Questions for Hillary! Part IX

Morning window lickers. I think we all know that no members of the press will every ask Hillary! a tough question but we can dream, can’t we?

I’ve been thinking of a few that would put her in a slightly uncomfortable position. Especially with her debilitating arthritis.

A few I picked up from some skanky blogs (blogs are the cumdumpsters of the internet) and a few I thought of all by my lonesome.


A 1947 Hillary! Clinton impersonates a human.

1. How many genders are there?  I think leon–skanky ass ho–thought of that one.

2. How many guns should an individual be allowed to own?

3. Can a hate crime be committed against a white male?

4. Should a woman leave a compulsive cheater husband?

5. Is phrenology the study of skull features or the shape and size of Walt’s asshole?

6. What is the capital of Lesbitonia?

7. Should transgender individuals be allowed to use any public restroom?

And so on.


  1. Why do we let candy-bar boy make posts?

  2. Good morning!

  3. I just looked at the stats for this POS blog.

    5 of us do all the posting. Ahem.

  4. Hillary is going to announce this week. This will be exciting.

  5. I would post more, but the very first time I posted, Patty Ann played a nasty trick on me. I’m scarred.

  6. Haha, forget the authors, the search terms to get people here seem to be single minded.

  7. It’s the stompening. I’ve been cisposted.

  8. I do that out of love, Jay.

    Hate filled love.

  9. Nobody likes my posts – not enough gluten in them…..

  10. Ha!

  11. MJ has a point, and I aim to make this right.

    Mare needs to start poating.

  12. 8. What Americans aare you gonna sic the IRS on?

  13. 9. How much of the money one earns should a person be allowed to keep?

  14. 10. Should a Secretary of State continue to tell a tale to the American public, long after they know it to be a lie?

  15. 11. When was the last time you drove? Shopped for groceries? Filled your tank with gas? Paid your own bills? Did your own laundry? Washed your own dishes?

  16. Sacrilege. It comforts me.

    It’s not the sacrilege that comforts me, it’s knowing that those who receive unworthily are basically daring God to find fault in them.

    Sorry, that was an overnight Oso comment I wanted to make I responded to.

  17. Heh. After what MJ said, I took a look at the site stats. Search terms: “big boobs”, “big boob”, “huge boobs”, “your mom sucks dick”, and “i am yours, and you… august ames”. August Ames must have been a BBF model.

  18. 12. Do you think someone so far removed from normal life, like yourself, can connect to the needs of the average American?

  19. 13. Why should voters trust the judgment of a woman who “stands by” a serial philanderer/rapist?

  20. 14. Define feminism.

  21. 16. How do you really feel about Barack Obama? Do you think Michelle is “hot”?

  22. Pi. How many travel office folks will you fire this time?

  23. 15. What’s the sum of all numbers between 1 and 100?

    I’m a dick and think people making decisions that affect me should be able to do math.

  24. Will Bill still collect $125K speaking fees as First Guy?

  25. 17. Which room at the White House is Bill going to use for all of his skankfests?

  26. I can’t believe that fat, assface showed up last night and I was busy watching Castle reruns.

  27. 17. Which room at the White House is Bill going to use for all of his skankfests?

    18. What donation level is required to get on the entry list for that room?

  28. Comment by Teresa in Fort Worth, TX on April 7, 2015 8:58 am
    Nobody likes my posts – not enough gluten in them…..



  29. 19. Which Obama redecorating disaster in the White House will you undo first?

  30. Cyn definitely does the heavy lifting around here.

    I thought my role around here was to say lots of stupid stuff early and often.

  31. 21. How clenched was your sphincter when you stood in front of the Benghazi families and lied to their faces?

  32. 22. Have YOU seen Anthony’s Weiner?

  33. I thought my role around here was to say lots of stupid stuff early and often.

    Yes, THIS! And my job is to … umh ….

    … attract more converts to the cult of crossfit. I’m WAY under my quota right now.

  34. 23. Do you have a reflection?

  35. 23. Give me your thoughts on Clamato. And clam dip.

  36. 25. Miracle whip or Mayo?

  37. I’ve been really busy the last week. Can someone summarize the Hugo thing for me?

  38. 24. In this “Village” you speak of is there a role for religious people to home school their children so they won’t be forced to learn how to put a condom on a banana in 4th grade?

  39. 26. Wienerschnitzel or Arby’s?

  40. Arby’s is non-conservative friendly, so they don’t get my dollars. i don’t care if they have gyros now.

  41. The Hugo’s used to give awards only to social justice warriors, some people called them on it, now they gave awards to other authors, and the people in charge are blaming an internet list.

  42. 22. Have YOU seen Anthony’s Weiner?

    How is Huma in bed?

  43. Huh.

  44. 27. Do you use long strokes or back and forth motions….when painting a fence?

  45. Dotting the i, or crossing the t?

  46. 28. Do you use that “reset” button during sex with Bill?

  47. Paint house side-side, paint fence up-down.

  48. 6. What is the capital of Lesbitonia?
    Isn’t that the the nation Groucho Marx leads in “Duck Soup?” Or was that “Dick Soup?”

  49. Jay, excellent summary. I may steal it.

  50. 29. When Bill flew to Pedo Island with Jeffry Epstein did you pack him a lunch?

  51. I’m sure you can polish it up a bit, roamy.

  52. In the hugo deal they also accused the listers of being misogynist and racist, until the dopes read the list and noted there were plenty of women and “people of color” on it.

  53. As Vox Day is fond of noting, he’s a Native American (per 23andme) and hispanic, and lives full-time in Italy.

  54. 23. Give me your thoughts on Clamato. And clam dip.
    Is there a clam dip candy bar?

  55. 30. Who is more to blame for Chelsea’s looks, you or Bill?

