Erectioneering Tuesday

As we all know, 110% of the voting populace hate the evul teerump so we all need to buck up and follow the proggie game plan

Vote Early:

Vote Often:

 

“Jeffrey Wagner is reportedly running for mayor of Minneapolis, and he wants people to “wake the f**k up.”

Having pelosi back as speaker is gonna suck SSOOOOOOOO much….

the upside is we get to listening to my girlfriend Maxy H20 more – so there’s that.

 

Ahh-ite off to vote with all the poo-flinging fervor I can muster… you haters should too… fling poo that is.

 

143 Comments

  1. car in make sure you add this to the playlist:
    http://tinyurl.com/2fcpre6

  2. Listening to Hillary is nauseating, we dodged a major bullet (like that guy in Scott’s Bollywood video).

    I hope the Dems have the same feeling when Trump speaks that I do when I hear Hillary or Obama speak.

  3. I felt queasy voting because we could really be stupid here in Florida and get the socialist, Gillium as governor. DeSantis did not run a great campaign. Not enough saturation. On the other hand, Pinellas county is a dem county and he may not have wanted to waste resources here.

    Beasnwnsnsnsnsns, any flooring to the extreme color range (White, black or dark brown) will show EVERY SINGLE THING and be a monster to clean. I had dark wood flooring in my Texas house and I hated it so much because I could see stuff on it even after I just cleaned it.

  4. I miss Hillary.

    I wish she were around more.

    I think she’ll flirt with running until it’s obvious to her that people would prefer she take a dirt nap. And then a few months later she’ll decide not to run.

    Maybe.

    One more time?

    No?

    Sure?

    Ok then.

    Really?

    Maybe I’ll just try out Iowa?

    No?

    Ok.

    Fine.

    I get it.

    What about Fl? Maybe we do the old Giuliani strategy and bank it on Fl.

    Guys?

    Any interest?

    No?

    Ok I guess I’ll just go back to NY.

    But you know South Carolina is on the way.

    Lightning in a bottle?

    9th reset?

    Rerererererererererereintroduction?

    Guys?

    Anyone?

    No?

    Are you sure?

    I guess that’s ok.

  5. HA! Poor, stupid, shapeshifter, Hillary. She was this before that. Yes before no, heterosexual before homosexual.

    She’s a classic used up, sad politician of epic proportions.

  6. Should have stayed home and baked cookies.

  7. She could team up with some Russians.

  8. HA! Jimbro! Honestly, if she had stayed home and baked cookies and then sprung herself on the populace we would like her a lot more right now.

  9. Another book might help.

  10. Hillary, the sitcom.

  11. My gosh, sometimes I just sit back and reflect on the amazing fact that Donald Trump is our President.

  12. She’s not going to run again. She’s going to hint at running, build up a base of support, and use it to play kingmaker for the 2020 primary. The goal is to secure the support of whomever the Dem candidate is, ensuring that Clinton loyalists are given cushy influential jobs. This will allow the Clintons to work behind the scenes, keep money flowing into the Clinton Foundation.

  13. My gosh, sometimes I just sit back and reflect on the amazing fact that Donald Trump is our President.

    God has a special providence fools, drunks, and the United States of America.

  14. Hillzebub’s window was brief. 2008 she got beat for the nomination by…a newcomer. Despite her husband’s old machine backing her. Then in 2016 she got beat for the Presidency by…well, someone who’d never run for anything before! Despite her husband’s old machine, plus the power of a fully operational Deep State. Her window slammed shut that day.

    Anyway, the Clinton faction is on the outs as the True Believer Socialists complete the takeover of the party. She’ll peter out over the next couple of years before finally succumbing to any of the various ailments she’s been hiding all this time.

  15. Trump has seemingly endless energy (Low energy Jeb! Indeed!).
    I cannot believe the schedule he’s been following. And Trump doesn’t exactly have the best diet for energy and stamina. But whatever is pushing him, I sincerely thank him for his stumping for the candidates down the ticket.

  16. ok.
    so i voted once for each state…
    57 ballots cast

  17. Good job, JAM!!

  18. Nothing like waking up a 2AM to take care of problems you thought were yours, but turns out it’s somebody else’s problem altogether! And then uncover yet another undiscovered issue at 5 am!

    My life is great, and I’m the luckiest man alive.

  19. I listened to a podcast about Le Affair Monica last week and Hillary was of course featured on the famous 60 mins interview.

