Big Boob Friday

Hello, buttholes. I really don’t have much in the way of rhetoric, so I’ll just defer to action. Big boob bouncing, sweater stretching, jaw dropping, tittehs. I can’t remember this hos name, but it’s foreign, so we should make like a lefty and demand that she be let in right fucking now.

Please stop denying healthcare to children and grandmothers long enough to welcome Anastasia Martzipanova!!!!!!!!!one!!!!!!!!one!!!!!!!!!













  1. She seems nice.

  2. Could repeat my comment from the old poat, but I won’t. Love the gifs, MJ.

    Y’all have a good day.

  3. Kurt Schlichter is an honorary Hostage, IMO

    *clasps hands under chin in pure joy*

    Does he have a garden, TOO???

  4. Last pic is a tranny boy’s butt.

  5. This isn’t according to tradition. She needs a sammich. One of the girls at work is a model (she isn’t big enough to do it year round so she goes back and forth to NY – coming home during the “off”period).

    She is sooo skinny I could probably break her like a twig.

    wakey wakey

  6. You know what demographic has great thigh gaps?

    Most dudes.

    Dumbest body fad for women, ever.

  7. *subscribes to Lauraw’s newsletter

  8. It’s like a mash up of Leon’s veiny Monday things and a Friday Holstein. Interesting if not titilating.

  9. Her arms and shoulders look within the realm of normalcy from the front but that black and white from the side screams Dachau.

  10. A tasty treat.

  11. Local news report this morning “One of the shooters may have had terrorist ties, no motive is certain at this point….” SMH

  12. Happy Birthday CarIn.

  13. Thanks!!

  14. Happy Birthday Carin!

  15. Thanks Oso.

  16. Happy Birthday Carin! If you keep sticking your lip out like that, a pigeon’s gonna poop on it.

  17. Happy birthday, Car in! Have fun!

  18. Happy birthday, Carin. I hope you don’t have to work tonight, and get to go out and be waited on hand and foot.

  19. Meanwhile, at Jay’s gym.

  20. Better footage of Jay’s gym

  21. Unfortunately I do work tonight. And a double tomorrow. And the next day. And then Monday night.


  22. Well at least your Loins didn’t disappoint last night.


  23. I was going to get CarIn the new Tool album but……….

  24. She seems nice if underfed and underhaunched. Happy birthday Carin.

  25. J’ames – I love the burpee challenge thing. I wonder if they’d do something like that at my gym? W/o the weird drink. Everyone puts in a few bucks.

  26. That’s a lot of burpees. I do the cheater ones without the pushup.

  27. Erin is really pissed about the Lions game. Horrible.

  28. Burpees – pushups = squat-thrusts.

  29. Crossfit just requires you put your chest to the ground.

  30. Plus the jump of course.

  31. Sounds like a pushup to me

  32. Eh. It’s a bit easier than having to do an “official” pushup. You can kind of flop down. lol. They still suck.

  33. Lions should’ve won. No way that was a face-mask. I’m beyond sick of the NFL refs determining the outcomes of games. I’ve read Peter Gent. i know it has been part of the NFL since the beginning. Just seems more flagrant this year. SWIDT? (Leather helmet off)

  34. Happy Birthday Carin!!!

    May you forever squat like a boss!

  35. Refs have made horrible calls this year. The only reason GB got back into the game was a ton of penalties on Detroit. Their offensive strategy in the second half was “throw it deep and we’ll get a call”

    NBA refs are horrible about evening up games, seems like NFL refs are doing that more and more too.

  36. NBA refs don’t even hide it!!! That is why you have to score beyond the refs ability to take the game away from you.

  37. Erin is not speaking to her day at the moment. She threw the remote turned off the tv and said she wasn’t going to school the next day (today).

    She did go. But she wasn’t happy. I heard a very detailed bit of the end of the game – I went to bed early.

    I can’t stand to be between those two when the Lions play the packers.