  56. I have a bulls-eye shaped rash on my back for the second time in as many months. Can I get on disability for Lyme Disease? I can pass for Puerto Rican.

  57. Are any of you dolts able to visit Hate House blog to see New Messico? I can’t tell if the Google invites are working any longer.

  58. What is this hate house blog you speak of?

  59. I saw it, gimlet boy

  60. That blog where I posted landscaping progress on the Hate House where I’m buried. You haven’t seen it?

    Thx J’ames. If you could stil get in then it must be working.

  61. Evidently nobody told me about it.

  62. It figures. You all suck anyway.

  63. Do I have your e-mail? I have a bunch of you guys’ addresses but I do know who is who. Hint me what it looks like, HS.

  64. What I mean is I don’t want you to have to post it here in the open.

  65. hot_spur at me (and your mom) dot cum

  66. Check your pee mail, HS

  67. Got it. Thx.

  68. Hahahahaha

    Why am I only just now finding out about this?

    “Giant fucking pile of dirt”


  69. George, can you send me the invite?

    mare@presidentwhofiredairtrafficcontrolers dot com

  70. George, my email has 930 in it.

  71. Roamy, you should be able to get in, you’re already on the list

  72. @presidentwhofiredairtrafficcontrolers dot com



  73. I like mare’s spam defeater.

  74. Try yer pee mail Mare

  75. I had your website bookmarked on the now dead computer.

  76. So I’m on the list but I don’t remember where to go.

  77. thegimleteyeball dot blogspot dot communist

  78. Woot! thanks

  79. Hotspur, how old is a house that still has 2-prong outlets?

  80. hahahahah

    George’s captions are hilarious.

    For a house of hate, I’m thinking house of zen.

  81. Not as old as Hotspur.

  82. The atrium looks different now, Mare. Added a bunch of loropetalum chinensis among the asparagus ferns.
    /gardening blog

  83. George, have you posted pics of the house as it is now?

    I’m still enjoying the artsy pics and their captions.

  84. loropetalum chinensis

    WTF kind of weed is that, Carl Spackler?

  85. My sister has one of those stones with a bored hole. It makes just the right sound of water moving. Hers is tall and slatey looking…pacific northwest looking.

  86. Maybe today I’ll post some pix of the changes to the flora. The front has filled in nicely.

  87. Even the dyckia has shoved its botanical genitalia into the open. It’s like a plant sex farm out there.

  88. George you must. Our curiosity on the improvements will cause all kinds of trouble until it’s slaked.

  89. Approximately 1965 in new construction and remodeling.

  90. We had to put in a new 200 amp panel although the wiring had been upgraded to three prong. There was an ancient 80 amp pushmatic fireworks board in there.

  91. Make sure to post concrete pictures. And gutters, for eddiebear.

  92. The concrete hasn’t changed, still looks as good as when we poured it.

  93. make sure you head over to the mothership. Drew has a Rand post up.

  94. Also, if you haven’t read this about Sad Puppies, then this is a good wrap-up (from the right side).

  95. You should fill the pool with Skittles.

  96. Is a pool full of Skittles like a ball pit for you, MJ?

  97. I like a slurry of Skittles and watermelon soda, studded with Swisher Sweets. Then you play dunk-the-white-cop.

  98. When I see a Drew post, I know to just skip it.

  99. The house I rented in Tulsa had 3-prong outlets in the kitchen, part of the living room that shared a wall with it, and what was probably an addition of master bath. Everywhere else was 2-prong. Same thing as to whether light switches were up/down or left/right. The outside was the same design as one of the neighborhoods here built in 1958. I wish I’d taken some pictures because there was some weirdness. The threshold between the master bedroom and bath had an air vent. Nothing like stepping on a grate in the middle of the night while stumbling to the potty. One kitchen cabinet drawer could only be opened if the oven door was open, otherwise it bumped into the handle.

  100. Reading Instapundit this AM has made me all hatey. Much vexatious news.

  101. Since Apple rakes in boatloads of cash from nations that behead gays, why isn’t Apple the Chik-Fil-A of tech for proggies?

    Oh, yes… Proggies.

  102. Obama, the noted Christian. Riiiight.

    “On Easter, I do reflect on the fact that as a Christian, I’m supposed to love, and I have to say that sometimes when I listen to less-than-loving expressions by Christians, I get concerned,” the president said to a gathering of Christian leaders. “But that’s a topic for another day.”

    Obama loves only Obama.

  103. Man, this guy’s brain pan is thinner than a Swedish pancake.

    Embattled news anchor Brian Williams couldn’t bring himself to admit he lied about coming under fire on a chopper in Iraq — so he instead wondered aloud if he had a brain tumor, a new report claims.

    Embattled. As if this weren’t all his own fault.

  104. Brian doesn’t have a brain tumor any more, he removed it himself, with a pocketknife and a makeup compact mirror.

    It’s in his book. Google it!

  105. Williams actually thinks he can make a comeback. He might be right given the mendacity of the MFM.

  106. I have no doubt he’ll be back. He’ll probably moderate a presidential debate. Crowley is gone, after all.

  107. Oh Gawd. And the GOP will submit to it.

    Behold. One is a fictional character in animal costume and the other is the Easter Bunny.

  109. When I see a Drew post, I know to just skip it.

    One doesn’t need to get any further than his declarations for Rand. Full. Stop.

  110. I look forward to seeing the Paul “compound” at the Iowa Straw Poll. His dad had quite the setup.

  111. Obama doesn’t know what Easter is or why it has that name. He just knows it’s a church thing.

  112. Ahh…memories. Tim Pawlenty, Herman Caine, Thadeus Mcotter.

    Why do so many crazy people like Luap? I don’t get the attraction.

