Weekend Memes

































This is clickable:


  1. The one time I don’t wake up at 3 AM.


  2. That’s cool Roamie!

  3. In other news, I’ve decided to sabotage Boy2’s weight loss program so I don’t lose the contest.


    *makes pancakes

  4. We’re having an early Thanksgiving today and I keep thinking we’ll be watching NFL football. Ah well, college football will fit the bill.

  5. I think the college game is more better, but both have too many penalties and commercials. Happy Turkey Day Dr. Jim.

  6. Today is the day for cleaning out the fridge and eating leftovers so there’s room to defrost the turkey.

    I need to get back on the keto wagon, but that’s going to be hard to do this time of year.

  7. I’ve been sticking to the low carb regimen but not seeing the results. I guess it has been 7 years since I dropped 40 lbs with Adkins, it is not working the same miracle for me this time.

  8. I’ve eaten more meals since I’ve been at my mom’s house for 2 days than the previous 3 days as a rough estimate. Biggest difference? She only has real food here. I don’t think I’ve eaten any food with unidentifiable ingredients in it.

  9. The only place to eat near my office seem to all be sandwich shops or pizza places of some sort. There’s a diner that serves breakfast all day, which is nice because I can get an omelet. I try instead to limit myself to eating between 10-2, with one big meal and some light snacking before and after (mostly nuts, sunflower seeds, or salami and cheese). I try to cook meals for the week, but something I want to both eat every day AND that’s low carb is tricky. Right now that basically means meatballs.

    That reminds me that I need to buy new pans. The ones I have are warped on the bottom and are ten to fifteen years old. Costco has a nice set for about $300, so I’ll probably pick up those when I go later today to buy meat.

  10. Oh thank God. One of my long-time friends on Faceplant finally got a new cat. Hopefully this means he stops posting as his dead cat on FB. That was seriously creepy and went on WAY too long.

  11. https://is.gd/L_to_R__Pup_comma_weightloss

    Making fun of the blind dog?

  12. My buddy had a blind Cocker Spaniel and he would chase balls the exact same way

  13. I see that the latest Cygnus was successfully launched this AM. Ice cream and fresh fruit – imagine how happy those guys on the ISS are. What was your work, Roamy?

    I spent my childhood fascinated by all things NASA. Many, many days spent at Langley on tours…

  14. Chi, there is a platform for materials experiments on the outside of ISS. I have one experiment there now, and two on their way. I am looking at how various polymers hold up in the space environment, how accurate my ground simulations are, and in one case, how much power we can get out of thin, flexible solar cells. That is a very cool one – they can fit a solar array into a 2.5″ x 4″ x 4″ space that when deployed, generates about 100 Watts.

  15. That’s pretty awesome! I had no idea that I knew so many geniuses. You’re like an actual rocket surgeon, huh?

  16. Chi, I get paid to break things. When there’s not bureaucratic bullshit, it’s the best job in the world.

  17. Re: bullshit – manager told us of possible gov’t shutdown Dec. 8.

  18. Not that I want to hurt anyone I love & care about, but – shut it down. Drain the swamp.

  19. Unfortunately, my contract wouldn’t be affected unless the shutdown goes a few months.

  20. https://www.smobserved.com/story/2018/11/09/politics/justice-ruth-bader-ginsburg-will-retire-from-the-us-supreme-court-in-january-2019/3658.html

    Since I haven’t heard this anywhere else and the usual suspects have not been caterwauling, I’ll take it with a grain of salt.

  21. How is everyone? I’m out of my solitary confinement to the bathroom.

    Stupid stomach virus.

  22. maybe I should cook the turkey today. Nope, have to go to a bar to watch the ISU Texas game. Only on Longhorn network

  23. Mom bought me an electric meat grinder a while back, just used it for the first time yesterday. Took five minutes to do what would have taken me a half hour of hard work with my little norpro hand crank grinder. Game changer.

    Scott is gonna cook up our first batch of home ground chuck burgers today while I’m at work. I’m in the process of turning the upstairs freezer mostly into a healthy ready-made meals freezer. The bulk foods for cooking will be in the cellar deep freeze.

    Next: Seasoned chicken burgers.

  24. Our downstairs chest freezer is where foods go to be forgotten.

  25. Just have to watch how hot the grinder gets, laura. The hand crank will still be better for temp sensitive meats. You can freeze the metal parts.

  26. I have so much stock, this year’s turkey carcass is getting tossed without processing.

  27. Clint Eastwood day on TV, it seems. I started with For a Few Dollars More. Next is Good Bad and The Ugly, followed by Hang ‘Em High.
    I have a busy day ahead of me. Maybe not enough beer, though?

