Camp Wire

 

Put yer, um, hands together and welcome Paul Whackers.

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Born in New Haven in 1978, Whackers went to school in D.C. and did his post grad in S.F.

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Whackers enjoys painting the still life.

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Thank you for viewing.

 

Have a Wonderful day.

 

223 Comments

  1. Last week it was Otto Dix. This week Paul Whackers.

    DIX-WHACKERS !!!

    WHACKERS-DIX !!!

    I ask all you fair-minded people, is this just a bizarre coincidence? Or the inner workings of a madman writ large on the pages of this fine blog?

  2. We’re all just characters in Mr. Chumpo’s dream.

    *sips coffee

  3. It is cool how all of Chumpo’s choices view the subject in strictly unique ways.

    And generally any art I like, must be art I cannot do. Hence the, “oh, wow” factor.

  4. Got the job offer I was looking for last night.

    Back to working from home!

    In other words, prepare to be horrified all day by constant stream of consciousness.

  5. Man, I’d love to work from home.

  6. Looking forward to it!

    Congrats MJ

  7. Exactly what Jimbro said, MJ!

    You hot little commodity, you!

  8. “any art I like”

    art whore

  9. art whore

    —–

    Well, hey, I’m not liking* it for free.

    *was super careful not to type licking

  10. I’m glad to see Cyn is alive.

  11. Congrats, MJ

  12. Did Paul name his daughter Tallie by any chance?

  13. *throws flag, simultaneously blows whistle

    *points to PD

    *penalizes him 15 yards for “joke”

    *picks up flag, gets burger (with fries)

  14. blows whistle…

    gross

  15. Back to working from home!

    That’s what’s up.

  16. “blows whistle ”

    did you wash it first?

  17. Quality of life just increased to 10 from 2.

  18. a perfect metaphor for our gubmint’:
    http://tinyurl.com/nkw87nw

    audio at 29 seconds in says it all –

  19. Interesting artwork, Chumpo.

    Not my cup of tea, but to each his own. These weekly posts have been quite fascinating – appreciate you doing them!

  20. Thanks T.

    Not really mine either but all boats rise together on The Wire.

    Have a good’n.

  21. Grats MJ. I’m still waiting to talk to potential future boss.

    Thanks for abs and glasses girl yesterday, Pepe, she was lovely.

  22. This is bull crap.

  23. Chipmunks were burrowing along side my foundation. Set a rat trap in front of the hole. So far I’ve nuked three of the fuckers.

    Sorry, Jewstin. It has to be done.

  24. Alvin, Simon, Theodore.

    Good riddance.

  25. Hahahahaha

  26. So confession time… I’ve been taking a drawing class this semester.

    coloradoalex.wordpress.com

  27. We had chipmunks.

  28. Did you smoke them?

  29. They like to climb to the top of things.
    Place a rock in your yard at a convenient sniping distance.

    In 2 days they will be gone.

  30. Great Poatsy, Chumpo!

    Congrats on the new gig, MJ!

    Nice work, GlobeAlex!

    *collapses back to bed zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  31. Alex, you scamp, you truly are a man of many interests. (Everyone shut your whore mouths or you’ll get my pimp hand).

    http://tinyurl.com/o8xgqgn

  32. Related:

    http://tinyurl.com/nv4wv9v

    hahahahaha

  33. Cyn, before you go back to bed, can you tell me why I keep getting logged out after almost every comment?

  34. Are you making sure that there’s a check mark next to “Keep me logged in”?

  35. Yes, Ma’am.

  36. It’s the H2 equivalent of the bitchslap.

  37. Also, WerdPuss is a frighteningly mean smug bitch who needs to be dealt with after school under the bleachers at the football field.

  38. who needs to be dealt with after school under the bleachers at the football field.

    ——

    On it!

  39. On what screen are logging in?

  40. Place a rock in your yard at a convenient sniping distance.

    ——

    Like Pups said, “Scott’s a thinker!”