  38. Nice job MJ! It’s almost like you put some effort into it! Except the sideways hair one. *peers over glasses and scribbles something in notebook*

  39. Make her do burpees until she’s too tired to be angry.

  40. I’m pretty sure “Don’t Tell the Stripper She’s Fat” was a Bloodhound Gang album.

  41. Cyn, good to see you this morning. And here’s why……..I was cleaning all the facecock twitchnutz Amazon hp Expedia southwest airlines inflatable toys etc junk out of my inbox and accidently hit the trash can Icon one too many times. And deleted the secret Santa email. Could you be a doll and resend it so my victim doesn’t have to be dissapointed on opening day like BCock was last year? thanks in advance.

  42. Who is Erin not talking to?

  43. This is the bullcrap that passes for higher education in my fair city. Kids are actually paying for this.

  44. I upgraded something on my 10 year old Mac and now I can’t restore with time machine because I wasn’t backing it up. Ufff. I think I need a new computer. I’m on an iPad so if I don’t say lots of stupid things like I usually do it’s because I’m reading you turds on my phone.

    I don’t know what I’m saying.

  45. Her father. The Packer fan.

  46. Hotspur, that is indeed bullshit. And WTF does this mean?

    If you were sexually active with several people and it would improve your social reputation in other people’s eyes, take 1 step forward.

  47. Social justice assholes are always looking for differences in people instead of similarities. If I wasn’t typing on this iPad I could have written a privilege walk activity that was more unifying. Sample:

    If you were accepted into a once well respected University, take 1 step forward.

  48. Sample 2:

    If you have any level of sexual activity (dating, kissing, intercourse) that you regret because the person turned out to be a douche take 1 step forward.

    Almost universal.

  49. “IMPORTANT: This exercise can be very triggering, so do not do this activity unless you are sure you have plenty of time to debrief and reflect what individuals experienced during the privilege walk.

    Jbahaaa haaa haaaaaa

  50. I won’t pay tuition if Possum wants to go to UM. Not unless there’s some kind of SJW implosion in the next 18 years.

    That reminds me, though, that I need to get her funds set aside PDQ. If she wants college, okay, but I want to make sure she can start a business or buy a house instead. Still trying to discern the right investment for that.

  51. “If you ever use the word ‘trigger’ in a non-ironic way – take one step forward.”

  52. Sample 3:

    If your ancestors came to this country because of crop loss/starvation in their own, incessant warfare, or escape from religious persecution take 1 step forward.

    Almost universal.

  53. If you have any level of sexual activity (dating, kissing, intercourse) that you regret because the person turned out to be a douche take 1 step forward.

    Mare, the reason hundreds of people just stepped forward :)

    *big slobbery pudding kiss right on the mouth*

  54. Welp, it appears they are going with the “the bitch made him do it” theory regarding this latest aberration from the religion of peace.

    Cause like everybody knows its the women in ultra orthodox islamist households that really run the show. Forget about the Burqas and not being allowed outside without a male family member stuff. That’s not how it really works…..

  55. Speaking of triggers, has anyone wondered why in the fuck a government office was having a “holiday” party, during work hours, almost four weeks before Christmas?

  56. Mare, go to New Egg like Scott said and grab a refurbished mac that you like.
    Just make sure that it is OS 10.11.1 compatible.

    Happy Birthday, Car In. Give ’em Hell

  57. If my kids ever pulled any of this bullshit and I was paying for it, I immediately wouldn’t be and they better be fast movers because I’d slap their stupid faces when I saw them.

  58. Compos, you scamp!!

  59. Well, at least your mom isn’t a step forward.

  60. Anyone know if I can take money from a pension fund and roll it into a 529 without having to pay any penalties?

    Well, at least your mom isn’t a step forward.

    Funny mofo XD

  61. Gotta head out. Will check back with you lovely clusters later.

  62. J’ames – I did a music thread on facedouche for my birthday. Lots of good stuff there if you’re interested.

  63. I was gonna look tomorrow, when I can listen to QOTSA and STP.

  64. There’s a lot of diverse stuff. Everyone brought their own flavor – but trying to find stuff I’d like.

  65. We’re supposed to find stuff you’d like?

  66. *searches for Pink Floyd and Fleetwood Mac

  67. *throws a cat, dog, ocelot, and a screech owl in a box*

    *records it*

    *posts on Facebook*

  68. Holiday party was early because government employees have tons of vacation and “holidays”, probably not enough people around after Dec 1. F*rd is similar, I’m taking 3 days of vacation and I’ll be off from Dec 18 to Jan 4.

