Enjoy Every Sandwich

Memento mori

Blarney Castle

No

Plankton and Radio “Invention”

163 Comments

  1. The game isn’t over by any stretch but the Patriots are working the Bills over pretty good. Were the Bills that good last week or did the Colts just suck?

  2. Curse you, Krabs!

  3. Mi Gusta EspongeBob.

    15 years and runnin’

  4. I just got word that a co-worker from my previous job was found hanging from a tree in his back yard this morning. His wife had moved out on him yesterday afternoon. Nicest fucking guy you’d ever meet. He’d drop whatever he was doing to help you out. There must’ve been some severe and ongoing psychic pain in his life for him to have gone through with it. Makes you think about your own existence.

  5. Sorry, PG.

  6. Thats very sad, Pendeko. Its good that he has you to tell is what a good guy you knew.

  7. Giants blew another one today. Two weeks in a row I walk away from the TV when they have the game in the bag, only to learn later they lost.

  8. Pats came close to blowing their lead. It’s like they gave up in the 4th quarter.

  9. Sorry to hear about you friend PG.

    Been unloading truck and trailer all day.

  10. PD, very sad news, sorry to lose a sweet one.

    Some very sad news today with MKH too.

    If I come back later and I say something stupid (if you don’t expect that you haven’t been paying attention) it’s just to have some fun here.

  11. Still moving?

  12. That’s terrible news about your friend, PG. Glad I got the chance to hug a few people today.

  13. This Cowboys vs Eagles game is terrible football.

  14. This Cowboys vs Eagles game is terrible football.

    Not 10 seconds after I read that Bradford fumbled and Paula let loose with “Jeebus, looks like high school”.

  15. Alex, in your new POL is that you on the right?

  16. Bradford looks about as confused as xbrad was that time Dolly sprung a leak and he couldn’t find the patch adhesive.

  17. Sad news PG.

  18. Sean, the WC race is killing me. K I L L I N G me!

  19. Shhhhh. Shhhhhh. It’ll all be over soon.

  20. Thanks. I hadn’t talked to him in several years, but last time I called him he dropped everything he was doing and busted his ass to help me get a stranded crew fed until I could get some folks over there to pick them up.

  21. That is what real friendship is. The drop everything even without contact kind of friendship.

  22. Huh, Manziel. Shoot, Winston won. Marriota had a not so great day. Missed some good ones today. Peter king is a gigantic asshole.

  23. Friend from Taiwan got in contact with me on Thursday. A friend we’d all been looking for. 3 straight days of my phone blowing up with texts. Dan: What could you possibly have to say to someone you haven’t seen in 40 years? Me: Umm, 40 years of catching up?

  24. Mare forgot the BIRM after “Peter King is a gigantic asshole”

  25. Saw a couple of guys at my dad’s funeral I hadn’t seen in years. Separated by geography and life events but we picked right up. It was a good feeling.

  26. Sorry about your friend, PG.

    I am worried about one of the guys at church. His wife kicked him out, and he was crying after Mass last night. He was supposed to be at the K of C breakfast this morning and didn’t show. I don’t have his cell number, and the number in the directory is the house phone, where she’s at.

  27. Bob Costas on the Sunday Night Football Pre game is enough to make me want to listen to a continuous loop of Hillary laughing.

  28. Somebody named their kid Tyrod?

  29. Shoot, Roamy, sorry to hear that too. What the heck is going on? Everyone just know tomorrow is another day, possibly the best day of your life!

  30. What does BIRM mean, Oso?

    *borrows Chumpo’s onion belt again*

  31. You never know what people are going through. You look at someone you’ve known forever or those you’ve never met and you just don’t know the burden they carry.

  32. Also, for no apparent reason:

    http://tinyurl.com/nc8jdcz

  33. What’s a WC race?

  34. BIRM=But I Repeat Myself. In this instance, it is understood that Peter King is an asshole. Goes without saying. Implied by saying Peter King in the first place. I usually use ITFP. (Ignores Scott pretending to not know WC is Wild Card in baseball context)

  35. I was going to say, they stopped calling it the Winston Cup 10 years ago.

  36. That juan mean But I Repeat Myself

    I know Dad forbade anymore Tabs BUT I move we start just one more which will define assorted modern ACRONYMS.

    Why not. There clearly is a need AND it would be a fun project. The Lord knows we need some funny up in here.

