New Year’s Resolutions

What day is it?

Let us get our gameday faces on and celebrate.

 

 

This the thread where you can document and share your resolutions.  Allow me to inspire and motivate.

 

…or boobs.

 

 

 

291 Comments

  1. I resolve to not play Keno

  2. First?

    AND MY BIRTHDAY…

    Which my son woke me at 6 AM because he was hungry.
    yay…

    I am so old…

  3. And I resolve to take my tree down today

  4. https://is.gd/Tpkk0e

  5. I resolve to let those nice people out of my basement someday

  6. I resolve to finally give your mom the twenty I promised her…over and over

  7. I resolve to avenge Roamy’s disappearance.

  8. Happy birthday, Mr Science, or as your parents call it, the last minute tax break.

  9. Yeah…Dad did say that. Mom had been in labor since the 30th, though, so for her it just the first time I let her down by being late.

  10. It’s not Epiphany yet. Tree stays up until Christmas is over.

  11. I ain’t Catholic. Tree comes down because I have someone to watch my son today while I put it away.

  12. Comment by Car in on December 31, 2016 9:48 am

    I have a long history of putting things in a closet and forgetting about it. Nail the door shut.

    ===========

    How is your Grandma/those kittens/your 6th child??????

  13. LauraW, I just got your comment. I laughed so hard imagining that that my son came over to see what was going on

  14. I was speaking for my house, Birthday Boy/Tax Break.

  15. We’re having mussels, crab legs, asparagus, corn bread, and maybe some wine tonight.

  16. I resolve to occasionally say something funny at this shithole dump.

  17. I am going to miss ESPN today.

  18. It’s my Birthday and I will not tolerate this level of insubordin…Oh wait, yes I will.

    Good on you, Leon. Good for you.

  19. I’m actually headed to a birthday party for a 1yo in a little bit.

  20. Speaking of the epiphany, what the fuck is that?

  21. Rhonda Rousey got whupped again last night.

    She won 11 of her first 15 fights in under a minute, and now she stinks.

    It’s almost as if she woke up an entire generation of badasses.

  22. The Epiphany feast celebrates when the three Magi came to visit Baby Jesus and give him the gold, frankincense, and myrrh. The feast is 12 days after Christmas, and closes the traditional “12 Days of Christmas”. I believe that the current scholarship on this event is that it occurred when Jesus was about 2 years old, but occurred at roughly that time on the actual calendar based on contemporary events in the Gospel account.

  23. Three Vagi?? Gold frankfurters? What what?

    Kind of crazy cult are you in, man?

  24. OK.

    It’s cold but dry today, roads are clear of snow but have some icy patches. I’m going to fire up the race car and take a lap before kickoff.

  25. Also, in a surprise upset, Miliana surges overnight to win BBF round B.

    Congratulations!

    https://is.gd/1MGQxi

  26. I resolve to stop giving into certain “sprees.”

    *cough*

    Has Roamy shown up yet?

  27. I usually take my tree down after The Epiphany, however, we bought our tree in the first shipped batch and it was drrrrrrry. Had to take it down for safety reasons.

    Also, COCK!

    I don’t know what I’m saying.

  28. You are not fooling anybody, Mare.

  29. Epiphany us also when some catholics and orthodox tradionally mark their doors and entrances with chalk and pray that no evil will enter.

    The workers who installed my sliding door kind of rubbed that out on that frame. Probably heathens who didn’t know better.

  30. I resolve to occasionally say something funny at this shithole dump.

    ———

    Me too!

    *hears sad trombone music in background*

  31. I rubbed one out on your Mom.

  32. Where the f is Roamy?

  33. Yes, Mare, where IS Roamy?

  34. Good Rocket Scientists are hard to find, ya know!

  35. I think Miliana is devastatingly cute.

    Also, why the hell do these idiot college footballers make a good play, then get the unsportsmanlike conduct penalty for jawing right after? So much stupid…

  36. Tex, I make the following statement about 60 times per season.

    “All you did is make a tackle/catch/first down/etc. Get your fuckin ass back in the huddle and play.”