  113. One is a fictional character in animal costume and the other is the Easter Bunny.

    It’s Biden.

  114. Okay idiots, more pix of plants and shit at Hate House blog up now

  115. I took the picture to mean that Obama was into Furries.

  116. When I moved into this house there were no outlets in the bathrooms, and only one three pronged outlet in the kitchen.

  117. Rush was just talking about Drew.

  118. When I moved into this house there were no outlets in the bathrooms, and only one three pronged outlet in the kitchen.

    Are you sure you didn’t move into a garden shed?

  119. Was there a hole in the bathroom floor and a crescent moon in the door, too?

  120. I think I found out why Pupster’s fitness routine isn’t doing the trick:

  121. Eric,
    I don’t to be able to see your blog.

  122. George,

    Could you add me? email ramon dot williamson dot ii @gmail thingy (no spaces)


  123. fixt, tomswifty
    chrispy, I don’t seem to know your e-mail, I have to put it into blogger to get you permission

  124. I took the picture to mean that Obama was into Furries.

    Furry Acceptance is what comes next after trannies. Just watch.

  125. TrannyPolypony rights!

  126. GO.
    it is cplasch at eskimo dot-thing communist.

  127. Thing 1 and Thing 2

  128. Wow, George! You must write for a living! Your blog writing is so succinct and full of f*ckin; HATE!

    Tip o’ me hat to ye, sir!

  129. Well, I’m going to go barf my brains out.

    Anyone want to guess why?

  130. Job offer as Buffet’s personal Muppet?

  131. It was Jimmy’s, not Warren’s company you were interviewing with?

  132. fixt, chrispy

  133. Well, I’m going to go barf my brains out.
    Anyone want to guess why?

    Carb-loading on Charleston Chews is never a good idea.

  134. It was Jimmy’s, not Warren’s company you were interviewing with?


    I thought it was HomeTown Buffet???

  135. Or Golden Corral.

    Pro tip: Golden Corral is a cafeteria, not a whorehouse in Nevada.

  136. I thought MJ was talking to Biden today. I was gonna guess broccoli caught in his teeth.

  137. Anyone want to guess why?

    You lost the inability to smell your own body odor?

  138. Muppets smell like hand and fear.

  139. GND came to her senses?

  140. Did any of you see Rand Paul’s Presidential kick off speech?

    If you close your eyes, and forget his dad is insane and Rand has said weird shit too, you would love this candidate…based on his speech today.

  141. Your new company wants you to focus on diversity and white privilege?

    Because that would make me want to barf.

  142. All good guesses, but incorrect.

  143. Maybe MJ just watched a Russell Brand movie.

  144. I was on a treadmill at the gym listening but didn’t hear all of it, but what I did hear was very much about appealing to conservatives.

  145. Or a hillary! cover video of a Katy Perry song.


  146. Well, MJ, what makes you want to barf your brains out?

  147. Anatomically, where is the brain located in a candy bar? In the nougat, the nuts or the delicious chocolate shell?

  148. Well, we know the big brain isn’t in the nuts, so we can rule that out.

  149. Our long national nightmare is over

    Somebody go hide Cyn’s pills.

  150. John McCain is a colossal asshole.

    Go the f*ck away you moldering POS.

  151. He will be 80 by Election Day, but he said his Senate career is “just getting started.”

    Holy shit, he’s arrogant and is one of those pricks that think, “They need me!”


    I don’t respect this man at all and I don’t give a shit (anymore) about his POW status 45 years ago.

  152. Oh, and don’t let the door hit your ass as you escort your dumb, fat boobed daughter and imbecile wife.


    *And has anyone seen my pills?*

  154. Fat boobed. Hahahahahahahaha.

  155. Oh sour Jeebus on kaiser roll. McCain will probably run from the grave and as a Dem.

  156. Say what you will about Rand Paul (and you’d be right) in his speech today he talked about term limits and he’s absolutely, fukatively right.

  157. I need to go look at some kittens.

  158. GO,
    I don’t know where in NM you were, but it seems to be a vital and thriving community.
    Anita & I have been pondering where to live out our remaining days. Thanks for helping…



    And he’s smart. Love it.

  161. Oh, and he’s Christian which I’m sure lots of people will hate.

  162. It would have been too easy to show the cool parts of NM. Besides there’s lots of urban squalor in Klownifornia so I posted the rural variety.

  163. gah!

    Does anyone know how to port both the input and output to a bat or bash script? tee will get the output, but I need the input too, for logging/debugging.

  164. Mom, J’ames is having a stroke and typing gibberish!

  165. What’s got ya upchuckin’, MJ?

  166. You could cat the $1 and $2 and so forth to your log file from inside the script.

  167. Is is shameful that I had to google Leon’s question about the sum of 1 to 100, and learned of Gass’ equation?


  168. *barfs again.

  169. Comment by tomswifty on April 7, 2015 2:16 pm

    GND came to her senses?

    He drunkenly proposed and she said “yes”?

  170. Is is shameful that I had to google Leon’s question about the sum of 1 to 100, and learned of Gass’ equation?


  171. I want to log the output when I run it, leon, hence the tee. I can’t change every script.

  172. this is my bat script (inputtest.bat)

    set /p inputvar=What is the input?
    echo inputvar=%inputvar%

    I run it using:
    ./inputtest.bat | tee inputtest..txt

    the output (inputtest.txt doesn’t echo the user input for the set /p line.

  173. I get the same output, whether I use Powershell, cmd, or cygwin

  174. *lies down on floor, spasming from the stroke

  175. I think I see your problem, Jay.

  176. Nerd blog!

  177. I don’t use DOS much, but don’t you want a “>” rather than a “|”?

  178. the tee goes to a file, and the screen

    this is replacing mainframe JCL, so I know it’s odd.

