MMM 231: Independence

So, there were some neat parallels between July 4 1776 and June 23, 2016.  Both times, it was a big group of Englishmen (primarily) who wanted out from under the thumb of a distant, oppressive, unaccountable government.  Both times, the last straw might have been tea. Look, I’m going to warn the rest of you earthlings for the last time: do NOT get between a Briton and his beverage of choice. We burn continents, destroy empires, and generally make a big mess of things over this stuff. Yoo-rope should be thankful that they just walked out this time. You fools ought to be hiding under the table and counting quietly to 100 hoping they won’t come back and torch the place.

Anyhow, I’d like to think that we good folk descended in part from the best and brightest the Iles had to offer the world a few centuries back might have had something to do with it. Showed ’em how, as it were. Now, we should probably talk about orthodontia and rhoticity at some point, but it can wait until after you’ve got a decent Prime Minister, and possibly until after we’ve shed the Muslim Brotherhood plant from our white house. In the meantime, I wish you folks the best of luck making Britain great again, and I hope you’ll take a little bit of joy watching us celebrate what we won for ourselves so long ago, and perhaps feel just a bit more kinship than in years past.

Also, stay tuned for #TEXIT, #AKEXIT, and possibly #QUEBEXIT.

I thought about trying to find patriotic fit girls, but that seemed like work and I’m on vacation. Also I looked and there aren’t a ton of images just waiting to be poached.

So, a dancer first.

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Then some tiny shorts.

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And a little ribbon work.

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Um, can I pass under or do you just want me to wait?

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Quads.

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Pretty smile.

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Rockin’ out.

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Hangin’ around.

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Slightly dull affect, maybe?

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That much eyeshadow is going to run like a river if you sweat at all, darling.

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Meanwhile, at Zumba…

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Happy Independence Day, everyone.  Enjoy freedom until it’s time to win it back again.

127 Comments

  1. Happy Independence Day!

    No real plans for today. Might go look for a new couch, but I hate shopping.

  2. I cannot tell you how surprised I am at the small number of comments this early on a holiday Monday.

  3. https://is.gd/gMWGRU

  4. “Pretty smile”.

    Yes, indeed.

    Happy Fourth of July.

  5. Possum has a terrible relationship with sleep. I’m watching her now so wife can get some rest. Some children her age take like 4 hour naps and sleep for 10 at night. I think she gets a total of 10 hours a day.

  6. She’s almost a year old, right? Growth spurt maybe? A little more solid food in the evening to get her through the night, perhaps?

    (No, I am not playing the question game.)

  7. Dear FoxNews, please stop playing that clip of Rosanne butchering the national anthem. Kthxbye.

  8. She’ll be a year in about 2 weeks. Solids aren’t her favorite yet, but that could just be because she doesn’t like what her mom likes. I should try to cook beef for her more often.

  9. Mine followed this pattern: stop sleeping through the night, ravenous appetite, feet grow a full size, body then grows to match, settle in, sleep through night again.

    There also comes a time around age 2 where they seem to live on love and air, because they couldn’t care less about eating anything. Too much to explore.

  10. She’s never slept through the night well. I had better luck with getting her to nap than my wife generally does, but I relied heavily on the swing, which she’s now too big for. I have pretty good luck getting her to sleep while wearing her. She was nodding off on my lap on the couch this morning, but every time she was just about to be asleep, her startle response would trigger and she’d try to get up and go crawl around.

  11. Do you have a bedtime routine for her? Bath, book, lullaby?

  12. We do. Doesn’t help. She fights sleep like she’s scared of it.

  13. I should clarify. Bedtime routine gets her to sleep. She won’t stay asleep for more than 6 hours, and daytime naps are very short.

  14. Happy 4th of July, everyone.

    Punch a hippy for America!

  15. >>Do you have a bedtime routine for her? Bath, book, lullaby?

    Whisky? Weed? Chloroform?

  16. Morning. Happy Fourth.

  17. I think the guy with the eye shadow is actually a girl.

  18. The Revolution was a favor, madam. Didn’t have to go down like it did. Trying to make us pay for the French and Indian War was your mistake.

  19. The ideal way for America to deal with the rest of the world.

  20. Can’t do that anymore. 0bama cut our dick off just like the trannies we’re all commanded to enthusiastically support now.