  69. “, I’m taking 3 days of vacation and I’ll be off from Dec 18 to Jan 4.”


  70. Carin, it’s not my fault. UAW basically forces this on us. I’ll compensate by spending most of the time off reorganizing my office and barn and studying for the job I’m expecting to start in January if not sooner.

    Also Fallout 4.

  71. Guck me. It looks like I’m gonna spend December sending out my resume.

  72. :( Coalex

  73. Sorry CoAlex.

  74. Nothing is confirmed yet. Just sat in a telecom and there will be large staff reductions program wide in a few months.

    I’m hoping that they’ll let me move to part time and I’ll sign up for classes full time.

  75. That sucks, Alex. Let us know if we can help, maybe get with us on LinkedIn.

    SeanM apparently ignored my connection request. Probably because he didn’t recognize the name.

  76. Thanks, everyone. I’m going to apply for a position in Germany next week.

  77. Hey!!!


  78. Speaking on KinkedIn, why haven’t you goobers contacted me?

  79. I am pretty sure we are already connected, EmJay.

  80. If the worst happens, I can always go back to stripping.

  81. Nice boobs MJ. I like the whole skinny chick with big tits vibe she throws off. Even if they’re fakies (I haven’t gone on Boobiepedia to check).

  82. *resists urge to pick low hanging fruit.

  83. NFL Network is replaying TNF with GB-Detroit from 2-5 today. We watched the first half before falling asleep. It sounds like I just need to watch the 4th quarter to get the gist of it.

  84. Last 5 minutes should do it.

  85. Did you see that the media busted into the terrorists apartment today? They messed up a crime scene on live TV.

  86. Pried the plywood off the door.

  87. CNN reporting on how careless CNN is

  88. Feds say they were done with the place (if they weren’t it probably wouldn’t have been left unguarded). Landlord probably tired of them hanging around and being pain in the ass. He efd up, He could have sold a tour of the premise to the highest bidder (it was his property). Now he just gets more media doing a story about how he let them in….

  89. first report I saw said the landlord let them in. If they pried open the door thats B & E.

  90. It’s impossible the FBI was done with the place if it was a terrorist attack. And the FBI themselves said it is. No way they leave IDs and shredded material.

    Something is not right…more than usual.

  91. Obama wants us to focus on the important issues.

  92. Look how long it took the FBI to make it to the Benghazi compound. I trust no one in TFGs DoJ or DHS.

  93. Lippy, I had no idea what Dan had itinerized beyond taking the time off in December for WDW. Slow week for grocery oriented retail. Dan wanted to be under the radar for Florida based family and friends. Once he checked in on FB, it was on. Yesterday, the LEO presence was even higher at the parks.

  94. I spent 15 minutes trying on tiaras. The perfect tiara was $70. Even I’m not frivolous enough to spend $70 on something I’d only wear while online. The $15 and the $35 tiaras were just meh after that.

  95. online tiara? WTF

  96. Wait, Jay isn’t wearing his tiara?



  98. I have to wear pants at work, duh.

  99. WOW, The Hartford Courant has fallen so far. Their latest offer was a weekly subscription for 25 cents a week.

    Commie rag

  100. My tiara is at the cleaners so I’m just wearing my normal tin foil under-tiara.

  101. Dan: Why did you want a tiara anyway? Me: So I can wear it while commenting. Dan:

  102. DL or DW?

  103. Arribas has updo tiaras. I don’t have enough hair for an updo.

  104. DW

  105. Dan is tight. Like Ebenezer. Miserly. Buffet at Germany is shared table. Young Aussie couple asked Dan about tipping. Let’s just say Aaron from Berlin was bitching about a crappy table and leave it there.

  106. You’re going to regret not getting that tiara.

  107. The hats irritate my bald head, so I just tin foiled the whole room. Its my “safe” space.

  108. *whispers to Oso, “Get The Tiaraaaaa”*

  109. I was trying to link the tiara scene from the Big Bang Theory but it ain’t workin’.

    Some lovely person do that for me? The 35 second version.


