MMM 209: Year 5 begins…

And this grand institution rolls on.  So very, very much has changed since about now in 2012.  Right about then, I think we all hoped whoever won the hawkeye cock eye was going to knock SCOAMT out of office and at least slow the decline of our once great nation.  Such naive, optimistic fools we were.  The berning times cometh.  Or perhaps the bidening times.  Or the camacho times.  I’m hoping for the last of those.  At least there’ll be handies at Starbux, and I actually know how to grow food, so I’ll be presidentin’ before long.



She might have cut off a little high.  Not complaining, just noting that her pockets are now useless.


Is this effect achieved by a filter, or by colorizing a B&W image?


The only bad thing I can see here is that it’s a crossfit gym.


Cubs fan triptych.


Valentine’s Day is coming up soon.


I miss going to my gym.


This is too washed out, but still pretty.


More of that non-functional camo.


February of 2016 begins.  Oh, and I’M STILL HERE.



  1. the guy in the first oto didn’t tuck very well.

  2. And Firsties!

  3. Handies at Starbux?

    Where do I vote?

  4. I am a Raiders fan, so hooliganism comes naturally

  5. *Sets fire to Broncos jersey. Toasts marshmallow*

  6. Regarding the contents of her too short shorts on girl #2: with an ass like dat she don’t need money

  7. Happy St Brigid’s Day

  8. Several seem like they just recently became eligible for the Olympics.

  9. Jimbro, you are of course correct about #2.

    The Olympics are now a joke by official policy.

  10. two in the box –

    nice job leon

  11. this is from the blaze:


    the chicks with the nose piercing thing goin’ on – we are so screwed.
    they mutilate their bodies and allow their minds to go fallow

    we’re at the event horizon of the tub drain – onward to the sewer

    like leon said – at least i know how to garden (and hunt, fish, repair things, and build)

  12. Geoff’s comment about the “ladies” being new style Wo-lympians…

    So early in the day; so much win.

  13. now Jam can compete in the woman’s 99 meater shartput.


    *buries a t.v. dinner in the yard and waits for the first shoots of Spring*

  15. I didn’t know that Iowa was so full of hipsters.

  16. Worst Olympic Events Evar!!!

  17. The De-Crapathon

  18. The Bi-Athalon

  19. Froboarding

  20. wakey wakey

  21. The Hustle

  22. I can grow you some porks, Chumpo. Salisbury steak doesn’t grow well in your soil.

  23. Relay Meditation

  24. 13 Meater Brownie

  25. Jew, you could be The Neu Harriet Tubman of The Pigs.

  26. The Yerdels

  27. The Log Jump

  28. The Paddywhack

  29. Cussing

  30. Huh. Fluff (one of the downstairs cats) likes to claw me awake in the morning. Apparently I sleep on my left side a lot because my right shoulder is chowdered. Maybe I should tell her the claws aren’t necessary.

  31. MC Hammer Toss

  32. Teanis

  33. 101 Meater Rash

  34. Sigh. Another week.

  35. Electric Fencing

  36. Car In, Tempe. 25 days away.

  37. Former manager was on vacay last week. I am likely to hear something soon assuming project funding happens.

    *looks at form for requesting a desk key so I can comply with “lock desk” policy for a desk that contains a bowl, a fork, and a spoon*
    *continues to procrastinate*

  38. I need to find Carin a new pouty baby avatar for Spring.

  39. Oh wow there’s so many good ones. Some candidates. I like the last one the best so far.


  41. Babies. Babies have problems. And when a baby has a problem, a baby sticks her lower lip out.

  42. 2012?

    Yeah, fuck that year in particular…

  43. This one is plotting something.

  44. Off to school. Seize you later.

  45. Nothing jumping out at me saying, “It’s Spring! Here’s your angry baby.”

    OK now I’m really off to school. Ciao.


    My vote goes here.

  47. That thing Cruz did with the violation notices was utter stupidity. Why is the republican party populated with dim wits?

  48. Lots of good contenders …

  49. New baby expresses my view of Trump.

  50. The other picture had a name on it – photographer. I don’t want to get in trouble.

  51. Snowstorm last night. Post is closed this morning. Too bad they don’t update the website to announce it any more. I’m currently the only one in the office.

  52. Morning all – I see xbradtc’s page is still down. He must have really pissed off wordpress; anti-semitic, homophobic, child-molesting cannibals have gotten their sites restored faster.