  179. If you run it without, does the script throw anything to stdout?

  180. without the tee, it goes to the screen, and the file

    I don’t need the tee, I guess

  181. WTF does MJ want to barf?

  182. I can’t tell if J’ames and Leon are talking about scripting or cricket.

  183. I spent most of my day writing a script to hit something until it dies so I can test a resource problem, so I’m talking scripting.

    Which I hate.

  184. Yes

  185. Care for a spot of tea, before I bowl at the wicket?

  186. There goes my fantasy that Leon is a key player for the West Indies cricket club.

  187. I had to write a communication from the president of the company threatening to fire people.

    Write your own dickface memos, dickface. I don’t believe in that style of management. It’s sooooo counterproductive. All you do is incentivize people to cut corners.

    These guys are fucking idiots. I’m a felt puppet and I’m know better.

  188. That’s some serious suckage.

  189. So that was the reason you needed to barf?

  190. Hence the reason you are looking at other companies?

  191. There goes my fantasy that Leon is a key player for the West Indies cricket club.

    I can’t imagine I’d hate that, but it sadly is not so.

  192. MJ, the other reason that’s done is to encourage anyone thinking of leaving to do so. Quitters cost less than layoffs.

  193. So no one has the balls to smash that Edward Snowden sculpture in NYC?

    It’s not like it was sanctioned by the city. Urinate on the stupid thing.

  194. You know what pisses me off? The lefties were right about one thing, infiltrate the schools, dumb down the kids and you’ve got lefties for life or for a very long time.

  195. So that was the reason you needed to barf?
    Oh! no.

    It was the 9 martinis I had for lunch.

  196. Hence the reason you are looking at other companies?

  197. MJ, the other reason that’s done is to encourage anyone thinking of leaving to do so. Quitters cost less than layoffs.
    Yeah, but we turn over so many people that it’s a serious problem.

    Our key management positions have a 30% turnover rate every year.

    I wonder why there’s no growth?

  198. Growth doesn’t matter, only the stock price. This quarter.

  199. Try this month or today.

    If there’s no growth the stock price is going to plummet. We’re 18x which is 3x higher than our nearest in the peer group.

    We’ve been downgraded recently from buy to hold.

    My exit might be perfect timing although it was just coincidence.

    Meeting for panel interviews on Friday and lunch with the potential new boss.

  200. My exit might be perfect timing although it was just coincidence.

    You wanted out for a reason. It’s harder to leave when you have a sense that things are going well.

  201. Kick ass and take names, MJ.

    Also, do not order the spinach salad.

  202. I just ate a spinach salad.

  203. Hahahahahaha


    You can’t make this shit up.

  204. Save that stamp! In a hundred years it will be the new Penny Black or Inverted Jenny.

  205. In a hundred years it will be the new Penny Black

    You’re racist.

  206. I thought electing Obama twice took care of all the racism?

  207. Yeah, wasn’t Obama’s amazing girth of personality and holiness going to make everyone like everyone else, like the Jews and Palistinians?

  208. I’m certain in a couple of years when I BING the term “failure” 1 million articles about Obama will show up.

  209. I heard Hill’s DotS segment from Saturday.



    this shit doesn’t make sense – shouldn’t they have just asked oblahblah for the information… maybe they were just bored and wanted to play with the dead mouse that is U.S. interest(s) and security…

    this whole thing is playing out like the story where the bad tempered, short, scrawny dude, that always had his shit handed to him because he was an asshole, but now finds himself able to bitch slap, ass rape, nut punch, stinky pinky with a dirty sanchez finale, the friendly, smart, sponsor of wealth and enlightenment guy because Mr. Good Guy got fat, drunk, and lazy and forgot that evil really does exist in this world –

    or maybe we just elected an anti-freedom scumbag racist punk with delusions of greatness.

    but then again: what difference at this time does it make?

  211. I’m certain in a couple of years when I BING the term “failure” 1 million articles about Obama will show up.

    Why not 1,000,001?


  213. “I thought electing Obama twice took care of all the racism?”

    there you go again thinking like a white privileged cape wearing skull thing…

  214. MCPO?

  215. Wow, GO, your NM pics look like home.

  216. I chose only the bestest parts of New Messico, Oso.

  217. Osoface. Who’s going to win?

  218. Palm Desert Life.

    Got stuck behind three cars going 40 in the 50mph zone.

    A Maserati, a Porsche, and a McLaren.

    Fucking q-tips.

  219. Got stuck behind three cars going 40 in the 50mph zone.

    Hotspur can drive three cars at once?

  220. My grandparents fruit stand wasn’t that fancy. It’s gone now. I haven’t had a Dandy Burger in years.

  221. MJ, which game? Chick basketball? Baseball? 2016 election?

  222. xbradtc stop rubbing your lifestyles of the rich and famous in our faces.


  223. Mare, I was driving a 97 Jeep Grand Cherokee. Maserati and Porsche are pretty common here, but that was the first McLaren I’ve ever seen. Sorry no pics. Can’t film and drive.

  224. MJ, which game? Chick basketball? Baseball? 2016 election?

  225. McLaren?

    Too awesome.

  226. McLaren?

    That’s my Wednesday ride.

  227. Huh. That Don Quixote distillery in the last photo of NM sells blue corn bourbon. Might be interesting.

  228. I was very disapointed it didn’t contain a bikini clad Demi Moore.

  229. Stuck behind a McRetum, again?!!

  230. MJ’s Wednesday Muppet ride.

  231. Cyn?


    MJ XBrad

    in their yoot.

  233. Cyn,

    What’s his first name?

  234. does anyone care to go for a ride in my brand new

  235. Ha Ha! Zzzz-ing!

  236. Cyn,
    What’s his first name?

    Ask your mom.