  21. Happy 4th, goobers.

  22. Muy bien Cuatro de Julio mi amigos.

  23. Lakey, lakey.

  24. Helping Laura dispose of another body?

  25. Ugh, just saw probably the perfect place appear on craigslist, but I’m in Colorado and can’t go look at it. Will have to hope that I can speak with the landlady over email and work something out.

  26. Independence Day is the best Fricken patriotic holiday on the planet.

    Tushar, I love that, There are 2 types of countries…..

    Also, I bought my daughter a T-shirt that says Political Party and it’s Lincoln, Washington, Franklin and Teddy Roosevelt playing beer pong.

  27. My husband loves that Meathead book I got him for Father’s Day.

    Good tip H2ers and Oso who told me it was at Sam’s Club.

  28. I’m reading The Secret Six. It’s the story of Washington’s spies and it’s a perfect read for the weekend.

  29. The assholes around our place better get their crap together and start putting up some flags. In Texas it was crazy awesome.

  30. You all have a great day and give thanks that you live in the greatest country in the history of civilization.

    Pro tip: Don’t blow off any body parts putting an M-80 in MCPO’s mailbox. (Here’s $50 if you do it)

  31. IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.
    The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,
    When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
    We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.–Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
    He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
    He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
    He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
    He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
    He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
    He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
    He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
    He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
    He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
    He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
    He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
    He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
    He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
    For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
    For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
    For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
    For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
    For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
    For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
    For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
    For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
    For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
    He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
    He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
    He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
    He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
    He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.
    In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.
    Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.
    We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

  32. TL;DR:

    You’re not my read dad!

  33. […] The H2 […]

  34. https://is.gd/BKNUSz

  35. Hotspur celebrating July 4th.

    Circa 1776

  36. Excellent T-shirt, pups. Sent to my girls.

  37. wwakey waky

  38. Day has consisted of an early morning trip to the Home Depot (where NO ONE had what we wanted in his pocket … *shakes fist at sky). Then the “Murph” with Matt. I’ve been puttering doing small tasks, but I work at 3.

  39. Mrs. Pupster is sick, sore throat. Hurt so bad last night she thought she had swallowed a piece of glass.

    Today will be grilling polska kielbasa and hamburgers, badgering Boy2 to get a jerb, laundry, housekeeping, etc.

    Drop the boogie.

  40. I did not realize I could catch a ferry from Milwaukee to Muskegon. It would still take me 11 hours to get to Lapeer from here, but partially by boat would be cool.

  41. I should go to the range. Then clean the house and start packing books.

  42. Only 12.25 hours if I drive around the north side of Lake Michigan.

    Hmmm…

    Is the deck stained? Do you want it to be?

  43. I love going places with the Crazy Cat Lady. When he drives he thinks out loud and it sounds like this:

    Aww man. That light’s red. Come on you butt fuck, turn green. TURN GREEN. Alright. We’re going again. Where are we? Is that a fucking Kia in front of us? What kind of dick drives a fucking Kia? I should crush that asswipe with my Oldsmobile. Where are we going? I think my boy lives somewhere around here. Fuck me. I was going to turn there. . .

  44. Castle Danger is an unincorporated community in Silver Creek Township, Lake County, Minnesota, United States. The community is located between Two Harbors and Beaver Bay on Minnesota Highway 61, on the North Shore of Lake Superior.

    I like the sound of this place. Between Two Harbors and Beaver Bay…CASTLE DANGER.

  45. I did not realize I could catch a ferry from Milwaukee to Muskegon. It would still take me 11 hours to get to Lapeer from here, but partially by boat would be cool.

    Name the date. Once we finish with the deck (and get the hot tub set up) – we’re really gonna be sitting fancy. Once more Jet ski … and it will be idyllic here.

  46. How far are you from the Porcupine mountains? We’re going to be up there the last week of July.

  47. Burger and dog eaten, cigar smoked, beer ahead. Napping now with a dog by my feet. He’s on a leash because he’s tried to herd a few kids.

  48. ‘Bout 6 hours. Nice place?

  49. 8lb pork butt at 165°. Been in the smoker since ten.

  50. I did not realize I could catch a ferry from Milwaukee to Muskegon. It would still take me 11 hours to get to Lapeer from here, but partially by boat would be cool.