  37. I miss The Winston Cup. I used to steal my moms Winstons. Those babys were good.

  38. *Narrows eyes at Scott* When have Sean and I ever discussed racing?

  39. Bob Costas on the Sunday Night Football Pre game is enough to make me want to listen to a continuous loop of Hillary laughing.

    That right there is mare’s musings GOLD.

  40. Mr Chumpo, most of my acronyms come from the HQ.

  41. Left, IB…Right, H2:

    http://tinyurl.com/onkkwku

  42. Oh, sorry Oso. I should have known that lingo. I went to urban dictionary and they gave me some cocked up junk.

  43. Ace is my acronym supplier.

  44. Its the 2nd week of football, I figured baseball was over.

  45. Baseball isn’t over until the fat lady sings. Not even warming up!

  46. Looks like Mare had a fun time……
    http://tinyurl.com/nfpfzqf

  47. Bob Costas is such a pretentious douche…..

  48. I know that.
    Also, please know that im not casting a jaundiced eye your way for using modern day ACRONYMS. We all could grow slightly by having a handy TAB at this site that defines the myriad new-fangled ACRONYMS.
    As far as it goes, Osiiter you are my sole window into the Facebook type interwebs and I would be glad to spearhead the ACRONYM tab as soon as I can get a second on mine motion and Cyn et al show me how to make a new tab.

  49. We should have an acronym post. Could be fun. Throws flag on Pepe. Needed the BIRM.

  50. At work, we’re supposed to say “Happy to help” like the “My pleasure” trolls at H8CHKN. I’ve been saying HTH since it rolled out.

  51. 2nd

  52. You just make a new page instead of a poat chumpo. Pretty sure the pages tab themselves.

    YJMANPIOAPC

    PSTPTT

  53. No worries.

    Absolutely.

    My pleasure.

    – Outback Steakhouse Magic Words

  54. I lit-tra-lee have no idea what the hell anyone is saying.

  55. Anyone know how Anita is doing?

  56. Mare: Pressing 1 for English since 2009

  57. http://is.gd/RJNK3E

  58. Ha hahahah…Good one, Oso.

  59. Hahahah a…good one, Pups.

  60. >>>>We all could grow slightly by having a handy TAB at this site

    FYNQ

  61. Pups, my husband got a kick out of that one.

  62. See! HQ Acronym. Wiser is JUST LIKE ME!!! Squeee!!!

  63. >>>Anyone know how Anita is doing?

    wait… What????

    OH HELLZ NO!

    She is one of sweetest women ever and NOTHING is wrong….
    .
    .
    .
    right?

  64. Lolololol…… Wiser and the tabs. Oh, my, gosh, remember that?

  65. WTFITS?

  66. Wiser, I’m sorry I made you worry, Anita was stung several times by bees had a horrible reaction and Chrispy was not sure about his decision not to bring her to the ER.

  67. we need a tab for TrumpEnglish too:

    from an interview with Georgie Suckalumpapus:

    GEORGE STEPHANOPOULOS, “THIS WEEK” HOST: Let’s get into this controversy over the last couple of days. I saw your tweets yesterday, you said you didn’t have a morally responsibility when that question came up about President Obama. But this is getting a lot of attention in part because you have raised questions like this in the past. So, for the record, was President Obama born in the United States?

    DONALD TRUMP: Well, you know, I don’t get into, George, I’m talking about jobs, military, I don’t get into it. They asked the questions. Frankly, it’s no longer an interest to me. It’s something I don’t want to talk about. I want to talk about the vets and the military. I want to talk about jobs. I don’t get into that, George.

    STEPHANOPOULOS The way to get behind it is answer yes or no —

    TRUMP: That’s possible, but I don’t talk about it.

    STEPHANOPOULOS: Even though you raised questions and you investigated this in the past —

    TRUMP: Well, people thought I should have defended the president in terms of the question that was asked the other night. My attitude is, would he have done that for me? He’s been very capable of defending himself, believe me. So, we’ll see what happens. But I think the tweets really covered it cell. I actually was very interested because I got in hot water for not saying anything. First time it’s ever happened to me. This is something where I didn’t even say anything.

    STEPHANOPOULOS: I take that point. But you raised these questions so often in the past, why can’t you say definitively yes or not? You raised it many times. And he’s not a Muslim.

