Glass Wire

I don’t go to art exhibits very often because I’m straight, but this past weekend, wiserbride and I attended a concert at my son’s college and there happened to be an “art” exhibit in the same building.  We had some time to kill and it was free, so what the hell, let’s go take a look, shall we?

It was …..oh, what’s the word…. oh yeah… HILARIOUS!!!!

Basically, the concept here is gluing glass objects together in different ways and then calling it “art.”  Mostly things like old glass ashtrays and eyeglasses, but there were a couple of other glass items used, as in the piece shown above (wherein the arteest uses old Coke and Pepsi bottles and eyeglass lenses to focus our attention on the deep, dark realization that Coke and Pepsi are nothing more than two sides of one evil Big Soft-Drink Worldwide Conglomerate.  Edgy, non?)

I stupidly did not get pictures of the numerous pieces that were hanging randomly on the walls around the gallery that were nothing more than ashtrays from hotel chains like Howard Johnson and Holiday Inn glued together to make frames for pictures of the hotels from which the ashtrays were stolen.  Mundane and manifestly overt, these pieces were quite obviously from the artist’s early developmental period, when he was working the county fair craft tent and cheesy souvenir circuit.

But there were other pieces that I simply could not ignore.

For example:


I did not get the official name of this piece, but I like to think it’s “Shopping Cart with Inoperable Tumor.”

My friend Megan preferred “BB-8 goes to Wal-Mart.”  Too commercial for my taste.  It’s a good thing Megan is cute.

The next piece is titled:


I’ve renamed it “Nana, Your Package from Amazon is Here.”


I would not be surprised to learn that Scott worked with the artist on that piece.



I, again, did not get the official name of this next piece, but I have dubbed it “Motel 6 Nightstand in Duluth, 2006.”


As we continue to move through the gallery, we begin to see that the artist is becoming more outspoken and courageous in his work, and a certain level of immaturity begins to take hold.

Once again, I do not know the official titles of these next pieces, but I think naming them would strip them of their raw emotional power.



Yes, those are exactly what you think they are.

And, in conclusion, one final piece from Mr. Klein which I think encapsulates not only his bizarre vision and incredible work ethic, but also, in a much broader sense, the entirety of modern art today.

This piece is officially named “Glass House 2016”, however I believe a better title would be “Hey, Look What Grandma Stole From The Waffle House Before She Died.”


Kudos to Mr. Klein for his passable whimsicality and the innovative use of his PayPal account and a hot glue gun.  I sincerely hope that Mr. Klein accepts my critique of his work with that same sense of whimsy.


Happy Thanksgiving, Hostages!


Impotent update/car in:




  1. Good jerb wiser.

    wakey wakey


  2. Ha! Nicely done, Wiser. You are the artist! A shaming artist.

  3. what no glass dildos?

  4. Ha ha! That critique in the last photo is priceless.

  5. Speaking of shaming. Steve Bannon is really smart and the guy who didn’t want to send his daughter to a school with a “bunch of whiny Jews” ( which I whole heartedly agree with) ended up with a daughter that graduated from West Point. She did serve in Afghanistan when it was particularly rough over there.

  6. Art shaming. I like that Mare.

    I added a very important update.

  7. The update is especially directed at Hotspur.

  8. Two thumbs up on the update. At ace’s someone is always saying, “Hillary Clinton will never be President, I just wanted to say that again!”

  9. Ok, I have to go to the grocery store, and I would go RIGHT NOW, but I also have bottles to return.

    That could honestly take forever. I’ve been putting this off. Honestly, if there were some charity I could drop them off – I’d do that. I hate returnable bs.

  10. Cat on my chair, dog on my feet.

  11. I’m mailing in my 23andme kit today so I can find out if I’m human. I did the health survey and told them I eat red meat 6+ times a week and was in very good health.

  12. Carin, I’ve thrown them away before. When I was single and rarely drinking pop I would just chuck the 1 bottle rather than have clutter or spend 5 minutes getting my 10c back.

  13. Wiser, nice job turning an otherwise mundane installation into a riveting political statement of performance art.

    You should call it “Trickle-Down Life in the Age of Trumphitler” and bill the school for your work.

  14. So, I asked the question yesterday and got no response, I shall ask once more and then either take the reins or let it drop.

    Is there anyone who wants to do Secret Santa this year?

