MMM 254: The last week of 2016

… begins today.  Here’s a fun thing that I did a few months ago, back when there was still a chance that Hillary Clinton would complete 0bama’s work to destroy the USA.

Tats.

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Tush.

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Abs.

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More tats, looks like crazy moon-language this time.

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They all have them.  Why!?

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Okay, no tats here.  Or shoes.

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God help me if my daughter is ever in a picture like this.  Eh, at least it’s warm there.

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Happy last week of the year, all.  I’m on vacation and cleaning the house.

195 Comments

  1. This poat is on time and under budget. Until it isn’t.

  2. Insomnia sucks. I’m doing homework. I should also do curls.

    Brah.

  3. My favorite part of the video is when Leon said “OK, this is the irreversible step”. Definitely added some dramatic tension.

    Pyro question: would pre-soaking the reeds with something flammable aid your cause? Perhaps some ace wraps or similarly shaped cloth rolls soaked in napalm and arrayed along the ATBB? That would hopefully prevent the flammable liquid from going in the pond.

    *area to be burned

  4. I am grateful that young women like to post group bikini shots when they’re on vacation.

  5. I’d make a joke about the “girl” second to the left and how “her” bulge is showing… but she looks a hell of a lot like a girl I went to school with.

  6. I could soak the area, but I worry about some of it sinking into the soil.

  7. wakey wakey

  8. No wakey wakey.

    Insomnia insomnia.

  9. I’m not sure about little firebombs, either. When the stalks catch, they burn fast and spread a little. I don’t dare use that thing in the required wind to get good fire spreading. What might really help is raking them into a pile between the first burn* and the second burn.

    *kills the plant but leaves it standing, so I have to machete

  10. Well, Christmas is over That means it’s time to start planning our gardens.

    amiright?

  11. Glad to see Jewstin is alive, now that he’s outed himself as Carin’s SS.

    Carin, the hat is actually from another Santa that felt bad that you hadn’t received anything and asked me where to send a present.

    Confused. The hat is really super awesome and Love it. THANK YOU KIND PERSON. It is really perfect.

    SO CONFUSED AS TO WHOM TO THANK.

    ;)
    Of course, now I have to explain to Pat that the coffee maker isn’t from my ss.

  12. Best Christmas gifts thread?

    Hotspur can spare us his “we just love each other enough, we don’t need gifts”

  13. gave elliot some prime rib fat. mistake.

  14. My daughter got me a Wayne State coffee mug which I really like. I got some running stuff – a reflective vest.

    But I’m really excited for the spinning bike which will arrive this week. Some days my foot hurts too bad to run (plantar f), so I think this will fill in nicely

  15. Elliot was happy, I take it?

  16. well, don’t thank your caps lock key

  17. yeah he was happy. up until he started puking.

  18. I have a feeling one of the nephews fed him more than fat.

  19. Our dogs got to live large yesterday. Paula always makes an extra egg for them which she divides up as a treat. Yesterday they got the half egg, bacon crumbles and then, after dinner, a little salty ham snack. They seemed a little disappointed with just a half egg today.

  20. Everyone is partied out here. Moose is even sleeping in the boy’s room ON THE BED.

    He never does that.

  21. I’m doing bone broth to recover from the holidays. I find it really hard to fast after feasting for a few days . So bone broth until I can get a grip. lol.

  22. Dogs don’t tolerate fat well at all. Part of domestication was the species adapting to live on our castoffs and scraps at a time when we ate all the fat and left the tougher muscles and bones behind. A wolf or fox can eat a big chunk of fat and be fine, but most dogs squirt it from one end or the other.

  23. I’ve still got the roast to do today that was supposed to be yesterday’s dinner, but after dinner tonight it’s broth, tea, and black coffee for a good long while. I’ve put on 9# since Dec 1.

  24. Kevin Williamson calling the Trump sons ” Qusay and Uday ” is an utterly loathsome thing to do. I’m done with that POS.

  25. I gave your mom a salty ham snack.

    Good morning, Hostages.

  26. For Christmas I found $20. Your mom had it stored in a tube sock.

  27. I’ve gained 7 since I’ve been too stuffed up to work out

  28. your mom has no need for a tube sock.

  29. My parents spoiled Possum and her cousin. We had to leave our stroller behind to get all the gifts home, and we’re holding some back for a while until she gets bored with the first batch.

    Diabetic 15yo cat is losing bowel control. Might have had blood in his urine last week. I think it’s time. Without a toddler, I’d try to hang on for a while and see if it’s transient, but I just don’t feel like I can risk that now.