    It’s rediculous what these emos make a huge production over these days. I blame Ikky Woods.

  37. They’re emulating the professional idiots in the NFL. Even when I catch HS football highlights on the local news I see them doing shit that’s borderline taunting after big plays.

  38. Anyone has her phone number? Can someone please call her?

  39. Comment by Tex Lovera on December 31, 2016 12:06 pm

    I think Miliana is devastatingly cute.

    =========

    Doesn’t do a thing for me. Maybe it’s the dowdy way they dress her in those commercials.

  40. I just texted Roamie.

    Mare, can you hear the phone beeping?

  41. Roamie texted back one word. “COCK”, so I’m still not sure.

    I’m calling the FBI.

  42. I resolve to only play Keno with Car in’s tips.

  43. One must truly marvel at MJ’s commitment to his “mare” character for so long simply to sate his bloodlust.

    Are we sure “mare” and Cyn didn’t meat-up earlier this year?

  44. Scott, I watched the video of that fight on Youtube. It was a painfully bad performance. What the hell has she been doing for the past year if not training?

  45. She was paid $3 million for that.

  46. Are we sure “mare” and Cyn didn’t meat-up earlier this year?

    https://is.gd/dIBb1U

  47. https://is.gd/UQTvZo

  48. https://is.gd/e5T0Ve

  49. http://tinyurl.com/jk6odg5

    Tactical Yoga Pants.

    No. Just… no.

  50. Tushar, Roamy and her family went on a cruise for Christmas. She should be getting home right about now.

    *throws ringing phone in toilet*

  51. Jeez, Mare got the whole family. That’s just mean.

  52. https://is.gd/SfDtP2

  53. https://is.gd/eFes1y

  54. *shoves tiger suit under sofa*

    What?

  55. https://is.gd/OMBiRj

  56. https://is.gd/bsalne

  57. >>Are we sure “mare” and Cyn didn’t meat-up earlier this year?

    There is photographic evidence that they may have met, but the photo appears to be an old one, when both were younger.

  58. Afternoon fine folks. And scott.

    The fuck is with that OSU garbage at the top of the page? Gross.

  59. “Tactical” yoga pants

    -trendy
    -possibly encouraging more women to investigate shooting sports
    -significant potential for abuse by the wrong clientele

  60. -significant potential for abuse by the wrong clientele

    This. They should be licenseable only.

  61. Unconcealed carry licenses.

  62. Yoga pants and bikinis. They should only be available in certain sizes.

  63. When the LSU-Louisville game ended they returned to the regularly scheduled programming…which was a half hour infommercial for the Nuwave Oven Pro Plus cooking system. They’re the leader in portable induction cooking technology.

  64. if we field the Victoria’s secret assault team, we could easily distract the enemies.

    of course, to distract the goat humpers, we’d need the hollyweird gay boy team.

  65. of course, to distract the goat humpers, we’d need the hollyweird gay boy team.

    Nah. You just need…… http://imgur.com/a/kiHB8

  66. Is it 2017 somewhere yet? Like Sydney Australia or some rock in the Pacific Ocean? It better be by the time I get home from picking the kid up from flipping patties at Mickey D’s cus I’m cracking a beer then.

  67. It’s already 2017 in lots of places.

    https://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/?sort=2&low=c

  68. Sweet!

  69. The funeral is done as of five hours ago. As The Dude would say, “fuck it, let’s go bowling”.

    Now if I could just get breathing room where I’m not having to feel like I need to be moved out tomorrow…

  70. I survived three kids in Oregon, but holy cow this cold is kicking my ass.

  71. Hang tough, Brother.

  72. Things seemed to work out alright for the Dude in the end.

    Even with the Jesus

    https://is.gd/pOL5lr

  73. https://is.gd/hgdsxB

  74. https://is.gd/hgdsxB

    Or, Alexa, we want some vinyl:

    https://is.gd/TDZGb1

  75. Brother Cavil, just one day, one CF at a time. 2017 is going to be a good year for you! Meet it, it’s coming toward you.

