MMM 294: Rainy October Monday

Long day yesterday.  Wife took horse for trail ride in newly-repaired trailer, Possum was inconsolable, had to take her to church by my lonesome, then my parents came for visit in the afternoon through dinner time.  Had to do some dishes this morning and jar up some beef broth.   Pics now.

Pretty smile.

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Belly button rings are so 2003.

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She looks cranky.

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Looks like an outtake from a photo shoot based.

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I can’t do this and that’s okay.

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The gym dom look.

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Tasteful monochrome.

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Are those phragmites!?  Get out of there miss, I’ve got some extreme weeding to do.

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Belly tattoos are so 2006.

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And the week begins.

 

176 Comments

  1. Coffee’s done. Half-decaf.

  2. Chris: Answer to your hip question is at the bottom of the comment list.

  3. Belly tattoo looks like she has a mustache.

    Ugh, no sleep last night. I’m debating whether to go in early and leave by 2pm or try and get a few hours of sleep before going into the office around 11am and staying until 4pm.

  4. Well this is embarrassing.

  5. Left home without your pants again?

  6. Hotspur wears pants?

  7. Cargo pants.

  8. Well, it’s Columbus Day. But it’s not. Columbus Day is October 12, but the snake juice guzzlers in government changed it to the second Monday in October so that they could have a three day weekend allowing them to do even less work than normal.

    Other people changed it to Indigenous Peoples Day, so that they could celebrate all of the raping, murder, enslavement, and wholesale butchering the injuns did before the white man arrived to give them smallpox.

    Have a nice day.

  9. Happy Expansion of Civilization Day, where we celebrate bringing Civilization to the savages!

  10. The scratchy throat I had all last week finally decided to declare its true flu nature yesterday. Fuck viruses. FUCK THEM ALL TO HELL.

    Girl one is certainly not a classic beauty, but she sure does have a pretty smile, leon. I wonder if girls today realize how far a pretty, honest smile goes with men. I know it’s my favorite physical trait of my wife, and she flashed it at me pretty quick.

  11. If girl 1 added a bit of fat back on she’d be a lot more attractive. You’re correct that she does have a lovely smile.

  12. Oh, and as an honest-to-god one-half Italian, Happy Columbus Day.
    If you don’t thank god for western civilization, try living without it for a few centuries.

  13. Look, Indians, we won, you lost and it was a long fight what, about 400 years? So we get to do what we want. Congrats and thank you, Columbus, finding the land for Western civilization to have the greatest country in the world. Ever.

  14. There’s some archeological evidence suggesting that the “indigenous peoples” came across the Bering Strait 12kya or so, displacing a small population of caucasoids dating back to 20kya coming from northern Europe.

    They invaded and genocided, we just came later and
    Took
    It
    Back.

  15. Look, Indians, we won, you lost and it was a long fight what, about 400 years? So we get to do what we want. Congrats and thank you, Columbus, finding the land for Western civilization to have the greatest country in the world. Ever.

    Remember those bumper stickers with a Confederate flag crossed out and the phrase, “You lost. Get over it”? I’ve always wanted to get one with a picture of American Indians and the same phrase.

  16. 10000 years in North America and they hadn’t invented a wheel. If it wasn’t Europe invading, someone else would’ve.

  17. I think it was Neil Gaiman who wrote in one of his books that Prehistoric America was basically the 7-11 at 3am: everyone wandered in at some point.

  18. hahahaha, Stupid football players are clueless about what real “systematic oppression” looks like. Effing morons. They need more fathers kicking their asses when they were young. They have an undeserved high opinion about the thoughts swirling around in their lackluster brains.

  19. All of human history is the story of (most usually) superior culture conquest. Mistakes are made when we don’t force assimilation.

  20. SOrry american indians that you were still content with tribalism, living in tents, and the like.

    I’m sure parts of it were awesome, but overall it probably sucked.

  21. Mozart was writing symphonies, and the AI were dancing to drums around fires.

    /just saying.

  22. /waits for someone to denounce me.

    /takes a knee

  23. A buddy just called to ask me to go walk through a house with him. Not a complete home inspection, but just to catch anything glaring. He is contemplating moving around the corner from his current nice house since he lives on a very busy thoroughfare.
    I should re-consider getting that license to be a home inspector…
    At the very least, I’ll get a nice lunch & a beer out of it.