  30. The Boy and I head out to dialysis center today for training on our new normal. At least he is no longer pulling on the apparatus and i actually got five continuous hours of sleep last night.

    Thank you again for the prayers and kind thoughts

  31. Continued prayers, Scienceguy.

  32. Thoughts and prayers, Senor Science. Hang in there.

  33. Bear attacks can be quite vicious, but this man escaped unscathed. Miraculous.

    https://is.gd/yX47DQ

  34. Your mom likes my bone broth

  35. elliot isn’t happy with me. he’s fasting too.

  36. Kevin Williamson can eat a bag of dicks.

  37. I used to give Dorkus mushy white rice when he got like that. Maybe with 1/2 teensy jar of plain chicken baby food, well thinned with water.

    I hadn’t heard about this Williamson dealio. Very disappointing.

  38. >>Kevin Williamson can eat a bag of dicks.

    How do you know he can? Have you seen him eating them?

  39. May be he doesn’t have much of an appetite and is full after just half a bag.

  40. Williamson will be a Glenn Beck guest soon

  41. Williamson and Beck are the real alt-right.

    Which is to say, left.

  42. I’m really sounding pro trump lately. it’s scary. the left makes it hard to not appear pro trump, though.

  43. I thought presidents’ kids were off limits.

  44. Just the Democrats kids, Hotspur. Republican kids are fair game.

  45. Jay, Trump is not the exemplar of personal character, and I can live with that. I am interested in his policies and governing philosophy. He seems to be doing fine so far.

    And about his loose cannon, temperamental, no filter style – that makes him unpredictable. Which is good.

    I was especially amused by his China interaction over Taiwan and drones.
    The Chinese know how Americans politicians behave, and they have the playbook written and ready to counter that.
    Trump has not read the ‘how to conduct yourself diplomatically ‘ manual, and they have no fucking clue how to counter him.

    Mark my words, the challenge for the coming years will not be Putin or ISIS. It will be China. And I can think of no one else who can counter China more effectively that Trump.

  46. 50F and pouring rain now.

  47. Greetings hot snausages. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. Cooking and cleaning the past few days….and it’s all over in 30 minutes. Mr. B. eats all the treats and I get fat.
    About to start the basement project.

  48. I’m really sounding pro trump lately. it’s scary. the left makes it hard to not appear pro trump, though.

    IKR?

  49. car in, your team is in a bowl game, and winning.

  50. maybe you need to work harder, Beasn. *runs

  51. They say that no man can eat an entire bag of dicks, but Kevin Williamson can prove them wrong. He’s like the Cool Hand Luke of dick-eating, only without Luke’s courage, tenacity, wit, or good looks. Basically the only thing he’s good at is eating a bag of dicks.

  52. I’m back up to 235 this morning from 230 on Friday. Not too bad considering the weekend. My goal is 220 by the end of January; 215 would be even better but 220 will keep me on track. I can fit into pants that I haven’t worn in 18 months because they were too tight. Now they’re comfortable.

  53. Soups on.

  54. Shitter’s full.

  55. I was 181 this morning. I should probably be at around 161 to be as lean as I’d like.

    Christmas roast is resting. That will be the last meal for a while.

  56. Made this again:

    http://damndelicious.net/2013/12/25/leftover-hambone-soup/print/

    Used all organic non/GMO ingredients this time to try and respect Boy1’s sensibilities, the organic beans are awful and pretty much ruined the soup. Tough and waxy.

    I’ll keep it simmering for a while to see if they soften up, but that will make the potatoes and carrots too soft.

  57. my goal is 200, has been for 2 years. I like beer and bread and BBQ too much.

  58. Pupster, it must be a bit unnerving to see organic, non gmo fads seep into the family. Looks like boy #1 needs some better things to do. Girls, football, beatings from dad. Anything.

  59. Cocaine and loose women usually work to eliminate any GMO nonsense from their brains.

  60. Yeah…it’s not easy trying to make him happy with ingredients. He gets something in his head and won’t be logical about it, so it’s frustrating when you try and reason with him, or even just make him justify the decision. I don’t think he’s getting good information, but he’s also got that passive/aggressive thing from his mom where he digs in harder when you try and change his mind.

  61. Well, we are back. He has blood clots in and around his catheter coil, so he is doing and over night rest with some heparin infused diasylate and we will start over tomorrow morning.