  76. Why don’t I get paid for my philosophical wisdom and clever use of letters? Why??

    But seriously, Brother Cavil, 2017 is going to be a good one!

  77. Ha! Everyone keeps telling me that…here’s hoping and praying they’re right!

    Now if I can just figure out where dad put his keys before going to the hospital that day I’d be all set…

  78. Greetings, people who are wearing diapers as part of their Baby New Year costume and people who are wearing diapers because they’re Hotspur.

  79. Man, Brother, isn’t it true the little things can really throw you when you’re just trying to get through to the next day?

    My Dad said (OFTEN), “This too shall pass.” A good ol’ biblical saying to repeat…often.

  80. Lol, good one, Sean! Wait, aren’t I about Hotspur’s age?

  81. I wasn’t aware you were anywhere near 90, mare.

  82. Mare, spur is old enough to be your daddy.

  83. At the Times Square festivities once you’re crammed in the pens after passing by security it’s impossible to get back in if you leave to pee because of the crowds. As a result adult disposable diapers are both a fashion item and a necessity. Or so I’ve heard.

  84. When Hotspur studied the civil war, it was under the heading of ‘current affairs’

  85. WooHoo! Home from work, watching football. Go Bucks!!!

  86. When dirt wants to make a point about something else being old, it says “Old as Hotspur.”

  87. Greetings, people who are wearing diapers as part of their Baby New Year costume

    Old Year 2016 is actually George R. R. Martin moonlighting. Discuss.

  88. PSA if you are a cat. Don’t meow while partially submerged in water.

    https://is.gd/pYxaZF

    The above link is aww, rather than ‘whose turn is it to murder Tushar?’

  89. Happy Birthday Mr Science!

  90. If you’re looking for a good movie to watch, Criminal is the HBO movie tonight.

  91. I’m watching The OSU play like a bunch of sofa kings that need a safe space for Anti-Trumpers, but have a candlelight vigil for a fucking jihadi.

  92. Yeah, I’m waiting for OSU to wake the fuck up

  93. Ha! Oso! Read my mind!

  94. Interception! Not that Ohio will capitalize but I enjoyed yelling and having my cat put his ears back and meow.

  95. My Dad said (OFTEN), “This too shall pass.” A good ol’ biblical saying to repeat…often.

    Yeah, folks in my family are fond of that little cliche. My response is always, “But not quickly.”

  96. Mom story, DRINK! My bro posted a pic of Lee Trevino side by a pic of my mom. Oso’s mom: Wow! Lee is looking really old and fat. (She didn’t realize she was old and fat Lee Trevino)

  97. I H8 the blah blah that God’ll never give you more than you can handle. I think He has more faith in me, than I have in Him at times.

  98. Came home from my evening walk to find a note in my door. Landlord’s son asking me to call him and to not give his dad a ride if asked. Landlord has fallen off the wagon and admitted to driving drunk. (I actually spoke to him one night last week when he came home and he was hammered) Hopefully there’s no drama.

  99. God will never give you more than He thinks you can handle.

    Of course, he does think you should probably do some squats just to be on the safe side.

  100. Yeah the “God will never you more than you can handle” thing is BS. The more accurate is “God will never give you more than He can handle”.

  101. ugh, that’s a tough one, CoAlex. Hard to refuse a ride for doing the right thing.

  102. Meh, still think Penn State should be there.

  103. Bcoch, you and Dan are both able to give it up to God, than I am. Takes me awhile to get to Thy will be done, type of praying. Work in progress.

  104. I’m confused. Why should you NOT give him a ride? I mean, if he’s been driving drunk, wouldn’t it be a good idea to give him a ride? You know, to keep him from driving himself.

