Weekend Name That

Name that Hostage





  1. https://is.gd/zWLFOA

  2. wakey wakey


  4. L2:TOWMJGM.

    When is it again?

  5. later todAY

  6. MJ, criminey. End of the month.

  7. Wife wants to get a rooster. I will have to ask again about why.

  8. I hate roosters.

  9. Am I the petting zoo one? Because that made me lol.

  10. I thought all of them were mare – except the lady with the chickens , that’s Leon.

  11. I’m the day off one. Or chuby.

  12. You talk to chickens because it calms them. Predators approach in silence and it spooks them.

  13. I may be the chuby.

  14. I’m not really chubby anymore.

  15. Relatively speaking.

  16. Ever time I look at the header pic I think of Rosetta saying, “If mare was Asian.”

  17. I still feel chubby, but it’s mostly loose skin.

  18. If not for that, I’d have a 4-pack I think. Maybe 10 more # would do it, hard to know without some serious effort.

  19. Wow, notaboyfriend is on a tight leash…

  20. End of Sept is bad for me. Can we move it to end of Aug?

  21. Done, MJ. End of aug it is.

  22. My daughter is just about the opposite with notaboyfriend than that list.

    He’s still not a boyfriend, despite that when he comes over here I catch him gropping her and kissing her hand. uh huh. Not a boyfriend. THAN WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

    I need to have a talk with that girl

  23. She did go ballistic when he ignored her texts for 7 hours. You know, because friends.

  24. He’s still not a boyfriend, despite that when he comes over here I catch him gropping her and kissing her hand. uh huh. Not a boyfriend. THAN WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

    Fuck buddies?

  25. Kissing her hand? Neat, it’s like the Knights of the Round Table…pizza.

  26. Hoo boy, that last one was bad. My apologies to everyone reading this POS blog.

  27. Comment by leoncaruthers on August 12, 2017 10:35 am
    I still feel chubby, but it’s mostly loose skin.

    I still feel chubby, but it’s mostly fat.

  28. I’m so out of touch with today’s youth. WTF is “gropping”? Is it like frelling or snarbling?

  29. It’s been a week and I still need my last two grades. I’m sure that I passed everything, but I hate waiting for this crap. Just want the sheepskin and to move on.

  30. Do you want a real sheepskin? I know a guy.

  31. I prefer the finest hoboskin for my diplomas.

  32. Alex, what is the post grad degree you earned? And what was your undergraduate degree. Just curious.

  33. /kills CoAl

    Groping … just basically touching her. Hugging. That kind of stuff. He’s not grabbing her boobs or anything.

    At least not in front of me.

  34. Mare him grabbing her hands and kissing them was sweet.

    But who knows.

  35. I was kidding, I just think of like, 2nd base when I think of groping, and figured he’s already be maimed if that’s what you meant.

  36. Mare,

    BA in Economics, MS in Quantitative Economics.

  37. He’d. On phone for the foreseeable future until wife gets back from her make-up real estate class. Me and Possum might go shop for a new furnace filter soon.

  38. mostly loose skin

    They call themselves The Dixie Chicks now.

  39. Comment by leoncaruthers on August 12, 2017 9:26 am
    Wife wants to get a rooster. I will have to ask again about why.

    For the Friday Night Cock Fights down in the barrio, Leon.


  40. For the Friday Night Cock Fights down in the barrio, Leon.


    HA! good one

  41. Alex, is that mostly government work? Financial houses? Think tanks?

  42. I don’t know who to root for in Charlottesville. They can both beat the shit out of each other.

  43. Mare,

    Pretty much. The course is heavy on econometrics (statistics), as well as finance. On the West Coast it’s mostly finance jobs, while on the East Coast you have finance as well as think tanks and gov’t stuff.

    The Santa Barbara job would be economic analysis. The company does housing market analysis for the DoD, water market analysis for the state of California, and the owner wants to try and restart their old line of business building regional economic models.

    Even though it’s not ideal in terms of pay and living situation, the experience there would be very good, and probably set me up to do well wherever I go afterwards.

  44. I’d love working for a think tank, if for no other reason, than the cool sounding name.

  45. Jimbro…hahahaha Yeah, being a surgeon isn’t cool enough.

  46. My cousin used to work for the Goldwater Institute if you’re interested in Arizona.

  47. There’s a lot of ways to earn a living and economics doesn’t sound like one I’d enjoy. Different strokes for different folks I guess. My job is not all wine and roses but I look forward to going in most of the time. Examining the feet of a teenager who has worn Crocs without socks most of the summer or a baby’s hips who just crapped its diaper makes me question the wisdom of my decision every single time.

  48. its should be his or her … just got lazy

  49. Sex Doll Repair Technician is another one I’d avoid.

  50. We have a little ladder on our dock and every so often there’s crap on one of the stairs. One of the boys is tasked with cleaning it, and before too long, more dried dung appears on the step. No one saw anything as far as who the culprit was until two nights ago. We were in the living room looking out and the motherfcuking beaver was sitting on the step! He took his sweet ass time eating whatever the hell he was eating and then swam down to the neighbor’s dock.i just heard a splash and saw him swimming away. Sure enough, dock stairs are covered with beaver shit.

