The Way You Smell

Leon was the inspiration for the topic.








  1. Crazy Lady smells like sausage.

  2. Worst Cologne Names:


  3. Squats


  5. Failure.

  6. wakey wakey

  7. Needy

  8. OFB

  9. Cod

  10. I’m never signing up for the open again. I get so stupidly nervous. I don’t need the added stress in my life.

  11. Crack

  12. OPP

  13. Nervous Sweat

  14. Dumpster Fire

  15. Clydesdale.

  16. Clydesdale

  17. goddammit


  18. FUPA, by Roseanne

  19. Daddy’s Fingers

  20. DANG. how did we both come up with that?

  21. Aging Couger

  22. Taint of Love, by Barack Obama

  23. Queens

  24. Clogged for Men

  25. Bitterness By Joy Behar

  26. Gender Fluid

  27. Skank by Lena Dunham


  29. Ficus by Harvey Weinstein (for men)

  30. Young and Costly by Anthony Weiner

  31. Pu$$y, by Amy Schumer

  32. In the Woods by Hillary Clinton

  33. Huma by Hillary Clinton


  34. Barn Cat

  35. Belch by Michael Moore

  36. Mare, did you see the cat watching the horror movie?
    6:20 PM yesterday.

    That video was made for you.

  37. Supple by Kevin Spacey

  38. I LOVED that video, Scott. I wonder what he was really watching?

  39. The Oscars.

  40. Faithful by Tiger Woods

  41. Heh, If that cat could eat popcorn at the stupidity of them, I’d believe it.

  42. Cordite by Dana Loesch


  44. Shartooze by Taco Bell

  45. i worked at 2 different flavor and fragrance places for a few years –
    can’t stand to be around perfumes now.
    i’d almost rather be around BO

  46. First cancellation for tomorrow.

    Dammit, there it goes, it’ll never sell now.

  47. Flopsweat by Barack Obama

  48. I want to sniff Dana’s cordite.

  49. Sauerkraut Seduction

    (someone had sauerkraut in their lunch, someone else reported it as a gas leak, and the building was evacuated.)

  50. That Sauvage commercial with Depp is such a laugh-out-loud stupidest thing. Makes him look even more ridiculous than usual.

  51. Well, technically sauerkraut does produce gas leaks.

    Propane by Hank Hill


  53. Skanky Porn Tits by Pupster

  54. J’Ames?


  56. Dairy Farm – it’s a rather earthy fragrance

  57. Crazy Aunt Tilly – Features a top note of cat urine

  58. Hairy Ass

  59. Cordite by Dana Loesch

    I’d buy it.

    Skanky Porn Tits by Pupster

    Again, yes. Are the rules too hard for this game?

    Night Nurse

  60. Septic

  61. Free Straw


  63. Chloroform by xbrad

  64. Clam Steam

  65. Infected

  66. Suppuration

  67. Musty Felt: Body Spray And Personal Lubricant

  68. “Dammit, there it goes, it’ll never sell now.”

    hahaha –

  69. I’m going to be stuck with 2 houses and 34 acres spread across southern MI.

  70. I never had six showings in a week, much less the first week. Relax curly.

  71. Not enough flame thrower.

  72. I doubt it, Leon. But I can think of worse problems to have.

  73. Start your morning right with “Napalm”

  74. Do they still do a gun thread over at Ace’s? If so, is it today of Sunday?
    I’m trying to get to the local store/range this coming week to try out and decide on a first pistols.

  75. For Car in and Leon.

  76. While the rest of the nation spends $15 on an ordinary chicken at their local feed store, Silicon Valley residents might spend more than $350 for one heritage breed, a designation for rare, nonindustrial birds with genetic li

    I spend about $2 a bird.

  77. Oh shit,

    “My timber framed, Gingerbread coop is gorgeous: wired for electrical, plumbed for water, incorporating vintage windows and doors,” Laura Menard, a proud owner from an upscale Silicon Valley suburb, noted over email.

    Can’t. Stop. Laughing.

  78. *whacks Leon on the head*

    Lighten the F*** up, dude – it hasn’t been a week yet. You’re going to stroke out or have a heart attack. Take a deep breath and try to not obsess about this. Trust me, Possum is paying attention – the last thing you want to do is model anxiety.

  79. I had to stop reading right here:

    …with exorbitant veterinarian bills and a steady diet of organic salmon, watermelon and steak.

