Weekend Memes












































  1. All of me is sore.

  2. This post is enriched with extra giffy goodness.

  3. sorry, my brain is still half asleep

    Extra…what do we call these things? They’re mostly not memes. Jokes? Quips?

    Quippy goodness?

    I haven’t had coffee yet

  4. It’s a chicken bacon chowder day.

    Also I have to decide where I want to move, but that is secondary.


  5. wakey wakey

  6. They are bon mot memes.

    I just made that up.

    I’m going to go with it.

  7. I’ve been kinda sore every day for the past two weeks. This week we’re supposed to ease up on stuff.

    NOT tired of the puppy yet. She is adorable, and I’m pretty sure she wants to stay here with us.

  8. we’re all calling it Pupper. I hope my friend doesn’t mind if she learns that instead. They gave it a too long name that simply doesn’t fit. Rosemary.

  9. Last night, the kids WOULDN’t put her in the kennel for the night. Eventually they did. They just wanted to snuggle with her on the coach while they played their games.

  10. Long freaking night. I either have food poisoning from store brand tabbouleh or the Norovirus finally found me. Either way, tabbouleh is going in the trash and I’ll thank you kind people for not making noise and leaving the downstairs bathroom open.

  11. She’s sleeping again. She was crazy running dog but the dogs usually take a morning nap, so she’s following suit.

    She LOVES the dogs here. I guess “her dogs” aren’t friendly with her.

  12. Rosemary = Rosie

  13. Jimbro needs a pupper to cuddle. That makes everything better.

  14. Mmmm, that sounds good, Pupster.

    No idea why I’m awake right now. Slept okay but only made it to 7:30. After work I didn’t go down until after 1 am. I think despite my half-ass window-blackening efforts, there’s still more light leaking into the room in the mornings now because Spring is coming. I might have to actually spend some money on real blackout shades.

    Oh, and I forgot to turn my noise machine on. Noise machine helps a lot. There’s a dipshit on our street with loud pipes that nothing can drown out, but otherwise I hear nothing else.

    Why is there always one dipshit with loud pipes? Harley guy can be counted on to wake us up on Sunday morning while he drives up and down the street to test his tinkering improvements, but that’s a Summer thing. You’d think we get a break. But nope, now in Winter there some other idiot with a little loud-pipes car.

    Holy shit, I’m cranky.

  15. Rowan is pretty good about cuddling but it has to be on his terms. When I first woke up he was all about getting his back scratched and rubbing his snout on the bed. After wrestling with his Nylabone a bit he took off for a nap elsewhere.

  16. Did you post puppy pics, Carin?

  17. /secretly replaces Lauraw’s coffee with decafe

    Let’s watch the hilarity NOW

  18. I have pupper pictures on facedouche. I’ll get some more today. It’s moving a lot so I get a lot of blurry pictures. lol.

  19. Everybody at work is sick, Jimbro. The entire day shift. I could kill them all. I walk around wiping down all the computer stations and phones and desktops and doorknobs as soon as day shift leaves. Sometimes right in front of them while they’re still there. I asked a couple of them to please wipe their stations down before they leave if they come in sick and they fucking think it’s funny.

    Is this not common fucking courtesy? Whatever. I will continue to do it whether they help me or not.

  20. ok yeah, a huffy bitch woke up in my bed this morning. my head ain’t right

  21. Good plan, doing it on your own. People just don’t give a crap.

  22. There is one other person who does the same. I worked with her last night. After day shift left, she cleaned the back office, I cleaned the front. As far as I know, we are the only ones. Which blows my mind. We’re all nurses, and it only takes ten minutes to protect yourself from your sick coworkers. Duh.

  23. Wasn’t it Scott who came up with naming the bug after whoever came to work sick? “Oh, you got the Mike flu.”

  24. I wasn’t awakened by loud pipes or Chi’s leaf blower neighbor but the Science Olympiad coach TEXTING MR. RFH AT 5:30 AM. (Competition starts at 8?) Who the fuck does that?

    I may nap later.

    I don’t know what I’m cooking today. Mr. RFH and Mini-me will be at Science Olympiad all day and go to dinner with the team to either celebrate or commiserate. Rocketboy is in MO with his fiancee. I should prep meals for the week.

  25. supposed ppl in the know that walk around sick shedding virusss’z’ need a brain check with a judiciously placed thump to the head with a pharmacopeia compendium –

    go martyr somewhere else, i don’t want your disease – thanks

  26. Working from home does have its perks.

  27. We have a very lean staffing level, so when people get sick they really can’t call out so easily.

    All it takes is one person to call out and suddenly each nurse has way too many patients. Like two nights ago.