  51. Bings “Beaver repellent”

  52. *finds repellent beaver search in history*

  53. *gags at Lena Dunham*

  54. Comment by Jimbro on August 12, 2017 12:35 pm
    Bings “Beaver repellent”

    I’ve repelled many beavers over the course of my life.

  55. Jimbro’s story made me think of this immediately:

  56. Just get ready for trapping season, Jimbro.

    I’m enjoying cybersecurity now that I’m back to it, but I’ll happily retire to gardening and farming when I’ve got things arranged for it.

  57. If a beaver is pooping on your dock, it’s trapping season.

  58. I like those sandals Chi. Reminds me of the barefoot boot sole they allegedly used in Vietnam. I’ve seen pictures of them but really don’t know how widespread their use was or if it was just a concept.


  59. Last meal was steak and an omelet on Thursday night. Since then I’ve had a couple ounces of cashews and half of a cucumber. I think I can make it to this evening, but I don’t know if I want to break my fast with something healthy, or be bad.

  60. Want some beaver?

  61. Healthy but tasty is the way to go. I haven’t eaten since Thursday night either. I’m cooking down some of last year’s tomato sauce with some garlic and onion for keto pizza later.

  62. I don’t know. I’m really craving an IHOP omelet and pancakes…

  63. Skip the pancakes, have more bacon.

  64. And tell them to crack the eggs for the omelet. Sometimes they add pancake batter to them to make them fluffier.

  65. Most of the time I love my job. ISO audits and bureaucratic bullshit are my Crocs and diapers.

    My next flight experiment has been delivered, and I’m spending my Saturday taking care of all the things my family was too lazy to do over the last three weeks. Pissed off at the amount of rotten food found in the fridge because I know the kids had their heads in there every day and could have tossed the peaches from July and the sauerbraten gravy after they ate all the meat.

  66. Just made blueberry pancakes, bacon and ham for the fam. Mrs. Pupster has to work today, I’ll be cleaning house and then going to the grocery store, might stop of at the liquor store as well.

    Anybody need anything?

  67. I wonder what the purpose of those barefoot boots was?
    To make the enemy think we were without boots and therefore weakened?
    To make them think they were actually looking at VC trails?
    A search is in order…

    As to bacon – Moar, please. But, I can’t wait to get to Hell so I can meet the guy that invented turkey bacon, because I am going to kick her right in the balls.

  68. It’s a process, Roamy. I’m working on the Pupsterboys as well, last time I put a pile of rotten leftovers on the table and called them to dinner it was extremely satisfying, for me. Boy1 is the worst offender, he asks for fresh fruit and vegetables from the health food store and then promptly forgets them in the crisper drawer. Nasty.

  69. The tomato sauce absent meatballs is one of our recurring infractions. Glasses half filled with milk or juice put in the fridge to “keep cold for later” is one that drives me batshit crazy. They never drink it and they’ve been tipped over more than a few times which coats the fridge with a rancid milk smell. I don’t hesitate to dump the glasses now as soon as I discover them.

  70. Alton Brown is a moron

  71. Paula is a wicked softie for the boys and every now and then buys syrup for chocolate milk. They go through glasses and coffee mugs making chocolate milk all day long. It never occurs to them to maybe rinse one out and reuse it. I may or may not squeeze the syrup down the drain every so often to hasten its disappearance

  72. AB is the coolest nerd on TV by far.
    Roy Underhill is close behind, though.

  73. Boy1 is the worst offender, he asks for fresh fruit and vegetables from the health food store and then promptly forgets them in the crisper drawer. Nasty.

    And a waste of $$, too.

  74. Hahahaha, the good kind of moron.

  75. I did something similar to Pupster with the table, but it was the dishwasher rejects. The kids divvy up who unloads what out of the dishwasher then race to see who finishes first. I set the table for them with dishes and utensils with some of the more flagrant dried-on tomato sauce, cheese, bits of salad in the tines, etc. They load the dishwasher, too, so it’s a mistake made twice.

  76. I have found that it isn’t until they are out on their own, providing for themselves that they “see” all of the stuff that was invisible to them before.

  77. Amen Teresa. We rant and rave about this stuff but deep down I know it won’t sink in until they’re facing real consequences from their actions or inactions as the case may be. Some of it does sink in eventually.

  78. Well, that was a dumb move on my part. Someone tweeted the gif of the Blues Brothers driving at the Illinois Nazis and driving them off the bridge. Thought it was funny (hit like and retweeted) until I learned that some idiot did that in real life.

  79. Meh, dead Nazis don’t bother me. The more dead on both sides of that mess, the better.

  80. Speaking of Illinois Nazis, the soda tax revolt.


  81. Alex, I didn’t like it when the Muzzie drove into the Christmas market crowd, I don’t like this either.

    Now if you had some protestors blocking the road and ganging up on a car and the driver decided he needed to get the hell out of there before they started breaking windows, that’s another story.