    Soccer Mom up there looks almost soft enough to be out of place here. Nice butt.

  24. Indians lived in perfect harmony as one with nature, while Whites subjugated and exploited it.

    *deep draw from bong*

  25. “They invaded and genocided,”

    the injun proggies shut that thought down quick fast and in a hurry –

    if memory serves they’ve confiscated the archaeologic evidence under some injun antiquities / burial site bullshit thing.

    i remember reading about a Caucasoid skeleton being found with a stone spear point in it dating back WAY before Columbus gave the “natives” the dirty sanchez

  26. They were aided and abetted by the fedgov, Jam. They got a law passed a long time back. Anything archeological is always theirs, even if it isn’t.

  27. Kennewick Man wasn’t a fucking Ojibwa.

  28. The other day my sister was telling me about another person we both knew. She told me that even though this woman only worked a part time job for years, her kids always looked uncared for, with dirty shoes and coats and kind of unkempt. I thought to myself “That’s ’cause she’s a pothead.”

    My sister couldn’t make heads or tails of it. Then she said, “I don’t get it, but anyway, she sure seems to love her pot.”

    I said ‘bingo!’ and sis at that moment made the connection.

    How do we walk around with several pieces of related knowledge like that and not take them out of their compartments and put them together? It happens all the time.

  29. I have a book in the back study (somewhere) that, if memory serves, claims that Vikings or their ancestors came to America via Nova Scotia centuries before Columbus got lost & bumped into it.

  30. I’ve got to clean the house, and do laundry.

    I’ll just get stoned first.

    I’m sure that works great.

  31. Columbus wasn’t the first asshole to find the place, but he was the first to bring back the information and expose it to the wider world. The explorers before him failed to do so. The vikings didn’t stay, the rumored Chinese didn’t stay… Columbus returned, and he wrote books about his journeys, and spread the knowledge.

  32. The Chinese stayed, and they opened dirty restaurants on every other street corner.

  33. Interesting.

    So, let me get this: you’re saying that if I have this list of things to do, but a non-list item that derails my energy and thought processes happens first, the list shit isn’t getting done today?

    The deuce you say!

  34. We should probably research it, Lauraw.

  35. I’m going to write up a grant proposal. right after …

    /gets stoned
    /takes nap

  36. The Chinese stayed, and they opened dirty restaurants on every other street corner.

    And laundries.

    No tiki, no washee.

  37. Wait… Where’s Oso?

  38. In Fourteen Hundred and Ninety Two,
    Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
    He hit a rock,
    And split his cock,
    And pissed all over the crew.

  39. I don’t think that could happen.

  40. Read your history books.

  41. Relevant:

  42. My minpin eats firecrackers and shits cannonballs.

  43. Seems the Chinese dug up Caucasoid settlements that pre-dated them. I saved a picture of one of the mummies they allowed to be shown at museums around the world. Well-preserved. Celtic/Viking looking dude. Long reddish hair in braids.

  44. “My over protective mother made me buy condoms because I’m staying at a house where there’s gonna be girls”.

    Co-ed sleepovers are a thing? With kids armed with condoms?
    Glad my kids are out of high school. I’d never let them go.

  45. http://enigmose.com/tarim_basin_mummies.html

  46. Seems wordpress ate my link on Tarim Basin mummies.

  47. Co-ed sleepovers are a thing? With kids armed with condoms?
    Glad my kids are out of high school. I’d never let them go.

    Yea, well I think of the things I did when I was a teenger and co-ed sleepovers weren’t a thing … it kind of invalidates the argument.

    They’re not out drinking, driving in a car, having sex in the backseat of a car. Usually, they’re just up late watching movies and crash on the couch/floor.

    It’s not a boyfriend/girlfriend thing/couples. There are usually zero couples or maybe one. At least not here.

    Brian spends the night here almost every weekend. On the couch in the living room.

  48. Brian spends the night here almost every weekend. On the couch in the living room.

    Moose hardest hit.
    (Pun definitely intended)

  49. Paula apparently knows the girl who hosted. She works at the same McDonald’s as the boy and goes to the same school. It’s a balance between giving him some freedom and reining things in. No one knows that more than Paula who got knocked up at 18 just weeks after graduation and is giving advice to the human being that her lapse in judgment produced. The whole condom thing was a “just in case” even though he claimed he wasn’t interested in these girls. We’re not that dumb.