  237. First name?? Aww crap. I was supposed to get that, huh.

  238. Bwahahahahaha!

    ^^^ May be NSFW ^^^

  239. Cards/Cubs game cancelled because Chicago sucks.

    Finally finished building my first computer from random pieces.

    The OS is installing now. Evidently this is a long process.

    Listening to to the Blues game.

  240. does anyone care to go for a ride in my brand new

    GAH! A Reliant Robin. I think Jeremy Clarkson capsized that thing a half dozen times when it was on Top Gear.

  241. in their yoot.

    Looks like the Young brothers from AC/DC.

  242. Hey, it’s a job.

  243. does anyone care to go for a ride in my brand new

    Krikey! Is that a trike?

  244. Yep, a three-wheeled British car.

    Hey, they like bad teeth, sodomy and surrendering to Muslims. What do you expect.

  245. Turned off Hockey.

    Got some old Husker Du on the playlist.

  246. Watching last night’s Better Call Saul.

  247. Good evening. Prepare for a rant.

  248. No.

  249. British B-movie scream queens aren’t half as attractive as the women doing the same jobs here in the states.

    It’s like there’s nothing left there worth saving.

  250. A Robin!!!!

    What a POS.

  251. That was for George.

    Rant-away, P.

  252. Did anybody figure it was a bad sign that anybody else was asking if meth could show up on a breathalyzer today?

  253. Who the fuck is P? And how many bullwhips shoved up his ass?

  254. OMG Jimmy just went on a rant about NM that ties in perfectly with GOs pics.

  255. Hands up don’t poop.

  256. I’m always hearing “no” from people.

  257. No means yes

  258. 8 Milies High by Husker Du.

    My new computer install is not going well.

    In an old school punk mode.


  259. Husker Du was awesome.

  260. Don’t make me start linking old school Britney Spears and Katy Perry.

  261. Between Hüsker Dü, Sugar, solo stuff and a compilation I’ve got a lot of Bob Mould music. Thanks for the reminder Phat. Now I have to find it…

  262. Quick, someone post some One Tree Hill videos. Xbrad will be… busy… for hours.

  263. Hey, there was some excellent music on OTH.


  265. I went to an auction last night and bought about $75 worth of crap.

    I got 160 items that have an average retail price of $6-$7.

    I don’t know how long it will take to sell, but it’s not bad for my first day.

  266. *votes to put Scott on Storage Wars*

  267. If any of you need furniture, or jewelry, find an auction place near you.

    Big beautiful pieces of furniture go for about $100. The auctioneer started really nice armoire at $1000 and had to walk it all the way down to $50 to get a bid. It sold for $100.

    10 years ago it would have easily fetched $1000 from a small crowd.

    I saw a nice antique 4 post bed go for $10.

    Used jewelry is dirt cheap too.

  268. I am going back next week.

    Safety deposit boxes!


    I’ll be Son.

  270. Sorry, old chaps and chappettes. “P’ a while ago was my piece of shit, no-count, low-rent, fagpizza loving Iphone poating without bothering to log in to weirdpuss which it has to do every fucking time I try to check in with you homos because it’s too busy bashing flyover honkies to stay logged in.

    But that’s not why I wanted to rant. But before I do, the answer to hotspur’s question is four score and seven.

    So here’s my rant: I’m a hard motherfucker to piss off. It’s one of my bigger faults and has hurt me careerwise for 30+ years if you believe that whole “nice guys finish last” bullshit. And I do.

    But one way to really piss me off is for me get caught in line at a convenience store while some low-life, cocksucking, scumbag of a scrunt has her whole handful of lottery tickets checked by the scanner to see if she has any winners because she’s too fucking stupid to just scratch off the paint and do the fucking math and see if she won or not. And then she takes her winners and trade them in for more scratch offs instead of money and takes her sweet goddamn time picking which ones she wants because there’s a whole system to this picking winning lottery tickets shit evidently. Meanwhile my fucking coffee is getting cold, my fucking breafast burrito is getting cold, and the appt I’m late for is checking his fucking watch and wondering whether to text me to check on why I’m late or not.

    It happened this morning. After about 10 minutes, I shit you not, I finally blurted out pretty loudly, “Are you fucking people interested in selling anything else besides fucking lottery tickets today?” Evidently the scrunt and the underclass mornette working the register were deaf but I got knowing nods from the rest of the hands in line who were late for work. Anybody need a slightly used bullwhip?

    /rant the fuck off/

  271. I’m going out to mail some checks to y’alls moms. Need me to pick up anything besides lottery tickets while I’m out?

  272. Pendejo, I feel your pain, and If I was working that store I’d give you that burrito and coffee for free.

    As long as you would be willing to date me on Saturday.

  273. Hold onto your hats, we’re going to relive Ferguson, and this time there’s already a cop charged with murder. Looks justified, but now it will be “See?!? Ferguson was for reals, whitey!”

  274. Pro tip:

    Don’t become a cop

  275. NBC Nightly News with Leper Hopes was shameful in their reporting, calling this current killing part of a pattern of police-involved shootings like Ferguson. As if the whole bogus narrative of Ferguson were true despite Obastard’s own DoJ stating only days ago that there was no there there.

  276. Leper Hopes can spread lies with the ease of Brian Williams, so he’ll probably keep the job.

  277. Because black. Light black, but still black.

  278. Oh, and my $7 knife? It kicks ass.

    Today is full of win.

  279. What is a more honest narrative?

    Cops killing innocent black kids……….or

    Black kids committing crimes.

  280. We had 2 cops charged with murder for killing a homeless guy. We were already under a DoJ BS dealio. Our cops are “Trigger” happy. IDFC. Friend killed an 18 yr old coming at him with a knife. He finally just left the sheriff’s dept. Cop on base.

