I have finally figured out why idiot lib is a lib

Because he’s a fucking idiot. No, seriously, he has proven himself to be really, really stupid.  I’m talking “should be required to have people assigned to him to keep him from eating his own feces” stupid.

It’s been a nice year since we both agreed to stop talking about politics… or anything.  He broke that agreement the other day.  I knew I shouldn’t have engaged him, but he just refuses to shut the fuck up and I have to be there and listen.

Among the many topics that he chose to “enlighten” me on Tuesday night was, of course, global warming.  I mentioned, in passing, that I would like to see someone explain why the climate models that people seem to treat as The Word of God don’t seem to be matching with reality, as evidenced by the current 18+year pause in warming.

“That’s not true.” – he says.

*blink

*blink blink

“Ummmmmm, what?  You do realize that it is pretty much accepted across the spectrum that we are currently experiencing a pause in global warming, right?  This is not really up for debate.  Perhaps the reasons why or what it means are, but the fact that it is happening is pretty much accepted as fact.  By all but the most extreme environmental activists.”

“No.  That’s just not true.”

Okay, so that mercifully ends.  Wednesday morning, I do a quick search and find 4 articles form across the political spectrum that discuss the pause.

NPR:  A Cooler Pacific May Be Behind Recent Pause In Global Warming

Pull quotes:

“A study in the journal Nature could help explain why the Earth’s average temperature hasn’t increased during the past 15 years.”

“He and a colleague asked why the average global temperature has bucked its long-term upward trend. They also set
out to explain why — even during this hiatus — there has been record melting of ice in the Arctic Ocean, and why
there have been many new summertime heat records.”

“There’s no telling how long this cool phase will persist.”

His response:  “I think you printed this by mistake.  It is an article against your position in general and the idea of a pause in specific.”

Global Warming ‘Pause’ Extends to 17 Years 11 Months

Pull quote:  “Taking the least-squares linear-regression trend on Remote Sensing Systems’ satellite-based monthly global mean lower-troposphere temperature dataset, there has been no global warming – none at all – for at least 215 months.”

His response:  “Author is a conservative politician who studied classical literature and journalism.  He also has some weird views on homosexuality and aids that you might be interested in.  As for the info, in the article, I can’t rebut it.  I would defer to a climatologist.  It might not need to be rebutted, however, as you conveniently provided the NPR article which is a rebuttal to this.”

Global Warming Pause Hits 18 Years On RSS Data

I guess this article was too complicated for him, as his only response was “I can’t understand what this article is about, except that there is a Canadian economist who is skeptical about climate change claims.”

This one is my favorite:

EPA Chief: Pause In Global Warming ‘Doesn’t Represent Climate’

I only gave this one to him because it quotes Environmental Protection Agency chief Gina McCarthy referring to the pause.

His response:  “OMG, Politics again!  Give me a fucking break!”

I found that response hysterically lacking in self-awareness, considering his response to the second article above.

I guess i have no greater message to offer here other than one that is already painfully obvious to most of you, that being “liberals are really stupid.”  I guess the part that annoys me about them, though, is that they really do think they are smarter than everyone else.  The smug, haughty, superior attitudes they display while they spout just the most ignorant nonsense is both infuriating and hilarious.

But it’s not a religion.

167 Comments

  1. The descent of Janeane Garafalalafalo into insanity and hatred is mirrored in her descent from a pretty comedienne into a tattooed, pierced, uncured leather potato sack.

  2. BTW, his responses are exact quotes. He wrote them on the articles I gave him and left them in my mailbox.

  3. This post would’ve been perfect, but no Thor. Norse god of Thunder. Even topical.

  4. Isn’t One Direction now Two Directions?

    I’m sorry, this is comment of the week.

  5. Now, back to read wiser’s drivelthe poat.

  6. Yeah, I used to think she was cute as well, GO. But now I see her, even in her younger days, and say to myself “What were you thinking?”

    damn shame.

  7. I learned that lesson long ago. Never, ever engage a proggy in e-mail exchanges. It’s a sink of time and dimension that rivals the power of a black hole. Plus, the asshole in my case even used my address to sign me up for a progtard newsletter. A truly vile person.

