BBS Fundraiser

Won’t you please help? With your contribution of a squat rack, a pan of cinnamon rolls, a gratis gym membership, or an extra large wet burrito, your gift will allow Lucie Wilde to gain an ass. An ass is a fundamental part of being a porn star, and while Ms Wilde has been given the blessings of a prodigious rack, she’ll never attain the kind of fame that only comes with having both boobs and a substantial backside.

Please don’t allow Ms Wilde to become Ms Milde.


Please consider a monthly gift to help Ms Wilde shake her rump. Sadly, at this moment, Lucie is only able to merely wiggle her bum due to FALOAS (fetal alcohol lack of ass syndrome). Your gift can change all of that. In no time, she’ll be bringing all of the boys to the yard with her milkshake, if only you’d reach deep and deliver the kind of gratitude needed to please Sir Mix A Lot.

Please consider becoming a sustaining member of Lucie Wilde’s ass. Your gift of only $19 per week will give Lucie the training she needs to bob up an down on wieners with the proper ass enhancing form. From a very young age, Ms Wilde has been on her knees, contributing to the lack of ass. With this gift, we’ll give Lucie all of the bum enhancing skills required to finally create an independent, fulfilling, and meaningful ass.


As part of your gift, you’ll receive regular updates from Lucie’s ass, and pictures a few times a year.


Won’t you please help? Tragedies such as Lucie’s ass can be avoided, but only through the contributions you choose to give. Please consider giving now.


  1. Do it for Sally Struthers!

  2. TAKE MY MONEY! Now!

  3. Imagine the pain she’s gone through. Of course lube would help that but ass less people Can be dumb.

  4. I already commented on the poat that disappeared. I’m not doing it again.

  5. Sorry, I didn’t know MJ was poating so I deleted mine.

    What did you say cArIN? TELL ME!

  6. This was my poat:

    Happy Happy Dog Dog!

    I’m feeling purty good today, for no real reason other than my life is awesome and I’m the luckiest man alive.

    I wish you all joy and peace and love ya bunch of rascals!

  7. Excellent poat, MJ.


  9. ^^^hahahah, Pups!!

  10. Butting heads with the boy, which is a rare occurrence. He has plans!!!! Wants to get out and do stuff like feed the cows and clear the road NOW!!!!! So he can leave tomorrow. Me: It’s still snowing, at best you’re gonna get the truck stuck. Just wait until the storm clears this afternoon. Him: Gotta do it NOW!!!!!

    He doesn’t do well sitting around, needs to be out doing something. Today should be fun.

  11. Awards self self award.

  12. Dan finally accepted we aren’t getting out today. He did make biscuits and gravy, and we had leftover ham. Mmm…honeybaked ham.

  13. This fundraiser needs a hashtag. How about #BLM?

    Booty Less Models

  14. We had a Honeybaked Ham for Christmas, my MIL ordered it and it was shipped to us. I am not impressed, I think because it was frozen for shipping, it does not taste very good. Disappointed.

  15. I wakey wakeyed and mentioned everyone to think happy thoughts on cause of me sending me resume to that place I wanted to work at last Spring. They weren’t hiring then but apparently are no.

    Restaurants don’t tend to save resumes/applications. If they weren’t hiring when I put that in they most likely just scrapped it.

  16. I hope obama is enjoying his vacation. It’s half over now. How sad that must be for him.

  17. I’ll send ms. Wilde what’s left of my amoxicillin that I smuggled out of Mexico in my carry on luggage a Fe summers back. She prolly needs anti-biotics more than anything else right now.

  18. Good Luck cArIn, they’d be lucky to have you.

    I was able to sleep in another hour this morning after waking up at my usual time. I think that may be why I’m feeling so happy.

    Mrs. Pupster and I are going to go see Star Wars this afternoon, then we are all going out to dinner as a fambly. The boyz have no interest in the movie so I’ll save that money for cocktails with dinner.

    Tomorrow I’m flying back to Moreno Valley, CA to finish the installation I started before Christmas, I hope to get it banged out in a day or two and be home for New Years Eve.

    I gave Nessie the Wonder Dog her second rawhide bone out of her Christmas stocking this morning. She spent her first night out of her crate in the new house in MN, didn’t tear anything up or wake us up during the night.