    I’d check with Gordon Lightfoot first. See if he thinks the ferry is seaworthy.

  51. Comment by Pupster on July 4, 2016 1:58 pm

    Mrs. Pupster is sick, sore throat. Hurt so bad last night she thought she had swallowed a piece of glass.
    ———-

    They had a story on the news here about people who swallow bristles from the brushes used to clean grills. Evidently, the steel bristles fall out and get caught on the grate, then are picked up by the burger. People swallow the bristles and they get stuck in their throat. Go the the doctor complaining of a sore throat. They don’t even show up well on X-Rays. According to them it happens 3-400 times a year. :)

  52. Dan’s home from work. We’re drinking messican beer, watching baseball, and he’ll be making green chile cheeseburgers later.

  53. I hung up a little bird house in the porch overhang off our sunroom two days ago, and it already has a pair of wrens living in it. Must be democrats.

  54. Thanks Pepe. Thanks a lot.

    *googles*

  55. Well eff-me-a-runnin, I would have never thought of that. She had a sore throat (minor) before this weekend’s grill fest…but it could be. It could be.

  56. Baccardi 151 ought to fix that right up.

  57. https://is.gd/E32aI4

  58. This is really cute, and at a good price.
    Zoom in on the pictures…
    https://tbrci.com/product/a-salt-rifle-lower-receiver/

  59. Or maybe some parasite survived the grill and nested in her throat and now its busy burrowing the larvae into her vocal chords….that could be happening too!

  60. Went to a cookout, came home with a never-fired .22 semi-auto my friend inherited. He suspects it’s never been fired. Price to be discussed later if I decide I like it.

    I will eat fresh wabbit before month’s end.

  61. We must end the cookout loophole

  62. Farage quitting UKIP is about the coolest thing I’ve seen a politician do in my lifetime. I hope he has a long and happy retirement.

  63. It’s true, I pretty much just did what most liberals fear and dread. Semi-auto .22? Practically an M-16. And no NICS check at all.

  64. What’s the make and model, Leon?

  65. Winchester 290.

  66. Holy crap, last year of production was 1976. If it’s really never been fired, it’s a forty year old virgin.

  67. I also fixed a storm door today that we thought we were going to have to replace. Turning out to be a nice 4th.

    Gonna go try making some black raspberry-infused vodka.

  68. Does it have s. l. lr stamped on the barrel? If so you have one of the rare 22 auto loaders that will handle shorts, which are awesome for shooting stuff in the yard.

  69. Great day at the lake. We had it to ourselves for most of the day.

  70. It does indeed. I mentioned I was looking for a short shooter and he said his would do it.

  71. It’s been a weird weekend in terms of fireworks. Last year they were setting them off for 3 days and the dogs whined all night long. This year I think I’ve heard only a few here and there. Our neighbors a few houses down had a big bash last year which probably explains that. If they’re having one this year they may still be deaf from last year. I’m also a little grumpy since I’m the only one who has to wake up at the ass crack of dawn to work in the morning

  72. Nice little rifle

  73. Shorts are expensive, but they sound no louder than a fire cracker, so they don’t attract attention from nervous nelly douche bag neighbors.

  74. Not hearing much in the way of fireworks here either, Jimbob. Maybe as it gets closer to dusk.

  75. Where I am, a quiet pop won’t attract any notice at all. I could probably get away with a .22L, even, though maybe not at 6am.

  76. Just saw this headline on my email

    “Occupy the DNC booking campgrounds around Philly for upcoming convention”

    They still want to Feel the Bern.

  77. Bless their Free Shit Army hearts.

  78. This was actually one of the better groups of models you’ve featured, leon. Tough to spot the tranny. If I had to guess, I’d say quads. Got the d tucked back against the wall.

  79. Boom booms all afternoon. Already started with the illegals. Not even dark here.

  80. 15% humidity. 90+ temps. Swamp is working. Dachshund isn’t agitated yet.

  81. Thanks Shawn, I try.

  82. Leon, Aguila Colibri ammo. It’s .22 Short sized, but has no powder, just the priming compound. Out of a rifle, it’s about as loud as an air gun. Very stealthy.