  8. And why wouldn’t the happily married couples just add a robot sex maid to the household?

    Guatemalans are cheaper.

  9. Isn’t One Direction now Two Directions?
    I’m sorry, this is comment of the week.

    *checks Car in’s collection of the giant purples for double-ended models*

  10. Also, Guatemalans are easier on your electric bill.

  11. The descent of Janeane Garafalalafalo into insanity and hatred is mirrored in her descent from a pretty comedienne into a tattooed, pierced, uncured leather potato sack.

    She was cute when she was younger. It’s a damn shame that she turned out crazy.

  12. Hehe, so true, so true. Such hate speech, denier.

  13. Mystery Men is still a favorite. Her and that bowling ball.

  14. I learned that lesson long ago. Never, ever engage a proggy in e-mail exchanges.

    The original discussion was face-to-face.

    I handed him print-outs of these articles, on which he wrote his responses.

    Fucking idiot spent more time googling the authors to find reasons to dismiss them than he did looking up Global Warming pause.

  15. Part of your enemy’s panicked irrationality might be due to the fact that, according to a recent Gallup poll in the last few days, a vast majority of Americans don’t consider global warming (hysteria) a serious issue. Poor lib. So alone.

  16. spent more time googling the authors to find reasons to dismiss them than he did looking up Global Warming pause.

    Why look up something that his god says doesn’t exist? Blasphemer.

  17. Guatemalans are cheaper.

    Tell that to Arnold Schwarzenegger.

  18. Just to be sure, hypothetically, if there were a long pause in Teh Warmening, it would merely be evidence of the warming being hidden. If there weren’t, obviously that would be evidence of the warming too. No way to prove whether the conjecture is false.

    Unfalsifiable hypotheses. Not what you could call science.

  19. Guatemalans are cheaper.
    Tell that to Arnold Schwarzenegger.

    He can afford a few luxuries.

  20. One of the disses against Cruz is that he’s a Climate Denier.

  21. I was warming up your mom, but then I paused.

  22. He can afford a few luxuries.

    That was his mistake, he gambled and tried to do it on the cheap.

  23. I thought there was some underwater volcanic action in the arctic.

    And how does he explain the record ice happening in the antarctic?

    Or former co-founder of Greenpeace guy saying the warmists are batshit?

  24. it would merely be evidence of the warming being hidden.

    heh heh heh

    It’s hidden at the bottom of the ocean. Like a kid playing hide and seek.

  25. Dear oh wise libtard, please explain how Greenland got it’s name.

  26. Rome would never have bothered with England as cold as it is now.

  27. Comment by beasn on March 26, 2015 1:38 pm

    Dear oh wise libtard, please explain how Greenland got it’s name

    It was all some conspiracy by Erik the Red to lure people there.

  28. Erik the Red named Greenland? How Christmasy!

  29. There is no global warming? Tell that to the New Yorkers living underwater.

    I’ve had to tell my children what snow was like. It’s really sad.

  30. Or former co-founder of Greenpeace guy saying the warmists are batshit?

    He’s fringe. Just like the incredibly well-respected Swedish climate scientist who recently took a look at the data and started asking uncomfortable questions

    Well, I should say “formerly” incredibly well-respected Swedish climate scientist. Once he stepped off the reservation, he was ostracized with extreme malice.

    But it’s not a cult.

    http://www.breitbart.com/london/2014/05/14/climate-science-defector-forced-to-resign-by-alarmist-fatwa/

  31. Something positive wiser can give to his buddy.

    Oh, I totally understand his specific type of crazy. He was a philosophy major.

  32. Never forget that the left is a religion.

    Their commandments are:
    I – Thou shalt not restrict abortion
    II – Thou shalt not doubt Global Warming
    III – Thou shalt not deny your white privilege
    IV – Thou shalt not keep what your earned
    V – Thou shalt not believe in capital punishment
    VI – Thou shalt not define marriage
    VII – Honor thy father and thy father or thy mother and thy mother
    VIII – Thou shalt not believe in school choice
    IX – Thou shalt not believe in right to work
    X – Thou shalt look the other way when a democrat breaks society’s rules

    Just remember, you didn’t build that.