  62. Egads, you’re getting more than your fair share of pain, Mr. Science. Hope things get better for you real soon.

  63. I’m out of shape. Somehow managed to pull one side of my lower back, just by working at the counter conducting cooking operations.

  64. Your mom’s favorite cut.

    https://is.gd/V3aRmr

  65. Make sure you don’t show him my “genetically modified” dog.

  66. That gets a George Takei, “oh my!”

  67. It’s not like he’s going to make soup out of a dog!

    Who actually would eat a dog?

  68. Yes. Who indeed?

  69. So glad I looked in my mail stack. I had a pay by plate balance due today from going to MA last month. Paid $7.80 on line today to avoid the late charge. I friggin’ hate tolls.

  70. I’d get the EZ-Pass if we had tolls around here but the only tolls in ME are on 95 and if you go to Portland and back it’s a total of two dollar bills for the trip. I’ve got that much in change in my cup holder.

  71. Where’s Cassidy? Sean, did you see that Onstad is gone again?

  72. https://is.gd/Ic3nsH

  73. I love EZ-Pass, monthly statements are so much easier than a shoebox full of toll receipts.

  74. I’d totally get one if I lived in MA still or down in southern ME. When all the cars whiz by the tolls in the EZ-Pass lane and I’m stuck behind some small “m” moron who didn’t remember to have their cash ready for the toll I reconsider it.

  75. I am still amazed the California hasn’t put a toll on the freeways

  76. Mom!!! I shrunk xBrad and set him on the kitchen table.

  77. Made myself an egg in a basket for lunch. Felt like I can improve it

  78. https://is.gd/YT9tgB

  79. Michigan has no toll roads.

    Diabetic cat is at peace.

  80. We went all out this Christmas http://tinyurl.com/gvyktsa

  81. The Mackinaw Bridge is a toll road.

  82. My condolences, Leon.

  83. leon, I’m sorry about your kitty cat. Good ol’ boots.

  84. That’s a toll bridge.

  85. Pupster, that is exactly what I’d do with my kids, not publicly, but at home I would say, “Look, if you’re going to throw a stupid fit, do it right like this…”(then I would proceed to show them), then I would say, “Doesn’t that look stupid?” And of course they would say, “Yes.”

    That ended that.

  86. Hotspur, how did your roast turn out?

  87. the rainbow bridge has a toll.

    sorry bout your kitty leon. diabetes is painful too.

  88. It was divine. Guests loved it. Everyone got to take leftovers home.

  89. I want to throw a half asked tantrum now, just for the how-to

  90. Sorry about your cat, Leon.

  91. Thanks, guys, first time I’ve had to do that. Last time I waited too long and the cat died at home and in pain.

  92. Found it on Amazon, but it is not a heavy outdoor mat. Drat.

    https://is.gd/ZDDnTw

  93. Leon, sorry man. I often think of Fiddler’s Green as the place where cats hang out.

  94. Sorry about your cat, Leon.

  95. Christmas dinner.

  96. Did it taste as good as it looks?

  97. What’s in the little cupcake papers on the plates?

  98. Leon, you did right by your old pal. Good man. Sorry for your loss.

  99. Yeah, that’s never easy.

  100. Dan is setting up the new Apple TV. Old one is getting moved to the bedroom TV. Yay…streaming

  101. http://tinyurl.com/hgu7tkg

  102. Crown roast was awesome. Moist, flavorful, and very festive.

    Laura, the cups had diced pickled beets with a sour cream sauce. Also very festive.

  103. Elegant table setting Hotspur. Complete with Christmas crackers.

    You, sir, are one classy motherfucker

  104. why isn’t there little caps on the bones?

  105. lol

    Here’s a shot with its booties on.

  106. HotBride is the one with class. I’d never heard of a Christmas cracker until we started dating. They’re so much fun.

    Wish I had a photo of all of us with our paper hats on.

  107. Happy Boxing Day, footmen and scullery maids.

  108. *walks in after dusting the beds*

    Ohai, Sean.

  109. Dusting the beds? WTF? How do your beds get dusty?

  110. Mr.Science, there was a rather buxom BBF gal who was photographed dusting the beds…which we all thought was ridiculous.

  111. what’s a Christmas cracker?

  112. One of Rosetta’s whales.

  113. It’s a popper with a toy in it.

  114. People of quality have been known to examine fine antiquities from the comfort of their bed.

    Some of them also do cocaine.