  41. It says I’m logged in on the home screen but when I comment I get the: Log into WordPress bs.

  42. Close your browser and dump your cache; then log in from here:
    https://wordpress.com/wp-login.php

  43. Is it prugged in? Try prugging it in.

  44. Ahh, gotcha. I think that worked last time! Forgot. D’OH.

  45. Okay good; well, I hope that fixes it anyway.

  46. Test

  47. testing

  48. Nope, damn it.

  49. tester

  50. When was the last time that you didn’t have this problem? I think you’re using the wrong log-in, or you’re double logged in maybe.

  51. Hey, maybe got this.

    best 5 comments ever!

  52. Yep – that got it. Looks like before you were logging in thru gravitar but now it looks like you’re in with your a(h)ol(e)-log-in.

  53. It’s prostate cancer.

    Better get it checked.

  54. Giving mare the keys to this place would be like putting her in charge of the wine box inventory.

  55. Putting Mare in charge of the wine box inventory would ensure that there was always plenty on hand. I’m not seeing a problem here.

  56. Fuch it,

    1 Indian.

  57. I think we have enough whine around here.

  58. I’m glad to see you people have nothing to do but jabber-jaw all day!

  59. “you people”

  60. …and drink beer. And work on my Bambi Impersonations.

  61. I’m not entirely sure I’ve ever actually seen Bambi.

  62. Ahh, the laundry is done. . . for today!

  63. Bambi is a tool of patriarchy.

  64. We people.

  65. Ahh, the laundry is done. . . for today!

    Mine’s not. Get crackalackin.

  66. Hotspur – Sorry, ran out of clothes stops. They only issued us so many in Boot Camp, yannow!

  67. MJ means “wee people.”

  68. Hahahaha

    Clothes stops – those fucking things.

  69. This is pretty effin cool.

    http://www.businessinsider.com/gopro-footage-from-the-edge-of-space-2015-9

  70. Comment by MJ on September 15, 2015 1:25 pm
    Giving mare the keys to this place would be like putting her in charge of the wine box inventory.

    ——-

    Indubitably

  71. Thanks Cyn.

    You’re not an asshole like the male dipshits around here.

    But I mean that in a nice way.

  72. Jay, that is cool and he was a stud as a marine.

  73. Niece and the kids are here.

  74. I’m not entirely sure I’ve ever actually seen Bambi.

    Jesus dies at the end.

  75. Hotshot, that’s a nice video. I also like the way you put your band’s music over the visuals!

    are you all available for hire? I bet you could make hundreds.

  76. I’m available for hire to drive the bus next time.

  77. heheheheh. Ok. Next time seems too far away. Come out west when it gets cold. I’ll book some rooms at The Joshua Tree Inn. It’s cool.

  78. Supreme cuteness to wash away the filth of the day:

    http://tinyurl.com/nzkd49q

  79. Nice work, CoAl. Congrats on working from home, MJ. My Bambi impressions are Flower and Bambi.

  80. My Dumbo impressions are the crows.

  81. Ok, so what should we complain about now?

  82. Fuck’s Carin been all day?

  83. Mj, when does the new job start?

  84. Hotspur, did you ever tell us how the getaway to Fire Island, I mean the Grand Hotel went.

  85. It went well. We had a great time with our friends from FL. It was a little chilly at times, but it’s better to go after Labor Day than in the summer.

    Not as many fucking kids.

  86. Are these the friends you wife swap with?

  87. HA!

  88. Not this time.

  89. Mexican Word of the Day: URINE

    If you voted for Obama twice urine idiot.

  90. Nacho father’s Cadillac.

  91. Taco ’bout Pop Music.

  92. http://is.gd/lk8hF3

  93. OMG, I got my flu shot today and it feels like somebody jerked my arm out of the socket.

  94. Todos somos Americanos. *spit*

  95. Dana Perino on The Five while they are talking about Bernie and Uncle Joe, “I’m for what hurts Hillary Clinton’s campaign. I’m for Hillary Clinton.”

  96. Wha?

  97. Ouch, lauraw

  98. You’ll be happy to know I passed my gov’t ethics exam today.

    One of the contractors asked me what questions were on it (they don’t have to take it). I answered, “How much money can Hillary accept in return for deleting emails? None, Hillary will do it for free. How much money can Bill accept for a greet-and-grope? $250K as long as there’s hot and cold running hookers.” and so on.