  33. He was a philosophy major.
    So basically, an idiot to begin with.

  34. Funny this poat should come along at this time. Mrs. Pendejo is telling me this morning just as I’m trying to awake and join the world but before I’ve thrown off the covers that she’s going to defriend a high school classmate on Facecock. We’ve discussed this woman’s fucked up worldview a time or two before so this wasn’t news but I asked her what it was that finally broke the camel’s back.

    But first, a little background: This woman was valedictorian of my wife’s HS class, has a PhD from Brown U in Biology and is a professor of microbiology and Central Michigan University. She has the ability to learn complex subjects evidently, but lacks the ability to determine fantasy from reality.

    So what caused my wife to decide to defriend her? This PhD in Biology goes on a facedick rant last night about how badly the American media have propagandized us against muslims over our lifetime. Muslims are victims out the ass and are victimized by western civilization like no other group has EVAH been victimized and yet the American media has continuously slandered them to the point that the avg American considers muslims to be VIOLENT PSYCHOPATHS. They’re less violent than the average American. Really you guys, they are.

    I dont’ recall seeing any Americans get involved in beheading or pushing walls over on folks lately, but damned if I’m going to argue with her. In my book she’s just a well educated, mentally ill person.

  35. There is a difference between being educated, and being smart. Anyone can get an education.

  36. and your mom.

  37. Americans aren’t known for destroying priceless cultural artifacts that aren’t Islamic, either.

  38. Pendejo, my dad and my brother like to brag how smart that brother is. He was second in his highschool graduating class, was accepted at one of the hi-falootin military schools (but pussed out and didn’t go), and was 3/4 of the way through his engineering degree before deciding it was all bullshit.

    He is now shacked up with some gal, doesn’t have a job, the IRS is after him, and he believes the United States is illegitimate and because it is so, he is no longer her citizen, but a resident of the MO Territory.

  39. Oh, and there is still massive discrimination against blacks and the US gov. was behind 9/11.

  40. Sounds legit.

  41. Your wife should suggest to her friend to meet with ISIS and give them a hug.

    I’m sure they’ll check to see if she has been properly circumsized.

  42. Make that 3/4 of the way through his eng. degree at the Harvard of the Midwest. His company, at the time, paid 75% of his tuition. Until he sexually harassed a coworker….was moved around…and I can’t remember if he got fired.
    Apparently anyone wearing a set of nice tits are doing so to tempt the men they work with.

  43. Whilst I’m on the topic of my trying to get going this morning and wading through bullshit at the same time: My wife likes to watch the local CBS news morning show. The newsgirl and the weatherboy have a pretty good schtick together.

    But at 7:00 it goes over to the Big National CBS morning show. Topic #1 this morning before I can get it switched to Fox and Friends? Jazz Jenkins is a 14 y/o trannie who’s going to help get the paradigm for the acceptance of trannies changed. She’s gonna be the Rosa Fucking Parks of trannyism. Or something.

    I damned near pulled a hammie reaching for the remote. Fox and Friends was livecasting the grilling of some French bureaucrat over the German plane crash deal. Not terribly interesting but at least I didn’t want to totally fuck up a $700 tv out of the deal.

  44. He was a philosophy major.
    So basically, an idiot to begin with.

    Two regents at a university were discussing department budgets. One said “I wish our other departments were like the math department. All they ever ask for is pencil, paper and a wastebasket.” The other regent says “Or the philosophy department. They don’t even want the wastebasket.”

  45. Your wife should suggest to her friend to meet with ISIS and give them a hug.
    I’m sure they’ll check to see if she has been properly circumsized.

    And then they’ll throw a burqa over her infidel ass.

    Really, life is too short to deal with stupid people – it’s just too bad that there are so many of them.

    Of course, they think WE are the stupid ones, so…..

  46. Apparently anyone wearing a set of nice tits are doing so to tempt the men they work with.

    They can be a distraction. But one I’ve been willing to deal with most of my life.

  47. Muslims are victims out the ass and are victimized by western civilization like no other group has EVAH been victimized

    *cough cough blacks cough*

  48. Jazz Jenkins is going to grow up and be like other trannies, who either killed themselves or do videos expressing their regret at mutilating their bodies.

