April Fool’s Eve



I wish my blue dog would chase a frisbee or ball but she only chases my red dog and visitors who dare to venture near her.

Cooking blog


This is a good revolver (S+W Model 327 TRR8) that’s hard to find and fun to shoot


I’m a little short on ideas and time so I’ll leave you with a few of my favorite things



I like the little octopus-shaped ones the best.


That’s all I got. Be careful out there!



  1. WTFITS?

    Wakey wakey.

  2. Foreal Caucki.

  3. Do you guys serve fried calamari Carin?

  4. This is the worst post in the history of the intertitty.

    Jimbro, go stand in the corner and contemplate all of the she males you could have posted.

  5. From wikipedia:

    “The title is a reference to the often-mistranslated quotation commonly attributed to Hermann Göring — “When I hear the word ‘culture’, that’s when I reach for my revolver” — the actual quote is “Wenn ich Kultur höre … entsichere ich meinen Browning!” This translates as: “Whenever I hear [the word] ‘culture’… I remove the safety from my Browning!” In fact, it is a line uttered by the character Thiemann in Act 1, Scene 1 of the play Schlageter, written by Hanns Johst.”

    Mission of Burma was a Boston band that was more influential as a muse to other bands than commercially successful. They actually played at my college when I was a freshman at some spring outdoor concert. The college brought in a flat bed truck to use as a stage and it was open admission.

  6. http://is.gd/qcv39c

  7. http://is.gd/qcv39c

    Which is better than an itchy crack I suppose


  8. Yes, we do have calamari.

  9. Erin’s old coach just texted me. Yesterday they stood around again. This time in a huddle.

    Wtf is wrong with the school and those coaches? I could run a better practice.

  10. Pictured: Hapless soccer coach


  11. Car in, is the coach new?

  12. The “varsity” coach is new – and has a questionable background. Doesn’t have a coaching license. Doesn’t have a resume of coaching – or training – a winning team. The JV coaches are .. I don’t even know what. The youngest one may be ok, but the older one sets up the practices – which are completely useless. I’ve heard he was one of the biggest stoners in high school.

    Which – makes perfect sense, right?

  13. Must. Do. Fasfa. Now.

  14. At least I have a puppah on my feet.

  15. I need mood music. Gonna start with David Bowie. See if that works.

  16. Mildly nsfw


  17. Filling out this stupid form would be a lot easier if I had the information.

  18. waiting. waiting. waiting.

  19. Stupid Canadians are sending us some crappy weather.

  20. I’m not saying we’re going to get drown’d here with rain, but a dude named Noah just tried to sell me a used boat. Smelled like animal poo though.

  21. 20 degrees here this morning. A wee bit brisk, not much wind though.

    Waiting on a guy who is going to get me lined out on my lathe. The friend who said he could do it just kept putting me off “I’ll be down next month……”. I’m getting the impression that he really doesn’t know how to run one. Wish me luck.

  22. It sounds like the school has other issues if they can’t find an actual soccer coach.

  23. Jimbro, that 8:45 poat made me immedietely feel better about the life choices I’ve made this far.

  24. http://is.gd/fjzgQA

  25. barbed cock of satan.


  26. Soccer is for fags.

  27. Or the French. Yeah, I know, redundant.

  28. Mothafocker.

    Ga. I’m really going to choke a bitch.

  29. Made my final trip of the Kitchen Odyssey to Ikea last night, to return some shit I didn’t need.

    On the way out we followed a muslim woman with seven kids. I said to HotBride, “If that chick has anymore kids, she’s going to need a second vehicle.”

    To which HotBride replied, “If you’re going to take over the world, you have to make a lot of babies.”

    My former very liberal life mate has gotten wise beyond her years.

  30. If you don’t know what AFFH is, do some googling.

    I just heard about it today. Holy crap.

  31. It’s all fake.

    They’re super holy until the contents of their hard drives are revealed.

  32. I read a story about that AFFH thing yesterday. Test case in Hillary’s Chappaqua where they’re trying to muzzle a conservative opponent. I can’t remember exactly where I read it but that might have been the straw that made me think of Mission of Burma.

  33. Our government sucks at just about everything.

  34. Affirmatively Furthering Fair Housing (AFFH)

    Assholes Force Fucking Houses

  35. Try that shit in my little town…..they would never finish construction…let em get the first floor done…..burn it down…..let em finish it to the second level and roof…..burn it down….. let em get it built to inspection ready…. burn it down…..

  36. Troy, just dump some chemicals to make it look like someone was cooking meth. Let them spend tens of thousands on cleanup.

  37. That’s a idea Alex……but I figure if I let em work on it over and over again it’ll probably keep a couple locals working for the same period of time. Milk the project so to speak…. the grand finale could be the haz mat scenario…..

  38. Affirmatively Furthering Fair Housing (AFFH)


    This is the bullshit designed to ruin your nice neighborhood.

    Eff this POS administration and the scum that operate within it.