  80. I’m being overdramatic to entertain you people*. We already have 2 verbal offers and a third who said they’d make a cash one if we said we had another.

    *yes, you

  81. Xbradtc, considering his parents’ admission they knew he was in communication with WikiLeaks I’m more convinced than ever Seth RIch was not a victim of a “failed robbery.”

  82. Leon,
    Real-Estate is so crazy here, that people get into bidding wars. A place listed for $750k might go for $1 million.
    A little place like ours (4 acre), could list for $350 and go for $500k…

  83. Formal gun thread is Sundays. Informal gun threads can break out at any time with little notice, like a summer storm or your mom’s “condition”.

  84. Silicon Valley Chicken Farmers


    #. At least they’re employing other people for their faux farming

    &. Could be a worse trend, like fucking expensive chickens rather than just keeping them for eggs

    z. Maybe one of their kids will take up real farming someday inspired by their parents’ folly

  85. Three more colors tried today. Gotta wait until they dry to see what looks good. One went on looking a little like sludge, but it’s drying nice.

  86. Crossfit open 18.2 – went ok. I’m not unhappy with my performance, but unless I wake up really sore tomorrow I’m going to redo on Monday.

    Diet is going well.

  87. My diet has gone to hell, but I’m trying to get back on a regular gym schedule. I missed my workout Friday because I forgot my gym clothes at home (my gym is three blocks from my office, which is an hour’s commute from home), so I’ll probably go in tomorrow, after I do some work.

  88. CoAlex, I have money on the line. I think the jackpot is around $200.

  89. Sludge by Michael Moore.

  90. Moommmmmmmm ! leon’s trolling again

  91. that chicken shit is friggen funny

  92. brought to us by the same peeps that want to lecture us on conservation

  93. “&.”

    that’ll be next

  94. one of jimesezez’s comments lasterdaynight got me thinking ” what ever happened to trigglypuff”

  95. Tantrum – by trigglypuff

  96. MoistFolds – the lovechild by Moore&Puff

  97. Thanks, BC.
    I hardly ever go there anymore, but I’ll probably look for it tomorrow. If I’m feeling punchy tonight, I may check out the ONT and look for Jim.

    I know that everyone is an expert and opinions are like assholes, so everything with a grain of salt…
    But, it’d be nice to hear from some that have experience that aren’t random YouTube strangers.

  98. i started using that hoover zoom thing: i’ve been raffing like an idiot each time it passes over the avatards…

    scotts’ is really deranged and carinszez’ is perfect and now i see what sir jimmies actually be

  99. Midnight Shart

  100. Midnight Shart

    Brought to you by Al Roker

  101. Two verbal, one more likely to follow, and there are 4 more showings today.

    I think we’ll do okay.

  102. ChiChi,

    I’m not a gun expert. I have opinions, and I will share if you like. The most important thing is what you want your firearm for, proper fit in your hand, and willingness to practice.

    I purchased my first handguns 24 years ago, so the landscape was a little different, it was President Clinton and the “Assault Weapons Ban” then. Gun dealers were being demonized along with the NRA and hunters. Oh, wait…pretty much exactly the same thing as now without as many school shootings.

    Hi capacity magazines were the focus, along with guns that looked scary. I bought a Smith and Wesson revolver for Mrs. Pupster, which fits her hand really nice, and she is deadly accurate with it at 10 -15 yards:

    And I got this for me, which I am ashamed to say I have never really shot that well, but it came with 2 fifteen round magazines which was my primary attraction:

    Not exactly like that but you get the idea. Go to a range that has rentals or with a friend that has some knowledge and try some things out, get something that feels comfortable in your hand, points naturally, and is not very complicated to operate.

  103. “…the spitting image of the Beretta Model 92FS…”

    It’s like they read my mind.

    Can’t go wrong with a S&W revolver in .38 or .357

  104. Thanks so much, pups!
    I want personal + home protection. Comfortable, reliable, preferably cheap, easy to clean.

    There is a shop/range 2 miles from home with a superb reputation that I’ll hopefully be visiting where I can rent. Been doing my research (too much?), and while I want to spend less, I think I’m already in love with the CZ P10C without even holding one. I’ll probably check out the Smith M&P 2.0 as well. More than I want to spend, but maybe they will show me a sub-$300 alternative??


  105. Depends what you are doing with it.

    I wanted something I could conceal so size and caliber brought it down to a handful of choices.