    I already made BBF and it is scheduled to poat New Years Day (NO PEEKING!) thanks for the break MJ and Jay.

    I hope you all stay safe and warm and don’t loose your internet so you can entertain me with comments and pictures of cats and stuff.

  19. Re loose the hounds!

  20. I still don’t know my work schedule for this week. you know – this HOLIDAY week. I could work – or not work – the entire weekend.

    Another reason to leave.

    Plus – Keno.

  21. The hostesses asked me to please turn off the Christmas music (I open the restaurant when I bartend) and I told them that as long as I was STILL FUCKING SELLING GIFT CARDS OUT THE WAZOO they’d have to suffer along with me by listening to the music.

    They can suck it.

  22. getting an interview is a crap shoot at restaurants. I mean – what does a resume say about me? It’s luck or non-luck.


  24. They should come see you and sit in your section or at the bar and be difficult customers.

    This soup is too hot.

    *blows on it*

    Your hired.

  25. Is everyone in the Dallas area ok?

  26. Her after ass is just fine. Much better than those giant asses that appear here on Mondays.



  29. Dan got our Honeybaked Ham from the ABQ location. It was yummy. 7 abandoned cars and a streetlight pole down. Between our Condo and the turn to the Club. Roads were turrible. Assholes out in force speeding. Coors is a major arterial. Did not even have one lane cleared, either direction. Snowpacked. Dan decided it wasn’t worth the risk to go to work and drive home in the dark. Back home.


  31. Ugh, 18″ of snow, can’t get through it in a truck. We’ll be trying to get the ancient grader started this afternoon. If we can get it running, we can scrape off all the roads and get around. No snow plows come out here. 1.7 miles is a long way to shovel. Can’t even get a truck out to jump start the grader. Still snowing.

  32. Stay safe Pepe.

  33. The referee in the NY/NE game is “Clete Blakeman”.

  34. getting an interview is a crap shoot at restaurants. I mean – what does a resume say about me? It’s luck or non-luck.

    After applying again, give them a day and then call them for an interview.

  35. Robo calls from MoDot.

    Creeks all over the place are now small rivers. They just shut down Highway 70 (major hway that cuts through MO) in a couple of locations out by me.
    In one place, the fields and an old area of a city usually flood during heavy rains….I don’t ever remember them shutting down the highway in the 25 years we have lived out here.

  36. I’m sitting in McDonald’s watching the cops and emt pax outside at a nasty accident. Traffic is a mess.

  37. Car in, good luck. I have a phone call with the hr gal on 5 Jan to discuss other opportunities in the company.

  38. Very Funny, Muppet.

    Wet Burritos/Chilichangas For Alll!!!


  39. Traffic is clear, time to hit the road.

  40. That’s pretty aggressive, Alex. It triggers me.

    Can you please simply use the road as a tax payer?

    Of course you want to hit the black road, racist.

  41. Dan just needs the right shoes

  42. I want to work out but I sorta lack the motivation.

  43. Panthers lost to the Falcons

  44. I’m feeling purty good today, for no real reason other than my life is awesome and I’m the luckiest man alive.

    Anyone else ever feel like this is just a brave face? It’s okay, Pupster, you can be honest here.

  45. Shhhh Leon. Don’t wreck it.

  46. Anyone else ever feel like this is just a brave face? It’s okay, Pupster, you can be honest here.

    No, really! Today I was feeling fine as frog hair this morning. Then everybody else in the house woke up and pissed in my cheerios.

    Mrs. Pupster didn’t feel like a movie. Boy1 doesn’t want to go out to a restaurant. Boy2 slept in until after noon and was still fucking grouchy when I got him up. Nessie the Wonder Dog barked until the neighbor dogs were in a frenzy.

    Then, I followed the last comment and started commenting on an old thread.

    My good mood is damped but still has some glowing embers. We are going out to eat, stopping by the drug store, then looking at Christmas lights, dammit.

    I’ll go to bed early and get on an airplane tomorrow and start a new week, the last week of 2015.

    Honestly, 2015 can kiss my fuzzy ass.