  111. I think Dan out manuevered me. He’s the one that handed me the $70 tiara. I was happily trying on the $15 tiaras, but noooooo. The $70 tiara was perfect. Curses.

  112. Love that scene

  113. SCORE!!! Thanks Scott!!! (I’m getting a tiara)

  114. I’ll bring it to TITS 2 and we can take turns wearing it.

  115. You’re getting it?! Squeeeeeee!

  116. You and MJ will be Twinkies!!!

  117. Pretty sure. Dan after watching TBBT clip: Fine, you can get your tiara.

  118. (I’m leaning towards a $15 tiara. Don’t tell Dan)

  119. I think my grass is still growing.

    In the 50’s all weekend.

  120. The Five is being preempted by the Muslim killer’s attorney who is reminding everyone that there is no signs this was terrorism. He mentioned that someone made fun of his beard once. I don’t remember the other No Shave November Massacres.

  121. Dan is such a Southwesterner. We were on an elevator with a family today. Get off elevator, Dan: What language were they speaking? Me: English. Dan: Me: ENGLISH! She said “What happened?” He said “We fell for the getting off on the wrong floor trick”.

  122. Thanks Scott!!!

  123. Cyn linked it too. She must have deleted it.

  124. And she beat me, so she deserves the credit.

  125. Day 34 Beard Update: The reaction to my beard has been pretty much uniformly positive. That said, if anybody were to make fun of it, I’m fairly certain my natural reaction would not be to go grab a family member and a rented SUV full of ammo and explosives and murder and maim dozens of people.

    I’m just saying is all.


  127. L to R: H2, IB

  128. I just don’t have a damn thing to contribute here today.

  129. Good one, Sean!

  130. The hats irritate my bald head, so I just tin foiled the whole room. Its my “safe” space.

    So, just for the sake of our loyal commentariat, I feel I have the duty to inform you that while the foil will stop the mind control rays, it lights up like the sun to the radar they use to find dissidents.

  131. It will stop millimeter-wave from penetrating and getting n00ds of you, though.

  132. Osita, I love the “commenting tiara” idea. Future me after acquiring such item:

    *sits alone bareheaded, starts typing comment, head whips up, hits back button till words disappear, runs and finds tiara, begins typing again*

  133. I just don’t have a damn thing to contribute here today.

    Pfffft. Never stopped me before.

  134. Happy birthday, Car in.


  136. Sean, did you see my LinkedIn invite?

  137. Comment by Colorado Alex on December 4, 2015 1:09 pm

    ” I’m going to apply for a position in Germany next week.”

    Nobody jumped on this? What’s wrong with you people?

    What position? Fuhrer? Immigration coordinator? Oktoberfest waitress inspector?

  138. Sean is probably just shunning you, Leon.

  139. That’s the only reasonable explanation, Pepe.

  140. That or like me, Sean hasn’t signed into Linkdin in months.

  141. Sean, did you see my LinkedIn invite?

    My pile of LinkedIn emails has gotten so huge that I don’t dare go near it lest I cause an avalanche. Sorry.

  142. *remains shunned*

  143. TITS III, Oktoberfest Edition! 2017, Bavaria. Be there.

    Live target practice in the Black Forest!

    *shops for dirndl*

  144. I would accept your LinkedIn invite, except I have no idea what it is, what your name is, and I’m neither hiring, nor looking for a job.

  145. Thanks Pepe, that helps my shattered self-esteem.

  146. I have a fake LinkedIn profile:

    Sr. Bed Dust Director

  147. I would check LinkedIn more often, but I find I’m just soooooooooo busy on Google+ all the time.

  148. Oh MJ, that’s just … oh. How is that physique physically possible?

    You little furry bastard, I can’t unsee that.

  149. I’m connected to you, Leon. Would you like skills and expertise clicks? I never click on those unless people ask for them.

  150. I was on Google+ long enough to realize that one of my friends is too leftist to cogitate rationally, and that the remainder of the content I was seeing was trite nothingness, so I quit. It was everything I expected from Facechimp and I wasn’t even getting updates from my extended family because no one uses Google+ but ‘tards.