  28. Dinner with the Wiserbuds tonight.

  29. Jedidiah Bila needs a sammich.

  30. https://tinyurl.com/y5swap6n

  31. Got the new Metro Exodus game. Very nice open world style single player fps. A new TV was on the list of things to do and the graphics are so good on the game I’m considering springing for the TV two weeks early.

  32. I just picked up Metro Redux, haven’t started it yet.

  33. So this “hate crime” attack on this actor in Chicago investigation has entered bizarre territory. Won’t surprise me a bit if this guy smokes himself in the next few days. He will become another poor victim of the opioid epidemic….

  34. https://tinyurl.com/y5egx9c9

  35. Donkey Chompers may be more hated than Trump,

    This is really fun to watch.

  36. Gym later today. Deadlifts and presses and a run.

    I need to clean the apartment and cook up lunch for the week.

  37. I just got off the phone with my scrap metal guy.
    (Yeah, I’m so poor that I have a guy…)

    He called me just to say that he won’t be coming by today because it’s ugly & ‘raining and his son stopped by. He was cooking breakfast.
    “Is tomorrow OK?” Dude, next month is OK in my book! I don’t care what you do other than enjoying life!

  38. If Clinton were still in charge, Donkey Chompers would have had a weight lifting accident by now

  39. I need a scrap metal guy. I’ve got trees wrapped in old wire fencing, and more than a few growing around rusty old plows, rakes, and disks.

  40. They are setting her up for an ouster on ethics violations with the boyfriend “staffer”, then they’ll get Crowley back with a special election.

  41. “roamingfirehydrant on February 16, 2019 at 9:36 am
    Jedidiah Bila needs a sammich.”



  42. If Clinton were still in charge, Donkey Chompers would have had a weight lifting accident by now

    She never would have been allowed to run.

    When Trump won in 2016, he broke the Clinton hold on the Dems. That’s going to have repercussions for decades. Combined with the fact that Obama’s tenure gutted the dems of a lot of seats at the state and local level, and the party basically is divided between the old-guard corporatists in their safe, deep blue districts, and the young radicals looking to supplant them. Everyone else who could have taken over the party for Pelosi and Schumer was voted out in 2010, 2012 and 2014.

  43. Is Jedidiah Bila a conservithot, or a liberthotian?

  44. Civ VI added spyware and global warming/resource depletion mechanics a la Gore and Malthus. Brilliant business decisions.

  45. I believe she’s more of a conservathot.

  46. That is a really nice booty, though. Not as good as the ones at my gym, but not bad at all.

  47. Really windy here today. Finally starting to get over the Ebola strain that going around. It has been one of those that morphs into other issues in people, like bronchitis, pneumonia, etc.

    Dealing with a knife issue today. Someone decided to take one of my designs and have a batch produced by a third party. Their argument is that I don’t make enough, and if I don’t meet demand someone will step in, and we made a small change so it’s different for legal purposes…..

    It’s nothing worth suing over, but it’s still stealing. Plus I want to find out who they are and inform knife people on the situation.

  48. If you guys were still thinking about gaining valuable life skills, welding is awesome. I have been thinking about getting a welding machine and taking some classes for years.

    A metal lathe, some grinding wheels…CAD knowledge…basically if you become proficient at working metal you become very, very, good to have around.

  49. That sucks, Pepe. I hope you are documenting all of this, just in case it does become something worth suing over.

  50. Called off dinner. I feel like I’m coming down with the crud I’ve been fighting all week.

  51. Laura, have I linked any of Eli’s videos for you?

    He’s going to be a handy guy to have around in the burning times.

  52. Pupper update

  53. That channel convinced me that an angle grinder is basically the most critical tool if you want to do any serious metal work.

  54. We’ll have electricity. We won’t need spears. Come on. All that guy’s doing is destroying nice wrenches.

  55. Just got back from the store, my cashier’s name was Dejavu.

  56. We’ll have electricity. We won’t need spears. Come on. All that guy’s doing is destroying nice wrenches.

    I wish I shared your sunny optimism. We’ll need spears when the ammo runs out either way.

  57. There are better ways to make spearheads than how he’s doing it.

    And if the ammo runs out you either use bayonets, billy clubs, or tomahawks.