    She had a heavy Southern accent. It was hilarious.

  20. one of the douches that i know here locally is ostensibly a repube-ican:
    he’s got a sign in his lawn for the repub gov candidate (who has a better shot at winning power ball than the gov slot in nys) and a sign for the fucking nancy pelosi supporting piece of shit proggie that’s running for congress…

    ppl like him astound me – the moral superiority, the air of intellectual superiority, the convoluted thought processes…
    i respect avowed communists more than that guy.
    what a weasley fucking slimy turd

  21. what a weasley fucking slimy turd

    ——–

    Jam and mare are simpatico.

  22. Trump doesn’t drink. That goes a long way for his health and energy.

  23. HA! Unlike Hillary who was always battling face bloating and a hangover from drinky drinks.

  24. I’m amazed at the number of people on the right who have no clue about statistics, or science for that matter, but spout off as if they do. I would have expected it from the left, but the right is just as bad.

  25. DeSantis did not run a great campaign. Not enough saturation.

    DeSantis didn’t have the Soros, Steyers, and Bloomberg millions being thrown at him.

    mare, regarding floors, I don’t mind a whitish floor. My kitchen and bathroom floors are white and while they can show some dirt…they don’t show dust, like darker floors do. But then, we don’t wear shoes in the house. Clean up is no biggie.

  26. Floor color doesn’t matter, as long as the carpets match the drapes.

  27. My husband went to vote this morning about 8:00. Said there was a line out the door, so he’ll go back later today.
    I’ll probably go before I take MIL shopping per her usual afternoon time.

    Might be a large turnout this midterm because they have raising the minimum wage, weed, and McCaskill on the ballot. Seeing those three things together, makes me nervous.

  28. McCain is still dead, right?

    *That was for Hotspur.

  29. Any fake polling out there yet?

  30. We’re gonna go mid-afternoon, after the lunch crowd dies down.

    Baking cookies sounds like a good idea for today. Another rainy day on my day off.

    Gonna look up some paleo cookie ideas.

  31. Last night in Budapest. I am sad.

  32. laura if you find a good paleo cookie recipe would you be so kind as to poatate it?
    Purti prease with flying simians on top.

  33. No booze for a year and I’m two weeks into trying the paleo – keto dealio

  34. Turnout around here is YUGE.

    Bigger than 2016.

  35. I’m beginning to think my relative election calm is the welbutrin in action…

  36. give me some, cuz I’m chomping at the bit. Have to vote later also. Going to the basketball game, then following some returns.

    Hope I can sleep tonight.

  37. Turnout here is bigger than 2016 also. Well, at my precinct at least. Took 40 minutes start to finish, 2016 it took about 10.

  38. There are cars at all the little podunk voting stations around here. So I think that means a decent turnout. I had about a three minute wait

  39. There is usually no one but pole dancers when I go

  40. Obama’s anointment was a zoo. I’m pretty sure the local colleges were car pooling the gage (?) wearing punks around. Haven’t seen them since.

  41. 2010 was a good turn out. I actually took some elderly peeps out to vote.

  42. hotspot – you need to grab a couple of the budapestian server wenches by their hoo-haas.
    tell em trump said “hi”

  43. you clowns all bail to the h9 site?

  44. or are you grabbing ballots by the short hairs and letting dc know they’re our bitches

  45. Ohio

  46. did anyone remind carin that the key to a successful roadtrip starts with driving fast and taking chances?

  47. and amphetamines

  48. and depends™

  49. Comment by Car in on November 6, 2018 12:59 pm
    Ohio

    How far from Columbus?

  50. Comment by jam2 on November 6, 2018 1:01 pm
    and depends™

    This isn’t NASA.

  51. Apparently turnout here is huge too. I have no idea because I only live in a state for one election cycle.

    The last question on the ballot was a statewide initiative to move the selling of alcohol on Sunday from 12:30 to 11:30.

    The answer was YES.

  52. Always remember, 2016 november

  53. Been stuck in class and then crises all day. Did we lose yet/fail the national IQ test?

  54. Early voter here. Did it 2 weeks ago. I’m not sure how turn out is around here. Polling place is at a local school sort of tucked in the woods off a side street.

  55. oo oo oooo – CAR IN!!!!!