  47. 2′ of snow in Roswell. My mom has no TV. Dish is full of snow. Doesn’t want to go outside to clear it. My HS home that my sister lives in, was close to the Rowlett/Garland/Sunnyvale/Mesquite tornadoes. My sis has anxiety from the same Wichita Falls tornado that keeps me out of tornado zones. H8 them. Dan is making posole and tamales for dinner. Snow days don’t totally suck.


  49. Maiden voyage of the Pressure Oven. Chicken theighs were cooked to crispy perfection in 25 minutes with very little effort. I may like this thing. I did a simple thing with veggies/olive oil/lemon juice and spices. It’s really going to be a thing for the kids on nights I’m working.

  50. Scott, last blizzard, Dan and I walked to our respective workplaces. AM is okay. PM has too many aggressive drivers that put pedestrian lives at risk. No longer about snow and ice. Everything about iceholes.

  51. Stirring the posole. Not a euphemism.

  52. My mom is such a commie. She’s upset with my cousin who evicted her non-paying tenant before Christmas and then sued him in court. My mom and her BF have $$$. They signed up for and get Meals on Wheels. My mom was bitching that because of the snow, they may not get MoWs again tomorrow. Fried Chicken. Woe is she.

  53. Dan’s BFF gave him his DirectTV password. Dan was able to watch his Steelers. 😂😂😂

  54. Coming soon to theaters:

    Commie Mommie 2: Red Diaper Baby

  55. Owning the comments. I knew that Pepe was West of the Bosque, but I didn’t “Know” know. He really lives in a beautiful part of East AZ.

  56. Salina, KS. Weather has been clear so far. Globe was nice.

  57. Leon, my mom is crazy. She’s the reason I H8 Halloween. Made me a devout capitalist at the age of 6

  58. CoAl, where you headed. Weather is cray cray east of the Llano

  59. Oso,

    Stirring the posole should be a euphemism. Remember to use lots of wrist motion.

    I’m heading to San Antonio TX to see a buddy get married.

  60. Safe travels. Lots of assholes out there and closed roads. I agree. Stirring the posole is funny.

  61. Ok, fine, I’ll reply here.

  62. Dan’s BFF gave him his DirectTV password. Dan was able to watch his Steelers. 😂😂😂

    Did you watch with him? And laugh at his misfortune?

  63. Wow, the Cards are steamrolling the Packers.

  64. I was napping. I woke up to. Chaos. Dan had moved KC bear from the left to the right in the BMC. Dan was watching Steelers on iPad mini. Cheatriots on big screen. Total Drama.

  65. Roads are freezing up and closing. We’re watching GB/Cards. Not liking the Nazi’s that run Doxie rescue in NM. Really need a new dog.

  66. Doxie rescue? Are they out helping doxies to pee in the snow?

  67. We slept almost not at all at my parents’ house last night. Possum kept waking up and being startled that she wasn’t at home. Benny kept waking up and wanting to go outside. I think I slept 4 hours.

    I’d be asleep now but I’m wired on caffeine from trying to stay alert on the drive home.

  68. Urgh. Fighting the snow all afternoon. Got the cattle some feed. Got the grader started, the boy backed it up, started to shift into first…….and the gear shift snapped in two. Dead in the water. I’ll have to try and fix it tomorrow. Hopefully we can get going, even if we can only go forward. Just too much snow for the trucks to push through.

  69. Not a single flake here. But it’s cold. Ish. Like 37.

  70. Strange weather compared to last year.
    We were in a drought and the NE was eyeball deep in snow.
    Some of our ski-areas never opened.
    The others closed in a week.

    This year, the NE is having Spring in December.
    Here, in the lowlands, we had 10″ of rain last week.
    The passes and ski-areas got 12 feet of snow…

  71. Pepe, good luck. J’ames, Doxie rescue in NM is like dealing with Foster Care. They want to dissect every aspect of your life before allowing you to rescue for the same price as a puppy mill dachshund. Dan is really missing Ginger. Even senior rescue in NM is fucked up by prog assholes. WGAF if we have guns? Looking like Puppy Mill Stitch baby.