  105. Heh: Cleveland/Ronda Rousey

  106. Son is hoping CoAlEx is being the gatekeeper and putting daddy’s sobriety on CoAlEx’s shoulders.

  107. He may have had his keys taken away and wants to go out and get more booze. That would be my guess.

    If you want to have some fun, Google AA in your area, look for a place where they have meetings on Saturday nights, and take him there if he asks for a ride.

  108. Actually, scratch that last thing I said. It might very well piss him off. And it’s not your responsibility.

  109. Spoke with son on the phone. He’s disabled all the cars, so dad can’t drive anywhere. He’s trying to keep dad from going out and buying more booze, I think. Nearest liquor store is about a mile and a half away, so it’s not like landlord can’t just walk there and back.

  110. Watching women fight like that is sick. No helmets. No padding. No limits. Savage.

  111. 👊🏻 Sean!!! Daddy’s sobriety is on daddy. Not CoAlEx or son.

  112. This is between dad and son, not me. I told his son that I wouldn’t give landlord a ride, so I won’t. Son lives close enough that he can drive out to help landlord if necessary.

  113. They signed up for it, I’m all for equality.

    Some of those ladies are tougher than guys.

  114. Same with men. But the women, uffffffff.

  115. Mare,

    You’re correct. It’s much more civilized when it involves baby oil and string bikinis.

  116. Holly Holmes destroyed Ronda Rousey. In the meantime, HH and RR have both looked into the abyss and the abyss looked back and said FU

  117. Back in the day, I dated a Golden Gloves guy. Barbaric. I H8 the “Sweet Science”. H8 UFC. H8 WWE. I can barely watch any of it.

  118. It’s gross. I would never watch.

  119. They train for it, martial arts, boxing, etc. They take a beating in practice too. It’s brutal, yes. I respect them a lot.

  120. Haha, just saw a preview for Amazon’s The Grand Tour. I’ll definitely give it a watch.

  121. I don’t mind MMA, I just hate the meathead factor. Thuggishness, no understanding of history, etc. Plus, I hate Joe Rogan.

  122. You H8 Joe Rogan??? I like that he has exposed Carlos Mencia and Amy Schumer as joke stealing C u Next Tuesdays

  123. Meh, let me rephrase that, “I don’t find Joe Rogan funny, nor insightful in any way. I’ve listened to clips from his show and they’re boring.”

  124. I can respect that he stands up against joke thieves, but that’s it.

  125. Ronda Rousey made a mistake stepping back into the ring as a competitor. She could have milked the MMA cow for the next 5 or 6 years while it remains popular and legal. I think scottw summed it up well when he said she inspired 100’s of tough chicks who became better than her.

  126. Honestly, if that’s her legacy then Ronda will be well remembered by MMA. She needs to find some quiet place, open up a dojo, and have a couple of kids.

    Unfortunately I doubt that she’ll make the right choice. Instead she’s likely to end up in Hollywood, date some douchebag, and cause herself more problems.

  127. Paula worked 9-9 today and she’ll be driving home soon.

    Makes me nervous for her to be on the road on amateur night.

  128. She needs to continue in Hollywood, while she still draws. Expendables 3 I think

  129. Better now than in a couple hours, jimbro.

  130. I’ll drink to that!

  131. She’s been in a few movies, done well too.

    I’d love it if she went in with Stallone in Expendables.

  132. True. She chose 9-9 on purpose to avoid the incoming drunks at work and on the road. That way she’ll need to deal with only one drunk at home.

  133. Ah, I get that CoAl. Yeah, avoid all drama.

    I like UFC. I don’t care for boxing, but that’s just personal taste not anything else.

    Joe Rogan is an asshat. Can’t stand him.

  134. I was going to go out tango dancing, but I don’t feel like driving 90 minutes each way, paying $50, and risking all the drunks on the road, not to mention cops. I do wonder if I should go to the store and pick up beer or a bottle of wind to go with the cigar I have.

