Something is Fishy

So

I was surfing teh webs and came across an interesting little factoid about the Angler Fish

There’s an obvious mom joke lurking in there…

It seems that the wimmins have enslaved the menz of this particular osteichthyes

That takes some ballz – the bitches!!

Mitchell seems to have been busy with this one –

What kind of fish might you be?

Whorefish

Seahores   (click with care if at work)

Dogfish

sail fish

srewfish

?????

 

 

 

218 Comments

  1. wakey wakey

    I’ve got to get moving on this christmas stuff. ugh.

  2. Me too, but I’ve got until Thursday to do something I told them I needed three weeks for.

  3. i was biginning to wonder whether or not i even knew u vile b-stages any more….

    then Sean swooped in for the save:

    “Comment by Sean M. on December 11, 2017 11:14 pm

    Chunk size isn’t nearly as important as having a good sense of humor.

    Yeah.”

  4. what are you getting us carin?

  5. if you’re worried about our identity, check out the h2 Christmas display

  6. Everyone is getting Motor City Battery T-shirts.

  7. “Motor City Battery” –

    are they gonna open for QOTSA?

    do you get a kick in the face as a parting gift if you go to the concert?

  8. If mean, your camera gets kicked and then you lie about it, and get all your connections on social media to hype the story … then yes.

  9. *wonders if jimes is fish intolerant*

  10. *note to self:
    on’tday alktay aboutyay ethay ameracay incidentyay otay arincay . . . she’s ensitivesay . . . . *

  11. https://lingojam.com/PigLatinTranslator

  12. I should be out shoveling, but Thursday. Plus the bacterial colony in my throat is growing again. I just can’t get any rest to fight it off.

  13. It’s been all over the homme pages. He’s issued apologies both written and video. he’s told her he will make it right, and that it was unintentional (basically admitted he’d had too much to drink – and that the stage lights affected what he saw, but that it was a dick move and he was going to make some changes to his life to not embarrass his friends, family and bandmates).

    Meanwhile, people have taken to his wife’s insta and attacked her viciously, and the photographer continues to exaggerate the whole thing and has claimed at one point it was “sexual assault”. She posted a picture that showed zero injury (despite the fact that she’s a photographer and you’d think she’d be able to capture whatever it was that supposedly happened), and now has admitted that the only reason she went to the ER was because she developed a headache.

  14. He shouldn’t apologize, sounds like she deserved kicking.

  15. i assume there is some back-story for this:
    http://tinyurl.com/y87hdwpy

  16. Manuel needs a few years in Leavenworth.

  17. “claimed at one point it was “sexual assault””

    some chicks dig a boot to the puss…
    or so i’ve heard

  18. ahhrite – i got get to work

  19. everyone be quiet, jimbro just figured out there’s a new poat.

  20. Soooo .. I pulled a Mare and spent my early morning on the other poat.

    *kicks blog in the camera face*

  21. *blames early morning drinking*

  22. I read yesterday that this homey guy is also in The Eagles or Death Metal. So he should probably claim PTSD from the Bataclan incident and then him and the camera chick should team up and sue CAIR. $50 mill ought to solve every bodies hurt feelings.

  23. Imma gonna need $51 million. Better start using that amazon shopping link, people.

  24. My truck tail light was fixed in about 10 minutes.

    (See other post for details)

  25. The Eagles OF Death Metal.

  26. I fixed your mom’s taillight in under 10 minutes.

  27. These guys charge a labor rate of $55/hour.

  28. Racism flow chart

    https://is.gd/4CFr0u

  29. Take It Easy, PG, I’ve Got a Peaceful, Easy Feeling.

  30. That’s Life in the Fast Lane.

  31. Heh, wish I could give that gif to about 1000 people, jimbro.

  32. Labor rate around here is often over $100 per hour.

  33. I don’t see color, I do see culture.

    Mine is better, but you can sell me your spice mix.

  34. Wrong Eagles.

  35. Putting a man on the Moon is not equivalent to putting a stick through your nose.

    Is that rayciss?

