MMM 270: No naked chicks

I really meant to take a picture of the new chicks out in the barn and have “naked chicks, above the fold!” as a scare title, but then we’d be waiting another half hour.

Let’s just pretend I did that and it was hilarious.

Pretty smile.  Pretty girl.

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Seems like a good way to bite your tongue.

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Great legs, tummy, and butt, but I have no idea what she looks like.

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This might be a dude.

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This probably isn’t.

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Nice quads.

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Wrong shoes for the gym.

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I think this is Jamie Eason’s ass.

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You see that tattoo, that’s a damned signal.  DO NOT TOUCH!

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And the week begins.  Stay frosty.

114 Comments

  1. Shoes chick is probably a body builder. Swimsuit division. that’s what the chick from my gym wears to practice posing.

    I think it’s silly.

    If “practicing posing” is part of your sport there is something wrong.

  2. Farts

  3. Yeah, “figure athletes” wear heels for the same reason that women in general do. It’s a competition, sure, but it’s not a sport.

  4. I just don’t like it when they get in my way at the gym.

  5. I’m probably running the flamethrower on Wednesday if anyone wants to come watch.

  6. *gets in Car in’s way, sweats on the bench, doesn’t wipe it up

  7. What was the grill brand the w’s were looking at? My mom is looking for a new one.

  8. Broil King. Lowes has them.

  9. Yeah, was just looking there, Thanks!

  10. “This might be a dude.”

    that made me laugh

  11. http://bit.ly/2oibtvE

  12. As long as you’re not prancing around in clear plastic heels, J’ames, we’re good.

  13. We got a Broil King for camp. It replaced a cheap ass ghetto gas grill that hardly worked. Broil King is really a great grill

  14. Thanks jimbro. At $100 less than the Weber, it’s one to look at.

  15. Avoid stainless steel if you can.

  16. Really. Thought that would be better, since it will be outside. My stainless is still shiny, but the guts are all rusty (I bought a cheapo, won’t do that again!)

  17. According to Meathead stainless is less durable.

  18. Google – understanding stainless steel Meathead

    Don’t know how to link on phone

  19. Heh, I can never link on the phone, either.

    http://amazingribs.com/BBQ_buyers_guide/understand_stainless_steel.html

  20. “This might be a dude”

    Might?

  21. You see that tattoo, that’s a damned signal. DO NOT TOUCH!

    To guys. She probably lets girls touch her all they want.

  22. Does (s)he interest you?

  23. Nope.

  24. Sorry, that was for Jewstin.

  25. OK, I just got a machete and it’s the greatest thing ever.

  26. No more problem customers?

  27. How did you live without one?

  28. She lived as a savage.

  29. What do you use that for? I have a weed wacker … which I hate. But unless that is easier …

  30. Obviously, you need a scythe.

  31. leon wanted a scythe so he’d have an excuse to wear his holocaust cloak out in the yard.

  32. I use it for things I want to machete at ground level. Weed whacker is noisy and I hate it. That thing starts every time and cuts just as cleanly. No good near fence lines… but neither is the whacker.

  33. I prefer the grass whip to a real scythe, I can switch hands and grip when needed.

  34. I second the recommendation for the grass whip. I think it works faster than the weed whacker. Mind your legs. It’s sharp.

  35. Bring out your dead!

  36. roamy is on twitter now

  37. It was utterly perfect outside today, and I was stuck in here for all of it.

  38. Grass whip.

    That’s just fun to say.

  39. MJ, how many grass whips do you have shoved up your ass?

  40. Laura, I got the seeds, many thanks!

  41. 1.

    It’s a Monday.

  42. Blaze it.

  43. Orange Whip? Orange Whip? 3 Orange Whips.

  44. If 4chan can keep finding Shia LaBeouf, why don’t they find the Facebook murderer?

  45. Hey man, thank yourself! It’s your own overwhelming generosity, almost literally bouncing back on you. ;)

  46. Jay, believe it or not, they’re looking.

  47. Someone described them as “Weaponized Autism” which sounds about right.

  48. They have a lot of dox threads on antifa/”nazi punchers” too.

  49. *clicks stopwatch*

    ALRIGHT! Good pause, everybody. You all showed a lot of restraint.

  50. *cough

  51. *takes a shower*

    Okay, I get the hint.

  52. You can’t take a shower without doing 10 sit ups first.

    New house rules.

  53. High taxes
    Shitty streets and roads
    Oppressive regulation
    Wasteful govt. spending
    Liberals

    What more could you want?

  54. Your mom on a futon.

  55. Michigan roads were really shitty.

  56. Yep.

  57. No load limits + salt from under Detroit.

  58. That’s what Pay said.

  59. Your Mom has no load limit.

  60. I’m starting to wonder if there’s some Evil Make-A-Wish Foundation out there. All goateed employees…

  61. I see pure evil.

  62. A face only a mother Grendl could love.

  63. Chelsea is past her Sell By date. Put her in the dumpster.

  64. Just think, that cover photo is done with professional make up, photographer’s lighting and a dab or two of photoshop after the fact for good measure.

    IOW, that’s not the face you see on the pillow in the morning

  65. Bubba’s been out of office for 16 years. Will we have to endure the Obama sluts in 2033?

  66. It’s a face you see in a zoo, next to a carrot vending machine.

  67. Bush daughters have first dibs.

  68. Will we have to endure the Obama sluts in 2033?

    They’ll be twerking in hip-hop videos before 2019 is upon us.