  135. I’d send you a homebrew if I could, colex.

  136. Whatcha smoking, Alex?

  137. What are you drinking Chief?

    https://is.gd/8nGw25

    https://is.gd/W48lei

  138. Clemson is really talented. Watson is special. 2 picks, and still shutting them out.

    Plus, Dabo Swinney has the best name in football.

  139. A nice fat Oliva Serie V.

  140. Jay, thanks!

  141. Smoking a fat one.

    Just like your mom.

  142. I’m working tonight until eleven or whenever the last sad asshole who hits golf balls on New Year’s Eve is done, whichever one comes first. Then, I’m heading out to lead a meeting at midnight. First time I haven’t spent Amateur Night at home in quite a while.

  143. I like the figurado

    https://is.gd/xUyKj7

    Good choice for a Happy New Year

  144. That’s a great idea, meeting at midnight.

  145. Jimbro,

    It’s the double toro.

  146. Love cigars, but I don’t dare smoke them, after quitting cigs.

    But man they smell good.

  147. ❤️ You Sean bearded guy. We are manufacturing mucus at home. Looks like my cold = Dan’s bronchitis. I’m rocking the Roz voice from Monsters Inc

  148. You’re a good man, Sean.

  149. Few years back, Rosetta asked me what kind of music I listened to. I foolishly linked a video clip od a song from an Indian movie. He mercilessly made fun fo me and the clip.

    Rosetta, if you have WiFi up there, take a look at this:

  150. Missing that gay lesbian today.

  151. It’s about time I light another votive in church for Rosetta. I’ll do that tomorrow.

    We are home this evening and I’m busy watching the second season of Danger Mouse.

  152. Thank you, Oso and bcoch. Between people who can’t drive in the rain, the heedless gunfire, and the drunk drivers out there tonight, I figure I have about a 40% chance of making it there and back alive.

  153. We are already playing Gunfire or Bottle rocket?

  154. http://tinyurl.com/zz24w6n

  155. 35 killed in a bomb blast in Constantinople, now a days known as Istanbul.

    It is about time we kill these bastards by hundreds of millions.

  156. Plus, Dabo Swinney has the best name in football.

    I beg to differ.

    https://is.gd/dX20rh

  157. Shooting, not bomb, Tushar. Unless there’s been another attack that killed the same number of people.

  158. We could use another Urban II about now. I don’t think we get that without some very very bad things happening first, though, like Rome being sacked and St Peter’s being turned into a mosque.

  159. Well, that was painful to watch. Good Luck Clemson, I hope you beat Alabama.

    Mrs. Pupster and I had a shot of Crown Royal a quarter, +1 in the fourth when it was obvious it was going to be a blowout. I think she stopped paying attention to the game in the 3rd.

    I won’t stay up for the turning of the calendar, so let me wish all of H2 a happy and healthy new year, and more peace and prosperity than you deserve.

  160. Leon,

    I’m surprised that we haven’t see a major attack against the Vatican. Unfortunately with this Pope the Church would probably excuse any violence and try to blame us for it.

  161. Thanks, Puppeh. Sorry your team lost. But I hope you have a very happy New Year.

    https://is.gd/Y97CNf

  162. Roll Tide.

    Also, I’m producing more mucus than the rest of you dolts combined.

  163. Alex, I think the reaction will depend on what happens to Francis if that occurs. Either he dies and the Cardinals who chose him learn nothing and find another just like him, they get a clue and pick Cardinal Sarah or Burke, or he survives and decides that ecumenism with Satanic forces is actually a bad idea, and we get the “armed pilgrimage” we so desperately need.

    It’s in God’s hands. I don’t know what He wants, but Islam clearly isn’t His idea.

  164. You’ve got a long way to go, to get the mucus record I’ve set over the last month.

  165. Kleenex just sent me a Thank You note.

  166. Dave Barry – 2016 “What The Hell?”

    http://www.miamiherald.com/living/liv-columns-blogs/dave-barry/article123321019.html

  167. Happy New Year to all my fake internet friends. Thanks for all the entertainment.

  168. WTF? I’m thinking of a mucus station like a weather station. I need the mucus win! America needs the manufacturing win. Let’s get her snots done!!!