    Anything exciting happening in the world?

  53. Sounds like we are getting that storm later tonight, CoAlex. 8-12 inches forecast here.

  54. They’re saying another 6-12 inches here.

  55. Flirting with 60 here.

    Bugs are hatching.

  56. I like the Dave pic in the header.

  57. The grass was still growing in December.

  58. CT is running a big deficit again, but it’s an election year so no new taxes. We’ll borrow, delay making payments……problem solved.

  59. Just issue all tax refunds as bonds.

  60. Insty raised an interesting point. Hillary’s illegal as hell private server not only kept her info away from Congress and FOIA, but it also kept it away from Obama.

  61. I keep waiting for the collapse. When do California, Connecticutt, and Illinois fall apart? It can’t last forever. It’s like waiting for that one fucking Cat hair to land before sweeping the floor.

  62. There won’t be a dramatic collapse. They’ll simply keep getting worse. Crumbling infrastructure, violence, you name it.

  63. It’ll just be a reversion back to the hellhole days of the late 70s.

  64. Just issue all tax refunds as bonds./I>

    No new taxes.

    But we will be the first state in the country to introduce “negative tax cuts.”

  65. for example, “you will not see an increase in your property taxes. Instead, we are giving you a negative tax cut!

    See? It’s a cut! Cuts are good, right?

  66. like leon said – at least i know how to garden (and hunt, fish, repair things, and build)

    Yeah, right up until the commie or the crony capitalist decides they want your property/land for a big tax sucking casino or high rise luxury apartments.

  67. Comrade, Bernie won’t ask for such trivial things.

  68. Luxury dachas are for the inner party members. You’ll live in concrete block apartment complexes.

  69. It’s like waiting for that one fucking Cat hair to land before sweeping the floor.

    Detroit. That’s how it ends.

  70. Luxury dachas are for the inner party members.

    Exactly. And you’ll get nothing.

  71. Snow?

  72. Xb if he wants it he can just ask Vladimir.

  73. It’s fairer that way, beasnsnsnsnsnnnnssss.

  74. But Trump!. He’s going to build a Wall! and do Great! things.
    Have y’all noticed how orange he is? Think he has a liver problem or he thinks he’s sexy and goes commando in a tanning bed?

    We’re f*cked.

  75. You’ll live in concrete block apartment complexes.

    Hey, I work for a concrete form company, I’ll have to rethink this Bernie thing.

    He probably won’t like all the tours of the company by Grassley and Steve King.

  76. dammit beasn, I had chili dogs for supper yesterday. This is no time for that visual.

  77. Fairer my fat arse.

    For years now, our ‘side’ has been bitching and moaning about getting a conservative who will follow the Constitution….and look who they’re supporting. A cagey fothermucker who can’t speak in complete sentences..or thoughts, and never talks of the Constitution.

    “Oh, he’s answered all those questions beasn, just listen to his speeches.”

    “I have and my ears start to bleed after the tenth non-answer and ‘We’re gonna do Great! things'”. And when he went off the rails when CNN tried to pin him down about his partial birth abortion position, he needed smacking in his prissy pursed mouth.

  78. Trump isn’t a conservative, or at least isn’t a conservative on a lot of issues. But I think that he also isn’t beholden to the establishment. A lot of his supporters want to see the GOP leadership crushed.

  79. I’d rather talk about my colonoscopy. Instructions said to go low fat/low fiber for one week. Since I can’t eat dairy, the list of things I can eat has been reduced to a third. No can do, so I looked on the internets and didn’t find any recommendation for a one week diet prep….only a 3 day and the 2 day my husband had to do. I went with 4.
    Anxiety is already beginning to clear the pipes.


  80. Anyone see this exchange between Cruz and an Iowa farmer on renewable fuel standards and subsidies?

    He changed the farmer’s mind.

  81. BEASN 2016!!!

  82. Col. Alex, I think he is very much an establishment guy. He’s played the game and threw money at real PoS.
    Go youtube him praising McConnell and all the earmarks he got for himself and how Kentucky needs to re-elect him. Had he been on record saying McConnell is what is wrong with D.C., I’d have a different opinion.

  83. He changed the farmer’s mind.

    And why they don’t want him to have much air time.