  151. I’m not sure those even matter, Roamy. I don’t think LI is ever going to lead to a job, I really just use it to keep in touch with former and current coworkers.

  152. Happy B’Day, Car In!

  153. HBD CI.


  154. Congrats on not dying for another year, Ca rin.

  155. I turn 40 a week from Tuesday. Mid-life crisis time.

  156. MJ is trying to get banned.

  157. B&.

  158. Yeah, I had high hopes for Walsh, but he’s been a failure. Of course, SecAF James has been a disaster as well, but I expected that.

  159. MJ won’t be B&, because of the Kardashian filter. Also Bruce Jenner. And Caitlyn.

  160. Leon is drunk

  161. Did you turn it off or did I not trigger it? Kim Kardashian.

    And I’m merely buzzed. I’m on kid duty all day tomorrow, so light cocktails this evening.

  162. Must have worked on the last one. Yay!

  163. Did anybody actually kick anybody else out of bed because they were eating crackers today?

  164. Bedtime.

  165. Yes

  166. Really?

  167. *hides crackers under pillow*

  168. “Crackers”

  169. That said, if anybody were to make fun of it, I’m fairly certain my natural reaction would not be to go grab a family member and a rented SUV full of ammo and explosives and murder and maim dozens of people.


  170. Happy birthday carin. I got you one of these:

  171. I named my penis “Crackers” back in 86 just to see if anyone would eat it in bed. So far……nothing.

  172. Did Erica respond promptly?

  173. Erica was vetted and found lacking.

  174. I’m stating to worry about derp. Search party?

  175. Sorry if I’m intruding seanm, but I’m worried that yoube drifted off without seeping and I don’t want us to have a break in shitholedump tradition.

    Substitute derp:

    My first rifle was a 243.
    Papa gave yo daddy and daddy gave to me.
    Fought me how to derp with a steady hand.
    I guess that’s just sumpn you don’t understand.

  176. Man I fucked that up.

    Insomnia sucks. I may have to go back to binge drinking.


    Wakey wakey.

    I don’t even know what I’m saying.

    **steals everybody else’s schtick while blog is blacked out**

  178. I was gonna steal Leon’s shit too but I lack the vocabulary.

  179. I guess everyone moved on to H3, PG. Or maybe straight to H8.

  180. Ww

  181. Not a fan of this time zone. Football starts TOO L8.

  182. I am on Possum Patrol all day. First tantrum is already behind us. Wife’s been eating too much cabbage lately so the baby is gassy. I think it’s also making her temperamental. That or she’s just getting interested in the world and thus harder to entertain.

  183. Time to start her crate training, Leon. Pretty sure you should leave girls in the crate until they’re at least 18.


  185. I dated an 18yo that needed a crate, so that’s not long enough.


  187. I simmered a turkey carcass yesterday and have some turkey soup simmering now. I’ll be honest, I like the smell of chicken soup much better.

  188. I should thaw one of the chickens so I can cook it overnight, otherwise I won’t get to cook for tomorrow.

  189. Which college games are supposed to be good today? I’ve heard “championship weekend” on all the sportscast but I’ll be damned if I know which teams are playing.

    (and I mean football Clint, not basketball)

  190. To your soup, add one bay leaf and about a teaspoon of savory and a beef bullion cube. Fixted.

  191. My turkey carcass soup is delicious. Richer than chicken. Yum. I can’t stop eating it.

  192. Crazy Cat Lady an I did not leave any Carcass for soup. Today I am making lasag a, enchiladas, and pizza.

  193. From FB this morning “Duct tape can’t fix stupid, but it can muffle the sound”

  194. Bay leaf is a great idea. We may have beef bouillon. Definitely do not own the savory.

    I put in carrots, mushrooms and some rice. In addition to a bunch of spices I add this too or something just like it (which I buy from the co op bulk section):

  195. Did not add duct tape to the soup


  197. So my modem crapped out. The folks at Cox helped diagnose the problem. Good thing is that the old modem had docsis 2.0, whatever the hell that is, and the new modem has docsis 3.0.

    I installed the new one, called Cox so they could change a setting and BAM! internet speed doubled.

  198. Suhweet, Scott.

    I have always been really pleased with the service I get from Cox.

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