  50. What Carin said too. When I think of the shit we did while driving around and parked with friends and girls it’s a wonder most of us made it through unscathed. I can recall a few who died along the way via motorcycle or car crashes, suicides and OD’s but they were thankfully rare.

  51. El escandalo.

  52. Let’s also not forget that Columbus never landed on the North American mainland. Just the outer islands.

  53. The indians were a mostly peaceful lot who couldn’t hold their liquor.

  54. Never invented list: wheel, booze

    Yep, they stood a chance.

  55. The indians tried that whole “Open Borders” thing.
    How’d that work out for them?

  56. Jimbro,
    Thank you! Anita said; “Jimbro gets it!”
    I could tell that her last dislocation (other hip) was not ‘benign’ by the screaming that went along with it, and the speed of the nurse running to get a muscle-relaxant into the IV…

  57. I advocate the “one strike and you’re out” program. Send me the babies.

    http://www.breitbart.com/big-government/2017/10/08/police-florida-moms-overdosed-heroin-infants-back-seat/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social

  58. The indians made the playoffs, so they have that going for them.

  59. My indian name is Fucks With Wolverines.

  60. My indian name is “snoops in room while you are at school”

  61. Never invented list: wheel, booze
    Yep, they stood a chance.

    It’s my understanding that their metallurgy was shit as well.

  62. My Indian name is “Bangs Your Mom”.

  63. Besides the wheel, sanitation, and end to human sacrifice, alcohol, AND modern medicine… what have Europeans done for the poor, sainted Native Americans?

  64. Let them invent casinos.

  65. It’s my understanding that their metallurgy was shit as well.

    I almost added “metal”, but it just felt like piling on at that point.

    Writing. Philosophy. Geometry…

  66. Until we arrived, they were fierce proponents of gun control.

  67. I don’t see what the big deal is about Weinstein. It’s not like he claimed he could grab pussy or something.

  68. the number zero

  69. I was viewing the sleep-over thing through the lens of what went on when I was in high school. If you slept over somewhere where the opposite sex was present, someone was getting nekkid. Plenty of girls got pregnant by freshman year. My sister did when she was 18 (which didn’t end well). Made me slightly paranoid when my kids got that age though I always told them since they were old enough to understand that babies are gifts, will always be welcome in my house, and they deserve to have a father (said after watching some stupid Jerry Springer-like sh*t).

    Now if it’s a group* thing with adults* in the vicinity….okay.

    *our kids’ high school has senior overnighters to keep the kids off the booze and the roads, and their track/cross country team did have some overnight stuff but a parent and/or coach was present. At prom, the kids usually did things as a group afterwards.

    *depends on who the adult is.

    While a few girls still got pregnant and drinking happened, it was nothing compared to my high school….or grade school (LSD, crack, etc)

  70. Group “sleepovers” better be in separate cabins watched over by insomniac prudish types.

  71. Scott and I were watching a show about Lewis and Clark and the Corps of Discovery a little while back. One of the parts that stuck out for me was how on the return trip, the members of the Corps were talking about how thoroughly sick of Indians’ constant bullshit they were, lol.

  72. the members of the Corps were talking about how thoroughly sick of Indians’ constant bullshit they were, lol.

    ——

    HAHAHAHAAA

  73. The indians invented group sleepovers.

  74. No one knows that more than Paula who got knocked up at 18 just weeks after graduation and is giving advice to the human being that her lapse in judgment produced.

    I totally get that.

  75. I just requested my health records from when I was in the Navy. How old do you think I’ll be when I get them? I’m 68 now.

  76. One of my partners came down with the measles last week. The CDC called me today to ask if I knew I had possibly been exposed, and if I’d ever had the measles.

    Fuck, how would I know. I’m 68.

    Then she asked if I’d been vaccinated. I said I probably was as a child, but also probably when I was in the Navy.

  77. I requested records for my DD214 or whatever the discharge paperwork form number is for my CHL in Maine prior to the constitutional carry law was enacted. Every record they had on me arrived in my PO box within a couple of months.