    CAAARRRRRRR IIINNNN!!!!
    add this to your playlist!!!

    http://tinyurl.com/y8xzytob

  56. did anyone remind carin that the key to a successful roadtrip starts with driving fast and taking chances?
    Comment by jam2 on November 6, 2018 1:01 pm
    and amphetamines
    Comment by jam2 on November 6, 2018 1:01 pm
    and depends™

    ——–
    hahhahhaaaa

    Mare loves Jam.

  57. The answer was YES.

    ——–

    No brainer, football starts at 12:00.

  58. Bout time for another baby post.

  59. ^^^^^YES^^^^^

  60. How about Thursday Emjay? Will it be ultrasound images or fully formed human pictures?

  61. https://msutoday.msu.edu/news/2018/teachers-and-trump/

    This is stupid.

    Neutral is bad for some reasons.
    Supporting Trump gets outrage from fellow teachers.
    Bashing Trump gets admiration from fellow teachers.

    Now give me some grant money and tenure.

  62. Some will be interpretive art, some will be of the normal muppetry type.

  63. Excellent, an extravaganza of imagination

  64. this may or may not be safe for work….
    so err on the whichever side of liking or not liking your job you stand/sit:
    http://tinyurl.com/ycln387h

  65. When does the crying start?

    * invents CSN *

    Crying Snowflake Network

  66. This really happened:

    I was chatting with our nanny yesterday and she told me that she used to work for a couple that had twin boys, 18 months. She started working for us because the couple got their kids into a private school for pre pre pre kindergarten. There’s a waiting list but they were able to secure two spots. Normally they only take 2 year olds. Their 18 month olds are very advanced and what not.

    WTF

    I’m teaching my 13 month old to laugh when he farts in the tub.

  67. *subscribes to CSN

  68. Comment by jam2 on November 6, 2018 1:45 pm
    this may or may not be safe for work….
    so err on the whichever side of liking or not liking your job you stand/sit:
    http://tinyurl.com/ycln387h

    ———

    WHY?????

  69. I was chatting with our nanny yesterday and she told me that she used to work for a couple that had twin boys, 18 months. She started working for us because the couple got their kids into a private school for pre pre pre kindergarten. There’s a waiting list but they were able to secure two spots. Normally they only take 2 year olds. Their 18 month olds are very advanced and what not.

    I was reading an article about the Harvard lawsuit, and how competitive it is to get into an Ivy. Teenagers spend their childhood crafting the perfect resume; grades, extracurriculars, volunteer activity, etc. It’s fucking insane.

  70. She started working for us because the couple got their kids into a private school for pre pre pre-kindergarten.

    ———

    They’ll have mommy or daddy issues. Guaranteed. Who do you think are the purple haired, rich daddy, gender studies stupes at the IVY’s?

  71. Is there another Muppet on the way? Hooray!

    We voted mid-morning. They said it had been busy all day. As we were leaving, an elderly gentleman using two canes came in with his daughter. She said that he was 97 years old. I said, “Great!”.

    It was quite inspiring.

  72. I still laugh when I fart in the tub.

  73. We voted. 1 person in front of us. NM is probably going to go full Lefty this time. The Dem woman running for Governor is Hillary-level annoying. 90+% chance she’ll win. Contest for Congress in my district is between a Trump Republican and an Ocasio-Cortez clone. When it looked like she had a chance, Dems dumped millions into the campaign and got some slick promoters in to help her. Non-stop ads.
    She’s full commie/socialist.

  74. Who among us doesn’t laugh after farting in Jay’s tub?

  75. Don’t worry, they will be safe

  76. Are we going to see Milo touring campaign headquarters tonight?

  77. Governor’s race here is going to be close.

    Last night during MNF for ever one D ad, there were 4 R ads.

    It’s now or never.

  78. Hey, Leon, is she doing this exercise correctly?

    https://tinyurl.com/y9ph33x2

  79. Are they really trying to get their kids into the Ivies, or are they just getting their kids out of their hair?

    Seriously, out here in the boonies I hear tales of mothers trying to get kids barely a year or two old into the Cub Scouts because they think it’s an every-day thing they can drop them off at and not deal with them.

  80. https://tinyurl.com/IMissCyn

  81. Are they really trying to get their kids into the Ivies, or are they just getting their kids out of their hair?

    It’s getting them into the ivies. The parents often have helicopter tendencies.

  82. No Pepe, I’m nowhere near her to give her ass slaps when she hits the top of the movement, so it can’t be right.

    I denounce myself.