  72. We hit 60 degrees today.

  73. Grrr, Cards killing the Packers so… all of a sudden the even-up calls start. Freaking hate the refs this year.

  74. Scott, when it hits, it will be ugly. Breastaurants closed on a football Sunday. Shit just got real. DOT is already closing roads tonight.

  75. So we FINALLY got all the wayward commenters. Shesh. It’s like they’ve never seen boobs. Can’t stand to leave the poat.

  76. Carpet advice. Anyone. Buying/choosing/installing.


  77. Dan’s boss was watching FB in the breakroom. Said it got crazy busy between 2 and 3. Most associates called out. She told Dan he could come in with me at 5 tomorrow. Hope the roads are safe.

  78. Scott, HS, and Lauraw…go!

  79. Carpet advice. Anyone. Buying/choosing/installing.


    I hear it makes you look cheap if it doesn’t match the drapes.

  80. AND…Sean wins.

  81. I want laminate flooring with area rugs.

  82. I second Oso’s rec. I hate carpet. We only have it because it came with the house.

  83. FYI DoT cinder mix was crap. Didn’t help us at all. FYI FU 16 workers that were working today. Half the speed limit? Really. Tell that to the crypt keeper going 5 MPH. Tell that to the Lesbaru going 40. Dan was right. I will never say that again.

  84. I have less ass than that. THX to Leon and Car in, I know that hard work is involved in getting an ass. My flat ass will see y’all in Tempe.

  85. Dan: Now that the Steelers are out, who are you for? (He is such an ass)

  86. Flooring, no carpet.

  87. I have less ass than that.

    Dan, if you’re reading this, I’m sorry.

  88. I forget, doesn’t Carin already have wood floors?

  89. He’s a boob guy. Didn’t realize I had no ass until later.

  90. Just get dirt floors. You’ll never have to worry about vacuuming.

  91. Evening.

  92. I’m trying to create dirt floors. Elliot hasn’t been eating all the dirt off the floor. He’s slacking.

  93. Just get dirt floors. You’ll never have to worry about vacuuming.
    Hard to mop.

  94. Dirt floors will go with the backwards home schooling feel, too.

  95. Why didn’t anyone say hi to Jewstin?

    Hi Jewstin The Hammer!

  96. Public schooling is child abuse anymore.

  97. Pulled off the HWY and got a hotel room north of Wichita. Was seeing reports that OKC was getting hit hard by the storm and I35 was closed in places. I figured it would be better to leave early tomorrow rather than risk getting stuck closer to TX.

    I’ve got 625 miles to cover tomorrow before 6pm. I’m going to leave at 6am, and try to average 85-90 MPH.

  98. Only thing worse than public schools is foster care. Heartbreaking. Time to change the goal of family integration and cut the cord.

  99. Safe travels Alex.

  100. Oso, it’ll never happen. Too much racism and corruption. White couples adopt, lots of kids in foster care are black/brown. Would cause an outcry and people would scream “genocide!”. Also, if kids are adopted then there is no kickback scheme between the social worker and her family.

  101. Saw a conversation on Facedouche by some lib complaining about all the white couples in his OK hometown who had adopted asian babies. He suggested it was some sort of status symbol. I was good and didn’t call him a dipshit and a fucking idiot.

  102. A couple at my church have two adopted Filipino boys. One has autism and the other has ADHD. They would have been dumped on the street at 16 back home.

    Corporal works of mercy are totally status symbols the world could use more of.

  103. Isn’t there a much straighter line to San Antonio?

  104. I thought Minnesota played in a dome.

  105. They did. And then…

  106. They’re playing here until the new indoor stadium is finished.


  108. Scott,

    I was trying to avoid northern NM and the Texas/Oklahoma panhandle due to the weather. My plan may have had a few flaws.

  109. I get it.

  110. CoAlex,
    For Gods sake, take a real good look at the RADAR before you head out in the morning.
    One does not simply “drive” into Mordor…

  111. This game is over, the Canadians have won.

  112. A few years back, Scott drove and made deliveries for forty hours straight, in order to keep ahead of a midwest ice storm. He was making a number of special freight deliveries from Vail to Chicago, and eventually back to Connecticut.

    His main fear was getting stranded before he could honor his commitments (thus losing all the money for the trip), but his REAL main fear was not staying ahead of the big rigs that nearly knocked him off the ever-slickening roads everywhere he went.