  82. “Toni Preckwinkle, the president of the Cook County Board of Confiscators…”

    Good line from the beverage tax link

  83. Those people down there want to fight. Protect the businesses and let them. Neither has a cogent argument. No one THERE does.

  84. Notboyfriend just showed up.


  85. They’re just chill. You guys need to get off her back.

  86. /slams door, turns “cats fucking a closet” up to 11

  87. I’m going for a run. I have some tension to burn off.

  88. I’m pretty much living vicariously through the lovelives of Car in’s daughters and cow orkers at this point.

  89. Seller declined to counter. Going to raise the offer 5k and then let it drop if they don’t respond.

  90. Who’s up for a few weeks of talking about race and statues?

    Me either.

  91. Personally, I’m fine with abolishing whiteness… just so long as we abolish blackness, brownness, redness, and yellowness along with it.

    No? Then GFY.

  92. Notboyfriend was here – literally- for 15 min. I’m guessing that he was doing a quick drive-by before he went to work.

    He lives a half an hour away, and no – we’re not on his way to work.

  93. But they’re just chill.

  94. 13 minutes of cuddling?

  95. They’re CHILL Coalex

  96. I haven’t even filled you all in on what’s going on with my son.



  97. Is he not as chill?

  98. I can’t wait for people to meet Moose. you guys are going to love him.

    If you can overlook the smell.

    /looks away

  99. #2 met a chick and they moved in together WAAAAAY to fast. So my two boys live together with girlfriend.

    #1 HATES the girlfriend. #1 is an excellent judge of character, so since he’s spent a lot more time around her, I’m inclined to see his viewpoint.

    Apparently the other day, girlfriend pulled a major passive aggressive move – #2 just LEFT. It was over dishes, and #2 was doing what were maybe #1’s dishes and girlfriend went ballistic. Want #2 to yell at his brother.

    My two boys love each other and they simply don’t do this – they’re not going to get mad at each other over simple chores. They’re just not. They’re practically twins (13 months apart).

    So. No. not chill.

  100. If she doesn’t come back, they’ll be better off.

  101. I bet Moose isn’t even real. All Newfie stock photos.

  102. No, my son left – just left while she was having a fit. He’s not a fighter. He’s got so much going for him and deserves someone great. Then he came back. ugh.

  103. Oh, he’s real. And fabulous.

    But he does kinda smell like the lake.

  104. I really am in the midst of teenage hell. I have three freakin teenagers all testing me in different ways right now.

    i think I need to start buying box wine.

  105. Time for matching “Bros Before Ho’s” tattoos in fancy script

    (I know Ho is not possessive but hos looked weird)

  106. He should dump her and start gardening.

    Hoes before hos.

  107. Honestly, there comes a point that if your girlfriend doesn’t get along with your friends and family, you really need to ask yourself why.

    I refuse to lose my son to some …

    He is a quality child. I spent years on him. I freakin carried him 24/7 for the first 2 years of his life.

  108. I dumped that one after 2 months when it happened to me. She didn’t make it easy, but I eventually did the right thing.

  109. So that’s two (2! hahahah!) shallow graves that Car in has to dig for Mooserpalooza…

  110. If MJ and me get half an hour and a beer with him, we can get him sorted out.

  111. I’ll see if I can get him up here that weekend.

    For the intervention.

  112. He should dump her and start gardening.
    Hoes before hos

    I could really get behind this theory. It makes sense. Plus, he might find himself a nice Laura Ingalls Wilder. Or, if he’s so inclined, a P. Allen Smith…

  113. *heads to grocery store to get Car In a box of cardboardeaux*

  114. Honestly, pursuing passionately after any other constructive activity makes a young man more interesting and stands a better chance of attracting a young woman of substance.

  115. I could really get behind this theory. It makes sense. Plus, he might find himself a nice Laura Ingalls Wilder. Or, if he’s so inclined, a P. Allen Smith…

    I’m fairly certain this is the first P. Allen Smith joke I’ve ever seen on this blog. Or, now that I think of it, anywhere, really.

  116. Who’s dat?

  117. *bings pet spa in Lapeer, sets appointment for Aug 23rd

  118. Hmm, someone managed to out-obscure seanm. Well done!

  119. He runs a garden show on at 0500 locally

  120. http://www.doggroominginlapeermi.com/

    Just down the road…

  121. I have three freakin teenagers all testing me in different ways right now.

    Been there, done that, got the t-shirt to prove it.

    This, too, shall pass. On the plus side, you’ve already got a head full of grey hairs, so you don’t have to worry about that 😝

  122. Notaboyfriend is going to show up next time and tell Car in, “Oh, I can’t stay. Your daughter just said she had a phone charger for me to borrow.”

  123. P. Allen Smith is a guy who has a show on Create TV (Public Television’s food, gardening, travel, and crafting channel) and he’s one of those Southern guys where you’re not really sure if he’s just kinda fey or totally gay.