  15. Cyn always coordinated the Secret Satan.

  16. I could probably make some time to do it.

  17. Assuming y’all trust me with your real names and addresses.

  18. Not only will Hillary never be president, but she WILL always be a cunt.

  19. That artist is a glasshole.

  20. Man, I wish I lived somewhere where they had way cool art shows.

  21. $15 worth of returnables.

    Yes to SS, I anoint Leon

  22. Okay, I’ll do a post with details on Saturday morning.

  23. Ho Lee Fuk, this one is RIPE!

    I made it to “When I see neo-Nazis raise their hands in terrifying solute…” (yes, that is a typo from a “venerated newsman”)

    Dan Rather Faceplant screed

  24. At our town dump (“transfer station”) you can drop off empties with the proceeds given to the town VFD. We’ve been doing that for years. Before Paula and the kids moved in I returned them about once a month. Too many now.

  25. Also: Home again, home again, jiggity jig

  26. Heh, Anti Trump protest in Tampa(?) marches past a bar that was the first stop on a Marine Corps pub crawl.

    Long, but the news coverage is pretty good. Plus just the situation is just HILARIOUS!

  27. are we still linkerizing videos?

  28. Jewstin! Don’t do it!

  29. Gun-related

    Answers the question about weed.

  30. Trump says he has no interest in going after Hillary.

    Obama sees no need to pardon Hillary.

    Trump changes mind.

  31. Preparing for third trip to town. This is why I don’t get anything done.

  32. Can you drop off some empty bottles for me? Thanks.

  33. There was heavy traffic on 495 even at 0515 when I saw a state cop, lights on, on the left side of the highway. Turns out a small car hit a deer which I learned as I drove over the hindquarters at 65 mph. When I got home the dogs were licking the fresh venison off my mudflaps.

  34. I almost hit a deer last night on the way home. Scared the crap out of me.

  35. I can’t imagine the deer was cool about it, either.

  36. Friend of mine had a gigantic oak tree cut down and the stump ground, so last night I went over there and we filled the bed of my truck with the grindings. Took 3 hours, but I managed to get all of that onto the garden to hold the leaves in place.

  37. Dan, fuck right off. But first eat a bag of dicks.

  38. Also, would it kill my fave talky radio station to talk about something other than the JFK thing? At this point I’m convinced he was killed by a conspiracy of talk radio folks guaranteeing them material for the next half century at least…

  39. >>scott on November 22, 2016 at 1:40 pm
    >>Trump says he has no interest in going after Hillary.
    >>Obama sees no need to pardon Hillary.
    >>Trump changes mind.

    Scottradamus had spoken.

  40. If I’m Trump, once I’m seated at the Resolute Desk, I pressure Comey to resign – shouldn’t be hard to do. Then I let the FBI do its job.

    Loads of new missing and classified emails are found. New evidence of corruption is found.

    “My fellow citizens, in light of these recent discoveries, we must proceed with a new investigation.”

  41. Hillary craps her Depends.

  42. Hillary stays schnockered.

  43. What I’m hoping is that Trump’s people want to separate Hillary from the lackeys who helped her, so that they can clean out the State Department and FBI. I doubt the Clintons feel any loyalty or desire to risk their necks to protect underlings.

  44. Well, if you were going to go after Hillary, the right time to announce that intention really is after 0 is out of office.

  45. Wiser, you are the true artiste :-)

    Would love to have Secret Santa this year – as a participant, though, not as the coordinator. Maybe in future years….

    Got all of the Thanksgiving prep done for the Friendsgiving Feast – we’re so old that we’ve been doing this since before it was a trendy thing; we didn’t even have kids when our crew of folks started doing this!

    Anyway, we’re doing a couple of desserts, a modified Green Bean Casserole, and a GF Cornbread Dressing with Cranberries, Bacon, and Pecans. Also will be bringing a Sweet Potato Casserole, since the guy who usually brought that passed away.

    The daughters proclaimed the Pumpkin Mini Cheesecakes “delish” last night after finagling a sample :-)

  46. Alt-right: Wannabe fake Nazis. Ignore. George Soros: Actual fucking Nazi collaborator…funds most of the D-rat politicians and protest groups. MFM ignores.

  47. But he was just a kid, oso!

  48. Evil has a face. Soros gave lots of $ to local DA races. Raul only got $100,000. He was running unopposed, but blood money is blood money.