  281. Scott I clicked that knife link and was so tempted to buy it. But I didn’t want to cut under you.

    How can they sell that for $6.99?

  282. Your mom got hassled today by some whitey who didn’t want to wait to pay for his coffee.

  283. Per the NYT, Mr. Scott apparently ran because he’s late on his child support payments. Which now carries the death penalty, I see.

  284. But Sally Kohn was quick to explain yesterday that laws don’t involve force.

  285. Scott, we have Members that buy our cancelled items and last ones. At Target, we had people that would come in and shop clearance. Every single morning. Steeler guy doesn’t have a job/job. All ebay all day long. Dan and I ran into him at Disneyland one year.

  286. Mare, it’s heavy, well constructed, sharp as heck, and I can open it with one hand in about .2 seconds.

    It’s probably radioactive or something, still the best $7 I ever spent.

  287. Pretty sure and have auction listings on items.

  288. GO, I work retail and I want to yell at time wasting assholes. A good cashier takes care of the line. There is an asshole that we call “The Whistler” that needs to be prompted to move along quite frequently.

  289. Whenever you’re feeling low, it’s always good to get some perspective, realize things could be worse, and have some empathy for folks with real problems.

    The day before he put a gun to his head and killed himself at an M Resort buffet on Easter, a Las Vegas man filled a box with his complaints against the resort and its employees and mailed it to the Las Vegas Review-Journal.

    In his final, angry message to the world, delivered to the newspaper Monday morning, John Noble blamed his suicide on depression that set in after the Henderson resort awarded him free meals at the buffet for life then banned him from the property in 2013 for harassing some of the women working there.

  290. for the best auction listings evar.

  291. I got in trouble at Target for asking a kid to sit down in a shopping cart. It was Sofa King. This past weekend at Sam’s, we had Members put their kids in the trampoline display, the playhouse display, and on the freaking swingset. Associates are getting fired for stepping on the steel, and we have Members placing their children in displays 5ft off the ground. I’m in the Darwin Camp, but that won’t get me my Sam’s Share.

  292. I cannot believe that your Risk Retention people aren’t having strokes about that policy.

  293. Cyn, we didn’t get any Sam’s Share last year, due to $$$ accidents. This year, the focus is on safety. Long term associates have been losing their jobs. Sam’s doesn’t seem to have an issue with associates chatting up safety with Members. And by chatting up, I mean PTSD Alan yelling across the Club to “Get your kid off of there”

  294. Meh – let the Darwin Nominees goof around. That’s one less lefty vote, right?

  295. Yep. I’m totes in favor of taking warning labels off of everything. Why is it called “Common Sense” when it really isn’t common at all?

  296. You wont know that zipper wax is an eye irritant.

    We can’t have that.

  297. Scott, I H8 everyone and everything!!! (Watching Dodgers/Pad Squad.)

  298. At least the Cubs won’t lose today.

  299. Who is getting home delivery?
    Your Mom.

  300. Zipper wax could be an ear irritant.

    We may never know.

  301. I need to go to bed.

    Fuck Zipper Wax.!

    Don’t put it in your eye.

  302. G’night, Scott.

  303. GO, guys I work with talk about how horrible Santa Fe zoning is. Some buildings can’t be torn down or fixed. Locals used to yell horrible things at us. Dan: We’re from ABQ! Locals: Never mind, brah!

  304. Checking duckweed iPhone.

  305. Apple: making money off of nations that behead gays while Tim Cook comes out of the closet in safe Cupertino.

  306. I sleep maybe 4 hrs a night. I prefer the couch. If I go to the family bed, Dan knows it is business time. Dan and both Divas snore. I snore when I have allergies. I also have night terrors, I sleep walk and talk, and sometimes I get physical in my sleep. Dan is Desi to my Lucy.

  307. I guess Santa Fe is NM’s Austin.

  308. CPAP dachshund masks stat!

  309. What’s the difference between MJ sucking on a bull’s dick and a baboon shoving a giant prosthetic leg up MJ’s ass?

  310. GO, yes. Taos is hippie central. Albuquerque’s North Valley is Lesbaru central. I think of NM as Hawaii without ocean. Locals really H8 outsiders, but are dependent upon them. I get pretty good Indian art in SF. I collect Zuni bear fetishes.

  311. Rosetta, no math!!!

  312. What’s the difference between MJ sucking on a bull’s dick and a baboon shoving a giant prosthetic leg up MJ’s ass?

    I was told there would be no math.

  313. Damn you, Oso.

  314. GO, you guys need to be in SF for either Indian or Spanish Art Weeks. Lots of great deals.

  315. What’s the difference between MJ sucking on a bull’s dick and a baboon shoving a giant prosthetic leg up MJ’s ass?

    I suspect this is some subtle zen koan, like “What is the sound of one hand clapping?” To answer is to misunderstand the question.

    Or maybe it’s just one is sodomy and the other is osculation.

  316. I can’t believe McCain is running for re-election. Hey dick, you’re fucking 80. Go spend time with your great-great-great-grandkids.

    It would be funny if a tea party group primaried McCain with some guy that was 95 years old.

    Actually a debate between McCain and 6 or 7 other candidates all older than him would be hilarious.


  317. Fucking GOPe has been purging AZ GOPe of Tea Party types. McCain with the $$$.

  318. 80 is pretty young for the Valley of the Sun. Fucking Crypt Keepers.

  319. I suspect this is some subtle zen koan, like “What is the sound of one hand clapping?” To answer is to misunderstand the question.

    Well done. Only the infinite universe knows why MJ sucks on bull dick.

  320. I can’t believe McCain is running for re-election. Hey dick, you’re fucking 80. Go spend time with your great-great-great-grandkids.

    Maybe he has been sampling too much of his wife’s beer holdings.