  124. Internet says he’s married to a woman.

  125. Comment by leoncaruthers on August 12, 2017 8:28 pm
    Internet says he’s married to a woman.

    What does that have to do with what Sean said?

  126. I’m saying he’s straighter than Lyndsay Graham.

  127. P. Allen Swish.

    Southern dandy-boy. Wonderful gardener.
    You should seek out his videos and see what we’re talking about. He’s really something.

  128. If I decide to take the SB job, I should probably start a few garden pots. Any recommendations on books for beginners?

  129. Your best bet is to get to your new neighborhood, and look around to see what others are growing in containers. Visit a few nurseries and ask questions. Most books are not going to be written for your climate and conditions. If you’re renting, measure your light exposure in the area where you will be able to have pots, and go from there.

  130. Unless there’s a book called ‘container gardening in SB’ in which case, get that one.

  131. Just shop at Whole Foods, Sprouts, and Trader Joe’s like the rest of us.

  132. Ugh. Don’t bother. I’ve read it, and there’s about ten good pages of good gardening advice. The rest is just the author ranting about Richard Nixon.

  133. Unless there’s a book called ‘container gardening in SB’ in which case, get that one.

    I’m pretty sure that one is just a phrasebook of Spanish phrases to tell your illegal messican gardeners.

  134. The strawberry-cucumber water was a very good idea. Thanks, Leon.

  135. I think you have a botanic garden in SB. And probably an ag extension. Check with them for appropriate literature and advice.

  136. They don’t have pot at the botanical garden.

  137. anyone having mongolian beef? Just me?


  138. two (2! hahahah!)

    Totally heard that in the Sesame Street Count’s voice.

  139. ag extension? thought that was a midwest thing.

  140. Alex,
    Check out the county Ag office, I think every county has one, and they have classes and information on all things Ag. Very local and specific

  141. They have them in Florida and Texas too Jay

  142. And in CT too! It’s a thing everywhere.

  143. There’s a youtuber named CaliKim who’s not far from there and has a lot of good beginner content. Her strawberry crates might be a good starter project. Glad you liked the water thing, I got it from a hotel I used to stay at in Fairfax, they had a water cooler full of that in the summertime.

  144. all the city kids I know have 0 idea what to do with ag.

  145. Aggierican?

  146. Last years hot chile is hot. Hotter the second day. Tears, sweat, and stomach cramps.

  147. My addiction-tracking app added machine learning to predict likelihood of failure in the most recent update. It currently predicts a 99% chance for me.

    Is that supposed to help or demoralize?

  148. Look who stopped by work just now:


  149. Tomorrow will be hell. School starts on Monday. Managers didn’t review schedule. I’ll be cashiering ALL DAY. I have to be friendly and nice. Pray for Oso

  150. all the city kids I know have 0 idea what to do with ag.

    Silver is commonly used for jewelry, as well as medical uses.

  151. Smart metallurgy blog.

  152. Sean, does it carry plague fleas? AZ/NM

  153. Tomorrow will be hell. School starts on Monday. Managers didn’t review schedule. I’ll be cashiering ALL DAY. I have to be friendly and nice. Pray for Oso

    Six days. Six days until DEFENDERS!

  154. I didn’t taste any plague fleas.

  155. Hasenpfeiffer

  156. Gesundheit.

  157. Do you even *know* what plague fleas taste like? Well I’ll tell you.

    They taste like dusty fur, and fresh mown grass.

  158. g’nigh, shmoopshes

  159. Jay in Ames on August 12, 2017 at 9:41 pm
    anyone having mongolian beef? Just me?

    Well, I’m still kinda sore about it, myself. That Genghis Kahn was a real jerk.

  160. Mongolian beef on tortilla is yummy

  161. CoAlEx I close next Friday-Saturday-Sunday. Dan is threatening to watch Defenders without me. Did you see Punisher got moved up to November???

  162. Dr. Strange is interesting.

  163. Oso, I did not see that.

  164. Dr. Interesting is strange.

  165. I love you fuckers.

  166. November Punisher!

  167. It’s the Christmas in November!

  168. I’m crying and being really gross right now. Why does a 26 year old decide that death is better than life? Sheridan’s oldest bro was buried today. WTF is wrong with people?

  169. Entertain me. My heart is broken

  170. IDGAF was my Sheridan lifestyle. My A1C is still pretty low. Dan is breaking the law and being a dick about my health.

  171. Dan loves you and would prefer that you didn’t die. Maybe you could cut him some slack.

  172. got that right, sean.

  173. Throw me a derp I’m sinking fast
    Clutching at straws can’t make it
    Havana sound we’re trying
    hard edge the hipster jiving
    Last picture shows down the drive-in
    You’re so sheer you’re so chic
    Teenage rebel of the week

  174. Leslie Easterbrook would make a good retro BBF model. She was Callahan in the Police Academy movies. Her IMDb bio shows she isn’t the kind of actor that only works on glamour projects


  175. Everyone must be ironing their Stars And Bars flags

  176. wakey wakey 2

  177. I was about to motivate, but Moose just went to “his spot”. I could be stuck here for a while.

  178. What’s Hotspur been up to?

  179. Maybe you guys will be able to meet Notboyfriend.

    that will be fun.