  49. Is Friendsgiving really a thing? I’m only seeing it on social media, so not sure if joke or serious.

  50. I’m doing homework and pre-tests every day during holiday week. Did five items today. The next two weeks at school (which are the last two of the semester) are a shitstorm of exams and project due dates.

    The only thing I agreed to prepare for Thanksgiving was sourdough. I’m dropping bread off at three households.

  51. Mmmm…sourdough

  52. Yeah. I made the dough yesterday. Aging it on the cold porch in an immense container. Enough dough to make nine nice boules.

  53. We ordered 5000 pre-cooked pumpkin pies for a casino. Pre-cooked thousands of pies:Apple, caramel apple, fruit sampler, pecan, cherry, and of course pumpkin. Ovens going 24/7 last 3 weeks. We had 2 pallets of pecan and 7 pallets of pumpkin left today. Sold through 2 pallets of Reddi-whip and last pallet of Cool Whip today. Members: What happened to (Fill in the blank)? I was just here last week!

  54. The nice thing about being on a term system is that I just started the winter term, which runs until February. So classes begin this week, which means homework isn’t due until December, and midterms won’t be until after the winter break.

  55. Pretty sweet, Alex.

  56. I’m just going to roast another pumpkin in cubes and skip the pie this year.

  57. Term vs Semester? Discuss.

  58. Comment by Hotspur on November 22, 2016 2:27 pm
    Dan, fuck right off. But first eat a bag of dicks.


    Amen, he’s such an insufferable ass!

    *when I first read Hotspur’s comment I thought he was talking about Oso’s Dan

  59. These pricks that are opposed to racism and violence and want inclusion sure are racist, violent and hatey against 1/2 the country.

  60. Mare, I did too!!! Read upthread. Was like whew! Dan liked all the Hostages he met!

  61. Remember the Hillary hiking story after the election?

    Now this…..

    Why are they trying to rebuild her image now?

    I’m scared.

  62. I thought the bookstore story was a curious thing when I heard it on the radio earlier today.

  63. I’m not. If they got 38 electors to turn there’d be blood in the streets. This is the Clintons trying to play the media because they don’t know for sure what’s going to happen once Trump is sworn in. They’re trying to build a little public good will as protection against any investigation.

  64. For the bag of dick connoisseurs on this blog.

  65. Hillary Clinton looks like shit at that book store. As in not healthy. But I’m with Scott, what’s behind this? Why are they “reporting” this?

  66. Why are the rehabbing her? Maybe this

  67. They need to sell a bag of sugar-free dicks.

  68. I’d hit it.

  69. They need to sell a bag of sugar-free dicks.

    I’d hit it.

    Just make sure to keep your eyes closed

  70. * invents Gummy Fish Sticks *

  71. Not a fan of parkour Tarzan. Live or animated. Yawn

  72. Not a fan of parkour Tarzan. Live or animated. Yawn

    He’s wearing too many clothes for your taste?

  73. Just kind of weak. Totes HHD worthy. Story weak. Ab veins.

  74. 5 days until PUPPY!

  75. Evening Hostages.

    Wiser, ya got issues, brother. Hilarious issues, but issues nonetheless.

  76. He kept his pants on, so you know it didn’t happen in Florida.

  77. Condo is so full of garlic, I’m dying. Chat with you guys after I recover. Killing me!!!

  78. You’re right, Scott. Another point against him.


    Isn’t this good where car ins kid goes to school?

  80. Pants is negative points?

    Sell that.

  81. This happened today across the street from my neighborhood. The deputy killed was the father of a friend of my youngest.

  82. Yes, Scott. 5 days!!!

  83. Squeee!

  84. Puppy feet smell like popcorn.

  85. for a minute I thought scott was getting a puppy too.

  86. All these shootings, all Trump’s fault.

  87. Mmm, Velveeta Mexican and salsa.

  88. Gummy fish sticks are brilliant!!!

    I’m going to make some.

  89. Pupster?

  90. Thanks for stepping up, Leon.

  91. The TV got us reachin’ for stars
    Not the ones between Venus and Mars, the ones that be readin’ for parts
    Some people get breast enhancements and penis enlargers
    Saturday sinners Sunday morning at the feet of the Father
    They need somethin’ to rely on, we get derp on all types of drug
    When all you really need is love

  92. “I don’t go to art exhibits very often because I’m straight, ”

    I love you

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