    I’d also have a different opinion of Trump if he used Carson’s answer to the question about his political inexperience…….yeah, I don’t have that experience but I know which direction I want to go and have enough sense to surround myself with those who are. Something to that effect. Trump just deflects and answers nothing because he doesn’t want to give the game away because national security.

  84. But I think that he also isn’t beholden to the establishment. A lot of his supporters want to see the GOP leadership crushed.

    One of my friends says that if Trump is the candidate, vote for him to give the country the middle finger.

    I simply can’t get behind that. I feel it won’t be a middle finger, but something sharper and bigger and going right up our …

  85. The Media wants Trump because they have all sorts of ammo they can use against him once he’s the one. It’s the ONLY way they can win this election.

  86. +1000, Car in.

  87. Four things that really pissed me off about him…

    1. ‘I don’t like abortion, but would not ban PARTIAL birth abortion because choice and I’ve lived in Manhattan all my life’.
    2. KELO
    3. Feds shouldn’t give the states their land back because they can’t be trusted, which adds to the bullshit Kelo.
    4. Him praising the establishment because of all the earmarks they can grab. (youtube – him supporting McConnell for reelection 2014..ignoring the fact the base wanted him gone because he sucks obama ass)

    Without life and property, what is the point, comrades?

  88. Carin, that and he’s really a goes along to get along, you have to be a little establishment to get anything done, kind of guy.

    One of my friends says that if Trump is the candidate, vote for him to give the country the middle finger.

    I just don’t understand this. Why give the country the finger? We’re the ones getting screwed. Vote for someone who gave the establishment the finger and is working to change that pit of vipers.

  89. People are so fucking stupid.

  90. It’s very frustrating. I feel like my new avartard much of the day.

  91. How many times to we have to pretend that candidate X is the “only” won who can win?

    FUCK that.

  92. It’s like hope and change all over again with added angry stupid.
    Question his cult, they go Trump on you.

  93. Candidate X
    Zee’s my xur!

    If zee cant do it
    Unto other non-descript personal pronouns refer!!

  94. No, you shut up.

  95. No, you shut up!

  96. No, you shut up.!

  97. Is Jay back from caucusing for ¡JEB! yet?

  98. Heh.


  99. Comment by Colorado Alex on February 1, 2016 12:35 pm

    There won’t be a dramatic collapse. They’ll simply keep getting worse. Crumbling infrastructure, violence, you name it.


    This, slow decay. That’s how it happens, more crime, roads/sewer/utilities get bad.

  100. Bears and packs of feral dogs roaming the streets. Trannies on sale for ten cents off the dollar.

  101. Victor Davis Hanson writes a lot about the slow decay of rural California

  102. I’m investing in football gear. When the apocalypse comes, I’ll be rich!

  103. Football as in David Beckham or as in Derek Carr?

  104. Damn, just ate leftover green chile cheese fries for lunch. Went from warm to holy moly that’s hot while sitting in the fridge overnight. Sweating like I ran a mile.

  105. Beasn wrote waaay up thread “we’re fucked”…..

    Yep, and we were fucked long before this election even began. Just in case anyone has forgotten, both parties have been openly lying dead to our faces now for at least four years straight. Do you seriously “trust” any of them? Seriously, that’s the first question that must be answered. Do you trust any of them?

  106. I could very happily cast a vote for Fiorina or Carson. Fuck that idea. Trump, Cruz, or Rubio will be plopped on the dinner plate. Like it or lump it.

  107. I am wearing shorts today because I want to. The guy at the store says “Goddamn. You aren’t cold in them skinny-assed legs?”

  108. Cheaper trannies, you say?

    Well, everything has its own upside, however small.

  109. And the buyers backed out of the deal. Damn it.

  110. Ow. Spot clawed the shit out of my elbow because I didn’t pet her properly. Cats are wretched creatures.

  111. Spot, Dot, Mama, Baby, Fluff, and Pearl are the cats. Don’t tell the others, but Fluff is my favorite. She only claws my head in the morning because it’s lap time before work.

  112. The deal, as in your house/condo?

    If so, that sucks. If you’re talking about that weed deal I know nothing about that.

  113. Jimbro,

    I’m selling my house in El Paso. Had a buyer who was willing to pay cash. I would have had the place sold by the end of the week.

  114. And Steve. She’s a sweetie.

  115. She isn’t hiding under the bed today.

  116. If she wasn’t going to use the pockets, she could have cut more off. Just saying…that i like muscular legs…it’s a sickness.