  115. Hotspur is a Christmas cracker.

  116. They’re the round tubes in front of each plate.
    You challenge a table mate by presenting the other end to them. Each person tugs, and it splits into one short end, and one short end with the middle part attached. There’s a loud crack from some gunpowder inside.
    Whoever gets the middle part gets the prizes inside. There is always a paper hat. Usually jokes, riddles, and proverbs. And a prize.

    They are so much fun. Very British.

  117. what’s a Christmas cracker?

    *holds envelope up to Carnac The Magnificent Turban*

    “Every mall Santa except for that one they hired at the Mall of America this year.”

    https://youtu.be/Ji-cT58rgNc

  118. Crackers from Cost Plus. So much fun. We haven’t had crackers in years.

  119. did you like Poe’s touchdown last night, oso?

  120. I liked beating the Broncos twice!!! I still don’t think Andy Reid is “The Answer”

  121. https://is.gd/_where_the_fuck_is_MJ_ ?

  122. Obama said he would have beat Trump.

    Just when I thought he couldn’t get more vapid and irrelevant….

  123. TFG will be hanging on and going on TV to protect his “Legacy” and “Transparency” and the MFM will continue to suck him off on TV.

  124. I’m making a prediction, the democrats will run Cankles again in 2020.

  125. I think I owe MJ from an earlier bet. Where the hell is he?

  126. Cankles won’t be the nominee. I still think that the Dems are going to get destroyed in 2018 and you’ll see new leadership after then.

  127. https://is.gd/_why_Dan_loves_Halloween

  128. After this drubbing, and they can’t get rid of Botox Lips McGrannyDepends?

    I think they’ll ride this horse until it farts dust.

  129. I’m hoping they go with Ellison for DNC. Total FU to the regular D-rats that voted Trump but didn’t change registration

  130. Or in the immortal words of Rosetta, “Keep fucking that chicken.”

  131. HS, we weren’t able to get rid of the Turtle or Boehner after 2014. Drain the Swamp!

  132. Possum likes Slayer?

    https://is.gd/LBUHqb

  133. car in slipped her a cd on that visit

  134. Hillary will stay alive till 2020 out of pure spite and lust for power.
    The Dems won’t be able to say no to her, unless they find a suitable candidate who ranks higher on victimization totem pole than old white women, but is not a black man. Black man had his turn.
    So the options are hispanic, black woman, muslim or disabled.

    Oh God, please let it be Keith Ellison! Trump (or any other Republican, in case Trump is not interested) will beat that muzzie like a red headed stepchild riding on a rented mule.

  135. Oh, gay, lesbian or trans would do as well. They all hold a higher moral ground than old white woman.

  136. the Clinton foundation is still a big fundraising player. they’ll be there, keeping Chelsea alive politically

  137. Go Loins!

  138. Tushar is wise.

    The dems will run the cunt. Third time is the charm.

  139. I’m still leaning towards Tulsi Gabbard. Young, attractive, with a bio that would play well with blue collar whites.

  140. Hillary donors are pissed off.

    Her political future is as bright as Jeb’s.

  141. Groups are cancelling previously scheduled Hill Pickle speeches. Wiki still leaking. Chelsea and hubby are universally H8D

  142. A lot of powerful people want their money back.

    She’ll be laying low.

  143. She couldn’t even manage a Christmas tweet until today. She has some ‘splainin to do

  144. I’m surprised Huma is still around. I figured she’d be kicked to the curb as soon as she was no longer useful.

  145. Oh, gay, lesbian or trans would do as well. They all hold a higher moral ground than old white woman.

    Neil Patrick Harris – RuPaul 2020: “Because Hey, You Guys Like People Who Have TV Shows, Right?”

  146. Doogie Howser FTW!!! My bro interned for his parents law firm his 2nd yr.

  147. G’night. 5AM tomorrow. 3AM Wednesday

  148. Alex, Tulsi Gabbard is the candidate I fear the most. But her being brown skinned won’t be enough. Indians are not much higher on the grievance totem pole than whites and Jews. But still, it would be prudent for GOP to court her and turn her to the dark side.

  149. leon – you did the right thing

  150. Huma is a big investment for forces from the middle east who seek to influence US. They would have taken adequate insurance. She won’t be easy to kick aside. It won’t be easy to Vince Fosterize her as well.

  151. “Comment by scott on December 26, 2016 8:52 pm

    Go Loins!”

    you fuquaaaar – hahhaaaaaa!
    we had guests over last night and we served pork loin and fixings – and as i was carving it up i mumbled “GO LOINS”

    mrs jam gave me the side eye

  152. Tushar,

    She’s dark enough to overcome any hesitation by blacks and latinos, while still being safe for upper-middle class urban whites.