    TRUMP: George, you have raised the question. I haven’t raised the question. I don’t talk about it. But I don’t talk other people’s faith. Not appropriate for me to talk about somebody else’s faith.

    STEPHANOPOULOS The other big premise of that question, he said, Muslims are a problem many this country, do you agree?

    TRUMP: In some cases, George, we can say no, and you can be politically correct and say everything’s wonderful. Certainly it’s a problem. And there’s a problem —

    STEPHANOPOULOS What is the problem specifically?

    TRUMP: At the same time, we have fabulous people living here, Muslims, and they have done fantastically well, but certainly it’s a problem. You look around the world, it’s a problem. If I said no, not at all, people would laugh at me. Now, it might be the right thing to say. I don’t care what the right thing to say is, but certainly what’s happening with some Muslims and, you know, terrorism and everything else, it seems pretty much confined there. It’s a problem. We can say no, but it is.”

    Does he ever speak in a complete or moderately coherent sentence???

  68. Lolololol…… Wiser and the tabs. Oh, my, gosh, remember that?

    Nope. Somebody deleted the tab where all the poats where people freaked out and stormed off in a huff were archived.

  69. Chumpo, you know how to do it.

    Look at the tabs, two of them are yours.

  70. How did the leaky faucet story end?

  71. >>>>Wiser, I’m sorry I made you worry, Anita was stung several times by bees had a horrible reaction and Chrispy was not sure about his decision not to bring her to the ER.

    *whew

    But still, good thoughts going out to the sweet AnitaP…

    * giggle

    “AnitaP”

    *snicker

  72. Really Sean? Well if it’s sensitive I better not go there.

  73. Mare, just chatted with AnitaP. (Snicker) She’s planning mass murder of hornets. After church even. Snagglepuss’d/

  74. >>>
    How did the leaky faucet story end?

    Is fixed. Required new seats. Which HD employee found behind about 4 other items. I told him “yeah, you probably don’t have these.” And he moved like 4 things off a peg and said “here.”

    I tried a real plumbing supply place, but they said “you’re only gonna get those at HD.”

    Great

  75. Oso, I’m the one on the left side of the picture and wearing a tux.

  76. >>>>Nope. Somebody deleted the tab where all the poats where people freaked out and stormed off in a huff were archived.

    OH GOD DAMMIT DO WE HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS AGAIN??!?!?!?

  77. Thank you, Oso. So she’s a close to a 100%?

  78. She’s cracking jokes. I told her about the H2 love.

  79. Why haven’t we had a softball update? Why Wiserbud, WHY???? Kerrigan’d

  80. It’s hard to find anything on that pegboard unless you know where to look. People are constantly putting stuff back in the wrong location.

    I knew they they had a Pfister repair kit, I just didn’t remember what was in it.

  81. *deletes random tab with extreme malice

  82. Any bets on how long before Wiser accidentally deletes the main blog?

  83. >>>Why haven’t we had a softball update? Why Wiserbud, WHY???? Kerrigan’d

    ’cause we lost. I pitched like crap today, took me six innings before I could consistently find the strike zone.

    Only walked one guy, but that’s because they refused to take the walk.

  84. Alex, I asked because there is NO reason based on your looks why women aren’t throwing their phone numbers at you….and I’m not even a beard person.

    A) I don’t have one and

    B) unless you are Delta or a Navy Seal don’t generally like them vs clean cut…getting to see the whole face.

  85. >>>>Any bets on how long before Wiser accidentally deletes the main blog?

    “Accidentally ”

    *snicker

  86. >>>>and I’m not even a beard person.

    *cough

  87. Alex, do you have dimples? If so, shave your beard immediately…trust me.

  88. *cough

    ——

    *accidently kicks Wiser in the left nut*

    *cough*

  89. amd now you know why I wear a cup even off the field.

  90. Alex, I asked because there is NO reason based on your looks why women aren’t throwing their phone numbers at you

    Well, mare, if you ever bothered to meet with any of us in person, you might know about the odor.

  91. Mare, thanks. No dimples, unfortunately.

  92. I knew they they had a Pfister repair kit, I just didn’t remember what was in it.

    Plumbing, Aisle 8.

  93. Oso loves Sean. Can’t stop laughing.

  94. Well, mare, if you ever bothered to meet with any of us in person, you might know about the odor.

    as well as the misshapen….

    well, let’s just move on….

  95. Chumpo, you know how to do it.

    Look at the tabs, two of them are yours.