  83. What kinda fps does it have Pepe? And it probably won’t cycle the action.

  84. No idea, Troy. It will kill squirrels, etc. I always used a bolt action.

  85. Yeah, if it were a lever or bolt that would be awesome.

  86. https://www.midwayusa.com/product/2506163096/aguila-colibri-ammunition-22-long-rifle-20-grain-solid-point

    WARNING: These rounds are powered by the rimfire primer only. They must only be fired in handguns. If fired in rifles, the bullet may remain lodged in the barrel.
    Will not cycle the slide of semi-automatic handguns
    Aguila packages these as Long Rifle ammunition, but they are in fact slightly shorter than a 22 Long cartridge

    Technical Information
    Caliber: 22 Long Rifle
    Bullet Weight: 20 Grains
    Bullet Style: Lead Solid

    Ballistics Information:
    Muzzle Velocity: 500 fps
    Velocity Rating: Subsonic
    Muzzle Energy: 11 ft. lbs.

  87. I could try those in my grandpa’s old 8-shot revolver.

  88. By the way, one of the guys I sponsor is working on the Juno mission that’s going into orbit around Jupiter tonight. He’s been stressed, but hasn’t felt the need to take a drink so far.

  89. Keep up the good work bearded Angel guy.

  90. BTW Oso family drama: Me to Dan: Today is the 40th Anniversary of the Raid on Entebbe. Dan: What’s that? Oso: AYFKM?

  91. Nice post with the Declaration, xbrad. We read that at a family 4th picnic, and it means a lot to hear it out loud. Everyone took a paragraph.

  92. Regular shorts are pretty quiet, about the same as an air rifle.

  93. By the way, one of the guys I sponsor is working on the Juno mission that’s going into orbit around Jupiter tonight. He’s been stressed, but hasn’t felt the need to take a drink so far.

    I worked on Juno, too, but I figure my part’s done. (I had a dirty martini at the end of this long day.)

    Five years, Sean?

  94. At the end of August, roamy. Another AA friend just texted me that he bought a used William S. Burroughs book today and found a plastic bag with over 100 hits of LSD inside. “Some fucken hippie is hating life,” he said.

    America. Fuck yeah.

  95. ‘Murica👊🏻🇺🇸😘

  96. I remembered it was summer but not exactly when, obviously.

    What Osita said. Good work, Sean.

  97. Thank you. I hope everyone has had a few beverages for me tonight.

  98. Hap Birfday Murica!

    Payson – wish you were here :)

  99. Cyn!

  100. Sean, done. Cyn…Payson is the best place to spend the 4th

  101. Scott!

  102. Fireworks, Cyn? Or no splodey zone?

  103. Watching fireworks from the deck soon with perfect weather. Y’all need to be here.

  104. Dammit! Dan wins!

  105. OMG. Work was really freakin busy.

  106. I have to drink (another ) beverage for Sean.

    He would want me to.

  107. Wow, five years!!! *toasts Sean

    Just pretend it’s a diet dr pepper.

  108. No fireworks here. I can hear explosions all around, but nothing to see. I’m packing up books.

  109. Best 4th ever!!! MA is snuggling, not freaking.

  110. Y’all need to be here.

    Well, gee, if you’d said something this morning, I *could* be there.

  111. I don’t think she was being cynsere.

  112. Drive fast, you can make it!

  113. cyncere.

  114. >>cynsere

    Booooo!

  115. The American Heroes Channel has a series called, The Revolutionary War. It’s really good. And of course entirely appropriate for the day. Well, for any day.

    CYN!!!!

  116. Sean, way to kick addiction’s ass!

  117. *gets Sean hooked on Phonics*

  118. Lauraw is truly the funniest person I know

  119. I am powerless over the phonetic value of letters, letter groups, and especially syllables, and my life has become unmanageable.

  120. “Mare’s Musings
    6/20/16
    It’s a sad state of affairs when a person can’t decide if the people running the country are communist scum, socialist scum, fascist scum, full throttle leftist Alinksy scum, getting back at the high school winner which they never were scum, college dorm drunken philosophy scum, power hungry scum, money hungry scum, straight up mentally deficient scum or a pathetic and strange combination of them all.”

    Mare completes me.

  121. Like a fuckin’ fambly reunion up in here. Nice.

  122. Did I miss the skyscrapers, did I miss the long freeway?
    From the derp of California to the shores of Delaware Bay
    You can bet your life I did, till I got back to the U. S. A.


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