front of a tank. Her name can change to St. (as in stupid) Pancake the Second.

  53. Think I’ll make a chocolate mayonnaise cake for our 4th celebration – which will be tomorrow when the Golden Child arrives.

  54. If I were younger, I would have Dan Crenshaw‘s babies.

  55. Wtf. My stepmom just posted a South Park gif on my wall of Butters saying “Aw geez I didn’t mean to almost kill Grandma”. I’m going to assume she fat-fingered the phone and delete that.

  56. Eh. If the parade isn’t floats festooned with the fetid remains of butchered Leftists, I’m not interested.

  57. Thrones of skulls are passe.

  58. Happy Fourth of July.

  59. me and mrs jay will also be sporting fancy old glory shirts. Thanks for the link jimbro.

  60. One of my favorite memories was a family get together on July 4th. All my dad’s brothers and sisters were there (except one who had already passed on). We all got together, and read the whole Declaration of Independence. One line at a time, switching people for each line. Really hit home with all the people reading it together.

  61. Nice!

  62. Great memory!

    Say what you will about Glenn Beck but he did a reading of the Declaration of Independence the other day which was great.

  63. I also ordered an Old Glory shirt.

  64. I’m hoping the shirts are quality thick t-shirts. So many t-shirts are thin cotton-poly mixes. I’ll wear it regardless but a nice thick t-shirt is a thing of beauty. I got a nice Life is Good brand shirt for Fathers Day that I’ve worn a bunch of times since.

  65. https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/north/arctic-fox-norway-canada-1.5197697

    Fascinating story

  66. Guess who just found out Mr. RFH invited people over for supper?

  67. The Widow Firehydrant?

  68. https://tinyurl.com/y35x873v

  69. Happy Independence Day! Watched Spider-Man. Has two scenes during credits. You won’t get them if you haven’t watched Capt Marvel. Brisket has been in Steelers crock pot since 6AM. Albuquerque has laws about smokers and grills and the distance they have to be from structures.

  70. Also, he emptied the Advil bottle and swears that he told me. I had to get the little one out of the bug out bag because Tylenol wasn’t cutting it.

  71. Ice Cream Man!

  72. Yes, I’ll take two please.

    https://tinyurl.com/y57a6cwh

  73. CLICK ON IT!!

  74. The Widow Firehydrant?

    BAHAHAHA!

  75. Picking up Chicken Man at the chicken hut

    He works 30 hours next week … sob

  76. Husband and I were discussing whether I was more like Kitty or more like Red. I said the more I watch it, perhaps I’m more like Kitty. She’s silly but goes Red-lite when you tick her off.

    Husband – ‘No, you’re definitely Red.’

    Me – ‘Well, when you live with dumbasses….*laughs like Kitty*…..btw, my lilac isn’t doing so well…*gives the stink-eye*.’

    Fin.

  77. Good for chicken man. Do you make him drive home?

  78. My day is gone thanks to a headache. Finally ate some scrambled eggs and I don’t know if it was the salt that I added, or the three ibuprofen on the side that did the job.

  79. No, he’s too good of a driver. I just want to get there and back!

  80. Houseguest cooked a venison roast in the crockpot.

    It tastes just like beef. Not what I expected.

  81. Nice to put the Coasties first, they always seem to get the leftovers in a military salute.

  82. CoAlex, God bless whoever invented ibuprofen.

  83. Wikipedia says Stewart Adams lead the team that discovered it. Sounds like a typical white male name, so in the biopic he’ll have stolen the idea from a black woman on that team and taken the credit.

  84. Google says the gamey taste comes from the fat.
    This was a very lean roast.

  85. Dinner is bass, blue gill, taters, and German slaw.

  86. The last time I hade bluegill I was about 12 years old.

  87. I’m allergic to Mayo. Dan modified a dill pickle pasta salad to mustard. He is pretty awesome about working around my allergies.

  88. Growing up in SE Massachusetts we never ate any freshwater fish. In fact, I distinctly remember my mother saying fish from a lake or pond was dirty. First time I had catfish I was a little nervous. Never had bluegill or bass.

  89. Growing up in Michigan, I’ve been to more than a few fish fries of catch from Lake Michigan. Never cared much for fish, though, so I’ve got no strong opinions about it.

  90. First bunch of firecrackers went off down at the dock. Chicken Little Rowan just ran under the desk and is leaning on my knee panting with the crazy eyes.

  91. I think most of the ponds and lakes in MA are dwarfed by any of the Great Lakes. We had fish regularly. Mom got us hooked on tuna sandwiches and fish sticks early on and it was a short trip from that to clams, scallops, lobster, cod and schrod.

  92. Fresh fish is amazing.

    Catch it, clean it, throw it on a fire. Best fish ever.

  93. The trout in Colorado was great.

  94. We had steaks, broccoli slaw, Pioneer Woman crash potatoes, poppers made with Boursin cheese and Costco mini-peppers, and peach crisp. I hadn’t been grocery shopping in a week, so that made dinner a challenge. The produce drawers are empty now. The steaks were on sale at Kroger and had been in the freezer, they really needed a longer marinade. Bitch, bitch, bitch.

    They went off to watch fireworks and leave me in peace.

  95. Scott, I have had venison chili and couldn’t tell the difference between it and beef. My BIL makes venison with a sauce of onions, mushrooms, a can of tomato soup (no water), and Worcestershire sauce, and that is excellent.

  96. They stroll through our yard!

    I need a bigger rifle.

  97. I can always taste wild. My super power. Getting my money from PBS

  98. those crash potatoes are awesome.

  99. Osita, can you eat avocado mayo, or is it the eggs you are allergic to?

  100. Home from work. They’re shooting fireworks off on my lake. Dogs aren’t too happy, and I’m too tired to be interested.

  101. I did really well tonight. I felt bad because some other gals didn’t. It sucks to suck … One girl sold three hundred more than me, and made something like fifteen dollars more.

    I didn’t tell her what I made.

  102. Another gal had the same sales and made fifty dollars less than me.

  103. Love freshwater fish. We’ve got bluegill, crappie (LOVE), and bass in our pond. Then there is the lake across the road. Husband hasn’t been fishing enough.

  104. Hey Oso, what are the Mexican saints/Jesus candles called?

  105. Easy there, MJ….

    https://tinyurl.com/y33qmec9

  106. Detonations! Explosions! Radiant pyrotechnics!


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