Hi weirdos. Here are a few things I would like to rate as a hostage:
TNT flooring: Meth heads that pretend to be Jesus freaks so you’ll trust them with your really big job that they swear is going to be just perfect. Will they work more than a few hours a day? No. Will they smoke meth in your house? Yes. Will you need to have the floor completely removed and done by someone else? Yes. Will the meth heads remind you of someone but you can’t quite place them? Yes.
Meth head floor installation company: 1/10, would not recommend. Do not hire this man.
LED toilet light: This has totally changed my life. Getting up to pee in the middle of the night brings a smile to my face. It’s just like being in a strip club, a hot tub, or a mid 2000s all night dance party. The lights rotate from garish red (you’ll think you’re peeing blood) to neon green (you’ll think you’re peeing green blood). Every middle of the night bathroom break is a giggle fest. Who thinks of this shit?
Dance party toilet light: 9/10 would recommend for party peeing.
Thievery Corporation–The Temple of I&I: Picked this album (yes, actual album) from a really cool record store in Indianapolis over the weekend. It’s a reggae album, so if you’re into smoking weed and chilling out this might be up your alley Hotspur. Whoops. No idea what made me think of Hotspur right then, but I can’t delete anything from this masterpiece post so we’re going to have to let that stand.
Music that make Jah happy: 10/10 would recommend for Rastafarians and Hotspur.
Joey’s World Tour: This is a youtuber that makes food review videos in his car from every goddamn chain out there. He puts up videos about 3 times a week and is apparently making a living doing so. I don’t get it, but I can’t seem to look away. I love watching him eat a Western Ranchero Triple Sauced Bacon Cheesy Jalepeno Stuffed Butter Fried Garlic Lovers Double the Beef Whopper. Sometimes he eats weird things like a jar of Nutella or really hot noodles, which is also fun. I guess its a car accident thing, but I dare you to watch a few videos and not fall in love. He’s 400 pounds of hypnotic garbage.
Human Dumpster: 12/10 would totally recommend. The comments on his videos are to die for! In this one, he actually implores his viewers to clean up their act. Too much sexual innuendo and hate going on. It’s as if he has no idea–none–about what he’s doing or saying. I bet Joey has the most blissful life imaginable. Here is a sampling from the comments… ________________________________________________________________________________________
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Fish tacos: We all know why you’re still reading this post. You think I’m going to recommend your mom for something. Well, you’re right! Here she is in all of her whorish glory!
Your mom: 10/10 would recommend.
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first?
Yes, you are first.
‘400 pounds of hypnotic garbage’ made me giggle like Carin in a skort warehouse.
That last image challenged my faith in God and any notions about the attractiveness of redheads.
She seems nice.
10/10 Would read again.
The floor thing has been a nightmare. Over 2000 feet of brand new hardwood is being taken out this week so it can be done all over again.
It’s just a huge inconvenience at this point–but they really fucked it up.
You should ask for references.
We met with them twice and have gone through the scope of work.
It’s really the steps that were skipped last time. Apparently the meth heads didn’t clean the floor very well, and they didn’t level the sub floor. It’s also in too tight. And they original didn’t finish the job.
The GC subbed to these guys so they’re footing the bill to have it redone.
Always check what drugs your contractors are on. My floor guys were on clen/tren, no risk to the work.
/kneecaps thread
/blinds self
So what’s going on today? I’m working from home because I have a strong dislike for the people I work with.
I’m about to do cals and then I’ve got a 1230 meeting. Right ear in my headset is going out so I’m borrowing the wife’s for the day.
I wish, MJ.
Leon, the trend suggests that will happen. Liberal douchebags “Find ME” first and delay parenthood. They’re lucky if they get one child in before the eggs dry up. Assuming, of course, they don’t discover they are gay or trans or whatever.
The problem is that a lot of conservatives are in the same boat.
All those women delaying marriage and family means that conservative men are left scrambling over a smaller and smaller group of women.
I’m going to run on my brand spanking new treadmill today.
And probably do some TRX ab work but nothing more.
I’ve got to go in to class in about twenty minutes. Class isn’t until 7pm, but I like working out of the office rather than trying to work from home. I’ve got a paper to write and a forecasting project to get started on, and then I’ll go to the gym around 5pm.