  169. I didn’t drive.

  170. I haven’t been producing much mucus. I hate to say this, but flu shots aren’t really a scam.

  171. That’s what the other cult members say.

    …..or club members #oso

  172. Happy New Year, kids.
    Love you all…

  173. 2016 claimed Father Mulcahy on the way out the door, dammit.

  174. Happy New Year, everyone!

  175. We wouldn’t have gone into Iraq if it weren’t for flu shots.

  176. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

    //platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

  177. What’s the significance, Sean? I never heard of that song.

  178. I think it was one of Hillary!’s campaign songs.

  179. OMG, hilarious. Yeah, I can see that nobody would want to hear that on their side right now.

  180. I’m still incredibly skeptical of Trump, but it’s like these dumbasses are saying, “It’s okay, Sean. Look at us. Look at the bullet you dodged.”

  181. People suck.

  182. Happy New Year!

  183. Sorry Car in.

    Happy New Year!

  184. BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA!

    STILL STANDING, BITCHES!

    /moons 2016

  185. Did everyone raucously party?

  186. https://is.gd/RPRAB2

  187. https://is.gd/t1hnfM

  188. Hahahahahaaa
    Yeah, pretty much.

  189. It was so nice of Leon to fill in at CARin’s job.

    https://is.gd/oZDhtm

  190. HI LAURAW!

    Happy New Year!

    What’s growing in the cold frames?

  191. Japanese mustard greens, mostly. Some mache. Some leek seedlings. There’s seeds for some other stuff that will be coming up probably in March.

    Lettuce, claytonia. That sort of thing. Cold weather greens.

    So, mostly greens. The baby turnips in there are not doing much of anything. If they start to bolt instead of grow in March, I’ll pull them and replace them…and…

    *watches Pupster faint of boredom*

    OH!
    Sorry.

    Happy New Year Pupster!! WHO’S A GOOD BOY. WHO’S A GOOD BOY!? YES YOU ARE!

    *gives cookie*

  192. I’m gonna review my wish list at the seed house and push the button. So nice to have something to look forward to.

    Two weeks left of Winter break. Where did it all go??

  193. I made Cyn’s cookies last night, they were awesome.

    https://hostagerecipes.wordpress.com/2015/12/24/easy-3-peanut-butter-cookies/

    I only added a little vanilla. Eggs, sugar, peanut butter. Easy.

  194. Mmmm. Forgot about that recipe. I bet I could mod that for a coconut butter version.

    *adds to project list for next week*

  195. Happy New Year y’all!

    The sweet embrace of sleep prevented me from witnessing any objects drop at midnight. The good news is staying home prevented me from needing adult disposable diapers.

  196. After football today I’m making steaks, brussel sprouts, baked baby potatoes with rosemary and some wilted greens (which sounds fancy but involves oil, garlic, pine nuts and a pan over heat.)

  197. Sauerkraut with ham simmering on the stove, smells like 2017 in here.

  198. Okeedokee. Gotta get ready to go to work.

    Later, taters.

  199. https://is.gd/OlA4Ry

  200. https://is.gd/mXgEWB

  201. https://is.gd/g6AE1S

  202. Let’s begin the year at the animal ERZ

  203. Happy New Year, turdclumps!!!

  204. Happy New Year!

    And thanks for the birthday wishes…

  205. Tushar, that video…ok, that guy is either gayer than Jewstin or has a stone face that rivals Buster Keaton

  206. Let’s begin the year at the animal ERZ

    Wut? IS MOOSE AND SQUIRREL?

  207. Zelda. They just gave her a major pain shot and finally stopped crying. I’ve been dealing with this all week. Twice to the vet during the week and zero improvement.