  106. “Yoga-loving-mom-does-headstand-breastfeeding-daughter”
    and beat THAT you zumba freaks

    probably not safe for work – but pretty odd
    the video autoplayed when i clicked on the article

  107. size matters?

  108. refresh

  109. Concealed isn’t my first concern, but will be a factor in the future.*
    That’s why I’m looking at the compact platform. I just think a subcompact will be too small for my hands.
    And, I’m not opposed to a nice wheelgun, either, btw, but want higher capacity.

    *VA requires a fee for CCP, which I oppose on principle, so I MAY carry openly at first. Not quite sure yet…

  110. Wait, is that a newfangled Shield?

    S&W Shield was my first choice, but they were sold out and nobody knew when they would see them again.

  111. I was listen to the radio last week on a home improvement show. They had an exterminator on. He said one of their main calls now is rats due to chicken coops.

  112. Yoga pose is called Inverted Cow Position

  113. Yes sir. The 2.0 is the newest shield, aka Shield 2.0.
    Check out YouTube vids on the CZ, though…

  114. CZ has a solid reputation.

  115. I need someone to come over and help me with paint colors.

  116. I heard this story on NPR as I drove into work yesterday. It was breathlessly reported and gives some insight into their desperation to bring Trump down

    tl/dr: A Russian guy is an NRA fanboi and this attempts to make a connection between 3 of the libs hated groups: Trump, Russia and the NRA.

    I was lol’ing as I rolled down the road

  117. I settled for a Ruger LC-9. It’s almost the exact same size and weight and it was about $100 cheaper.

  118. I’m not that familiar with striker-fired chi chi. I’m kind of partial to old school hammers.

    If you have time and the counter person has the inclination, you should probably ask if you could take it apart for cleaning and have them show you how it’s done. What is great about revolvers is their simplicity and ease of maintenance. It’s nice to twice as many rounds though I guess.

    Have fun, good luck.

  119. These are some damn strange chickens:

  120. I was listen to the radio last week on a home improvement show. They had an exterminator on. He said one of their main calls now is rats due to chicken coops.

    Not surprising. There’s a reason why massive gardens/keeping animals is restricted in many suburban/urban areas.

  121. CZ has a solid reputation.

    Unlike your mom.

  122. Glock G19, or G43 if you want it really small.

    I tend to avoid the really small guns. They are harder to shoot, and by having a shorter and lighter slide, the slide moves faster when fired so the window for cycling the action is shorter. Tons of problems with short 1911s.

  123. so I MAY carry openly at first. Not quite sure yet…

    I’m not a fan, most open carry people that I have met and interacted with are zealots inviting trouble to argue about their rights, with the exception of the guys that run the gun shops and ranges. The reaction of the public, right or wrong, is mostly negative, and law enforcement the same. I mean no offence. I just don’t think the added security benefit outways the negative consequences.

    Again, opinions are like assholes. You do you, Chi.

  124. Thanks, Monsieur LePew.
    I think the CZ P10C that I’m eyeing has been billed as the gen 5 G19 killer. Basically a better, smoother shooting knockoff for $150 less.
    But I thought that they’re more “medium” sized? Not super small.
    Not sub-compact (my hands wouldn’t like those) and not full sized. Billed as all around great, reliable shooters that are also suitable for carry…

    I guess I won’t know until I get my nickels together and get down to the shop.

  125. LOL When I turned 50 I decided to buy the biggest baddest handgun I could find. I bought a Desert Eagle .44mag. What a mistake. It’s huge, heavy, and loud. No fun to shoot, but I think just the sight of it would scare off any home invader.

  126. Believe me, Pups – I’m smelling what you’re stepping in. That’s why I said I MAY open carry. I have a big problem with the state charging me $100 and putting me on a govt list for the privilege of CC, but maybe a bigger problem with the “open carry” crowd walking down the street with an AR strapped across their chest (legal and smart do not have to be mutually exclusive!).

    So far, the guys I’ve seen open carrying a sidearm have never caused one bit of public concern here. Most people either don’t have a scintilla of situational awareness, or assume he’s an off-duty cop, I guess?

    Time, experience, and more opinions (like yours) will shape my decision, I’m sure.

  127. I would open carry on my land or near it.

  128. I just watched a movie on Prime called Logan Lucky. I can’t believe I had never heard of this movie, it’s got a lot of big names and was a really fun watch. Oceans Eleven with Hillbillies. Good stuff.