All those women delaying marriage and family means that conservative men are left scrambling over a smaller and smaller group of women.
Feminism has done so much evil to the world, but this one hurts a lot of men I know personally.
I’m basically screwed.
I’m a chubby nerd who’s too old. The women who are interested in me are obese, stupid, too old, or already have kids.
I’m a chubby nerd who’s too old. The women who are interested in me are obese, stupid, too old, or already have kids.
——————
No way. Refuse to accept.
Adult relationships are way better than 20s and early 30s.
MJ, the problem is that I want kids, plural. Not likely to happen with a woman in her late thirties or beyond.
That may end up being us, too. We tried for years, but we still started much too late. Should have started right after the wedding.
Women have been lied to. They see older moms and think it’s going to be easy to have them when they want. When they’re ready. They also decry the “young moms” who aren’t as mentally prepared as they are “I’ll be a much better mom because I’m more mature”.
Little do they realize that nature is a bitch who doesn’t give a shit about your timelines.
Start hitting on girls in their 20s, all their contemporaries are gay or video-game obsessed anyhow. Problem solved.
No one ever mentions the 40 grand the older moms dropped on fertility treatments.
Start hitting on girls in their 20s, all their contemporaries are gay or video-game obsessed anyhow. Problem solved.
You’d think it would be that easy, but it isn’t.
The “party through your 20’s” is a mistake. I know a lot of people who are falling for this.
I also know a few young couples who are married but in no rush to have kids. They may be married, but they still have the “let’s wait until the perfect time” thing going on.
*shrugs
You have it all wrong.
Party through your 20s and 30s.
I also know a few young couples who are married but in no rush to have kids. They may be married, but they still have the “let’s wait until the perfect time” thing going on.
This is bag of hammers dumb, but they never listen.
The thing that might have worked on me was seeing people with children genuinely enjoying them. Church helped a lot there, but we were already trying at that point.
You have it all wrong.
Party through your 20s and 30s.
Then get a dog!
The problem is that young women in their twenties are told to focus on their careers and not jump into having a family. So when they end up with a dipshit who won’t commit, or who has serious flaws, there’s no pressure to move on. Instead they stay with him for three, four, six years and hope that he’ll grow up.
Kids are really crazy today. By the time I was about 21 or so I was honestly pretty much “partied” out. I didn’t want to keep on going out to bars, etc. I wanted to grow up to some extent.
It is pretty common to have these 23, 24, 27 … say to me “I want to enjoy life while I’m young, this is what I’m supposed to do at this age …”
And I wonder WHERE the fuck they got that idea? I mean, it’s not as if they have some wonderful life experiences … they’re just going out getting drunk.
We have Benny because we weren’t pregnant yet and wife was really suffering.
That’s the other thing that might change a few hearts and minds. Testimonials from women and suffering through or having suffered through the heartbreak of infertility.
I chose 60# because it’s approximately the weight of a full suit of plate armor as well as the average load carried by infantry in Afghanistan.
Heh. If only. The average load is a lot closer to 90#, and 130# isn’t unheard of.
And I wonder WHERE the fuck they got that idea? I mean, it’s not as if they have some wonderful life experiences … they’re just going out getting drunk.
Friends, How I Met Your Mother, etc. Pop culture tells them it’s what you do.
That, and Facebook/Instagram, which convinces them that everyone else’s life is so much more interesting and exciting than their’s.
Heh. If only. The average load is a lot closer to 90#, and 130# isn’t unheard of.
This is half our problem these days. You can’t strap 90# of crap onto a guy and then send him into the fight in mountainous terrain against light infantry. It did’t work for Alexander and it won’t work for us.
The problem is that young women in their twenties are told to focus on their careers and not jump into having a family.
You’d think the “you’ll never need to study for or take a test, or get up early to go to work, you can read at your leisure, and you’ll be loved and cherished every day of your life” would be an easy sell, but apparently it just doesn’t compete with working your ass off for $$ and dating assholes.
A lot of them grow up around divorced women, many of whom are miserable and fill their heads with stories about how they’ll eventually be abandoned and need to be able to take care of themselves.
Heh. If only. The average load is a lot closer to 90#, and 130# isn’t unheard of.