    After that it only took a couple similar jobs before he decided that over-the-road work through the midwest was neither profitable nor healthy in Winter.

    After you start hallucinating penguins standing in the road, it’s time to review your work practices.

  113. Check your email. TITS2 info just landed.

  114. *reviews work practices*

    Nope, those seem to be okay.

    *reviews peyote practices*

    Okay, that might have something to do with these penguins.


  116. White-knuckle driving, Sean. He was so terribly afraid of hitting one of those penguins. He’s a kind man.

    I’ve hallucinated on long drives after little sleep, too. Little black shapes like bats, flying up out of the pavement as I approached. Also saw bridges or overpasses that disappeared as I drove under them. Not fun.

  117. I was intrigued up until you said, “Not fun.” :(

  118. Did anybody order anybody else not to stop because they were driving through “bat country” today?

  119. Lauraw,
    Once upon a time, long long ago, I was in the OR Army National Guard, after active duty.
    I had been hired by a company in WA, and so lived and worked there.
    I would get off swings at 12:30 on Friday night and have to show up for a drill in Portland at 0800 on Saturday.
    Get off work and drive south on I5.
    Anita would hit me and scream that;
    “You’re Sleeping!”
    It took me a while to learn to sleep with my eyes open, so she wouldn’t yell.
    After that, it was golden.
    I would wake-up with no memory of the last 50 miles.
    Dangerous as shit. I was young and stupid…

  120. Raining..raining…raining. Again. A smidge short of 9 inches since Christmas. 2 to 4 more before it stops sometime tomorrow.

    Major interstate closed until tomorrow. Maybe.

  121. A smidge short of 9 inches…

    It’s because of the cold weather!

  122. *reopens Xbrad’s 2015 funny folder, adds +1*

  123. Cynnabuns, thanks for all the hard work you’ve put into Secret Santa and TITS2. I know you’re busy.


  124. You’re welcome – getting easy to do, and looking forward to seeing you and almost (sad face for non-attendings) everybody again in two months!

  125. Monday Workday Blech

  126. All you peeps in shitty weather – Stay Safe & Shelter In Place!!

  127. We’re getting our snowstorm tomorrow through Tuesday.

  128. Boooo

  129. It’s 50° here. Jacket and long-sleeved shirt weather.

  130. I’m pretty sure the husband will be working from home tomorrow. Both usual routes into the office are closed.

  131. Wow, forgot how much I enjoyed Interstellar.

  132. How did this movie not win Best Musical Score. The organ music is pure genius.

  133. Hard to understand
    What a hell of a man
    This derp of the slum
    Had a mind, wasn’t dumb
    But a weakness was shown
    ‘Cause his hustle was wrong
    His mind was his own
    But the man lived alone

  134. Dorkus got me up to puke (caught it in a rag, so no carpet cleaning this time! YASSS!). Went back to bed, then he got up and started pacing.

    So we did his whole outdoors-indoors X2 routine. He fell down the steps the first time, and I saw a coyote in the neighbor’s yard the second time.

    I love stalking around my yard with a garden hoe at 5:50 am.

    Not going back to bed. Fuckit, I’m up. Coffee is brewed.

    Life is pretty nice and I’m going to watch the sunrise. How did you start your day today?

  135. Gonna listen to talk radio because it’s been a long time since I heard weather forecasters freak out. Our weather has been uneventful for quite a long time. This will be fun! I absolutely love the first snows. Hope it isn’t an ice storm.

  136. I woke up to an angry nurse wondering why she had signed up for so many shifts during school vacation week. (I took an extra day off today to burn my vacation days up before the new year). She’s now on per diem status and can make her own schedule but didn’t look closely when she signed up. C-R-A-B-B-Y!!!

  137. How did you start your day today?

    Burying the hooker in a shallow grave.

  138. C-R-A-B-B-Y!!!

    Being mad at yourself sucks.

  139. NECN began their broadcast with a segment on the approaching storm with MASSDOT salt piles and brine tanks in the background of all the interviews.

  140. Meadowlark Lemon died.

  141. Hey there, I woke up and remembered it was Monday. Gimme about 17 minutes.

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