New Year’s Rockin’ Eve


Hi Hostages! It’s that time of year again! Time to shake out all your tired old resolutions and shine them up to look brand, shiny new. What’s it going to be this year? The always reliable lose weight, polish the bullwhip collection, delurk, organize the gif file, stop cursing, get right with God, earn more money, elect a new president, stop oppressing the downtrodden? If I had a nickel for every New Year’s resolution I never kept I bet I’d be able to buy at least a can of Pringles (Resolution: Stop writing in the first person).



2016: Year of the Monkey !!!

(Disclaimer: Not all animals depicted are monkeys)


( )



  1. Eat bite shit fuck gobble nibble chew
    Nipple bosom hair pie finger fuck screw.

  2. And that’s all Ima say bout that.

  3. I’m going in for an early case and then hopefully leaving. Keeping my fingers crossed no one snags me for anything else.

  4. Holy crap, what a great post. So clicky.

  5. wakey wakey.

    Busy day.

    Work at 3. Fake double tomorrow and Sat. I need to get some paint. Go to the bank.


  6. This morning needs a lot of metal to get me going.

  7. New Years Eve BBall tournament at 9….
    i hope we win a couple

    nice poat jimebro

  8. This is a record. Hannah got new earbuds for christmas. Last night she had mine and said “someone must have taken” hers.


  9. I saw the “Power of Squats” photo before it was on the ONT. It was up at Heartiste earlier in the week.

  10. OMG, I’m worried about me. I’m like a butt hipster.

  11. My truck is getting new sneakers this morning. Scott brought it in for me early this am. He is a nice husband. I did well in the husband department.

    That means I’m using Banglar Party Van to take my little brother out for breakfast today. We might pick up some hobos. You don’t know. No windows back there.

  12. Ha ha ha Leon. Connoisseur of tush.

  13. No crossfit workout on the website. That’s always … dangerous. When they don’t publish what we’re doing.

  14. I wasn’t already subscribed to Abby’s YouTube channel. I’m trying to cut back on those, particularly the ones who offer me nothing but cheesecake workout video. Most of the YT fitness community is young people who can still eat anything and stay fit so long as they exercise regularly. The only people in the genre still considering food quality appear to be the vegans.

    And you know how I feel about vegans.

  15. Year of the Monkey!
    Woooo Hoooo!!

  16. Excellent Poatsy, Jimbro =D

  17. Carry On: You may now resume your workout talk.

  18. >> You don’t know. No windows back there.

    *lower lip trembles*

    I remember

  19. 26.6 °F

  20. 33 °F here. Heh.

  21. Anyone get some this morning?

  22. Not unless you count eating leftover prime rib for breakfast.

  23. 3 degrees right now.

  24. I always click Cyn’s links.

  25. Define “some”

  26. Coffee. Jeez.

    I’m out of coffee.

  27. >>Comment by lauraw on December 31, 2015 8:15 am
    >>Ha ha ha Leon. Connoisseur of tush.

    Pardon me?

  28. >>Year of the Monkey!

    Dave in Texas’s ass is a monkey airport!!!!

  29. Power of Squats girl has a man-bun for a boyfriend. I’m heartbroken.

  30. Workout was horrible. HORRIBLE.

  31. I’m going to yoga.

    It’ll be hard not to stare at the girl crotches today.

  32. yoga? Pussy.

    We did this:

    1 Dead-lift
    2 Hang Power Cleans
    3 Front Squats
    4 Shoulder Press
    5 Back Squats
    6 Push Press
    7 Thrusters
    8 Squat Cleans (from the ground)
    9 Push Jerks
    10 Hang Power Snatches
    11 Overhead Squats
    12 Sumo Dead-lift High Pulls

    *Performed just like the song. 1 Dead-lift,
    2 hang power cleans, 1 dead-lift, etc.

    Took 45 mins. I’m just going to eat and eat the rest of the day.

  33. I don’t know how I’m going to lift trays tonight and tomorrow.

  34. Three eggs toast. Some ham. Now I’m eyeing my split peas soup.

    Maybe i’ll try a coffee. See what that does.

  35. Sounds like prune juice is really what you seek.

  36. *balks

  37. This is for Leon. NO ONE ELSE LOOK.



    I work at 3 today. I’m not recovered from last night,

  39. I’m gonna suture up my future.
    I ain’t jaded. I just hate it.

  40. Five and out.

  41. I’ve been lazy the last two days and haven’t gone to the gym. Perhaps tonight.

  42. Today is one of the days that I really miss ESPN.

  43. My gyms are all closed later today. Crossfit was DEAD this week, but this morning suddenly everyone found Jesus and showed up. I had to use a MENS bar.

    It was horrible.

  44. *lowers volume on football game*

  45. I’m leaving early from work (probably 2pm) and I’ll go then. I’ll work from home this evening.

  46. My vincas are dead. Completely dead.

    So, no garden talk from me until late February when I put in my spring onions and apply pre-emergent to the grass burr patch aka my back yard.