  69. The Bush daughters seem to have kept their heads down and focused on their own lives. Good for them.

  70. I would throw carrots at her because she looks like a biter.

  71. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/apr/17/run-for-life-and-cake-longer-lifespan-jogging-skort

    *walks away, whistling…*

  72. Bullshit.

    #bigjointreplacement

  73. Running doesn’t always make you live longer

    http://www.wbur.org/news/2017/04/15/vanessa-marcotte-arrest

    Poor young woman was killed less than a mile from my friend’s home. It’s pretty woodsy in his neighborhood, most of that town really. No pictures of the alleged killer who had his DNA lodged under her fingernails nor mention of his immigration status…odd, huh?

  74. A ‘dab or two’ of photo-editing? Yeah, no. I can see a bunch of stuff wrong in that pic. The tee-shirt folds are ‘shopped, especially, to flatten her belly and streamline her sides. Hips cut off/ shrunk. Shit ton of photo editing. She hasn’t been that skinny since 2008.

  75. You can still see her weenus too

  76. They should have made her teeth smaller.

  77. laura,
    Her face also looks…wrong. Like the two halves don’t match.

  78. They should have made her weenus smaller.

  79. Nobody gets abducted from the free weights section in the gym.

  80. “A face only a mother Grendl could love.”

    hahahaaahahaaaa –
    my next bulldog i want to name Grendel –

    o’course he/she will be smarter than Chauncey…

    *i know – water wet… blah blah*

  81. Her wenus looks fine. Can’t fault it. Quite robust, for a shortish lady.

  82. OK, it’s early, but I was up since wee hours. Can’t keep my eyes open. Goodnight folks.

  83. The left side of her face looks wrong. Like it’s swollen or something.

  84. That chelsea picture looks like she wants to eat small children.

  85. **pretend I put that clip of John Belushi shouting in horror from “Animal House” because I’m too lazy to go look for it.**

  86. She’ll eat big children.

  87. Jenna Bush has been co-hosting with Kathie Lee while Hoda is out on maternity leave. Her token NBC job works, because people like her.

  88. Wow, the 10th anniversary of the Virginia Tech shooting was yesterday. Doesn’t seem like it’s been that long since Mr. RFH was yelling at his dad about it.

  89. 10 years? No way!!! TBH the TFG presidency was a blur to me.

  90. For those who don’t know the story.

    Blacksburg had another shooting earlier that school year, must have been August. Some guy escaped the hospital after killing one of the security guards, killed a cop near Virginia Tech. The whole place went on lockdown. So here’s my FIL with the church’s collection, trying to get into the bank, knocking on the doors until they let him in. “Sir, we’re closed, there’s a gunman on the loose.” “I gotta make the deposit.” (Was he being stubborn or hard-of-hearing, your guess is as good as mine, God rest his soul.)

    Fast forward to April. FIL with the collection again, knocking on the bank’s locked doors until the president of the bank himself unlocked the door and let him in. The tellers are huddled behind the counters or are hiding in the vault. This time they tried to talk him into staying and taking cover with them. “Nope, I got things to do.”

    Mr. RFH: “Dad, the next time you go to the bank and the doors are locked when they’re supposed to be unlocked? GO THE HELL HOME!!!!:

  91. Jeez, Roamy, your FIL was like the Jessica Fletcher of Blacksburg.

  92. Swimming in the slurry
    Burning in the heat
    Wind blown is this weather
    I derp what you secrete
    I climb this highest derrick
    This circus has no prayer
    No UFO to save us
    And do we really care

  93. Re: Chelsea Clinton and the attempt to make her politically viable

    Turd + polish = shiney turd

    oh, and…

    Obvious Photoshopping + not a lot to work with = hilarity

    Read the comments after clicking on that tweet, my favorite, “she looks like she just gazed into the Ark of the Covenent.”

  94. This will be The Summer Of Chelsea!

    Chelsea at Coachella!

    Chelsea at Burning Man!

    Chelsea at Talladega!

    Chelsea eating fried something at the Iowa State Fair

    &c

  95. wakey wakey

  96. I’m hoping Sweasel will do something with that Chelsea pic like she did the last one.

  97. polishing a chelsea
    http://bit.ly/1gqk8QE

  98. Please, no Chelsea at the Iowa State Fair. It’s not an election year, so we shouldn’t have to put up with it.

    I will be there, this year.

  99. Heh, “I’ve seen less clumsy product launches on QVC.”

  100. Chelsea Clinton: Threat or Menace?

  101. I would do a poat but I’m out of bandwidth.

  102. Plus, I have to go make today my bitch. Coffee is almost all consumed.

  103. Still some dreges lift … liked this comment on twitter:

    “Mom did everything and did it all awfully; daughter does nothing but does it perfectly.”

  104. Is anyone doing a poat? If not, I can throw one up.

  105. Throw away Alex.

    I suppose we need a comma up there?

  106. This poat closed. You go nao!

  107. https://thehostages.wordpress.com/2017/04/18/tuesday-emergency-poat/

  108. Picked up taxes from CPA, got checks from Credit Union, haircuts with little guy at barbershop then off to the Post Office to mail the returns. All while hoping the office doesn’t need me urgently


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