  130. Exactly how I thought about Lucky Number Slevin, Pups. “How have I never heard of this fun flick before?!?” Packed with big name stars.

    Looks like Logan Lucky got panned on IMDB but still got a really solid rating somehow. I’ll have to keep my eyes open for it.

  131. Looks good

  132. I’d watch that. There was a promoted trailer for the new movie coming out called Red Sparrow.

    One critic tweeted a summary as “Jennifer Lawrence goes to whore school and learns to pick locks”. In the trailer they had the standard trope of women beating up well trained, physically fit men. Eh, tits.

  133. Whore School is a surprisingly subtle and elegant fragrance.

  134. We got an offer. $600 over asking, inspection waived, contingent on the closing of their house (already scheduled for mid March), and we can occupy for up to 30 days after closing, pro-rated.

    I’m going to wake up soon mad it’s going to really suck.

  135. Mad->and. Even in dreams autocucumber blows.

  136. sweet deal bruh!

  137. you pulled it out –
    another hour or so and it all would have fallen apart

  138. If their closing falls apart in 6 weeks, how much do they pay you?

  139. We get their earnest money free and clear, and the other people who were planning to make an offer on Monday get a phone call.

  140. If their closing falls apart in 6 weeks

  141. Oops. We watched Logan Lucky awhile back. Dan likes “Caper” movies, so I have to watch a bunch of heist flicks. Plus he watches The Great Escape at least once a year. 😜

  142. Watching evil, racist, white male patriarchy, NRA masturbation pic tomorrow: Death Wish.

  143. Fingers crossed for you, leon.

  144. I’m watching The Tick on Amazon Prime. I’m kinda turned on by Ms. Lint.

  145. Riley Keough is super sexy in Logan Lucky. I just found out she is Elvis’ granddaughter.

  146. Oh and Chi…she wears white cowboy boots and a miniskirt for most of the movie. I thought you’d want to know.

  147. Oh yes. She has the requisite trashy tatoos, plus what looks like a collapsible fishing rod tucked in her boot – I’d take her home to meet Mom.

  148. I think that’s a transmitter of some sort tucked into her boot. It looks like she’s wired up with a small microphone hidden on her.

  149. Forget meeting mom, I’d take her to the bar and invite dad to come out and meet her.


  151. I can’t stop laughing at that. He really looks like he’s running for his life there at the end.

  152. In the end, he just died tired.

  153. Rats!!! PJ really needs to see that 😜

  154. I think old people smell like soup. Mostly chicken noodle. Mostly

  155. Dan made a peppery ham and potato soup. I H8 soup. Waiting for the sourdough to be done. Mmmmm…bread.

  156. He evidently had no need of gap for the foreseeable future.

  157. Angry Unicorn is a terrible cologne name.

  158. Hey Oso, did you recognize the guy who played the warden in Logan Lucky?

    Don’t give it away. I thought it was Clint Howard but I was wrong.

  159. Pups,
    How could you not?

  160. How could I not what?

    Smell Like Soup?

    I grilled hamburgers today, standing on compacted snow and ice wearing a t-shirt. I smell like charcoal.

  161. I did. I’ve seen every Jason Statham movie.Not proud of that. I was pleasantly surprised by Driver. I H8 him as Kylo Ren. Still not sure how Han and Leia could birth that…👋🏻

  162. Sourdough was from Sprouts. Yoga pants Sprouts not hippie

  163. Watch Silence sometime, oso. He’s actually really good in that. As is Andrew Garfield.

  164. I liked Garfield as Spider-Man. Team Gwen for over 40 years. Never liked Mary Jane. Thanks. We’re trying to figure out Amazon on Apple TV.

  165. I H8 revolving doors. Vegas gives a stationary door option. Albuquerque airport sucks. In order to exit, you get three revolving doors. That’s it. Dan enjoys watching me freak out.

  166. Freaking out for no reason. Good night

  167. When she went, “hey love come over”
    My derp abounds
    Oh the feeling
    And she wept “hold me again”, I made no sound
    Oh, the beating
    And she swore love is never done
    So easily
    And we went over again, my derp abounds
    Oh, the feeling

  168. camaro

  169. Anybody do bullet journaling? I usually have a list of long and short term crap to do and projects going at all times, but it would be nice to have it more organized and less cumbersome to run down the line.