    SUNUVABITCH!!!!!

    brb

  96. I think he’s at a difficult age Mare.

    I don’t know how old he is, but being single after 30 is difficult. Most of the dating pool is pretty damaged.

    Most, not all, I was 35 when I met Laura.

  97. Well, I see where this is going. You all are forcing me to become emotionally involved in this football game.

    Fu…and TABS, TABS, TABS.

  98. Those two aisles have about 10,000 items in them.

    It takes about a year to learn, and then management decides to rearrange everything.

  99. Does he ever speak in a complete or moderately coherent sentence???

    It’s still an improvement over 0bama. He speaks clearly and concisely but every word is fiction. At least Trump isn’t saying anything.

  100. Dating pool is damaged and likely to have kids. FTFY

  101. Fixed That For You/ HQ’d

  102. I just turned 33. The dating pool in Colorado Springs is pretty limited, not to mention that I want kids and a lot of them, so dating older women is out of ten picture.

  103. kiddie pool

  104. Scott, I Agee. My divorced friend (age 55) has given me insight into the world of single women and it isn’t pretty. Alex wants children so I can only imagine how much crazier it is.

    But I do believe in fate…God’s plan. And I’m hoping Alex’s includes meeting a good woman, soon.

  105. Trump makes Cankles sound like she’s speaking Beltway. Both are FoS. (Full of Shit)

  106. Every action Obama takes is against this country. Every single one.

  107. I hope to fuck my wife outlives me.

  108. I think Alex’s primary limiter is the location/pool. Online may or may not help. I found it useless or less than, but that was 12 years ago.

  109. …Or stay fit and live a long time. Women probably outnumber the men 3:1 at The Villlages.

  110. Most of my classmates in nursing school are VERY lovely young women who are positively oriented to having families, and they tend to date much older guys, because guys close to their age are as infants to them. Just FYI.

  111. Most of my classmates in nursing school are VERY lovely young women who are positively oriented to having families, and they tend to date much older guys, because guys close to their age are as infants to them. Just FYI.

    Hellooooooooooooooooooooo nurse.

  112. OTOH, Connecticut.

    Are any of them willing to move to Colorado to marry an intel analyst and blacksmithing enthusiast?

  113. Comment by pendejogrande on September 20, 2015 9:26 pm
    I hope to fuck my wife outlives me.

    —–

    I don’t know what that means, but I want to know.

  114. I’m saying that nursing students are different than most college-age kids, Leon. Nothing about Connecticut.

  115. Online has been a bust for the most part. I’m talking to one lady through Tinder which might be promising. Otherwise, Bo luck through any of the pay sites.

  116. PG doesn’t want to have to deal with a future without Mrs PG. He’s Dan with less booze.

  117. Colorado has nurses, I think.

  118. Mare(&Wiserbub),
    Anita is doing fine, and playing “Summertime” on the viola.
    She sent the Doc an e-mail telling him to give her a ‘scrip for Epi-Pens.
    I should have called 911 and let the medics take her to the ER.
    Anaphylaxis is NOT cool…

  119. You know how the guys on my team at work let me down? I’d put my classmates, prim little Tiffany or Amber in their place, all day long. I know absolutely that I could count on those hardworking little girls to back me up when work presents itself, while the gutless weasels go pirouetting to the break room.

  120. CO nurses are in Trinidad and specialize in Transgender surgery.

  121. The girls have been told all their lives that they can work hard and accomplish things. The boys have been told they were rapists.

  122. Oh, PD, for some reason, I added my own punctuation and it gave me a whole different meaning.

    I, too, hope my husband outlives me. We are mates for sure and the thought of being single (certainly not through divorce, it’s not going to happen) in my mid 50’s until death is horrible but dating men in their 50’s or older kind of sickens me. Although I’m aware these are men MY age. Not interested in your medical troubles, your ED, your prostate, your blood pressure, your hips or knees, anything. Don’t want to know.

    *It doesn’t help that my husband is very physically fit, attractive and healthy.

  123. I’ve been Joy Beharing my nursing friends for their Dr Stethoscopes. They are salt of the earth. Threw a man bun at work under the bus today. Team Lauraw.

  124. Excellent, Chrispy!!

  125. If they are also white, they have been told that they were racists and responsible for every bad thing that has ever happened.

  126. Online dating is a scam.

    Sane women don’t have to pay to find dates.