  36. Yes, that’s racist. Objective facts often are, according to many.

  37. The only reason I knew the rate was the big sign posted over the desk. A kid in his early 20’s did the work. It’s a good shop close by and he does cars and commercial trucks.

    http://forrestautobodyinc.com/

    If you need any work done I’m sure he’ll squeeze you in the schedule

  38. I squeezed your mom in the schedule.

  39. Apparently the lip-plate thing started as a way of keeping the neighboring tribes from stealing/raping their women.

    Americans decided to invent feminism instead.

  40. It’s cold AF out today. Going down to 8º tonight.

  41. 12 when I woke up. Refreshing dog walk!

  42. I had to shovel about three inches of snow. It was fluff, so pretty easy.

    No heart attack for me!

  43. LOL America First Project sent a 12 yo girl to interview Roy Moore.

    3d chess.

  44. 12 yo girl

    Too old.

  45. Eff Christmas.

  46. Crashed the f out of my shin on a box jump.

    owie.

    I mean, Josh Homme kicked me in the shin.

  47. I jumped on your mom’s box.

  48. I mean, Josh Homme did.

  49. why is he green? Is he the Hulk?

  50. Worst fishsticks thread ever.

  51. Comparisons have been made. That’s the old drummer, Joey.

  52. On all the news yesterday, and Inside Edition, but I repeat myself….they had on the three women accusing Trump of harassment/assault.

    The one said, while participating in one of Trump’s beauty pageants, he lined them up and stared at them. That was her complaint.

    Mmkay. Isn’t that the point of beauty pageants – to flaunt one’s beauty in order to be oogled and the best one gets the cash and prizes?

  53. But it was Trump doing it, beasn. Come on!

  54. One asked for her phone number.

    The horror!

  55. The Marshall Faulk story stinks

  56. She complains that he would greet her by grabbing her boobs and butt.

    He then invites her up to his room and she goes.

    What?

    And the same time two other players are sexting her?

    She has to be doing something to attract all of this.

  57. She has to be doing something to attract all of this.

    Yeah, the rest of the team.

  58. LOL, Jay

  59. Everybody knows that football and basketball players are aggressive even when it comes to the chicks. They do gropey kinds of shit because they can. A lot of the women let it happen in their attempt to catch one.
    I can think back to highschool and college and know this to be true because I saw it in action. Even the a-holes on the track team thought they could get away with it. Though it may also be a cultural thing too.

    If you didn’t want to be harassed, you avoided those guys.

  60. Srsly, my first roommate in college got crabs from one of the dogs on the track team. And she did more than one of them dogs.

  61. Two of the gals in my sorority were getting physically abused by their football boyfriends.

  62. “got crabs from one ”

    fiddler?
    whoreshoe?
    peekytoe?

  63. Total whoreshoe

  64. Re: Marshall Faulk.

    Sometimes Starfuckers actually expect their starfucking to lead to stardom, like it did for that Kardashian whore. When their starfucking days are over and they don’t have their own show, they get all butthurt and play victim olympics. That’s what this one feels like.

  65. Two of the gals in my sorority

    Delta Delta Delta can I Help Ya Help Ya Help Ya?

  66. Is now the time that we all type in our sorority girl jokes?

  67. I don’t have any sorority girl jokes, unless your mom was a sorority girl.

    She never mentioned it.

  68. Comment by Jay in Ames on December 12, 2017 9:34 am
    Those jobs aren’t just going to come back…

    ——–

    Is there someone else in the world…

    who has hit the pinnacle of political success without doing, saying, writing, making or working at all for it and yet thinks they are smarter than everyone in the room and still yet continues to speak like a completely self-unaware jackass like Obama?

    I THINK NOT!

  69. National Kick a Photographer in the Face day:

    LOL

    While I was working out today a New Year’s Resolution crossed my mind, I think I’m going to try and not swear for a year. I’m not really much of a swearer anyway but when I’m with certain people (my sister) I seem to let it fly a bit more. I will still be able to say things like, “fudge” or “whore” or “slut” especially when I speak of your mother, but I’m going to try and keep it to zero.