    It’s kind of ridiculous that somebody with so little of importance going on in their life spends so much time administering a game plan. My notebook is ridiculous. Repetitive. But I’m terrified of forgetting to do stuff.

    I think I’m going to set one up today and see how it feels using it.

  170. The ‘construction fails’ from last night’s ONT is cracking me up pretty good. Hard to believe some of them could have possibly been honest accidents.

  171. Anybody do bullet journaling?

    You mean, like a hit list?

    Not on paper.

  172. Man. you’re paranoid. Planning requires a system of organization.

    Think of the possibilities for creating an alibi years in the making.

  173. Late to the party. Chi. Former instructor type here, law enforcement handgun & shotgun. Pupster hit it perfectly, its about “fit” (which equals accuracy) and control (ability to recover from firing). All things considered, go wit 9mm, the ballistics on modern 9mm are excellent. You could consider a 40 cal, but the diff between 40 and 9 are negligible but the 40 is “snappier” and needs more control to recover sight picture after firing first round.

    I carry a full size Springfield XD everyday and I’m not a “big guy”. I prefer Springfield for the back strap safety. I’m not a fan of any 92f pattern handgun because the grip is too big. I would examine

    Springfield XD series
    Smith & Wesson M & P series

    Forget about open carry, unless yer in yer yard posturing for the neighborhood. Outside of that or hiking in the woods its tactically deficient.

    If you want to talk live, let me know, and i’ll be happy to talk with you this evening. I’m not the end all super instructor or anything like that, I just carried professionally for 15 yrs and taught same for two years.

  174. i’ve got an autonomous list

  175. Can someone please release the comment I made that’s stuck in comment purgatory? Please and Thank you.

  176. done

  177. Well, crap, Troy.
    Why did you not mention the CZ in that rant? I haven’t touched it yet, but already want it…

  178. Not to muddy the waters further, but this new offering by Ruger seems promising:


  180. We like our Ruger LC9s. Little small for Scott’s big paws, I would say though.

  181. I do bullet to-do lists most mornings, Laura, or did until I started just keeping them in my head. I still write them out if I know I’ve got a stack of distractions coming.

  182. Dammit. Now I have to add that ecp to the “lokkyloo” list.
    I have a $50 Darden gift card, so I’m taking a buddy to Red Lobster or Longhorn Steakhouse for lunch. His choice.
    Either way, we have to drive by the shop, so I may stop by to check policies & prices. And see what is available to rent, of course.

    That speech by my state delegate was so triggering! (Pun definitely intended)

  183. I tried making a “to do” list. It was supposed to help you feel in control and like you were making progress when you crossed something off. I started writing things down, but by the time I got to page #4, I got depressed, tossed it and ate a cookie.

  184. Laura, I have a whiteboard at work with my to-do list, and I have a paper list at home of the dishes I’m going to cook today to have dinner for at least the next three days.

  185. I used to make a daily list, but I found that the only way I could feel like I was making any progress on it was to add shit that was easy to accomplish.
    Like “put on pants” – some days, even THAT didn’t get crossed off the list.

  186. I don’t write anything down.

    My brain gets lazy if I do.

  187. “Jennifer Lawrence goes to whore school and learns to pick locks”

    Pretty sure the uniforms in whore school are sleazy as shit.

  188. I took a memory training seminar many moons ago. It was pretty cool.

    With a little practice I can memorize up to 20 items in under a minute, and retain it for a long long time.

    If you use this method enough it is supposed to be easy to increase that number by a factor of 10.

  189. I didn’t mention the CZ cause I have no practical experience with the platform, I know them by reputation (mostly good) and I’ve held one onct or twice.
    I can tell you this, defensive handgunning is its own shooting specialty that starts with fit and ability to control. After that, reliability is the key. Consider it a “work gun”, its just a tool in your self defense tool box. Treat it and expect it to perform like you would your hammer.

  190. I remember your mom’s phone number.

  191. wakey wakey

    I liked Garfield as Spider-Man.

    My son and I go round and round on this.

  192. Do you remember the name of the seminar?

  193. Whiteboards are awful for lefties

  194. I’ve heard of bullet journals but really didn’t know WTF they were. So I watched a video. It’s about 5 minutes long and before he hit the 2 minute mark my mind was wandering.

    I’ll stick with scraps of paper and sticky notes to remember my to do list if it’s more than a few items.