  39. You’re all a fucking bunch of racists.

  40. We should build all those fair housing projects in the tony ‘burbs of Ann Arbor and other bastions of liberal thought. They can lead the way. SHow us how it’s done.

  41. r

  42. We have more public housing and section 8 horsecrap than you can shake a stick at. We have two fucking homeless shelters FFS.

    It’s time for the rest of you to do your fair share.

  43. I ain’t doing shit Hotspur.

  44. Car in has a bad case of puppyfoot. Incurable.

  45. *bites CoAlex around the ankles

  46. Uh-oh, it’s progressed to stage 3.

    Puppyfoot: The silent struggle.

  47. *pins a ribbon on lapel*

    Hey, do you think we can convince Bono to do a fundraising concert?

  48. I ain’t doing shit Hotspur.

    AFFH says otherwise.

    “We’re the government, and we’re here to help. Hey what’s that nice little piece of property across the pond from you? It’s not being used for anything.”

  49. Apartments next to our Condos are Section 8. Had to be to get permission to build. Albuquerque put in a bus hub by Sam’s Club. Now we have panhandlers on our side of town. Right next to a police substation. Illegal to stand on medians to fundraise. Another stupid law passed with no intent of enforcement.

  50. http://is.gd/sc5utI

  51. It’s going to be a disaster.

    There is enough housing now. Building more will just cause property values to plummet.

    Cities will turn into Detroit, suburbs will turn into cities and there will be a construction boom 20 miles out.

  52. Take a nice town and double it’s budget while destroying property values.

    On purpose.

    He’s not fixing a problem, it’s punishment.

  53. The nice little piece of land across my lake is a wetland and it’s racist to suggest they live there!

  54. let it burn

  55. He’s not fixing a problem, it’s punishment.

    Worse, he’s trying to destroy centers of political resistance by, well, colonizing them with his electoral serfs supporters.

  56. Put the wetbacks in the wetland.

  57. Hotspur’s micro-aggression is making me feel unsafe.

  58. I need emergency counseling.

  59. He’s not fixing a problem, it’s punishment.

    Now you’re catching on.

  60. The stupid busway makes sense now, it was all part of the plan.

    They are going to line that thing with low income housing.

  61. Funny thing is that a good chunk of it runs through West Hartford.

    A very wealthy, liberal town.

    This will be fun to watch.

  62. Let me just add…

    Economic integration is the dumbest thing in the entire fucking catalog of dumb ideas.

    The whole reason people move from shitty neighborhoods is to get out of a shitty neighborhood.

    Importing ‘economically disadvantaged’ groups to nice neighborhoods will just create shitty neighborhoods as the sane people with a few dollars leave for a nice neighborhood.

    Who doesn’t see this? Who is so stupid as to not have thought this through?

  63. My mom lives there. When I told her what was coming she said

    “well, that sounds fair.”


  64. Moving to a nicer neighborhood will be a hate crime, MJ.

  65. there’s a woman that calls into the buck sexton show that talks about afffuhonkyh –
    she’s from california – as usual they’re ahead of the curve:

    affh is just one more destructive train that’s left the station

  66. “Economic integration is the dumbest thing in the entire fucking catalog of dumb ideas. ”

    you’re a hater: it’s for the children and it’ll help fight terrorism…




    (hint: hartford mentioned on the first page)

  67. wordpus won’t let me say:

    let it burn again

  68. so

  69. let

  70. it

  71. the unofficial beer of this chat room?

  72. So … yesterday the geniuses of Lapeer JV soccer decided they would have the girls “juggle”. As the other girls struggled to string together 3-4, Erin whippped out 30.

    “WOW” – idiot coaches.

    Yea, you dumb fucks .

    Then they told the girls to “toe-kick” the ball. Erin had to snap-chat that one out to her friends.

  73. Economic integration is just misery for all.

    Pass the drawn butter, please. This lobster is dry.

  74. http://tinyurl.com/track4xb

  75. I thought I was finally getting a day off to be a bum. Ok, fine…more of a bum. Dan took a personal day and did we watch a movie? Did we go out for breakfast? Au contraire. We went by MiLs to pick up things she decided she needed. Took them to the Woodmark. MiL wants to go home. She’s mad at Dan. Oh well…

  76. oso talking about “washing the dachshund”.

    Yep, uh huh.

  77. It’s all about a cleaner wiener!

  78. http://is.gd/zJevOU

  79. Haha, so true, pups!

  80. http://is.gd/EajUYk

  81. Cookie!!!

  82. Not true, Pups! I’m all about steak and burgers. Dan has to be persueded.

  83. If you request well done steak for your last meal, they give you cereal.

  84. http://is.gd/_For_OsO_nobody_else

  85. Hahaha, Pups. Scott, I’m catching flak for using a knife and fork to eat pizza. I can’t help it if I like my steak sans pink!! LOL

  86. http://is.gd/1dXjvc

  87. I was using the big industrial oven to bake out desiccant today. Numbnuts co-worker saw the oven on and baked his lunch pizza in there then complained about the smell. I bitched at him for taking one of my stainless steel trays and the oven mitts and not bringing them back.