  49. She’s gonna be the Rosa Fucking Parks of trannyism. Or something.

    She’s tired of sitting in the back of the party bus.

  50. They can be a distraction. But one I’ve been willing to deal with most of my life.

    I doubt you tell your female coworkers, who don’t really know you from Adam, while working with them.

  51. No, I don’t. I value my testicles and my marriage. In that order. I do sneak a quick peek from time to time though.

  52. Btw, have you been following the pregnancy issue vs. UPS dealio?

    Gal accepts the terms of the job UPS offers her, which include having to lift 70 pounds. She gets pregnant and wants special accommodation as her doctor told her not to lift heavy things. UPS says you weren’t injured on the job, so you get unpaid leave. She sues because those injured on the job get light duty, why not her?
    I’m pretty sure her pregnancy was not the result of an injury on the job.
    The lower courts sided with UPS. The SC blubbered all over her and sent it back to the lower courts.

    WTF?

  53. Make that 3/4 of the way through his eng. degree at the Harvard of the Midwest.

    What years? I might have met him.

  54. UPS is like Hooters: it’s performance art and the props are heavy.

  55. Trust me, our UPS driver is not like Hooters.

  56. No, I don’t. I value my testicles and my marriage. In that order. I do sneak a quick peek from time to time though.

    My brother is not married and apparently didn’t give a f*ck about the dignity of someone else’s wife, or his job.
    He has a low opinion of women and an even lower one of his sisters (because we don’t put up with his and the other brother’s sh*t).

  57. Yeah, mine either. That’s the court precedent that comes to mind, though.

  58. Leon, he’s 54. Wash U. Through the 80s.

  59. I’m sure we can trust this to work.

    LAUSANNE, Switzerland (AP) — The United States is considering letting Tehran run hundreds of centrifuges at a once-secret, fortified underground bunker in exchange for limits on centrifuge work and research and development at other sites, officials have told The Associated Press.

  60. The mask slipped long ago, Billy. You go first. You tell us your income and let us divvy it up.

    Speaking to students at the University at Albany, Bill Nye the Science Guy said that a carbon tax was needed for the purpose of redistributing wealth.

    “We need, dare I say it, a tax, or should I say a fee,” Nye purportedly said Wednesday, right before an anonymous student began recording.

    “It’s not just to be mean, it’s to redistribute wealth,” Nye said.

  61. Ah, okay, thought you might have meant UM. They refer to Harvard as “the Michigan of the East”.

    And in the 80’s I was merely a young boy dreaming of sexually harassing my coworkers. Or my robot sex maid.

  62. http://www.wustl.edu

  63. I wonder if you can deduct those health fees seeing as how so many kids are on their parent’s insurance?

    https://sfs.wustl.edu/current/Pages/Tuition-Costs-and-Billing-Information.aspx

  64. And now, your moment of Zen:

    http://tinyurl.com/qee3ehu

    (found link at Ace’s. Made me feel all warm inside)

  65. Hahahahahaha

    That fucking tool got everything he deserved.

  66. My black heart pumped slightly colder when I read that.

    Pity about his kids. I hope they get the right lesson from their father being a pariah.

  67. That fucking tool got everything he deserved.

    I love the fact that he got fired TWICE over it.

    fucking douchenozzle. And he’s still defending himself. “Chik-Fil-A pissed me off.”

    Fuck you, scumbag.

  68. He’s got a douchebag haircut. What a tool. Wonder if he got an advance for the book or if it’s self-published.

  69. That fucking tool got everything he deserved.

    ——-

    I actually laughed out loud and had a warm feeling rush over me.

    On Rush’s show today he played some cuts of Ted Cruz being interviewed by some dickweed about global warming. Ted Cruz so thoroughly and so articulately layed the case out why it’s bullshit, all the guy could come back with is, (paraphrase)”Don’t you think since we don’t KNOW you should be more humble about your position.)

    These people make the veins in my head (and neck) pop out.

  70. “ever talk to someone so stupid they made you squint?”

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

    It’s funny because yes, yes they do.