  208. She’s in the back and I don’t have a book to read . Left it in the car and Pay ran out to do an errand.

  209. Oh, Carin, that’s awful! Poor Zelda. How old is she??

  210. 6

  211. I got shorted on a bill last night. $6. I hate people.

  212. Happy New Year!!!

    A year in which Hillary McMaoSuit will not become president.

    She will, however, remain a cunt.

  213. Car in, did your manager write it off or make you eat it?

  214. Mystery pain in a dog or other animal is what makes veterinary medicine unappealing to me.

  215. Although if your patient is a goldfish you can flush them down the toilet with impunity

  216. Or play basketball with the hamster corpses

  217. https://is.gd/6gA1LA

  218. Moving into the new house this weekend.

    Previous owner is a slight weirdo. And by slight, I mean fully weaponized.

  219. Maybe he’ll leave you a present, MJ.

  220. Making No Peek Chicken. Sounds like it will be good.

  221. MJ, did you patch all the holes in the ceiling where the sex swings were hung?

    Remove all the cameras from the bathrooms?

  222. http://tinyurl.com/z9brc2o

  223. And happy new year!

    Somewhere, HRC is drinking alone and dreaming of drinking

  224. MJ, did you patch all the holes in the ceiling where the sex swings were hung?
    Remove all the cameras from the bathrooms?
    ————————–
    Feature, not a bug.

    Actually its pretty sad. The husband died a year and a half ago at 53.

    She told me all about it while also explaining the 100 stripes she painted in one of the bedrooms.

    I listened patiently but I think we all knew I’m painting over that shit.

  225. “Each stripe is for one of my late kitties…”

  226. My dog did make me eat the ticket, yes.

    We’re home again. The doc thinks it’s arthritis in her spine,then Moose jumped on her and jacked it. I asked if they’d ever seen a dog in so much pain over this and she said yes. It can take a few weeks to heal.

    We have more pain pills and muscle relaxers, but they gave her some shot and she’s high as a kite, and outside. I don’t even know if she recognizes me, to be honest.

  227. Make Zelda Great Again! NOW!

  228. Zelda in… Moosespotting.

  229. Make the Ghetto Bar Great Again.

  230. Make Hillary Great Again.

  231. >>Make Hillary Great Again.

    Unpossible

  232. Let’s start with something easier.

    Make Hillary Sober Again.

    Soberish…

    Less Drunk…

    damn it.

  233. Make Hillary smell less like cabbage again!

  234. HA HA .. Here is a typical picture of the Giants head coach

    http://tinyurl.com/zbpgcyk

    Kid in the crowd

    http://tinyurl.com/jmxzuth

    I hope they hook him up with some free playoff tickets.

  235. Happy New Year!!!

  236. Oso, how many shots fired did you count last night?

  237. Landlord’s son and the paramedics are here. This can’t be good.

  238. Time to have your lease paperwork and your go bag handy

  239. They just loaded a wrapped body into the ambulance.

    Shit.

  240. Giants look good, and they have already beaten the Cowboys twice.

    We could be looking at another Giants vs Patriots Superbowl.

  241. Happy New Year Friends!!

  242. That sucks COAlex…

  243. XB – if you save all the green stuff it might come in handy the first part of April…

  244. Comment by scott on January 1, 2017 6:07 pm

    Giants look good, and they have already beaten the Cowboys twice.
    ======
    Defense is looking great. If they can get past Eli’s patented 3 bonehead throws per game, they will do well.

  245. Sorry about your landlord CoAlEx.

  246. He’s alive. Just malnourished and couldn’t walk. Son found him on the floor and called the ambulance. He’ll probably be out of the hospital in a few days.

  247. NE-NYG would be a great rematch. I think, like the last 2 times, NE could beat them.

    *searches chicken entrails for clues

  248. I like them both, so I wouldn’t be sad if the Patriots won.

    And if the Giants could be the Cowboys for a third time????

    HA HA HA

    That would be better than a Superbowl win.

  249. CoAlex just dodged being suspect uno.

  250. I’d be hilarious if I was investigated for a death I had nothing to do with, and the police found the bodies that I buried.