I figured as much. 63# is the nominal average, but that only covers what’s issued and must be carried, before you get to what a soldier specifically needs.
If you get beyond mounted plate mail, it’s too fucking heavy.
I think it is social media – a lot. Everyone is always snapping this and that picture of them supposedly having “fun”. They’re always chasing the dragon.
Meh. I quickly figured out that I had fun maybe ONCE out of every 5 times we went out. To bars and what not. I was ready to give up.
Grrrrr
Compressor died right before I left for Atlanta. Ordered a new one. Told them they had to notify me before delivery so I could be sure someone would be there. Supposed to deliver on Wednesday and call one hour before. Get a call at 10:00 that they tried to deliver at 9:15. Call to track down driver. He’s already 40 miles away.
Call dispatcher.
Me: You were supposed to call before delivery.
Disp: Hunh.
Me: Can you get him to drive back by on the return trip?
Disp: That’s not up to me.
Me: I’m out of work until I get this thing, please call him and see.
Disp: ………
Me: When can I get this?
Disp: “We can deliver next Tuesday, maybe.”
Me: What time?
Disp: Between 8:00 and 5:00, probably, I don’t really know.
Me: Seriously?
I’m so fucking tired of dealing with incompetent assholes.
Hell, I get sucked in by it sometimes. And I know that the people are full of shit. I’ve had friends who spent their twenties partying, traveling the world, having wild sexual adventures, etc., etc., etc. Most of the are screwed up. They’re depressed, ill, working a string of menial jobs, it’s really quite sad.
Baby girl sleeping in my arms >>> any night of drinking/sex/gaming/etc.
At least until I start to need to pee.
I hate people too, pepe.
http://www.globalsecurity.org/military/library/report/call/call_01-15_ch11.htm
That sucks, Pepe. Can you chase down the truck and run him off the road?
Car in wouldn’t be sick of partying if she lived somewhere fun.
Any word on when, or if, MJ is growing up?
I’m not growing up, I hate grown ups.
*joins dart league again
Dart leagues are a scam.
true, but they are a good excuse to drink tequila with friends who don’t like tequila.
laura and Sean
There’s a little bird sitting on the pea fence, plucking and tearing at the tendrils and tops of the vines, and causing them to fall off the fence.
I just. I don’t…what the fuck is going on here.
#killnature
doesn’t scott have a pellet gun? seems like a good time to practice.
I rescued ANOTHER hummingbird from my house this morning.
Xbrad, it’s a well known issue, but no one wants to be the one to assume risk by telling soldiers to cut down the crap that they carry.
Laura, is it a yellow bird, with a yellow bill?
Alex, you’re a smart guy.
I’m an idiot, as we all know, yet somehow I managed to get lucky in love my whole life.
Put your brains to work! You can do it.
I just went out there. The vines are half on the ground again. It was the cardinals. Evidently now they can’t even wait for the pods to form before picking at the vines.
It’s raining, everything is a wet mess, and the vines are so turgid (SYWM) that you can’t even pick them off the ground without them cracking.
GODDAMMIT, MARE.
If I can get an intelligent good looking woman, anyone can.
That was 700 years ago, Hotspur. It’s different now.
At car dealership, getting car serviced.
(Have fun with the low-hanging fruit, you degenerates 😜)
How did you convince your wife to marry you? I’ve always wondered that.
http://mobile.wnd.com/2017/06/no-refugees-no-terror-for-poland-hungary/
Hey, CoLex, still job hunting?
I hear there’s an opening in Augusta.
Xbrad, I actually interviewed with Pluribus last Thursday for a position in DC.
GTFOOH!
Looks like there’s another opening.
The Poles refused after the Germans told them that the immigrants needed space for their natural development.
Yes, but it’s at Fort Gordon. I’ve been to Fort Gordon, so I know better than to apply for it.
I think they only hire lesbians anyway.
What? Alex definitely likes girls. He just needs to identify as a lesbian (and maybe drive a Subaru)!
That’s the other thing that might change a few hearts and minds. Testimonials from women and suffering through or having suffered through the heartbreak of infertility.
If you wanted to troll the left, these would make some good commercials. Have a middle-aged woman talk about how she thought that she had forever, and how she spent years focused on her career, and now she regrets the time that she wasted.