  28. I was going to prep a bunch of freezer meals. I think there are two.

    I made hash for lunch and subbed beets for the potatoes. Do not mix the eggs into beet hash, it makes them pink. I should have left them as fried eggs on top for Mr. RFH, he likes fried eggs. (Runny yolks are gross. Pink egg > runny yolk)

  29. No way, runny yolks are the best! Had hash for breakfast too, the cook made my over easy eggs over medium. BOOOOO!

  30. Runny yolks (I call them dippy eggs thanks to an old GF) are only way to cook eggs. Toast ready. And or dripping out of the sammich bread.
    Maybe an occasional hard boiled/deviled egg.

  31. I have a turkey carcass and the drumsticks in the freezer waiting for me to make soup next week

  32. Egg yolk is the original sauce which all others seek to emulate.

    I bought a whole turkey, gonna sous vide half of it and make soup from the bones and other half, for canning and putting up in the cupboard. There’s gonna be Winter soup emergencies. Joe Bastardi says it’s gonna be another killer cold and snowy one. Brrrr.

  33. Purple/blue hair sighting at meijers just now. And I mean both colors. Overweight and older than me.

    Carry on

  34. What temp are you doing the turkey at, laura?

  35. I like my eggs scrambled without any wetness at all. The only thing that I like “rare” is a thick, juicy steak, and even that has to be closer to medium rare….

  36. Carryover cooking should take care of wetness in scrambled eggs, agreed. But if you cook them until there is no wetness, they are overcooked.

  37. Jay sounds like Gordon Ramsay with the egg advice. Thats his way to cook ’em scrambled.

  38. Are you sure it was a stomach flu?

    It could have been undercooked eggs.

  39. This weekend: Finishing getting the apartment in shape

    Next weekend: Seeing about getting a cat

    That’s the plan, anyway. Turkey torpor may put it off a week.

  40. Wow. I just now got to finish watching the Ohio State – Maryland game.

    Had to take Boy1 to werk and then got a service call from my werk. It was touch and go the whole game.

  41. Did the vacation cheer up grumpy girl, CARin?

    I have an idea…


  42. I think so. But I’m sure a bunch of Newfie would be s good back up plan.

  43. Jay, I’m going to use the Chef Steps turkey recipe. I don’t remember the temp, but they put the legs in first for so many hours, then drop the temp and add the breasts for the remainder of the time. Worked out well last time. I probably won’t use their salt and sugar dry brine mix this time though.

  44. Man, I wish someone had told me when I was younger how important it is to always use the exact same name.

    Scott is my middle name. I have used Jonathan Scott, J Scott, Scott,
    Jonathan S……….and the jury duty people send notices to each and every one of them.

    I am supposed to serve twice in the next 3 months.

  45. So jelly, even Steven. Do you want to serve or are you looking for reasons to not serve?

  46. Watching Narcos Season 4

  47. Comment by osoloco11 on November 17, 2018 8:01 pm
    Watching Narcos Season 4

    How many of them are you related to?

  48. I can’t and I won’t.

    I’ll be pissed if I have to show up.

  49. Knock on wood, I haven’t been summoned for jury duty in along time. I do get subpoenaed for child custody and abuse cases at least once a year. I’ve only had to testify once and that was over 10 years ago.

  50. CoAlEx…we are seriously trying to figure out my Kevin Bacon to the Sinaloa cartel. I have at least 6 points of contacts.

  51. Neither Dan nor I have ever received a jury summons. Almost 40 years of registered voting. I know illegals and green card holders with more jury action.

  52. Great poat, Pups.

    Got done with the knife show. Had fun, but we’re tired. Tampa Bay Bucs (I think ) are staying at our hotel. Whoever plays New York tomorrow. Guys are big. Fans standing around waiting for autographs.

  53. I was the foreman on a jury once. Interesting experience, but I’m not in a hurry to do it again.

  54. I can’t live on $10 per day.

  55. Been summoned once, it was interesting but I wouldn’t want to do it again. I was an alternate on a civil medical malpractice case.

  56. That barely covers the gas I would burn getting there.

    Screw that.

    I’ll turn into a woman hating racist nazi and they will send me home.

  57. Watch Narcos Mexico. Not my fault if I remember Kiki. Sinaloa Aguirre’s. Texas Jew knows.

  58. https://is.gd/JEV81r

  59. There’s a D&D game in my house, and the kids keep slamming the fridge door shut. I’m just waiting for the shelves to collapse again because I ain’t cleaning it up.