  58. I’d think lawnmower blades or leaf springs would be better, but I suspect the build from a wrench is faster.

  59. His armor builds from tread plate don’t seem wildly impractical, either.

  60. I just checked and there’s free CAD learning sites on the internet. There are towns near me here in Central CT that are known for their density of average-Joe, garage machinists. People who have the knowledge and skills to make useful things out of metal- such as tools that make tools- are incredibly good to have around and they will never starve. Even if all they ever do is weld repairs.

  61. Wow.


  62. Everybody is going to Fusion 360 for CAD/CAM. Free to download, lots of internet support. I can’t use it because it demands internet connectivity and I don’t have the bandwidth. If you have the time, it would be great to learn. Most of the work is in design, machining stuff is a pretty mechanical process.

  63. I need to learn things wildly outside of my knowledge base if I want to keep my brain supple into old age. Plus I just love working with metal, though it has been years. Thanks, Pepe!

  64. Pepe, I saw this and immediately thought of your knives


    You may feel differently but it sure as hell made me do a double take

  65. Trump is about jobs and prosperity. AOC is about human suffering. Gee, I wonder who winds that popularity contest outside the wards of the insane?

  66. Jimbro, he has some pretty clean designs. Pretty pricey for what it is. One of the high end Chinese companies would charge about $250 or $300 and do a great job.

  67. Bruno Ganz, who played Hitler in the 2004 film “Downfall”, has died at age 77.

    What’s your favorite bunker rant parody?

  68. https://tinyurl.com/yyyo346q

  69. https://tinyurl.com/y4lhj4r5

  70. Wow.


    Why are they going that fast?

  71. I think I need to get a real life . I just called the pizza place for dinner delivery and the girl said “hey, Frank. What’s up? The usual tonight?”
    WT actual F??? You know my name?!? How, what, where , why wWHAT…

  72. Low visibility and no traction situation. I don’t think they were going that fast, but stopping distance was longer than seeing distance which is a bad place to be.

  73. 4WD gets you to the accident quicker.

  74. I was in an accident once where I slid on packed snow at a high rate of speed FOREVER. Hit a curb, slid across the corner of someone’s lawn into the street on the other side where I spun out.

    Blew out both front tires, but it was a solo accident and no one was hurt. AWESOME.

  75. I kind of thought that was the case, Pupster. Based on my recent almost two accidents (not my fault) in 3 days I think people are capable of all kinds of driving stupidity.

    But yes, not being able to stop on a slick surface is heart stopping.


  77. Ever since then I take my time in snow, and give everybody who gets irate and passes me the finger. OK, no. But I’m thinking it.

  78. Anyone slower than you is an idiot, anyone faster than you is a maniac.

  79. Seinfeld

  80. A couple years ago I drove to San Antonio from Colorado Springs to attend a friend’s wedding a couple days after Christmas. It was when there was that big snowstorm across Kansas and Oklahoma. I was driving through OKC on a sheet of ice on all the highways. At one point I was stopped in traffic while a pickup truck ahead of me kept spinning off the road every time he tried to get going. I looked into my rear view mirror to see a semi jackknifing right behind me. About shit my trousers.

  81. Smollett paid the Nigerian brothers to participate.


  82. Nothing on TV tonight it seems. I think I’ll be watching “two mules for sister Sara” while shoving a veal parm sub in my piehole.
    And you thought you were a lonely single dude, Alex? Welcome to MY world, motherfucker.

  83. Mr. RFH, baby Rocketboy, and I were driving to his parents in VA for Christmas. It had rained and had gotten cold enough that the bridges iced over. I was very, very glad that Mr. RFH was driving, that he had learned how to drive on ice in NJ, and that no one was coming the other way. We fishtailed all over that bridge.

  84. I remember that, CoAlex.

  85. Nintendo dropped Netflix, so the Wii doesn’t work any more. I got the Roku stick working and am watching the British baking show.

  86. Where do you live in C-bus, Alex?

  87. but it was a solo accident and no one was hurt. AWESOME.

  88. https://tinyurl.com/Quit-it-MARE

  89. Accurate representation of crazy opossum feets.

  90. Pupster, I’m up in Lewis Center, near the mall.

  91. The main danger posed by Ohio is its drivers whenever there’s the least bit of rain or snow.

  92. Maybe farrier is salty.

  93. “It feels like if I had said it was a Muslim or a Mexican or someone black I feel like the doubters would have supported me a lot much more,” Smollett said. “And that says a lot about the place where we are as a country right now.”

    No, you bigot – the “doubters” never supported you because they saw through your bullshit from the first moment this story was put out there.

    You were counting on people not doubting you precisely BECAUSE you said that your attackers were MAGA-hat-wearing, gay-hating white men.