    Unless yall want to hear about how I’ve adjusted my sprinkler system control box for winter watering.

  47. Today’s case aged me I’m sure. It was one of these:

    with no radial pulse that I did last week and it moved in the splint despite 3 k-wires. Took it back today and thankfully asked my partner if he wouldn’t mind stopping by if he was in town. Holy crap! I’ll sum it up by saying it was a 2 person job and needed 4 k-wires. Normally it’s a 1 person/2 wire job.

  48. So you watering with a lower volume or less frequently or both?

  49. Ouch, Jimbro.

  50. When the weather warms up we see a shit ton of them from the monkey bars. They’re tricky but I’ve done so many over the years that it’s one of the cases that usually go well regardless of how bad they are. This one kicked my ass. Good reminder to stay humble.

  51. Houston is killing Florida State, 21-3 with 3:35 to go in the first half.

  52. No radial pulse? How long do you have before the extremity is… well, necrotic?

  53. In this case it was a pink pulseless hand. The brachial artery is tented by the fracture so no pulse but there are collateral vessels around the elbow so the forearm is getting flow. In the majority of cases when you reduce the fracture the pulse comes right back. If it doesn’t but the hand is warm and pink you end up admitting the kid for observation.

    If the pulse is absent and the hand is pale and cold you’re obligated to open up and explore the artery. Thankfully that’s very rare. If needed the vascular surgeon uses a saphenous vein graft to bypass the artery and reestablish flow. I’ve seen that done to a kid once when I was a resident.

  54. Time to necrosis varies but things are going south by 3 to 4 hours of warm ischemia in a kid. When you reestablish flow you need to do fasciotomies to open the muscle compartments which will swell. Again, rare stuff, but possible … gives me nightmares

  55. I’m watching this hotel burning in Dubai and wondering why the networks don’t have Rosie Odonnel on to give expert analysis on the strength of steel in these situations. They’re missing out on a hell of an opportunity to edumacate the rubes.

  56. Yoga (pussy) was awesome. I feel enlightened and shit.

  57. En fuego

  58. I saw Warm Ischemia open for The Fasciotomies at The Garden in ’90.

  59. New Year’s Eve is a bogus “holiday.” Carry on.

  60. Prior to the Iraq War of 2003, the Army taught that tourniquets were a last resort, for fear of losing a limb to due lack of blood flow.

    But the real world quickly showed that exsanguination and shock were much greater threats, and that most casualties would be in a treatment facility within 60 minutes. The rule was flipped. Now, the tourniquet if the first choice to control bleeding. And indeed, given that the patient is likely to come in with higher blood volume and BP, it actually increased not only the likelihood of survival, but also of saving the extremity.

  61. Costly lessons

  62. 60 mins.

  63. Happy New Year, hostages!

    Let’s all hope next year is better than the last. Considering how badly 2015 sucked (ignoring the few bright spots) I cannot imagine how it could be much worse.

  64. 60 mins.


    Wait, what are we talking about?

  65. HNY to you too, wiser!

  66. I was talking about the time between comments.


  67. I CAN’T!! IT’S STUCK!!!

  68. Get your head back in the gutter Cyn!

  69. Speaking of stuck, my tv has been stuck on the SyFy channel since last night–they’re running every episode of The Twilight Zone in order. Squeeee!



  71. OK. THAT’S FINE.


  72. So Jimbro, do you tell your kids “Stay the hell away from the monkey bars!!!” or do you just figure you can fix the damage and they’ll learn a valuable lesson?

  73. They’re past the monkey bar stage now. One of my boys does basketball and the other cross country running. When they’re sore from something we tend to ignore them or tell them to rub some dirt on it.

    Most of the injuries are minor and since they’re kids they do fine. Every once in a while the odds catch up with them though. I’m currently treating a kid in my practice with an open tibia fracture from playing basketball and landing on another kid’s foot. Midshaft tibia fracture poking out the skin. I’ve had kids with wrist and ankle fractures from cross country running. You name it, I’ve seen it. When a kid breaks something in a new and unique fashion I always remark on it and let them know they’re #1!

    It’s a balance between just living life and being too painfully aware of the bad stuff that can happen. I’m in the camp of letting them learn their lesson but giving them hints about consequences just in case they’re listening.


    Your mother used it all last night.

  75. Jimbro’s kids need college tuition paid. He’s out there at night with a can of Pam spraying down the bars.

  76. The year I was born

  77. Hmm, I’ve faced similar accusations before..

  78. It’s almost here

  79. Dan bought herring in a jar at the deli. WTF eats herring?

  80. Dan is a secret Scandi.


  82. I love pickled herring. On rye bread. With a little butter.

    *runs to bedroom crying, slams door*

  83. Quick stop in Phoenix airport on the way home to MN, I waved at you Cyn as I flew over.

    Happy New Year you reprobates, if BBF doesn’t post by 0630 somebody fix it for me thanks.