  127. Of course, they could just be lazy sods, but it can’t be an accident that the entire generation appears to be brain damaged.

  128. And my husband makes me laugh all the time.

  129. They boys have all been raised by single mothers who always hired a handyman and who told them that they were too good for manual labor.

  130. Alex, I’ve heard tinder is kind of a skank’s paradise. More of a “hook-up” deal than a “dating to meet someone great” deal.

    Even on The Berry, they highlight the skankyness of tinder.

  131. Oso, what did he do?

  132. Is Tinder the “swipe right, swipe left” deal?

  133. Mare knows things.

  134. Also, I don’t want to explain to a new “date” that my left hip is iffy and show them my belly fat (I mean it’s not Lena Dunham but…). Nope.

  135. Leon, it’s really not political; the young male nursing students are equally awesome. I have a lot of respect for this particular cohort of younguns and have become fond of many of them. I would never have expected to meet a bunch of kids with this kind of work ethic. It must be a self-selecting type of situation, wrt occupation/ acumen.

  136. And HTF do I explain the H2 to a new date?

    Nope. Won’t work. My husband has never been to the H2 but I think he gets it.

  137. *swipes left on Mare*

  138. Chappie was walking around with Erick the Black Panther. 30 minutes of jacking it. TL in Electronics was trying to find Chappie. Me: He’s been walking around with Erick in grocery for 30. Maybe his radio doesn’t work? Laziest POS ever!!! His hips are wider than his chest. We have a man bun member that co-ordinates his skinny jeans to his half boots. I keep waiting for him to break out “The Candyman” or “Mr Bojangles”. Gheyest outfit ever.

  139. Leon, does swipe left mean, “no”?

    And if so…

  140. Self selecting, lauraw.

  141. 30 minutes of jacking it.

    That’s gotta chafe, and it’s really no good for your mental health.

  142. *swipes right on mare

  143. They were looking for chafee.

  144. They were looking for chafee.

    Shoulda gone a few meters to the left.

  145. Gross. Glad I don’t work there.

  146. It is sofa king there. WalMart is committed to millennial Members and associates. I get so tired of re-wording everything to PC speak.

  147. My marriage is being tested. I found trebuchet axles in my freezer. At least they were in bags so that the lube (your whore mouth, shut it) was not touching food.

  148. It would have gone over a lot better if there had been a heads up, “Hey, the bearings won’t go on, so we’re trying to shrink it to get more clearance” rather than me holding bags of groceries in front of the open freezer, staring at hardware, and thinking “WTFITS?”

  149. On the next episode of Redneck Engineers….

  150. Roamy,
    Once upon a time, I had the valve-guides for a friends aircraft engine in the freezer, and the cylinders in the oven.
    When everything was at temp, Anita held the cylinders on a couple of 2×4 chunks on the kitchen-floor with oven-mitts, while I drifted the frozen valve-guides in to place.
    The oven smelled funny, for a while…

  151. Laura,
    In school, have they covered anaphlaxis?
    How long is there a danger for cardiac effects after the initial assault?

  152. Comment by pendejogrande on September 20, 2015 9:26 pm

    I hope to fuck my wife ………

    ==========

    What a coincidence………….

  153. Dinner on the go.
    http://is.gd/0wg1ME

    I didn’t even know that this was a youtube category, but now I’m like, *of course.*

  154. Crispy, I’m afraid my class is only just starting the nitty-gritty stuff. I can’t answer your question.

  155. Roamy, could’ve been organ meat. Lengua. Tripas.

  156. I mean, I don’t know the answer. I’m still two years out from becoming a nurse, man. And at that point I will still be a rank beginner.

  157. Did anybody tell anybody else that they’d never get away with this while struggling to free themselves from their shackles today?

  158. Laura,
    Thanks. Jimbro is at the camp, or I would have asked him.
    I guess “Err on the side of caution” is the way to go…

  159. Always, ChrisP.

  160. Pup. You are man’s best friend.

  161. Anyone else singing Enjoy every sandwich to Climb ever mountain or just me?

  162. Jennifer Juniper, derp of golden flax
    Jennifer Juniper, longs for what she lacks
    Do you like her? Yes, I do, sir
    Would you love her? Yes, I would, sir
    Whatcha doing, Jennifer, my love?

  163. i wonder if Jenny J ever pined for Mellow Yellow


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