  99. Our new computer arrived today and it is screaming fast.

    New Egg is awesome, we only paid $140 and that included shipping.

  100. New computer and new egg? 1%ers!!!!

  101. Roamy, did he catch your references or did you have to rocketsplain?

  102. I’ve got a friend putting together a computer from New Egg, Gonna be around $1,200. Really need more horsepower for the 3D CAD program I’m using.

  103. He’s hip, though he hadn’t heard hot and cold running hookers before.

    He came up with “May John Boehner deduct tanning lotion costs?”

  104. Heh. Nice. Could be future funneh thread.

  105. http://is.gd/5aIjeF

  106. Because I don’t know how to do gifs, nobody else is allowed to either.

  107. Evening.

  108. Love the dog shaming vids.

  109. Howdy, Jewstin.

  110. Paulatics?

  111. I’m working from home, but it’s no good. They’ll want me to come back to the office eventually.

  112. Paulatics is my transgender identity. Don’t mess with it. You’ll be sorry.

  113. It’s been so long since Paulitics has been here, we need to ask how many bullwhips he has shoved up his ass. ??

  114. No can someone tell me how to do gifs?

  115. http://is.gd/zjQCcm

  116. Are you talking creating gifs or linking gifs so that they don’t blow up in the comments, Paul?

  117. Copying a gif I see on a website or in an email and pasting them in here or in an email.

  118. Just paste the link. Blowing up the comments raises Chief’s blood pressure, which we like.

  119. ^^ that will do it

  120. Posting John Denver music has the same results.

  121. Thanks, Hotspur.

    The rest of you may now return to your regularly scheduled program.

  122. BTW Jim Beam Apple had a lovely smell. Sipped well. Weird aftertaste. After a wee bit of experimentation: JBA with Diet 7 is great. Float a shot of JBA on regular bourbon with Diet 7 is also good.

  123. I know I said I’d be scarce, but Dan is pissed at SiL so I’m not catching as much shit right now.

  124. This is Hotspur’s favorite gif, perhaps of all time.

    http://i.imgur.com/ajPmU.gifv

  125. OMG. I forgot all about that.

    I love you so much cyn that I can’t stand it.

  126. Oso, you into sipping bourbons?

  127. Crown Apple with Cranberry Juice and Ginger Ale is tasty I’m told. Haven’t tried it myself.

  128. While loading piggies on the truck this morning I heard ‘Can you give me a hand with something?’ For one exciting moment I thought I had taught my piggies to use their words.

    Then I realized Cletus had managed to lock himself in one of the compartments on the truck. So disappointing.

  129. Mj, when does the new job start?
    —————————
    I’m not sure. I was going to start the week after next but the current place is trying to keep me with some sort of bonus structure.

    Weird. I’m a total fuck up.

  130. Cyn, I WILL cut you.

  131. “bonus”

  132. Pauli, yes. I prefer bourbon. SYWM

  133. If your current job means no more ghetto bar, tell them to DIAF.

  134. I’d rather work from home, though.

    Hard to bang your mom from the office.

  135. New job means lots of ghetto bar.

  136. ^^ winner winner

  137. Do you still have to live in Charlotte?

  138. NTTAWWT

  139. The only Charlotte I’ve ever known was kind of a fat chick.

  140. I’ve been sampling a few new ones… Bookers rocks. Like your mother.

  141. Hmmm I like Four Roses Single Barrel right now. I’m cheap, so I drink a lot of Evan.

  142. Charlotte. Name of Royal Baby and Gammy Clinton’s grandchild. Breakfast Club’d

  143. Charlotte Bronte.

  144. Just picked up a bottle of the Roses single barrel, as well as a small batch, single barrel Buffalo Trace special issue. Almost picked up a Willett’s until I realized it was $1,000.

    As Bullwinkle calls it, that’s Gesundheit Money — nothing to sneeze at.