  117. That sucks. I’ve sold exactly one house in my life and benifited from a rising market and sold it for what I paid for it which was 130k if I’m remembering right (1996–give me a break).

  118. benefited

  119. Regular Guy said ‘Don’t touch the pigs! They’re jerks after you make them pets.’. Steve is petted.

  120. I’m such a wimp. Somebody smack me.

  121. Steve plops herself down and gives me super cute eye blubs. It’s fucking disgusting how cute that is. MAAKE IT STOP!

  122. Just saying…that i like muscular legs…it’s a sickness.

    That’s not a sickness.

  123. That’s not a sickness.

    The correct term is “fetish.”

  124. Pshaw, it’s only a fetish if you’re sexually aroused by the shorts without dat ass in them.

  125. Where all da white wimmens at?

  126. I’m a fan of symmetry. I don’t know how this whole “big ass” she gotta be “thick” bullshit started (actually I do) but I’m not “down” wit it. Not knocking those that appreciate that, just not my cup of tea.

  127. I’m no chub chaser, but I do like fellows carrying a few extra pounds. I think people often have a desire for that which seems successful in survivability. The husky ones are good at finding food, and therefore desirable.

  128. I do appreciate symmetry. A completely flat chested chick with big thighs would still look wrong to me.

  129. They call them “speed skaters”.

  130. Likeqwise, I can see why one might find the chick with killer glutes to be a knockout.

  131. I like a tight ass…. it just doesnt have to be yuuuuge…nowadays I see some in the media that are getting play because they have a 55lb ass that barely fits through a freaking doorway ..yeech…ass is wider than their shoulders…..

  132. Sometimes I dribble beer in my chest hair and mop it up with a spare shirt. My observations may be dubiously valuable.

  133. Okay, the speed skater or the ballerina would both catch my eye.

  134. Leon, what does NAC do for you?

  135. When do the caulk-eyes end?

  136. I cooked with habaneros today. My junk is on fire. One day I will learn to wash beforehand. Not today.

  137. I used to be a oleoresin capsicum instructor (pepper spray). I only made the mistake of not washing once, that was all it took. I hate that shit, used to get exposed to it every other week and then every 6 months we had to “requal”.

  138. I have not learned many times. One day.

    *le sigh.

  139. For those of you who like to bust on Southern Californians’ reaction to rain, your mockery is entirely justified. We’ve done nearly twice as much business in the first hour of my shift than we did all fucking day yesterday.

  140. NAC supposedly supports pulmonary function.

  141. And while it’s true Californians can’t drive in the rain, don’t forget, part of that is because the roads really are slicker than shit. When you only get rain twice a year, that’s six months of oil and grease accumulation on the road that comes to the surface.

  142. bout time for caucasianing.

  143. Will there be mudslides this year? How many houses in Piedmont will fall off the hills?

  144. All of them, Jewstin. ALL OF THEM.

  145. The caucasauking is strong in Iowa tonight.

  146. Hah! Seam makes me laugh.

  147. What XB said about slick roads. See also NM this AM with blizzard-like conditions and icy roads. Limited visibility on the way to work. Had to go the long way due to 3 major accidents between here and Sam’s.

  148. Everything had melted by 10.

  149. The point of these posts is lost on me.

  150. The point can be kind of hard to see because it’s usually tucked somewhere between one of the models’ thighs.

  151. They’re a philosophical reflection on the many and varied uses of duct tape.

  152. *wonders what John Edwards is up to tonight

  153. Well, we know he doesn’t have to recreate the stupid first date at Wendy’s anymore. Too soon?

  154. Did the blonde hooker die too? Now I feel kind of bad.

  155. Someone broke

  156. I think their relationship didn’t last his cell time. Remember reading about the kid splitting time with the “Documentary Director” and his daughter. Creepier than ManBearPig. Whatever happened to Tipper?

  157. First world problem, we’re out of celery and I can’t reach my spicy pickle slices or the rest of my queen sized olives in my Bloody.

  158. special guest speaker for cruz! no bush, carson, and a letter from christie.

  159. first speaker is for huckabee, yay.

  160. Are you Cruzing for us?

  161. Someone broke

    Does TinyUrl have an alibi?