  195. I image searched bullet journal and from the looks of the images shown it’s a hobby for bored millennials hanging around coffee shops wondering why they’re in debt and out of work after their 6 year bachelor’s degree in women’s studies.

    Scrapbooking with colored markers

  196. Comment by Pendejo on March 4, 2018 9:59 am
    I remember your mom’s phone number.



  197. FOR TODAY:

    -get a bullet journal

    /lose to-do list

  198. Scrapbooking with colored markers

    Ooooh … there’s colored markers?!!??

  199. I don’t remember, Leon. It was about 30 years ago.

    Check out Ron White, if he’s not a fraud it looks like his course is similar.

  200. it’s a hobby for bored millennials hanging around coffee shops wondering why they’re in debt and out of work after their 6 year bachelor’s degree in women’s studies.

    Work,’as bad as it sucks sometimes, beats the hell out of living the daily existence of some of these pathetic fucks.


    I made frittatas last Friday, salmon patties the Friday before. You would have to hold a gun to my head for me to make lima loaf, and I like lima beans. That’s just wrong.

  202. Comment by Pendejo on March 4, 2018 9:59 am
    I remember your mom’s phone number.

    If you forget it, you can find it in most truck stop bathrooms.

  203. I made a Lima loaf once.
    I wouldnt recommend it. I had to call a plumber afterwards to clean out the drain…

  204. That was great Roamy. There was a time when advertiser actually used the word “Lent” in their print advertisements.

  205. Poopy.
    Mike chose Olive Garden for lunch. Meh. I can have a lot of salad & bread sticks, a little spaghetti, and a bunch of wine for lunch.

  206. It’s harder this Lent because I’m doing the low-carb diet. That cuts out fettucini alfredo, blushing bunny, pierogies, and cheese pizza.

  207. I work on fridays, so I just eat eggs and salad. Haven’t had to make food. Pat just buys the kids pizza w/o meat.

    The first friday, I made fried fish.

  208. I’m doing low carb, no sugar right now. One week in. Also IF on most days – (if I eat passed a certain time I lose points for the day). Some days it’s unavoidable.

  209. I don’t think I could survive without pierogies in my diet rotation. They are a staple. I could sooner give up breathing.

  210. I’ve had maybe one pierogie in my life. Maybe two.

  211. And you live in Michigan?
    I thought bratwurst, pierogies and sauerkraut was a way of life up there. With Vernor’s, of course.

  212. It’s Pasties up in the UP (and upper part of the mitten) that’s a thing. Detroit does have/did have a large Polish community. I’ve just never been a big eater of them.

  213. What the heck is going on by you Leon:

    “Sumpter and Willis neighbor’s please be aware that low life people are dumping dogs dead and alive on our streets. Last week a dog was found dead on McKean strangled to death also believe it was used for fighting poor thing still had the rope around it’s neck…ugh… Then last night on Bemis a dog and 2 puppies was left in a cage on the side of the road. This needs to stop so please if anyone knows of anyone fighting dogs or neglecting them please turn them in to police. All animals want is to be loved and we need to be their voices.. Again please keep your eyes open for these idiots we can’t let them get away with harming innocent animals”

  214. Haven’t heard anything about it, Carin. I doubt it’s a real pattern. Worst we usually get is some summertime drag racing.

  215. Also, apostrophe abuse.

  216. Lima Loaf

  217. Never eaten a pasty. I have had pierogies but don’t know why anyone would.

  218. I love pierogies, but my sister going on insulin for diabetes was a wakeup call. There’s no family history of diabetes, so it’s related to obesity. I’m on Mark Sisson’s Keto Reset Diet and have lost 16 lbs. since Christmas. It would have been 17 except for the visit to Dad’s – no such thing as low-carb for Dad. Seeing actual progress is pretty good motivation to keep skipping the bread, pasta, and potatoes, though Mr. RFH eats potato chips loudly while sitting next to me on the couch.

  219. Is everyone here on a diet?

  220. I’m on the “your mom” diet.

  221. I just retrieved an earring for a sink trap.

    Zero trips to Home Depot.

    Me Shitty old house
    1 0

  222. for = from

  223. I’ve been off my diet since Thursday. I can’t use my kitchen until after the last showing tonight, and fasting while solo dad is disaster in the making.

  224. Is everyone here on a diet?

    What is it you’re implying?