    Good luck, mare, when politics is involved it’s hard not to say VERY VERY bad words.

  70. I got TiFW to drop an F bomb, I can make mare swear.

  71. I was not a good fit in the sorority. But being in one did get me scholarship money. Which was nice.

  72. What’s the first thing a sorority girl does in the morning?

    Walks home.

  73. That’s one of the cleaner ones.

    You’re welcome.

  74. I can give up swearing during Lent.

    But I also have to back off paying attention to politics also, for that to happen.

    Mr. B. gives me a pass during tax season, too.

  75. I better get all my swearing in before the New Year. Anything about Obama, Powers, Gruber, Schumer, Pelosi, Jarrett, Lynch and all the other pussies in Obama’s administration make me want to swear like that mayor in the cable show set in the west wherein he says the word c**t every other word. It was popular about 3-4 years ago. Can’t remember the name.

  76. Mr. B. gives me a pass during tax season, too.

    ——-

    HAHAAAAAH

    We are simpatico.

  77. Deadwood

    Just like Obama.

  78. The only scenario I can see where Jay would make me swear would be incessant puns.

    DAMN YOU, JAY!!!

  79. Comment by Hotspur on December 12, 2017 1:48 pm
    Deadwood
    Just like Obama.

    ——

    LOL

    You assholes are making me laugh today.

  80. Mare, do you have Netflix?

  81. Yes.

  82. Watch Godless. It’s a great series.

  83. Concur, Godless is good. Ending was meh.

  84. Okay, will try and start it tonight.

  85. relatively short, too.

  86. Agree, Jay. The ending was rushed and incomplete. It probably needed an eighth episode.

  87. Don’t let the first episode confuse you. There’s a lot of backstory to cover, and a lot of characters to introduce.

  88. Michelle Dockery is gorgeous.

  89. Putting a man on the Moon is not equivalent to putting a stick through your nose.

  90. Welcome to 9:20AM.

  91. Well, that didn’t work out like I had hoped.

    Putting a man on the Moon is not equivalent to putting a stick through your nose.
    ——————————
    I think its sort of hilarious that the only thing African culture claims is that everyone hated it so much they walked across the world to get away from it.

    LOL

  92. Hey, they invented zero!

  93. The coach who was labeled as my 8th grade US History teacher but actually was just reading the newspaper every day while we stayed quiet had a shitload of old National Geographic magazines in the bookshelves in his classroom. Most of us read through them on a regular basis as there was nothing else to do except stare at each other. He called them “African Playboys” which I thought was pretty funny at the time, and still do. I can guarantee you that by the end of the first six weeks all of us boys knew which issues had the naked tribal chicks in them.

  94. What’s the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl?

    You can only fit three fingers in a bowling ball.

  95. What’s the difference between a sorority girl and a Mercedes?

    There are a lot of men who’ve never driven a Mercedes.

  96. “Putting a man on the Moon is not equivalent to putting a stick through your nose.”

    don’t underestimate the amount of effort and determination it takes to poke a stick thru your nose; just sayin’

  97. Is Dick short for Richard?

    I don’t think its terrible to ask someone named Richard if they prefer dick.

  98. rosetta used to call wiser, ‘Richard’. Long-hand for ‘dick’. Heh.

  99. Hey MJ, do you prefer dick?

  100. We bought a fiddy inch Samsung the other day and it’s going to take some getting used to feeling like I’m watching soap opera sitcoms.

  101. http://bit.ly/2nUiyXN

  102. One of husband’s old teammates sent their Christmas letter. Their daughter just had a baby girl and their son just got married in August and are due to have a honeymoon baby.

    And I sit here wondering wtf is wrong with my kids. Don’t they know their job in life is to make mine complete, with grandkids?