  88. Mmmmmm

  89. Laura has cooked dirt in the oven.

    It makes the whole house smell like dirt.

  90. Dan cooked salmon last night while I was at work. Didn’t throw the evidence. Didn’t air out the Condo. Didn’t rinse his plate.

  91. Cooked salmon inside?

    He’s not right.

  92. It was disgusting. He eats sardines, too

  93. Troy, just dump some chemicals to make it look like someone was cooking meth. Let them spend tens of thousands on cleanup.

    For so long, I have wanted a good reason to learn how to cook meth.

    Found it.

  94. I love sardines. Cooking fish inside is criminal.

  95. In our kitchen remod we got a new exhaust hood/microwave. It vents right out the back because it’s on an outside wall. We’ll see how good it is for keeping out odors.

  96. I cook salmon loaf inside. Like a gangsta.

  97. “He eats sardines, too”

    so i used to work with a woman that brought very fragrant lunches to work…

    she was eastern european and smokin’ hot –

    liked to figure skate, was fluent in 11 ish (i misremember) languages and would help anyone in the office

    her female cow orkers would get all over her shit re: lunch stuff

    the men in the office wouldn’t have cared less if she brought in a wagon of fresh pig shit…

    rip alana

  98. OMG Hawaiian co-worker moved back to Hawai’i. No more stinky break room! 🎉

  99. I used to work with a guy who heated goat in the microwave.

  100. the whole goat?

  101. Just the meat.

  102. I H8 the smell of goat or lamb.

  103. And Fish

  104. Fish cooked the wrong way.

  105. Well 7 more days and I move to Sacramento. It’s getting harder and harder to concentrate on work.

  106. on the plus side the new season of Archer starts tonight

  107. Sacramento?

    Sorry to hear that.

  108. Good luck fake Chad.

  109. Microwave popcorn, burnt.

  110. ^^ The worst

  111. Fake Chad probably drinks Zima.

  112. Zima is no longer. Caput. New Malt beverage are the lame Bud a Rita drinks.

  113. One time in Houston, they cleared the building because someone thought there was a gas leak. Homemade sauerkraut.

  114. ^^ The worst^^



  115. Jimbro,

    Nice poat!

    Obscure Texas factoid: Reverend Horton Heat was the sound board guy at Club Clearview in Deep Ellum (a part of downtown Dallas). Back in the late 80’s-early 90’s if they needed a quick fill in for an opening act he would play. I saw him open for a lot of national acts in the mid-80’s-early 90’s.

    I will raise your ‘Mission of Burma’ and give you another very Athens, GA band: Pylon

  116. I am making pepper relish from my grandfather’s recipe (poated over on the recipe blog). My dad asked for some, and while peppers ain’t cheap this time of year, I bought them anyway so I could make a batch and bring it with me to state Science Olympiad. He made cheese grits for Mini-me and Brunswick stew for me, a little spoiling in return is a good thing.

    Bad weather comin’ in, so I might be finishing this by lamp light.

  117. When I was a kid in Grapevine, TX I was a fan of the db’s.

    They were another Athens band, My favorite song from them is Black & White, but i can’t find a live version.

    Here’s ‘Amplifier’, which is pretty fucking dark.

    The lead singer/guitarist Peter Holsapple went on to work and play with REM.

    The other guitarist, Chris Stamey, had a spotty solo carreer, but this song is insanely catchy:

    I love the line “I didn’t mean it, I take it back’. Yeah, that works in real life.

  118. i rafft in horror when jimes rinked that…
    how the hell do you set your cooch on fire

  119. jheri redding meets sterno

  120. Roamy,
    Looks like you’re in for an “exciting” evening.
    By “exciting” i mean really shitty weather, blown-off roofs and power outages…

  121. Going to London again on Sunday. Just when I get my body clock back to normal, it’s time to leave again.

    I got my membership approved at the Victory Services Club, so we’ll check that out.


    It’s a block away from the layover hotel, The Cumberland.


  122. Still waiting for the wife to come home (she’s at one of those parties where you have to buy crap you don’t need, but you get to drink wine!).

    I present to you the ultimate ’80’s power pop band from Athens, GA:

    Let’s Active. Mitch Easter is a very famous producer now, but he will never live down the eyeliner.

    I’ve always loved the sound of the old Rickenbacker guitars and this song showcases it,

  123. Phat,
    Do you have to go through the “Security Theater” each time you go into Heathrow. or is it random?
    How’s the Texas brother business?

  124. I do not drink zima. Zima is far to manly for the likes of me. Yeah Sacramento, it was time to switch jobs and they had the best offer. I kept trying to get on at Blizzard games so I could get the sword at 5 years but they found me wanting.

  125. Well you stole it ’cause I needed the derp
    And you killed it ’cause I wanted revenge
    Well you lied to me ’cause I asked you to
    Baby, can we still be friends?

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