  321. I would vote for the Mexican Commie before I would vote for McCain. (Pretty sure that any opponent would be Messican)

  322. I would vote for brain damaged Giffords before I would vote for Juan. Pa;in is the only reason I voted for him in ’08 when I knew TFG was the BBALI anti-Christ.

  323. Maybe McCain is trying to beat Strom Thurmond’s record. Maybe that should be the GOP’s ticket.

    McCain – Thurmond 2016
    “Nearly dead, at rest and ready”

  324. Dude, we’re all in for SMOD 2016.

  325. Maria Conchita Alonso follows me on twitter. I got sucked into some Venezuelan groups. I don’t even speak Spanish! I don’t care if you don’t have toilet paper!

  326. I kinda mean this as a serious question. Don’t McCain and Lindsey Graham seem to like each other a little too much?

    What’s going on there? Something seems askew.

  327. Ok, losers. Favorite ballpark and why? I like the Trop. AC and live Rays. I don’t want to talk about the beer cup sized roach.

  328. Rosie, they are a little too “Senatorial” IYKWIMAITTYD.

  329. Does she really? I’ve always kinda had the hots for her.

  330. I <3 Rand and Ted. Shake it up!

  331. “Askew.” Is that what the kids are calling it now? Used to be we just called them “fruits.”

  332. That coment is about MCA following you onTwitchNutz….

  333. She hates commies. And animal abuse. She is a great twitter follow.

  334. Time for sleepy for me.

    G’night owls.

  335. Venezuela is on the ropes. Communism sucks. They are losing out on oil prices due to fracking. (THX TJ) Making deals with Iran and China. TFG is golfing and we are at risk.

  336. Favorite ballpark now? The K (only one I frequent but it rocks). Why? Natural grass, great views from everywhere, best ballpark food anywhere and lots of interesting diversions if one is so inclined. Favorite ball park old school? Crosley Field. “Cause it was old and rickety and smelled of beer, cigars and sweat.

  337. Hi Rosie!
    Damn I am too late!

  338. I think I am in the bucket,
    Let me check.

  339. I always wanted to go to the K. Fountains. TV. Still turf. It was awesome. George Brett. Seventh Inning Stretch: UGH. Shirtless banjo folk stood up and the sound of sunflower seeds hitting concrete freaked me out

  340. nope not in the bucket, it just went to the aether.

  341. I think I saw you in an ice-cream parlor,
    Drinking milk shakes cold and long
    Smiling and waving and looking so derp,
    Don’t think you knew you were in this song

  342. Dear Rosetta,

    We’re sorry to inform you that your recent claim has been rejected based on the grounds that no one, not even Hotspur’s mom, can fit two bowling balls into their anal cavity.

    And furthermore, the rationale you stated for your emergency room visit, “I totes was dared to stretch my bum after talking to myself in the mirror and drinking a gallon of zipper wax,” makes no logical sense.


    Farmers Insurance Group

  343. Bum ba-bum ba bum bum bum.

  344. Gym time.


  346. Heh. That’s funny.

  347. It’s raining.

    No run for me.

  348. OK, it might not be raining but the ground looks wet.

  349. Wakeywakey. Raining here too. No running, for at least another week. I was gonna go to 9 am crackfat, but my stupid dog kept me up for 3 hours last night being weird, and I’m tired and sore.

    Where’s that waitress with the coffee?

  350. I had to towel off my kittah. She must not have known what that wet stuff falling from the sky was.

  351. Every episode of Sanford and Son is available on YouTube.

    You’re welcome.

  352. towel off my kittah

  353. The Cubs have solved their Wrigley restroom problem!

    Holy poor planning, Batman! (Or should I say, Bartman?)

  354. This is perhaps the greatest thing ever.

  355. Wrigley restroom problem?


  356. Demond WIlson is the 2nd greatest actor of all time.

  357. Who is the first?

  358. Matt “Guitar” Murphy

  359. He was pretty good at other stuff too.

  360. We should make Car in listen to blues for a day, just to see what happens.


  361. I don’t see that ending well.

    On Sunday at the OBrien household we had a 2 hour discussion regarding music quality and rap. I finally had to walk away to go work out.

    I don’t know what I did wrong? Hopefully it’s just a phase.

  362. Comment by Jay in Ames on April 8, 2015 8:33 am

    The Cubs have solved their Wrigley restroom problem!
    Has your Mom solved her Wrigley restroom problem?

  363. Matt “Guitar” Murphy
    Well that basically made my day. I had forgotten how much I love that movie and that scene.

    Orange whip?

  364. *nods*

  365. The Cubs should hire your Mom. She knows how to please long lines of guys……………

  366. Back from the gym. Slept on the couch last night and had almost no gas today.

  367. I skipped the gym today. Stupid dog.

  368. I’ve been up since 2am. I made it.

    I am also the fattest I’ve been in years. It’s kind of funny.

  369. You testing GND’s love for you, MJ?

  370. Carin would like blues. It’s the basis for the best songs.

  371. I got fatter in the months I took away from the gym to recuperate my shoulder. Not fun.

    MJ needs a new job that lets him stay home sometimes.

  372. I should know by next week.

    Travel is only about 10%, international. I can do that.

  373. Matt “Guitar” Murphy was born in 1929.

    I had no idea.

  374. I’m supposed to be 20-25% travel, but it’s event driven.

    I’ve gone about 2 months without an event. This pleases me. I also get to take June/July/August off the travel table.

  375. For Blues, you almost can’t beat Muddy.

  376. what happened to HHD? Car in needs to step up.

  377. Me? ME?

    Why not Mare?

  378. I never heard from Ford. I had some sidebar talks with my friend on the inside that might have disinclined them, or they may have had some other candidates with some real robotics/sensors experience.