  180. What’s Hotspur been up to?

    Well, since he’s near AA, he’s probably out protesting the KKK.

  181. How is a state trooper helicopter crash Trump’s fault?

  182. Good morning sugartits.

    Nothing on the agenda today. Feels awesome.

  183. Lauraw, nice.

  184. I’m still working on getting the house back up to snuff. Soon, the trebuchet team will be working again, and I’ll be feeding them. Dining room is cluttered. Also going to see what Rocketboy forgot.

  185. Next week’s BBF in the queue, probably will watch movies with Mrs. Pupster and cook out hot dogs and hamburgers for brunch.

  186. Can’t believe it’s getting close to Pumpkin chunkin’ season again.

  187. I made these and they are friggen awesome!


  188. http://tinyurl.com/lnhhfbx

  189. Ha! Pups fail.

  190. I have paid ZERO attention to the nazi deal (regardless of whether I should or not), other than psychos being psychos what do I need to know?

  191. I wouldn’t be surprised if both sides are funded by Soros.

    It looks fake to me.

  192. With watching the group of losers out there in C-ville, I am struck by the idea that they would have been doing this no matter who was president, and if we did have the White Witch as president, they would blame Ryan and McConnell. Just like Antifa would still be rioting as well.

  193. C’ville mayor is flat out blaming Trump. Of course, HE is the one tearing down the statue of Robert E Lee, which brought the protesters to town in the first place.

  194. Is it too late to send MJ a baby present?


  195. https://is.gd/Ok1ctg

  196. What? Everybody else has a life or something?

  197. I knew it was going to be a shitstorm in C’ville when Airbnb started cancelling reservations. Haven’t used Airbnb and now won’t ever.

  198. Chi, a metric shit ton of things to do. Late brunch for me, so I’m sitting here reading H2 and the Sunday book thread and searching for a new crockpot chicken recipe while eating bacon.

  199. Feels like a fall day today, a little warmer in reality but the other elements are there. Dry air, low clouds and a little blustery. I’m sipping coffee on the porch looking out at the lake and trying to decide whether to smoke a cigar with my coffee or wait till it’s done. I’m leaning toward after. Oh, I’m also reading about how Dewey Andreas is saving America from nuclear bombs in book #5: Independence Day

  200. We looked at two used cars this morning for Boy 1 who just got his license. A Subaru thing and an XTerra. No excitement for either one. Paula is going with her dad on Monday to look at a few more. So hard to find a good beater car for under 5k.

  201. She had a decent used Hyundai sedan but that was the one that got totaled last winter when the guy drove thru a stop sign. Would have worked fine to let him use it for work and school most days but she replaced it with a new Jeep Cherokee which she is hesitant to let him trash with driving around with his sweathog friends.

  202. It’s like a warm spring day here. Rained for three days in a row, threatening to do so again today. So I’m stuck inside watching Jacques Pepin & Julia Child.
    Bored, so I’m roasting garlic for a compound butter. Then I’ll make garlic bread rolls for eggplant parmesan subs.
    Woo hoo.

  203. I like that convo with the 4 year old and his celery. ^^^ Made me snort.

    In that vein, I went to church yesterday and our new priest distracted me from The Word. I couldn’t get past the inflection in his voice that told me ‘ghey’. That and the weird way he was going about preparing the host. His voice and how he almost went prostrate on the altar. Noticed others staring curiously too.

  204. Oh, and the ‘To do list’ cartoon? ^^^ Also me except I am on the internets arguing with/trolling racist assholes regarding the VA thing I haven’t been paying attention to.

  205. “hey’re Nazis. White Supremacists. In 2017. ACTUAL Terrorists. If you had something to say about protests for Black Lives Matter and women’s rights but are silent on white supremacists with torches, I beg you to reevaluate yourself.” — marching orders.

  206. My BIL came over yesterday to help me hang pictures for his parents. Amazing how homey a place can look with pictures. I prolly should hang some up here.
    In the meantime, Mr. B. is texting me aminal pictures from Yellowstone. (He is taking a side trip from his next meetings in Utah.)

  207. Nazis, white supremacists are of the left. Within the democrat family.

  208. Overcast here, but hopefully that burns off by this afternoon.

    I’m reading the Wall Street Journal and trying to figure out what I need to do today. The dishes need to be finished, trash taken out, and I should clean the bathroom. I also have to set up my new printer, print out the job offer, sign it and scan it. After that, I should gesso a couple of canvas panels so I can paint this week. Maybe a long walk in the afternoon…

  209. Things changed fast here. The blustery winds blew in a thunderstorm so I moved the party indoors. Glad I waited to ignite my cigar. Rowan is at my feet shivering and Star is hiding on the floor of the bathroom closet.

  210. We might get rain later in the week. We really…really..need some.

  211. Co Alex, regarding gesso. Is that something you do for acrylics and oils?

  212. Beasn,

    Yup. You put a couple of layers on the canvas before you paint. Originally it was a mixture of rabbit-skin glue and chalk.