*starts “Go Fund Me” to buy roofies and duct tape for CoAlex*
Be careful, chicken fondlers. Maybe Oschi was trying to save you, Carin.
http://tinyurl.com/ybo75wks
The heat has been on all day.
On the street?
In the house.
On every beat?
Inside your head
You can win or lose.
Quick! Shut up!
Hold my beer http://tinyurl.com/y7eww6t7
That’s the chance you take.
Just looked out and three rabbits were havin’ a party in and around Laura’s garden.
It ended badly for two of them.
You could have at least let him finish.
Gonna have to beef up my physical barriers.
why isn’t laura gunning them down?
Oh, I def can, with the .22. Got one a couple seasons ago. But what he keeps by the door now is this airgun that I have never used or practiced with. Maybe we’ll get to that this week some time.
You know what works great to keep critters away? Newfies.
I have a spare if you want one.
Gamo pellet guns are strange, it takes a while to learn how to hold them properly.
No more dogs for a while.
Plus, if the coyotes that continually range on our property aren’t enough deterrent, I rather doubt a dog will help much. And, I’d have to leave the dog outdoors. With the coyotes.
Eh. Moose is a big dog that poops and pees everywhere. He’s pretty much marked everywhere that’s important, and lesser animals have been scarce. Last night he decided that he needed to sit by the chicken coop and bark for a while. I was ok with that.
Tool is TOMORROW NIGHT. I’m waiting until tomorrow to get excited.
Good news. Evidently I sounded psychotic enough to get the freight company to reconsider. They convinced the driver to come back through Magdalenaville and drop off the compressor. It took 3 minutes. I have a pickup with a flatbed on it. I just back up to his truck and we wheel it across on a pallet jack.
Hopefully I can get it set up tomorrow or the next day. Depends on #1 son’s schedule.
Carin, have an awesome time!! You’re going to jump up and shake ass and have waaaayyy more fun than everybody else at the same show!!
It pays to be crazy once in a while, pepe!
I’m going with a work friend and two of my kids (kids will be on lawn and I’ll be row 20 !) but I will be the most excited of my group, for sure. I don’t think any of them are really prepared for my fandom. Sean went to see them and said they were plodding (I don’t know how long ago). I can see how a non-fan would see it that way. Their music isn’t … as they say … easily accessible.
You can’t throw panties on the stage from row 20. You only live once!
Leon can design a panty cannon by tomorrow.
I’m always crazy, J’Ames. That’s why Penelope usually deals with people. The older I get, the lower my bullshit tolerance is. :)
THIS time you let the freak flag fly, and it paid off!
Tennis ball cannon? It could work.
Pepe is my hero.
For Laura and Mrs. Jimbro
https://themagentaemergencynurse.wordpress.com/2017/02/18/dear-america-you-need-to-be-nice/
A fire powered panty cannon,
Wiserdude – wasn’t able to listen to your show today or yesterday so maybe you covered this:
http://ussanews.com/News1/2017/06/03/trans-girl-makes-no-effort-to-transition-sweeps-actual-girls-track-meets-brags-about-it/
This is more effed up than carin throwing her skorts at some dude with a tool – or Colex dating mj’s mom – or mj actually dating a human female (let alone impregnating one) – or Pendejo licking his armpits… Pepe threatening to bludgeon the delivery guy to death… J’ames refusing a
Pizza on Friday
Scott scamming someone –
Me being rational –
.
.
.
.
Margaret Court was right. Reap what you sow. WGAF? (I could’ve been NSA, but NOOOO my eating disorder and subsequint treatment was “suspect”)
A repurposed potato cannon with pantyhose “eggs” as sabots would work fine.
Ace Hardware opens at 8. Should have it ready by 9. Bring AquaNet, it’ll need propellant.
Hmmm, trebuchet panty thrower…
Oso can’t be NSA, she looks you in the eyes when she talks to you.
TFW an actual honest to god strategist asks your opinion on something.
Why is this post deader than Hillary’s vagina?
Maybe if you derp together
You can make the changes in our hearts
And if you derp together, you can change us
Just where should you start?
New one’s up. Come appreciate it!