  83. I like how she looks at her abs as if those two leg raises totally worked her abs!

  84. She’s showing off her abs correctly. If she generated some speed on the upswing we could toss the girls out of their hammocks pretty easily.

  85. my wife is trying to teach me not to laugh when i fart in the tub

  86. tub farting is probably a youtube thing

  87. tub farting is pronounced jacuzzi

  88. Did we lose yet/fail the national IQ test?

    Missouri may be on the verge of losing it. Three amendments regarding weed. Two medical marijuana and subsequent taxing thereof, the other would legalize for personal use. Also, minimum wage hike and one on creating another government office to gerrymander. I voted ‘no’ on everything. F*ckers.

    That has brought all of McCaskill’s dreadlocked, green-haired, many piercinged basement dwellers one does not normally see at a poll.

    My part of the county is deep red. Imagine what it’s like as you go closer in to the major cities. We may be f*cked.

  89. Interesting tidbit of useless info…one of my husband’s college teammates flew here from the lefty west coast for the reunion, this past weekend. He’s pretty socially liberal BUT, he’s totally against the legalization of weed as he saw the consequences during his EMT career. He, like me, will vote against it every time we see it on the ballot. Doesn’t understand why anyone would put it on the ballot as the properties used for medical treatment are extracted and put in pills or transdermal, etc.

  90. just looked at the RCP low down on my congress turd – showing a toss-up.

    claudia tenney (ostensibly a republican) has a FreedomWorks™ score of 45%.
    she’s a fucking toad.

    the state assembly piece of shit running against her is a stellar liar. he was taught by some of the best crooks that nys has to offer. he probably deserves a prison sentence not a congressional seat… i’ll be campaigning against him hard the next time. when i see tenney i’ll also let her know what an incredible lying piece of shit she is too –

    she epitomizes the unctuous rot that is the republican party – i detest them possibly more than the pelosi and reeds of the world due to their duplicity. there is no pit deep enough or fire hot enough in hell for what mcconnell and that smoking faggot from ohio and that shit sucking cowardly asswipe ryan and their horde have done these last few cycles.

    if The Troubles™ come before i die i will do my best to make it to their tribunal. fuckers

    tl/dr : monkeyboy is pissed

  91. These last few months have taught me a couple of things, Mitch McConnel actually has some balls…and an even bigger surprise? Lindsey Graham does too. Oh, I also learned that John McCain forever is a prick. Also, fighting injustice actually works. Kavanaugh fighting and speaking out on behalf of his stellar career and Godly life moved a lot of people.

    Unless I’m reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally off base, I think many R votes are coming out of the Kavanaugh hearings and how obviously the Dems were coordinating to ruin a man’s career for political reasons.

  92. I’m with you monkeyboy

    Had we not had the NeverTrump assholes heading both houses, we would have had that wall and many other things. You don’t see any of them f*ckers fighting for what they campaigned on. You only see Trump.

  93. That may be, Mare, but in Missouri…WE GOT WEED!! It draws all of the lefties out in droves.

  94. Overheard as I was standing in line, “I don’t know any of these names.”…from a young woman looking at the board that has all of the candidates and amendments listed. Her friend went down the list and told her who to vote for….all democrats.

    Why put two hot issues on a midterm ballot? A midterm where a disliked democrat senator is running for reelection.

  95. Recreational weed passed here in ’16 but LePage did a good job delaying it by looking at the obvious regulatory language missing from the citizens initiative. Same with expansion of Medicare. A Dem is likely to win the governorship this time around so it’s BOHICA time.

  96. 2016 there was a line out the door when the polls opened, this year I went at 11 and there were more poll workers than voters.

    Meh. This state sucks. I’m going to go nanny for MJ in Georgia.

  97. For Oso

  98. re: nanny duties

    mj probably has some sort of “i rub your felt you rub mine”, quid pro quo thing going on

  99. how in thee hell could trash pandas beat out space chimps…???!!!???

    that was rigged worse than a chicago erection

  100. travesty

  101. So my pessimistic streak has fired up today. I believe the blue areas will be more blue and the red areas will be more red. That means Connecticut is gonna double down on stupid and elect Ned Lamont, another tax-and-spend, punisher of the middleclass for Governor. My idea is that so many conservatives have left the state there are not enough of us left to override the welfare and civil servant classes.

  102. We shall see.

  103. 🚀🏙🗑🐼⚾️

  104. We early voted. Pepe is right about NM. I H8 MLG. I think Ben Gay, The Sober Indian, and the Southern Commie will win. Hindlick, too.