  145. HA!

  146. Bucket List: Kentucky Bourbon and TN Whiskey Trails.

  147. Mine: Pappy Van Winkle’s 25yo special reserve. Saw a bottle of it on consignment for $1,900.

  148. CoAlex makes me jelly. I sucked in every art class EVER! Charcoal, pastel, water. I sucked at oil. Only art class I excelled at was chinese brush painting. My Dad was an incredible artist. My sister has a Masters in art, but her art is shit. I like crayons. Mmmm…crayons.

  149. Mmmm, chicken.

    Tastes like alligator.

  150. I don’t drink whiskey because of the taste. I drink it because it causes temporary amnesia.

  151. I know of Pappy. I will never have Pappy. Pappy is a dream.

  152. I like how Pappy has a central place in the Longmire series of books.

  153. Buffalo Trace actually makes PVW. Very common in the distilling world — one company that makes multiple brands.

  154. Hmmm…I’ve had Buffalo Trace.

  155. I’ve had Mare and Cyn.

    So to speak.

  156. I started DuoLingo’s German program. So far it’s coming back really fast.

  157. meh, rip the Valurite label off, print off a Pappy Van Winkles label: instant gift exchange for oso!

  158. I don’t watch British porn because of the sex. I watch it because of the teeth.

  159. Do you have the urge to watch shit-porn and invade the Czechs?

  160. Not really.

  161. Hahaha I’m cheap! I drink Evan and Jim Beam more often than anything else

  162. Evan and Jim have been known to cause temporary amnesia.

  163. Did anybody inadvertently create a monster by giving anybody else a small self-esteem boost today?

  164. I call temporary amnesia “Black outs”

  165. Roamie calls it, “Weekdays… and Weekends”

  166. I have known some women.
    And I have known Jim Beam.
    They both tried to kill me,
    back in 1973.

  167. I call temporary amnesia ‘plausible deniability.’

  168. I really like Jim Beam Kentucky Fire.

  169. Black outs were scaring me. Don’t know if it’s the booze or the Type II

  170. Black outs only scare me if A) I wake up and my wife is sleeping in the other bedroom and won’t tell me why, or B) I’ve got multiple bruises with no explanation, or C) I wake up in jail.

    So far, I’ve avoided C.

  171. B is my common denominator

  172. I had a tour of Buffalo Trace distillery, which included dinner and bourbon tasting. Honestly, I was not impressed with Pappy 18 year old, the Eagle Rare 10 year old was much more better.

  173. There are a lot of great bourbons that, in my opinion, are better than a lot of the PVW releases. But the 25yo, from everything I’ve read and those to whom I’ve talked, put it among the best anywhere.

  174. This, from a guy who used to drink Virginia Gentleman

  175. Eagle Rare 10yo. GTK

  176. I get mean drinking brown liquor.

    Tonight I attended a company outing here:

    http://horseandhunt.com

    I hit 18 of 50 clays at 16 stations with someone elses 12 guage and no practice. I kinda like this place.

  177. Tomorrow I’ll be working from a home in Providence.

  178. That’s “hunt” Mare. Horse and Hunt.

  179. Also my shoulder is a little sore.

  180. Also my shoulder is lady parts are a little sore.

  181. Fixed.

  182. My right knee and my thigh muscles are tight. Laminate flooring day after working 30 cases of new book releases.

  183. My TL is 33. He thinks i’m “Intense”. I had him running in circles today.

  184. Meme revisited

  185. Total loser?

  186. Good work, Puppy.

    Skeet/Trap is a fine way to spend some time.

    I had a bottle of Four Roses a while back, and I liked it a lot. I asked my punch to pick me up another and when I tasted it it was not the same. I suppose the first one was the good’n.

  187. Who’s the new guy?

  188. There are cheap Four Roses bourbons and some very nice ones. Are you sure you had the same one both times?

    Also, I’m heading out to Corona for some extended shooting training. Taking 600 rounds with me. Pray for the sand berms and wood posts.

  189. Four Roses is good. Four Roses single barrel is awesome.

  190. I’m sure they weren’t.

  191. You’d have liked this place chumpo, hundreds of acres of woods and fields, they stock it with pheasant and quail. 50 automated clay throwing machines in different stations and configurations.