  213. I went to church today. Its terrible and repetitive. Basically the same thing as last week but they changed a few quotes.

  214. Was 98 yesterday and a steam bath when I took the dogs out this am.
    Staying in the AC

  215. I’ve cleaned the kitchen (twice) a little laundry, and have been on/off working on the “work” room. It’s a big project.

    Just made some culturally appropriated Gazpacho.

  216. ba haa haaa …

    Erin is a huge football fan. Crazy, one may say. She had told her friends (guys) she didn’t know anything about football – ha ha ha …

    So now she’s doing a fantasy football thing with them …. she is so going to win.

    They do not KNOW.

  217. Devious. You’ve trained them well…

  218. She’s got a guy friend over (not the notboyfriend, but this dude has basically moved in as well) and a girlfriend, and the gal is completely bored because the two of them are talking football.

  219. I let them in on the secret, but I think they think it’s just talk

  220. She’s got a guy friend over (not the notboyfriend, but this dude has basically moved in as well)

    Yeah, that sounds like it’s not going to end well in the long run. Especially if she’s the “cool chick” who likes football.

  221. The female friend isn’t dating the guy either. I really don’t know what’s going on here. They’re just friends too.

  222. But I think you’re sorta right, and a majority of Erin’s male friends would date her in a second. The only way it works is because she won’t. date them. And they know it.

  223. The female friend isn’t dating the guy either. I really don’t know what’s going on here. They’re just friends too.

    The female friend is in love with Erin as well?

  224. Their relationships are fluid

  225. We’ll see how long it takes not boyfriend to show up today and make sure he’s not moving in on her though.

    Even though they’re just chill.

  226. Erin’s probably wondering why you’re sitting in the kitchen with coffee and a bowl of popcorn.

  227. Everyone loves Erin. She’s not my smartest knife in the drawer, but has always been very well liked by people.

  228. LOL, Coalex. If you lived closer I’d invite you over so we could enjoy the show together.

  229. Rocketboy and his girlfriend are at the Braves-Cardinals game. He was going to borrow my Braves shirt (a cool one with the Atlanta skyline made up of Braves names), and I reminded him he has one of his own. (Playoff shirt from a few years ago)

  230. I think I will get Moose groomed right Moosepalooza. I can’t guarantee he won’t just go in the lake as soon as I get him home, though.

  231. I’m really craving some Mongolian Beef right now.

    Thanks a lot Scott.

  232. *wants to meet Moose*

  233. FIL – *looking directly at me* “I’ve lived too damn long. Can you believe I will be 90 in six months?”

    Me – “Yeah, and you will 100 in ten years.”

    FIL – *makes truly frustrated scoffing noise* ..”Wo-hoe, oh I’ll be a drooling mess. That’s no way to live.”

    He’s a guy who has never been able to sit still….until age has forced him to. It’s driving him batty when he’s not nodding off.

  234. He goes in and out several times a day to his patio chair. Likes watching the hummingbirds duke it out over the feeder above his head.

  235. I went to church today. Its terrible and repetitive. Basically the same thing as last week but they changed a few quotes.

    What part of “ritual worship” do you not get?

    Also, don’t forget to show up again on Tuesday for the Feast of the Assumption. Seriously, it’s a day of obligation.

  236. Time to go build an electromagnet.

  237. looks like rocketing has a nice day to see a game. I’ve been to games there and just baked. gets hot there

  238. So I signed up for match.com, uploaded my photo, and all of a sudden I’m getting notifications about “likes”. But they’re all “A 54 year old woman in Santa Barbara likes you.” “A 48 year old woman in Thousand Oaks likes you.” “A 100 year old woman in Glendale likes you.” WTF?

  239. One of these days we’re going to discover that Leon has been secretly assembling a giant fighting robot. Probably when he’s in the middle burning Detroit to the ground with an improved flamethrower and shooting down attacking helicopters with a railgun.

  240. So far on my ‘do nothing day’ I have taken my humongous stack of recipe clippings, cards, and printouts, and winnowed, transcribed, and sorted them into a new three ring binder with twelve categories.

    I now feel that I’m the most stupendously organized human female on the planet and my life is a frictionless high-speed machine.

    *does a victory lap around the three-hole punch*

    *pretends to catch bouquets of roses*

    *Scott makes surreptitious phone call to mental hospital*

  241. Golfers in the modern era are commonly rather fit, nice-looking young fellows. So different from when I was young.

  242. heh those are the ones on tv

  243. I was a misguided yute.

    I should have been coached into playing golf.

    I failed to recognize how much money I could make for getting that stupid little ball into the hole 450 yards away in 5 strokes or less.

  244. What’s wrong with a 54 or 48 year old woman?
    The distance may be a problem, but the age shouldn’t be.

  245. Phat is at the game. I’m gonna laugh my ass off if they meet.

  246. What’s wrong with a 54 or 48 year old woman?
    The distance may be a problem, but the age shouldn’t be.

    I’m 35 and I want kids.