  162. Jeb needs to park his ass in a corner and Christie ought to eat another iced cream sandwich. He shuts the fuck up when his mouth is full.

  163. The Canadian equivalent of Punxatawney Phil died.

  164. “Someone broke”

    It was probably xbrad.

  165. Rubio had a rep that was good.

  166. How long do they get to speak.

  167. no trump speaker? wow

  168. Please vote for SMOD, Jay.

    Think of the children.

  169. not aware of a limit, but we’re waiting for steve king, for cruz.

  170. everyone is done, no king, time to vote

  171. that would have been fun to speak for smod, or even explain it.

  172. Speaking for SMOD would be awesome!!

  173. SMOD speaks for itself.

  174. 144 here, looks like more

  175. SMOD. Another fucking Cat hair that won’t fall in good time.

  176. cruz 63
    Rubio 52
    trump 25

    as I thought

  177. There was a time when I was an eternal optimist, but I do find some joy in being bitter and jaded.

  178. they didn’t count changes, so there are 201 here. I have all the counts if you are interested

  179. Si

  180. What?

    I expected more for Santorum. At least 100%.

  181. Huckabee didn’t win? Color me astonished.


  183. so, if trump loses how unbearable are the trumpeteers gonna be? (or maybe he already did the WaPo still shows unreported results)

  184. Other had a good run.

  185. No votes for Kasich, after the NY Slimes endorsement?

  186. Is everyone enjoying the Official Jeb! Big Pile O’ Cash Bonfire outside the caucus?

  187. Kasich got 11, more than Bush, Fiorina, Santorum

    Cruz 63
    Rubio 52
    Trump 25
    Carson 16
    Paul 15
    Kasich 11
    Huckabee 7
    Bush 5
    Fiorina 3
    Santorum 3
    Christie 1
    Gilmore 0

  188. Gilmore over performed. Good for him.

  189. He tied SMOD. Although SMOD had no representation.

  190. Rinsed Penis will be up on Fox, iffin you’re into that.

  191. So, you’re saying there’s still a chance? -Gilmore’d/

  192. I’d rather have Hillary win, but I think Bernie is showing strong

  193. Gilmore is no Jon Huntsman, but he probably doesn’t have a Harley.

  194. Gilmore and Pataki should start their own party. Not a political party. Just a party. Maybe get a pony keg and some pizzas, have George Allen bring a bunch of CDs over. It could be a thing.

  195. Rubio is closing on Trump – if Trump comes in 3rd I expect a Howard Dean moment, which would be epic.

  196. On to NH.

  197. All Cruz needs now are two card tricks to get sainthood.

  198. I’m starting to lean Carson. LOLOLOL

  199. Binge watching The League.

  200. Binge watching The League.

    Which one is you and which is Dan?

  201. We always discuss his FF. I want to be Ambrosia. LOL

  202. Hmm, Cruz/Rubio?

  203. Did anybody ball up their tiny, baby-like fists and cry after anybody else beat them in Iowa today?

  204. don’t forget pudgy

  205. Andrea Tantaros’ analysis of IA is hilarious. “Trump didn’t really need to win IA, he just wanted to”

  206. Hat tip: a Moron on Faceplant.

  207. The question is, can Punchable Face beat Venezuela?

    My tea leaves say maybe.

  208. Andrea Tantaros’ analysis of IA is hilarious. “Trump didn’t really need to win IA, he just wanted to”

    I’d ask what Eric Bolling had to say about it, but his head is probably still so far up Trump’s ass that you wouldn’t be able to understand him anyway.

  209. I had to look up Tracy Flick.

  210. I’d ask what Eric Bolling had to say about it, but his head is probably still so far up Trump’s ass that you wouldn’t be able to understand him anyway.

    I wondering who that was I just always call him the loud stupid guy, which considering bob whathisface used to be on the show is saying something.

  211. Post is closed again tomorrow.

    Bleh, I might still go into work.


  213. Bernie is an angry fucker, isn’t he? All the money is going to the 1%!

  214. Well when you’re sitting there in your derp upholstered chair
    Talkin’ to some rich folk that you know
    Well I hope you won’t see me in my ragged company
    Well, you know I could never be alone

  215. Guess I should have looked at Ace’s before posting that tweet here.

    Solid Gold Dumpster Fire still cracks me up, especially with Solid Gold Dancers dancing around it.

  216. happy ground hog day

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