  192. Most amazing cocktail I ever had was one called Smoke and Mirrors at the Mandarin Bar at the Mandarin Hotel in Vegas. A variation of the Manhattan with Basil Hayden bourbon (which is very peppery due to its high rye content) and a rinse — a very light wash of Lagavulin 16yo scotch, which is very musky / peaty.

  193. http://is.gd/c6BsQz

  194. Sounds yum. I usually drink Bloodys in Vegas.

  195. For one exciting moment I thought I had taught my piggies to use their words.

    HAHAHAHA! That’s why I lurve Jewstin.

  196. Some pig.

  197. I stocked a book today that recognized the religiosity of A Christmas Carol. Did you guys know it was a story about redemption and mercy? (Kill me nao)

  198. CoAlex makes me jelly. I sucked in every art class EVER! Charcoal, pastel, water. I sucked at oil. Only art class I excelled at was chinese brush painting. My Dad was an incredible artist. My sister has a Masters in art, but her art is shit. I like crayons. Mmmm…crayons.

    Art was my thing. I got to be in a special art class of six, in the 8th grade. Learned a LOT from that teacher. Excelled at all the mediums so much so that the teacher took most of my projects as ‘models’ for other classes. Kinda ticked me off. I would have loved to have kept some.
    Crayons….snorting a box takes me back to kindygarten. It’s one of the best smells EVAR….besides my grandma’s pantry.
    You can do amazing things with crayons and ordinary coloring books.

  199. Did you guys know it was a story about redemption and mercy?

    Yes, actually.

  200. Leon, EVERYONE knows it is a story of redemption and mercy. Why is this book necessary?

  201. For r-tards.

  202. I thought it was a graphic novel.

  203. One of my favorite stories. Love all the filmed versions. This book just pissed me off.

  204. Comment by Colorado Alex on September 15, 2015 8:56 pm
    Do you have the urge to watch shit-porn and invade the Czechs?

    This was directed at Leon.

  205. I’ve only blacked out once. Woke up in the ER strapped to a gurney and ended up with probation for assault and battery. Lost all my college friends.

    I took it as a wake up call to cut back and be more careful.

  206. I stocked a book today that recognized the religiosity of A Christmas Carol. Did you guys know it was a story about redemption and mercy? (Kill me nao)

    Did anyone have their brains immediately go to “A Christmas Story” instead of “A Christmas Carol”?

  207. I can’t tell the difference between a “Sugar” black out and a booze black out. I’m chill right now, but tomorrow…who knows what I’ll remember.

  208. A Christmas Story was based on an entertaining book.

  209. When I was in programming school, there were two classrooms in use.
    We were in the first. Another class, two months ahead, was in the third.
    The second was unused.
    I was walking down the hall at lunch one day and saw this beautiful elaborate mural drawn on the blackboard in classroom 2.
    I had to stop and stare.
    Turns out that Anita had gotten bored at lunch and went crazy on this “Blank Canvas”.
    She is really creative, but mostly manages to suppress it.
    She is an artist, and it shows in her music.
    I think it shows in her code, too…

  210. Do you have the urge to watch shit-porn and invade the Czechs?

    This was directed at Leon.

    No, but I just watched a Zusanna Light exercise video and had some unchaste thoughts about annexing her annex.

  211. AnitaP is great.

  212. Anita is awesome.

  213. No, but I just watched a Zusanna Light exercise video and had some unchaste thoughts about annexing her annex.

    Buy one of those spiked helmets and make your wife learn to speak French.

  214. Her French is pretty much nonexistent at this point.

    Why would I buy another spiked helmet?

  215. Did my spiked helmet kill it?

  216. Hearts of Palm

  217. Paul,
    At University of Virginia, we used to sneak flasks of Virginia Gentleman and add it to the Coke we would get in the a wahoo cups at football games. Half the crowd faced the wrong direction during the game (it interfered with the drinking).

  218. Hi, Tom.

    How was yer summer?

  219. All you got is this moment
    The twenty-first century’s yesterday
    You can derp all you want
    Everybody does yeah that’s okay

  220. There was a “sequel” to “A Christmas Carol” called “Jacob T. Marley” by R. William Bennett. Excellent read.

    HHD is up!

  221. 223


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