  60. When did I get old.

  61. I H8 voter fraud. I’m on the familia DL because these low info single issue assholes can’t handle truth of any kind. Watched the Tricky Dick Johnny Cash deal on Netflix. Only one hippie bitch needed punching

  62. Weirdest thing happened tonight and I’m sorta ready to fight someone.

  63. Do tell, Carin

  64. Ethan had two friends over- long time soccer friend sam and another kid Cole. They basically bought a ton of food, ate it, then hung out acting like teenage boys.

    Cole is the younger brother of one of Erin’s ex friends. they were besties, girl was at our house all the time. Then they had a falling out. Erin was pretty hurt by it, and I really never got to the bottom of it.

    Well, apparently cole isn’t supposed to be at our house because????? Something his sister ( who smoked a shit ton of pot until she started hanging out with erin) said about us/her I don’t know.

    I was in the bathroom and the dad came to the door asking for Cole. The dad demanded to see ethan and sam too, and pat didn’t know enough to think it was anythng. I could hear the dad grill sam if he needed a ride home (???).

    The dad apparently beats cole, and I don’t know what he thought was going on here, but I am basically shaking mad.

  65. I don’t know what Erin’s ex lying Bitch friend has said, but I just can’t stop thinking about that poor kid. Ugh. Emily used to tell us how awful her parents were, and her behavior demonstrates that it obviously fucked her up good. Gah. I want to give that boy our spare room or something

  66. The dad must have thought we were shooting drugs or something here. He shows up to a bunch of teenagers eating pizza- mom and dad in the house. Dude is not welcome to ever step foot on my property. Who is he to. One to my house and demand to see anyone?

  67. Typos. You get the idea. When I explained to pat the situation, he was pretty mad. He’s just too easy going to get suspicious. He figured the dad wanted to talk to sam and ethan about something sports related.

  68. You don’t go to another parent’s house to talk sports. My hackles would be up too.

  69. That was weird.

  70. Or maybe Emily lied about her parents to you, then lied about you to her parents.

    DD#3 had a friend who was a real drama queen (probably bipolar) – had a different story for every situation, depending on who she was talking to at the time. Couldn’t keep her stories straight. She was real bad news – her mother was a real piece of work herself.

    Ruined some kid’s life because she got pregnant and refused to admit to her mother that the sex was consensual. Swore that she was a virgin (she wasn’t), and told her mom that she had been raped. Pressed charges against the young man, and he was found guilty.

    She was a manipulative little bitch, but she hid it very well, and was able to convince others of all kinds of things that simply weren’t true.

  71. Daryl’s evidence remains plausible.

  72. daryl is hiding something

  73. great post Pup!!!

  74. wadduppp!!!! dicknecks!!

  75. the h2 – greeting dicknecks with bullwhips since your mom got carpal tunnel syndrome

  76. Good morning, Jam.

    Today is Knights of Columbus pancake breakfast, repairing rosaries, hopefully the last grocery run before Thanksgiving, decluttering, thawing the turkey, and repacking the bugout bags.

  77. Pat’s mad about it this morning. He didn’t really think about it last night. And yes. I’m sure. The friend obviously spun sort of tale – probably in explanation of why she broke up as friends with Erin. He “caught” three boys eating pizza – and acted like an ass. I can’t believe he GRILLED the one boy – Sam – about a ride home. You know – because they were obviously doing drugs or something and needed saving from our crack house.

  78. morning roamy!

  79. & to all the rest of you dicknecks, purveyors of crack, and assorted box jumpers

  80. the girls have some kind of soup kitchen duty today for girl scouts and honor society….
    sounds like double dipping the cred points to me….

  81. The funny thing is – the girl used to to drugs a lot but stopped when she was “besties” with Erin because erin doesn’t do a single drug and barely drinks. Occasionally she’d hang out with other people (some guy) and erin would worry she was going back to her old ways – which she probably was. I’m sure once they stopped being friends …

  82. ive got to spend a couple of hours shoveling snow that the village and my neighbor decided to push into the driveway…

    we’ve got more snow coming supposedly

  83. ” thawing the turkey “

  84. Ethan says that the dad wanted proof that the boy wasn’t hanging out with Erin. @@. I don’t know if that really explains it all. Why the grilling about driving the other boy home?

    I want a german shepherd. To keep the assholes away.

  85. I want a german shepherd. 12 gauge autoloader. To keep the assholes away.


  86. I just hope the dad didn’t get violent with him. He’s hit him in the past. Rather a lot.

  87. I want a german shepherd. To keep the assholes away.

    Have I got a deal for you.