  71. Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut and used all that money he WAS making to get his wife’s gums fixed.

  72. Also, HTF can you be a climate denier?

    Are you denying there is a climate? Huh? What?

  73. Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut and used all that money he WAS making to get his wife’s gums fixed

    WHOA!!!!!

    War on wimmens indeed….

    Actually, I was going to comment earlier that, after seeing his wife, I think he may have already suffered enough.

    But so far, she hasn’t shown herself to be a sad, evil, nasty little douchebag like her husband has, so I won’t say that.

  74. I wonder how many copies of his book have been sold…and to whom?

    ‘A Million Dollar Cup of Water: Discovering the Wealth in Authenticity’

    Yeah, alternate title:

    Pretending I like being poor because I have no choice.

  75. It would be justice if the Chick Fil A chick Elizabeth got to kick him in the balls every hour or so.

  76. Alternate Title:

    How To Fuck Up Your Life In Under Five Minutes!

  77. Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut and used all that money he WAS making to get his wife’s gums fixed.

    That was mean.

    Bad horse.

  78. Interesting too that people like him think it’s “hateful” for a company to openly support traditional Christian marriage.

    Best part? Chick Fil-A still does a kick ass business and had quite an upsurge since his idiocy.

  79. I wonder how many copies of his book have been sold…and to whom?

    I guarantee you it is self-published.

    1 of the 3 Amazon reviews:

    After I read this book, I felt my heart explode with emotions I didn’t expect to feel. I enjoy reading true stories and this one did not disappoint. This book is a slice of what a REAL life is like in current day America. Adam Smith’s story is complete with spare beginnings and social media distortions: it had me from the get go.

    I like the word ‘authenticity’ in the title, because that is one of the reasons I felt emotional when reading it. I can tell the author dug deep to share himself as he really is and not what people perceive him to be. He made himself vulnerable, doesn’t act like a victim in the stories, and shared a lesson all of us can benefit from. I will most definitely recommend this to my friends and not just my book club.

    BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!!!

    Well, now we know the name of one of his sons…..

  80. Some random guy, the employee at the “hateful” business was polite and accepted his apology. Because she’s “hateful.”

  81. I would suggest that people leave “creative” reviews on his book to offset his family’s reviews, but I would hate to imagine that prompting one more book getting bought that otherwise wouldn’t have been.

  82. Well, now we know the name of one of his sons…..

    hahahahahahah

    —–Oh and Somerandomguy, you know who else needs to have their gums fixed? Yeah, you got it, that bitch Michelle Obama.

  83. I will most definitely recommend this to my friends and not just my book club.

    ——–

    Yeah, between the wine guzzling, and the appetizer snarfing I’m sure housewives will love the touching story of a “nice heterosexual guy” who comes of age and realizes that, hey, being poor is actually awesome especially with four kids and a wife with dental problems (I threw that last part in for somerandomguy).

  84. social media distortions

    yeah… total distortion based on the video that you posted on your social media page that you were proud of….

    I really fucking hate people like this more and more each day. He thought he was gonna become some kind of Internet Hero That Spoke Truth to Power and, instead, he got his ass handed to him for being a vile little POS.

    Yeah, I can totally see the “social media distortion” problem here. Totally.

  85. This is the kind of shit that makes me hate my fellow man.

    http://www.theguardian.com/culture/2015/mar/26/hot-prospect-russell-brand-voted-worlds-fourth-most-influential-thinker

    Totally on topic. More idiots going to do idiot stuff.

  86. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!!

    I just noticed… the cover is a spilled puddle of water.. in the shape of a heart…. with two faces in the puddle….

    both his.

  87. Elizabeth from Chick Fil A wouldn’t make fun of peoples dental problems.

  88. This is the kind of shit that makes me hate my fellow man.

    Starfuckers gonna starfuck…..

  89. Elizabeth from Chick Fil A

    ——-

    Yeah, she seems really sweet and handled the deal perfectly.

  90. Would you guys look at what is advertised with this book, or if it’s just my feed:

    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=a+million+dollar+cup+of+water

    Scroll down and laugh.

  91. Scroll down and laugh.

    BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!!!