  103. kirstin gillibrand is a vapid piece of shit –
    & she prolly smoked davy patterson’s constrictor for the senate seat….

    https://www.dailywire.com/news/24594/no-stupid-media-trump-didnt-sexually-harass-ben-shapiro

  104. Hey MJ, do you prefer dick?
    ————————
    Prefer is a strong word.

  105. The left called us racists every time we criticized or disagreed with a black person. That didn’t work out well for them.

    Now they accuse us of sexual harassment every time we criticize, or disagree with a woman.

    The very epitome of insanity.

  106. And I sit here wondering wtf is wrong with my kids. Don’t they know their job in life is to make mine complete, with grandkids?

    ——

    We are truly simpatico.

  107. It was said yesterday but asking for a phone number is not sexual harassment. Asking someone out is not sexual harassment. I don’t know what famous wit said it but we are going to change dating, looking for a mate and the country if you can’t effing ask someone out.

  108. Arranged marriages are the wave of the future.

    Probably get grandkids sooner that way too.

  109. I believe one of the chicks on MeAgain Kelly’s show said Trump asked for her phone number and that was sexual harassment. She felt harassed, then gave him her number.

  110. Trump couldn’t do any better, either. Uh huh.

  111. Have they seen who he’s married to? That’s the level to play to. Not the receptionist.

  112. I prefer dick

  113. Now they accuse us of sexual harassment every time we criticize, or disagree with a woman.
    The very epitome of insanity.
    —————————————————–
    I listened to Scott Adams periscope the other day.

    Two things that stuck with me:

    1. There are people accusing Trump of being mentally unwell that go off on wild fantasies and wish cast removing him via the 25th Amendment because he’s a crazy Russian spy.

    2. Democrats tried to beat Trump by portraying him as a womanizing sexual monster. That didn’t work so they’re going to try it again.

  114. SAT CONG! Every.single. last. one. of. them.

  115. I’ve worked with a Urologist named Dick Long.

    Honest Injun.

  116. I’ve met him. Nice guy. His friends call him “Dick Dirt”. Soil conservation scientist.

  117. Let us never forget Rosetta’s favorite ball player, Dick Pole.

  118. and the google image search for Floyd’s balls

  119. It’s a special kind of sadism to have the last name of Dick and name your son Richard.

  120. https://is.gd/SBB9jN

  121. Don’t forget about legendary race car driver Dick Trickle.

  122. https://is.gd/dXMv7K

  123. It’s a special kind of sadism to have the last name of Dick and name your son Richard.

    https://is.gd/S3Ifv2

  124. There was very little Rosetta posted or commented on that didn’t make me laugh. He was just so very, genuinely, funny.

    He burned brightly.

  125. One of my high school classmates was named Richard Straight.

    We called him Boner.

  126. You know, I still laugh and laugh and laugh about him.

    The only time he didn’t laugh with me was in Arizona. He was carrying around an iPad and I asked him if he was just trying to make his big dumb fat ass look smaller by carrying something so big.

    I laughed. He did not. I’m pretty sure he tried to kill me in my sleep later that night.

  127. I worked with a guy whose last name was Dick. He named his son Dragan.

  128. He wasn’t anything like his normal self in Arizona. I noticed it at the time but didn’t think much of it. It just seemed peculiar.

    It was probably because he was around you, MJ.

  129. Senator Moore is going to need a twitter account.

  130. Okay, having this new smart teevee may be shortlived. Can’t figure out the line of pixels going across the middle of the screen.

    Can anyone recommend a good regular ol’ teevee?

    We bought one last year because cheap and there was no option to turn the SAP off. That is why we bought this one.

  131. We’ve decided, he should call Gillibrand a whore bag on his first tweet.

  132. I bet he wins this “too close to call” race by 10 points.

  133. Arranged marriages are the wave of the future.

    I have tentatively explored this option for beasnson. My daughter’s Indian friend isn’t interested. She wants to marry a fellow Sikh.

  134. *wonders if Moore’s opponent has a box of ballots waiting in his trunk*

    You know that is what democrats do in ‘too close to call’ races.