    As it turns out, you hired two black men who are probably Muslims to stage this crime and waste valuable taxpayer money which could have been used to catch REAL criminals.


  94. Will he get a pass or will he get Roseanne Barred?

  95. Time Magazine person of the year.

    That is my guess.

  96. Nike spokesman.

  97. The NFL has already agreed to an out of court settlement with Smollett for $60 million.

  98. If he were white and straight he would get 3-5.

  99. TiFW, exactly what I was thinking.

  100. In the 1960s, nobody had to make up hoaxes about persecution. I guess we can call this progress.

  101. I almost wish I followed sports or current events so I knew what y’all were talking about.
    I have no idea who this Smollett guy is or what he did to offend everyone. I guess it will flybby my radar sometime next week?

  102. Driving into Chicago in my carpool one day, Roy, our driver, hit a patch of ice, and we did a 360 degree spin at about 65mph. Mind you, I was in the front passenger seat, that had no airbag and a busted seat belt.

  103. Chi, a gay black actor on a TV series you’ve never heard of was supposedly attacked by white guys who poured bleach on him, hung a rope around his neck, called him names and said he was in MAGA country. In Chicago on one of the coldest nights of the year at 2 AM. He kept his Subway sammich in hand, and it was reported that he had broken ribs.

    A couple of days later, he is videoed dancing, which is what everyone with broken ribs does. He does a couple of interviews about what a horrible hate crime he has been a victim of. Chicago police check surveillance cameras all over the place, see him and his sammich, but no attack.

    Now it comes out that it was two black guys, and he hired them to make it look good.

  104. They kept the receipt for the rope. For some reason, this part cracks me up the most.

  105. I’m waiting for the “brown people suck” receipt at one of the local Mexican restaurants to be found out as a hoax. Because racists who hate brown people always enjoy burritos and cervesas and are stupid enough to write nasty messages on credit card receipts with their name printed on them.

  106. oh. Thanks. I saw y’all talking about this story the other day.. I think the most offensive part is that he had Subway. What self respecting black man from shytown eats at Subway?

  107. It was 2 AM. Must not have had a Denny’s around.

  108. Even Waffle House was smart enough to move out of that part of town?

    I liked Chicago the one time I went. But when i got in a cab one night and told the driver where I wanted to go, he turned around, looked me over and said “no. I ain’t gonna have that on my conscience.”
    Apparently, the place i was headed was on the wrong side of the tracks for skinny white boys.
    He ended up recommending a different blues bar in a nicer section of town. I had a blast anyway.

  109. Dmitri emitted radioactive particles.

  110. Denny’s at 2 am is divided between the punk section and the goth section.

  111. https://tinyurl.com/y5v7gufp

  112. Comment by lauraw on February 16, 2019 10:10 pm
    In the 1960s, nobody had to make up hoaxes about persecution. I guess we can call this progress.


    This country is so not racist we have to fake it and make up new terms like MICROaggressions because the problems are so small. How can we victims if the crime doesn’t happen?

  113. The Bronx Turnip is looking forward to spending that $3B in tax incentives NY was going to give to Amazon.

  114. 8:30 and nobody made coffee?


  115. wakey wakey2

  116. I had heard that they might tag Smollett for mail fraud and didn’t understand why. I missed this part of the drama.

  117. So, they think he mailed himself the letter?

  118. “He has now been further victimized by claims attributed to these alleged perpetrators that Jussie played a role in his own attack.”

    LOL. Biggest victim ever!

  119. I’m starting to wonder if maybe we shouldn’t have just kept the homers in the closet back in the 80s when they unleashed a deadly sexually transmitted virus on the world…..but hey, I could be crazy…..

  120. Oops….sorry that was the the infinitely small population of hetero IV drug users that spread the disease. Not men placing their penis in another man’s rectum violently enough to tear the tissue allowing bloodborne exposure of the virus through semen. …..that’s different….that’s “love”.

  121. He should have just started kneeling at inappropriate times. That’s the traditional thing to do when you’re about to be fired, right?

  122. That will be his next play.

  123. Ran across these YouTube vids titled “Pitch Meeting” probably late to the dance, but if you haven’t seen any of these some of them are very funny. Recommend 8/10

  124. I don’t even get why hetero couples do buttsehcks. Introducing a naturally immunosuppresant substance (semen) to an easily damaged mucus membrane would get anyone sick eventually. All that “straight” anal pr0n has the stink of propaganda, and now we have a whole generation of young people who think it’s a normal sex act.