  105. The only election coverage I’ve seen is today is The Five. At the end of the show they went around and asked for predictions. Most picked GOP Senate and Dem House. The most spot on prediction was the woman (Maybe Laura Ingraham?) who said “Regardless of what happens, it will be billed as a repudiation of Trump by the media” or words to that effect. I think she’s right.

  106. Trump resistance 👌🏻

  107. Dan is making chicken and acorn squash. Chicken carcass will be cooked down for broth. Results coming in. I’m watching Graham Norton shows on YouTube.

  108. tim caine & bernie

  109. I hope John James wins. I’m in Tenn

  110. I’m on tenterhooks about the CT governor race. A Lamont win will be devastating.`But expected.

  111. I’m gonna try not to watch the numbers come in. Too many coming out for weed and telling business owners what to pay their no-skill employees.

  112. CNN is starting to sense that they are losing Florida.

  113. Season 4 of Narcos drops this week. Dan told me no spoilers. I’m still pissed that people don’t know his name.

  114. I’ll watch numbers in the AM. Acorn squash and Le Crueset 🐥 for dinner.

  115. OK, who of you jokers knew about wasabi & soy sauce almonds and didn’t tell me??

  116. Wasn’t me. Thanks to Lauraw, I have addicted people to ginger snaps and sharp cheddar. OMG. We are testing other cheeses. Asiago is at bat.

  117. We all knew. We had meetings about how to keep it secret.

  118. I’m still hiding my other two boxes of maple candies from myself, don’t look at me…

  119. I had acorn squash stuffed with maple-cured sassage for today’s lone meal.

  120. Maple Candies at Cost Plus. We’re setting Christmas baskets for ourselves.

  121. MENTAL DISORDER!!!!!!

  122. Mare, how do you describe Lychee to someone who has never had fresh Lychee?

  123. I’ve had canned lychee. It’s squeaky.

  124. G’night y’all. Watching John Wick.

  125. Haven’t had gingersnaps & cheddar in years! So good. Especially with really spicy gingersnaps. I need to find a paleo substitute for them snaps.

  126. goodnight crazybear

  127. Lauraw, It is. Grape like, in texture, but sweeter.

  128. I had Lychee sorbet at Lappert’s. Lychee at Uncle’s Shaved Ice. I guess CONUS peeps are unfamiliar with Lychee. Li Hung Mi beyotch

  129. Checking out. John Wick Movies.

  130. I remember maple sugar candies, from many years ago, that were shaped like maple leaves. They were rare and wonderful…

  131. Gah, can’t stand Rove any more.

  132. GOPe Rove sucks donkey balls. Part of the resistance.

  133. And Juan Williams beating the racism drum is tiring.

  134. Hawley kicking McCaskill. She’ll get all of St Louis though.

  135. Love you guys, but John Wick

  136. wow, they called Hawley over McCaskill

  137. Meet Nacho

  138. Menendez wins again in Jersey. Wow.

  139. That’s what I got, ChrisP. Amazon Prime, free shipping, the good stuff that uses real maple syrup.

    Pricey, but dear God, worth it.

    (And fuck NJ, but we knew that would happen.)

  140. How does Juan Williams feel about James getting beaten by Stabenow? Or is James not the right kind of black politician?

  141. you already know the answer, TiFW

  142. Some writers have so confounded society with government, as to leave little or no distinction between them; whereas they are not only different, but have different origins. Society is produced by our wants and government by our wickedness; the former promotes our happiness positively by uniting our affections, the latter negatively by restraining our vices. The one encourages intercourse, the other creates distinctions. The first is a patron, the last a punisher.

    Society in every state is a blessing, but government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil; in its worst state an intolerable one: for when we suffer, or are exposed to the same miseries by a government, which we might expect in a country without government, our calamity is heightened by reflecting that we furnish the means by which we suffer. Government, like dress, is the badge of lost innocence; the palaces of kings are built upon the ruins of the bowers of paradise. For were the impulses of conscience clear, uniform and irresistibly obeyed, man would need no other law-giver; but that not being the case, he finds it necessary to surrender up a part of his property to furnish means for the protection of the rest; and this he is induced to do by the same prudence which in every other case advises him, out of two evils to choose the least. Wherefore, security being the true design and end of government, it unanswerably follows that whatever form thereof appears most likely to ensure it to us, with the least expence and greatest benefit, is derp to all others.


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