  135. Same thing with Trump. People knew what the pollster/reporter wanted to hear and didn’t want to appear deplorable so they waffled on their answers.

  136. It’ll be 9pts

  137. Erin needs her marriage arranged. So far (with one) she has horrible taste.

    There are some regulars of mine with a son who is in LOVE with her. He’s nice, cute, athletic, and going to play sports in college. We call this type a Winner. Probably nothing bad about him.

    I have her snapchatting him. He made his folks eat at our restaurant last night because he knew she was working.

    We’re accepting code name for him .. now … go.

  138. I’ve got nothing.

  139. Family is very nice, and great tippers.

  140. Jock Strap

  141. What sport is he going to play in college?

  142. Huh. That connotes a dick head … and if that were the case she’d be all over him.

    No, seems really nice. He told her that I was SO nice. Obviously has great judgment. Probably doesn’t smoke pot.

  143. Lacrosse.

  144. Realistically, if he’s going away to school and she’s not going there with him, he’s going to be the fish that got away.

  145. Suck Up

  146. It’s a michigan school. Not too far.

    He’s not a suck up if he’s being truth, Hotspur you fucker.

  147. TV is pissing me off. Put in a movie and the pixelly bar is still there.

  148. Panda.

  149. I just don’t think Panda is going to fit with anyone.

  150. The favourite?

  151. I just had a crazy idea……smoked butter. We googled it, it’s a thing and it’s supposed to be awesome.

    Next cold day I am smoking cheese, cream cheese, and butter.

    And ice.

  152. He may be the favorite. Good idea.

  153. or chosen.

  154. LOL. Fan favorite?

  155. I have the girls at work working on her. That she’s snapchattting him is a plus/good sign

  156. He’s got a LOT of competition, and most of them are complete dick heads.

  157. Closet.

  158. I’m not pick up what you’re laying down coalex

  159. How ’bout Otter?

  160. Daughter’s husband

  161. SIL

  162. or DH of course.

  163. Designated Hitter?

  164. Okay, Drudge is just fucking with us. He’s counting all of the urban districts first, then will trickle in the rural vote all night.

    Asshole.

  165. Donald Hump.

  166. It wouldnt be so bad if this DH stood for Doogie Howser, I guess.

  167. Until I became citizen, I scrupulously avoided any political activity/ contribution etc (besides snarking on internet). Because I don’t think furriners should meddle.

    But now I am free to do so, and I just did something.
    I contributed to https://mikeflynndefensefund.org/

    A respected warrior has been driven to bankruptcy by assholes. I want to help him defray some litigation costs.

  168. Blanket

  169. All this consumer confidence is kicking my ass. We made all of our numbers last month. Before Thanksgiving. Bustle. At 10 AM on a fucking Tuesday.

  170. Shhhhh. Your community is clearly unorganized.

  171. >>All this consumer confidence is kicking my ass. We made all of our numbers last month. Before Thanksgiving. Bustle. At 10 AM on a fucking Tuesday.

    **Confidently consumes another piece of pie.**

  172. Drudge is a dick.

  173. Drudge, like your mom, is linking the New York TImes.

  174. Mare loves Tushar.

    Deeply and sincerely.

  175. Oh, and shut all your whore mouths. You stupid whores.

  176. Tushar is a great American.

  177. I said that somberly, not Hannitly.

  178. We need a shit ton more immigrants like Tushar. A. Shit. Ton.

  179. A Mare’s love is very different from that of a square…

  180. Mare, I have a pessimistic view of immigrants. Most are leeches and mooches. Very few have enough pride and work ethic to work hard and earn an honest living.
    I am not saying you should drive me out, but stop bringing in more. Or at least vet them better.

    I think an immigrant, even after becoming citizen, should not be given all the welfare benefits given to a citizen.

  181. My Dear, Tushar, that is exactly why we need more like you.

  182. Moore is only up by 8 on Fox.

    Is the sky falling?