  225. Netflix watchers, give Battle Creek a try. fun little series with lots of big names.

  226. I watched Battle Creek about a year ago. Shame that the show was canceled.

  227. Death Wish was fun, but gory. Trailer for Hurricane Heist. Dan and I laughed through the trailer and he assured me he has no interest in watching. Not even on Redbox with a free movie coupon.

  228. Mrs. Pupster and I are working through Fargo Season 1, I’ve seen it but it’s new to her. I have not seen season 3 so no spoilers. I told her she wouldn’t enjoy it as much if we had never moved to southern canada donchano.

    I’m glad to see Mr. Willis get a decent action flick, even if it is a remake. I’m just going to have to say it, Charles Bronson was always just creepy not badass in his movies minus the westerns. And The Dirty Dozen.

  229. Speaking of southern Canada… (cheerfully stolen from Faceplant)


    If you are travelin soon, consider Lutran Air, the no-frills airline. You’re all in da same boat on Lutran Air, here flyin is a upliftin experience:

    – Dair is no first class on any Lutran Air flight.

    – Meals are potluck. Rows 1 tru 6, bring rolls; 7 tru 15, bring a salad; 16 tru 21, a hot dish, and 22-30, a dessert.

    – Basses and tenors please sit in da rear of da aircraft.

    – Everyone is responsible for his or her own baggage.

    – All fares are by free will offering, and da plane will not land til da budget is met.

    – Pay attention to your flight attendant, who vill acquaint you wit da safety system aboard dis Lutran Air.

    Okay den, listen up; I’m only gonna say dis vonce: In da event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, I am frankly gonna be real surprised and so vill Captain Olson, because ve fly right around two tousand feet, so loss of cabin pressure would probably mean da Second Coming or someting of dat nature, and I wouldn’t bodder with doze liddle masks on da rubber tu bes–you’re gonna have bigger tings to worry about den dat. Just stuff doze back up in dair liddle holes.

    Probably da masks fell out because of turbulence which, to be honest wit you, we’re gonna have quite a bit of at two tousand feet, sorta like driving across a plowed field, but after a while you get used to it. In da event of a water landing, I’d say forget it.

    Start saying da Lord’s Prayer and just hope you get to da part about forgive us our sins as we forgive dose who sin against us, which some people say ‘trespass against us,’ which isn’t right, but what can you do?

    Da use of cell phones on da plane is strictly forbidden, not because day may confuse da plane’s navigation system, which is by da pants all da way. No, it’s because cell phones are a pain in da wazoo, and if God had meant you to use a cell phone, He wudda put your mout on da side of your head.

    We start lunch right about noon and it’s buffet style wit da coffeepot up front. Den we’ll have da hymn sing; hymnals are in da seat pockets in front of you. Don’t take yours wit you when you go or I am gonna be real upset and I am NOT kiddin!

    Right now I’ll say Grace: Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest and let deze gifts to us be blessed. Fader, Son, and Holy Ghost, May we land in Dulut or pretty close.

  230. Last showing of the day is happening now. I’m sitting in a parking lot with Possum. She’s watching Litte Einsteins on her tablet while I wait for the Chinese place to “deliver” our order to the car window.

  231. I need to drive up to Santa Barbara and do a few hours of work, and then go to the gym. But it’s getting late. Bleh.

  232. I loved Charles Bronson. The Mechanic. He was the shit in the early 70s. I’ve seen every CB movie. I actually crushed on Coburn in Mag 7. Chato’s Land was my favorite movie as a kid. Hush your whore mouth puppy

  233. Just watched Logan Lucky. Two thumbs up. It was a little slow in parts but it was fun and the end sequence explaining things was great. I’d watch it again.

  234. We met a newfie today while out. He was a lot like Moose, possibly bigger. Utter lovebug. The owner was a nice lady, too. “He thinks I walk him so that he can meet people.”

  235. Newfies are ❤️. Co-worker just rescued a Doxie Blue Heeler cross. Pray for co-worker.

  236. Blue Weiner.

  237. I have a dinner date a week from Tuesday with the girl I’ve been babbling to youse guys about. Current mood:

  238. Congrats, Sean!!!


  240. 👋🏻👍🏻👊🏻

  241. Whoop-de-do!

    Don’t poop yourself.

    Chicks hate that.

  242. Doxie Blue Heeler cross

    Will gather a tight herd of rats together but won’t kill them. Most horrible mixed breed ever. I’m so sorry.