  88. lol

  89. you could get attack geese

  90. i don’t get the whole beat your kid thing…
    at some point it’s got to dawn on you that they might grow teeth.

    and btw – if kid beater truly believes there is drugging / carousing / etc going on, why not call the cops?

    he’s a dick & probably needs to talk to someone in an alley some evening

  91. It was just super weird. I don’t know what that girl told her parents/dad. I’d like to have a few words with her, but it probably wouldn’t help. She’s trouble(d).

  92. Probably she’s been caught fucking up, and told Daddy that the reason she was into [whatever vice] was because of Erin.

  93. Moose made me do it!

  94. But yeah, distance and firewalls are your friends, not interference.

  95. Lauraw- I’m pretty sure that’s the deal.

  96. Along with a “I stopped hanging out with her so trust me now” deal.

  97. Brush With Death Story

    When I visit MA I like to return early before the traffic builds up and the trip takes longer. I woke up at 4:30, brushed my teeth and got my stuff together. After hugging my mom I headed out Rt 44 to 495 North. As I neared the junction with I 95 there was one other truck on the road ahead of me. It was still pitch black and for no apparent reason he jammed his brakes on and I immediately took my foot off the gas and looked for a deer or what have you on the side of the road. After seeing nothing my eyes returned to the road ahead. That’s when a car driving the wrong way drove past me going at least 75-80 mph. I was in the middle lane and the wrong way car was in the high speed lane and the road was curving so it wasn’t like they were visible way off. It was a few seconds before I realized what had happened and then I let loose with a series of curses and prayers.

    Happy to be alive and makin’ it rain $20’s

  98. I’m happy you’re alive too.

  99. Holy smokes! Glad you’re okay, Jimbro.

    That puts my rant about how forks need to be weighted differently (so they don’t always fly off the dish when you’re not eating at a table), into perspective.

    *washes and rinses fork*

    *wipes sauce off floor*

  100. Or, can there be one small magnetic area inside the flat part of fork, and one small magnet inside every flat plate, marked by a special flower in the china pattern, so you know to park the fork on that spot if you need to get up and take a walk with your plate.

    I don’t always have a heavy potato or something to shove the fork under/ into.

    This is really important and I don’t believe anybody has addressed this problem.

  101. I only told my mom that I made it home in one piece. Figured she didn’t need to hear that part. I reluctantly told Paula mainly because I knew it would lead to her reminding me I still don’t have a will despite her poking me about that for weeks now.

  102. I was also thinking about a raised notch on the edges of plates, that could be used to perch the fork and hold it, but I figure that would be the first thing to get chipped off with regular wear and stacking.

  103. If you leave too early the drunks are still out.

    Bars in NYC don’t close until 4 AM.

  104. Are you people still talking about Jimbro’s near death experience? I need you to focus on this other matter of great ponderous weighty significance. I can’t take three steps from the counter with a plate and fork without the fork taking a dive. This is bullshit. It’s almost 2019 and we are still bedeviled by this horror.

  105. I usually transport my fork in a pocket when I dine sans table. When putting the fork down while I pause to chew I’ll stab a hunk of meat or something similar as a counterweight. For the trip back to the sink the fork goes centered in the plate to keep it from falling. The downside is it’s covered with whatever residue is on the plate.

  106. This is really important and I don’t believe anybody has addressed this problem.

    Big Head Fork would be a good band name.

  107. I usually transport my fork in a pocket when I dine sans table. When putting the fork down while I pause to chew I’ll stab a hunk of meat or something similar as a counterweight. For the trip back to the sink the fork goes centered in the plate to keep it from falling. The downside is it’s covered with whatever residue is on the plate.

    No, no, no. This problem requires an industrial solution that consumes vast capital resources.

  108. Fork off.

  109. Hoverfork

  110. https://is.gd/BU9KD2

  111. Wow, all these years of simply putting the fork under my thumb when carrying a plate.

    I… I don’t know how I’ve been able to be so wrong for so long.

  112. https://tinyurl.com/yd64fsfa

  113. Just stick your fork in the hump. I thought you didn’t have feeling there?

  114. Thumb? THUMB?!


  115. But then you can get food on your thumb.

  116. Jimbro, glad you are okay. I would have needed new underwear.

    Pancake breakfast was good, but there was one woman who I’ve known for years, and she left me wondering about her sense of humor and whether she might have early Alzheimer’s. She knew from Facedouche that we had been to Israel, so she asked me while Mr. RFH was away from the table if we were going on the next pilgrimage, which is the Oberammergau Passion Play in 2020. I said no. So she waited until Mr. RFH had sat back down and said loudly and cheerily, “So I heard (Roamy) saying you’re going to Oberammergau!” and cackled. The joke might have worked better if she had pronounced it correctly, but I was mad that she told a baldfaced lie about what I’d said right in front of me, and Mr RFH didn’t know what the fuck Abbielummernow was, so she was the only one laughing, but she kept it up for kind of a long time. Then we were talking about mutual friends that she’s known for 20+ years, but she kept calling Keith Ken. That was weird.