  125. Oops….sorry that was the the infinitely small population of hetero IV drug users that spread the disease. Not men placing their penis in another man’s rectum violently enough to tear the tissue allowing bloodborne exposure of the virus through semen. …..that’s different….that’s “love”.

    The Venn diagram of men who have sex with men and drug users has a significant overlap.

  126. Comment by scott on February 16, 2019 6:27 pm
    4WD gets you to the accident quicker.



  127. Does the spread of “hate hoaxing” indicate we’re less racist, or that it’s just different segments of the population that are virulently racist?

  128. I mean, fuck, if we’re going to get called racist no matter what, the only thing keeping us from blackfacing it up 24/7 is that it would be kinda lame…

    Seriously, it gets obvious real quick nobody’s thought this through.

  129. Forgot about that guy, Troy, you’re right he’s really funny.

  130. They don’t have to think it through, they have the megaphone, and are controlling the message. But, slowly, that’s changing.

  131. I gotta stop talking about that kind of shit. Does no good with the D.

  132. She is mentally ill

  133. She’s also Canadian.

  134. Car in, I think I figured out a way for you to get Puppers full time.

    Train her to bark uncontrollably whenever

    – the TV is on
    – someone is on the phone
    – lights get turned off

  135. Does no good with the D.



  136. I wish I could live rent-free in leftist heads the way Trump and Pence do.

  137. It would cut down on expenses, but it’s a shitty neighborhood.

  138. A friend from work just posted this – lol:

    69 west has horses in the middle of the express way

  139. Page has decided that gay is more important than human.

  140. It’s kind of sad, because she sort of had that deadpan /funny acting thing down, and now you see it’s not an act, and it’s not amusing. She’s filled with hate and disinformation.

  141. She’d probably be a lot happier if she was married, pregnant, and going to mass every week.

  142. Ellen Paige is a lesbian.

  143. I place actors and actresses on the level they were meant to be in society….a step below prostitutes and a step above beggars.

  144. Mare, I know. I stand by my statement.

  145. hmm, if I take 1/2 of a 12 hour Mucinex DM, will that last 6 hours? Or be half as effective for 12, and not allow me to sleep tonight?

  146. Walmart has a drop-off bin for old eyeglasses. I don’t know if they are working with Lions Club or another charity, but I donated four pairs that have been sitting around for a while.

  147. Jay, I would bet on half as effective, but you can always try a half now and take the other half in a few hours if it doesn’t kick in enough.

  148. One of Mini-me’s classmates. https://vimeo.com/317804841/4833434b9f

  149. Alex, it had nothing to do with your statement which is correct.

    It was a stand-alone sentence about her mental health. Hers is not what you’d call, sterling.

  150. He’s amazing, Roamy and pretty darn cute.

  151. This is a fair statement on the women in our society (many societies)


  152. Heh, I don’t want to take it if it lasts 12 hours, or I won’t get to sleep tonight.

  153. When I’m desperate enough to need it and have to work the next day I’ll go with a 1/2 dose of Nyquil taken early in the evening. A couple of times a year when I can’t breath I’ll use Afrin nasal spray which dries the snot out pretty well and lets you at least breathe overnight. When it wears off the next day your nose begins leaking like a faucet with an old washer.





  154. I’m on the upswing from my norovirus. In 48 hours I’ve had 2 cups of coffee, 2 ginger ales, a few glasses of water and a dry bagel. I’m just starting to feel hungry again but I think I’ll hold off.

  155. I take a sudafed 12-hour and a melatonin. It seems to clear my head and allow me to sleep.

  156. Carin?


  157. Elliot has a cold too, cuz he’s acting like a little asshole, growling and snapping. Won’t eat either.

  158. He might need an ass kickin.

  159. He got one.

  160. A little warm broth might get him to feel better for a while.

  161. He’s not interested in any food at the moment.

  162. J’Ames?


  163. It is snowing like the dickens out right now.

    The dickens!

  164. You probably need a big steaming mug of Hot Dickens’ Cider.

  165. Saw this and thought of Lauraw and Carin


  166. gawddamn right.

    those were sweet lil’ baby brassicas in the photo, btw

    so cute

  167. Doreen expectorated red phlegm.

  168. wakey wakey 3

  169. Up since before 6 because … puppy. Who is napping now.

  170. Puppy’s real owners are going to have to BRING IT when they take her back home. She’s awfully happy here. Someone is always here and she has two dogs to play with.

  171. You have a little Indian boy too?

  172. Late start, was having an involved dream and didn’t want to wake up. MMM shortly.

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