  84. I’m sorry I’m not sorry. He eats sardines too.

  85. I don’t like rye or pumpernickel. Former scandi co-worker claims that eating chile my whole life has ruined my taste buds.

  86. Happy New Year to all y’all!


    Happy New year!

  88. Oh Boy!
    I got a letter from Mediscare today saying that I’ve met my deductible for 2015, so any further bills this year will be covered!
    Not fuckin’ likely…

  89. I bought my new glasses today. You can see them in Tempe.

  90. Evening.

  91. Hola


  93. The raspberry pi is very cool. oddly enough, the keyboard I bought is the most expensive single item I got for my little computer. I ordered an IBM Model M.

  94. I keep thinking I should use a pi to automate things and then keep talking myself out of it.

  95. It’s a fun little device. i haven’t had a chance to do much with mine yet. I’m going to build a media server with it.

  96. * smiles *

    * nods *

  97. My wife is watching the “Unbranded” documentary that Ace reviewed. It is beautiful cinematography, but I’m trying not to listen too hard.

  98. #RMFTR

  99. what time does Dick Clark fire up?

  100. 45 minutes ago.

  101. 20:40 Zulu time.

  102. C’mon, ‘bama. Let’s ramp it up.

  103. Just heard our first firework/gunshot of the night. 7:25 MST

  104. Anyone else ringing in the New Year with Pigs-in-a-blanket and champagne?

  105. We don’t have gunshots or man-buns.

    They must be related.

  106. Pork chop and Jameson.

  107. It is La Raza that loves the ringing in the New Year with bullets. Mag 7

  108. We had Chinese take out and I had some Jim Beam. Pork ribs and sauerkraut in the slow cooker tomorrow. And mòre football.

  109. So they are related.

  110. Yep. All my local friends are posting about bullets and DUI.

  111. Deep Dish Pizza and Peanut Butter Cookies.

    Life is Good.

  112. Dammit. No cookies here.

  113. Phoenix pizza?

    That’s like Swedish barbecue.

  114. More like Detroit style deep dish from Little Cesar’s.

    The PB cookies I whipped up this afternoon from that three ingredient (flourless) recipe I put on the recipe blog.

  115. Happy New Year, dear ones! Thanks for putting up with me for another year –

  116. This is probably my first boozeless NY since the late seventies. I would say I’m doing it wrong, but it kinda feels right.

  117. Glad you’re still around Teresa. It looked a little touch and go there for a while.

  118. It’s like 1952 hrs here, and there is shit blowing up, gunfire, fireworks, tracers, etc…
    Some of these yokels just can’t wait, or maybe, they’re trying to get it over with and put their kids to bed.
    It’s 27 fuckin’ degrees and falling fast.
    Ain’t nobody got time for this shit.

    Happy fuckin’ New Year, Hostages. We wish you and yours a happy, healthy, and prosperous new year.

  119. In fact, you were gone so long I think probably someone ought to inquire about the number of bullwhips inserted in your nether regions. But I’m not gonna do it. I’m a gentleman.

  120. Happy Soon To Be New Year Cabal!!! RL friend has FB friends in Bangladesh. A few of them friended me on FB to practice their English. PM a few minutes ago: I am much confused with what you are saying. LOLOLOLOL

  121. Happy New Year everybody. Just watching football tonight. I did go into town to pick up supplies today. WalMart had pretty much a third world clientele today, maybe some fourth world, yikes.

    Fuel in the truck started gelling up on the way in, not fun.

  122. Sam’s Club was lacking in the teeth and English by this afternoon.

  123. I’da been yellin’ if my fuel started gellin’.

    *waits for check from Dr. Scholl’s.

  124. Home.


    Happy New Year.


  125. Nappy Yew Hear, errybody.

  126. Did anybody check to make sure they had their pepper spray as anybody else slowly moved ever closer to them as midnight approached today?

  127. Happy New Year, Hosefuckers.

  128. That ‘bama/MSU game was a real nailbiter.

  129. Happy New Year, Cabal members.

  130. 10 mins of 2015 left. it will feel better when that reads Obama instead of 2015.

  131. haha, the guitar in Memphis didn’t drop. it was late.

  132. Happy belated New Year Hostages!!!

  133. Happy new year, all you magnificent fuckwads

    .. I have polished off nearly half of a MacCallan while welcoming the new year, but I still have enough coordination left to wish a happy new year to all the people I love dearly.

  134. It took all my enerygy to write that last commment, but that does not mean that you all are not fuckwads.
    You are. And I still love you all…. but not in a gay way… Although NTTAWWT.

  135. Tush
    MacCallan is one of my favorites, however The Balvenie is just as good and cost slightly, very slightly, less.

  136. Happy new year!

    *fires rifle into the air*

  137. Happy New Year!

    *is wounded by Colex’s bullet*

  138. Loving comes easy (Nothing new)
    But liking it ain’t free. (Underneath the sun)
    We derp our face in public (I can’t derp you)
    While we erase each other privately. (You’re already gone)

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