  78. I still have my DD214. Somewhere.

  79. Glad you mentioned measles. I was concerned you were checking for treatment of that gonorrhea from that weekend liberty pass

  80. I have my Honorable Discharge in a frame in my War Room. I bet it’s behind that.

  81. That wasn’t gonorrhea. It was a friction burn.

  82. Hotspur’s mom use to give xbradtc Indian friction burns.

  83. Just got back from a ginormous thrift store nearby. Scored a new Tommy Bahama shirt for 99 cents. These things sell for over $100 to idiots that will pay that at retail!
    I love me an ugly shirt…

  84. Nicely done, Chi.

  85. I have my Honorable Discharge in a frame in my War Room. I bet it’s behind that.

    I keep my honorable discharge in a sock under the bed.

  86. Your mom had a discharge after Fleet Week. I doubt it was honorable.

  87. LOL

  88. Down the street, several times this summer, I saw an older black guy sitting on the edge of his truck tailgate selling watermelons. Thought he was a guy just trying to make a few bucks with his crop.

  89. Obviously you are a racist.

  90. I wish I was as righteous as Jimmy Kimmel and Meryl Streep. I should let them tell me how to think and act.

  91. Meryl Streep can shove a watermelon up her ass.

  92. I’ve never watched Kimmel so I have no opinion of him.

  93. I’ve never seen Kimmel neither. Do people really watch late night TV for political opinions? Ufffffffff. Weird.

  94. I used to occasionally watch The Man Show.

  95. Kimmel was the worst part of The Man Show.

  96. Where the eff is MJ?

  97. MJ is off no longer having sex or getting to touch boobies.

  98. Nappy duty

  99. So, pretty much dead then?

  100. Again, small price to pay for a child.

  101. Tell me about the man show. When was it on?

  102. 20 years ago, Mare. When Kimmel was still fat.

  103. Speaking of assholes, what ever happened to that John Stewart shitstain?

  104. And again, speaking of assholes, this homegrown snake juice guzzler is writing a play about Flint.

  105. The show ended with a video of girls bouncing on trampolines.

  106. Hahahaha – I’m here. Watch mare never come back. I’m like mare’s kryptonite.

  107. The man show was a funny show starring Adam Corrolla w/ a little fat fuck riding his coattails who now has a nighttime show of his own.

  108. mare on October 9, 2017 at 3:40 pm
    I’ve never seen Kimmel neither. Do people really watch late night TV for political opinions? Ufffffffff. Weird
    ******

    No, they watch to have their belief system validated

  109. Stuff like this is why Rosetta picked Dean Martin for his avatard. The guy was a genius.

  110. No, they watch to have their belief system validated

    Truth. That deserved a mic drop.

  111. Jimmy Kimmel sounds like
    Jimmy Himmel sounds like
    Jimmy Himmler sounds like
    Heinrich Himmler sounds like
    JIMMY KIMMEL IS A NAZI!!!!!!!

  112. Never saw that before, ‘spur. Funny sh!t! Deano’s my fave, even more than Frank, I think.

  113. Jimmy Kimmel left his wife and kids to shtup Sarah Silverman for a few months. That tells you all you need to know about his “intelligence.”

  114. And this is the funniest thing to ever appear on TV.

  115. Oops, I fucked up that first Deano link. Here.

  116. MJr.?

  117. HAHAHA…..MJ?

  118. “Comment by Hotspur on October 9, 2017 3:20 pm

    LOL”

    ppl can’t seem to take a joke anymore

  119. i like watermelon, fried chicken, greens, playing basketball, etc…

    i’m prolly a racist or something

  120. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watermelon

    we enslaved watermelons too i see

  121. Again, small price to pay for a child.

    I thought we established with Car in that the price of a child was a goat and two chickens?

  122. That was the price of a somewhat dramatic teenaged girl.

  123. Watermelons aren’t just slaves, they’ve been bred for centuries to be pleasing to the slaveowners.

  124. This puts modern shows to shame. Funny funny people, no foul language, no political douchbaggery. Just good entertainment.

  125. *swaddles blog in smallpox-infested blanket*

  126. Howdy, foax. Anybody have any recommendations for a pellet gun that’s good for dispatching small critters? I know there are at least a couple of people here who have experience with this stuff.

    (And, no, before anyone asks, I’m not talking about offing Riley.)

  127. http://www.crosman.com/airguns/air-pistols

    Sean, I have the second one on that page within reach of me now. Given a do-over, I would go with the .22 version, but I can’t complain. I can peg a squirrel in the head at over 100ft with it no problem.