    Sean, that’s great news. Please don’t do anything Mare suggested last week.

  243. Sean, wait until the dessert course to pull out your penis. Any time before that is just crude.

  244. *takes notes*

    -no poop…

    -ignore Mare…

    -don’t pull out…

  245. I was walking through the living room while ago and Mrs. Pinto was watching the Oscars. I Aster what is Alice Cooper doing at the Oscars? Turns out that was Sandra Bullock. Damn she look bad

  246. I’m waiting for the rescue response. So far, Jackie likes the Doxie blue heeler rescue. Her ex shot her in the head and left her for dead. Dan makes me feel guilty about getting angry at Jackie. She is a horrible MSS. Before her head shot, she was an ER RN.

  247. You’ll do fine Sean, just be yourself.

    If that doesn’t work be somebody else, just not Alex.

  248. MSS?

  249. I really want a Dorgie. I’ll settle for a Doxie Heeler cross.

  250. Meat Sweat Smell

  251. Anything crossed with a heeler is going to require you to get outdoors a lot.

  252. Did you do your corned beef, laura? Imma doin pastrami.

  253. Heh. Sean right now:

    Congrats, man.

  254. Sean, I’m so happy for you!!

  255. Ha! Life is coming at Sean in the best way possible!

  256. Sean, my last advice, that you mentioned it’s best to ignore and I agree.

    1) act like the man you want to be

    B) don’t let the lack of emotional development control the date

    3) let the man you want to be listen to this woman who is not entirely sure who she wants to be

    G) my dear brother stopped developing emotionally at age 16 when he became an alcoholic and he let the immature self pick his partners instead of the man he could have been. You stopped the cycle. Please, please, enjoy this good point in your life.

  257. *listens to mare*

    *hearts mare*

  258. Whoa, that’s pretty deep mare. Better post a tutorial for us paste eaters

  259. Jay, the beef is curing in the corning brine (started yesterday). It’s an equilibrium brine, so the meat can stay in there for weeks without over-salting. But it should be done curing in 7-10 days. Part of it will be smoked and made into pastrami, the rest will remain as it is, to be cooked as corned beef for St. Patty’s Day dinner.

    I’m pretty stoked

  260. “Life is coming at Sean in the best way possible!”
    With cookies and a big trust fund?

  261. 4% NaCl equilibrium brine, with 175 ppm of the nitrite.Or 200 ppm? I don’t remember. It’s written down on the sheet in the kitchen.

  262. Mare, you are the sweetest.

  263. So, I’m not sure if the hipster bartender at Olive Garden today was too busy or just didn’t care, or maybe did it on purpose, but I only got charged for one of my 3 glasses of wine and two of the three appetizers I ordered for lunch. I think Mike got something free too, but I’m not sure (and didn’t care after three glasses!).

    I almost felt guilty, but not enough to argue. The guy ended up with something like a 40% tip – maybe that was his plan all along?

  264. Hmm, haven’t heard of an equilibrium brine method. Interesting. Are you sous viding it?

  265. BTW, mare, I had no idea your brother was an alcoholic. It’s not easy living with us. I hope he got some help for his problems and that he didn’t drag too much of his wreckage into your life.

  266. I have a half-brother who is an alcoholic and a drug-user. He’s served time in jail, and he is currently without a driver’s license due to DUIs. He will tell you that I got all the breaks in life.

  267. I would have said the same thing a few years back, roamy. When you’re in the thick of it, you have trouble seeing past your resentments and self-pity.

  268. Brother’s old enough now that he wants to retire, but he can’t afford to. He’s never saved anything, and he’s never worked at one place long enough to have any pension.

    I’m glad you got your act together, Sean, and I’m tickled pink that you have a date.

    Now to find a lady friend for Alex…

  269. I’m glad you think I have my act together.

  270. Sometimes I wonder if our vows
    Are all that’s keepin you here now.
    Am I your anchor
    Or just a rock you drag around?

  271. Tell me now, is it so?
    Don’t let me be the last to know
    My hands are shaking
    Don’t let my derp keep breaking

  272. OY!!

  273. MMM alternate requested. Headed out to buy OJ for a sick toddler.

  274. I’ll do one.

  275. Wishing Sean the best of luck.

    Her name isn’t by chance Chelsea or Caitlyn?

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.

Comments RSS