    Set of 4?

  92. Dammit mare, now that’s gonna show up in my search history.

  93. SRG, I think it has been pretty well established that mare… is not Elizabeth.

  94. Set of 4?

    —-

    hahahaha…I know, do people do that in groups?

  95. SRG, I think it has been pretty well established that mare… is not Elizabeth.

    ——

    True, however, in the real world I would never, ever comment or kid a person for how they look. I’ve been like that since I was a kid, never wanted to embarrass someone. I’ve got my own problems.

  96. Set of 4?

    Hurry! Only one left in stock!

  97. I’ve got my own problems.

    ……………..

    *cough

  98. hahahaha…I know, do people do that in groups?

    you’ll have to ask Xbrad, Sean, Chumpo and Pendejo….

    Oh look! Set of 4!

  99. you’ll have to ask Xbrad, Sean, Chumpo and Pendejo….

    ——-

    *closes eyes, pictures scene, kills self*

  100. Oh and another pro-tip:

    Do NOT search, “girl in pigtails”

  101. Mate, have you ever heard the term “safe search?”

  102. Comment by mare on March 26, 2015 5:07 pm

    Would you guys look at what is advertised with this book, or if it’s just my feed:

    I don’t get it. What do instant noodles have to do with his book?

  103. Yes.

  104. Poor people food, like Ramen.

  105. Chikfila should offer him a job, just so they can fire him too.

  106. This is why I read this blog

    http://tinyurl.com/nn5lnz5

  107. Had to go from moderate to strict.

  108. They should have named that thing Egghead.

  109. It’s always about the buttsechs here.

  110. Well… I’ll be darned.

  111. This happened a few doors away from the ghetto bar. The kid on the left used to shovel our walks. Now he’s going to ass-rape central.

    http://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/index.ssf/2015/03/teens_who_beat_ann_arbor_resta_1.html#incart_river

  112. These are pretty good:

    http://twitchy.com/2015/03/26/he-asked-for-it-josh-earnest-solicits-askpresssec-questions-citizens-deliver/

    Read the last one, Josh Earnest is a lying sack of shit.

  113. http://imgur.com/f0SJC8a

  114. >>>>>http://imgur.com/f0SJC8a

    Pure evil

  115. Crack is whack!

  116. Mare, the MFM rarely says “Climate Change Deniers”. They are once again usurping the language to put “The Other” on the defensive.

  117. Just a thought here…. Israel and surrounding areas, including Mecca, get nuked.

    Muslims still have to perform the Hadj at least once in their lives.

    Except for the loss of Israel, I’m not seeing another down side here….

  118. Hotspur, when are you moving?

  119. Crack is indeed whack.

    I wonder if Ted K and Whitney party together?

  120. We can’t have possession until June 26 because they have a daughter in school. Then we’ll gut and renovate the kitchen. So probably August 1 or so.

  121. I wonder if Ted K and Whitney party together?

    WTF, man?!

  122. Mmmm crack candy

  123. Hotspur – You stay in AA?

  124. We’ll still have an A2 mailing address, but we’ll be in the Village of Dixboro, which Scott and Xbrad think is aptly named.

  125. Well, it *will* be, around August.

  126. Click the video in the first comment.

    http://is.gd/rPKObs

  127. Movers , lawyers, and real estate agents are at 150% capacity during the end of summer months. Nightmares happen then.

    Do whatever you can in the first half of summer months.

    People that move at the end of July get one guy that might have experience and 2-3 guys from a temp place, and one of them missing a shoe.

  128. We finally got a decent classic rock station here in the valley. Woot!

  129. Mj- volcano is #2

  130. Click the video in the first comment.

    Was not disappointed.

    *up twinkles with jazz hands*

  131. Hotspur – That’s only about 15 minutes from my kid’s house.

  132. MCPO, maybe you can help HS find a new ghetto bar in Dixboro. XB, ISWYDT

  133. Did anybody write anybody else up for being late again in spite of their detailed monograph on the fact that they experience time in a non-linear fashion today?

  134. Sean is rayciss. The concept of “Being on time” is a construct of white privilege. Cites BPT and mañana as a culture.