  247. I went to church today. Its terrible and repetitive. Basically the same thing as last week but they changed a few quotes.


    lol I love you, you douche!

  248. I make a pretty good Gazpacho for a gringo

  249. 4th grader watching baseball: Braves go from Dickey to Johnson

  250. I make a pretty good Gazpacho for a gringo

    Needs more clams.

    I resolve that this trip to MI, I will finally get my chance to try perch. Even if I have to ditch you people for an hour to go grab an entree somewhere.

  251. OK, Scott said we’ll get some on the way into MI on Friday, so that’s cool. Just got to find a place that does it well.

  252. they had perch at that restaurant we went to last time didn’t they?

  253. There was a reason I didn’t get it. It wasn’t on the menu, or they were out, or something. Can’t remember why.

  254. Gotcha, Coalex.
    I wish you happiness and success in your endeavor. Sincerely.
    You don’t want to get to my age childless and mad at yourself because of that – believe me.
    Good luck, brother

  255. can’t you just identify as female, have a kid, then switch back?

  256. Sadly, I cannot tuck as well as Miss Chelsea Manning…

  257. One of these days we’re going to discover that Leon has been secretly assembling a giant fighting robot. Probably when he’s in the middle burning Detroit to the ground with an improved flamethrower and shooting down attacking helicopters with a railgun.

    I’d just mount them on an F-150 too old to EMP.

    Like, say, the one I have.

  258. My electromagnet worked, but was woefully underpowered for the task.

    Going to have to look for old microwaves and do it right next time, like this.

  259. Chi, thanks. I’ll admit that I lose faith more each day that it will appen, especially if I take this job, but I’ll keep trying.

  260. Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never—in nothing, great or small, large or petty—never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense.

    Things mare and Churchill have said.

  261. Hmmm. American Epic Sessions coming up on PBS.
    Jack White, T Bone Burnett, Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard, Taj Mahal, Los Lobos, and a lot more. heck – a little bit of everybody.
    This might actually be watchable.

  262. Heading into the “all-star break” with a record of 15-3 and sole possession of first place after destroying the other team this morning 18-0 in just 3 1/2 innings.

    And it’s all gonna go straight to hell when we pick back up in September for the final run into November, as we can never field a full team for fall ball.

    Oh well…

  263. First teensy batch of old fashioned kosher dills starting their cure on the counter now. Yay!

    Leon, since the vegetable sugar gets eaten up by the baccilli, is it reasonable to assume that a couple little kosher dills won’t break a fast? I would think the sodium content, acidity, and beneficial bacteria would be good during the initial stages of keto, too.

  264. Fuck me.
    I shouldve known that PBA would turn this into a Jerry Lewis Telethon begging for even more of our money.

    Whatever happened to Trump defunding these pricks anyway?

  265. Ugh, it’s been a week and my professor still hasn’t posted grades for my final two classes. I hate waiting, and the longer it goes on the more nervous I get.

  266. Fermented vegetables generally won’t bring you out of ketosis unless you added sugar, Laura.

  267. Might affect autophagy because the gut is not resting, I’d imagine.

  268. MF’ing Media: Why won’t you denounce the h8ters in C’ville?
    Republican or Conservative: I denounce the h8ters in C’ville.
    MFM: Why won’t you denounce the h8ters in C’ville?
    RorC: But I just did!
    MFM: You’re just doing that for political gain.

  269. I thought autophagy only happened after the full second day of fasting. Are you fasting that long, Lauraw?

  270. Roamy, I’d tell them to go ask a democrat, since both sides are theirs, and to GFT.

    Reason #kajillion why beasn won’t be allowed to be president.

  271. I love the giant puppeh in the header.

    Read a post on facedouche about a family, who came home to a large quantity of blood all over their house. Apparently, their very large German shepherd didn’t take kindly to a burglar.

  272. No Mare, I haven’t done a good long fast in a year. I need to get back on it, my last year of school was terribly unhealthy. Even after the big stress has ended, I have still been self-indulgent and denying myself nothing. Up a size in pants, ouch.

    I thought autophagy happened earlier than that…guess I should finish reading Fung’s book, whoops.

    But first, a beer.

  273. No, no, no, that’s precisely why Beasn should be president.

  274. Bring some bacon and a frisbee, it will be fine.

  275. But roamy, I wouldn’t be as nice as Trump and look how they’re treating him. A lot of fuckers would have been fired on day one. (It’d be fire and fury behind the scenes, the likes of which the congress has never seen).
    While I’m liking Huckabee’s daughter as press secretary, I’d really like to unleash a Coulter beast on the media. Gorka is pretty awesome too (from what I’ve seen.)

  276. I would just like to state here, for the record, that I hereby denounce everyone who has ever lived and everyone else who has yet to be born, in perpetuity, for everything.

    Now, is anybody here a notary public?

  277. Time for GOT

  278. I’m having a hard time fasting and simultaneously keeping up on the dozen eggs we get every day now.

  279. electromagnetic egg cannon.