    Cole Soar, the Stick with a net

  183. Moron on FB recommended Train Deportation. If a family member you migrated in was a terrorist or criminal, train deportation would be the norm. Incentive for buying in to the Constitutional precepts

  184. Up 4.6 now.

  185. Our January organizational merchandise and New Year New You crap is here…already selling. Crazy retail. WalMart stock is beyond retarded right now.

  186. Major rant between us. My grandfather was a POS. For family reasons, I kept it on the DL. After seeing what happened to the family members that spoke up, I went undercover. Warned all my youngsters and absorbed the vitriol. My pride moment was kicking my grandfather’s ass in the kitchen of the Hondo House. FF. Mi familia is posting anti Moore and pro Jones shit. I want to scream. I want to call them out on their hypocrisy. Taking the high road. Unconfessed grave sin is a hell express ticket. Enjoy the ride

  187. I had not spoken out about Roy Moore so far, because I don’t want opportunistic Dems to grab that seat.

    But once Moore wins, it will be time to find if there is any substance behind those allegations. If there is, he should go, and AL Gov should appoint a replacement.

  188. Doesn’t sound good, folks.

  189. Timing is everything. Moore = Trump IMHO. Silence for 40 years and bing bang bong Bad Touch Santa.

  190. I am content with whatever the outcome. IDFC how hell recruits their denizens.

  191. Anyone else get a feeling that Gabe Malor has moved beyond being a NeverTrumper, and is an actual liberal now?

  192. has anyone sexually molested the chatroom yet today?

  193. I pray for Gabe. He still knows his legal stuff.

  194. Childhood sexual abuse can fuck a person up. I think I maintain pretty well. I stopped cutting for the most part with a few lapses. My recent BS is pulling out my eyebrows. Starting to look weird. Miracle on 34th street weird.

  195. “Richard said: ‘It ended up with about three or four of his fingers in the crack of my a**, resting in the crack of my a**’, adding it lasted for several seconds”

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5156899/Larry-King-groped-claims-Eddie-Fishers-ex-wife.html#ixzz516lRVGl2
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

  196. i still love ya like a brother oso….

    even if you look weird

  197. Watching Godless.

  198. re: the fingers in the ass-crack dealio –

    just say NO

    unless you don’t mind him looking for change

  199. i have a mild case of germophobia –
    so the likelihood of me putting my fingers in the chatroom’s ass crack is low –

    what’s wiser up to?

  200. Mare, it is awesome. I have family members rooting for and voting for a death cult Dem in AL. Eyebrow hair breaks before plucking.

  201. But of course they did…

    https://squawker.org/culture-wars/dna-testing-companies-like-23andme-admit-adding-fake-african-ancestry-to-white-profiles-in-order-to-screw-with-racists/

    Assholes shoot themselves in the foot and destroy their own business…

  202. Decision Desk HQ calling Dug Jones winner

  203. I guess Alabamans let the goddamn northeast media tell them how to think. Shame on them.

  204. At least Gropy Frankenstein has to go

  205. Like almost everywhere else, a couple of majoelr population centers decided the race. Guess the demographics of Birmingham, Montgomery, Mobile…

  206. Moore was about the shittiest candidate that could have been put forward, even before the Allred hit job.

  207. He won 2 GOP primaries before today’s vote. I was a MoBrooks voter, but Turtle and Trump were all about the Strange.

  208. Long story short, fuck AL.

  209. Dan thinks I should ignore and pray for my abusers and their enablers. I eat my anger and I agree. My right eyebrow is scarred. I may have to invest in the Chimayo chola

  210. Xbrad – I can’t believe he got as close as he did. What was it? Less than a point?!?
    The only thing I cared about in that race was saving the seat. Well, AND sticking it to the left.

  211. Chi, I survived Thanks Nancy and 8 years of TFG. I DON’T Fucking care anymore. No kids. FU

  212. Make up your mind
    Decide to derp with me
    Around the lake tonight
    Around the lake tonight
    By my side

  213. HHD in a bit.

  214. https://thehostages.wordpress.com/2017/12/13/hhd-258/


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