  135. Oso, no- serious. We finally have a decent radio station here.

    http://v6.player.abacast.net/2778

  136. Heh, XB. I gave up on Bro Country and I’ve gone back to Classic Rock. I still can’t believe our CR station plays Foo Fighters.

  137. in spite of their detailed monograph on the fact that they experience time in a non-linear fashion

    Put down the Thomas Pynchon novels, Sean.

  138. As I was laughing at Buffalone’s link, I actually started to wonder if we could ever determine “Too soon?”

  139. Wiser, can we keep Israel on the board and give up SF or NYC? DC?

  140. *writes up Scene for his insensitive use of time dilation and monography*

  141. I love the Dorkus pic. I wanna scritch the tummers.

  142. I still need to have the Hotspurs come visit the farm.

  143. -oso luv’ing tumors and scratching dicks…. hmmm-

    must be a monographical dilation

  144. doggehs love tummers

  145. Who doesn’t love a good tummy rub?

  146. Eeesh… why did I have to read any news.

    This Iran deal makes me sick to my stomach on so many levels.

  147. I still need to have the Hotspurs come visit the farm.

    Make him wear bib overalls.

  148. I’m gonna wear mine.

  149. Cyn, I don’t even enjoy our currently 70+ degree weather in March, because of crap like this.

  150. The latest man to score an interview with President Obama, Shane Smith, has conducted some hard-hitting interviews, including one with a Japanese sex doll.

    You’re not misreading that; in a video from 2008, founder and CEO of Vice media Shane Smith pays to have sex with a doll in a Tokyo doll brothel. The doll is shown spread-eagle on a bed, and the camera provides several gratuitous up-skirt shots.

    The whole sordid deed is then filmed in graphic detail, from Smith choosing a doll and her hair color, to deciding on an outfit for her, popping a Viagra, taking a shower pre-coitus, and then blurred-out shots of the actual act itself.

    “I’m excited, I want to f*** a cartoon,” says Smith.

    When exactly did this republic become a Charlie Sheen sitcom?

  151. Fy,NQ

  152. All my years in retail, and Spring continues to be heralded by pregnant unmarried cashiers. Current count at Sam’s Club is now 4.

  153. 5 if you count the girl in cafe. 6 if you count Ann at Membership. Kid #3. Baby Daddy is thinking marriage. Wants baby #4

  154. All my years in retail, and Spring continues to be heralded by pregnant unmarried cashiers

    I would have preferred April showers and nesting birds, but there we are.

  155. Just think: you get to pay for these babies with your taxes. Aren’t babies sheer delight?

  156. I would have preferred April showers and nesting birds, but there we are.

    If those girls had just gotten “April Showers” then we wouldn’t be in this mess.

  157. All my years in retail, and Spring continues to be heralded by pregnant unmarried cashiers. Current count at Sam’s Club is now 4.

    You need some sort of sign in the break room.

    “It has been X days since our last accidental insemination!”

    or

    “Shameful family secret count: X”

  158. I used to get major sads each year as all the unmarried girls would get pregnant. Dan and I are actually ok not bringing kids up in TFG America.

  159. CoAlex, there used to be jokes about the water fountains. I know more unmarried parents than married. Thanks SNAP/EBT

  160. Thanks, LBJ, for The Great Society! Okay, you can have it back now.

  161. If everything is awesome, how do we recognize evil when we see it?

  162. Dan is snoring. I’m wide awake. I work tomorrow. He told his Mom he’d help her with taxes. She’s refusing to go to the assisted living place Dan chose. She’s looking at hood creepy section 8 places. Even greedy SiL is like “Wha?”

  163. All you slow commenters have forced me into no mas pantalones night. No tweets. East Coast FB. Yawn. Marital sex is OK.

  164. I’m a coward. I follow people on social media that are in favor of Mossad taking out their enemies. Foreign and domestic. I just want to wear sports gear and watch opening day. L’chaim

  165. Those evil-natured robots
    They’re programmed to destroy us
    She’s gotta be derp to fight them
    So she’s taking lots of vitamins
    ‘Cause she knows that it’d be tragic
    If those evil robots win
    I know she can beat them


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