We’re in the middle of our annual membership drive here at the Hostages and so far it’s been a big disappointment. “Big disappointment”. Those are words most hostages have heard directed at them, mostly as kids, and with a few rare exceptions, not as adults. Now we get to direct that phrase at others. And by others I mean politicians. And the guy who sold you the “Herbal Viagra” behind the Quik E Mart. That shit’s like Russian Roulette…it’s either Limp Bizkit or you’re calling your doctor after 4 hours which is really closer to 6 or 7 because you really weren’t sure exactly when you took it and really weren’t keeping track of elapsed time until you couldn’t buckle your seatbelt in the car and you really didn’t want to all the doctor and, oh Lord, Why am I such a big disappointment? Join us next month for our pledge drive. We’ve got some really handy tote bags* that are a way for you to show your support for the Hostages in a practical, yet not ostentatious way.
*Tote bags only available at the Platinum Pledge Level
For better or worse, we’ve all known a super freak.
L to R: Trump, The Left (Where do I get myself a mask like that?)
How cold was it last weekend? This cold
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