  153. The way the guy says “You idiots” f’n makes that video.

  154. >>She’s dark enough to overcome any hesitation by blacks and latinos, while still being safe for upper-middle class urban whites.

    So basically they will be reprising their excellent strategy of pissing off their erstwhile working class white base.

  155. So basically they will be reprising their excellent strategy of pissing off their erstwhile working class white base.

    I think she’s less likely to piss off the working class whites. She’s opposed TPP and her military service would play well. Pair her with a midwestern Dem with working class roots, and you’d have a very dangerous combo.

  156. Also, I think they’ll be doing most of the work of pissing off working-class whites by yelling at them about how they’re racist and stupid for the next four years.

  157. I really am racist and stupid. I agree with them. I don’t deserve to vote for any of their candidates.

  158. I know, laura. I know. And it just kills me every damn day how badly I let down History by my muleheaded refusal to vote for Obama either time.

  159. I hate myself, Sean. Hate. Hate.

    *pulls lever and votes straight Republican ticket on old fashioned voting machine installed in my house for no meaningful reason*

    I want you to understand, this thing… is just a bedtime ritual. Helps me sleep. Means nothing.

  160. I collect antiques

  161. *votes again*

  162. Right Angle: Whittle, Greene, and Ott on Lib Freak-Outs

    http://tinyurl.com/j5w6fn3

  163. Try to keep this under your hat, but I have a functional time machine. I don’t use it to try to change history in any meaningful way or anything–I mainly just use it to go back and vote against FDR and Kennedy.

  164. HOLY SHIT, REALLY??

    Dude, think big! I don’t think you understand what a goldmine you’re sitting on!

    LOTS of people want to go back in time and vote against FDR and Kennedy!! You could sell tickets!

  165. OK, scampering off to bed now.

    *pulls lever one last time*

    Hillary will never be president. Goodnight.

  166. I think there should be a thread of Bang Your Mom/Time Machine jokes.

  167. Every time I bang your mom it’s like I’m transported back in time to the 70s.

  168. I went back in time and banged your mom.

    Son.

  169. I banged your mom’s mom to make your mom just so I could bang your mom.

  170. the last time i banged your mom the time machine was just a figment of Willard Le Grand Bundy’s imagination

  171. hickory dickery `cock

  172. I went back in time and banged your mom while I banged your mom.

    She asked for seconds. (SWIDT?)

  173. I went back in time and banged your mom and then drew a Hitler mustache on her upper lip while she was sleeping. Had to stop another time traveler from killing her.

  174. I banged your mom so hard that the universe created a time machine in order to rectify the problem of how your grandmother ended up pregnant.

  175. ” then drew a Hitler mustache on her upper lip while she was sleeping. ”

    holy border jumpers!!!! Scene is the original Dirty Sanchez!!!!

  176. My sister is now working as a bartender. She’s calling herself a mixologist.

  177. I went back in time and banged your mom and then went back to five seconds later to get oral, thus becoming the first solo spit-roaster.

  178. Did she grow a fancy mustache, Colex? I think that’s what differentiates a mixologist from an ordinary bartender.

  179. No, no fancy mustache. Plus, from the picture it’s pretty obvious that it’s closer to ghetto bar than modern speakeasy.

  180. aaah right –
    i gotta tap o
    tee

    later days

  181. Your mom gives new meaning to the term “wormhole.”

  182. I got into my DeLorean and drove 88 mph to bang your mom.

    (I didn’t actually go back in time or anything–she’s just a whore for 80s stuff. And cocaine. Which, I guess, is also kind of 80s stuff.)

  183. A time machine powered by banging other people’s mothers sounds like the basis for a crappy anime. Hell, it’s probably already been done.

  184. Destroy everyone’s real paternity.

  185. Back to werk today.

    https://is.gd/tjjXnx

    *inhale*

    *shuddering exhale*

  186. Good morning!

  187. Drain is still clogged.
    Today we switch from bacteria and enzymes to powerful acid.

  188. If that doesn’t work I’m goin’ in.

    *pukes*

  189. if Lauraw would stop trying to cram the skins and innards of critters Scott kills into the disposal, this wouldn’t keep happening.

  190. wakey wakey 2.

    Scott, do you need me to come over?

    *searches for plumbing tools

  191. I’m going to put up a Tuesday post. Give me a few.

  192. Hurry the fuck up. 🐇🐇

    **checks will over one last time


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