    $20, to be spent on ginkgo biloba supplements.

  117. So you’re going? lol/falls on floor laughing

  118. /still laughing

  119. Can’t. Breath.

    /passes out

  120. whom I’ve known?

    Where’s Hotspur, he’ll know the grammar rule.

  121. LOL, Carin.

  122. Little Adam Schitt heh.


  123. Everybody must be thawing their turkeys.

  124. I’m just considering the physics of microwaving a whole turkey. Let’s just say I do not approve of the concept. At all.

  125. Was having dinner with Grammy and Grampy and my sis and brother-in-law and Possum’s cousin. Sister’s family is going to AZ for Thanksgiving, so this was our chance to see them before the trip.

  126. Just finished with mass and I’m waiting for the parking lot to clear.

  127. made a bear steak for dinner

  128. that little shitt dealio is funny.
    i like it when trump gets the proggies panties all a-bunch

  129. laura – i’ll send out a missive for you to design news. they have contests for new designs every once in a while, maybe they can get a bunch of desk jockeys to burn company time for your fork idea.

    also maybe roamy can get nasa to reallocate some of the muzzie outreach funds to look into this much more important project

  130. I went with the thumb earlier this evening. Worked pretty well.

    What about the thumb-less?

  131. Turkeys are 39 cents/pound at Hannaford’s. Limit of 4 birds. I’ll probably grab a couple for the freezer.

  132. Redskins head coach Jay Gruden on Alex Smith’s injury: “Yeah, he broke his tibia and his fibia”.

    He gets a pass since he’s a football coach. I’m merciless on the family practice residents when they call the fibula the fibia.

  133. I wonder what the turkey sale price will be on Friday.

  134. I used to get them at 20c a pound on Black Friday.

  135. Someone please just kill me now. Please.

  136. Teenagers?

  137. Customers?

    Teenaged Customers?

  138. Turkey needs thawing?

  139. Glad you’re ok, Jimbro.

  140. Not enough box jumps?

  141. Too many wall balls?

  142. She overnewfied.

  143. *makes garotte out of phone charging cord*

  144. She’s probably pregnant.

  145. I was stuck on the phone with my sister

  146. Made it home.

    Re. Roamie’s bad joke story……… I know a woman who will go to different groups at any gathering and try to stir up trouble. Goes to one guy “you know what that guy over there said about you?”. Then goes to the other guy and says another lie. Back and forth until she starts a fight. Crazy.

  147. Sound on, Scott.


  148. Missing Dad today. It would have been his 72nd birfday. We met Mom’s cousin and his wife for brunch at one of our favorite places and then went up to the cemetery to leave him some flowers.

  149. Here, Safeway takes all the frozen turkeys that don’t sell on turkey day and puts them back in the freezer ’till Christmas. The thawed ones get cheap.

  150. I think they do that here too, chrisp. Never get turkey sales anymore.

    My dad’s birthday is in November too, sean. *fistbump

  151. You should have seen the looks I got driving down the interstate this morning!

  152. Dry scrambled eggs are about as appealing as airport toilet paper.

  153. Hugs, Sean.

  154. Perfect

  155. Sean?


  156. One of these for J’Ames: https://is.gd/PlEfqY

    One of these for roamy: https://is.gd/Kt8yBs

    And I’m not sure how it smells, Peps. I chugged it pretty fast.

  157. Sorry, Sean.

  158. **raises a glass to Sean’s dad, since Sean can’t.

  159. Turkey sous vide, and smoked today. Tastes amazing.

  160. Sawright, Peps.

    Thanks, b-rad.

  161. What recipe did you use, Jay?

  162. I’m gonna start mine tomorrow.

    *Big hug to Cassidy*

  163. I used http://sousvideresources.com/2016/11/21/deconstructing-turkey/

    I belong to this group on facebook. He’s very authoritarian as far as posting, but there are some really good posts and examples.

  164. Awesome!! Thanks Imma check it out right now

  165. I used chef steps once, and it turned out great.

  166. Thanks, laura.

  167. I know the feeling. Two years and it isn’t any easier, honestly. The D doesn’t help, I’m sure.

  168. whaddupp dicknecks??!!!??

  169. 7 bells and allzwell.

  170. the weather bishes are saying 3 to 5 inches of snow today.
    im not liking this winter so far

  171. wakey wakey

  172. 15 min to MMM.

  173. Twitter just suggested I follow Jeff Flake. Oh hell no.

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