  128. Saw that one on Amazon, Chi. It seemed to be pretty well-regarded.

  129. If it can fire shorts, I would definitely go with the .22 version. (Assuming you can pass the background check.) :)

  130. I think he’s looking for a pellet gun, not a real one.

  131. you should go with the pink one.

  132. Perhaps I shall, J’Ames. It would be a nice little IDGAF touch to shoot vermin with a pink gun.

  133. I love my Gamo Whisper. 1200 fps and really quiet.

    New gas version looks even better than mine, 1300 fps.

    That or subsonic 22.

  134. College visit with Mini-me today. Laughed our asses off at a snowflake going to class in fuzzy pink footie pajamas. We joked about getting triggered by Care Bears for the remainder of the day.

    Hoping to meatup with Jay on Wednesday.

  135. https://imgur.com/gallery/W0sAm

  136. Hello weirdos.

  137. Is he crawling yet or are you a horrible father?

  138. you really shouldn’t drag him around on a leash, either.

  139. And don’t get jealous of his time with your wife’s tits.

  140. If stealth is important, you will need suppression for powerful pellet guns.

  141. Hey, you don’t know, Hospurt, the kid might be an assman.

  142. Don’t forget the bump stock!

  143. Why are you bringing your mom into this?

  144. sean, scott is right – the Gamo Whisper is a great bang for the buck pellet gun.
    i’ve enjoyed shooting mine – not as accurate as the german rifles i have – but it’s a fraction of the cost & at 30ish or under yards it’s highly effective.
    i’d definitely recommend it.

    if you have a lot of cash to burn, then a PCP Air Rifle is an option

  145. I don’t think my sponsor would want me buying PCP.

  146. If you’re looking for a simple, cheap rat gun, $59 is hard to beat for that thing. Accurate as all getout straight outta the box.
    Also, it’s fun to plink cans with the neighbor kids too.

  147. the sherm of air guns

  148. Also, it’s fun to plink cans with the neighbor kids too.

  149. *sniff sniff*

    Is MJ here? Dude, wash your hands again! I can smell diaper fingertipss from the East Coast.

  150. sean – if it’s legal (californicator law wise)
    i’ll give you the crosman pisstool i have – not a fan – but it’s ok for snakes at close range

    you have to promise you won’t put a cap in xnad’s nad tho

  151. It’s tiny Asian coed night in the weight room. I love tiny Asian coed night in the weight room.

  152. Who doesn’t?

  153. He’s already walking and hates Obama.

    Good kid.

  154. “I love tiny Asian coed”

    Thai?
    trannies?

    wiser’s demographic

  155. mj – the conversations with his dope smoking granddad are gonna be hilarious

  156. Thanks, jamjam, but I’d rather not handle your pisstool.

  157. He’s not walking fast enough.

  158. It’s tiny Asian coed night in the weight room. I love tiny Asian coed night in the weight room

    Another group of dudes disappointed that that can’t call you OrAlex…

  159. Get him started on hating Kamala Harris.

  160. Too easy.

  161. Blerg. Kick ass tips, but I couldn’t talk about it because my buddy at work didn’t make shit.

    $25 on $90, and $15 on $50 all night long. She sold two hundred dollars more than me, but I walked with more $$.

    that’s when I just need to keep it to myself.

  162. Workers of the World Unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains and C arin’s tips to gain!!!

  163. What do we want?!

    CAR IN’S TIPS!

    When do we want them?

    WHEN SHE BRINGS OUT OUR GLASS OF WATER!

  164. What’s the soup of the day?

    CAR IN’S TIPS.

  165. Just Ca rin’s tips, baby.

  166. I’d like the chef’s salad with blue cheese on the side and a cut of Car in’s tips.

  167. What will you have for an appetizer?

    I’d like to try Car in’s tips.

  168. Ugh. Take these Cari n’s tips back to the kitchen. I asked for an extra large slice.

  169. Are these Car in’s tips free range? Organic? Fair-trade?

  170. Car in promises to only stick the tip in.

  171. Indigenous peeps managed to domesticate a turkey before European incursion. Wow. Great work. IMHO Indians that were subjugated before Buffalo Soldiers were a bunch of pussies. Oooh…Pope and the Pueblos kicked Spanish ass back to El Paso. Reconquista bitches!!!!

  172. Dodgers easily routed Phoenicians.


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