  280. Tempera paint.

  281. I’ve been working on my egg-bread recipes. Just made some LCHF chocolate chip muffins.

  282. Luthern Church Health Food?

  283. Lacey Chabert’s Hot Fudge?

  284. Colorado Alex In Exile on August 13, 2017 at 9:12 pm

    electromagnetic egg cannon

    I would SO make use of this every time my douchebag neighbor started up his leafblower. (5x a day)
    If you start a GoFundMe page, I’ll sell a kidney to send money!

  285. heh, an egg rail gun, only at the H2

  286. Lacey Chabert’s Hot Fudge?

    Oh… oh if I had that…

    electromagnetic egg cannon

    The trouble is imparting sufficient momentum to an egg without breaking it. You’d need a really long set of rails.

  287. “lol I love you, you douche!”

    that was pretty funny

    for a piece of felt

  288. Electromagnetic hard boiled egg cannon.

  289. “Comment by Colorado Alex In Exile on August 13, 2017 4:07 pm

    What’s wrong with a 54 or 48 year old woman?
    The distance may be a problem, but the age shouldn’t be.

    I’m 35 and I want kids.”

    2 words –

  290. woody

  291. allen

  292. Do you like pickled eggs, Leon? Keep in the fridge for up to 6 months.

    Beyond that, you could make a couple giant sheetpan quiches and freeze in squares to pull out as Winter TV dinners.

  293. The trouble is imparting sufficient momentum to an egg without breaking it.

    But if we plate the egg with electroless nickel, we solve the conductivity and strength problems simultaneously.

  294. To infinity and beyond! ?

  295. Sell the eggs to local teenagers–no questions asked.

  296. I’ve been studying up on perch restaurants in Ohio and Michigan.


  297. The other problem with railguns is that they scale up great, but they scale down terribly. I’d be better off building a slingshot with surgical tubing for something that size, unless the goal is a supersonic egg, which – again – is going to mean a biiiig set of rails. And a compulsator.

  298. Your goal is always a supersonic egg.

  299. Your chickens need more iron.

  300. When I was at OSU, we had a slingshot that would throw a waterbaloon a block, with enough speed to take someone from the sidewalk to the middle of the street.
    An egg would go much farther, faster(much less mass to accelerate)…

  301. Roughed out the calcs. I’m thinking that the hardened egg can handle 50 g’s, which means to get to the speed of sound we’ll need 91 m of track. Say 100 m to add some margin.

    Didn’t include drag on the egg.

  302. Subsonic eggs.

  303. Hypersonic eggs.

  304. This is what I picture Lapeerpalooza looking like:

  305. Howdy, Hostages. School starts tomorrow in Rio Rancho and Albuquerque. The Club was exactly the CF you would imagine the day before BTS at a place that sells in bulk. We actually were staffed at registers and cafe…5 of us on the floor.

  306. The eggs have gone to plaid!

  307. Didn’t include drag on the egg.


  308. My neighbors are uppity, I can’t do hypersonic.

  309. If you do hypersonic, the plasma will cook the egg as it goes.

  310. Subsonic? Pshaw. You might as well throw it.

    Like a girl.

  311. Geoff,
    “But if we plate the egg with electroless nickel, we solve the conductivity and strength problems simultaneously.”

    Then, It’s no longer an egg. It’s an egg-shaped bullet…

  312. Full Metal Ovum

  313. .45acp is subsonic, I suspect that achieving even a fraction of that muzzle velocity would suffice to deter Chi’s neighbor.

  314. Egg or egg-shaped bullet, the real question is, “Can we hit a flying pumpkin with it?”

  315. Then, It’s no longer an egg. It’s an egg-shaped bullet…

    Oh you and your quibbly semantical jargon.

    You say “egg-shaped bullet,” I say “metal-reinforced egg.” I think my version is more appropriate.

    Until we put the hypervelocity penetrator inside.

  316. hypervelocity penetrator inside

    You mom likes that.

  317. “Egg-Shaped Bullet” was panned by the critics when it came out, but it’s regarded as one of Mudhoney’s better albums nearly two decades later.

  318. Until we put the hypervelocity penetrator inside.
    Next Geoff will be saying “shaped charge”

  319. Next Geoff will be saying “shaped charge”

    I may have spent too much time working on DoD contracts…

    … and sundry moms of y’all’s acquaintance.

  320. I saw Egg Shaped Bullet open for the Hypervelocity Penetrators at The Full Metal Ovum in 1986 – wait…
    Sorry, wrong site.

  321. Persecution you must fear
    Win or lose you got to get your share
    You’ve got your mind set on a dream
    You can get it though derp it may seem now

  322. http://stiltonsplace.blogspot.com/2017/08/sorry-virginia-there-is-no-sanity-clause.html?spref=fb

    Didn’t know all the shenanigans with the permit and that the cops might have been pulled back to let “some politically useful carnage to take place.”

    Scroll down for the comment from JRMD about the city council’s actions.

  323. Full Metal Ovum is frickin’ hilarious

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