  379. I’ll do it if I have to. Someone with faster internet check to see if anyone is working on it.

  380. mare? Why not have MJ do it?


  381. No new poats, Car in, you’re up!

  382. I also might have asked for too much money.

  383. A University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee teaching assistant is offering extra credit to his students—but only if they’re bisexual.

    In an email sent by Jonathan Dellinger to students enrolled in his public speaking class on April 1, the TA promised three extra credit points to any of his students who were bisexual.

    Perfect time for Rosetta to go back to school!

  384. *claims to be bisexual but resisting gay urges/just haven’t met right guy*
    *sues professor for withdrawing offer*

  385. I just dumped 50 lbs of carrots in the woods.

    Deer Christmas.

  386. Within the next decade NAMBLA will become a respectable victim group in blue cities.

  387. If someone opposes this scheme of extra points for bisexuals, they would be accused of discrimination.

  388. WTF were you doing with 50 pounds of carrots?

  389. Should have smoked them.

  390. Possum Passover

  391. I think in place of extra points for bisexuals he might offer special adhesive snowflake stickers.

  392. Woodchuck Hanukkah

  393. Porcupine Kwanzaa

  394. Ferret Festivus

  395. Heh, affirmative action for LGBT!

  396. Most people prefer smoking sausage. Literally or otherwise.

  397. Caribou Hullabaloo

  398. Beaver Lollapalooza

  399. Male bisexuals are how women get AIDS. Clearly, that deserves an award.

  400. It’s horrily unfair that HIV strikes mainly gay men and IV drug users. Everyone should have it equally.

  401. Horribly.
    *hides from Hotspur*

  402. don’t need to hide, just get out of reach of his cane.

  403. Your mom says he has a really hard cane.

  404. We were at Restaurant Depot yesterday and it was only $17 for a 50 lb bag. We were going to split them up with friends and family but something got to them.

    It would take me an hour and a gallon of gas to return them.

  405. I wonder if the EPA has rules on food that you feed to wild animals.

  406. It’s horrily unfair that HIV strikes mainly gay men and IV drug users. Everyone should have it equally.

    I always laugh when I see ads claiming “Anyone can get AIDS”. Technically, it’s true, but…

  407. We got ground beef for $3 per lb, fish for $2 per lb, and chicken quarters for .49 per lb.

    That place kicks butt.

  408. He was arrested, found guilty of songcrimes—something even Orwell failed to foresee—and sent down.

    I apologize for my oversight.

  409. Well , Internet went down and I can’t poat on my phone. I can use what I started Ned next week.

  410. Ned Neutrality.

  411. Sounds like good prices. Every once in a while I see chicken hindquarters for .50 a pound.

  412. >>>We got ground beef for $3 per lb, fish for $2 per lb, and chicken quarters for .49 per lb.

    How much for the leetle girl?

  413. I’m a big fan of NED talks.

  414. We’ve got both kinds, country AND western!

  415. Harry Reid lost eyesight in his right eye. I will be praying for his left eye.

  416. Reid should never have crossed his Mafia bosses.

  417. I eventually decided TED talks are for dipshits.

    Who “f*cking LOVE Science! (sexually)”.

  418. I hope Pelosi talks to the Don next.

  419. What’s the best parody of TED talks online? The Ted talks all smack of a cross between a real estate seminar and EST.

  420. I learned something from one TED talk: bacterial quorum sensing. That’s kind of cool.

    Two TEDx talks were worth watching: Jeff Greason and Gary Wilson.

  421. Mike Rowe was pretty good at TED.

  422. I’ve seen some TED talks that were pretty good.

    *polishes dipshit credential*

    Also Science and I? Are we friends? Yes. Do we talk? No.

  423. Then you aren’t at the same level as DOCTOR Degrasse-Tyson, are you?

    *preens smugly

  424. Rowe’s TED talk was great, but it wasn’t science or tech or entertainment. It was an indictment.

  425. That Dutch general’s TED talk about why he chose the gun was pretty good.

  426. In their constant celebration of gender-bending, NPR still has time for old-fashioned transvestites. On the April 3 Morning Edition, their headline was “Longtime Couple Found That Clothes Didn’t Make The Man.” The producer, Liyna Anwar, tweeted “He’s a Vietnam vet who teaches electric power tech. He just does it all in a dress.”

    Anchor Steve Inskeep introduced America to “Sissy” Goodwin and his wife Vickie of Laramie, Wyoming.

    STEVE INSKEEP: Today, we have a love story from Wyoming. That’s where a man named Sissy Goodwin teaches power plant technology at Casper College. Sissy stands out on campus because he dresses in women’s clothing. He wears bows in his hair and prefers his toolboxes in pink. Sissy is not gay. His wife, Vickie, did not know that he wore women’s clothing when they met but has stood by his side for more than four decades.

    This was done with much more skillful talent decades ago in “Glen or Glenda.”

  427. Zeh goggles! Zey do nothzing!

  428. I’ve been liking this lately:

    Video takes me back, very retro.

  429. Zeh goggles! Zey do nothzing!

    Yeah, I’m just going to keep on being a h8r.

  430. Zeh goggles! Zey do nothzing!

    Good grief. We’re turning weirdos into special snowflakes instead of rightly telling them they’re weirdos.

  431. I gave up on the idea that TED talks were somehow useful when I saw a talk by some smug sonuvabitch demonstrating how to dry your hands with only one paper towel instead of grabbing a whole bunch.

    SPOILER ALERT: You need to shake your hands off in the sink!

  432. Leave it to NPR to find a Vietnam vet they finally like: a cross-dresser with zero sense of flair.

    Maybe Sissy Goodwin could get some pointers from Rosetta.

  433. New Poat with Men

    Or stay here.

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.

Comments RSS