  251. I’d be hilarious if I was investigated for a death I had nothing to do with, and the police found the bodies that I allegedly buried.

  252. There. Helped you out, CoAl.

  253. >>HA HA .. Here is a typical picture of the Giants head coach

    I looked at that photo for a long time, wondering: “his head doesn’t look that big. What is Scott talking about?”

    I am not very bright.

  254. Serious neotony situation going on there Tushar

  255. ” suspect uno.”

    bad pizza?

  256. Happy New Year.

    *beep*

    God, grant me the serenity…

  257. “…grant me the serenity…”

    Shalom

  258. https://is.gd/9OMKzs

  259. Shalom

    Oy vey.

  260. >>Serious neotony situation going on there Tushar

    Ha ha! I just learned a new word. Thanks, Jimbro.
    Even more hilarious because the Mrs dinged me not 15 minutes ago for acting like a child.

  261. hmm, Neoteny is defined as: the retention of juvenile features in the adult animal. And I was going with that definition, hence my response.
    I thought you were marking my attempt at humor as juvenile.

    Apparently the medical meaning is related, but with differences.

  262. I was just remarking on the kid’s big head in relation to his torso and you wondering what was up and shit.

  263. “marking my attempt at humor as juvenile.”

    psychological neoteny is a hallmark of this chat room.

    so it may be a badge of honor when a man of letters (abcdqrn-hizk-eliphanto-m.. {http://tinyurl.com/jfbod5g}) highlights your achievements

  264. Evening.

  265. Happy New Year, Jewstin.

  266. Last night I was here for New Year’s Eve:. http://tinyurl.com/jj4tur7

  267. Happy New Year Hostages!

  268. Looks like fun. I rang in the New Year here.

    (I was able to leave right afterward.)

  269. Some thousands of people spent hours having a collective seizure while listening to a wall of sound loud enough to turn your insides into your outsides. People insisted it was music, but I’ve heard music. That wasn’t music.

  270. Music is overrated.

  271. *beep*

  272. Heh. It stopped about half an hour ago. But I waited for a lull in customers, slapped a “Back In 10 Minutes” sign up on the window, and walked over to the drugstore across the parking lot to buy some earplugs.

  273. psychological neoteny is a hallmark of this chat room.

    I don’t understand. Is that higher than 4th grade?

  274. while listening to a wall of sound loud enough to turn your insides into your outsides

    My ears have been ringing since I saw an AC/DC concert in the 80s.

  275. Just turn on a Fleetwood Mac album, Shawn. That will drown it out.

  276. A woman meant to call Wiserbud’s record store but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. “Do you have ‘Eyes of Blue’ and ‘A Love Supreme’?” she asked.

    “Well, no,” answered the puzzled homeowner. “But I have a wife and eleven children.”

    “Is that a record?” she inquired.

    “I don’t think so,” replied the man, “but it’s as close as I want to get.”

  277. https://is.gd/SemBTl

  278. ust turn on a Fleetwood Mac album, Shawn. That will drown it out.

    You think you’re pretty clever, don’t you? But you made one mistake, Jay.

    *plans trip to Ames*

  279. https://is.gd/SemBTl

    Photoshopped

  280. Heh, Elliot really likes the Cardinals bottle cozies I got for Christmas. They both have teeth marks, now.

  281. Roamy, knock it off!! Check in, now!!

  282. Dear Facebook,

    I don’t think you’re entirely clear on the concept…

  283. You forgot “or else you get the hose again,” mare.

  284. *doesn’t mention the Loins game

  285. Because I chose to play the derp in a six-piece band,
    First-night nerves every one-night stand.
    I should be glad to be so inclined.
    What a waste! What a waste!
    But I don’t mind.

  286. https://is.gd/GuUsVF

  287. https://is.gd/UCAEWn

  288. http://tinyurl.com/jmu96hx

  289. 20 minutes, give or take.


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